October 31, 2025 • 21 mins
Individuality is one of the greatest freedoms of our culture—and also one of its biggest traps.
The beauty of individuality is that it allows us to hear our own desires, define our own values, and express our unique contribution to the world. It fuels creativity, innovation, and self-discovery. But when the desire to be original stops us from taking action, it becomes an Achilles’ heel.
In this episode, we talk about the tension between wanting to be original and wanting to be effective—and why the world needs you focused on the latter. Because when we obsess over originality, we make our ideas about us. But the truth is, it’s not about us. It’s about helping, contributing, and using our unique voices to make the world better.
You’ll hear stories, metaphors, and examples—from surgeons to songwriters, from small community groups to global change movements—that illustrate this truth: the fact that you do the thing matters infinitely more than it being one of a kind.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode
- The difference between originality (ego) and effectiveness (impact).
- Why your contribution matters more than how “unique” it is.
How chasing originality can paralyze creativity and delay action. - Why it’s more powerful to focus on helping, healing, and building than standing out.
- A metaphor for how our individual actions can collectively turn the tide of humanity—like a flock of birds shifting direction together.
Right now, the world feels heavy to many people. That’s exactly why your contribution matters. Every positive action you take—every group you start, every song you write, every piece of art, blog, class, or community you build—helps counterbalance the negative.
Your voice will land with someone that no one else’s can. Your work will reach people that no one else could reach. And when each of us focuses on being effective, we turn the whole flock toward something better—one small action at a time.
Be one of the birds that turns the flock. Get your idea going. The world needs what you have to give.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Episode 1: You’re the one we want
- The Moxie Mastermind — for women turning their ideas into real, world-changing projects.
- Harvard Happiness Study — the link between contribution, connection, and well-being.
How to connect with Marie:
- On the Web | The Local Bloom
- Instagram: @the.bloom.coach
- All Things Marie on LinkTree
JOIN THE BLOOM ROOM!
We'll take all these ideas and apply them to our lives. Follow me on Instagram at @the.bloom.coach to learn more and snag a spot in my group coaching program!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:08):
Welcome to the Bloom Your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified coachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Hello everyone, and welcome toepisode number 150 of the Bloom
(00:33):
Your Mind podcast.
What?
150.
That's a milestone, right?
I mean, just because it's a thenumber 150.
I don't know.
Seems amazing to me.
So congratulations to us forbeing here together.
I am gonna start this intro withthe most random thing that has
(00:54):
been making me so happy, butthat also the reason that I'm
sharing it here, I've actuallythought about this for a few
weeks about sharing this on thepodcast is because I think it's
really a way that families andpeople that live together or
work together can kick off theirdays in a way that feels really
(01:16):
good and wonderful andconnecting.
And the reason that I bring thisup is because there are lots of
things when we wake up in themorning and when we get home
from work at night that I coachpeople on.
Lots of things that get in ourway that make our brain spin,
that make us feel stressed.
So if we take the morning, forexample, when we're sleeping,
(01:39):
I've said this many times on thepodcast, but when we're
sleeping, we don't have ourconscious mind there present as
a filter to filter through allof the automatic stuff that
comes up.
We know this, right?
We dream, we have weird dreams.
We wake up in the morning, we'relike, what was that dream?
All kinds of things come up inthe night that are like our
(02:01):
unconscious mind having a party.
We also, some of us, when we'restressed, will wake up in the
middle of the night and ourbrains are kind of spinning on
something because we don't haveour conscious mind ready to go
to like clamp down on thosethings and push our feelings
down, right?
So they're there.
When we wake up first thing inthe morning, we might have more
(02:22):
negative feelings, more negativethoughts, because that negative
bias that our brain has has beenrunning all night long.
The unconscious stuff has beenrunning all night long.
It won't happen to us everymorning, probably.
It won't happen to everyone.
But that is one thing thatpeople tend to experience is
that morning brain that's alittle bit rough.
(02:43):
Another thing that people tendto experience is a struggle
around what to do first thing inthe morning.
Do they like sit and meditate ordo they hop right on their
phone?
