August 8, 2025 • 19 mins
With a cup of melted ice cream in my hand, I waited for a group of kids to explore a book store, staring in the window at the best sellers. That was the day I found an author whose prose gave me a week of both mind-swooning entertainment and a jolting moment of reflection.
She wrote about giving our time and energy to things that fill us with passion and motivation. That fill our minds the moment we open our eyes in the morning, and fill our souls with purpose and life. Everything I’ve created in the last five years of thought leadership is about this idea. I’ve created podcasts and books, programs and coaching groups to helping people find where and how their passion can take form. We all want to find it.
So why do we so often find ourselves pulled off track by the passion and motivation of others? If you’ve ever found yourself working too hard at a job or in a volunteer position, giving too much to the family or relationships that you serve, this episode is for you.
Things you’ll learn in this episode:
- The one most common thing that makes people spin their wheels instead of getting into action
- The difference between working toward your passion, and giving time and energy too someone else’s passion
- Why it feels so good to support people when their idea is inspired and their vision is full of intent and energy
- How to intentionally choose to support someone else’s idea, and find your own vision inside of it
- How to know when the time you’ve spent working toward someone else’s idea has come to a close
- Why the world needs feminine ideas and feminine leadership more than ever before
- Two questions to ask yourself to help uncover the whispers of your own ideas, and how to know when you’re giving too much time and energy too something outside of yourself
Mentioned in this podcast:
- Taylor Jenkins Reid: Daisy Jones and the Six
- Taylor Jenkins Reid: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo
How to connect with Marie:
- On the Web | The Local Bloom
- Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
- All Things Marie on LinkTree
JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Well, hello everyone andwelcome to episode number 139 of
(00:32):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
I'm recording this for you in acabin up in the Sierras that I
helped to build with my brothersand my dad up right around
Bridgeport on the eastern slopeof the Sierras.
So while normally when I recorda podcast for you, I warn you
that you might hear something inthe background, like
(00:54):
neighborhood sounds or mychildren, today you might hear
my dad with his tree trimmerscutting off the limbs of aspen
trees that are growing too closeto the cabin for fire safety.
So that's pretty fun.
You might not hear them, butnow your imagination can create
them in the background.
I've been coming to this cabinfor years.
(01:15):
I've probably told you about itbefore on the podcast.
I remember during graduateschool in San Francisco driving
this tiny little fishing truck,the Chevrolet, a manual
Chevrolet fishing truck over theSonora pass.
This pass that goes over theSierras called Sonora pass, in
the middle of the night, with ithailing, and I was just telling
(01:39):
my husband about that and hewas like thank God you made it
through that night.
You know, back in my twenties,late twenties, when I felt
invincible.
We made it.
And now we are back in thisbeautiful place where my
children have memories fromevery year, and I am recording
an episode for you here at thecabin among the Aspen.
So last week I picked my kids upfrom camp they're one week of
(02:03):
camp this summer and I picked upa bunch of their friends too,
which I have a tendency to do tocreate a little party for my
kids all the time and I tookthem into the local neighborhood
village of South Park and we'regetting some ice cream.
It's after camp.
They have face paint on thatlooks like some combination of a
(02:23):
coal miner and a clown blendedup.
It's like used to look amazing,but it's smudged from a day of
sweat and play and tree brancheswhipping over what used to be a
masterpiece on their face andthen painted there with love and
care and now was replaced withlike a scene from Mary Poppins,
that chimney sweep scene.
(02:43):
That's what they looked like,like this black face paint just
smudged and they have ice creamthat we've got next door and
they decide that they're all.
You know, there's like sevenkids and they're all going to go
next door.
A couple of the moms had come togo to the bookstore, so I'm
standing outside holdingsomeone's half eaten ice cream
in a little ice cream cup.
(03:04):
It is melted so it is fullyliquid.
It's like a couple of flavorsmelted together that should
never be put together andthey're melted in this cup in my
hand, which is precluding mefrom going into the bookstore
because you can't go in therewith a drink or an ice cream,
and I know the child is notgoing to finish eating this.
