August 9, 2023 • 27 mins
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In the world of consulting, there are some deep-rooted beliefs that often become silent roadblocks in our businesses. These notions, although common, can undermine our confidence, negatively impact our professional interactions, and cap our growth potential. In this rebroadcast episode, we're exploring and dissecting these prevailing mindsets that often haunt consultants at the early stages of their careers. Through insightful conversation, we'll unravel the origins of these limiting beliefs. More importantly, you will be armed with actionable strategies and transformative insights to help you break free, ensuring you not only navigate but truly excel in the consulting arena. Tune in to redefine your perspective and supercharge your industry impact.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
There's a misconception that we don't
exist, that somehow our abilityto excel at the highest level of
our industry is limited, thatovercoming barriers as a woman
of color would be insurmountable.
But what would happen if wedecided to venture out on our
own, despite everything we wereup against?
I'll tell you Welcome to theBlack Girls Console 2 podcast.
(00:24):
I'm your host, dr AngelinaDavis, a healthcare consultant,
consulting coach, highperformance fanatic wife and
proud girl mom.
I help transform femaleprofessionals into thriving solo
consultants and, just like you,I'm wearing all the hats and
doing all the things.
So this podcast is to empoweryou to move past fear, to start
(00:48):
and grow a successful consultingbusiness, despite the obstacles
you may encounter.
We'll dive deep into theconsulting practice, business
strategy, mindset and more.
So grab your cup of coffee ortea, if that's your thing, and
let's get started.
Well, hello there.
(01:12):
Welcome to the Black GirlsConsole 2 podcast.
I'm your host, dr Angelina Davis, and today we are going to be
talking about limiting beliefs,and I decided to do this in a
two-part series.
Can I call it a series?
I don't necessarily know if Ican call it a series if it's
only two.
I wish this was live so you cancorrect me, but we're going to
(01:33):
call it a series today.
We're going to do this in twoparts because I think around
this topic, there's a differencein what we see as limiting
beliefs when we first start andwhat we have to think about what
we may face later down the road.
So we're going to break this upa bit.
But in this first part of theseries, in part one, we're going
to be talking about how you canpush past limiting beliefs to
(01:56):
build your business, to buildyour practice, and I wanted to
really dive into this for anumber of reasons.
But one is because yourlimiting beliefs can really keep
you stuck and stagnant, and itis the mindset work that we
often overlook or don'tnecessarily prioritize that can
(02:20):
make such a difference in ourability to achieve everything
that we desire.
And really, when you'rethinking about this whole
concept of mindset work andchanging our beliefs and our
belief systems, it's really acontinual process.
Different challenges are goingto arise over time.
We're going to have to putdifferent tools in place in
order to tackle those challenges, and so we are going to start
(02:46):
here, at the beginning, whenyou're thinking about either
starting your consultingbusiness or you are trying to
really get that business off theground, because there are some
very common beliefs that keep usfrom reaching our full
potential.
Oftentimes it's because thestart is rough.
It just is.
It is a difficult place to bein.
(03:07):
You have to figure out how youcan actually package your genius
to sell.
You don't have clients rightnow to serve, or maybe just a
few.
It's not enough for you toreally live on or have the
lifestyle that you desire, andyou really don't know what to do
.
And it's because of thisuncertainty that our minds start
(03:28):
to play tricks on us and ourmind begins to shape how we show
up in our businesses, how weshow up to create and to build
something that we would reallybe proud of.
So I want to touch on threecommon limiting beliefs that I
think many new early stageconsultants face that can really
(03:50):
pose a problem and keep youfrom achieving your goals.
And once we're able to breakthese barriers down and really
shift our mindset around thesebeliefs, I think you'll see
everything take off anddefinitely move forward for the
better.
I remember when I first startedI had a lot of doubt.
I just really remember being sofearful of making a mistake.
(04:13):
I think a lot of this camebecause I was so worried about
what other people thought of me,especially as a woman of color
working in an environment whereI had no one else around that
looked like me, especially thatlooked like me serving in that
role at the time, and I thoughtthat I had to carry the weight
of all of that with me day afterday, that I couldn't risk being
(04:37):
proved wrong, that I couldn'trisk making a mistake, and that
was heavy for me and I began todoubt my ability.
I began to question whether ornot I truly deserve to be in
that role, and I didn't want toprove those who may have doubted
whether or not I could show upand work effectively.
(04:59):
I didn't want to prove themright.
You know, I didn't want tosomehow make a mistake that will
allow them to say I told you so.
I told you shouldn't havebrought her on.
I told you she couldn't do thejob.
I told you she wasn't going tobe strong enough, she wasn't
going to be smart enough, shewasn't going to be able to help
people the way that we need herto help others.
(05:19):
I was afraid of that, andbecause I had this fear, because
I had this limiting belief asto whether or not I could
actually show up and serve.
I had self-doubt.
That was the big limitingbelief that I had at the time,
and let me tell you whatself-doubt would do for you.
It will cause you tounderperform.
(05:40):
So it's almost like thisself-fulfilling prophecy when
you doubt your ability, you willcall in all of those things
that you fear the most, becauseyou began to question every last
decision that you make.
You question everything.
The advice you give that you endup giving to others is going to
be ultra conservative, becauseyou're worried about whether or
(06:02):
not you are able to go out on arisk and risk the chance that
what you're recommending may notwork or may be wrong.
