Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey Ang, hey Les, how
you doing.
She just made me laugh.
She just made me laugh.
That's why I'm laughing.
I always make you laugh.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
But listen, I'm
really glad that you're feeling
better, because I know youhaven't been feeling well and
you know I don't like it whenyou're sick.
I know, I know, I mean yeah, ifyou're too sick to record and
all of that stuff, it's likeyou're too sick.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
It was bad and I
realized that how much of an
introvert I am, even though mostpeople wouldn't identify me
that way.
But I'm really an introvertedextrovert or an extroverted
introvert?
No, whichever, I'm definitely amix, and I just kind of melted
(00:55):
into myself.
Haven't gone out.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
But that's because
you were ill, but you found time
to sew.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Listen, it's one of
the things that you guys can see
.
Wait, it's like a bomb lookbehind like south you see what's
that.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I see, I see the
sewing machine, I see it, I see
it.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
That's, that's say
hello to my little friends
that's how I find peace and justthink and I remember my mom a
lot because I'm using my handsand my mother's hands are.
She taught me how to sew, buther hands are also very my hands
are very much like hers.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
It's so funny that we
both curate and appreciate and
love sewing.
I started to say creating, butI'm not as much of a creator as
much as I am a sewer, but I useit to reward myself at the end
of having to do something.
I'm like you're not going toget on the sewing machine until
you finish this task, Isn't thatcrazy?
Speaker 1 (01:57):
It's crazy.
And my mother, my freshman yearin college, I you know I had a
sewing machine at home and sheforbade me from taking it to
school Because she knows.
Freshman year what?
Speaker 2 (02:11):
a distraction.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
She knew, smart lady.
She knows me.
Yes, she knows me.
She's like you, ain't stayingup all night sewing You're going
to be staying up all night,working we all have our things,
we all have our things.
I remember I used to the thingwith my firstborn was reading
and I mean, you know they'rereally easygoing, whatever, but
(02:33):
the thing that you cannot stayup until three, four o'clock in
the morning.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
I know they used to
have like three or four books at
a time.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Under the covers with
a flashlight.
This was before the light ofthe phone was with a flashlight.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
So we all have our
things.
We all have our things.
So wait, welcome to anotherepisode of Black Boomer Besties
from Brooklyn.
You know who we are.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
You know who we are,
hey y'all.
I'm Angela and that's Leslie,my best friend of almost 50
years.
We are two free-thinking60-something-year-old Black
women and we have decided we'vemade the decision to live in a
more bold and joyful way, and westarted this podcast so that we
(03:21):
can share that with you andhopefully you will join us on
this journey.
So today we're going to talkabout self-imposed restrictions
that we put on ourselves.
Self-imposed oh, we're not goodenough, or we're we can't do
(03:52):
that, or those that person is somuch better at that than me, or
that person I could never dothat, all of those things.
But we're not going to talkabout it from what people think
of each of us, but ways thatthat has shown up with with us
and yeah, something happenedabout it, yeah with, with les
and as usual it was funny ashell.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
But then, hilarious,
point it and it was like wait a
minute it was it was.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
and if you do want to
support us, we do have
exclusive content on our Patreonwhere you can join at the $5 or
$10 level and get some behindthe scenes.
Usually after each episode westay and the stuff that we don't
want to talk about on screen wekeep recording and that's what
(04:38):
we share with our Patreonsubscribers.
So you can find us at theBestie Quad Squad.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Quad Squad yes.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Bestie Quad Squad,
and there's also a link in our
description that you can alwaysgo there and join us.
$5, $5 a month.
Come on now.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Yeah, you can do that
.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
All right, Go ahead,
Les.
Tell them what happened.
Tell them what happened.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
So we we you all
already know that Ange is a
coach Before she's done formalcoaching.
She has been my life coach foralmost 50 years.
Right, we used to call itdifferent stuff back then, but
right now it's coaching.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
It's coaching.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
So I think she was
telling me about either
something that someone was doingor embarking on a new idea or
some such thing.
And I was so serious I kind ofquieted myself and I'm like,
ange, this was over the phone.
I said I really need your help.
(05:42):
She was aching.
I was aching, I was serious.
I said I really need your helpwith something because I just
need some direction on what Ishould be doing.
I think I want to do like aside hustle or a side job, but I
don't know, I'm not good at toomany things.