And when people get right ontotheir phone, they describe
feeling really stressed outright away because there might
be a bunch of emails or news orpop-ups that just immediately
(03:04):
send our brain into stress,anxiety, worry, all those
things.
Maybe we wake up in the morningand we're just like, I've got a
big day ahead of me, and it'slike go, go, go, and we're
really tired.
There's lots of things that canhappen in the morning that can
start our day off kind ofdisconnected and stressed.
(03:24):
And the other thing I hear isthat in the evenings, when
people get home from whatever,wherever they've been in their
day, it can feel similar.
They have been through astressful day, they've been
having a lot of work or a lot ofresponsibilities or whatever
happened during the day, theywalk in the door and there's
just a lot to do.
I specifically hear adults whoare responsible for children
(03:48):
feeling this way, where they getin the door and there's just so
much to take care of at homethat it just feels like nonstop.
So here's a little thing that meand my family do that really
helps us with this.
And I'm gonna tell you where Ilearned it first.
I was watching a naturedocumentary on a pack of wild
(04:11):
dogs.
What was this documentary?
Dang it.
I can't remember exactly whatthe name was.
I'll try to find it and put itin the show notes.
But it was about that, likehoned in on a different type of
animal on each episode.
And my family and I werewatching it and we really loved
it.
And there was this, I think itwas called, I think it was
(04:32):
something about baby animals.
Anyways, there was this wholeepisode about wild dogs.
When this pack of wild dogsfirst woke up when the sun arose
over the horizon, it was like inAfrica, these like native dogs
that were running around inthese packs, right?
(04:53):
The sun rose.
And the first thing they woulddo when they would wake up is
they would go around to everysingle member of their pack and
wrestle or snuggle to say hellobefore doing anything else.
I mean, maybe they did the downdog stretch, who knows?
But they took a minute, nomatter how many dogs were in
(05:15):
their pack, that's what they didevery single morning.
And what my family does everysingle morning is we each go
around to every single member ofthe family and greet each other
and say, Good morning.
How did you sleep?
I often tell my kids, I'm sohappy to see you this morning
(05:36):
when they open their eyes.
Before all of the what are wemaking for breakfast?
What time do we need to be outthe door?
All of that happens.
And that slowing down andlooking in each other's eyes and
(05:59):
grounding and and with our bodylanguage, with our tone, maybe
with our words, saying, You areimportant to me, you're awake,
hello, you're here, really setsoff all of our days in a really
wonderful way.
Bonus for me if there's lots ofsnuggling.
(06:20):
I love to snuggle my people.
And then the same thing when weget home in the evening, instead
of rushing right into whateverhas to happen first, there's a
greeting of each individual anda real moment of stillness
that's like, hi, how was yourday?
Where are you at?
That moment of focus that saysyou're important to me.
(06:43):
And I think that that issomething that you can do in
work environments too, or incommunity environments where you
just pause before getting intoeverything and do the pack of
wild dogs move where you greeteach member of the community
with reverence and love.
(07:06):
And I think always for me, Ilike attaching things to humor
or to a mnemonic device or amemory device.
And that one is really fun forme because I always just take a
little flash and thinking aboutus as a pack of wild dogs, and
especially when I greet myactual dog in the morning.
I'm like, you're so stoked.
We're acting just like yourpeople.
So feel free to use the wilddogs move if you're not using it
(07:29):
yet.
All right.
Today we're talking about beingoriginal because individuality
is one of the great freedoms ofthe culture that we live in and
also one of its weaknesses.
And this comes up for the peoplethat I coach a lot.
And it came up in the bloomroom.
We had such a great discussionabout it.
And I love this topic.
And I also started this podcastwith this topic.
(07:53):
I started this entire podcastwith episode one that was about
your unique voice.
That episode is called You'rethe One We Want.
And I brought in one of myfavorite philosophers, Kaja
Silverman, who's up fromBerkeley, and her philosophy of
how the subjectivity of theworld is objectively intended,
(08:15):
meaning when whatever we see,whatever we say, whatever we
notice as we walk around in ourunique shoes, in our unique
bodies, and filtered by the setof experiences that we have had,
what we can see and say andcreate helps make the world a
better place.
