June 13, 2025 • 24 mins
At a party last week, someone asked what I do for a living…which led to them asking a second question. “What is the thing that gets in the way most, when people are trying to make an idea real?”
What an amazing question. In this week’s episode, I’ll share the top six reasons that people fail at making their ideas into real things, and I’ll share a solution for each one to help you turn the obstacle that’s in your way, into a strategy for success. We’ll even do a deep dive into strategy #2, and help you understand the deeper why behind creating goals that are measurable and realistic.
Did you know that we are 65% more likely to achieve our dreams with a coach or group to be accountable to, and that number jumps to a whopping 95% when we have regular check-ins and meetings with them. (Did you know that Bloom Room meets once a week?) Get over here and do the thang with us!
What you’ll learn in this episode:
- The top six things that get in the way of people making their ideas into real things
- Five new takes on an old way of goal setting
- How gratitude is productive and efficient
- What it means to fail ahead of time
- How nostalgia for now can save you from missing your life, AND can create the urgency you need to act on the ideas in your pocket
- The best tool to keep on track when life gets in the way
- How a learner’s mind is the most advanced tool in your belt
Mentioned on this episode:
- Eacon
How to connect with Marie:
- On the Web | The Local Bloom
- Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
- All Things Marie on LinkTree
JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's Hello, everybody andwelcome to episode number 131 of
(00:33):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
So last episode, I shared anepisode called Rad Women, and it
was all about this incrediblepopulation of women that is
alive right now, living throughtheir middle decades, and how
wildly spectacular these womenare in very specific ways, and I
(00:55):
share my theory about whythey're this way and what a
beautiful moment in time we areliving in, what we have to learn
from them.
So go back and listen to that,whether you are a rad woman
yourself or not.
Go listen to it so you canlearn about these rad women.
And at that party I was sittingoutside.
Well, one of the things that'sin that episode is a party that
(01:18):
I went to and the rad women thatwere there, but these women
have been around all over theplace for my last year, but
specifically at that celebration, which was an annual 50th
birthday party how cool is thatI sat around a fire with another
couple that I was talking to,one of which was a rad woman,
(01:38):
and she was sitting there withher partner.
They're from the Bay Area andwe were having a beautiful
discussion myself, this coupleand my best friend from
kindergarten.
She and I were both therewearing the exact same outfit.
Can you believe that?
We didn't plan it?
We just showed up in the exactsame outfit and so we're sitting
around this fire, we'regiggling, we're chatting, we are
(02:01):
sharing stories, getting toknow each other, and the
gentleman there that we weretalking to said so what do you
do?
And I shared it with him, whatI do.
And he said well, tell me, whatis the number one thing that
gets in people's way when theyare trying to turn their idea
(02:22):
into a real thing?
And I paused and I watched likethat orange, orange firelight
flicker on his face and on thelandscaping, the plants that
were around him and on thestones around the fireplace, and
it was like dark, it was lateat night, with this orange
(02:43):
flickering fire, and I justthought about all of my clients,
I thought about all of you andI shared with him the top things
, couple of the top things thatI see getting in people's way,
and they are really crystalclear in my mind.
(03:03):
When he asked me this, which,of course, I ask myself this
question at different times andin different ways as I'm
preparing to teach, as I'mcoaching the bloom room, as I'm
working with a client, I thinkabout what's getting in their
way, but it's so interesting tojust be out in the wild and have
someone ask me this questionand see where my brain goes.
It was crystal clear what getsin people's way.
(03:28):
I have been doing this work for20 years 15 years through
leading an organization where wewere helping educators and kids
and administrators and leadersto turn ideas into real things.
And now, five or six yearsrunning my own business helping
people turn their ideas intoreal things through using the
(03:51):
tools of cognitive reframing,hypnosis and design thinking to
help people do this, and theprimary tool of community to
help people do this.
It was crystal, crystal clear.
So today I am going to sharethe six things that get in the
way of people turning theirideas into real things, and then
we're going to zoom in on thesecond to last and give you a
(04:16):
new take on an old tool aroundgoal setting.
So number six in the things thatget in people's way as they try
to make their ideas into realthings is they don't have enough
(04:37):
boundaries.
They are trying to doeverything Instead of focusing
in on the one idea that theywant to make real and
prioritizing it over everythingelse, or prioritizing it in ways
that will work over the otherthings that are also headliners
(04:58):
in their life.