(06:03):
That's where it started.
I said you know you have somany talents and abilities.
I said but you know, I'm notgood at too many things.
I really just have you knowlike one thing or whatever.
But I'm not.
I'm like maybe you can help mefind something that I enjoy and
can make money at, or whatever.
That's what I said.
(06:24):
I was very serious.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
And I was incredulous
.
I thought she was pulling myleg.
I thought she was pulling myleg, so, okay, okay.
So if you've been with us for awhile, you know that Leslie is
(06:49):
an anesthesiologist.
You know that she reallycommitted to her calling of
being a physician when she was36, a physician when she was 36,
(07:10):
a single mom at the time andshe decided that she was no
longer going to defer her dreamof becoming a doctor and she
applied to medical school, gotin and so on.
Okay, these are some points.
You may also know that wheneverLeslie talks about her work,
(07:34):
every time without fail, shewould do it for free, I would do
it for free, I have done it forfree, you might also remember
that Leslie took a leave ofabsence for some personal
reasons last year.
(07:55):
She couldn't wait to go back.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
I went back earlier
than planned.
Let me in.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
I was looking in the
hospital window.
Let me back in.
When you look at your dress thefireworks I didn't do that on
purpose, so if you put all thistogether.
Now I coach.
A part of my coaching is on joyfilled money making, and so I
(08:22):
talk about how you have to findout what it is that you are
really gifted at and the thingsthat you need, and make those
things a part of what you do tomake money.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
I was desperate.
I'm like I got to findsomething Ang.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
She's like Ang, you
got to help me, you got to help
me.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
You help everybody
else.
There must be something theremust be something.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
I was like wait, wait
, les, wait, hold up, wait a
minute, you've already found it,you've been doing it, you've
been doing it.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
And what a black
Leslie had no idea that this was
the thing that she was talkingabout.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
That she had found
her thing.
It's still her thing, but shewas, she was, she was kind of in
a like I was looking out there.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
There must be
something else.
Everybody else finds theircalling, but a part of it,
whatever.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
A part of it was that
you were beating yourself up
about the fact that you hadn't Isaid that because I don't have.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
My talents are
limited.
That's how I look at it.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
So I'll ask you
something.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
I'm going to ask you
something I feel kind of foolish
right now.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
But this is, this is
the thing, right?
It's a real thing, right,mm-hmm.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
It's a real thing
though.
And let me tell you I wasn'tjoking when I said that you know
when I asked for help?
Speaker 1 (09:51):
No, she wasn't joking
and let me tell you a little
bit more about the kind of Dr.
Leslie is Not the type ofdoctor, but the kind Actually.
Her kindness, her humanism, theway that she shows up for her
patients, their families before,after.
That kind of doctor that she is, leslie won when she graduated
(10:16):
medical school.
She won.
Was it the first?
Were you the first recipient?
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I was in the first
class as a fellow of the gold
humanism society.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Okay.
So she got an award basicallyfor her bedside manner.
Okay.
So she's not just and I'msaying just not to minimize it,
but she's not only awell-trained physician, she also
treats her patients as if theyare family.
(10:49):
And when I say that she doesn'tcoddle family all the time, she
tells them what they need toknow and what they need to do,
yeah, right, and that's how sheshows up.
So when she came to me folksand said, Angie, you got to help
me.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
You got to help me.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
You got to help me,
you gotta help me, and the other
thing is how much more moneyyou think you're going to earn
doing these other things.
That's what you said.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
You're like, you
already have your fat job and
you love it.
You broke it down so clearlyMade me feel a little foolish,
though you didn't reserve thatpart.
But you said it's like, les,what are you looking for?
You love what you do.
You're not happy when you'reaway from it.
You have a decent, lucrativesalary, you're happy.
(11:38):
What kind of side hustle couldyou pick up to tick all those
boxes?
And I said yes nevermind.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
It was kind of like,
let me get this straight.
And you know, there's, there's,there's something we do call
mirror mirroring, where you sayrepeat what the person said
almost verbatim.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
I should have denied
that.
I said it like I've done in thepast.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
So that they hear the
way you interpreted what they
said.
Right, and it's not yourinterpretation, but you're
trying to match, to mirror whatthey said, and so when she heard
me say what she said, she waslike what the fuck?