You want to completely avoidtaking risks, and so it takes
you two to three times longer tonot only complete tasks, but
you're checking those thingsover 10 and 11 times.
You're not allowing yourself tobe creative when you're making
(06:25):
recommendations to clients, andso they feel as if you're not
pushing them far enough.
You're not helping them advanceat the speed that they would
like, because, remember, part ofwhat you're doing as a
consultant is really speedingtheir process along.
You're making it easier, you'reallowing them to achieve their
goals faster, but if you aredoing all these extra things,
it's taking you more time to getthem to that point, and so you
(06:49):
can't do your best work that way.
In order for you to get yourbusiness fully off the ground
and growing, you are going tohave to alleviate this doubt in
your mind, and although thereare a number of ways that you
can do this, the one thing thatI found to be helpful is really
tracking and recalling all ofyour wins.
(07:10):
When we're in a new environment, we're taking on a new
challenge, we forget that we'veaccomplished so much.
We forget how smart, howsuccessful, how intelligent, how
capable we actually are,because now we're in this new
environment, we feel like wehave to prove ourselves.
We feel like we have to dosomething different, that we
can't carry all of our wins withus, but in those moments when
(07:32):
you're starting out and you'rebeginning to build, I need you
to remember everything that youdid before.
I need you to think about allof those things that allowed you
to get to this point, what madeyou feel so confident to start
this business in the first place, what allowed you to see
yourself as an expert before youeven begin to be faced with
(07:53):
these doubts and these fears.
Those are those things that youwant to recall over and over
and over again.
You have to play this in yourmind over and over again,
because you may feel like you'restarting something completely
new when you're beginning thisjourney, but you're not.
This is a continuation of whereyou've already been.
This is a continuation of yoursuccess.
(08:14):
This is the reason why you'reable to start this business.
You're starting this businessbecause you have something to
offer other people, becauseyou've been there, and I think
we often forget to carry all ofthose wins with us, because that
is what's going to keep youfrom doubting yourself, from
fearing, from feeling less thanyou have to bring all that with
you, and you have to know thatin these moments when you're
(08:36):
just starting out, you're notstarting at ground zero.
You just have to remember thatyou are on a continual journey.
You are continuing to moveforward and advancing from the
place that you have been.
So if you are leaving a placewhere you've accomplished a lot,
you're starting your businessin that same place too.
Are you a female solo consultantor expert in your field who
(08:58):
desires to build and grow ahighly profitable consulting
practice, or are you finding itdifficult to build your business
and expand your presence inyour industry to generate the
revenue you desire?
If so, my signature program,expand to Excel, was created
with you in mind.
It's a 12-week one-on-onecurriculum-based coaching
program developed to help youcreate and implement a personal
(09:21):
strategy to build and grow ahighly successful and profitable
business as a solo consultant,no matter the industry.
So visit wwwexcelaconseltingcomto learn more and to schedule
your next step call.
A huge challenge that we allface when we're trying to start
a consulting business isfiguring out where our clients
(09:44):
will come from.
Where are we going to really beable to generate that business?
How are we going to get thesecontracts in order to really
grow and achieve all of ourgoals?
That just seems so overwhelmingwhen you're starting, and I
think that it's often funny thatyou don't notice how many
people are actually in yourindustry until you decide to
(10:07):
really compete for business.
You think at the very beginning, when you are getting that
business license and you'regetting your website up, you're
super excited and you think thatyou have something different to
offer.
You have no idea as to what'sreally out there.
I mean, you've done a littlebit of research.
Even you've analyzed theindustry and the situation, but
you see just nothing butpossibility when you're starting
(10:30):
.
But somewhere along that line,things begin to change and you
know it's like when you choose acar.
You go to the car lot and youare looking for a new car and
you may decide, hey, I'm goingto get that blue car with the
white interior.
I'm thinking about this Teslathat I saw in a park in tech the
other day.
But you're going to get thisblue car with the white interior
because it's unique.
(10:50):
You haven't seen anything likeit.
The thing was parked rightunder the light and I was like,
oh, this is beautiful, I love itand it's a car that I would
love to go and purchase rightnow.
And so you go to the car lot.
You find that dream car is blue, with the white interior.
You're like nobody has this,I'm the dopest person out there
and you buy it.
(11:11):
You drive off the lot and Ipromise you, in about 10 minutes
you're gonna see like 10 otherversions of it.
And you're just thinking toyourself I never saw this blue
car with white interior before.
But now, everywhere I turn, I'mseeing nothing but blue cars
with white interior.
Right Blue, tesla's white withwhite interior, and so this is
(11:33):
actually something that's calledI believe it's like the batter
mine Hoff phenomenon, and thisis something that we consider,
or is considered, to be, afrequency illusion.
It's an illusion of sorts,because in reality, nothing
changed.
There have always been bluecars with white interior on the
(11:54):
streets.
It's always been that.
We have had a number of otherblue cars out there, but because
you weren't noticing it, youthought it didn't exist.
You weren't noticing it becauseyour attention wasn't being
drawn to it.
You weren't being drawn to thatparticular car, and so it gives
you this illusion that you areexperiencing something that is
(12:18):
new and that didn't exist before.
But that's really not true.
Those cars were always there,and this is very similar to how
we approach business.