(03:25):
But I haven't quite gotten tothe place where I'm like I'm
going to throw this away.
I'm standing there holding itand I'm looking in the window
and looking at the books in thewindow because I can't go in yet
.
And one of my friends, a parent,comes up to me and she says
have you read that author?
And she's pointing at this bookin front of us.
Don't remember?
(03:46):
Maybe it's something aboutMalibu?
Was the cover of the book orthe name of the book?
And I said no, I haven't readthat author.
She says do you read?
And I say I read all the time.
I often read about designthinking and psychology and
sociology.
I'm mostly always reading somekind of business or psychology
or sociology book, a book onhypnosis or something like that,
and I usually have a fictionbook going at the same time,
(04:10):
often in audio book form, togive my brain that kind of fun
imaginative escape.
And I said to her but I needsome references here, I need
some book recommendations forreally good fiction.
And she says this author thatwe're looking at she's it.
She said everything she writesis gold, which I love.
I love finding an author andthen falling in love with them
(04:32):
and reading everything theywrote.
So she gave me two bookrecommendations and I bought
them and he said who do I startwith?
Which of these books do I startwith?
Because this author has beenpretty prolific.
There's a lot of books that Icould choose from.
And I'd heard of the authorwhich I'm sure all of you are
rolling your eyes like, ofcourse we know who this is
Taylor Jenkins, reid, and I justhadn't really dug in yet and
(04:56):
she said, well, of all the books, I'd recommend Daisy Jones and
the Six and the Seven Husbandsof Evelyn Hugo.
And I was like all right, tellme why.
And she said I got both thebooks.
And I said tell me which one tostart with.
That's what I said she's likewell, I don't know, they're both
(05:18):
so good.
Daisy Jones and the six, that'srock and roll.
The seven husbands of EvelynHugo, that's like old Hollywood
and kind of glam and startedtalking about that.
And I, I went immediately withrock and roll.
So now I'm here at the cabinwhere we're spending two weeks.
I've been on road trips with mykids, I've been on all kinds of
summer adventures, but this,this is downtime.
Sure, we'll take the kidsfishing, we'll take them to
(05:40):
parks, see wild horses, we'lltake them on some adventures.
But what I want out of thistrip is to read.
I brought seven books with meand we've been here now for two
days, my friends and I've readtwo books.
I can't even believe it.
I started with Daisy Jones andthe Six and I burnt through it
in a day and now I have onechapter left of the second book
(06:01):
and they're phenomenal.
She was right, but, as greatfiction does, I got to a line in
Daisy Jones and the Six thatslowed me down and touched my
heart and made me stop and writefor a little bit because it
spoke to my life and what I'mdoing in the world and what we
talk about on this podcast.
And now, when I went to recordthis podcast for you, I thumbed
(06:25):
through the book for quite awhile trying to find this one
sentence, and I could not findit because I can't even remember
which part of the book ithappened in.
I just paused and threw downthe book and started writing
about this idea, and so I'm justgoing to tell you that the
basic kind of like meaning ofthis sentence this, this quote
(06:45):
from the book was about how oneof the character's father she
wasn't very close to him, but hesaid one thing that always
stuck with her, and it was thatwhatever you do with your life,
whatever you spend your lifedoing, make sure it's the thing
that you're passionate about,that you want to put your life
(07:07):
energy into, and he said makesure it wakes you up in the
morning.
You want to put your lifeenergy into and he said make
sure it wakes you up in themorning.
You wake up thinking about it,you can't wait to get back to it
and you love it.
It's this thing that you'repassionate about.
And, of course, taylor Jenkinsreads that so much more
eloquently than that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but you know, readthe book.
(07:32):
It's phenomenal, and I will.
When I'm back where I haveaccess to Wi-Fi, I will actually
have AI find the quote for meand maybe I'll add it to the
show notes and I'm all aboutthis.
I mean, this is what the BloomRoom is about making your ideas
into real things, what Bloomyour Mind, the podcast, is about
and what my mastermind, theMoxie mastermind, is all about.