It sounded ridiculous said shewas.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
It sounded ridiculous
like but but we serious, you
know, I know it sounds funny,you know, and it's, you know,
indicting, of course, on my part, but I think it's something
that's pretty common.
You know that saying you don'tsee the forest for the trees.
So often I'm in thesesituations and I really don't
understand my role in it.
(12:50):
I have difficulty being anoutsider looking in.
I'm going to give you anotherexample that came up just last
week.
I was speaking to my aunt overthe phone and I was telling her
you know, about my plans to youknow, we were talking about my
plan to relocate to Panama andall of that.
And she says you know, leslie,she calls me Leslie, not Les.
(13:15):
Well, so many people call meLes.
But she says you know, leslie,you've always been so brave.
And I said what?
And she said you've always beenso brave.
And I'm like, what do you mean?
I don't feel brave.
And she says well, look whatyou did.
(13:36):
You've done this in your life,you know, as you mentioned, you
know parent of a child, singleparent of a child.
You went to medical school at36 and you did this on your own.
And now you're just, you know,you're planning to relocate.
She's like that's so.
I've always thought of you assuch a brave person, and I'm
(13:58):
like Arnonita I've never never,thought of myself in that way
Wow, I didn't, I didn't, Ididn't.
You know.
You know how I always thinkabout medicine and going to
medical school.
I'm like, if I can do it,anybody can do it.
You know, I've said that to youand I've believed it.
(14:19):
You know that I understand thatcircumstances had to be put in
place and the ducks had to lineup.
You know the Swiss cheese modelAll the circles have to line up
.
However, make the circles lineup and then it happens for you.
That's the way I looked at it.
So I presented that story to mytherapist right and she's like
(14:47):
what?
Say that again.
Did she do a me?
No, she did like a.
What Say?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
that again.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
And she says you
don't see yourself as brave.
I'm like, no, not at all.
She's like, well, making thesedecisions that you've made?
I'm like, but I only did itbecause I had to do it.
You know like I like parenting.
You become a single parent.
You stay up all night.
(15:14):
You go to work in a day, youput your child to bed, then you
stay up all night and you studyand this and that, and she's
like, and then you get amaster's degree and I'm like,
yeah, but and then I startedsounding foolish.
And then I and she's like well,don't you think that was brave?
And I says, no, I got amaster's degree because I was
(15:35):
teaching.
And I said, in case I didn'tget into medical school, you
know, that was going to be mybackup, you know so.
And she's like she said.
She said wait a minute, you'retelling me you get a master's
degree as a backup to doing, andI started sounding a little
foolish.
I'm like, ah, maybe, maybeyou're right.
(15:57):
But it's so funny because inall of my years I never looked
at myself in this way.
In fact, as you know, now theconversation is coming full
circle.
My conversation with you wasstarted that I felt that I
should be doing more.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Right.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
You know, like what
I'm doing, busy or not, it's
like there must be more outthere and I think that's what
really has.
Could be the type A, you know,characterization or so but I
think so much of my behaviorover the years has been chasing
(16:38):
something else, looking forsomething else, and we've done
podcasts about this previously.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
Yeah, looking for
something else, and we've done
podcasts about this previously,yeah, yeah.
So, like, have you startedinvestigating?
Like, what's behind that, is it?
I mean, we say it's type a, butI personally don't don't even
like that designation too much.
(17:03):
Um, have you thought about that?
Let me stop there for a moment.
Foolish, you felt foolish.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
What can you?
Speaker 1 (17:18):
let some things go
for goodness sake, you can't
talk about my friend like that,though you can't talk about my
friend what it is is.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
You know the way that
you presented it to me and
likewise the way that mytherapist Christine is her name
presented it to me.
I started as like wait a minute, but isn't that so obvious?
You know it.
It only things.
It was only obvious when it waspointed out to me.
You know, it was only obviousthat I have achieved so much of
(17:51):
my dream and I know I have.
I'm, I'm, I'm very happy.
I'm not saying I'm unhappy,doing what I'm doing Of course
not yeah.
I didn't hear any of that.
I didn't realize that.
It's like, if your dream ishere, it's like I'm here, but
once I'm here, it's like, well,what else is there?
Speaker 1 (18:08):
It's like that bucket
list thing it's the bucket list
thing, it's the bucket list.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
And, as I said at the
time, my friend, when I asked
him well, what's on your bucketlist?