Like for me, if I have an ideathat I want to make real, it has
to weave together and flow withmy family life, with my husband
, with my close friendships,with my need for exercise, with
the things that I love to do.
It has to flow among thosethings and it also has to be
(05:19):
prioritized, because what I seepeople do is, when they don't
prioritize it, their energy goesto all of the other things that
are asking for the resource oftheir time and attention.
These other things are otherpeople's favors, are other
people's requests, they areother people's priorities.
(05:42):
Other people will use our timeand our attention and the
resource of our time and ourattention and our energy.
If we don't use them ourselves.
What happens in that case is weget depleted by giving of
ourselves, giving ourselves toeveryone around us, and there
are parts of that that feel goodand there are parts that don't.
(06:06):
When we are constantly givingto everyone else's priorities.
We are not living in aregenerative way, where we're
giving.
We are deciding intentionallywhat the most important thing is
that we give our attention tofocusing in on that thing and
making sure that it isreciprocal, so we're getting
energy back from it.
(06:26):
So they're not giving enough oftheir time and attention to the
thing that is the idea thatthey're trying to make real.
So number six is not enoughboundaries.
Number five is not enoughgratitude that gets in people's
way.
What I mean is that we thinkthat we have forever, we think
(06:48):
we have unlimited time with thepeople in our lives, the places
where we spend time, the agethat we're at, the body, that we
have the face, that we have thebrain, that we have the health
that we have right now.
We take for granted what wehave right now and then it's
(07:15):
gone and then we're nostalgicfor it.
This also happens with ideas.
We think we have all the timein the world to make our ideas
real and we don't, for a coupleof different reasons.
Number one time passes by, andwhen we go back to our sixth
reason, which is we give ourenergy to all kinds of other
things, when we are giving ourattention and time to other
(07:37):
things.
Our time is taken and timepasses by, and so we don't ever
make an idea real because we'veput it off and put it off and
deferred it until later.
We've never made it theheadliner, we've never made it
the priority.
But secondly is ideas sometimeshave a life spark.
(07:58):
They are like living things.
It's like they're floatingaround and they come to us and
we're inspired by ideas and wehave to grab them when they're
there.
I cannot tell you how manytimes I've had an idea for a
podcast or an email or a groupor a book or one of my many
(08:21):
creations and I've written itdown and I've thought it was
going to be fresh as daisy.
When I came back to it laterand I look at my notes later and
I'm like nah, I'm not feelingit.
That idea is gone, it floatedaway from me and that, of course
, is the sort of likeinspiration for the idea.
To me it is the life of theidea.
(08:41):
Sometimes the time runs out onour ideas because the life runs
out of them.
They just leave us, they're notinspirational to us anymore.
But also sometimes ideas have atemporality in that like the
people, the other people thatwould be involved in making the
idea real are here right now butthey won't be here forever.
(09:03):
In making the idea real, orhere right now but they won't be
here forever.
Or the time and place.
I've heard a couple of peoplesay I was the first one ever to
have the idea for a taco truck,but now everybody's doing it.
There's also that temporalityright Like we might have an idea
and then the market is rightand the world is right and we
wait too long and it doesn'treally fit the world anymore.
(09:26):
So that's number five is notenough gratitude for where we
are, for the people that we'rewith, for the idea that we have
in front of us.
And I call it gratitude becauseI'm saying like really feeling
like this is a once everhappening thing that's right in
front of us.
But the other reason I saygratitude is because when we are
(09:50):
in the middle of turning anidea into a real thing, the more
grateful we are for every stageof that process, whether it's
this person that we have infront of us right now, the place
that we're in our age, our body, our face, our voice, our
health, the idea we're workingon, the part of the process that
we're in our age, our body, ourface, our voice, our health,
the idea we're working on thepart of the process that we're
in turning that idea into a realthing.
(10:12):
The more gratitude we have forevery second of it, the more
likely we are to make that ideareal.
The healthier our body is, thebetter our life is.
You can never have too muchgratitude.
So, number five not enoughgratitude.
(10:32):
Number four they lose theirmomentum.
I see this happen all the time.
People start with high levelsof motivation and high levels of
confidence when they startgoing into making an idea real.
The natural arc of this is thatis stage one.
Stage two is a plummetdownwards into a valley where
(10:53):
you lose motivation and you loseconfidence because you start to
understand all the things thatyou don't know.