My favorite quote that talksabout the same idea that I've
talked about on the podcastbefore is finding where your
(07:54):
heart deep longing, meets theworld's deep need.
But I want to go two zooms inhere and talk about something
else.
That zoom in is on where theword your, where your heart's
passion, and the second zoom inis on the world's deep need
(08:15):
where your deep passion meetsthe world's deep need.
Because the thing that I seetaking people off course over
and over more often thananything else, and the thing
that has taken me off course oractually just made me spin my
wheels for years and maybedecades before I gave time and
space to my own idea, is thatthey or we put our passion, our
(08:38):
energy, our time, our drive intosomeone else's passion, someone
else's need, their deep passionand their need.
Because it feels so good to benext to somebody's passion, to
be a part of a vision that'sinspired, that somebody else is
so fired up about, and we wantto cozy up to that bright light,
(09:00):
that sense of purpose.
When we're working, spendingour effort, our time, our energy
, our money, whatever to supportsomebody's purpose that is full
of light and excitement, wefeel like we're a part of
something.
When that happens, it'shappening here and now and we're
in it, and sometimes that's agood thing.
Maybe it's a good thing for awhile, and I also see it pull us
(09:25):
off track, because we getoverly committed to our part in
their vision, our responsibilityin pulling off their idea, and
we get so pulled off track thatwe sort of lose sight and start
to think we can never leave.
We couldn't let them down.
We couldn't let it down.
Our part, our responsibility,is too big.
(09:46):
We can never change the waythat things are, instead of
knowing when it's time to changecourse and follow our own idea
Because that's so much scarierwe're not only in the rhythm and
the responsibility and maybethe people pleasing or whatever,
maybe the culture that we can'tsee out of, because it's the
water we're swimming in, where,for all these reasons, it's hard
(10:06):
to break out.
But also we're fighting ourmotivational triad that wants to
keep things easy, staycomfortable, not do scary things
, not push ourselves, never riskrejection or failure Right.
So we're really rowing againstthe current when we decide I'm
going to leave this safety ofthis complacence or what's
(10:28):
comfortable, or this servicethat I'm giving, even if it's
draining my energy and my timeand the years of my life, but
I'm going to stay here, becauseit's way scarier to think of
going and changing things,speaking up or going out on my
own and starting to make timefor my own idea, and similarly,
we do this instead of speakingup about the parts that we're
(10:51):
not okay with.
I see this a lot in familycultures, in work cultures, in
relationship cultures wherewe're like it's always been like
this.
The whole rest of the system islike this how can I speak up?
No one will listen, so we justgo along with it.
And oftentimes the person thatis leading this vision, the
(11:11):
person that is in charge, whosevision we're enticed by or whose
vision we are inspired by, theyhave a lot of positional power,
which again, isn't a bad thing,right Like.
We put people in positions ofpower sometimes because they are
visionaries, because they havevisionary ideas for how the
world can be a better place, andthat's okay.
(11:32):
It's just important to be awareof it, because sometimes we get
stuck giving that power tosomeone else instead of
realizing how much power we havein ourselves and understanding
when it's time to step out ofsomebody else's story and out of
being the supporting actor insomebody else's movie, in
(11:54):
somebody else's idea, and tobecome the lead actor in our own
life, in our own moment, andgive the time and weight to our
own idea that we want to,because we don't have to give
our heart and money andwell-being and ideas and the
minutes of our lives to somebodyelse's idea, no matter how
great it is.
We can do that when it feelsright.
(12:16):
It's okay when our love andeffort are going towards someone
else's idea, when it is aconscious choice.
We believe in them.
We've decided how much timewe're going to give it, or we've
just decided we're going togive our time and energy to it.
And one thing that I thinkworks specifically well when
we're deciding to do.
That is when we really believein it, to see how we can bring
(12:39):
it into a bigger bloom than whatwas possible before.
Because we are there.
What's our part in it?
Why do we believe in our partof it?
