April 16, 2024 • 35 mins
Bleach Bros Podcast had a thriving podcast hosted by two buddies, B-Word and Jake the Hater. While the podcast folded in late 2023, they are still amazing friends.
Now that the podcast is done, we wanted to share our Patreon episodes with our audience.
"Hippo Happy Hour," was set on the premise of two buddies bantering at the local watering hole, Sal's Tavern. “The Stain Remover,” wass a satirical parody of two guys working at a radio station. B-Word and Jake host K-SALT’s flagship program, "The Stain Remover."
Bleach Bros Podcast is a B-Word Media Group podcast. B-Word Media Group is a collection of Spreaker Prime podcasts. For more information:
https://try.spreaker.com/prime-program/
For more B-Word Media Group podcasts, check out The Hateful Gnome's Music Hut, Two Guys In A Dart, Raunchy Regret Podcast, and Unfiltered Discussions.
Now that the podcast is done, we wanted to share our Patreon episodes with our audience.
"Hippo Happy Hour," was set on the premise of two buddies bantering at the local watering hole, Sal's Tavern. “The Stain Remover,” wass a satirical parody of two guys working at a radio station. B-Word and Jake host K-SALT’s flagship program, "The Stain Remover."
Bleach Bros Podcast is a B-Word Media Group podcast. B-Word Media Group is a collection of Spreaker Prime podcasts. For more information:
https://try.spreaker.com/prime-program/
For more B-Word Media Group podcasts, check out The Hateful Gnome's Music Hut, Two Guys In A Dart, Raunchy Regret Podcast, and Unfiltered Discussions.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
You're listening to. What am Ilistening to? The Stain Remover. It's
not a stand, it's a racingstripe on Salty Hippo Radio Caso B word
and here welcome into Kasault Radio.That's right, Salty Hippo's out there.
(00:47):
This is the Stain Remover with yourfavorite host, Jake the Hater, and
whoever the fuck is sitting next tome? It's bword. B word is
sitting next to you. Bward hasbeen here the entire time. I don't
really like it when you address meas whoever the fuck I am, because
you know, like Heisenberg, Iam who I fucking am? Say my
name. You're goddamn right. Whatis the be stand word? Bitch?
(01:12):
Yeah, I knew it, bigold bitch. It well, so I
almost went like I almost went withB S word for boobies and Soudi's word,
but uh but yeah, B word, B word is it. And
it's funny, dude, because likeeverybody calls me B word like I you
know, in high school and afterhigh school whatever, I was called B
word then I went years with mywith my legal name. Now everybody just
(01:34):
calls me B word. People actuallycomment on my daughter's ship and say hi,
b words kid, it's amazing.My my kids call you b word
yep. B word called you bword yep. My wife calls you Brian,
yes, yes, or bitch.Your wife is very formal with me
when she says bitch. It's verymuch like, oh, all right,
let me let me ask you this. What's your favorite whole time? The
(01:57):
time is nine thirty pm, theweather is fucking cold. What's your favorite
holiday candy? Oh? Holiday candy? That's yeah. I'm gonna go with
the hearts Valentine's hearts, Oh mygod, it was chalky, choky hearts.
Or or go with spree like thethe not the spree, the smarties
(02:19):
on Halloween. I know why youpicked the hearts because you have no self
esteem and so finally somebody giving mea compliment to yourself, you eat them
in front of a mirror. Iprobably would. I'll tell you. If
somebody sent me a bag of dicks, like the gummy dicks, I would
eat the gummy dicks. Would yourather jerk off in front of a mirror?
Poop in front of a mirror?What? I poop in front of
a mirror already? So probably poopin front of a mirror. Have you
(02:43):
ever steamed up the mirror while pooping? By the way, you what?
No? Okay, so funny storyhere. So it was like, I
don't even know how that happened.It was like five degrees outside, and
you know, just for for ventilationpurposes, I opened the window in the
bathroom and I'm fucking chilly already,and it was like three o'clock in the
morn morning or whatever, and soI have the light on in the bathroom,
which normally doesn't happen at three o'clockin the morning. But I'm sitting
(03:04):
there and I'm taking a ship.Well, my ship was so warm that
the steam from my ship came upand it and it it heased itself to
the mirror, and because the coldair was coming in, it fogged up
my mirror. It was the firsttime I've ever seen the mist of some
young fart I have. I haveno words for whea. I like it
(03:28):
when I want a commercial break justbecause of that, I just I really
need to come back, because holyship, uh, misty ship, this
is b ward. We'll be rightback with the standard rover outing. You'll
(04:08):
mad like the splason Welcome back.In. I'm here, I'm here.
(04:36):
I haven't been eating right feward Ican, I know, man, but
I am. I'm pretty surprised thatyou took your dumper like you normally do.
I think you took your dumper.You just stepped out of the stepped
out of the room normally. I'mhere starting the interview by myself because you're
a fucking asshole like that. Ohby the way, welcome down the standard
over guys, and now we're waitingon a guest. Yeah, I ran.
(05:01):
I saw three guys out there.I heard they were supposed to be
four. It didn't catch any ofthe names. Don't care. They were
wearing like Apple shirts or something.They smell like the deep friars from Applebee's
and Miller Light. It was prettythree out of the four of them,
because I did see that there werefour, But three out of the four
of them are wearing crocs and theyhave those little crock like gibbets. The
(05:24):
little gibbets those are called. Theylook like Miller Lite gibbets, and and
I can't figure out like what itis. I don't know if it's Miller
Light. I didn't get that closeto their feet but oh ship, well
here we are. This is HeyHey, Hey, this is Milt here
(05:48):
we are so hey guys, well, welcome in, you know, go
ahead and have a seat. I'mb word, this is Jake. We're
who So we got here? Who'shere? Josh, Corey, I'm Jimmy
hy Jimmy man? All right,well, welcome in, guys. What
(06:11):
do you guys call yourself? Cory? No? No? What? What's
your name? What are you?Guys? You booked the water if this
is no mcgainn er who this is? But like, what do you guys
do? Well, we're the theApple Boys and my name's Josh. Josh.
(06:33):
You better shut the fuck up,Josh. And this is my my
friends Corey and Jimmy and Rob andwe we have a podcast. And we're
followed by Miller Lyte. Oh okay, well cool, welcome in. I'm
looking at your logo and it lookslike an apple with a tap. So
(06:57):
what kind of sider do you make? Cory? I don't okay? So
is this like cider or is thisbeer? I love? I love?
I love this like this is okay? So who's the spokesperson for you guys?
Who Josh? Josh is a spokesperson. Well, Josh, are you
(07:18):
speaking about yourself and the third person, because you're talking right now, Josh
likes Applebee's. Oh god, Ohso it's not even You're not even cider,
You're you're It's about Applebee's. That'swhy you're the Apple Boys. The
only sider that we like is Dickens, but Applebee's doesn't serve it a dickensider.
(07:39):
I get it. Oh that's good. Okay, so let me okay,
what what's the story behind Applebee's then? Because that place sucks. Well,
we're the Apple Boys, not AppleBeees. But we got together to
talk and and reminisce. We allwork together. And we got together on
(07:59):
a Saturday night because Saturday's for theboys, and we went to Applebee's and
we drank Miller Lights and we talkedabout life and love and sports and cocaine.
