September 12, 2025 • 21 mins
In this episode of the Bloom Your Mind Podcast, we unpack the cycles of thought that either move us toward the life we want—or pull us away from it.
Just like a garden, our minds are always growing something. Some thoughts regenerate possibility and growth. Others are degenerative—reinforcing old, unhelpful beliefs and keeping us stuck. Today we’ll break down how that happens, how to recognize it, and most importantly, how to change it.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
- How regenerative vs. degenerative cycles actually work
- Why most of our thoughts are subconscious and programmed in without our control
- The role compassion plays in effectively changing our thought cycles
- Real-life examples of both degenerative and regenerative cycles
- A simple 5-minute practice to identify, interrupt and change thought cycles from degenerative to regenerative
- A ten second version to use on the fly
Resources & Links:
- Listen to the episode on Regenerative Design (for the full framework)
How to connect with Marie:
- On the Web | The Local Bloom
- Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
- All Things Marie on LinkTree
JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Well, hello everybody, andwelcome to episode number 144 of
(00:40):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
Oh my y'all, I'm coming in hotoff.
This week.
I was talking about this to theBloom Room group.
Today.
Lots of people in there weretalking about this too.
School started last week for mykids, and so now it's been what?
(01:02):
Three days?
Last week and yesterday it wasone day of school.
It's been four school days,with a weekend in between, and I
realized yesterday afternoonthat my nervous system was just
spiked.
It was like I'm at, I like,turned up to a higher frequency
than normal and I realized it isjust really wacky how fast
(01:25):
everything starts up again andhow big the transition is from
summer to the school year.
And what I've done since,realizing that I was like kind
of anxious and like jittery, andI'm usually not like that and
so what I've done is I'vestarted planting in more
meditation moments, like in themorning, I meditate before
(01:46):
anybody wakes up, I have alittle candle, I meditate, I
ground and I've planted some ofthose throughout my day and it's
really helping me.
So I'm just here to normalizefor anybody else out there.
If you are transitioning,either if you're listening to
this real time or you're at adifferent time of year and
things are moving it is totallyokay to take a moment to notice
(02:10):
your nervous system and yourbody and adjust your schedule,
adjust your daily practices, andI highly recommend adding in
some of those moments ofmindfulness or moments to
complete the stress cycle whereyou actually jump up and down
and shake a little bit, you takea walk, you just like shake it
(02:32):
out so that you can get some ofwhat we bottle up in our bodies
out.
All right, that's enough aboutthat.
Today we are talking aboutregenerative thinking.
So true to the name of theBloom your Mind podcast.
I have kind of a bloom yourmind life where I have about a
billion growing things in myworld, or at least it feels like
that.
When it's time to water them,it takes me forever.
(02:53):
I have inside plants, I haveoutside plants.
My kids love to work on theoutside garden with me where we
grow stuff to eat.
My husband loves it too.
We cook it, we eat it and wegrow flowers to put in our house
In some years.
I mean, we really revamped thegarden during COVID because we
(03:14):
were home all the time togetherand so we breeded our front yard
ourselves.
We built this fence, we builtraised beds and we learned how
to garden.
I had this new huge amount offresh soil, like this magic soil
, from this place in my hometownthere's like fish emulsion in
(03:35):
it, rabbit droppings, like allof this magic stuff.
And that first year my gardenwent off with all that fresh
soil.
It was a riot of like zucchiniand basil and tomatoes flowers.
It was spilling over the edges.
It was everything grew likejack and the beanstalk in that
(03:57):
soil.
And then some years since thenit's been how many years?
Like five years since then.
Some years it's like that it'sbeautiful, and other years it's
a leggy, wilty mess.
I will go on vacation and Iwon't be tending it as often.
So I have really learned thatif I want to have a garden, if
we want to have a garden with myfamily, we got to tend it.
(04:20):
A garden needs daily attention.
I have to intercept the pests,pull the weeds, fight off the
white mold.
Because I live by the ocean, Ihave to prune so that the plants
grow in the direction that Iwant, instead of going buck wild
and choking each other out.
And I'm serious, they do that.
And I have to intentionallyplant things that I want to grow
(04:41):
right, because I'm going togrow them.
I'm going to tend them withcare.
They're going to turn intothings that I want to grow right
Because I'm going to grow them.
I'm going to tend them withcare.
They're going to turn intothings that I either want in my
kitchen or I don't.