When we're working to makesomeone else's idea real, how
can we make it even bigger andbeautiful than it was before and
go with full intention into it,knowing the reason we're
choosing to give our time andeffort and love to their idea is
(13:02):
because we want to.
It's in line with our values,because we say so.
I made this mistake a coupletimes.
I did it with families, with mybosses, with some relationships
, and then I realized the cost.
With my families, it was kindof the idea of how family
(13:23):
dynamics should be.
With my bosses, they hadbrilliant ideas, these two
specific CEOs that I gave yearsto because I believed in their
mission and their vision, theirorganization, their business,
their cultures, and I'm so gladthat I was a part of both of
them.
I would never have taken thoseback.
And I heard myself both timesafter a certain amount of time
(13:44):
had passed.
I heard myself saying I'm readyto put some time and energy
into my own idea, into my ownvision into what I want to
create in the world, and Iwasn't quite ready yet.
But at least in the secondinstance I stayed too long.
I was stuck because I startedto realize then at the end I it
(14:06):
has been a couple of years.
It's been a few years where thecost has been way higher than
what I'm giving here.
It's the cost of my story, mylife, my ideas, and there was
this little piece of me that waswhispering and whispering to be
let out, and I realized I don'twant to be a human being, a
woman who lets my daughter learnfrom this type of example.
(14:28):
I want to be for myself, forher, for all of us example.
I want to be for myself, forher, for all of us.
I want to make my own ideasreal.
I want to push into what'stotally uncomfortable and go out
there and give what only I cangive to the world.
And again, this story isdifferent for everyone.
I'm sharing mine because thisis my version of it.
I think this you know, aversion of this can look as many
(14:54):
different ways as there arepeople in the world.
What I'm encouraging us to do isto look at where we're folding
our story into someone else's,where we're storing, folding our
vision into somebody else'svision, else's vision, where
(15:17):
we're giving more time, energy,years of our life, effort than
we actually want to be at theexpense of what we want to do
and create in the world.
So I started seeing that costand I thought wait, this isn't
right.
I'm not being authentic, I'mnot being as courageous as I
want to be.
I'm not going to be silentanymore about the parts of
cultures that I'm not okay with.
(15:38):
I'm not going to let myself bedrained anymore by saying yes
and yes and yes, and I'm notgoing to be complacent as years
pass by while I serve somebodyelse's idea of becoming real, no
matter how much I believe in it.
I'm not going to do it becauseit feels more comfortable,
because I can tell that I'vedone it enough, that part of my
story is complete.
(15:59):
I've loved my time here, andthe only reason I'm here now is
because it's more comfortablethan what I know I need to do
next, because there's a wholeland inside of us full of magic,
full of fire, full of love andfull of moxie, and the reason
I'm so passionate aboutvocalizing this and about making
(16:25):
this episode about creatingspaces to pull out other
people's ideas is because thatquote in that book made me think
about my own work.
That's what it is for me.
The reason I've done everythingthat I've done this podcast,
the bloom room and why I createdthe Moxie Mastermind is because
(16:45):
I am passionate about creatingspaces where other women, other
people and specifically, otherwomen can let out their ideas
that they see in the world forhow the world could be a better
place.
They make their ideas real, notput their effort into making
somebody else's ideas real, notput their effort into taking
(17:06):
care of everybody else.
Because the world right now,with all the isms that we live
in this patriarchal structureand a capitalist structure,
structures full of racism and arejection of nature we need
strong feminine leadership.
We need strong feminine ideasmade real.
We need more and more of thoseideas.
(17:29):
So that's what I did.
I created the Moxie Mastermind,a space to nurse the Moxie out
of the fierce and tender womenin this world.
Their idea, your idea, your way.
What's your idea?
Maybe it's creating spaces,maybe it's just changing
something in your life.
Maybe it's changing somethingin a relationship in a family.
(17:50):
Maybe it's changing somethingin a relationship in a family.
Where is the place where yourpassion is whispering to you and
has been, maybe, for a while.
Two last questions for you here.
What is an idea that has beenwhispering to you?