This sounds like a new age Tamponcommercial. We're sponsored by Miller Lite,
(08:20):
but not sponsored by Miller Lite.Fuck does that mean? Cour' I
mean, yeah, I'm we're sponsoringby Tampax Pearl, but we're not sponsored
by Tampax Pearl, right, beword, We're not sponsored by Tampax pearl
at all. As a matter offact, shout out to Jerky pro use
code Bleach Bros. Five at checkoutshould you decide to do that? So,
(08:41):
are you guys a podcast or aboy band? Corey? I don't
really know what to do with that. Jake, help me out here,
buddy. I wish I would havewent poop. Yeah, I'm kind of
thinking that. I wish I wouldhave been in the bathroom trying to make
a steaming pile of dumper and saythe steam beream pile of dump. So
I will tell you, Jake,like, have you seen Jimmy's mom.
(09:05):
She's out there in the waiting room. Oh yeah, so Jimmy's mom has
a hell of a rack on her, like definite mill for the month material.
I'm Jimmy, Jimmy. It's okay, dude, We're just We're It's
fine, Jimmy. I'll be yourdaddy. Said you sound like you need
a daddy. Cory. Hell isgoing on here, Jake? I am
(09:26):
just hey, Josh, Josh,Josh. Let me ask you this.
Do your friends just say their nameson the show or do they actually have
input. I am the speaker ofApple Boys podcast, and I am the
person who communicates on behalf of allof us. Have you joined our discord?
Josh? You better shut the fuckup. Josh, you should join
our discord. I what gamble ina discord room every day? And we
(09:52):
like to share all of our socialupdates in our discord. And you guys
mentioned Jimmy's mom. We're actually introducingJimmy's mom merch that you guys should look
at if you're interested. Okay,what's the best dish at TGI Fridays?
TGI Fridays, Cory, uh TGFFriday's Jake? These are the Apple boys,
(10:18):
bro? Like what, I don'tcare, I'm doing this on purpose?
Yeah? What? What? Whatdo you like at td Fridays?
Guys? Corey? Look, dude, your fit you're turning red as an
apple. I mean, Josh lookslike he's about ready to chop down a
tree like this, this guy,hold on, hold on? Can we
can we at least get him aMiller light? Like do we have a
Miller light in the back, like, Stephanie, Stephanie, bring this guy
(10:39):
miller light, would you? Yeah? Okay, there you go. He
cracked it open. Oh my god. He he went from like whole smash
to like, look at him,he's all calm. You'd buy a computer
from this fuck Like this is great. Hey, hey, Josh, can
you butt chug faster or mouth chug? I can? I can? I
can do both at an equal pace. But it really just depends on the
(11:03):
size of the can. That's likea human centipede funnel. Your body is
for beer. It It is oneconsistent hole if you think about it.
Yes, you're getting philosophical on me. So nobody answered my TGI Friday's question.
I guess I'm gonna move on fromthat. The time is nine sixty
eight. Uh, it's nine silock, it's a nice times sixty eight.
(11:30):
Look at that. Well with Jimmy'sMom is gonna be sixty nine soon.
Jimmy's Mom is a nine nine forsixty nine. Let me tell you,
well, So boys, what canwhat can we expect h from from your
show? So, so, youguys are obviously followed by Miller Lite.
You are one of the the sixpeople followed by Miller Lte. Like,
(11:50):
I would totally like to be followedby Wendy's. I think Wendy's is a
cool like social media account, butlike what can we expect. Well,
we drink Miller Lite and we eatit Applebee's, and we relate to Best
Buy products occasionally, and we talk, we talk about things. Okay,
(12:20):
all right, Well, you know, Josh, I guess if I were
to ask you another question, right, so just to kind of just just
kind of get you going on here, right, if there was a character
faster, get you going faster?Yeah, if there was a character in
a film that you would relate tomore than anybody else, which character would
(12:43):
that be? Well, have youguys seen the movie Old School? Yeah,
yeah, I've seen it with Frankthe Tank. Yeah, I would
be Vince Vaughn's character, and Iwould have the greatest products at Stereo City,
(13:05):
and I would smoke weed with SnoopDogg and see boobies. I'm all
about boobies. Josh, that isa that is a great, great thing.
Corey totally. Yeah, good point. Good point. Well, Corey's
like if you could read brail outloud, like if somebody said, give
(13:26):
you the subtitles a braille YEA,I agree, I agree. Well,
Apple boys, it's been a pleasurehaving you guys on. I don't really
know how to close this out.Except for a fuck you and have a
nice day and we'll go from there. So with that, we'll be right
back from the stand. Rover,got you come up in my cre Welcome
(14:07):
back to the stand, Rover.That was an interesting That was an interesting
interview, man, Like, Idon't know I was boring. I don't
know if I expected more or ifI did. Yeah, I should have
pooped. Was it over the line? Though? No? But you know
what is the line? It's thewhole world gone crazy about the only one
(14:35):
right here. This week has beencrazy on Twitter? Yes, I love
and hate Twitter. Yes, it'ssort of I think how I got this
show. I don't know how yougot here? Did I did? Twitter?
Oh? Fuck? But speaking ofPoles, is Elon Musk over the
line for his Twitter polls and andwhat he's doing with Twitter. It's funny
(14:58):
you say that, because I'm goingto venture to guess that you say yes,
and I'm going to say I'm goingto say no, Why democracy at
work? Bro, Let's have thebots vote, Let's let's dig up dead
people. Let's just do it,bro, Let's do it. Absolutely.
So you think in democracy it's justbots voting, Well, yeah, democracy
it's dead people voting too, bro, Like, what's the difference. I
(15:20):
don't know. I'd rather have I'drather have a twelve year old troll vote
than a dead person. We haveMickey Mouth filling out ballots, Like,
what's the difference? Right? Like? I think that. I think Elon
Musk has done a decent job initiallytaking over Twitter. I just don't think
that this is going to be hismain gig. I think the dude's got
too many fingers and too many otherprojects and too many other women. The
dude likes to make it. Soyou're copping out saying he's not over the
(15:43):
line because he's got other projects thathe's going to go into. No,
I'm saying that he's not over theline because people are voting in polls.
Because you like polls. You're apole person. You're you're a pole person,
like you would dance on a pole, you would eat off a pole.
You like people playing with your pole, You like people clicking the poll,
you like people voted on your poll. You like the North Pole.
(16:04):
If Jack helped me off a poll, I would help Jack off a poll.
I'm just gonna put it out thatone. So yeah, poles and
I get along h no jack offCorey's pull Cory. I do think that
I here's the thing, man,I think that that that Elon Musk is
in a no win situation when itcomes to Twitter. I think that he
(16:26):
while he's he's doing his best totry to listen to the people, it's
become a marketplace of Shenanigan's. Theissue is is that the audience of Twitter
doesn't really like to hear anybody who'soutside of their echo chamber, and so
when it does come into these poles, it is kind of stupid. But
he's not over the line with it. Yes he is. It's annoying.
I don't think he'll really step down. I think I think he implements something
(16:48):
and it takes it back three secondslater because he just doesn't realize I think
he was. I think it's likeif they let me be in charge of
Twitter, like I'm a troll andit just depends on my mood at the
moment, I might like go freakit off and and ban game on Dawn,
fuck that guy, and then thenext minute let him back on,
and then I block him, andthen I unblock him, and then I
show him like you know, Imake sure, his dick picks leak and
then I do a pole on hisdick pics and then it's weak dick energy
(17:10):
and then fuck big Papa Musk.I mean, I thought he was coming
to save the day with the bigblue bird. That didn't happen. I
mean, dude, this is abig train wreck, This is a stupid
Twitter was already a mess. Justleave it as a message is do I
need to get rid of bots?No? Do I need poles all the
damn time? You already annoy mewith that crap B word. It's it's
so funny, but when you sithere and talk about poles, because when
we first started poles, it wasfor traction, like let's get traction going,
(17:33):
and you were all about that,and then you started hating poles.