And sure, in a perfect worldhey, an ideal world, a magical
fantasy world I would startevery single gardening season
with an entire fresh bed ofclean, nutrient-rich soil.
(05:05):
But I can't do that.
I mean, it would take anincredible amount of investment
to do that.
So I've only had that once.
The first time it was all newsoil, new fresh soil,
unadulterated.
Every other year I add new soilto the top, I work it in, I
take some out and I work withwhat the old soil is giving me
(05:27):
too.
And the reason I'm diving sohard into this metaphor is
because our brains likemetaphors as we understand
concepts.
And, speaking of our brains,they work.
Just like that garden.
Your brain is always growingsomething, thoughts are
constantly firing and all ofthose thoughts, those seeds
(05:48):
right, create cycles in yourlife.
I'm going to talk about whatthat looks like.
Some of those cycles areregenerative.
The thoughts start a wholecycle in your body, in your
behavior and your results thatbring you closer to the life
that you want.
It's like a little circle withthose arrows in between them.
It's a cycle.
There's also another cycle,same deal.
(06:09):
If you visualize this circle,you know, with the three arrows,
like a recycling circle, thatregenerative circle.
There's another one that'sdegenerative.
Some of our thinking cycleskeep us stuck, stir up anxiety,
erode self-worth, and what theydo is they create a cycle of
behavior and results thatreinforce that thinking and move
(06:33):
us backwards in our life,farther away from what we want.
So today we're going to talkabout how each of those types of
cycles work, how to recognizewhich one you're in and, most
importantly, what to do about it.
And what I love about thisconcept, y'all, is that you can
use the five-minute version ofthis reflection tool and develop
new, whole new levels ofawareness that will just change
(06:53):
your life, and I do not say thatlightly.
I don't know if you've heard mesay this is life-changing
before.
I do not say that lightly.
This practice has literallyenhanced every part of my life
understanding these cycles.
But also you can do the 10,second version as you're moving
through your day and just askyourself the cheat sheet version
(07:14):
, which sounds like I know mythoughts create cycles already.
If this thought is going toprove itself through and I know
that it's going to prove itselfthrough, and I know that it's
going to prove itself through mybehavior and the results, is
this thought going to beregenerative or degenerative?
If I keep thinking it, how's itgoing to show up in my life?
And while a deeper look isalways more insightful, we can
(07:38):
use this little quick look onthe fly too, just asking
ourselves is this degenerativeor regenerative?
First, if you listened, I wantto do a quick recap of
regenerative design.
If you listened to my episodeon regenerative design, you know
this idea.
Your energy flows out of youinto the things that you
(07:58):
invested in, in your ideas thatyou're trying to make real.
Then it comes back to you intime money, love, community
fulfillment, you name it.
Energy out, goes into the worldand comes back to you when you
put your energy, which is a veryfinite resource and the most
valuable one that we have ourtime and our attention right and
(08:19):
our money.
Our energy, time and attentionis what I mean by the most
important resource that you have.
When you put your energy intosomething that gives you equal
or greater energy back, that'sregenerative design.
It's reciprocal.
It feeds the machine which isyou.
When it drains you or gives yousomething you don't even want
(08:43):
in return, that's what we call adegenerative cycle, and the
same principle applies to ourthoughts.
So here's the loop and how thesethought cycles work.
You have a thought work.
You have a thought.
That thought creates a feelingin your body which drives
(09:04):
behavior.
Usually, the behavior matchesthe thought.
That behavior creates a resultand the result becomes evidence
that the original thought wastrue.
So it's a cycle where yoursubconscious bias is proving
your thoughts true over and overand over again by gaining
evidence of them, and I'm goingto break this down in a couple
(09:25):
of examples.
So the result becomes evidenceand your brain is like see, I
told you so, and the beliefgrows stronger.
When it's a negative beliefthat's running in the background
like software that we don'teven see and I don't know how
that stuff works.
It's just magic in thebackground, or even a negative
or less helpful belief that weare aware of.
(09:47):
That cycle is going to createthings we do not want in our
lives, and that's what I call adegenerative thought cycle or
degenerative thinking.
Most of this is happening inyour subconscious.
Psychologists estimate that themajority of our thoughts are not
only subconscious but also notreally our responsibility.
(10:07):
We didn't plant the seeds.
Psychologists estimate themajority of our thoughts we
didn't choose them.