Just take a moment and thinkabout that.
An idea for how your life orthe world, or a relationship
(18:17):
that you're in?
Or an idea for something youreally want to create and put
out there in the world ofbusiness, or a book, or a piece
of art or a community?
Where has that idea beenwhispering to you and you
haven't been giving it time orspace, because your time and
space is taken with somethingelse, either someone else's idea
or service.
And secondly, where are youworking too hard or giving too
(18:40):
much for someone else's idea,someone else's vision of the way
that things should be?
That's what I've got for youtoday.
I would love to hear from any ofyou that do this exercise and
find something, and until then,I will see you next week.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you got to come
(19:11):
and join us in the Bloom Room.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you gotta come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life.
In a community where we haveeach other's backs and we bring
out the best in each other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
I'll see you in the bloom room.
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Well, hello everyone andwelcome to episode number 139 of
(00:32):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
I'm recording this for you in acabin up in the Sierras that I
helped to build with my brothersand my dad up right around
Bridgeport on the eastern slopeof the Sierras.
So while normally when I recorda podcast for you, I warn you
that you might hear something inthe background, like
(00:54):
neighborhood sounds or mychildren, today you might hear
my dad with his tree trimmerscutting off the limbs of aspen
trees that are growing too closeto the cabin for fire safety.
So that's pretty fun.
You might not hear them, butnow your imagination can create
them in the background.
I've been coming to this cabinfor years.
(01:15):
I've probably told you about itbefore on the podcast.
I remember during graduateschool in San Francisco driving
this tiny little fishing truck,the Chevrolet, a manual
Chevrolet fishing truck over theSonora pass.
This pass that goes over theSierras called Sonora pass, in
the middle of the night, with ithailing, and I was just telling
(01:39):
my husband about that and hewas like thank God you made it
through that night.
You know, back in my twenties,late twenties, when I felt
invincible.
We made it.
And now we are back in thisbeautiful place where my
children have memories fromevery year, and I am recording
an episode for you here at thecabin among the Aspen.
So last week I picked my kids upfrom camp they're one week of
(02:03):
camp this summer and I picked upa bunch of their friends too,
which I have a tendency to do tocreate a little party for my
kids all the time and I tookthem into the local neighborhood
village of South Park and we'regetting some ice cream.
It's after camp.
They have face paint on thatlooks like some combination of a
(02:23):
coal miner and a clown blendedup.
It's like used to look amazing,but it's smudged from a day of
sweat and play and tree brancheswhipping over what used to be a
masterpiece on their face andthen painted there with love and
care and now was replaced withlike a scene from Mary Poppins,
that chimney sweep scene.
(02:43):
That's what they looked like,like this black face paint just
smudged and they have ice creamthat we've got next door and
they decide that they're all.
You know, there's like sevenkids and they're all going to go
next door.
A couple of the moms had come togo to the bookstore, so I'm
standing outside holdingsomeone's half eaten ice cream
in a little ice cream cup.
(03:04):
It is melted so it is fullyliquid.
It's like a couple of flavorsmelted together that should
never be put together andthey're melted in this cup in my
hand, which is precluding mefrom going into the bookstore
because you can't go in therewith a drink or an ice cream,
and I know the child is notgoing to finish eating this.
(03:25):
But I haven't quite gotten tothe place where I'm like I'm
going to throw this away.
I'm standing there holding itand I'm looking in the window
and looking at the books in thewindow because I can't go in yet
.
And one of my friends, a parent,comes up to me and she says
have you read that author?
And she's pointing at this bookin front of us.
Don't remember?
(03:46):
Maybe it's something aboutMalibu?
Was the cover of the book orthe name of the book?
And I said no, I haven't readthat author.
She says do you read?
And I say I read all the time.
I often read about designthinking and psychology and
sociology.
I'm mostly always reading somekind of business or psychology
or sociology book, a book onhypnosis or something like that,
and I usually have a fictionbook going at the same time,
(04:10):
often in audio book form, togive my brain that kind of fun
imaginative escape.