And then there's a steady climbwhere you're building
confidence and buildingmotivation and momentum as you
learn and as you try and failand learn from it, as you take
steps and see your progress,until ultimately you have more
(11:17):
motivation, more confidence thanwhere you started.
But it's a journey.
So people start with highmotivation and then, when they
inevitably lose motivation atsome point and lose confidence
because they experienced theirfirst fail, or they find out how
much they don't know, then theyquit.
And when they're in the bloomroom they don't, and when
(11:37):
they're my client they don't.
But a lot of times out in theworld that is when people quit.
That is one thing.
And when people one of thethings that happens when they
take that dip into lowmotivation and low confidence is
that they realize that life isgoing to keep happening.
So we go into something withhigh motivation, making it our
(11:59):
priority, and then lifecontinues to happen.
Things go wrong, things get inthe way.
Maybe we anticipate all thethings that might fail in our
idea, but we don't anticipateall the things that might fail
outside in our life.
Maybe we have a health problem,we get sick, someone else gets
sick, there's a natural disaster, there's, you know, something
goes wrong.
(12:19):
Life will always have problemsthat pop up and life will always
keep going.
So when we plan for that, whenwe are in a group, when we are
coaching, when we haveaccountability, then it helps us
to move through those momentsof life continuing to happen as
(12:41):
we're making our idea real.
I once was in a group coachingprogram and I had two six month
periods where big life thingswere happening as I was trying
to make my idea real long agoand I was talking to this coach
about them and I was like, oh,this happened and this happened
and this happened and I'mstruggling to try to like figure
out how to prioritize workingon on this project.
(13:03):
And she just stopped and shesaid you know, I haven't heard
you talk about what you actuallywant.
And I was like what she said?
I haven't.
I've heard you say what'sgetting in the way, but maybe
you want to work on the thingsthat are in the way.
Maybe that's what you actuallywant to be doing right now.
I haven't heard you talk aboutwhat you most want.
(13:28):
And it was so helpful to me toremember that we still have to
create the boundaries aroundlife, to prioritize our ideas as
we're making them real, as lifekeeps happening and we need to
keep tapping in to knowing ourwhy.
So if we set the boundaries andprioritize our idea being made
(13:54):
real, that strategy will help usto overcome number six, which
is not having enough boundaries.
If we have a gratitude practiceand we practice nostalgia for
now, that can become ourstrategy for number five, which
is not having enough gratitudewhen we ask ourselves what we
(14:17):
want and when we know our why,what is my why?
What is the reason that it's soimportant to me to make this
idea real?
That is the strategy that wecan use to overcome losing
motivation and momentum.
Okay, so that's three of thereasons, and here we go into our
(14:42):
last three.
So the third reason that peoplefail at making their ideas real
is because they're afraid tofail at making their ideas real
is because they're afraid tofail, so they fail ahead of time
.
(15:06):
Fear of failure is so sneaky.
It comes in so many forms.
Sometimes it comes in beingafraid of what people will think
.
Some people are afraid thateverybody's watching them and
they're going to judge them whenthey fail.
The halo effect is real.
We all think everyone iswatching us way more than they
actually are.
When you think about how ironicthat is, everybody else thinks
that we're watching them too.
(15:27):
Right, we all think everybodyis watching us, but we're all
thinking that.
All think everybody is watchingus, but we're all thinking that
.
So we think others are thinkingabout us and judging us much
more than they actually are, andit's taking the wind out of our
idea before we even let it sail.
We are failing ahead of timebecause we are erroneously
(15:48):
thinking that other people arethinking about us and we're just
not even trying because we'relike they're going to judge us.
They weren't even thinkingabout us.
When they are thinking about us, it's a projection of them.
Anyways, if they're judging usright, it's not even about us.
It comes in other formats too,though, this fear of failure.
(16:08):
Sometimes we're fearing failurebecause we don't want to fail
in front of other people.
We're afraid of what peoplewill think Other times.
We just think we need to bemore ready.
What does that even mean?
We're never ready.
Life's going to throw all kindsof things at us.
We think we need to know how,how it's all going to work out
(16:30):
every step of it.
We literally cannot know how,until we're in it, we can
prepare ourselves as beautifullyas we can, and then we just
have to learn how to do it.
By doing it, I have prepared sothoroughly for things and then
realized I was just preparing inthe wrong way.