Most are programmed by family,schools, media, body language.
We absorbed experiences welived.
The ones we heard out loud areeasier for us to identify and
catch.
We're like okay, that's abelief I heard said to me a
bunch of times.
So I know I have it.
(10:27):
But there are most of them onthe subconscious level are more
sneaky than that.
We absorbed them through all ofthat that I just named Body
language, experiences,observations, watching other
people we may not even realizethey're there.
So as we uncover the beliefs wegot to have compassion Super
(10:48):
important when we bringawareness to a degenerative
thinking cycle.
The only way it works is if wedo it with compassion, because
the thoughts are not your fault.
They're programmed in.
It's like weeds that blew infrom your neighbor's yard.
When you notice them, insteadof shaming yourself, just get
curious.
Oh hey, weed Didn't plant you,but I keep seeing you every year
(11:10):
and you're a little bit biggerevery time.
Here you are.
All right, let's see what'sgoing on.
That's where your agency lives.
All right, let's see what'sgoing on.
That's where your agency lives.
All right, let's break down acouple of degenerative cycles.
Number one let's say you havesome degenerative thinking going
on as you're trying to get anidea out into the world.
I see this one all the time withpeople, and so again, I want
(11:33):
you to just picture that circleof the thought, with a little
arrow going into the feeling,with a little arrow going into
the feeling, with a little arrowgoing into the behaviors,
another arrow going into theresults and those results going
right back into the thought,because we're gaining evidence,
our results are proving that thethought is true, strengthening
(11:54):
the belief.
It's a cycle that's going roundand round.
Okay, so the thought is I neverhave enough time, and this is
the one I hear all the time.
I see all the time I don't haveenough time, which creates a
feeling of kind of hopelessnessin our bodies and then out of
that hopelessness that comesfrom thinking I just never have
enough time.
We respond to everybody'srequests reactively.
(12:17):
I got to get this done rightnow.
Okay, wait, I don't even knowwhat else is on my plate I got
to get.
We're just responding andreacting.
Maybe we create a lot of plansbut then we never clear our
schedule and say no to enoughthings to actually execute on
the plans and then they kind ofpass by and we have to start
again in the planning mode.
So we stay stuck in ideageneration mode and in
(12:40):
reactivity, fulfilling everyoneelse's requests.
That's the behavior and theresult is that our days are full
of reactive action we're notcreating and that proves we
never have time.
So it strengthens the beliefthat it will never change.
We'll never have time.
We don't have time.
That's a degenerative thoughtcycle.
(13:01):
Second example a socialsituation.
Let's take the thought and youknow, sometimes this is on the
surface and really we can beaware of it.
Sometimes it's happeningsubconsciously.
Let's take the thought I don'tbelong.
Maybe it comes up a little bitdifferently for somebody else,
maybe it's they don't want mearound.
But we'll just take up the Idon't belong here, maybe the
(13:24):
feeling that that generates inour body is self-consciousness,
and out of thatself-consciousness that comes
from feeling like we don'tbelong, that people don't want
us around.
Maybe we don't approach peoplebecause we just assume they
don't want us to.
We avoid eye contact because wekind of feel self-conscious.
Our body language says keep out.
(13:44):
It's sort of aloof, and theresult is that people don't
invite us in because they thinkwe don't want to be invited in.
We seem aloof, and to ourbrains that proves that we don't
belong.
It reinforces the whole cycle,making it stronger and stronger.
So these cycles are going,they're rolling like wheels on a
car, and what we want to do isput on the brakes.
(14:10):
When we put on the brakes andwe start checking out these
cycles, we can flip them around,and I'm going to give you an
exercise in just a coupleminutes to do that.
We can flip them around, andI'm going to give you an
exercise in just a coupleminutes to do that.
So let's take an example,though, of how to flip both of
the examples that I gave you.
Let's say you saw thedegenerative cycle running in
your life, creating all kinds ofhavoc, because you did the
(14:31):
exercise that I'm going to giveto you in a minute and you
decide to interrupt it.
You start brainstorming ideasfor more helpful regenerative
thinking that would seedbehaviors and results that you
actually want in your life.
Okay, take two Same twoexamples, but with regenerative
(14:54):
thoughts put into the cycle.
So again, I can create time forwhat matters most.
Let's say that is aregenerative thought that you
want to prove itself true.
When you actually practice thatthought, I can create time for
what matters most and youbelieve it.
