Blended Life - A Blended Family Podcast

Blended Life - A Blended Family Podcast

A blended family is such an important topic because it’s dealing with so many lives, not just that of you and your spouse. You have your kids and your spouses kids of course, but you also have the other sets of parents to contend with (if there is shared custody). With so many cooks in the kitchen, it can make sanity hard to come by on some days. We can lose our way in the midst of chaos, jealousy, insecurity, frustration, anger, confusion, miscommunication, and power struggles. This podcast is dedicated to lessons my husband and I have learned from previously being married, divorced, parenting, co-parenting, step-parenting, blending a family, re-marrying, surviving daddy issues (me not him lol), going through years of therapy (again, me not him ha), having a relationship with God, listening to and absorbing wisdom from others, and having some of the best friends anyone could hope for! It is our hope that this offers all who take the time to read what we have to say, a perspective that makes for consideration or just some good-old-fashioned food-for-thought. If we can save one person, or couple, from any of our many mistakes, it would mean more than any treasure ever could.

Episodes

April 29, 2021 78 min

?How to know when to step back and let go of trying to grasp for control as a step parent? When your nature is to help out, but then you find yourself regretting it... When your children notice different treatment between his and hers kids in the home, how do you address that? How do you repair the breakdown of your relationship with your child and your spouse because of this situation? How to deal with being the outcast in your si...

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 How to handle your child being baptized without your knowing; even with a court order in place that states both parents need to agree on religious practices?! When your ex is a bully and tries to manipulate every situation to cause distance and drama in your child’s life and this in your blended family life; how do you navigate that when enough is enough?? Should you address how your ex is dressed when they show up to pick up the ...

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 How to communicate with your spouse when they are seemingly speaking a totally different language? When your spouse has no time for you because every free minute is with their child, how do you cope when there’s no alone time in your marriage? How to handle the other home manipulating the kids and turning them against you and your household? What can you do? How to put the pieces back together when your spouse has moved out and pr...

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 1. How do you mentally deal with family members that do not accept the idea of a blended family? 2. What do you do when your significant other decides to put off life plans you’ve made together (such as having children together) seemingly out of nowhere and because of their kids? 3. When your child pushes away or gives your fiancé a hard time on purpose, what do you do? What do you say? 4. How to help and support a child in therap...

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 1. How does a step parent disconnect from a situation when they are very much in the mix between the exes? As a spouse do you be there solely for support and say nothing when you are dragged into fights, texts and when you disagree with their approach 💯 of the time?! 2. Is it normal for a step mom to get her feelings hurt when the step daughter does something with her bio mom that was planned for them to do together? Small...

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 What are with all the attitude shifts surrounding remarriage and going back and forth between two homes that children in blended family’s put on display? How do we as parents handle it? What should be addressed and what should be ignored? Helping the kids realize that each member of the family is unique! How to help grow respect and honor for one another’s styles, body types, abilities, limitations, hobbies, interests and personal...

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 On this episode we will discuss: 1. How do you help your child get over trust issues and become comfortable with your new significant other? Childhood trauma can most definitely affect how they do and react to relationships of all kinds moving forward. 2. How to deal with your step kid not wanting anything to do with you; not acknowledging you in your own home. Should feeling awkward become something to accept? Attitude struggles ...

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 What IS a marriage in a blended family? How do you define it? What does it look like and mean? How much is shared? How much say does each other have? How is the line drawn between shared parenting of all children and the bio parent having the final say? How does “having the bio parent having the final say” VS “our home, we both have a say” work? OR how are they separate? Lines blur in blended families and that can get confusing an...

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 When the new “girlfriend” of your ex comes in like a wrecking ball and changes everything about your co-parenting with her influence and boundaries, how should you handle it? How to deal when your kids are all over her social media and you’ve never even met her yet?! How to process your ex forging a relationship with your estranged father between him and your children? When you hear from your kids they have been seeing “grandpa” a...