So I put in in one ofthe choices fuck B word, and nobody
clicks that is number one. Likethere's always something different, And then we'll
record episodes and you're like, youshould really do a pole, we shouldigure
out who wins. So then Ido that fucking pole, and then you
bitch because I did the fucking pole. Like see that's why Twitter's over,
(17:56):
or I mean, Elon Must's overline, he's the same way as me.
He wants a pull that he doeslight bull. He goes, oh bye
by the bowl, and then he'sgonna like have a loophole of how it
to work and explain himself with someAI take. You know what, I
hope he does. You know whatI really hope he does. I hope
he creates an AI of himself andit starts running Twitter and it's just it's
just Elon two point zero running inand he's like this, iss, it's
(18:22):
it's it's it's an algorithm that Icreated and it could run Twitter. So
it's a bot that runs the bots. Holy crap. That is a genius
idea of you were like it likewhen he when he grabbed the sink and
he walked through the door, liketo let that sink in exactly? Do
you think that if he so?Have you ever seen the movie Multiplicity with
Michael Keaton? No? I lovethat movie. Okay, So do you
(18:44):
think that if he that if hecloned himself or did some sort of AI,
that it would just take on oneof his personalities? Like what?
No? I think super Tard comesout. I think it'd beat the I
touched my she touched my Peppee Steve. Guy. I think it was totally
be that it would be uh heblocked up my room. She took my
peppy Steve like it would it wouldjust be great. That movie is so
(19:07):
unrealistic. And I'm not talking aboutthe cloning. I'm talking about the the
wife want to have sex three timesin one Yeah, exactly, That's the
most I believe the cloning, andI believe in the retard. I believe
in all the other stuff, butI do not believe in the wife going.
Okay, round three, I'm inthat movie. That movie is over
the line. She's over line,the writer's over the line. Hollywood is
over the line. Fuck you knowwhat. This whole segment is over the
(19:30):
line tonight. I don't care.I said it. This is a bunch
of bull crap and this is thestan roover and we'll be right back.
Yeah, welcome back to the StandingMoover. This is b word here at
(20:03):
k Salt Radio. Jakie Baby,I did you see the news on the
whole Yeah, jak baby, didyou see the news on the whole Twitter
files? Yeah? Which we're ondate eight? Yeah, I don't know
if seven eight nine sixty nine.It doesn't really matter. But where where
I'm gonna go with this is thisis going to tie into my discharge of
the month because I think that theAlphabet Club is the discharge of the month.
(20:30):
What do you think you agree withan alphabet club? There, Alphabet
Club is the discharge of the month. Fuzzy, donkey, donkey done fun.
Here's our motherfucking discharge of the month. So what do you hate so
(20:52):
much about the Alphabet Club? Well, one, you always have to put
a plus at the end of it. There's too many members. They don't
know what's going on. I'm confusedon what bathroom they use. What are
we talking about? They're involved ineverything. Like the New Willow series came
out, let me just tell youpissed me off yeward the first opening ten
minutes they have this ginger, pale, black freckled lesbian chick who wants to
(21:17):
bang the head princess or whatever rightout the gate, and I'm like,
why why just give me midgets,give me wands, give me trolls,
don't give me the Alphabet Club plusin this show. Not that I don't
have a problem with those people,don't have a problem I like them.
I like them. You want tolive your life great? You want to
do people to butt great? Idon't care. I do not care.
But don't have to force everything intoit. How many letters are you gonna
(21:41):
have? You already have LGBTQ plus, Bro, What does that have to
do with the FBI? What doyou do to No, that's the Alphabet
Club. The Alphabet Club is theCIA and the FBI. They're fucking chit
up from a national level. Ithought we were on the same page.
No, that's a government. Probablynot the alphabet called the Alpha Club.
They keep adding letters. That's whythey call the Alpha. Fucking discharge of
(22:03):
the month is the FBI and theCIA. And you're talking about midgets.
You need to know what the alphabetClub means. Then the I R S
and the CIA, Yes, andthe FBI and the DTA and the A
N T S and the and theices and all that, so they're all
just a part of it. Thenit's government. It's governments. That's the
alphit club. B word. It'snot just one little entity. And no,
(22:26):
it's the lgbt Q plus plus.The first off, it's the two
s LGBT plus plus whatever. Butbut the thing is is that, No,
the discharge of the month is theFBI and the CIA and all of
these superior government agencies getting involved insuppressing information. On Twitter, we were
just talking about Elon yeah, andthen we were talking about the lgbt Q
(22:47):
plus people ruining Willow. I totallythought we were on the same page with
this discharge, you fuck. No, discharge of the month is Willow.
Willow is ruined. Willow is ruinedfor life. No, the FBI and
the CIA have suppressed information going backdecades to the point that JFK. His
files were set to release under Trump, they were they were pushed out,
(23:08):
they were set to release again underBiden. They've been pushed out. Dude,
we're fifty fucking plus years away fromJFK. What's in this info?
That's that's going to incriminate people.The FBI, the CIA, the ATF,
everybody, they're all fucks. They'reall the discharge of the month.
You're saying JFK was gay, Well, maybe that's in I mean, was
(23:29):
he part of the That's what don'tget you. What are you saying that
he was part of the LGBTQ plus. I don't know, man, like
he's also an Alpha club. He'sJFK. Oh fuck. You can't just
yell acronyms and just keep saying theiralphabet clubs B word. So we do.
You're a discharge, the discharge ofthe month. No, because you
didn't do didn't clarify. You saidalphabet club. And I want to go
(23:52):
off Bell Willow and you're over heretalking about JFK and conspiracy theories and who
was on the lawn and Richard Nixon'snot a crook? And whatever the else?
The hell know what going on?Did we land on the moon?
You're dischargers over the line. Ohmy god, stop you. You cannot
do this on a radio show onk Salt Radio. You can't just bring
in other segments into segments. You'returning our segments into an LGBTQ plus ad
(24:14):
you you are an Alphabet club.And I am damned if I if I'm
not getting the s CI A andthe LPI today, I hope you put
in your two weeks from the stayingroom. I would just leave now.
I'm not a plus like you.I wouldn't I would, I wouldn't block
you. I would just walk out, just want like you know, why
I go poop to get away fromyou. I don't steam up the mirror.
(24:36):
Just get out of here. You. I would put in two weeks
and I would sit here miserably fortwo weeks at LGBTQ plus your life,
Jake, I would show up toK Salt to KSL radio and just sit
here and talk for two more weeks. I just get you know what I
would do, I'd get the fuckout. ID you should just get the
fuck out. You know what else? Is an alphabet club? K Salt
and you're a fucking alphabet club rightnow. You start club. You started
(25:00):
this, You started this whole thingwith this radio. Say you got us
this gig in this crappy office witha clock that says ninety sixty eight,
no heater. Let me the gopherchewing on the wires. The floor is
leaking. It smells like an oldtuna. Can you hooked up us an
interview with these Apple boys that couldn'teven say their names? You cool,
cool, cool George? Shut up? You were just You are a discharge.