I couldn't have preparedbecause I couldn't have really
understood what it was like tobe anything.
(16:51):
We have to learn by doing, andwhen we fail ahead of time to
avoid failure, we are increasingthe likelihood of our failure
to 100%.
There's a whole podcast that Irecorded about this, about
failing ahead of time.
When we have a failure, youknow, maybe our chance of
(17:11):
failure is like 35 to 40%, so wejust don't do it.
We have increased that chanceto 100% and just failed on
purpose.
Let's not do that.
It's number three.
And when we realize that we'reabout to fail on purpose, we can
(17:32):
pull back the veil, see whatwe're up to and try anyway.
And the other tactic that we canuse is to actually celebrate
failure forward and to iterateand taught this in learning
institutions, and learning is soamplified and success is so
(17:55):
amplified when we fail.
We have to fail multiple timesto understand what doesn't work
in order to understand what willwork.
So celebrate your failures andfailure is only valuable when we
learn something from it.
So the second thing to do withfailure is to do a retro.
(18:15):
I have a podcast episode onfailing ahead of time.
I have a whole other podcastepisode called.
Retros Are Everything that willteach you how to evaluate your
effort, evaluate your iteration,look at what worked, what
didn't work and what you want todo differently the next time
around, so that you're standingon the shoulders of your last
(18:38):
attempt and not making the samemistakes.
So in order to get past thisthird hurdle that keeps people
from being successful at turningtheir ideas into real things,
you just need to failintentionally.
Fail like you mean it, try,iterate, learn from it, do a
(18:58):
retro, celebrate failures,because it means that you're out
there in the world doing thething, not sitting on the
sidelines watching everybodyelse.
You are being an actor in theworld instead of a recipient of
what happens to you.
So that's number three.
The number two reason thatpeople do not make their ideas
(19:19):
into real things or they areunsuccessful when they start,
they're unsuccessful at turningtheir idea into a real thing is
that they do not createaccountability structures.
They either create a real,vague goal and are like I'm just
going to try to go for thisthing, and then they go it alone
.
They don't tell anybody.
And when they don't tellanybody and they don't create
(19:42):
any accountability structures,they are dramatically less
likely.
We are dramatically less likelyto reach our goals when we
don't have buddies.
We are 65% more likely to reachour goal.
If we have an accountabilitybuddy and that number of 65%
(20:05):
hold onto your butts, thatincreases to 95% more likely to
achieve our goal if we haveregular check-ins and meetings
with our accountability buddy.
95% Isn't that wackadoodle?
It's wild, right.
So find an accountability buddy.
(20:27):
The Bloom Room meets every weekand it is very low cost and
it's a whole community of peopleturning their ideas into real
things.
Just by joining the bloom room,you make yourself 95% more
likely to achieve your goals.
That is the number two reasonthat people.
(20:49):
The second most common reasonthat people don't make their
ideas into real things and thefirst most common reason that
people do not turn their ideasinto real things is that they
leave them really vague, theydon't make them measurable, they
don't make them time bound,they don't use a tracking system
(21:13):
to track their progress, theydon't make them specific and
they don't make them somethingthat is achievable and within
their realm of control.
I almost went into a wholedescription of this, but I'm
going to make it a separatepodcast so that you have them
really easy and shorter tolisten to, really easy as
(21:34):
reference material.
So I will go into this new takeon an old tool of SMART goals.
I'm going to tell you the databehind why SMART goals work and
some different ways of thinkingabout this old acronym that
we've all heard a million timesand how we can refresh it in our
brains and get the best out ofit.
So you can look for that on ournext episode, so that your
(21:58):
ideas don't stay stuck in yourhead but they actually get out
there in the world and turn intoreal things.
So that the next time that I'msitting around a fire talking to
somebody about what gets inpeople's way, maybe none of
these things will apply to you,because the world needs your
(22:21):
ideas.
Nobody else can do it like you.
So let's do a quick review.
The number one thing is thatpeople keep their ideas vague.
They don't turn them intomeasurable, time-bound,
achievable, smart goals.
Number two, they don't haveaccountability structures.
They don't create anaccountability system with
(22:42):
somebody else which makes them95% more likely to reach their
goal if they are checking inweekly with that accountability
person.
Come into the bloom room.
Let us be your accountabilityperson.
The third one is that they areafraid to fail.
The fourth one is that theylose motivation and lose
momentum.
