Bite of Passage

Did you read Twilight? Jonathon & David didn't and now Jacklyn & Sarah are forcing it upon them. Join these 3.5 creative writers as they dive in chapter by chapter. Follow along as we learn about Clumsy Jesus and her alternate dimension of Forks, Washington, where sparkly mythologies are made up, and time and distance don't matter.

Episodes

Ep. 0 - Camera Guy? Really Excited To Meet Him (Trailer)

October 17, 2020 • 12 min

Join 3.5 creative writers as they discuss the 2008 "exclusive" iTunes clip from the first Twilight movie.

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Ep. 1 - Vampires Are Notoriously Soggy (Chapters 1 & 2)

November 21, 2020 • 87 min

Join 3.5 creative writers as they take that slow dive into the world of Twilight with the first two chapters.

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Ep. 2 - Bella Is Clumsy Jesus (Chapters 3 & 4)

November 26, 2020 • 99 min

The team discusses the third and fourth chapters and wonder why the story didn't start here.

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Ep. 3 - This Nurse Is A Tethered Old Bus Stop Sign (Chapter 5)

December 10, 2020 • 76 min

While discussing the fifth chapter of Twilight, Team Fever Dream realizes that Stephanie Meyer doesn't trust her audience... or herself.

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Ep. 4 - What Are You Doing Just Typing Vampire? (Chapters 6 & 7)

December 24, 2020 • 93 min

Team Fever Dream catch a glimpse of good writing in chapter 6 and lose it just as quickly in chapter 7.

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Ep. 5 - Have A Date Ya Dingus (Chapters 8 & 9)

January 7, 2021 • 89 min

The group comes to a consensus: there is not enough murder in Twilight.

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Ep. 6 - Go Ahead, Tell Her I'm a Century (Chapters 10 & 11)

January 21, 2021 • 78 min

When the gang realizes Chapter 10 is a re-run of previous chapters, things go off the rails.

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Ep. 7 - You Wanna Put Your Murderer At Ease (Chapters 12 & 13)

February 4, 2021 • 91 min

Team Fever Dream covers the scene that inspired the saga.

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Ep. 8 - I Just Care About Quizilla (Chapters 14 & 15)

February 18, 2021 • 82 min

The gang discusses the vampire chapter of the Birds and the Bees for the first time. Don't worry, it won't be the last.

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Ep. 9 - Lives Can Wait for Baseball (Chapters 16 & 17)

March 4, 2021 • 82 min

Edward spoon-feeds the gang Carlisle's backstory and introduces everyone to Vampire's favorite pastime.

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Ep. 10 - Paper Kills Vampire (Chapters 18 & 19)

March 17, 2021 • 118 min

The gang agrees that the plot finally shows up but adds nothing of value.

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Ep. 11 - No Breadcrumbs, Entire Baguettes (Chapters 20 & 21)

March 31, 2021 • 76 min

Two vampires are traveling to Arizona. If one is traveling by car and the other is traveling by plane, who gets first dibs on Bella?

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Ep. 12 - Twilight is Arguably More Sexual than Gilmore Girls (Chapters 22 & 23)

April 14, 2021 • 114 min

We're given off-screen deaths, surface-level backstories, and more questions than answers. Twilight is nothing if not missed potential.

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