(25:25):
You are the discharge of my life. I guess we're gonna take a
break right there and come right back. Have you ever had one of those
days when nothing goes right. Youwistos bitching bad whatever it was. She
(25:49):
was bitching a bad last night.So you escape into the bathroom just to
sit there around your after you finishyour business, tile paper is gone.
It's a great day for me towhoop some bad ass. Welcome back to
(26:17):
Kay Salt Radio. That was aninteresting segment right there. I think my
co host potentially quit, which wouldmake him a discharge of the year.
That would be our discharge of theyear candidate. And so I don't really
know the subject that we're gonna gointo next because we were talking about something.
You beard, I'm back fu you. What the fuck uh? They
made me try to put in mytwo weeks, So my whole rant makes
(26:40):
no sense. And fuck this placenow, I love you again. I
can't work here, but you're you'recoming with me like jeremguire, Let's just
leave. So pig vom I gotto you, pig dude. He said
you have to put in two weeks. I didn't know that was in our
contract. Like I have, I'mrequired to give them two weeks. I
can't just walk out and leave likea man. Oh, so now you're
back. I have to be,so see how this goes. You're plus,
(27:03):
I'm not part of alabet club apologyand you know what, you know
what, in the spirit of acceptance, I accept your apology. If you
had to kiss me, where wouldyou kiss me? Right on your fucking
lips with tongue? Which par oflips? Happy? Part of this club?
You don't even know anymore? Youdon't even know do you know what?
(27:23):
Do you know what bathroom I usein this building? Any fucking one
you want, I'll bet the allgender one just to ruin it. Doesn't
that one have like the little kidlike changing station there and we don't even
allow little kids in this thing.I think it has a bi day or
that's the water fountain. I've beenusing it wrong for a while because it's
in all way too. If Australianpeople say like, good day, right
(27:47):
do British people say the day?Why does the how does it even make
sense? It doesn't? It soundeda lot better French. That was the
Corey Happy how So let's let's talkabout holidays because we're finishing this thing up
at the end of twenty twenty two. We've got k Salt Radio. This
is this is our very first timewe ended the first quarter. Whether it's
(28:11):
twenty two degrees, the weather istwenty two degrees, the weather, I'm
just getting that out there before Pigbongcomeing there. The weather's twenty two degrees
we were, Is it still nineto sixty nine outside? I have no
ideas twenty two degrees? I don'tknow either. What's your favorite holiday?
Bro? Holiday is Thanksgiving? Candyis? I'm gonna go with it.
Peeps. You're a fucking douchebag justto do it. And I like the
(28:33):
you know what, I don't evenlike the regular peeps. I like the
pink bunny peeps. You'se little pinkbunny ones. So I don't even get
the birds. I get the pinkbunny ones. The purple birds, those
aren't even point, yeah they are. They're old peepers, No peeper,
peeper people, peeper people. I'ma peeper people eater, a purple people
eater. You know what purple headedpeople purple. When I was a kid,
(28:56):
I used to call my dick misterpeepers. Why I don't get into
that before Candy, No, Ireally don't know. Like it was just
mister Peter talk to your penis.Uh I used to you're a guy that
talk to your p Yeah you did? You guy did? No friends,
you would look down and just talkto your penis. Mister mister p did
you make the dick hole talk backlike like Tommy Lee's dick and and well?
(29:18):
No, like did you squeeze itlike a little like a puppet like
it? Just like you know thoseRemember the girls had the things where they
would like, what's your favorite kindof It looked like, I don't know
what you're talking what you do withyour No? I bet you did.
I bet you if you weren't,if you weren't circumcised, would you do
that with your with your you know, extra piece of snow. I'd wave
it like an anteater. Okay,okay, I'd wave it around like an
(29:40):
hard bark. I'd actually I wouldactually recreate the show Arthur but starting my
dick keep theme song from Arthur,Like you know, he's walking down the
street and it would just be alittle But what I do is I pull
the skin down a little bit hislittle head and just be poking out.
I put little glasses on it,walk down the amazing amazing. Well,
(30:03):
well, let's let's change that subday. What are the what's the what's your
most overrated holiday? Overrated holiday?President's Day? Democracy, I mean,
I mean, all right, bankholidays are overrated holidays. Yes, Christopher
Columbus Day or Columbus Day or IndigenousPeople's Day or whatever, that is a
useless holiday. I don't care whatyou celebrate. I'm going to go back
(30:26):
to Jake and the Dingus where wesaid, fuck tax Day. Tax Day
is a fucking terrible day, butI don't necessarily consider that a holiday.
Most overrated Valentine's Day, underrated superBowl? No, they should really push
super Bowl off or like before theydecided that they wanted so many more weeks
of football, I was really hopingthat they would have the super Bowl on
(30:48):
Black Sunday, which would go intoBlack Monday, so MLK Day would be
what would be our holiday off?What if we could take a holiday and
take the most overrate, canny,the overeight holiday and they come together like
would you say, like peeps werethe new Valentine's candy. I think that
peeps would be like the first dayof summer candy corner. Peeps? What
when I fucking hate candy corn?So peeps do you like peeps? No,
(31:11):
you would eat a peep? No, I wouldn't eat them. You
should eat my mister p wouldn't eatyour dick either. I bet you tried
to eat your dick. No.But but I bet you rolled. You
rolled like I thought you. Ibet you thought you were a roly poly.
When I was in middle school,I was hoping that I did that.
I lost my ribs, like supposedlyMarilyn Manson did so that way I
can touch it with my mouth,but I never did. And and speaking
(31:32):
of how did how did the hedgehogwhat was his name? The porn guy?
How did he suck his own dick? Like that's crazy? Do you
ever hear that enough? You everheard that stand up where they were talking
about you know how he got fat? He's like, so apparently sucking dick
isn't worth worth more than a sandwich, because it's true, or six sandwiches
or eight. Then he had hehad enough people, he had enough people
making sandwiches, and then he gotsued. It's true. I don't know.
(31:52):
Man like like I I would takeI would take Columbus Day and then
make a candy for it and makeit the worst candy possible. Would you
call it? What would you callit? I'd call it little Christie's a
little Christi and I'd give him out, would I see, I would,
(32:13):
I would do like a gusher's onon Columbus Day, I would do it,
and I would I would. Iwould call it a I would call
it Columbine because it just explodes thatthat doesn't know. No, little chrissi'es
bro little Christies blow up in yourmind. Little Chrissie sounds perverted and pornographic
in like the peeper in the pedophilicnature. When I was six years calling
(32:37):
my peepers, mister peepers like therewas like you could have put a you
could have put like the the misterPeanuts hat on him like he was.
He had he had class back then. Bro, I never I never named
my dick. No. I didn'tsee a point. No, I only
point interesting. Well with that,let's take a real quick break. Give
(33:00):
a dog a bone trying to getyour bank jack, Leave a dog alone.
Boy, it's my favorite part ofthe day. Welcome back to k
s A L radio case salty information. We're about to get paid. The
day's almost over. The ship showsover I don't have to talk anymore.
(33:22):
People can listen, pay me.I don't give a crap. Get out
of here, the word you're stillhere? How are we closing this one
out? I don't know how we'reclosing it out. You never you never
told me how we're closing it out. This with with this one, we've
actually had. This one's been prettyinteresting. This one's been pretty chaotic.