(23:02):
The fifth one is they do nothave enough gratitude and they
think they have forever takingthings for granted.
And the sixth one is that theydo not have enough boundaries
set, so everything is suckingtheir time and attention.
Those are the top six reasonsand really the only six reasons
(23:24):
that I really see that peoplefail at turning their ideas into
real things.
So next week I'll share way moreabout how to make your idea
into a goal, how to break itdown into milestones and get the
thing done.
I'll also have a specialsurprise announcement on next
week's episode that relates totracking your goals.
(23:47):
So I will see you then.
That's what I've got for youthis week.
See you in the next one.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you got to come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
(24:07):
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
I'll see you in the bloom room.
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's Hello, everybody andwelcome to episode number 131 of
(00:33):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
So last episode, I shared anepisode called Rad Women, and it
was all about this incrediblepopulation of women that is
alive right now, living throughtheir middle decades, and how
wildly spectacular these womenare in very specific ways, and I
(00:55):
share my theory about whythey're this way and what a
beautiful moment in time we areliving in, what we have to learn
from them.
So go back and listen to that,whether you are a rad woman
yourself or not.
Go listen to it so you canlearn about these rad women.
And at that party I was sittingoutside.
Well, one of the things that'sin that episode is a party that
(01:18):
I went to and the rad women thatwere there, but these women
have been around all over theplace for my last year, but
specifically at that celebration, which was an annual 50th
birthday party how cool is thatI sat around a fire with another
couple that I was talking to,one of which was a rad woman,
(01:38):
and she was sitting there withher partner.
They're from the Bay Area andwe were having a beautiful
discussion myself, this coupleand my best friend from
kindergarten.
She and I were both therewearing the exact same outfit.
Can you believe that?
We didn't plan it?
We just showed up in the exactsame outfit and so we're sitting
around this fire, we'regiggling, we're chatting, we are
(02:01):
sharing stories, getting toknow each other, and the
gentleman there that we weretalking to said so what do you
do?
And I shared it with him, whatI do.
And he said well, tell me, whatis the number one thing that
gets in people's way when theyare trying to turn their idea
(02:22):
into a real thing?
And I paused and I watched likethat orange, orange firelight
flicker on his face and on thelandscaping, the plants that
were around him and on thestones around the fireplace, and
it was like dark, it was lateat night, with this orange
(02:43):
flickering fire, and I justthought about all of my clients,
I thought about all of you andI shared with him the top things
, couple of the top things thatI see getting in people's way,
and they are really crystalclear in my mind.
(03:03):
When he asked me this, which,of course, I ask myself this
question at different times andin different ways as I'm
preparing to teach, as I'mcoaching the bloom room, as I'm
working with a client, I thinkabout what's getting in their
way, but it's so interesting tojust be out in the wild and have
someone ask me this questionand see where my brain goes.
It was crystal clear what getsin people's way.
(03:28):
I have been doing this work for20 years 15 years through
leading an organization where wewere helping educators and kids
and administrators and leadersto turn ideas into real things.
And now, five or six yearsrunning my own business helping
people turn their ideas intoreal things through using the
(03:51):
tools of cognitive reframing,hypnosis and design thinking to
help people do this, and theprimary tool of community to
help people do this.
It was crystal, crystal clear.
So today I am going to sharethe six things that get in the
way of people turning theirideas into real things, and then
we're going to zoom in on thesecond to last and give you a
(04:16):
new take on an old tool aroundgoal setting.
So number six in the things thatget in people's way as they try
to make their ideas into realthings is they don't have enough
(04:37):
boundaries.
They are trying to doeverything Instead of focusing
in on the one idea that theywant to make real and
prioritizing it over everythingelse, or prioritizing it in ways
that will work over the otherthings that are also headliners
(04:58):
in their life.
Like for me, if I have an ideathat I want to make real, it has
to weave together and flow withmy family life, with my husband
, with my close friendships,with my need for exercise, with
the things that I love to do.
It has to flow among thosethings and it also has to be
(05:19):
prioritized, because what I seepeople do is, when they don't
prioritize it, their energy goesto all of the other things that
are asking for the resource oftheir time and attention.
These other things are otherpeople's favors, are other
people's requests, they areother people's priorities.
(05:42):
Other people will use our timeand our attention and the
resource of our time and ourattention and our energy.
If we don't use them ourselves.