He's like bucket list.
What are you talking about?
I don't have a bucket list.
I'm like what?
I really didn't know thatpeople did not have a bucket
list.
It, I really didn't know thatpeople did not have a bucket
list.
It's a thing, it's in thedictionary.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
What do you mean?
You don't have it.
Everybody has a bucket list,right right?
He said I absolutely do not.
Yeah, les, do you think there'sa difference between you know
either having one or not, butbelieving that if you don't do
certain things there's somethingwrong with you?
Because there's, you knowthere's a difference between,
(18:57):
like in the bucket list exampleyou, you thought not having one
was weird, and in the examplehere, you thought not doing more
than what you're already doingand I know your hours, you know
and you're on call and what thatmeans and how that limits your
(19:19):
movement sometimes and all ofthat stuff.
So that part about well, there'ssomething wrong with me if I'm
not doing more, it's like whenit goes into that it gets real,
like real shaky, and I really do.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
I love that you're
putting my personal business out
in public oh, thank you.
Thank you, I was being verysuperficial here.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I can't take her
anywhere.
Y'all heard her start this,right?
Yeah, because my therapist Wasthat me.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I misunderstood.
Yeah, that was you.
Okay, got it.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
But it reminds me
Remember you mentioned and this
was uh several uh seasons ago,when, um you spoke about your
prior husband your uh formerhusband and how?
When you guys the first formerhusband, when you guys got the
huge big house on the hill andall of this is like okay, we're
(20:26):
in our dream house and this, andright away he's like okay,
what's next?
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Right.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
Okay, what's next?
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
So I, too, understand
what it feels like to get to a
certain place and look aroundand it's like well, what else
you know?
Right, right, right.
And I think that's what it is.
It's not more.
The grass is greener on theother side, because I'm not
(20:55):
comparing my life or mycircumstances to other people,
right?
What I'm wondering is it's likewell, you got energy left,
don't you?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
yeah, so use it.
Yeah, but here's the thingright so okay, so we both are.
The new term is so is we're,we're both, so is that actually?
I have some of the so iss-e-w-i-s-t-s yes so is.
I will never say that w-i-s-t Iwill never say that, but okay
(21:25):
anyway, okay, be stuck in yourways, go right ahead ahead
Anyway, so I've been.
I was waiting for Leslie to join, um, join the zoom, and I'm
like, oh, I have five minutes Icould be working on, so I
brought it to my lap and sothere's a bit of an obsession,
right.
But there's the.
(21:48):
There's the kind of thing whereyou always want to be busy,
which I think I have, andthere's the kind of thing where,
because you were looking forsomething to not only that you
can do, but that can make youmoney, you money.
(22:14):
And that puts another level ofpressure on whatever you're
doing, when there is an outcomeother than the satisfaction of
doing the thing.
And obviously, if you're sewing, you wear what you sew or you
have it up in your house orwhatever curtains or whatever,
and you see, and that createssatisfaction.
But the part that kind of tookit over the top for me is when
you were like, yeah, I can makemoney doing that, what, what?
Speaker 2 (22:42):
You've already, I've
got a means.
What the heck.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
What are you talking
about?
What are you talking about?
But, seriously, like we havethese.
So the question is and I'masking myself this too, because
I absolutely not about this, butI absolutely have parts of my
life where I feel like I'm notenough, I could be doing better
at X, y, z or, and the pressureof that is really intense
sometimes, right, that's whywhen I say thank God, I mean
(23:45):
thank God around when we are sohard on ourselves about whatever
our thing is and we get so hardon ourselves when we aren't
kind of doing all that we thinkwe should be doing.
Yeah Right, and the pressure ofthat and what it is that I can
(24:07):
speak for me.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
It's just not a big
deal.
Yeah, well, tell me what.
What do you?
What?
Speaker 1 (24:11):
me, it's just not a
big deal.
Yeah Well, tell me what.
What do you?
What do you mean?
It's not a big deal.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
I'm going to say,
like my accomplishments, if we
want to call them that.
Outsiders say it's a big deal,but I've never felt that.
Right, Right, Wow.
You know I've never personallyfelt like a big deal you know,
yeah, yeah, wow.
Speaker 1 (24:30):
You know I've never
personally felt like a big deal.