If I might say, we haduh the we had We had Josh,
(33:42):
Corey, Rob and Jimmy from theApple Boys, which candidly was seemed kind
of like a worthless interview. Wehad the over the line segment where where
we disagreed on that. We alsohad had our stain remover where we both
chose the Alphabet Club but we bothdid and talk about what the Alphabet Club
was. And then Most Overrated Holiday. I think we finally had some middle
(34:05):
ground there. With Columbus Day,I tried to quit little Chrissies, little
Chrissy in your mouth like Columbine,Columbine chrissies, Columbine crazy. That's yeah.
But see now it reminds me likethat it would be spelled like c
R I S S. No.I think you gotta do it with K.
You gotta do like like Columbus Day, like like with a K.
Columbine with a K. Chrissie's witha K, and you just call it
(34:28):
triple K triple K blow ups thatI hope they're black candies like black lickorice.
Yeah, triple trip, triple tripleK black licorice. You got it.
Well with that, everybody that's thestain remover for December, check us
out next month, be on thelookout, and with that, fuck you.
J Bye, goodbye,
You're listening to. What am Ilistening to? The Stain Remover. It's
not a stand, it's a racingstripe on Salty Hippo Radio Caso B word
and here welcome into Kasault Radio.That's right, Salty Hippo's out there.
(00:47):
This is the Stain Remover with yourfavorite host, Jake the Hater, and
whoever the fuck is sitting next tome? It's bword. B word is
sitting next to you. Bward hasbeen here the entire time. I don't
really like it when you address meas whoever the fuck I am, because
you know, like Heisenberg, Iam who I fucking am? Say my
name. You're goddamn right. Whatis the be stand word? Bitch?
(01:12):
Yeah, I knew it, bigold bitch. It well, so I
almost went like I almost went withB S word for boobies and Soudi's word,
but uh but yeah, B word, B word is it. And
it's funny, dude, because likeeverybody calls me B word like I you
know, in high school and afterhigh school whatever, I was called B
word then I went years with mywith my legal name. Now everybody just
(01:34):
calls me B word. People actuallycomment on my daughter's ship and say hi,
b words kid, it's amazing.My my kids call you b word
yep. B word called you bword yep. My wife calls you Brian,
yes, yes, or bitch.Your wife is very formal with me
when she says bitch. It's verymuch like, oh, all right,
let me let me ask you this. What's your favorite whole time? The
(01:57):
time is nine thirty pm, theweather is fucking cold. What's your favorite
holiday candy? Oh? Holiday candy? That's yeah. I'm gonna go with
the hearts Valentine's hearts, Oh mygod, it was chalky, choky hearts.
Or or go with spree like thethe not the spree, the smarties
(02:19):
on Halloween. I know why youpicked the hearts because you have no self
esteem and so finally somebody giving mea compliment to yourself, you eat them
in front of a mirror. Iprobably would. I'll tell you. If
somebody sent me a bag of dicks, like the gummy dicks, I would
eat the gummy dicks. Would yourather jerk off in front of a mirror?
Poop in front of a mirror?What? I poop in front of
a mirror already? So probably poopin front of a mirror. Have you
(02:43):
ever steamed up the mirror while pooping? By the way, you what?
No? Okay, so funny storyhere. So it was like, I
don't even know how that happened.It was like five degrees outside, and
you know, just for for ventilationpurposes, I opened the window in the
bathroom and I'm fucking chilly already,and it was like three o'clock in the
morn morning or whatever, and soI have the light on in the bathroom,
which normally doesn't happen at three o'clockin the morning. But I'm sitting
(03:04):
there and I'm taking a ship.Well, my ship was so warm that
the steam from my ship came upand it and it it heased itself to
the mirror, and because the coldair was coming in, it fogged up
my mirror. It was the firsttime I've ever seen the mist of some
young fart I have. I haveno words for whea. I like it
(03:28):
when I want a commercial break justbecause of that, I just I really
need to come back, because holyship, uh, misty ship, this
is b ward. We'll be rightback with the standard rover outing. You'll
(04:08):
mad like the splason Welcome back.In. I'm here, I'm here.
(04:36):
I haven't been eating right feward Ican, I know, man, but
I am. I'm pretty surprised thatyou took your dumper like you normally do.
I think you took your dumper.You just stepped out of the stepped
out of the room normally. I'mhere starting the interview by myself because you're
a fucking asshole like that. Ohby the way, welcome down the standard
over guys, and now we're waitingon a guest. Yeah, I ran.
(05:01):
I saw three guys out there.I heard they were supposed to be
four. It didn't catch any ofthe names. Don't care. They were
wearing like Apple shirts or something.They smell like the deep friars from Applebee's
and Miller Light. It was prettythree out of the four of them,
because I did see that there werefour, But three out of the four
of them are wearing crocs and theyhave those little crock like gibbets. The
(05:24):
little gibbets those are called. Theylook like Miller Lite gibbets, and and
I can't figure out like what itis. I don't know if it's Miller
Light. I didn't get that closeto their feet but oh ship, well
here we are. This is HeyHey, Hey, this is Milt here
(05:48):
we are so hey guys, well, welcome in, you know, go
ahead and have a seat. I'mb word, this is Jake. We're
who So we got here? Who'shere? Josh, Corey, I'm Jimmy
hy Jimmy man? All right,well, welcome in, guys. What
(06:11):
do you guys call yourself? Cory? No? No? What? What's
your name? What are you?Guys? You booked the water if this
is no mcgainn er who this is? But like, what do you guys
do? Well, we're the theApple Boys and my name's Josh. Josh.
(06:33):
You better shut the fuck up,Josh. And this is my my
friends Corey and Jimmy and Rob andwe we have a podcast. And we're
followed by Miller Lyte. Oh okay, well cool, welcome in. I'm
looking at your logo and it lookslike an apple with a tap. So
(06:57):
what kind of sider do you make? Cory? I don't okay? So
is this like cider or is thisbeer? I love? I love?
I love this like this is okay? So who's the spokesperson for you guys?
Who Josh? Josh is a spokesperson. Well, Josh, are you
(07:18):
speaking about yourself and the third person, because you're talking right now, Josh
likes Applebee's. Oh god, Ohso it's not even You're not even cider,
You're you're It's about Applebee's. That'swhy you're the Apple Boys. The
only sider that we like is Dickens, but Applebee's doesn't serve it a dickensider.
(07:39):
I get it. Oh that's good. Okay, so let me okay,
what what's the story behind Applebee's then? Because that place sucks. Well,
we're the Apple Boys, not AppleBeees. But we got together to
talk and and reminisce. We allwork together. And we got together on
(07:59):
a Saturday night because Saturday's for theboys, and we went to Applebee's and
we drank Miller Lights and we talkedabout life and love and sports and cocaine.
This sounds like a new age Tamponcommercial. We're sponsored by Miller Lite,
(08:20):
but not sponsored by Miller Lite.Fuck does that mean? Cour' I
mean, yeah, I'm we're sponsoringby Tampax Pearl, but we're not sponsored
by Tampax Pearl, right, beword, We're not sponsored by Tampax pearl
at all. As a matter offact, shout out to Jerky pro use
code Bleach Bros. Five at checkoutshould you decide to do that? So,
(08:41):
are you guys a podcast or aboy band? Corey? I don't
really know what to do with that. Jake, help me out here,
buddy. I wish I would havewent poop. Yeah, I'm kind of
thinking that. I wish I wouldhave been in the bathroom trying to make
a steaming pile of dumper and saythe steam beream pile of dump. So
I will tell you, Jake,like, have you seen Jimmy's mom.
(09:05):
She's out there in the waiting room. Oh yeah, so Jimmy's mom has
a hell of a rack on her, like definite mill for the month material.