What happens in that case is weget depleted by giving of
ourselves, giving ourselves toeveryone around us, and there
are parts of that that feel goodand there are parts that don't.
(06:06):
When we are constantly givingto everyone else's priorities.
We are not living in aregenerative way, where we're
giving.
We are deciding intentionallywhat the most important thing is
that we give our attention tofocusing in on that thing and
making sure that it isreciprocal, so we're getting
energy back from it.
(06:26):
So they're not giving enough oftheir time and attention to the
thing that is the idea thatthey're trying to make real.
So number six is not enoughboundaries.
Number five is not enoughgratitude that gets in people's
way.
What I mean is that we thinkthat we have forever, we think
(06:48):
we have unlimited time with thepeople in our lives, the places
where we spend time, the agethat we're at, the body, that we
have the face, that we have thebrain, that we have the health
that we have right now.
We take for granted what wehave right now and then it's
(07:15):
gone and then we're nostalgicfor it.
This also happens with ideas.
We think we have all the timein the world to make our ideas
real and we don't, for a coupleof different reasons.
Number one time passes by, andwhen we go back to our sixth
reason, which is we give ourenergy to all kinds of other
things, when we are giving ourattention and time to other
(07:37):
things.
Our time is taken and timepasses by, and so we don't ever
make an idea real because we'veput it off and put it off and
deferred it until later.
We've never made it theheadliner, we've never made it
the priority.
But secondly is ideas sometimeshave a life spark.
(07:58):
They are like living things.
It's like they're floatingaround and they come to us and
we're inspired by ideas and wehave to grab them when they're
there.
I cannot tell you how manytimes I've had an idea for a
podcast or an email or a groupor a book or one of my many
(08:21):
creations and I've written itdown and I've thought it was
going to be fresh as daisy.
When I came back to it laterand I look at my notes later and
I'm like nah, I'm not feelingit.
That idea is gone, it floatedaway from me and that, of course
, is the sort of likeinspiration for the idea.
To me it is the life of theidea.
(08:41):
Sometimes the time runs out onour ideas because the life runs
out of them.
They just leave us, they're notinspirational to us anymore.
But also sometimes ideas have atemporality in that like the
people, the other people thatwould be involved in making the
idea real are here right now butthey won't be here forever.
(09:03):
In making the idea real, orhere right now but they won't be
here forever.
Or the time and place.
I've heard a couple of peoplesay I was the first one ever to
have the idea for a taco truck,but now everybody's doing it.
There's also that temporalityright Like we might have an idea
and then the market is rightand the world is right and we
wait too long and it doesn'treally fit the world anymore.
(09:26):
So that's number five is notenough gratitude for where we
are, for the people that we'rewith, for the idea that we have
in front of us.
And I call it gratitude becauseI'm saying like really feeling
like this is a once everhappening thing that's right in
front of us.
But the other reason I saygratitude is because when we are
(09:50):
in the middle of turning anidea into a real thing, the more
grateful we are for every stageof that process, whether it's
this person that we have infront of us right now, the place
that we're in our age, our body, our face, our voice, our
health, the idea we're workingon, the part of the process that
we're in our age, our body, ourface, our voice, our health,
the idea we're working on thepart of the process that we're
in turning that idea into a realthing.
(10:12):
The more gratitude we have forevery second of it, the more
likely we are to make that ideareal.
The healthier our body is, thebetter our life is.
You can never have too muchgratitude.
So, number five not enoughgratitude.
(10:32):
Number four they lose theirmomentum.
I see this happen all the time.
People start with high levelsof motivation and high levels of
confidence when they startgoing into making an idea real.
The natural arc of this is thatis stage one.
Stage two is a plummetdownwards into a valley where
(10:53):
you lose motivation and you loseconfidence because you start to
understand all the things thatyou don't know.
And then there's a steady climbwhere you're building
confidence and buildingmotivation and momentum as you
learn and as you try and failand learn from it, as you take
steps and see your progress,until ultimately you have more
(11:17):
motivation, more confidence thanwhere you started.
But it's a journey.
So people start with highmotivation and then, when they
inevitably lose motivation atsome point and lose confidence
because they experienced theirfirst fail, or they find out how
much they don't know, then theyquit.
And when they're in the bloomroom they don't, and when
(11:37):
they're my client they don't.
But a lot of times out in theworld that is when people quit.
That is one thing.
And when people one of thethings that happens when they
take that dip into lowmotivation and low confidence is
that they realize that life isgoing to keep happening.