(15:14):
You're going to generate afeeling of empowerment.
You block off time for youridea in your calendar, you say
no to the requests that come inof your time and you don't allow
yourself to get distractedduring the day.
You block off little chunks oftime practicing the game of
inches, week after week, so thatyou make huge progress toward
(15:38):
the thing that is most importantto you, says you, the thing
that is aligned with your values, that's an expression of your
passion and your unique self inthe world.
And the result you progress.
You progress on the idea andyou gain evidence that you can
yes, you can make your idea realand you do have time for what
(16:02):
matters most, reinforcing thecycle that you can create time
for what matters most, seedingthe garden with the idea that
you want to make real, which is,you can create time for what
matters most.
All right, let's take the socialexample and flip it on its head
.
Let's say, instead of thinkingI don't belong, we just think
(16:26):
connection is possible.
For me too.
It's not like a sunshine anddaisies thought.
Connection's important to meand connection is possible.
And so maybe we're not feelinglike the most popular person in
the world, we're just feelingopen.
Because we're feeling open,because we're thinking
connection's possible, we smile,we approach people, our body
(16:51):
language is open.
It's like we're open forbusiness here.
We invite people over togatherings, we invite them to
hang out, we ask someone to takea hike with us, we text people
more.
We're like, oh, this personwould love to hear from me.
And if that's too far tobelieve, we think I'm going to
go for a connection here.
Connection won't happen withoutme.
I can't let it all depend onthe people around me and blame
(17:15):
them.
I need to be the catalyst here.
If connection's what I want andthe result is, people respond
and then connection happens,right, they respond and they
connect.
They walk up to you, they talkto you when you walk up to the
group to talk to them, theystart talking back to you, and
maybe it doesn't happen everytime, but the more you do it,
(17:37):
the more it happens and you gainevidence that you belong.
That connection is possible foryou.
That connection is within yoursphere of control and it feeds a
cycle that's regenerative inyour life, that creates more of
what you want.
We love it.
All right.
Here's the practice to turndegenerative thinking cycles
(18:02):
into regenerative thinkingcycles.
Think of an area where you'rechallenged right now.
Step one, step two write downall of your thoughts for five
minutes with no filter.
Stream of consciousness writeit out.
We call that a thought downloadNumber three.
Stream of consciousness writeit out.
We call that a thought downloadNumber three.
Underline a few that feel likeif you were gonna ask do I want
(18:23):
this to prove itself out incycles in my life?
Maybe it was like nah, thisdoesn't seem super helpful.
Circle three or four of themand then map it through the
cycle.
What feeling does that thoughtcreate?
What are the behaviors thatcome from that thought and
feeling?
And what's the result thatproves and reinforces that
(18:44):
thinking?
How does it play out?
Then ask yourself is thisregenerative or degenerative?
If it's degenerative, tryreplacing it with a thought that
you want to prove true, onethat you can believe, and we'll
talk more about that next week.
Run that thought through thecycle.
What behavior would it spark?
What result might it create?
(19:04):
Do you like it?
Start practicing it.
Practice the thought until itgenerates the feeling in your
body and see what grows from it.
That's how you start reseedingyour mental garden and I swear
to you, my friends, if youpractice it diligently, you can
(19:25):
change and evolve all of theareas of your life with this
tool.
All right, so remember, yourbrain is always planting,
planting something.
Maybe they're weeds, maybethey're dandelions.
Maybe you want them, maybe youdon't.
Some are thorny.
Do you like this metaphor?
Am I choosing you out?
Some seeds grow fruit andflowers and some grow weeds.
(19:46):
Right, it's just, we're going togrow things.
It's a matter of askingourselves is it what we want?
We don't need to have a freshstart, and in fact, that is not
even on the table.
We just need to, withcompassion, start bringing
awareness to what's growing.
What are the thoughts that arecycling all over the time in our
(20:06):
mind?
You have the beautiful brainthat you have.
You have lived the unique lifethat got you here, and I'm so
grateful that you've had all ofthose experiences that make you
you and you're here with me now.
All you need to do next isnotice what's growing, pull the
(20:26):
weeds that are not serving youout with compassion so that they
stop eroding the things thatyou want to do in your life and
instead seed new thoughts, theones that will create a
regenerative cycle for thethings you actually want to
harvest in your life, the thingsyou actually want to grow and
experience, and the beliefs thatyou want to be gaining evidence
(20:50):
for over and over and over,because they will strengthen as
you practice them.