It helps when we can saysomething is beautiful, that
(08:36):
thing is more realized in itspotential because we saw it and
we said that.
And I love that wholephilosophy.
I love that idea ofindividuality.
That strength comes because itmeans this part of our culture,
this idea that we are allindividuals, creates this great
strength because we can find ourown way, our own voice.
(08:59):
We can figure out what ourcontribution to the world is
going to be on our terms.
Where do we want our deeppassion to meet the world's
needs?
We can hear our own desires, wecan find our own values.
The fact that we have thatfreedom is an absolutely
(09:19):
beautiful thing.
And it has led and will continueto lead to all kinds of
creativity and innovation.
And when we take it too far, itis also an Achilles heel.
When our desire to be unique anddifferent stops us from taking
action, it's time to pause.
(09:39):
When our need to stand out or tobe remarkable becomes more
important to us thancontributing to humanity or our
communities, it's time to pause.
When we stay stuck in secondguessing ourselves because our
idea isn't original enough, itstops us from having ideas about
the world around us and turningthem into real things.
(10:02):
Because we're making it aboutus.
And it's not about us.
Yes, we are unique andbeautiful, and we can say
something that has never beensaid before.
We can create things that no oneelse will ever create because we
are a unique being that ishappening once ever in this body
(10:23):
with this face and this voicewith these lived experiences.
And everyone else is unique too.
And we are a part of that wholeof all the others that we're
connected with, that we'reliving in this period of time
with, and we are responsible forhumanity just like everybody
else is.
So our contribution has to getout there.
(10:44):
Whatever it is, maybe ourcontribution is just living our
life in a beautiful way withintegrity.
Maybe it's something else thatis an invitation for other
people to step into.
Contributions come in alldifferent shapes and sizes.
And I keep hearing about whatdark times these are and how
hard it is to see the worldaround us and what's happening
(11:07):
and how divisive it all is.
And it is hard.
I see that.
I hear you.
I hear everyone saying that.
I hear the truth of it.
And that is exactly why we needevery single person doing
something.
Taking all that energy thatcomes from hard and instead of
making it part of what createsmore hard because we're
(11:28):
attacking each other and we'recomplaining and we're upset and
we're doom scrolling and we'rehopeless.
We need every single persontaking the opposite approach.
What can I do with my uniquegifts and my talents and my
passion that will help us?
That is exactly why we needevery single person doing
(11:48):
something.
Something to make your world,your own life, yourself a better
person, more evolved, moreclear, healing your own self or
your community, your own littlefamily or community, or the
larger world, any of thosethings, a better place.
Healing any on any level helps.
(12:10):
So let's talk some more aboutthis idea that gets in the way
of that happening.
This idea that we have to betotally unique.
I coach on it all the time, andI'm just not having it anymore.
Okay, listen to this.
If we want to start thinkingabout this, what if doctors went
through medical school and thenthey just wanted where they were
(12:33):
really trying hard to beoriginal?
That would not be a good idea,right?
Where would medicine be?
We don't want a surgeon toprioritize their unique flair or
like their signature and theirstitch-up.
We want a surgeon to do what ismost effective.
What is proven to work again andagain.
We want them paying attention towhat works, not how they can do
(12:56):
it differently.
We don't want doctors trying todo things a little differently
every time.
We want them to help us.
We want them to do it well.
Yes, innovation is great, butnot at the risk of
effectiveness.
Original versus effective,right?
Original comes from the ego.
(13:16):
I really need this to beoriginal.
I need it to be from myindividual identity and stand
out in the crowd.
I need it to be mine.
That comes from ego.
It's okay.
It's okay.
We all have that, right?
Most of us do.
But just being able to see it,oh my gosh, I'm trying so hard
to be original at the risk of myeven getting out there and
(13:39):
helping people or beingeffective.
Being effective is about helpingpeople.
Being effective is aboutbringing your idea into the
world in a way that works.
So original comes from ego.
Effectiveness is gonna helppeople, is gonna work.
And it's not just true fordoctors or engineers, whatever.
(13:59):
The same is true for starting acommunity group.
