Black and White and Gold

We hear about the “toxic masculine” all the time, and directly attribute the Alpha Bro poison to patriarchal society, but we don’t often talk about the toxic feminine unless we’re just flat out making fun of women…which continues to engrain the problem.

In the world of cinema, few films resonate as profoundly as Mean Girls, a comedic exploration of the complexities of high school life and the sneaky dynamics of underdeveloped female...

Feminism is so broad, sometimes we caricature the whole movement and then steer clear. This episode is intended to continue our conversation the last two weeks about what feminism is and how it presents and impacts the world.

Today, we dive into understanding how different types of feminism, as well as different manifestations of oppression affect people in ways that can’t easily be addressed from one angle.

Did you learn something?...

This conversation delves into the multifaceted nature of feminism, exploring its various waves and types, including liberal, radical, socialist, and cultural feminism. The hosts discuss the historical context, key figures, and the importance of intersectionality in understanding women's rights and gender equality. They emphasize that feminism is not a singular movement but a complex interplay of ideas and experiences that seek to a...

I grew up knowing that there was little to nothing I could do that would be worse than being a “Feminist.”

But once I learned more about what that word meant, and how much I was benefitting in my life from all my feminist foremothers, it was obviously a place I needed to be.

The more I learn about history, the more I understand the way that opposing forces are what shapes society, and an individual's environment in that society plays...

Some people will look at all of this (gestures to the whole world) and say, “Gee…looks like patriarchy is everywhere, that must mean God meant it to be that way.”

But friends, we’re a little smarter than that by now, yes? Let’s look closer at some other options, today, particularly talking about matriarchies.

What are they? Where are they? When are they? Get the point? Let’s discuss and see how and when the “opposite” of patriarchy ...

Though what we call “Purity Culture” has tentacles in many generations, it seems to have a significantly deep effect on younger the Gen-X and Millennial generations. Purity Rings and pledges, Daddy-Daughter balls, girls being taught by church leaders that they were “walking pornography,” and thousands of other examples of teachings ingrained into the minds of children and youth have an effect…and if you’re taking mental health into...

We don’t want to talk about such a painful topic without offering help to heal. This episode is all about that.

We also mention stickers. You can shop stickers (and all sorts of other things!) on Carly’s website.

Shadow questions for healing:

What parts of yourself have you been told are too much?

What parts of yourself have you been told are not enough?

Where have you silenced your voice because you were afraid of being shamed or ju...

This conversation is split in two parts. The first discusses how one of the greatest harms of patriarchy is that it forces us to split from our own selves. The second, how we can work to repair that split to heal. Join us next week for the second piece!

Be warned, we don’t mince words: this is a harmful system that benefits many of us on some level, but does more harm in the process. We discuss the silencing of voices, the internali...

This conversation was so fun to have two self-proclaimed “nice guys” talking about how living up to the standard set in a patriarchal society has both helped them and hurt them.

Steve has even transitioned into the life coaching space, primarily helping men from a similar background and mindset to navigate their relationships.

Steve's Website: stevethatchercoaching.com

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Ah, the double-standard.

The way the double-standards play out in a patriarchy are part of the reason we still uphold it. Because…let’s be honest…everyone benefits somehow. I know, I know…that’s not what we want to hear, and maybe there are things I’m missing (spoiler alert: there definitely are), but there are ways people of all genders benefit from a patriarchal system.

It just prioritizes men. and further than that, a very parti...

EDIT: Rebecca’s new book, Raising Trans Kids: What to Expect When You Weren’t Expecting This is available to purchase. You can also purchase/donate through her website (linked below), with the option of purchasing to donate to a family or community in need. We also recommend you ask your local library to purchase a copy for community use (I did this morning, and it took be about 3 minutes to request, and about an hour for them to c...

Flipping the tables on Carly this time…Rob asks all the questions without any heads-up on what they are. This is a raw, emotional take on that current moment of Carly’s story as she begins to see patriarchal structures for what they are—and how that changed literally everything.

For those who grew up being taught a more egalitarian way, it may be foreign to see how some of us struggle to understand the dynamics…but when you have ne...

I had it in my mind that I wanted to interview Valerie Hamaker of Latter Day Struggles, but was torn between talking about faith crisis for Season 2, or patriarchy for Season 3. When she offered to meet with us in the wake of their resignation from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I knew it needed to be about patriarchy…as it’s fingers were all over their story, and the faith crisis/transition narrative tells itself...

Season 3 is here!

In this episode, we delve into the complex topic of patriarchy, exploring its definitions, manifestations, and implications in society. We discuss the importance of understanding patriarchy not just as a system that is inherent to benefits men, but as a structure that can be harmful to all genders. The conversation highlights the need for self-reflection and engagement in discussions about gender roles, representat...

In this episode, we dive into the intricate tapestry of family dynamics and religious expectations with Carly’s cousin-in-law (that’s a thing…promise), Abbie. Abbie shares her personal journey of navigating her upbringing within the church, the challenges of balancing personal beliefs with familial expectations, and the profound impact these experiences have had on her family life. Join us as we explore the complexities of faith, i...

Our last episode of the official Season 2! We will be back again with weekly episodes starting on August 7.

We are looking to interview experts in the different aspects of patriarchal systems…know someone? Send them our info. We’d love to chat!

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LDS Faith Crisis Report PDF (complete)

Includes the graphs we reference...