Next episode, we'll go deeperinto how to evolve your thinking
over time, but for now, gocheck your garden.
It's growing in there.
All right, that's what I've gotfor you this week and I will
(21:13):
see you next week.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you've got to
come and join us in the BloomRoom.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
(21:38):
I'll see you in the bloom room.
Welcome to the Bloom your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified CoachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Well, hello everybody, andwelcome to episode number 144 of
(00:40):
the Bloom your Mind podcast.
Oh my y'all, I'm coming in hotoff.
This week.
I was talking about this to theBloom Room group.
Today.
Lots of people in there weretalking about this too.
School started last week for mykids, and so now it's been what?
(01:02):
Three days?
Last week and yesterday it wasone day of school.
It's been four school days,with a weekend in between, and I
realized yesterday afternoonthat my nervous system was just
spiked.
It was like I'm at, I like,turned up to a higher frequency
than normal and I realized it isjust really wacky how fast
(01:25):
everything starts up again andhow big the transition is from
summer to the school year.
And what I've done since,realizing that I was like kind
of anxious and like jittery, andI'm usually not like that and
so what I've done is I'vestarted planting in more
meditation moments, like in themorning, I meditate before
(01:46):
anybody wakes up, I have alittle candle, I meditate, I
ground and I've planted some ofthose throughout my day and it's
really helping me.
So I'm just here to normalizefor anybody else out there.
If you are transitioning,either if you're listening to
this real time or you're at adifferent time of year and
things are moving it is totallyokay to take a moment to notice
(02:10):
your nervous system and yourbody and adjust your schedule,
adjust your daily practices, andI highly recommend adding in
some of those moments ofmindfulness or moments to
complete the stress cycle whereyou actually jump up and down
and shake a little bit, you takea walk, you just like shake it
(02:32):
out so that you can get some ofwhat we bottle up in our bodies
out.
All right, that's enough aboutthat.
Today we are talking aboutregenerative thinking.
So true to the name of theBloom your Mind podcast.
I have kind of a bloom yourmind life where I have about a
billion growing things in myworld, or at least it feels like
that.
When it's time to water them,it takes me forever.
(02:53):
I have inside plants, I haveoutside plants.
My kids love to work on theoutside garden with me where we
grow stuff to eat.
My husband loves it too.
We cook it, we eat it and wegrow flowers to put in our house
In some years.
I mean, we really revamped thegarden during COVID because we
(03:14):
were home all the time togetherand so we breeded our front yard
ourselves.
We built this fence, we builtraised beds and we learned how
to garden.
I had this new huge amount offresh soil, like this magic soil
, from this place in my hometownthere's like fish emulsion in
(03:35):
it, rabbit droppings, like allof this magic stuff.
And that first year my gardenwent off with all that fresh
soil.
It was a riot of like zucchiniand basil and tomatoes flowers.
It was spilling over the edges.
It was everything grew likejack and the beanstalk in that
(03:57):
soil.
And then some years since thenit's been how many years?
Like five years since then.
Some years it's like that it'sbeautiful, and other years it's
a leggy, wilty mess.
I will go on vacation and Iwon't be tending it as often.
So I have really learned thatif I want to have a garden, if
we want to have a garden with myfamily, we got to tend it.
(04:20):
A garden needs daily attention.
I have to intercept the pests,pull the weeds, fight off the
white mold.
Because I live by the ocean, Ihave to prune so that the plants
grow in the direction that Iwant, instead of going buck wild
and choking each other out.
And I'm serious, they do that.
And I have to intentionallyplant things that I want to grow
(04:41):
right, because I'm going togrow them.
I'm going to tend them withcare.
They're going to turn intothings that I want to grow right
Because I'm going to grow them.
I'm going to tend them withcare.
They're going to turn intothings that I either want in my
kitchen or I don't.
And sure, in a perfect worldhey, an ideal world, a magical
fantasy world I would startevery single gardening season
with an entire fresh bed ofclean, nutrient-rich soil.
(05:05):
But I can't do that.
I mean, it would take anincredible amount of investment
to do that.
So I've only had that once.
The first time it was all newsoil, new fresh soil,
unadulterated.
Every other year I add new soilto the top, I work it in, I
take some out and I work withwhat the old soil is giving me
(05:27):
too.