You can do the exact samecommunity group that tons of
other people have done before,and it will have an amazing
possibility for impacting yourworld, your people's world, your
community, the big world.
Writing a book, starting abusiness, making music, making a
movie, starting a YouTubechannel, hiking club, women's
group, a blog.
(14:21):
The fact that you do it is somuch more important than it
being one of a kind.
You doing it creates a wave ofimpact that helps your life,
your well-being, and the livesand the well-being of others.
Because we're like that kind of,I don't even know what kind of
flock of birds this is, but thatkind of flock of birds that you
see where one of them turnsdirection, and then you see it
(14:44):
like the it's almost like itlooks like virtual reality or
something, like the whole flockthen turns direction, one
direction and another, and theytilt and they all follow each
other because each bird in theflock is impacted by the very
small minutiae in the turns andcurves of the wings of the birds
next to them.
(15:06):
They're all following each otherand going next to each other,
right?
That's all of us.
We're each doing that.
Every single one of us thatworks on ourselves, tries to
make ourselves better, moreclean, more clear, better
communicators, more loving,healing our wounds and getting
ourselves to a better place.
(15:26):
Or that creates something in theworld to make the world a better
place or to contribute to ourcommunities.
We're each tilting our wing alittle bit and being part of
that curve, part of that changeof direction, that direction
away from taking out ourfrustrations on one another and
toward putting our time and ourfocus, our life's energy into
(15:47):
something that will turn ourlives and the world into a
better place to be.
Because we got to counterbalancethe negative.
We got to turn that tide.
And every single one of us whois turning our wings in the
direction of doing somethinggood in the world, is gonna
counterbalance all of thenegative that's out there.
(16:08):
So no matter how original it is,it just matters that it exists.
Right?
Because think of every personout there trolling on the
internet because they aren'tbeing influenced into doing
something more positive andconstructive with their time.
Every person who's lonely,wondering if they're weird and
dysfunctional because of theirstruggles, when a group that you
could start or something youcould write or say or create
(16:32):
could help them know they arenot alone.
Or a design company that getsout there and starts put putting
healthy fabrics and sustainableitems and locally sourced
materials into people's homes,or a theory course that gets
people on instruments andcreating and expressing
themselves and doing somethingconstructive with their hands
(16:53):
that builds confidence.
Or all of those people out therethat are having troubles in
relationships and could usecommunication skills that could
save their relationships or stopwars, and you could be the one
to teach them those things.
Or to embody those things.
We teach just by being, we teachjust by who we are, right?
(17:16):
We influence those around us.
Or maybe there's a piece ofclothing that you could make, a
business that you could startthat would inspire other people
to start businesses that arelocal or that are that are
inspired by passion or that areconscious, that have integrity.
Or you can make an app thatcould help someone with some
part of their idea that they'retrying to get off the ground.
(17:37):
It doesn't have to be original,you just have to do it.
Every single one of us can helpto turn that tide.
And by the way, your voice,whatever you create, will be
totally original because it'scoming from you.
It will land with someone thatno one else's idea can land
with.
We all resonate with differentpeople.
(17:59):
People that like my podcast, I'msure there are tons of people
that can't stand my podcast.
Beautiful.
Just go listen to somebody elsethat's teaching these things,
you know?
Like find the person or thepeople that resonate with you.
You are the person that willresonate with a certain number
of people out there.
(18:19):
We need you.
Either you or what you create.
The more of us that are creatingthings, the more chance we have
to land with enough people toturn the tide of this flock
towards people takingresponsibility for our thoughts,
our feelings, our actions, andwhat we're putting into the
(18:39):
world instead of blaming oneanother.
We will all appeal to differentpeople.
The more people out there tryingto do something with different
voices and faces and styles,even if they're all doing the
same thing, the better.
And there's so much information.
A new study just came out, ahappiness study that said the
(19:00):
number one thing, and I've, hey,by the way, I've presented
before that the number one thingin most happiness studies are
strong relationships.
A new one came out with adifferent answer, but generally
these are always the two.
But this one said the number onesource of happiness this study
found is that people who have asense of purpose in their life
(19:22):
have the happiest lives.