We can get in, get started andfeel like you just can't compete
.
I know, I thought that before Ijust can't compete.
The market is overcrowded,there are too many people trying
(12:40):
to do the same thing that I'mdoing, and that's just a form of
scarcity mindset.
You know, I read a statisticrecently that stated if you only
sold, only if you only sold tothe top 1% of wealthy English
speaking countries.
So this is the US, canada,australia, the United Kingdom.
(13:02):
That is, 3.6 million people, 1%.
3.6 million.
That was what I read previously, but I actually calculated the
numbers on this just for 2021.
And it is actually 4.6 millionpeople, 1%.
(13:23):
1% from a small fraction of theworld.
So I'm saying all that to saythat, yes, in most markets it is
overcrowded, definitely, witheveryone transitioning online in
the midst of the pandemic andall the changes that have
happened, you know, over thiscourse of time this is being
recorded in late 2021, just forthose who may be listening in
(13:48):
the future but with thetransition online, for most
people, it has openedopportunity, opened the doors of
opportunity for people to getstarted and to start their
businesses.
So, yes, it's going to feel likethe market is overcrowded, but
the thing is similar to thatillusion that we talked about.
That is our limiting belief.
(14:08):
That's us thinking that wecannot compete in this
overcrowded market, when themarket was always this way.
The market was this way whenyou got the business license.
The market was this way whenyou decided to start your
business and you thought it wassuch a great idea and you hadn't
seen it.
You have to remember that whatyou're feeling is a limiting
(14:31):
belief because it's an illusion.
When you have a scarcity mindset, you focus in on the challenges
.
You see the challenge ofstanding out in a crowded market
, and that doesn't near seemsimpossible, especially without a
massive marketing budget.
But what really complicatesthis picture further is that
when you don't see anybody thatlooks like you, then the market
(14:55):
actually seems even more crowdedand even more impossible to
break into, because you can'tsee another version that seems
similar to you, that has beensuccessful, and so in your mind
you begin to tell yourself thisis just not going to work.
You internalize all that ismeaning there's not enough room
(15:18):
for you to succeed, that there'snot enough room for you to
actually build the business thatyou want, that what you desire
is not available to you.
In reality, there is more thanenough room, just like I talked
about that 4.6 million people,1%, 4.6 million there are more
(15:39):
than enough clients out therefor you to serve.
There are more than enoughbusinesses for you to work with.
There is the ability for you toreally build your business.
So you have to switch thisthinking from a belief in
competition, in competing forbusiness, trying to win business
(16:01):
we talk about it all the timeas winning business.
That's very it's very common tohear that mentioned, especially
in a consulting world.
I won that contract, I won thisbusiness and technically
there's nothing, I guess youwould say wrong with using that
terminology.
But in terms of mindset, youhave to think of it differently,
because if you're thinkingabout winning that contract or
(16:21):
winning that business, you'reseeing it as a competition, and
in a competition typicallythere's one winner, and so in
your mind you're seeing scarcity, because you're thinking that
there is only one winner, onlyone person that can win the
business, only one person thatthat client can work with, and
in reality that's not true.
That client can choose to workwith multiple people, that
(16:44):
client can decide to work ondifferent things, that business
can contract with multipleconsultants.
So you have to change thismindset and really look for
instead how you can reallyconnect and collaborate with
other people, how you can beginto see that there is room for
(17:05):
you and there's room availablefor you to succeed.
This is actually more abundantthinking, and this is what will
keep you from stalling and notmoving forward, especially at
the beginning, becausepreviously you may have been
telling yourself there's no roomfor me, this is not gonna
matter, why try?
(17:25):
Because I'm not gonna be ableto succeed.
I'm not seeing any growth.
This must mean that my idea isbad.
Instead of you stalling onthoughts like that, you're
moving forward because you'refocused on if I can just get
this collaboration, if I canjust work with this one person,
if I can just partner withsomeone else, and that seems
much more feasible for you towin.
(17:48):
And so one of the things that wehave to overcome in terms of
limiting beliefs is thisscarcity mindset and thinking
that the market is too crowdedbecause it's not so.
This last limiting belief issomething that really comes from
a strength that mostconsultants have, and that is
that most consultants averageconsultant is someone who many
(18:12):
people would consider to be veryambitious, very ambitious and
to be overachievers, and that isa good thing.
That is what leads tooutperforming your peers and
what really helps you to reachthis level of expert status and
to enhance your knowledge andyour experiences.
(18:32):
But the thing to consider isthat we are often taking things
over the top, and that meansthat we're trying to make things
perfect, and, although this canbe a great thing at first
glance, it is also somethingthat can signal an area that can
be a limiting belief thatstalls our growth, that keeps us
(18:55):
from moving forward.
We believe that everything hasto be perfect before you launch.
This is an aspect ofperfectionism.
This is where perfectionismbecomes a huge obstacle, and
this limiting belief of needingperfection in order to start is
(19:18):
what keeps many people frommoving forward.
They may have started theirbusiness on paper, they may have
even done a little bit of workhere and there, but they have
oftentimes not moved forwardfully because they're not at the
place that they wanna be at.
The website isn't perfect yet.
(19:38):
You don't have the perfectcontent to post on social media.
You don't have the massivefollowing that would be perfect
for you to really put yourbusiness out there.