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February 18, 2021 67 min

 How to deal with being on the outside of issues and decisions as the step parent; especially when it will affect you and your kids? How does a couple navigate one partner being accepting of the the other partners kid and spending alone time with them while the other partner doesn’t spend alone time with you and your kids, unless he has his kid? What to do when your step child is causing a wedge in your relationship by they way the...

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 Ways to communicate and keep each other (you and your spouse) in the loop when it comes to the kids, their schedules and happenings between the two homes. Is being in a group text with the ex a good idea?  Should schedule changes be discussed in house before being agreed to with the other?  How should you address your spouse when they forget to inform you of things concerning their children on a regular basis? When your ex refuses...

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 Jealousy that exists of the step parent and the relationship his or her significant other has with their bio kid; how to help put that jealousy to bed. Feeling like you have a gag order when the kids are around; feeling like you have to walk on egg shells until they leave to go to their other parents house; something to change or something to accept? Is it fair to combine finances after marriage if only one person has kids in the ...

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 Is it strange that the step mom hasn’t met the bio mom after two years? Why might the bio mom not want to meet the person who is caring for her child half the time? Should this be addressed or left alone? How to manage the inevitable inequality in the home when the bio parent allows their own child to get away with so much and hammers down on their step kids instead? How to handle it when said child becomes disruptive and a bully ...

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 Tonight we will be joined by our good friend Brooke @stories_of_a_bonus_parent (you’ve probably seen her in our chats). She’s a #bonusmom of twin girls, girlfriend to their Dad, a social worker, #breastcancersurvivor and a God seeking woman. She’s learning how to define her own #blendedfamily life in a way that honors her values, beliefs and needs, which is both inspiring and empowering. Brooke’s story isn’t one that you are g...

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 Question from a listener: “The #ex wants to meet me and I don’t think it’s necessary. My boyfriend thinks it will get her off his back since her reasoning is “she wants to know who her child is spending so much time with”, but I think we all know why she wants to meet me, to size me up. What are your thoughts? Should we meet?” Question from a listener: “I am wondering if you can share some more insight on the #insecurities between...

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 How to you help your significant other not feel guilty for living with/seeing your kids more than his own? Stepping in or stepping back?! When you feel like you’re doing too much parenting in your step kids lives, but also feel like if you don’t, no one else will. How does not being an “active” parent affect your marriage?! 😳😳 How do you handle grief given the fact that almost everyone in a blended family is there ...

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December 17, 2020 70 min

Do you ever truly trust the #stepparent in the home?  Do you trust their judgement or do you feel like you need to leave them with a ton of direction?  Do you micromanage your partner when it comes to your kids?!  If so, how’s that working out?
    Let’s talk about gifting your ex during the holidays, birthdays, special occasions, etc.  What about when the gifts are from the “kids” verses when they are from you?  How does either imp...

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December 10, 2020 74 min

 How to stop the fighting and arguing in your #marriage over how your spouse treats your child. How to protect your son or daughter when their feelings are hurt over the difference in treatment between them and their step siblings. When your spouse is more of a friend than a #parent to their child; should this be a red flag for having children of your own with them? Should #non-custodial parents help pay for big ticket items for th...

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 How to navigate life when your boyfriend doesn’t want to get married but expects the husband treatment.
 How to effectively communicate with your spouse when they overreact, get offended and turn the situation back around on you?
 Let’s talk more about why parents treat their step kids differently than there own.
 What’s all this about “Nacho Kids” approach to parenting in a blended family? How to know if it could be for you!

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November 19, 2020 57 min

This episode is all about the dreaded EX!  Listeners emailed us questions this week asking for insight about being the new partner/stepparent and still having a very present ex in the picture.  The following are topics we cover on this podcast:

  • Would you (Eric) marry the current version of your ex-wife, given how you work together now?  Why or why not.
  • When Eric alludes to the ex always being in his life (always will be in contact wi...
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