And the reason I'm diving sohard into this metaphor is
because our brains likemetaphors as we understand
concepts.
And, speaking of our brains,they work.
Just like that garden.
Your brain is always growingsomething, thoughts are
constantly firing and all ofthose thoughts, those seeds
(05:48):
right, create cycles in yourlife.
I'm going to talk about whatthat looks like.
Some of those cycles areregenerative.
The thoughts start a wholecycle in your body, in your
behavior and your results thatbring you closer to the life
that you want.
It's like a little circle withthose arrows in between them.
It's a cycle.
There's also another cycle,same deal.
(06:09):
If you visualize this circle,you know, with the three arrows,
like a recycling circle, thatregenerative circle.
There's another one that'sdegenerative.
Some of our thinking cycleskeep us stuck, stir up anxiety,
erode self-worth, and what theydo is they create a cycle of
behavior and results thatreinforce that thinking and move
(06:33):
us backwards in our life,farther away from what we want.
So today we're going to talkabout how each of those types of
cycles work, how to recognizewhich one you're in and, most
importantly, what to do about it.
And what I love about thisconcept, y'all, is that you can
use the five-minute version ofthis reflection tool and develop
new, whole new levels ofawareness that will just change
(06:53):
your life, and I do not say thatlightly.
I don't know if you've heard mesay this is life-changing
before.
I do not say that lightly.
This practice has literallyenhanced every part of my life
understanding these cycles.
But also you can do the 10,second version as you're moving
through your day and just askyourself the cheat sheet version
(07:14):
, which sounds like I know mythoughts create cycles already.
If this thought is going toprove itself through and I know
that it's going to prove itselfthrough, and I know that it's
going to prove itself through mybehavior and the results, is
this thought going to beregenerative or degenerative?
If I keep thinking it, how's itgoing to show up in my life?
And while a deeper look isalways more insightful, we can
(07:38):
use this little quick look onthe fly too, just asking
ourselves is this degenerativeor regenerative?
First, if you listened, I wantto do a quick recap of
regenerative design.
If you listened to my episodeon regenerative design, you know
this idea.
Your energy flows out of youinto the things that you
(07:58):
invested in, in your ideas thatyou're trying to make real.
Then it comes back to you intime money, love, community
fulfillment, you name it.
Energy out, goes into the worldand comes back to you when you
put your energy, which is a veryfinite resource and the most
valuable one that we have ourtime and our attention right and
(08:19):
our money.
Our energy, time and attentionis what I mean by the most
important resource that you have.
When you put your energy intosomething that gives you equal
or greater energy back, that'sregenerative design.
It's reciprocal.
It feeds the machine which isyou.
When it drains you or gives yousomething you don't even want
(08:43):
in return, that's what we call adegenerative cycle, and the
same principle applies to ourthoughts.
So here's the loop and how thesethought cycles work.
You have a thought work.
You have a thought.
That thought creates a feelingin your body which drives
(09:04):
behavior.
Usually, the behavior matchesthe thought.
That behavior creates a resultand the result becomes evidence
that the original thought wastrue.
So it's a cycle where yoursubconscious bias is proving
your thoughts true over and overand over again by gaining
evidence of them, and I'm goingto break this down in a couple
(09:25):
of examples.
So the result becomes evidenceand your brain is like see, I
told you so, and the beliefgrows stronger.
When it's a negative beliefthat's running in the background
like software that we don'teven see and I don't know how
that stuff works.
It's just magic in thebackground, or even a negative
or less helpful belief that weare aware of.
(09:47):
That cycle is going to createthings we do not want in our
lives, and that's what I call adegenerative thought cycle or
degenerative thinking.
Most of this is happening inyour subconscious.
Psychologists estimate that themajority of our thoughts are not
only subconscious but also notreally our responsibility.
(10:07):
We didn't plant the seeds.
Psychologists estimate themajority of our thoughts we
didn't choose them.
Most are programmed by family,schools, media, body language.
We absorbed experiences welived.
The ones we heard out loud areeasier for us to identify and
catch.
We're like okay, that's abelief I heard said to me a
bunch of times.
So I know I have it.
(10:27):
But there are most of them onthe subconscious level are more
sneaky than that.
We absorbed them through all ofthat that I just named Body
language, experiences,observations, watching other
people we may not even realizethey're there.