So you don't feel uncomfortablewhen people ask or friends see
you doing the work.
You have this perception ofperfectionism that keeps you
from growing and advancing anddefinitely keeps you from making
(20:01):
money.
So this is a huge limitingbelief.
It's this idea that we can'tmake a mistake, that we can't be
seen as being less than perfect, because that would mean that
we're not truly an expert.
It's that type of belief thatkeeps us stuck and as women,
especially women of color, wemistakenly see this imperfection
(20:24):
as evidence, sometimes, of howwe are not qualified for the job
, or how we are not truly anexpert, or how we are not at the
same level or our services areof the same caliber as our
counterparts.
It's that sense ofperfectionism, that limiting
belief, that keeps us stuck, andso overcoming this belief
(20:46):
really requires us to take thesethings that we have often seen
as standards, as examples ofwhat it means to be of high
quality, these people that we'veput up on pedestals and admired
.
We have to put those in theproper frame of reference,
(21:07):
because, in reality, thoseindividuals make mistakes too.
Those things that we're lookingat as standards are not perfect
.
None of that is perfect, andreally, this perfectionism is a
source of procrastination.
It keeps us from moving ahead.
We get locked in our heads, westart to overthink, we start
(21:28):
tinkering, we're evaluating allour options, we're constantly
studying and we're doinganything and everything else
other than taking meaningfulsteps and action to achieve our
goals, and so what that means isthat you're not building,
you're not growing, and Iunderstand because I have been
there.
I have gone through thatexperience where I've kept
myself busy working on anythingand everything other than those
(21:52):
things that are going to be tiedto me generating revenue, being
able to collaborate with otherpeople that are tied to anything
and everything but me beingable to land the contracts that
I need in order for my businessto thrive.
It's just all busy work.
It's all things that we thinkthat we need in order to show up
perfectly in the market, and itis a source of procrastination,
(22:16):
it is keeping us stuck, andthat is a belief that we have to
push against and we have tomove past.
You have to be able torecognize that, when
perfectionism is arising, thatthere is the need in that moment
to really resist thattemptation and that we have to
(22:36):
move forward with whatever we'reworking on, even if it's not
done to the level that we woulddesire.
Now, I don't mean, don't dothings in excellence.
I definitely believe that youneed to focus on excellence.
You need to be focused onquality, providing a high
quality experience, but thosetwo things are different from
things being perfect.
(22:57):
Just because something goes up,high quality, high value
doesn't make it perfect.
The knowledge that you're goingto be sharing is going to be of
high quality and high value,but it may not be perfect.
You're going to have iterationsthat are going to occur over
and over again so that you canmake it better and better as you
work with more clients.
As you go through thisexperience over time, you're
(23:18):
going to constantly improve.
It's not perfect, but it canstill be of high quality, it can
still be of high value, andthat's why you have to get
comfortable with really takingthis messy and imperfect action.
It doesn't need to be perfectfor you to start, and once you
realize that this perfectionismpiece, this need to be perfect,
(23:41):
this need to show up in acertain way it's just a source
of procrastination is keepingyou from starting, keeping you
from building, keeping you fromgrowing, then you will begin to
feel more comfortable takingthose steps, in spite of it not
being exactly the way that youwant to really get your services
and your offer out there.
People have to be able to seewhat you're able to offer.
(24:04):
In order to buy from you, inorder to request for your help,
in order to sign that contract,in order for you to convert
those prospects and leads toclients, they have to see your
services, they have to know whatyou're doing, and they can't
find that out if you are stuckin this perfectionism tailspin.
(24:26):
You have to move past that.
You have to stopprocrastinating and just get
started.
It doesn't have to be perfectwhen you start.
No one is perfect when youstart, I don't care who you look
at, no matter how big they areright now.
If you go back and scroll backthrough a lot of their older
content and how they showed upinitially in the industry, it
(24:47):
was not perfect.
That's actually an exercisethat I like to use and I have
clients use.
Go back through to the earlystages.
If they still have it up ontheir social media accounts,
which many do, scroll backthrough to the very beginning.
Look at what their contentlooked like.
Some of the biggest names inthe industry had some of the
(25:10):
clunkiest websites, some of themost disconnected and poor
content when they started, butit was the best they can do at
the time and because they didn'tallow perfectionism to get in
the way, to be their source ofprocrastination, and they
continued to move forward, theygained that clarity over time,
(25:32):
they improved over time and nowthey've achieved everything that
you're trying to achieve inyour journey.
You have the ability to go evenfurther, but you got to start
and so we have to get over thiswhole thought process, in this
perfectionism that is limitingus and keeping us in the same
place and keeping us from beingable to move forward.
(25:52):
So this limiting belief, thethird limiting belief that it
needs to be perfect, that'ssomething that we have to move
past.
These are just a few limitingbeliefs that we hold on to and
that we unknowingly allow toreally hinder our progress.
We allow these things to keepus from starting our consulting
(26:15):
business.
We allow these things to keepus from really getting our
businesses fully off the groundand growing and thriving, and we
have to get past that.
In order for you to accomplishyour goal, whatever it may be,
you have to get started, youhave to move forward and you
also have to overcome theselimiting beliefs in order to
(26:36):
successfully do so.
So in part two, we're going todive into some beliefs that can
keep us stuck in stagnant whenwe're trying to build and we're
trying to grow.