Purpose meaning I know I'mmaking an impact.
I know I'm contributingsomething to the world for my
authentic self that's helping.
I have a purpose, I have areason for being here, and it's
good, and I believe in it.
So for every single one of us,we need we need to be doing
(19:44):
that.
That's our job.
Contributing something to theworld from our unique self that
is an authentic expression thatmakes the world a better place.
That's what I want for all ofus.
So be one of those birds that'sturning the flock.
Get your idea going.
If you need help, come into theBloom Room or the Moxie
Mastermind.
(20:04):
That's what we do.
But no matter what, be one ofthe birds that gets your idea
out there, that turns the tide.
It doesn't need to be original.
It just needs to get out there.
That's what I've got for youtoday.
Happy 150.
I'll see you in episode 151.
(20:34):
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you gotta come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real.
(20:55):
One idea at a time.
Welcome to the Bloom Your Mind Podcast, where we take
all of your ideas for what youwant and we turn them into real
things.
I'm your host, certified coachMarie McDonald.
Let's get into it.
Hello everyone, and welcome toepisode number 150 of the Bloom
(00:33):
Your Mind podcast.
What?
150.
That's a milestone, right?
I mean, just because it's a thenumber 150.
I don't know.
Seems amazing to me.
So congratulations to us forbeing here together.
I am gonna start this intro withthe most random thing that has
(00:54):
been making me so happy, butthat also the reason that I'm
sharing it here, I've actuallythought about this for a few
weeks about sharing this on thepodcast is because I think it's
really a way that families andpeople that live together or
work together can kick off theirdays in a way that feels really
(01:16):
good and wonderful andconnecting.
And the reason that I bring thisup is because there are lots of
things when we wake up in themorning and when we get home
from work at night that I coachpeople on.
Lots of things that get in ourway that make our brain spin,
that make us feel stressed.
So if we take the morning, forexample, when we're sleeping,
(01:39):
I've said this many times on thepodcast, but when we're
sleeping, we don't have ourconscious mind there present as
a filter to filter through allof the automatic stuff that
comes up.
We know this, right?
We dream, we have weird dreams.
We wake up in the morning, we'relike, what was that dream?
All kinds of things come up inthe night that are like our
(02:01):
unconscious mind having a party.
We also, some of us, when we'restressed, will wake up in the
middle of the night and ourbrains are kind of spinning on
something because we don't haveour conscious mind ready to go
to like clamp down on thosethings and push our feelings
down, right?
So they're there.
When we wake up first thing inthe morning, we might have more
(02:22):
negative feelings, more negativethoughts, because that negative
bias that our brain has has beenrunning all night long.
The unconscious stuff has beenrunning all night long.
It won't happen to us everymorning, probably.
It won't happen to everyone.
But that is one thing thatpeople tend to experience is
that morning brain that's alittle bit rough.
(02:43):
Another thing that people tendto experience is a struggle
around what to do first thing inthe morning.
Do they like sit and meditate ordo they hop right on their
phone?
And when people get right ontotheir phone, they describe
feeling really stressed outright away because there might
be a bunch of emails or news orpop-ups that just immediately
(03:04):
send our brain into stress,anxiety, worry, all those
things.
Maybe we wake up in the morningand we're just like, I've got a
big day ahead of me, and it'slike go, go, go, and we're
really tired.
There's lots of things that canhappen in the morning that can
start our day off kind ofdisconnected and stressed.
(03:24):
And the other thing I hear isthat in the evenings, when
people get home from whatever,wherever they've been in their
day, it can feel similar.
They have been through astressful day, they've been
having a lot of work or a lot ofresponsibilities or whatever
happened during the day, theywalk in the door and there's
just a lot to do.
I specifically hear adults whoare responsible for children
(03:48):
feeling this way, where they getin the door and there's just so
much to take care of at homethat it just feels like nonstop.
So here's a little thing that meand my family do that really
helps us with this.
And I'm gonna tell you where Ilearned it first.
I was watching a naturedocumentary on a pack of wild
(04:11):
dogs.
What was this documentary?
Dang it.
I can't remember exactly whatthe name was.