So we go into something withhigh motivation, making it our
(11:59):
priority, and then lifecontinues to happen.
Things go wrong, things get inthe way.
Maybe we anticipate all thethings that might fail in our
idea, but we don't anticipateall the things that might fail
outside in our life.
Maybe we have a health problem,we get sick, someone else gets
sick, there's a natural disaster, there's, you know, something
goes wrong.
(12:19):
Life will always have problemsthat pop up and life will always
keep going.
So when we plan for that, whenwe are in a group, when we are
coaching, when we haveaccountability, then it helps us
to move through those momentsof life continuing to happen as
(12:41):
we're making our idea real.
I once was in a group coachingprogram and I had two six month
periods where big life thingswere happening as I was trying
to make my idea real long agoand I was talking to this coach
about them and I was like, oh,this happened and this happened
and this happened and I'mstruggling to try to like figure
out how to prioritize workingon on this project.
(13:03):
And she just stopped and shesaid you know, I haven't heard
you talk about what you actuallywant.
And I was like what she said?
I haven't.
I've heard you say what'sgetting in the way, but maybe
you want to work on the thingsthat are in the way.
Maybe that's what you actuallywant to be doing right now.
I haven't heard you talk aboutwhat you most want.
(13:28):
And it was so helpful to me toremember that we still have to
create the boundaries aroundlife, to prioritize our ideas as
we're making them real, as lifekeeps happening and we need to
keep tapping in to knowing ourwhy.
So if we set the boundaries andprioritize our idea being made
(13:54):
real, that strategy will help usto overcome number six, which
is not having enough boundaries.
If we have a gratitude practiceand we practice nostalgia for
now, that can become ourstrategy for number five, which
is not having enough gratitudewhen we ask ourselves what we
(14:17):
want and when we know our why,what is my why?
What is the reason that it's soimportant to me to make this
idea real?
That is the strategy that wecan use to overcome losing
motivation and momentum.
Okay, so that's three of thereasons, and here we go into our
(14:42):
last three.
So the third reason that peoplefail at making their ideas real
is because they're afraid tofail at making their ideas real
is because they're afraid tofail, so they fail ahead of time
.
(15:06):
Fear of failure is so sneaky.
It comes in so many forms.
Sometimes it comes in beingafraid of what people will think
.
Some people are afraid thateverybody's watching them and
they're going to judge them whenthey fail.
The halo effect is real.
We all think everyone iswatching us way more than they
actually are.
When you think about how ironicthat is, everybody else thinks
that we're watching them too.
(15:27):
Right, we all think everybodyis watching us, but we're all
thinking that.
All think everybody is watchingus, but we're all thinking that
.
So we think others are thinkingabout us and judging us much
more than they actually are, andit's taking the wind out of our
idea before we even let it sail.
We are failing ahead of timebecause we are erroneously
(15:48):
thinking that other people arethinking about us and we're just
not even trying because we'relike they're going to judge us.
They weren't even thinkingabout us.
When they are thinking about us, it's a projection of them.
Anyways, if they're judging usright, it's not even about us.
It comes in other formats too,though, this fear of failure.
(16:08):
Sometimes we're fearing failurebecause we don't want to fail
in front of other people.
We're afraid of what peoplewill think Other times.
We just think we need to bemore ready.
What does that even mean?
We're never ready.
Life's going to throw all kindsof things at us.
We think we need to know how,how it's all going to work out
(16:30):
every step of it.
We literally cannot know how,until we're in it, we can
prepare ourselves as beautifullyas we can, and then we just
have to learn how to do it.
By doing it, I have prepared sothoroughly for things and then
realized I was just preparing inthe wrong way.
I couldn't have preparedbecause I couldn't have really
understood what it was like tobe anything.
(16:51):
We have to learn by doing, andwhen we fail ahead of time to
avoid failure, we are increasingthe likelihood of our failure
to 100%.
There's a whole podcast that Irecorded about this, about
failing ahead of time.
When we have a failure, youknow, maybe our chance of
(17:11):
failure is like 35 to 40%, so wejust don't do it.
We have increased that chanceto 100% and just failed on
purpose.
Let's not do that.
It's number three.
And when we realize that we'reabout to fail on purpose, we can
(17:32):
pull back the veil, see whatwe're up to and try anyway.