I'm Jimmy, Jimmy. It's okay, dude, We're just We're It's
fine, Jimmy. I'll be yourdaddy. Said you sound like you need
a daddy. Cory. Hell isgoing on here, Jake? I am
(09:26):
just hey, Josh, Josh,Josh. Let me ask you this.
Do your friends just say their nameson the show or do they actually have
input. I am the speaker ofApple Boys podcast, and I am the
person who communicates on behalf of allof us. Have you joined our discord?
Josh? You better shut the fuckup. Josh, you should join
our discord. I what gamble ina discord room every day? And we
(09:52):
like to share all of our socialupdates in our discord. And you guys
mentioned Jimmy's mom. We're actually introducingJimmy's mom merch that you guys should look
at if you're interested. Okay,what's the best dish at TGI Fridays?
TGI Fridays, Cory, uh TGFFriday's Jake? These are the Apple boys,
(10:18):
bro? Like what, I don'tcare, I'm doing this on purpose?
Yeah? What? What? Whatdo you like at td Fridays?
Guys? Corey? Look, dude, your fit you're turning red as an
apple. I mean, Josh lookslike he's about ready to chop down a
tree like this, this guy,hold on, hold on? Can we
can we at least get him aMiller light? Like do we have a
Miller light in the back, like, Stephanie, Stephanie, bring this guy
(10:39):
miller light, would you? Yeah? Okay, there you go. He
cracked it open. Oh my god. He he went from like whole smash
to like, look at him,he's all calm. You'd buy a computer
from this fuck Like this is great. Hey, hey, Josh, can
you butt chug faster or mouth chug? I can? I can? I
can do both at an equal pace. But it really just depends on the
(11:03):
size of the can. That's likea human centipede funnel. Your body is
for beer. It It is oneconsistent hole if you think about it.
Yes, you're getting philosophical on me. So nobody answered my TGI Friday's question.
I guess I'm gonna move on fromthat. The time is nine sixty
eight. Uh, it's nine silock, it's a nice times sixty eight.
(11:30):
Look at that. Well with Jimmy'sMom is gonna be sixty nine soon.
Jimmy's Mom is a nine nine forsixty nine. Let me tell you,
well, So boys, what canwhat can we expect h from from your
show? So, so, youguys are obviously followed by Miller Lite.
You are one of the the sixpeople followed by Miller Lte. Like,
(11:50):
I would totally like to be followedby Wendy's. I think Wendy's is a
cool like social media account, butlike what can we expect. Well,
we drink Miller Lite and we eatit Applebee's, and we relate to Best
Buy products occasionally, and we talk, we talk about things. Okay,
(12:20):
all right, Well, you know, Josh, I guess if I were
to ask you another question, right, so just to kind of just just
kind of get you going on here, right, if there was a character
faster, get you going faster?Yeah, if there was a character in
a film that you would relate tomore than anybody else, which character would
(12:43):
that be? Well, have youguys seen the movie Old School? Yeah,
yeah, I've seen it with Frankthe Tank. Yeah, I would
be Vince Vaughn's character, and Iwould have the greatest products at Stereo City,
(13:05):
and I would smoke weed with SnoopDogg and see boobies. I'm all
about boobies. Josh, that isa that is a great, great thing.
Corey totally. Yeah, good point. Good point. Well, Corey's
like if you could read brail outloud, like if somebody said, give
(13:26):
you the subtitles a braille YEA,I agree, I agree. Well,
Apple boys, it's been a pleasurehaving you guys on. I don't really
know how to close this out.Except for a fuck you and have a
nice day and we'll go from there. So with that, we'll be right
back from the stand. Rover,got you come up in my cre Welcome
(14:07):
back to the stand, Rover.That was an interesting That was an interesting
interview, man, Like, Idon't know I was boring. I don't
know if I expected more or ifI did. Yeah, I should have
pooped. Was it over the line? Though? No? But you know
what is the line? It's thewhole world gone crazy about the only one
(14:35):
right here. This week has beencrazy on Twitter? Yes, I love
and hate Twitter. Yes, it'ssort of I think how I got this
show. I don't know how yougot here? Did I did? Twitter?
Oh? Fuck? But speaking ofPoles, is Elon Musk over the
line for his Twitter polls and andwhat he's doing with Twitter. It's funny
(14:58):
you say that, because I'm goingto venture to guess that you say yes,
and I'm going to say I'm goingto say no, Why democracy at
work? Bro, Let's have thebots vote, Let's let's dig up dead
people. Let's just do it,bro, Let's do it. Absolutely.
So you think in democracy it's justbots voting, Well, yeah, democracy
it's dead people voting too, bro, Like, what's the difference. I
(15:20):
don't know. I'd rather have I'drather have a twelve year old troll vote
than a dead person. We haveMickey Mouth filling out ballots, Like,
what's the difference? Right? Like? I think that. I think Elon
Musk has done a decent job initiallytaking over Twitter. I just don't think
that this is going to be hismain gig. I think the dude's got
too many fingers and too many otherprojects and too many other women. The
dude likes to make it. Soyou're copping out saying he's not over the
(15:43):
line because he's got other projects thathe's going to go into. No,
I'm saying that he's not over theline because people are voting in polls.
Because you like polls. You're apole person. You're you're a pole person,
like you would dance on a pole, you would eat off a pole.
You like people playing with your pole, You like people clicking the poll,
you like people voted on your poll. You like the North Pole.
(16:04):
If Jack helped me off a poll, I would help Jack off a poll.
I'm just gonna put it out thatone. So yeah, poles and
I get along h no jack offCorey's pull Cory. I do think that
I here's the thing, man,I think that that that Elon Musk is
in a no win situation when itcomes to Twitter. I think that he
(16:26):
while he's he's doing his best totry to listen to the people, it's
become a marketplace of Shenanigan's. Theissue is is that the audience of Twitter
doesn't really like to hear anybody who'soutside of their echo chamber, and so
when it does come into these poles, it is kind of stupid. But
he's not over the line with it. Yes he is. It's annoying.
I don't think he'll really step down. I think I think he implements something
(16:48):
and it takes it back three secondslater because he just doesn't realize I think
he was. I think it's likeif they let me be in charge of
Twitter, like I'm a troll andit just depends on my mood at the
moment, I might like go freakit off and and ban game on Dawn,
fuck that guy, and then thenext minute let him back on,
and then I block him, andthen I unblock him, and then I
show him like you know, Imake sure, his dick picks leak and
then I do a pole on hisdick pics and then it's weak dick energy
(17:10):
and then fuck big Papa Musk.I mean, I thought he was coming
to save the day with the bigblue bird. That didn't happen. I
mean, dude, this is abig train wreck, This is a stupid
Twitter was already a mess. Justleave it as a message is do I
need to get rid of bots?No? Do I need poles all the
damn time? You already annoy mewith that crap B word. It's it's
so funny, but when you sithere and talk about poles, because when
we first started poles, it wasfor traction, like let's get traction going,
(17:33):
and you were all about that,and then you started hating poles.
So I put in in one ofthe choices fuck B word, and nobody
clicks that is number one. Likethere's always something different, And then we'll
record episodes and you're like, youshould really do a pole, we shouldigure
out who wins. So then Ido that fucking pole, and then you
bitch because I did the fucking pole. Like see that's why Twitter's over,
(17:56):
or I mean, Elon Must's overline, he's the same way as me.