So as we uncover the beliefs wegot to have compassion Super
(10:48):
important when we bringawareness to a degenerative
thinking cycle.
The only way it works is if wedo it with compassion, because
the thoughts are not your fault.
They're programmed in.
It's like weeds that blew infrom your neighbor's yard.
When you notice them, insteadof shaming yourself, just get
curious.
Oh hey, weed Didn't plant you,but I keep seeing you every year
(11:10):
and you're a little bit biggerevery time.
Here you are.
All right, let's see what'sgoing on.
That's where your agency lives.
All right, let's see what'sgoing on.
That's where your agency lives.
All right, let's break down acouple of degenerative cycles.
Number one let's say you havesome degenerative thinking going
on as you're trying to get anidea out into the world.
I see this one all the time withpeople, and so again, I want
(11:33):
you to just picture that circleof the thought, with a little
arrow going into the feeling,with a little arrow going into
the feeling, with a little arrowgoing into the behaviors,
another arrow going into theresults and those results going
right back into the thought,because we're gaining evidence,
our results are proving that thethought is true, strengthening
(11:54):
the belief.
It's a cycle that's going roundand round.
Okay, so the thought is I neverhave enough time, and this is
the one I hear all the time.
I see all the time I don't haveenough time, which creates a
feeling of kind of hopelessnessin our bodies and then out of
that hopelessness that comesfrom thinking I just never have
enough time.
We respond to everybody'srequests reactively.
(12:17):
I got to get this done rightnow.
Okay, wait, I don't even knowwhat else is on my plate I got
to get.
We're just responding andreacting.
Maybe we create a lot of plansbut then we never clear our
schedule and say no to enoughthings to actually execute on
the plans and then they kind ofpass by and we have to start
again in the planning mode.
So we stay stuck in ideageneration mode and in
(12:40):
reactivity, fulfilling everyoneelse's requests.
That's the behavior and theresult is that our days are full
of reactive action we're notcreating and that proves we
never have time.
So it strengthens the beliefthat it will never change.
We'll never have time.
We don't have time.
That's a degenerative thoughtcycle.
(13:01):
Second example a socialsituation.
Let's take the thought and youknow, sometimes this is on the
surface and really we can beaware of it.
Sometimes it's happeningsubconsciously.
Let's take the thought I don'tbelong.
Maybe it comes up a little bitdifferently for somebody else,
maybe it's they don't want mearound.
But we'll just take up the Idon't belong here, maybe the
(13:24):
feeling that that generates inour body is self-consciousness,
and out of thatself-consciousness that comes
from feeling like we don'tbelong, that people don't want
us around.
Maybe we don't approach peoplebecause we just assume they
don't want us to.
We avoid eye contact because wekind of feel self-conscious.
Our body language says keep out.
(13:44):
It's sort of aloof, and theresult is that people don't
invite us in because they thinkwe don't want to be invited in.
We seem aloof, and to ourbrains that proves that we don't
belong.
It reinforces the whole cycle,making it stronger and stronger.
So these cycles are going,they're rolling like wheels on a
car, and what we want to do isput on the brakes.
(14:10):
When we put on the brakes andwe start checking out these
cycles, we can flip them around,and I'm going to give you an
exercise in just a coupleminutes to do that.
We can flip them around, andI'm going to give you an
exercise in just a coupleminutes to do that.
So let's take an example,though, of how to flip both of
the examples that I gave you.
Let's say you saw thedegenerative cycle running in
your life, creating all kinds ofhavoc, because you did the
(14:31):
exercise that I'm going to giveto you in a minute and you
decide to interrupt it.
You start brainstorming ideasfor more helpful regenerative
thinking that would seedbehaviors and results that you
actually want in your life.
Okay, take two Same twoexamples, but with regenerative
(14:54):
thoughts put into the cycle.
So again, I can create time forwhat matters most.
Let's say that is aregenerative thought that you
want to prove itself true.
When you actually practice thatthought, I can create time for
what matters most and youbelieve it.
(15:14):
You're going to generate afeeling of empowerment.
You block off time for youridea in your calendar, you say
no to the requests that come inof your time and you don't allow
yourself to get distractedduring the day.
You block off little chunks oftime practicing the game of
inches, week after week, so thatyou make huge progress toward
(15:38):
the thing that is most importantto you, says you, the thing
that is aligned with your values, that's an expression of your
passion and your unique self inthe world.