This is very different fromwhen we're starting, but they
still present themselves, theselimiting beliefs, and we are
going to find ways to overcomethem.
So you continue to reach yourgoals.
(26:59):
I want you to join me hereagain for the next episode of
the Black Girls Consult Twopodcast and I will look forward
to talking to you again soon.
Okay, take care and don'tforget to visit
(27:36):
excelaconsultingcom for moreinformation to support your
consulting journey.
Until next time, take care.
There's a misconception that we don't
exist, that somehow our abilityto excel at the highest level of
our industry is limited, thatovercoming barriers as a woman
of color would be insurmountable.
But what would happen if wedecided to venture out on our
own, despite everything we wereup against?
I'll tell you Welcome to theBlack Girls Console 2 podcast.
(00:24):
I'm your host, dr AngelinaDavis, a healthcare consultant,
consulting coach, highperformance fanatic wife and
proud girl mom.
I help transform femaleprofessionals into thriving solo
consultants and, just like you,I'm wearing all the hats and
doing all the things.
So this podcast is to empoweryou to move past fear, to start
(00:48):
and grow a successful consultingbusiness, despite the obstacles
you may encounter.
We'll dive deep into theconsulting practice, business
strategy, mindset and more.
So grab your cup of coffee ortea, if that's your thing, and
let's get started.
Well, hello there.
(01:12):
Welcome to the Black GirlsConsole 2 podcast.
I'm your host, dr Angelina Davis, and today we are going to be
talking about limiting beliefs,and I decided to do this in a
two-part series.
Can I call it a series?
I don't necessarily know if Ican call it a series if it's
only two.
I wish this was live so you cancorrect me, but we're going to
(01:33):
call it a series today.
We're going to do this in twoparts because I think around
this topic, there's a differencein what we see as limiting
beliefs when we first start andwhat we have to think about what
we may face later down the road.
So we're going to break this upa bit.
But in this first part of theseries, in part one, we're going
to be talking about how you canpush past limiting beliefs to
(01:56):
build your business, to buildyour practice, and I wanted to
really dive into this for anumber of reasons.
But one is because yourlimiting beliefs can really keep
you stuck and stagnant, and itis the mindset work that we
often overlook or don'tnecessarily prioritize that can
(02:20):
make such a difference in ourability to achieve everything
that we desire.
And really, when you'rethinking about this whole
concept of mindset work andchanging our beliefs and our
belief systems, it's really acontinual process.
Different challenges are goingto arise over time.
We're going to have to putdifferent tools in place in
order to tackle those challenges, and so we are going to start
(02:46):
here, at the beginning, whenyou're thinking about either
starting your consultingbusiness or you are trying to
really get that business off theground, because there are some
very common beliefs that keep usfrom reaching our full
potential.
Oftentimes it's because thestart is rough.
It just is.
It is a difficult place to bein.
(03:07):
You have to figure out how youcan actually package your genius
to sell.
You don't have clients rightnow to serve, or maybe just a
few.
It's not enough for you toreally live on or have the
lifestyle that you desire, andyou really don't know what to do
.
And it's because of thisuncertainty that our minds start
(03:28):
to play tricks on us and ourmind begins to shape how we show
up in our businesses, how weshow up to create and to build
something that we would reallybe proud of.
So I want to touch on threecommon limiting beliefs that I
think many new early stageconsultants face that can really
(03:50):
pose a problem and keep youfrom achieving your goals.
And once we're able to breakthese barriers down and really
shift our mindset around thesebeliefs, I think you'll see
everything take off anddefinitely move forward for the
better.
I remember when I first startedI had a lot of doubt.
I just really remember being sofearful of making a mistake.
(04:13):
I think a lot of this camebecause I was so worried about
what other people thought of me,especially as a woman of color
working in an environment whereI had no one else around that
looked like me, especially thatlooked like me serving in that
role at the time, and I thoughtthat I had to carry the weight
of all of that with me day afterday, that I couldn't risk being
(04:37):
proved wrong, that I couldn'trisk making a mistake, and that
was heavy for me and I began todoubt my ability.
I began to question whether ornot I truly deserve to be in
that role, and I didn't want toprove those who may have doubted
whether or not I could show upand work effectively.
(04:59):
I didn't want to prove themright.
You know, I didn't want tosomehow make a mistake that will
allow them to say I told you so.
I told you shouldn't havebrought her on.
I told you she couldn't do thejob.
I told you she wasn't going tobe strong enough, she wasn't
going to be smart enough, shewasn't going to be able to help
people the way that we need herto help others.
(05:19):
I was afraid of that, andbecause I had this fear, because
I had this limiting belief asto whether or not I could
actually show up and serve.
I had self-doubt.
That was the big limitingbelief that I had at the time,
and let me tell you whatself-doubt would do for you.
It will cause you tounderperform.
(05:40):
So it's almost like thisself-fulfilling prophecy when
you doubt your ability, you willcall in all of those things
that you fear the most, becauseyou began to question every last
decision that you make.
You question everything.
The advice you give that you endup giving to others is going to
be ultra conservative, becauseyou're worried about whether or
(06:02):
not you are able to go out on arisk and risk the chance that
what you're recommending may notwork or may be wrong.