And I said to her but I needsome references here, I need
some book recommendations forreally good fiction.
And she says this author thatwe're looking at she's it.
She said everything she writesis gold, which I love.
I love finding an author andthen falling in love with them
(04:32):
and reading everything theywrote.
So she gave me two bookrecommendations and I bought
them and he said who do I startwith?
Which of these books do I startwith?
Because this author has beenpretty prolific.
There's a lot of books that Icould choose from.
And I'd heard of the authorwhich I'm sure all of you are
rolling your eyes like, ofcourse we know who this is
Taylor Jenkins, reid, and I justhadn't really dug in yet and
(04:56):
she said, well, of all the books, I'd recommend Daisy Jones and
the Six and the Seven Husbandsof Evelyn Hugo.
And I was like all right, tellme why.
And she said I got both thebooks.
And I said tell me which one tostart with.
That's what I said she's likewell, I don't know, they're both
(05:18):
so good.
Daisy Jones and the six, that'srock and roll.
The seven husbands of EvelynHugo, that's like old Hollywood
and kind of glam and startedtalking about that.
And I, I went immediately withrock and roll.
So now I'm here at the cabinwhere we're spending two weeks.
I've been on road trips with mykids, I've been on all kinds of
summer adventures, but this,this is downtime.
Sure, we'll take the kidsfishing, we'll take them to
(05:40):
parks, see wild horses, we'lltake them on some adventures.
But what I want out of thistrip is to read.
I brought seven books with meand we've been here now for two
days, my friends and I've readtwo books.
I can't even believe it.
I started with Daisy Jones andthe Six and I burnt through it
in a day and now I have onechapter left of the second book
(06:01):
and they're phenomenal.
She was right, but, as greatfiction does, I got to a line in
Daisy Jones and the Six thatslowed me down and touched my
heart and made me stop and writefor a little bit because it
spoke to my life and what I'mdoing in the world and what we
talk about on this podcast.
And now, when I went to recordthis podcast for you, I thumbed
(06:25):
through the book for quite awhile trying to find this one
sentence, and I could not findit because I can't even remember
which part of the book ithappened in.
I just paused and threw downthe book and started writing
about this idea, and so I'm justgoing to tell you that the
basic kind of like meaning ofthis sentence this, this quote
(06:45):
from the book was about how oneof the character's father she
wasn't very close to him, but hesaid one thing that always
stuck with her, and it was thatwhatever you do with your life,
whatever you spend your lifedoing, make sure it's the thing
that you're passionate about,that you want to put your life
(07:07):
energy into, and he said makesure it wakes you up in the
morning.
You want to put your lifeenergy into and he said make
sure it wakes you up in themorning.
You wake up thinking about it,you can't wait to get back to it
and you love it.
It's this thing that you'repassionate about.
And, of course, taylor Jenkinsreads that so much more
eloquently than that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but you know, readthe book.
(07:32):
It's phenomenal, and I will.
When I'm back where I haveaccess to Wi-Fi, I will actually
have AI find the quote for meand maybe I'll add it to the
show notes and I'm all aboutthis.
I mean, this is what the BloomRoom is about making your ideas
into real things, what Bloomyour Mind, the podcast, is about
and what my mastermind, theMoxie mastermind, is all about.
My favorite quote that talksabout the same idea that I've
talked about on the podcastbefore is finding where your
(07:54):
heart deep longing, meets theworld's deep need.
But I want to go two zooms inhere and talk about something
else.
That zoom in is on where theword your, where your heart's
passion, and the second zoom inis on the world's deep need
(08:15):
where your deep passion meetsthe world's deep need.
Because the thing that I seetaking people off course over
and over more often thananything else, and the thing
that has taken me off course oractually just made me spin my
wheels for years and maybedecades before I gave time and
space to my own idea, is thatthey or we put our passion, our
(08:38):
energy, our time, our drive intosomeone else's passion, someone
else's need, their deep passionand their need.