And the result you progress.
You progress on the idea andyou gain evidence that you can
yes, you can make your idea realand you do have time for what
(16:02):
matters most, reinforcing thecycle that you can create time
for what matters most, seedingthe garden with the idea that
you want to make real, which is,you can create time for what
matters most.
All right, let's take the socialexample and flip it on its head
.
Let's say, instead of thinkingI don't belong, we just think
(16:26):
connection is possible.
For me too.
It's not like a sunshine anddaisies thought.
Connection's important to meand connection is possible.
And so maybe we're not feelinglike the most popular person in
the world, we're just feelingopen.
Because we're feeling open,because we're thinking
connection's possible, we smile,we approach people, our body
(16:51):
language is open.
It's like we're open forbusiness here.
We invite people over togatherings, we invite them to
hang out, we ask someone to takea hike with us, we text people
more.
We're like, oh, this personwould love to hear from me.
And if that's too far tobelieve, we think I'm going to
go for a connection here.
Connection won't happen withoutme.
I can't let it all depend onthe people around me and blame
(17:15):
them.
I need to be the catalyst here.
If connection's what I want andthe result is, people respond
and then connection happens,right, they respond and they
connect.
They walk up to you, they talkto you when you walk up to the
group to talk to them, theystart talking back to you, and
maybe it doesn't happen everytime, but the more you do it,
(17:37):
the more it happens and you gainevidence that you belong.
That connection is possible foryou.
That connection is within yoursphere of control and it feeds a
cycle that's regenerative inyour life, that creates more of
what you want.
We love it.
All right.
Here's the practice to turndegenerative thinking cycles
(18:02):
into regenerative thinkingcycles.
Think of an area where you'rechallenged right now.
Step one, step two write downall of your thoughts for five
minutes with no filter.
Stream of consciousness writeit out.
We call that a thought downloadNumber three.
Stream of consciousness writeit out.
We call that a thought downloadNumber three.
Underline a few that feel likeif you were gonna ask do I want
(18:23):
this to prove itself out incycles in my life?
Maybe it was like nah, thisdoesn't seem super helpful.
Circle three or four of themand then map it through the
cycle.
What feeling does that thoughtcreate?
What are the behaviors thatcome from that thought and
feeling?
And what's the result thatproves and reinforces that
(18:44):
thinking?
How does it play out?
Then ask yourself is thisregenerative or degenerative?
If it's degenerative, tryreplacing it with a thought that
you want to prove true, onethat you can believe, and we'll
talk more about that next week.
Run that thought through thecycle.
What behavior would it spark?
What result might it create?
(19:04):
Do you like it?
Start practicing it.
Practice the thought until itgenerates the feeling in your
body and see what grows from it.
That's how you start reseedingyour mental garden and I swear
to you, my friends, if youpractice it diligently, you can
(19:25):
change and evolve all of theareas of your life with this
tool.
All right, so remember, yourbrain is always planting,
planting something.
Maybe they're weeds, maybethey're dandelions.
Maybe you want them, maybe youdon't.
Some are thorny.
Do you like this metaphor?
Am I choosing you out?
Some seeds grow fruit andflowers and some grow weeds.
(19:46):
Right, it's just, we're going togrow things.
It's a matter of askingourselves is it what we want?
We don't need to have a freshstart, and in fact, that is not
even on the table.
We just need to, withcompassion, start bringing
awareness to what's growing.
What are the thoughts that arecycling all over the time in our
(20:06):
mind?
You have the beautiful brainthat you have.
You have lived the unique lifethat got you here, and I'm so
grateful that you've had all ofthose experiences that make you
you and you're here with me now.
All you need to do next isnotice what's growing, pull the
(20:26):
weeds that are not serving youout with compassion so that they
stop eroding the things thatyou want to do in your life and
instead seed new thoughts, theones that will create a
regenerative cycle for thethings you actually want to
harvest in your life, the thingsyou actually want to grow and
experience, and the beliefs thatyou want to be gaining evidence
(20:50):
for over and over and over,because they will strengthen as
you practice them.
Next episode, we'll go deeperinto how to evolve your thinking
over time, but for now, gocheck your garden.
It's growing in there.
All right, that's what I've gotfor you this week and I will
(21:13):
see you next week.
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you've got to
come and join us in the BloomRoom.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real, one idea at a time.
(21:38):
I'll see you in the bloom room.
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