He wants a pull that he doeslight bull. He goes, oh bye
by the bowl, and then he'sgonna like have a loophole of how it
to work and explain himself with someAI take. You know what, I
hope he does. You know whatI really hope he does. I hope
he creates an AI of himself andit starts running Twitter and it's just it's
just Elon two point zero running inand he's like this, iss, it's
(18:22):
it's it's it's an algorithm that Icreated and it could run Twitter. So
it's a bot that runs the bots. Holy crap. That is a genius
idea of you were like it likewhen he when he grabbed the sink and
he walked through the door, liketo let that sink in exactly? Do
you think that if he so?Have you ever seen the movie Multiplicity with
Michael Keaton? No? I lovethat movie. Okay, So do you
(18:44):
think that if he that if hecloned himself or did some sort of AI,
that it would just take on oneof his personalities? Like what?
No? I think super Tard comesout. I think it'd beat the I
touched my she touched my Peppee Steve. Guy. I think it was totally
be that it would be uh heblocked up my room. She took my
peppy Steve like it would it wouldjust be great. That movie is so
(19:07):
unrealistic. And I'm not talking aboutthe cloning. I'm talking about the the
wife want to have sex three timesin one Yeah, exactly, That's the
most I believe the cloning, andI believe in the retard. I believe
in all the other stuff, butI do not believe in the wife going.
Okay, round three, I'm inthat movie. That movie is over
the line. She's over line,the writer's over the line. Hollywood is
over the line. Fuck you knowwhat. This whole segment is over the
(19:30):
line tonight. I don't care.I said it. This is a bunch
of bull crap and this is thestan roover and we'll be right back.
Yeah, welcome back to the StandingMoover. This is b word here at
(20:03):
k Salt Radio. Jakie Baby,I did you see the news on the
whole Yeah, jak baby, didyou see the news on the whole Twitter
files? Yeah? Which we're ondate eight? Yeah, I don't know
if seven eight nine sixty nine.It doesn't really matter. But where where
I'm gonna go with this is thisis going to tie into my discharge of
the month because I think that theAlphabet Club is the discharge of the month.
(20:30):
What do you think you agree withan alphabet club? There, Alphabet
Club is the discharge of the month. Fuzzy, donkey, donkey done fun.
Here's our motherfucking discharge of the month. So what do you hate so
(20:52):
much about the Alphabet Club? Well, one, you always have to put
a plus at the end of it. There's too many members. They don't
know what's going on. I'm confusedon what bathroom they use. What are
we talking about? They're involved ineverything. Like the New Willow series came
out, let me just tell youpissed me off yeward the first opening ten
minutes they have this ginger, pale, black freckled lesbian chick who wants to
(21:17):
bang the head princess or whatever rightout the gate, and I'm like,
why why just give me midgets,give me wands, give me trolls,
don't give me the Alphabet Club plusin this show. Not that I don't
have a problem with those people,don't have a problem I like them.
I like them. You want tolive your life great? You want to
do people to butt great? Idon't care. I do not care.
But don't have to force everything intoit. How many letters are you gonna
(21:41):
have? You already have LGBTQ plus, Bro, What does that have to
do with the FBI? What doyou do to No, that's the Alphabet
Club. The Alphabet Club is theCIA and the FBI. They're fucking chit
up from a national level. Ithought we were on the same page.
No, that's a government. Probablynot the alphabet called the Alpha Club.
They keep adding letters. That's whythey call the Alpha. Fucking discharge of
(22:03):
the month is the FBI and theCIA. And you're talking about midgets.
You need to know what the alphabetClub means. Then the I R S
and the CIA, Yes, andthe FBI and the DTA and the A
N T S and the and theices and all that, so they're all
just a part of it. Thenit's government. It's governments. That's the
alphit club. B word. It'snot just one little entity. And no,
(22:26):
it's the lgbt Q plus plus.The first off, it's the two
s LGBT plus plus whatever. Butbut the thing is is that, No,
the discharge of the month is theFBI and the CIA and all of
these superior government agencies getting involved insuppressing information. On Twitter, we were
just talking about Elon yeah, andthen we were talking about the lgbt Q
(22:47):
plus people ruining Willow. I totallythought we were on the same page with
this discharge, you fuck. No, discharge of the month is Willow.
Willow is ruined. Willow is ruinedfor life. No, the FBI and
the CIA have suppressed information going backdecades to the point that JFK. His
files were set to release under Trump, they were they were pushed out,
(23:08):
they were set to release again underBiden. They've been pushed out. Dude,
we're fifty fucking plus years away fromJFK. What's in this info?
That's that's going to incriminate people.The FBI, the CIA, the ATF,
everybody, they're all fucks. They'reall the discharge of the month.
You're saying JFK was gay, Well, maybe that's in I mean, was
(23:29):
he part of the That's what don'tget you. What are you saying that
he was part of the LGBTQ plus. I don't know, man, like
he's also an Alpha club. He'sJFK. Oh fuck. You can't just
yell acronyms and just keep saying theiralphabet clubs B word. So we do.
You're a discharge, the discharge ofthe month. No, because you
didn't do didn't clarify. You saidalphabet club. And I want to go
(23:52):
off Bell Willow and you're over heretalking about JFK and conspiracy theories and who
was on the lawn and Richard Nixon'snot a crook? And whatever the else?
The hell know what going on?Did we land on the moon?
You're dischargers over the line. Ohmy god, stop you. You cannot
do this on a radio show onk Salt Radio. You can't just bring
in other segments into segments. You'returning our segments into an LGBTQ plus ad
(24:14):
you you are an Alphabet club.And I am damned if I if I'm
not getting the s CI A andthe LPI today, I hope you put
in your two weeks from the stayingroom. I would just leave now.
I'm not a plus like you.I wouldn't I would, I wouldn't block
you. I would just walk out, just want like you know, why
I go poop to get away fromyou. I don't steam up the mirror.
(24:36):
Just get out of here. You. I would put in two weeks
and I would sit here miserably fortwo weeks at LGBTQ plus your life,
Jake, I would show up toK Salt to KSL radio and just sit
here and talk for two more weeks. I just get you know what I
would do, I'd get the fuckout. ID you should just get the
fuck out. You know what else? Is an alphabet club? K Salt
and you're a fucking alphabet club rightnow. You start club. You started
(25:00):
this, You started this whole thingwith this radio. Say you got us
this gig in this crappy office witha clock that says ninety sixty eight,
no heater. Let me the gopherchewing on the wires. The floor is
leaking. It smells like an oldtuna. Can you hooked up us an
interview with these Apple boys that couldn'teven say their names? You cool,
cool, cool George? Shut up? You were just You are a discharge.
(25:25):
You are the discharge of my life. I guess we're gonna take a
break right there and come right back. Have you ever had one of those
days when nothing goes right. Youwistos bitching bad whatever it was. She
(25:49):
was bitching a bad last night.So you escape into the bathroom just to
sit there around your after you finishyour business, tile paper is gone.
It's a great day for me towhoop some bad ass. Welcome back to
(26:17):
Kay Salt Radio. That was aninteresting segment right there. I think my
co host potentially quit, which wouldmake him a discharge of the year.
That would be our discharge of theyear candidate. And so I don't really
know the subject that we're gonna gointo next because we were talking about something.