You want to completely avoidtaking risks, and so it takes
you two to three times longer tonot only complete tasks, but
you're checking those thingsover 10 and 11 times.
You're not allowing yourself tobe creative when you're making
(06:25):
recommendations to clients, andso they feel as if you're not
pushing them far enough.
You're not helping them advanceat the speed that they would
like, because, remember, part ofwhat you're doing as a
consultant is really speedingtheir process along.
You're making it easier, you'reallowing them to achieve their
goals faster, but if you aredoing all these extra things,
it's taking you more time to getthem to that point, and so you
(06:49):
can't do your best work that way.
In order for you to get yourbusiness fully off the ground
and growing, you are going tohave to alleviate this doubt in
your mind, and although thereare a number of ways that you
can do this, the one thing thatI found to be helpful is really
tracking and recalling all ofyour wins.
(07:10):
When we're in a new environment, we're taking on a new
challenge, we forget that we'veaccomplished so much.
We forget how smart, howsuccessful, how intelligent, how
capable we actually are,because now we're in this new
environment, we feel like wehave to prove ourselves.
We feel like we have to dosomething different, that we
can't carry all of our wins withus, but in those moments when
(07:32):
you're starting out and you'rebeginning to build, I need you
to remember everything that youdid before.
I need you to think about allof those things that allowed you
to get to this point, what madeyou feel so confident to start
this business in the first place, what allowed you to see
yourself as an expert before youeven begin to be faced with
(07:53):
these doubts and these fears.
Those are those things that youwant to recall over and over
and over again.
You have to play this in yourmind over and over again,
because you may feel like you'restarting something completely
new when you're beginning thisjourney, but you're not.
This is a continuation of whereyou've already been.
This is a continuation of yoursuccess.
(08:14):
This is the reason why you'reable to start this business.
You're starting this businessbecause you have something to
offer other people, becauseyou've been there, and I think
we often forget to carry all ofthose wins with us, because that
is what's going to keep youfrom doubting yourself, from
fearing, from feeling less thanyou have to bring all that with
you, and you have to know thatin these moments when you're
(08:36):
just starting out, you're notstarting at ground zero.
You just have to remember thatyou are on a continual journey.
You are continuing to moveforward and advancing from the
place that you have been.
So if you are leaving a placewhere you've accomplished a lot,
you're starting your businessin that same place too.
Are you a female solo consultantor expert in your field who
(08:58):
desires to build and grow ahighly profitable consulting
practice, or are you finding itdifficult to build your business
and expand your presence inyour industry to generate the
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(09:21):
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A huge challenge that we allface when we're trying to start
a consulting business isfiguring out where our clients
(09:44):
will come from.
Where are we going to really beable to generate that business?
How are we going to get thesecontracts in order to really
grow and achieve all of ourgoals?
That just seems so overwhelmingwhen you're starting, and I
think that it's often funny thatyou don't notice how many
people are actually in yourindustry until you decide to
(10:07):
really compete for business.
You think at the very beginning, when you are getting that
business license and you'regetting your website up, you're
super excited and you think thatyou have something different to
offer.
You have no idea as to what'sreally out there.
I mean, you've done a littlebit of research.
Even you've analyzed theindustry and the situation, but
you see just nothing butpossibility when you're starting
(10:30):
.
But somewhere along that line,things begin to change and you
know it's like when you choose acar.
You go to the car lot and youare looking for a new car and
you may decide, hey, I'm goingto get that blue car with the
white interior.
I'm thinking about this Teslathat I saw in a park in tech the
other day.
But you're going to get thisblue car with the white interior
because it's unique.
(10:50):
You haven't seen anything likeit.
The thing was parked rightunder the light and I was like,
oh, this is beautiful, I love itand it's a car that I would
love to go and purchase rightnow.
And so you go to the car lot.
You find that dream car is blue, with the white interior.
You're like nobody has this,I'm the dopest person out there
and you buy it.
(11:11):
You drive off the lot and Ipromise you, in about 10 minutes
you're gonna see like 10 otherversions of it.
And you're just thinking toyourself I never saw this blue
car with white interior before.
But now, everywhere I turn, I'mseeing nothing but blue cars
with white interior.
Right Blue, tesla's white withwhite interior, and so this is
(11:33):
actually something that's calledI believe it's like the batter
mine Hoff phenomenon, and thisis something that we consider,
or is considered, to be, afrequency illusion.
It's an illusion of sorts,because in reality, nothing
changed.
There have always been bluecars with white interior on the
(11:54):
streets.
It's always been that.
We have had a number of otherblue cars out there, but because
you weren't noticing it, youthought it didn't exist.
You weren't noticing it becauseyour attention wasn't being
drawn to it.
You weren't being drawn to thatparticular car, and so it gives
you this illusion that you areexperiencing something that is
(12:18):
new and that didn't exist before.
But that's really not true.
Those cars were always there,and this is very similar to how
we approach business.
We can get in, get started andfeel like you just can't compete
.
I know, I thought that before Ijust can't compete.
The market is overcrowded,there are too many people trying
(12:40):
to do the same thing that I'mdoing, and that's just a form of
scarcity mindset.
You know, I read a statisticrecently that stated if you only
sold, only if you only sold tothe top 1% of wealthy English
speaking countries.
So this is the US, canada,australia, the United Kingdom.
(13:02):
That is, 3.6 million people, 1%.