I'll try to find it and put itin the show notes.
But it was about that, likehoned in on a different type of
animal on each episode.
And my family and I werewatching it and we really loved
it.
And there was this, I think itwas called, I think it was
(04:32):
something about baby animals.
Anyways, there was this wholeepisode about wild dogs.
When this pack of wild dogsfirst woke up when the sun arose
over the horizon, it was like inAfrica, these like native dogs
that were running around inthese packs, right?
(04:53):
The sun rose.
And the first thing they woulddo when they would wake up is
they would go around to everysingle member of their pack and
wrestle or snuggle to say hellobefore doing anything else.
I mean, maybe they did the downdog stretch, who knows?
But they took a minute, nomatter how many dogs were in
(05:15):
their pack, that's what they didevery single morning.
And what my family does everysingle morning is we each go
around to every single member ofthe family and greet each other
and say, Good morning.
How did you sleep?
I often tell my kids, I'm sohappy to see you this morning
(05:36):
when they open their eyes.
Before all of the what are wemaking for breakfast?
What time do we need to be outthe door?
All of that happens.
And that slowing down andlooking in each other's eyes and
(05:59):
grounding and and with our bodylanguage, with our tone, maybe
with our words, saying, You areimportant to me, you're awake,
hello, you're here, really setsoff all of our days in a really
wonderful way.
Bonus for me if there's lots ofsnuggling.
(06:20):
I love to snuggle my people.
And then the same thing when weget home in the evening, instead
of rushing right into whateverhas to happen first, there's a
greeting of each individual anda real moment of stillness
that's like, hi, how was yourday?
Where are you at?
That moment of focus that saysyou're important to me.
(06:43):
And I think that that issomething that you can do in
work environments too, or incommunity environments where you
just pause before getting intoeverything and do the pack of
wild dogs move where you greeteach member of the community
with reverence and love.
(07:06):
And I think always for me, Ilike attaching things to humor
or to a mnemonic device or amemory device.
And that one is really fun forme because I always just take a
little flash and thinking aboutus as a pack of wild dogs, and
especially when I greet myactual dog in the morning.
I'm like, you're so stoked.
We're acting just like yourpeople.
So feel free to use the wilddogs move if you're not using it
(07:29):
yet.
All right.
Today we're talking about beingoriginal because individuality
is one of the great freedoms ofthe culture that we live in and
also one of its weaknesses.
And this comes up for the peoplethat I coach a lot.
And it came up in the bloomroom.
We had such a great discussionabout it.
And I love this topic.
And I also started this podcastwith this topic.
(07:53):
I started this entire podcastwith episode one that was about
your unique voice.
That episode is called You'rethe One We Want.
And I brought in one of myfavorite philosophers, Kaja
Silverman, who's up fromBerkeley, and her philosophy of
how the subjectivity of theworld is objectively intended,
(08:15):
meaning when whatever we see,whatever we say, whatever we
notice as we walk around in ourunique shoes, in our unique
bodies, and filtered by the setof experiences that we have had,
what we can see and say andcreate helps make the world a
better place.
It helps when we can saysomething is beautiful, that
(08:36):
thing is more realized in itspotential because we saw it and
we said that.
And I love that wholephilosophy.
I love that idea ofindividuality.
That strength comes because itmeans this part of our culture,
this idea that we are allindividuals, creates this great
strength because we can find ourown way, our own voice.
(08:59):
We can figure out what ourcontribution to the world is
going to be on our terms.
Where do we want our deeppassion to meet the world's
needs?
We can hear our own desires, wecan find our own values.
The fact that we have thatfreedom is an absolutely
(09:19):
beautiful thing.
And it has led and will continueto lead to all kinds of
creativity and innovation.
And when we take it too far, itis also an Achilles heel.
When our desire to be unique anddifferent stops us from taking
action, it's time to pause.
(09:39):
When our need to stand out or tobe remarkable becomes more
important to us thancontributing to humanity or our
communities, it's time to pause.
When we stay stuck in secondguessing ourselves because our
idea isn't original enough, itstops us from having ideas about
the world around us and turningthem into real things.