You beard, I'm back fu you. What the fuck uh? They
made me try to put in mytwo weeks, So my whole rant makes
(26:40):
no sense. And fuck this placenow, I love you again. I
can't work here, but you're you'recoming with me like jeremguire, Let's just
leave. So pig vom I gotto you, pig dude. He said
you have to put in two weeks. I didn't know that was in our
contract. Like I have, I'mrequired to give them two weeks. I
can't just walk out and leave likea man. Oh, so now you're
back. I have to be,so see how this goes. You're plus,
(27:03):
I'm not part of alabet club apologyand you know what, you know
what, in the spirit of acceptance, I accept your apology. If you
had to kiss me, where wouldyou kiss me? Right on your fucking
lips with tongue? Which par oflips? Happy? Part of this club?
You don't even know anymore? Youdon't even know do you know what?
(27:23):
Do you know what bathroom I usein this building? Any fucking one
you want, I'll bet the allgender one just to ruin it. Doesn't
that one have like the little kidlike changing station there and we don't even
allow little kids in this thing.I think it has a bi day or
that's the water fountain. I've beenusing it wrong for a while because it's
in all way too. If Australianpeople say like, good day, right
(27:47):
do British people say the day?Why does the how does it even make
sense? It doesn't? It soundeda lot better French. That was the
Corey Happy how So let's let's talkabout holidays because we're finishing this thing up
at the end of twenty twenty two. We've got k Salt Radio. This
is this is our very first timewe ended the first quarter. Whether it's
(28:11):
twenty two degrees, the weather istwenty two degrees, the weather, I'm
just getting that out there before Pigbongcomeing there. The weather's twenty two degrees
we were, Is it still nineto sixty nine outside? I have no
ideas twenty two degrees? I don'tknow either. What's your favorite holiday?
Bro? Holiday is Thanksgiving? Candyis? I'm gonna go with it.
Peeps. You're a fucking douchebag justto do it. And I like the
(28:33):
you know what, I don't evenlike the regular peeps. I like the
pink bunny peeps. You'se little pinkbunny ones. So I don't even get
the birds. I get the pinkbunny ones. The purple birds, those
aren't even point, yeah they are. They're old peepers, No peeper,
peeper people, peeper people. I'ma peeper people eater, a purple people
eater. You know what purple headedpeople purple. When I was a kid,
(28:56):
I used to call my dick misterpeepers. Why I don't get into
that before Candy, No, Ireally don't know. Like it was just
mister Peter talk to your penis.Uh I used to you're a guy that
talk to your p Yeah you did? You guy did? No friends,
you would look down and just talkto your penis. Mister mister p did
you make the dick hole talk backlike like Tommy Lee's dick and and well?
(29:18):
No, like did you squeeze itlike a little like a puppet like
it? Just like you know thoseRemember the girls had the things where they
would like, what's your favorite kindof It looked like, I don't know
what you're talking what you do withyour No? I bet you did.
I bet you if you weren't,if you weren't circumcised, would you do
that with your with your you know, extra piece of snow. I'd wave
it like an anteater. Okay,okay, I'd wave it around like an
(29:40):
hard bark. I'd actually I wouldactually recreate the show Arthur but starting my
dick keep theme song from Arthur,Like you know, he's walking down the
street and it would just be alittle But what I do is I pull
the skin down a little bit hislittle head and just be poking out.
I put little glasses on it,walk down the amazing amazing. Well,
(30:03):
well, let's let's change that subday. What are the what's the what's your
most overrated holiday? Overrated holiday?President's Day? Democracy, I mean,
I mean, all right, bankholidays are overrated holidays. Yes, Christopher
Columbus Day or Columbus Day or IndigenousPeople's Day or whatever, that is a
useless holiday. I don't care whatyou celebrate. I'm going to go back
(30:26):
to Jake and the Dingus where wesaid, fuck tax Day. Tax Day
is a fucking terrible day, butI don't necessarily consider that a holiday.
Most overrated Valentine's Day, underrated superBowl? No, they should really push
super Bowl off or like before theydecided that they wanted so many more weeks
of football, I was really hopingthat they would have the super Bowl on
(30:48):
Black Sunday, which would go intoBlack Monday, so MLK Day would be
what would be our holiday off?What if we could take a holiday and
take the most overrate, canny,the overeight holiday and they come together like
would you say, like peeps werethe new Valentine's candy. I think that
peeps would be like the first dayof summer candy corner. Peeps? What
when I fucking hate candy corn?So peeps do you like peeps? No,
(31:11):
you would eat a peep? No, I wouldn't eat them. You
should eat my mister p wouldn't eatyour dick either. I bet you tried
to eat your dick. No.But but I bet you rolled. You
rolled like I thought you. Ibet you thought you were a roly poly.
When I was in middle school,I was hoping that I did that.
I lost my ribs, like supposedlyMarilyn Manson did so that way I
can touch it with my mouth,but I never did. And and speaking
(31:32):
of how did how did the hedgehogwhat was his name? The porn guy?
How did he suck his own dick? Like that's crazy? Do you
ever hear that enough? You everheard that stand up where they were talking
about you know how he got fat? He's like, so apparently sucking dick
isn't worth worth more than a sandwich, because it's true, or six sandwiches
or eight. Then he had hehad enough people, he had enough people
making sandwiches, and then he gotsued. It's true. I don't know.
(31:52):
Man like like I I would takeI would take Columbus Day and then
make a candy for it and makeit the worst candy possible. Would you
call it? What would you callit? I'd call it little Christie's a
little Christi and I'd give him out, would I see, I would,
(32:13):
I would do like a gusher's onon Columbus Day, I would do it,
and I would I would. Iwould call it a I would call
it Columbine because it just explodes thatthat doesn't know. No, little chrissi'es
bro little Christies blow up in yourmind. Little Chrissie sounds perverted and pornographic
in like the peeper in the pedophilicnature. When I was six years calling
(32:37):
my peepers, mister peepers like therewas like you could have put a you
could have put like the the misterPeanuts hat on him like he was.
He had he had class back then. Bro, I never I never named
my dick. No. I didn'tsee a point. No, I only
point interesting. Well with that,let's take a real quick break. Give
(33:00):
a dog a bone trying to getyour bank jack, Leave a dog alone.
Boy, it's my favorite part ofthe day. Welcome back to k
s A L radio case salty information. We're about to get paid. The
day's almost over. The ship showsover I don't have to talk anymore.
(33:22):
People can listen, pay me.I don't give a crap. Get out
of here, the word you're stillhere? How are we closing this one
out? I don't know how we'reclosing it out. You never you never
told me how we're closing it out. This with with this one, we've
actually had. This one's been prettyinteresting. This one's been pretty chaotic.
If I might say, we haduh the we had We had Josh,
(33:42):
Corey, Rob and Jimmy from theApple Boys, which candidly was seemed kind
of like a worthless interview. Wehad the over the line segment where where
we disagreed on that. We alsohad had our stain remover where we both
chose the Alphabet Club but we bothdid and talk about what the Alphabet Club
was. And then Most Overrated Holiday. I think we finally had some middle
(34:05):
ground there. With Columbus Day,I tried to quit little Chrissies, little
Chrissy in your mouth like Columbine,Columbine chrissies, Columbine crazy. That's yeah.
But see now it reminds me likethat it would be spelled like c
R I S S. No.I think you gotta do it with K.
You gotta do like like Columbus Day, like like with a K.
Columbine with a K. Chrissie's witha K, and you just call it
(34:28):
triple K triple K blow ups thatI hope they're black candies like black lickorice.
Yeah, triple trip, triple tripleK black licorice. You got it.
Well with that, everybody that's thestain remover for December, check us
out next month, be on thelookout, and with that, fuck you.
J Bye, goodbye,
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