3.6 million.
That was what I read previously, but I actually calculated the
numbers on this just for 2021.
And it is actually 4.6 millionpeople, 1%.
(13:23):
1% from a small fraction of theworld.
So I'm saying all that to saythat, yes, in most markets it is
overcrowded, definitely, witheveryone transitioning online in
the midst of the pandemic andall the changes that have
happened, you know, over thiscourse of time this is being
recorded in late 2021, just forthose who may be listening in
(13:48):
the future but with thetransition online, for most
people, it has openedopportunity, opened the doors of
opportunity for people to getstarted and to start their
businesses.
So, yes, it's going to feel likethe market is overcrowded, but
the thing is similar to thatillusion that we talked about.
That is our limiting belief.
(14:08):
That's us thinking that wecannot compete in this
overcrowded market, when themarket was always this way.
The market was this way whenyou got the business license.
The market was this way whenyou decided to start your
business and you thought it wassuch a great idea and you hadn't
seen it.
You have to remember that whatyou're feeling is a limiting
(14:31):
belief because it's an illusion.
When you have a scarcity mindset, you focus in on the challenges
.
You see the challenge ofstanding out in a crowded market
, and that doesn't near seemsimpossible, especially without a
massive marketing budget.
But what really complicatesthis picture further is that
when you don't see anybody thatlooks like you, then the market
(14:55):
actually seems even more crowdedand even more impossible to
break into, because you can'tsee another version that seems
similar to you, that has beensuccessful, and so in your mind
you begin to tell yourself thisis just not going to work.
You internalize all that ismeaning there's not enough room
(15:18):
for you to succeed, that there'snot enough room for you to
actually build the business thatyou want, that what you desire
is not available to you.
In reality, there is more thanenough room, just like I talked
about that 4.6 million people,1%, 4.6 million there are more
(15:39):
than enough clients out therefor you to serve.
There are more than enoughbusinesses for you to work with.
There is the ability for you toreally build your business.
So you have to switch thisthinking from a belief in
competition, in competing forbusiness, trying to win business
(16:01):
we talk about it all the timeas winning business.
That's very it's very common tohear that mentioned, especially
in a consulting world.
I won that contract, I won thisbusiness and technically
there's nothing, I guess youwould say wrong with using that
terminology.
But in terms of mindset, youhave to think of it differently,
because if you're thinkingabout winning that contract or
(16:21):
winning that business, you'reseeing it as a competition, and
in a competition typicallythere's one winner, and so in
your mind you're seeing scarcity, because you're thinking that
there is only one winner, onlyone person that can win the
business, only one person thatthat client can work with, and
in reality that's not true.
That client can choose to workwith multiple people, that
(16:44):
client can decide to work ondifferent things, that business
can contract with multipleconsultants.
So you have to change thismindset and really look for
instead how you can reallyconnect and collaborate with
other people, how you can beginto see that there is room for
(17:05):
you and there's room availablefor you to succeed.
This is actually more abundantthinking, and this is what will
keep you from stalling and notmoving forward, especially at
the beginning, becausepreviously you may have been
telling yourself there's no roomfor me, this is not gonna
matter, why try?
(17:25):
Because I'm not gonna be ableto succeed.
I'm not seeing any growth.
This must mean that my idea isbad.
Instead of you stalling onthoughts like that, you're
moving forward because you'refocused on if I can just get
this collaboration, if I canjust work with this one person,
if I can just partner withsomeone else, and that seems
much more feasible for you towin.
(17:48):
And so one of the things that wehave to overcome in terms of
limiting beliefs is thisscarcity mindset and thinking
that the market is too crowdedbecause it's not so.
This last limiting belief issomething that really comes from
a strength that mostconsultants have, and that is
that most consultants averageconsultant is someone who many
(18:12):
people would consider to be veryambitious, very ambitious and
to be overachievers, and that isa good thing.
That is what leads tooutperforming your peers and
what really helps you to reachthis level of expert status and
to enhance your knowledge andyour experiences.
(18:32):
But the thing to consider isthat we are often taking things
over the top, and that meansthat we're trying to make things
perfect, and, although this canbe a great thing at first
glance, it is also somethingthat can signal an area that can
be a limiting belief thatstalls our growth, that keeps us
(18:55):
from moving forward.
We believe that everything hasto be perfect before you launch.
This is an aspect ofperfectionism.
This is where perfectionismbecomes a huge obstacle, and
this limiting belief of needingperfection in order to start is
(19:18):
what keeps many people frommoving forward.
They may have started theirbusiness on paper, they may have
even done a little bit of workhere and there, but they have
oftentimes not moved forwardfully because they're not at the
place that they wanna be at.
The website isn't perfect yet.
(19:38):
You don't have the perfectcontent to post on social media.
You don't have the massivefollowing that would be perfect
for you to really put yourbusiness out there.
So you don't feel uncomfortablewhen people ask or friends see
you doing the work.
You have this perception ofperfectionism that keeps you
from growing and advancing anddefinitely keeps you from making
(20:01):
money.
So this is a huge limitingbelief.
It's this idea that we can'tmake a mistake, that we can't be
seen as being less than perfect, because that would mean that
we're not truly an expert.