(10:02):
Because we're making it aboutus.
And it's not about us.
Yes, we are unique andbeautiful, and we can say
something that has never beensaid before.
We can create things that no oneelse will ever create because we
are a unique being that ishappening once ever in this body
(10:23):
with this face and this voicewith these lived experiences.
And everyone else is unique too.
And we are a part of that wholeof all the others that we're
connected with, that we'reliving in this period of time
with, and we are responsible forhumanity just like everybody
else is.
So our contribution has to getout there.
(10:44):
Whatever it is, maybe ourcontribution is just living our
life in a beautiful way withintegrity.
Maybe it's something else thatis an invitation for other
people to step into.
Contributions come in alldifferent shapes and sizes.
And I keep hearing about whatdark times these are and how
hard it is to see the worldaround us and what's happening
(11:07):
and how divisive it all is.
And it is hard.
I see that.
I hear you.
I hear everyone saying that.
I hear the truth of it.
And that is exactly why we needevery single person doing
something.
Taking all that energy thatcomes from hard and instead of
making it part of what createsmore hard because we're
(11:28):
attacking each other and we'recomplaining and we're upset and
we're doom scrolling and we'rehopeless.
We need every single persontaking the opposite approach.
What can I do with my uniquegifts and my talents and my
passion that will help us?
That is exactly why we needevery single person doing
(11:48):
something.
Something to make your world,your own life, yourself a better
person, more evolved, moreclear, healing your own self or
your community, your own littlefamily or community, or the
larger world, any of thosethings, a better place.
Healing any on any level helps.
(12:10):
So let's talk some more aboutthis idea that gets in the way
of that happening.
This idea that we have to betotally unique.
I coach on it all the time, andI'm just not having it anymore.
Okay, listen to this.
If we want to start thinkingabout this, what if doctors went
through medical school and thenthey just wanted where they were
(12:33):
really trying hard to beoriginal?
That would not be a good idea,right?
Where would medicine be?
We don't want a surgeon toprioritize their unique flair or
like their signature and theirstitch-up.
We want a surgeon to do what ismost effective.
What is proven to work again andagain.
We want them paying attention towhat works, not how they can do
(12:56):
it differently.
We don't want doctors trying todo things a little differently
every time.
We want them to help us.
We want them to do it well.
Yes, innovation is great, butnot at the risk of
effectiveness.
Original versus effective,right?
Original comes from the ego.
(13:16):
I really need this to beoriginal.
I need it to be from myindividual identity and stand
out in the crowd.
I need it to be mine.
That comes from ego.
It's okay.
It's okay.
We all have that, right?
Most of us do.
But just being able to see it,oh my gosh, I'm trying so hard
to be original at the risk of myeven getting out there and
(13:39):
helping people or beingeffective.
Being effective is about helpingpeople.
Being effective is aboutbringing your idea into the
world in a way that works.
So original comes from ego.
Effectiveness is gonna helppeople, is gonna work.
And it's not just true fordoctors or engineers, whatever.
(13:59):
The same is true for starting acommunity group.
You can do the exact samecommunity group that tons of
other people have done before,and it will have an amazing
possibility for impacting yourworld, your people's world, your
community, the big world.
Writing a book, starting abusiness, making music, making a
movie, starting a YouTubechannel, hiking club, women's
group, a blog.
(14:21):
The fact that you do it is somuch more important than it
being one of a kind.
You doing it creates a wave ofimpact that helps your life,
your well-being, and the livesand the well-being of others.
Because we're like that kind of,I don't even know what kind of
flock of birds this is, but thatkind of flock of birds that you
see where one of them turnsdirection, and then you see it
(14:44):
like the it's almost like itlooks like virtual reality or
something, like the whole flockthen turns direction, one
direction and another, and theytilt and they all follow each
other because each bird in theflock is impacted by the very
small minutiae in the turns andcurves of the wings of the birds
next to them.
(15:06):
They're all following each otherand going next to each other,
right?
That's all of us.
We're each doing that.
Every single one of us thatworks on ourselves, tries to
make ourselves better, moreclean, more clear, better
communicators, more loving,healing our wounds and getting
ourselves to a better place.