And the other tactic that we canuse is to actually celebrate
failure forward and to iterateand taught this in learning
institutions, and learning is soamplified and success is so
(17:55):
amplified when we fail.
We have to fail multiple timesto understand what doesn't work
in order to understand what willwork.
So celebrate your failures andfailure is only valuable when we
learn something from it.
So the second thing to do withfailure is to do a retro.
(18:15):
I have a podcast episode onfailing ahead of time.
I have a whole other podcastepisode called.
Retros Are Everything that willteach you how to evaluate your
effort, evaluate your iteration,look at what worked, what
didn't work and what you want todo differently the next time
around, so that you're standingon the shoulders of your last
(18:38):
attempt and not making the samemistakes.
So in order to get past thisthird hurdle that keeps people
from being successful at turningtheir ideas into real things,
you just need to failintentionally.
Fail like you mean it, try,iterate, learn from it, do a
(18:58):
retro, celebrate failures,because it means that you're out
there in the world doing thething, not sitting on the
sidelines watching everybodyelse.
You are being an actor in theworld instead of a recipient of
what happens to you.
So that's number three.
The number two reason thatpeople do not make their ideas
(19:19):
into real things or they areunsuccessful when they start,
they're unsuccessful at turningtheir idea into a real thing is
that they do not createaccountability structures.
They either create a real,vague goal and are like I'm just
going to try to go for thisthing, and then they go it alone
.
They don't tell anybody.
And when they don't tellanybody and they don't create
(19:42):
any accountability structures,they are dramatically less
likely.
We are dramatically less likelyto reach our goals when we
don't have buddies.
We are 65% more likely to reachour goal.
If we have an accountabilitybuddy and that number of 65%
(20:05):
hold onto your butts, thatincreases to 95% more likely to
achieve our goal if we haveregular check-ins and meetings
with our accountability buddy.
95% Isn't that wackadoodle?
It's wild, right.
So find an accountability buddy.
(20:27):
The Bloom Room meets every weekand it is very low cost and
it's a whole community of peopleturning their ideas into real
things.
Just by joining the bloom room,you make yourself 95% more
likely to achieve your goals.
That is the number two reasonthat people.
(20:49):
The second most common reasonthat people don't make their
ideas into real things and thefirst most common reason that
people do not turn their ideasinto real things is that they
leave them really vague, theydon't make them measurable, they
don't make them time bound,they don't use a tracking system
(21:13):
to track their progress, theydon't make them specific and
they don't make them somethingthat is achievable and within
their realm of control.
I almost went into a wholedescription of this, but I'm
going to make it a separatepodcast so that you have them
really easy and shorter tolisten to, really easy as
(21:34):
reference material.
So I will go into this new takeon an old tool of SMART goals.
I'm going to tell you the databehind why SMART goals work and
some different ways of thinkingabout this old acronym that
we've all heard a million timesand how we can refresh it in our
brains and get the best out ofit.
So you can look for that on ournext episode, so that your
(21:58):
ideas don't stay stuck in yourhead but they actually get out
there in the world and turn intoreal things.
So that the next time that I'msitting around a fire talking to
somebody about what gets inpeople's way, maybe none of
these things will apply to you,because the world needs your
(22:21):
ideas.
Nobody else can do it like you.
So let's do a quick review.
The number one thing is thatpeople keep their ideas vague.
They don't turn them intomeasurable, time-bound,
achievable, smart goals.
Number two, they don't haveaccountability structures.
They don't create anaccountability system with
(22:42):
somebody else which makes them95% more likely to reach their
goal if they are checking inweekly with that accountability
person.
Come into the bloom room.
Let us be your accountabilityperson.
The third one is that they areafraid to fail.
The fourth one is that theylose motivation and lose
momentum.
(23:02):
The fifth one is they do nothave enough gratitude and they
think they have forever takingthings for granted.
And the sixth one is that theydo not have enough boundaries
set, so everything is suckingtheir time and attention.
Those are the top six reasonsand really the only six reasons
(23:24):
that I really see that peoplefail at turning their ideas into
real things.
So next week I'll share way moreabout how to make your idea
into a goal, how to break itdown into milestones and get the
thing done.
I'll also have a specialsurprise announcement on next
week's episode that relates totracking your goals.
(23:47):
So I will see you then.
That's what I've got for youthis week.
See you in the next one.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you got to come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
(24:07):
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
I'll see you in the bloom room.
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