You know, yeah, you're a bigdeal.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
You know, I guess if
I on paper, you know, I just
don't feel like a big deal,that's all I'm saying.
You know, I don't feel asaccomplished or finished, or you
know, is it a self-esteem issue?
Is it an imposter syndromeissue?
I don't think it's exactlyimposter syndrome per se,
because I know exactly who it is, that I am.
(25:06):
I just say that I don't thinkit's that special.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
Right right, right,
right, um I.
One of the areas where Istruggled with this is, um, I'm
the youngest of four.
Um, my siblings are were alwaysreally smart in school.
My eldest brother is a lawyer,my sister is a college professor
(25:35):
, the younger of my brothers isan engineer, and so, and I'm now
I'm an engineer also, butgrowing up in this family,
especially with my sister avidreader just always excelling.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Intellectual.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
Just yeah, an
intellectual, and those weren't
like.
I was good at what I was goodat, but I wasn't.
I didn't feel like.
I never read as ferociously asshe did.
I didn't even like reading.
Read as ferociously as she did,I didn't even like reading, and
so I was.
When mommy would tell us toread, I would almost stutter
(26:16):
because I was.
I just felt so much pressure ofwho I wasn't than who I was,
and I know those types of thingskind of extended into my
adulthood.
I won't even say I'll sayperiod.
(26:41):
It is something that Iconstantly have to work at,
right, constantly have to workat, because my wiring is to kind
of call out things that otherpeople don't want to highlight,
right, um, you know, like you'rein a business meeting or
whatever team meeting andsomething is the thing that
(27:04):
everybody's talking about butnobody wants to talk about it.
Well, my wiring is come on,let's talk about it.
Right, come on, let's talkabout it.
Well, my wiring is come on,let's talk about it.
Right, come on, let's talkabout it.
But when you feel like, shouldI be the one to do that, even
though inside it's like, oh myGod, why isn't it?
Speaker 2 (27:21):
It's got to be talked
about somebody.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
And I eventually had
to learn to be the one to speak
it, because I had to pushthrough the but why do you think
you're the one to do it?
Why do you?
You know who are you to saythat, and you're not the
smartest one in the room, andyou know those things.
I had to push through to let mytrue self come out to say the
(27:44):
thing.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
I feel that way, too,
I'm often in those situations,
as you can imagine, in thehospitals, as a patient advocate
, you know very often, you knowyou're going up.
You may be the only one in theroom to say wait a minute.
Why are we doing things thisway?
Right?
Or you know, did you everconsider such and such, or to
(28:06):
really talk to patients about?
Is this something that you want?
You know?
Do you really?
you know what are your feelingsabout this and whatever you know
, and sometimes it's goingagainst the grain because it
could lead to them cancelingtheir surgery or reconsidering,
or whatever the case may be.
I'm just saying that I feel one.
(28:30):
I feel that it's my calling,but also, as such, it is my duty
to be the advocate and to bepatient-centered first.
That's why I choseanesthesiology, you know, I
think that it was something thatI needed to.
I had only a brief time tointeract with patients, but oh,
the importance of that time.
One most people don't understandwhat anesthesiology is.
(28:53):
Many people don't know thatwe're physicians.
And I'll tell you, bar nonemost people are afraid of
anesthesia.
They are not afraid of theirsurgery.
Most people are afraid oflosing control and not waking
back up.
Oh, that's the number one.
(29:14):
Make sure I wake up is thenumber one thing that people say
to me.
You know, I've had a couple ofpeople say you put me close to
death and then you bring me backand I'm like, oh hell, no,
that's not what happens.
So no wonder they're afraid.
yeah, yeah, yeah you know it'slike no, that's not what happens
(29:37):
wow someone asked me just theother day after you put me to
sleep, do you leave?
I'm like what?
Speaker 1 (29:52):
And I guess it's not
intuitive.
Nothing is a dumb question,right, it's not intuitive.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
But I was like I said
, oh no, Every time your heart
beats, I'm there to see it.
Every breath you take, I'mthere to see it, but people
don't know you know, yeah, oh,my goodness, we'll do another
segment on like preoperativereadiness or stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Yeah, we have to.
I mean, we're getting at theage.
It was a while ago we did.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
We're getting at the
age where we need a couple more
procedures.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
We need just a yeah.