(15:26):
Or that creates something in theworld to make the world a better
place or to contribute to ourcommunities.
We're each tilting our wing alittle bit and being part of
that curve, part of that changeof direction, that direction
away from taking out ourfrustrations on one another and
toward putting our time and ourfocus, our life's energy into
(15:47):
something that will turn ourlives and the world into a
better place to be.
Because we got to counterbalancethe negative.
We got to turn that tide.
And every single one of us whois turning our wings in the
direction of doing somethinggood in the world, is gonna
counterbalance all of thenegative that's out there.
(16:08):
So no matter how original it is,it just matters that it exists.
Right?
Because think of every personout there trolling on the
internet because they aren'tbeing influenced into doing
something more positive andconstructive with their time.
Every person who's lonely,wondering if they're weird and
dysfunctional because of theirstruggles, when a group that you
could start or something youcould write or say or create
(16:32):
could help them know they arenot alone.
Or a design company that getsout there and starts put putting
healthy fabrics and sustainableitems and locally sourced
materials into people's homes,or a theory course that gets
people on instruments andcreating and expressing
themselves and doing somethingconstructive with their hands
(16:53):
that builds confidence.
Or all of those people out therethat are having troubles in
relationships and could usecommunication skills that could
save their relationships or stopwars, and you could be the one
to teach them those things.
Or to embody those things.
We teach just by being, we teachjust by who we are, right?
(17:16):
We influence those around us.
Or maybe there's a piece ofclothing that you could make, a
business that you could startthat would inspire other people
to start businesses that arelocal or that are that are
inspired by passion or that areconscious, that have integrity.
Or you can make an app thatcould help someone with some
part of their idea that they'retrying to get off the ground.
(17:37):
It doesn't have to be original,you just have to do it.
Every single one of us can helpto turn that tide.
And by the way, your voice,whatever you create, will be
totally original because it'scoming from you.
It will land with someone thatno one else's idea can land
with.
We all resonate with differentpeople.
(17:59):
People that like my podcast, I'msure there are tons of people
that can't stand my podcast.
Beautiful.
Just go listen to somebody elsethat's teaching these things,
you know?
Like find the person or thepeople that resonate with you.
You are the person that willresonate with a certain number
of people out there.
(18:19):
We need you.
Either you or what you create.
The more of us that are creatingthings, the more chance we have
to land with enough people toturn the tide of this flock
towards people takingresponsibility for our thoughts,
our feelings, our actions, andwhat we're putting into the
(18:39):
world instead of blaming oneanother.
We will all appeal to differentpeople.
The more people out there tryingto do something with different
voices and faces and styles,even if they're all doing the
same thing, the better.
And there's so much information.
A new study just came out, ahappiness study that said the
(19:00):
number one thing, and I've, hey,by the way, I've presented
before that the number one thingin most happiness studies are
strong relationships.
A new one came out with adifferent answer, but generally
these are always the two.
But this one said the number onesource of happiness this study
found is that people who have asense of purpose in their life
(19:22):
have the happiest lives.
Purpose meaning I know I'mmaking an impact.
I know I'm contributingsomething to the world for my
authentic self that's helping.
I have a purpose, I have areason for being here, and it's
good, and I believe in it.
So for every single one of us,we need we need to be doing
(19:44):
that.
That's our job.
Contributing something to theworld from our unique self that
is an authentic expression thatmakes the world a better place.
That's what I want for all ofus.
So be one of those birds that'sturning the flock.
Get your idea going.
If you need help, come into theBloom Room or the Moxie
Mastermind.
(20:04):
That's what we do.
But no matter what, be one ofthe birds that gets your idea
out there, that turns the tide.
It doesn't need to be original.
It just needs to get out there.
That's what I've got for youtoday.
Happy 150.
I'll see you in episode 151.
(20:34):
If you like what you're hearingon the podcast, you gotta come
and join us in the Bloom Room.
This is a year-round membershipwhere we take all of these
concepts and we apply them toreal life in a community where
we have each other's backs andwe bring out the best in each
other.
We're all there to make ourideas real.
(20:55):
One idea at a time.
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