It's that type of belief thatkeeps us stuck and as women,
especially women of color, wemistakenly see this imperfection
(20:24):
as evidence, sometimes, of howwe are not qualified for the job
, or how we are not truly anexpert, or how we are not at the
same level or our services areof the same caliber as our
counterparts.
It's that sense ofperfectionism, that limiting
belief, that keeps us stuck, andso overcoming this belief
(20:46):
really requires us to take thesethings that we have often seen
as standards, as examples ofwhat it means to be of high
quality, these people that we'veput up on pedestals and admired
.
We have to put those in theproper frame of reference,
(21:07):
because, in reality, thoseindividuals make mistakes too.
Those things that we're lookingat as standards are not perfect
.
None of that is perfect, andreally, this perfectionism is a
source of procrastination.
It keeps us from moving ahead.
We get locked in our heads, westart to overthink, we start
(21:28):
tinkering, we're evaluating allour options, we're constantly
studying and we're doinganything and everything else
other than taking meaningfulsteps and action to achieve our
goals, and so what that means isthat you're not building,
you're not growing, and Iunderstand because I have been
there.
I have gone through thatexperience where I've kept
myself busy working on anythingand everything other than those
(21:52):
things that are going to be tiedto me generating revenue, being
able to collaborate with otherpeople that are tied to anything
and everything but me beingable to land the contracts that
I need in order for my businessto thrive.
It's just all busy work.
It's all things that we thinkthat we need in order to show up
perfectly in the market, and itis a source of procrastination,
(22:16):
it is keeping us stuck, andthat is a belief that we have to
push against and we have tomove past.
You have to be able torecognize that, when
perfectionism is arising, thatthere is the need in that moment
to really resist thattemptation and that we have to
(22:36):
move forward with whatever we'reworking on, even if it's not
done to the level that we woulddesire.
Now, I don't mean, don't dothings in excellence.
I definitely believe that youneed to focus on excellence.
You need to be focused onquality, providing a high
quality experience, but thosetwo things are different from
things being perfect.
(22:57):
Just because something goes up,high quality, high value
doesn't make it perfect.
The knowledge that you're goingto be sharing is going to be of
high quality and high value,but it may not be perfect.
You're going to have iterationsthat are going to occur over
and over again so that you canmake it better and better as you
work with more clients.
As you go through thisexperience over time, you're
(23:18):
going to constantly improve.
It's not perfect, but it canstill be of high quality, it can
still be of high value, andthat's why you have to get
comfortable with really takingthis messy and imperfect action.
It doesn't need to be perfectfor you to start, and once you
realize that this perfectionismpiece, this need to be perfect,
(23:41):
this need to show up in acertain way it's just a source
of procrastination is keepingyou from starting, keeping you
from building, keeping you fromgrowing, then you will begin to
feel more comfortable takingthose steps, in spite of it not
being exactly the way that youwant to really get your services
and your offer out there.
People have to be able to seewhat you're able to offer.
(24:04):
In order to buy from you, inorder to request for your help,
in order to sign that contract,in order for you to convert
those prospects and leads toclients, they have to see your
services, they have to know whatyou're doing, and they can't
find that out if you are stuckin this perfectionism tailspin.
(24:26):
You have to move past that.
You have to stopprocrastinating and just get
started.
It doesn't have to be perfectwhen you start.
No one is perfect when youstart, I don't care who you look
at, no matter how big they areright now.
If you go back and scroll backthrough a lot of their older
content and how they showed upinitially in the industry, it
(24:47):
was not perfect.
That's actually an exercisethat I like to use and I have
clients use.
Go back through to the earlystages.
If they still have it up ontheir social media accounts,
which many do, scroll backthrough to the very beginning.
Look at what their contentlooked like.
Some of the biggest names inthe industry had some of the
(25:10):
clunkiest websites, some of themost disconnected and poor
content when they started, butit was the best they can do at
the time and because they didn'tallow perfectionism to get in
the way, to be their source ofprocrastination, and they
continued to move forward, theygained that clarity over time,
(25:32):
they improved over time and nowthey've achieved everything that
you're trying to achieve inyour journey.
You have the ability to go evenfurther, but you got to start
and so we have to get over thiswhole thought process, in this
perfectionism that is limitingus and keeping us in the same
place and keeping us from beingable to move forward.
(25:52):
So this limiting belief, thethird limiting belief that it
needs to be perfect, that'ssomething that we have to move
past.
These are just a few limitingbeliefs that we hold on to and
that we unknowingly allow toreally hinder our progress.
We allow these things to keepus from starting our consulting
(26:15):
business.
We allow these things to keepus from really getting our
businesses fully off the groundand growing and thriving, and we
have to get past that.
In order for you to accomplishyour goal, whatever it may be,
you have to get started, youhave to move forward and you
also have to overcome theselimiting beliefs in order to
(26:36):
successfully do so.
So in part two, we're going todive into some beliefs that can
keep us stuck in stagnant whenwe're trying to build and we're
trying to grow.
This is very different fromwhen we're starting, but they
still present themselves, theselimiting beliefs, and we are
going to find ways to overcomethem.
So you continue to reach yourgoals.
(26:59):
I want you to join me hereagain for the next episode of
the Black Girls Consult Twopodcast and I will look forward
to talking to you again soon.
Okay, take care and don'tforget to visit
(27:36):
excelaconsultingcom for moreinformation to support your
consulting journey.
Until next time, take care.
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