Yeah, we might need a little.
Procedures are coming up alittle more frequently, yeah
colonoscopies and all of thestuff, all the things.
All those things, thoseinvasive testing, right, right,
right, just to take a look.
Yeah, don't do that.
Especially, you talk aboutcolonoscopy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
But anyway, but yeah
it's.
I don't know and I know to pushback when I say, oh, anybody
could do what I do.
You know you just have to.
You know work hard, study hard,put your.
You know you really have toclear your life um, put things
in your life aside people,friends, family oh, that's all
(31:06):
you know aside to make it happen.
And then you bring it all backtogether and people are like
what are you smoking?
Speaker 1 (31:21):
What are you talking
about?
I'm like just that, just thatfor 20 years I have to tell you.
This is a little bit of anaside, but it's, it's funny.
So I spoke to my firstborn thismorning and, um, they were
asking me something mom, I need,I need some, some a physics
brain, can you help me tounderstand something?
And they, they um, said theywere working with these
(31:42):
substances.
Um, one is water-based, one isoil-based and one is
silicone-based, Okay, and theywere um asking you know why,
were asking why they weren'treally functioning at the level
that they expected.
And so I said, definitelythere's viscosity and friction
(32:02):
involved and heat involved.
And as I thought about it froma physics perspective, I was,
like you know, it's time to callAuntie Leslie, because this is
chemistry.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
I was thinking that
I'm like, this is chemistry.
I'm like this is chemistry.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
This is not heat and
mass transfer.
It is, but it's going into therealm of chemistry, eh, not my
thing, and so expect a call.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Someone not.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
But this idea, oh,
all you got to do is this and
this.
But you're right, I would couldnever, ever Do this, this, this
, this, Do that Because I hateto say it this way, it would rip
out my soul to be that.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:55):
And you got to do it
this way.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
You're right about
that.
Speaker 1 (32:58):
And don't forget, you
can't forget this part right
here.
It's got to be exactly.
And it is that very thing thatI dig and it turns me on.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
You do, it's like
there is predictability to the
world, and when there's not,then there's that.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
Then there's that,
but it's like it's.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
there's a certain
order that I I love it.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
And maybe I'm going
to take it back a little bit.
Maybe I could do it, but Iwould hate it.
I would hate, there would bezero joy in it for me.
There would be zero joy in it.
Well, let me say this.
Speaker 2 (33:38):
What I know about you
, why you would not hate it?
Because no, no, no, Okay youone Would not hate it because I
would hate it.
No, no, no.
Okay One, you're a flexibleperson.
Yes, Exactly.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
That doesn't sound
all routine to me.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
Well, no, what I mean
is you've heard of the term,
the art of medicine.
Yeah, I think that you wouldpull out the non-organizational
or regimented parts of theprofession.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
And that's what would
feed you.
Maybe, yeah, you know.
So, perhaps, maybeanesthesiology is not for you
you know, but some other aspectof medicine, perhaps that's a
little more fluid or that canyou know.
Your personality can be fed init.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
I think that you can
do it.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
But you're looking at
it in such a rigid way.
I like looking at things in arigid way, Les guess what?
Speaker 1 (34:36):
What about med school
, that part?
Whatever I end up doing, I haveto go through that part.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
You do have to get
through it.
You do, you do no bang up doingI have to go through that.
You do have to get lit, you do?
You do?
No, bang.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
It's like a four year
hazing.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
It's like a hazing.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
But what does morning
say?
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Even the longest rope
has an end.
Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
But you know what I
would be and you don't have to
get.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
A's in medical school
.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
You just have to pass
.
What would I be using the ropeto do?
You just have to graduate.
I wouldn't be jumping doubledutch.
I would not.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
I'd be jumping but it
wouldn't be a rope to do.
But not double dutch.
I hear you, it's not for you.
Well, thank God, you know.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
You found it early.
Did I and you know what I mean,but yeah, and tell me one more
time Anybody, everybody, can'tdo this.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Everybody cannot do
it.
Okay, everybody cannot do itBecause you know, when you were
reading off the parts, like youknow you have to do this and you
have to kind of clear somespace in your life and you have
to do this and you have to dothis, it's like you got to step
two and it's like no, no, andthen you have to bring it back.