Because it feels so good to benext to somebody's passion, to
be a part of a vision that'sinspired, that somebody else is
so fired up about, and we wantto cozy up to that bright light,
(09:00):
that sense of purpose.
When we're working, spendingour effort, our time, our energy
, our money, whatever to supportsomebody's purpose that is full
of light and excitement, wefeel like we're a part of
something.
When that happens, it'shappening here and now and we're
in it, and sometimes that's agood thing.
Maybe it's a good thing for awhile, and I also see it pull us
(09:25):
off track, because we getoverly committed to our part in
their vision, our responsibilityin pulling off their idea, and
we get so pulled off track thatwe sort of lose sight and start
to think we can never leave.
We couldn't let them down.
We couldn't let it down.
Our part, our responsibility,is too big.
(09:46):
We can never change the waythat things are, instead of
knowing when it's time to changecourse and follow our own idea
Because that's so much scarierwe're not only in the rhythm and
the responsibility and maybethe people pleasing or whatever,
maybe the culture that we can'tsee out of, because it's the
water we're swimming in, where,for all these reasons, it's hard
(10:06):
to break out.
But also we're fighting ourmotivational triad that wants to
keep things easy, staycomfortable, not do scary things
, not push ourselves, never riskrejection or failure Right.
So we're really rowing againstthe current when we decide I'm
going to leave this safety ofthis complacence or what's
(10:28):
comfortable, or this servicethat I'm giving, even if it's
draining my energy and my timeand the years of my life, but
I'm going to stay here, becauseit's way scarier to think of
going and changing things,speaking up or going out on my
own and starting to make timefor my own idea, and similarly,
we do this instead of speakingup about the parts that we're
(10:51):
not okay with.
I see this a lot in familycultures, in work cultures, in
relationship cultures wherewe're like it's always been like
this.
The whole rest of the system islike this how can I speak up?
No one will listen, so we justgo along with it.
And oftentimes the person thatis leading this vision, the
(11:11):
person that is in charge, whosevision we're enticed by or whose
vision we are inspired by, theyhave a lot of positional power,
which again, isn't a bad thing,right Like.
We put people in positions ofpower sometimes because they are
visionaries, because they havevisionary ideas for how the
world can be a better place, andthat's okay.
(11:32):
It's just important to be awareof it, because sometimes we get
stuck giving that power tosomeone else instead of
realizing how much power we havein ourselves and understanding
when it's time to step out ofsomebody else's story and out of
being the supporting actor insomebody else's movie, in
(11:54):
somebody else's idea, and tobecome the lead actor in our own
life, in our own moment, andgive the time and weight to our
own idea that we want to,because we don't have to give
our heart and money andwell-being and ideas and the
minutes of our lives to somebodyelse's idea, no matter how
great it is.
We can do that when it feelsright.
(12:16):
It's okay when our love andeffort are going towards someone
else's idea, when it is aconscious choice.
We believe in them.
We've decided how much timewe're going to give it, or we've
just decided we're going togive our time and energy to it.
And one thing that I thinkworks specifically well when
we're deciding to do.
That is when we really believein it, to see how we can bring
(12:39):
it into a bigger bloom than whatwas possible before.
Because we are there.
What's our part in it?
Why do we believe in our partof it?
When we're working to makesomeone else's idea real, how
can we make it even bigger andbeautiful than it was before and
go with full intention into it,knowing the reason we're
choosing to give our time andeffort and love to their idea is
(13:02):
because we want to.
It's in line with our values,because we say so.
I made this mistake a coupletimes.
I did it with families, with mybosses, with some relationships
, and then I realized the cost.
With my families, it was kindof the idea of how family
(13:23):
dynamics should be.
With my bosses, they hadbrilliant ideas, these two
specific CEOs that I gave yearsto because I believed in their
mission and their vision, theirorganization, their business,
their cultures, and I'm so gladthat I was a part of both of
them.
I would never have taken thoseback.
And I heard myself both timesafter a certain amount of time
(13:44):
had passed.
I heard myself saying I'm readyto put some time and energy
into my own idea, into my ownvision into what I want to
create in the world, and Iwasn't quite ready yet.