(35:51):
No, that's not for everybody.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
No then you gotta
have your son move in with his
dad for seven, eight years, thenyou gotta go on rotations and
monique monique has said to melike what do you mean?
You work for 36 hours in a row.
Like really, what do you mean?
And I'm like, literally you goin at this hour and you leave
(36:14):
and you wonder what day is it.
And how many times have I goneto the parking lot and had no
idea where my car was.
Wow, it was that long ago.
You know it's stolen, thatlittle hoopty I used to drive.
I'm sure somebody took itbecause I parked it right here.
(36:35):
And security has driven mearound that parking lot so many
times.
They want to say, like youagain, doctor, you again.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
No, they did not
steal your blue Corolla with the
milk crate uh, with the powderblue milk crate behind the seat
holding it up yes, man, you'vecome a long way.
Baby, come a long way.
It's so good to be, to havebeen on that journey and so many
(37:04):
more with you.
Yeah, yeah really, really andtruly really and truly, anyway,
all right, what else?
Anything you else you want toshare?
Speaker 2 (37:12):
no, it's just, it
feel like you.
You just keep putting me in myplace, you know, I just like you
.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
You keep keeping me
around.
You can't have me around and menot be me Like you keep coming
back.
I think that you know you needto investigate that.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
Yeah, shoot, okay.
Well, I gave you tenure lastyear so I can't fire you.
You know I guess you're in, butyou know, honestly, leave some
comments about this, because Ireally think that these feelings
and these behaviors andthoughts that we have, that
(37:48):
we're talking about, I don'tthink they're that uncommon.
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:52):
You know I love it
when you guys come on our
websites or go on our YouTubepage or whatever, and leave
comments and tell us what youthink about these things.
And tell us what you thinkabout these things Very often.
Well, we always answer ourcomments, but very often it
leads us to developing othercontent and having other
conversations, you know asfollow-up conversations.
(38:14):
So we like that.
Speaker 1 (38:16):
We do, we do.
All right, we're going to bringit in.
Wait a minute.
What, what?
What I'd love for you tomention your book oh, listen,
listen, I this, and okay, thisis one of the places where I
(38:36):
well, you're a coach you're acoach.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
I've been using your
services for free for for
decades.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
I've been honing my
services with you, so I'm
grateful.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
So you can't charge
me because you weren't licensed.
Now you're tenured, that'sright, so you know.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
But no, honestly, you
should mention your book
because it's a good book, it'san easy read and it's practical
and it covers some of thesethings.
You know, but it's.
I think, it's helpful, you know,but it's, I think it's helpful,
sure, um.
So it's an ebook and it'scalled um.
We're too old for this and youknow it.
(39:18):
It it comes out just like thispodcast.
It comes out of this um desireI have for living with more joy
in my life and sharing that withothers.
Doing this podcast with my bestfriend was a joy decision that
I made.
I had to figure out how to doit.
I had to figure out how to setthings up so that Leslie could
(39:41):
see that it's something that shecould do and that she could
enjoy, because I know her.
And I know that she would needsomething more than hey, les, I
got an idea, which is the way Ioperate but I know that people
operate differently to kind ofget you to understand yourself
(40:04):
and then to understand otherpeople, um, and to use some of
this knowledge if you, if youdesire, to create, um, ways of,
of earning joyful, joyfully mademoney, and so, um, this book
kind of encapsulates some of thethings that I've I've learned
(40:27):
along my journey for for morejoy and it's called we're too
old for this because, listen,monique is leslie's sister.
We mentioned her a few timesbecause a lot because she's one
of the.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
In my head she's one
of the most.
Speaker 1 (40:39):
She's one of these
just wise, practical people, and
what she always says is thereain't too many shopping days
till Christmas, and basicallywhat that means is is for those
in our age group, we have livedmore of a life than we have left
to live and we're too old todelay more joy.
(41:01):
And that's what my book is allabout.
There's a link to it under inthe description and if you'd
like to get coached by me oreven investigated that, you can
sign up for a free consult andI'd be happy to speak with you
and you can see whether I'm theright fit for you and you get a
free copy of my ebook when youschedule time.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
Anyway, that's it.
That's what I wanted you to say.
Speaker 1 (41:26):
That's it.
Thank you, les.
Thank you, I appreciate this.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
So this has been
another episode of Black Boomer
Besties from Brooklyn, brooklyn.