But at least in the secondinstance I stayed too long.
I was stuck because I startedto realize then at the end I it
(14:06):
has been a couple of years.
It's been a few years where thecost has been way higher than
what I'm giving here.
It's the cost of my story, mylife, my ideas, and there was
this little piece of me that waswhispering and whispering to be
let out, and I realized I don'twant to be a human being, a
woman who lets my daughter learnfrom this type of example.
(14:28):
I want to be for myself, forher, for all of us example.
I want to be for myself, forher, for all of us.
I want to make my own ideasreal.
I want to push into what'stotally uncomfortable and go out
there and give what only I cangive to the world.
And again, this story isdifferent for everyone.
I'm sharing mine because thisis my version of it.
I think this you know, aversion of this can look as many
(14:54):
different ways as there arepeople in the world.
What I'm encouraging us to do isto look at where we're folding
our story into someone else's,where we're storing, folding our
vision into somebody else'svision, else's vision, where
(15:17):
we're giving more time, energy,years of our life, effort than
we actually want to be at theexpense of what we want to do
and create in the world.
So I started seeing that costand I thought wait, this isn't
right.
I'm not being authentic, I'mnot being as courageous as I
want to be.
I'm not going to be silentanymore about the parts of
cultures that I'm not okay with.
(15:38):
I'm not going to let myself bedrained anymore by saying yes
and yes and yes, and I'm notgoing to be complacent as years
pass by while I serve somebodyelse's idea of becoming real, no
matter how much I believe in it.
I'm not going to do it becauseit feels more comfortable,
because I can tell that I'vedone it enough, that part of my
story is complete.
(15:59):
I've loved my time here, andthe only reason I'm here now is
because it's more comfortablethan what I know I need to do
next, because there's a wholeland inside of us full of magic,
full of fire, full of love andfull of moxie, and the reason
I'm so passionate aboutvocalizing this and about making
(16:25):
this episode about creatingspaces to pull out other
people's ideas is because thatquote in that book made me think
about my own work.
That's what it is for me.
The reason I've done everythingthat I've done this podcast,
the bloom room and why I createdthe Moxie Mastermind is because
(16:45):
I am passionate about creatingspaces where other women, other
people and specifically, otherwomen can let out their ideas
that they see in the world forhow the world could be a better
place.
They make their ideas real, notput their effort into making
somebody else's ideas real, notput their effort into taking
(17:06):
care of everybody else.
Because the world right now,with all the isms that we live
in this patriarchal structureand a capitalist structure,
structures full of racism and arejection of nature we need
strong feminine leadership.
We need strong feminine ideasmade real.
We need more and more of thoseideas.
(17:29):
So that's what I did.
I created the Moxie Mastermind,a space to nurse the Moxie out
of the fierce and tender womenin this world.
Their idea, your idea, your way.
What's your idea?
Maybe it's creating spaces,maybe it's just changing
something in your life.
Maybe it's changing somethingin a relationship in a family.
(17:50):
Maybe it's changing somethingin a relationship in a family.
Where is the place where yourpassion is whispering to you and
has been, maybe, for a while.
Two last questions for you here.
What is an idea that has beenwhispering to you?
Just take a moment and thinkabout that.
An idea for how your life orthe world, or a relationship
(18:17):
that you're in?
Or an idea for something youreally want to create and put
out there in the world ofbusiness, or a book, or a piece
of art or a community?
Where has that idea beenwhispering to you and you
haven't been giving it time orspace, because your time and
space is taken with somethingelse, either someone else's idea
or service.
And secondly, where are youworking too hard or giving too
(18:40):
much for someone else's idea,someone else's vision of the way
that things should be?
That's what I've got for youtoday.
I would love to hear from any ofyou that do this exercise and
find something, and until then,I will see you next week.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you got to come
(19:11):
and join us in the Bloom Room.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you gotta come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life.
In a community where we haveeach other's backs and we bring
out the best in each other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
I'll see you in the bloom room.
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