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August 24, 2022 29 mins

Do you regret decisions you didn’t make? 

Takeaways

  • If you really do feel regret, that likely means you really did want to make the other choice. If it’s something you can do again, like get a hair cut, go do it.
  • Be mindful of the choices and habits you have. Did you really “not have time” for something, or was it because of poor time management?
  • It’s okay to feel sad, disappointed, or guilty even over decisions or opportunities we feel passed us by but we can’t let those feelings keep us down.  
  • Find someone to talk to or journal about it if you feel yourself spiraling in despair. 
  • Trust in the timing of your life.  Even if you feel an opportunity passed you by, it just means you weren’t ready for it at that point in your life.  If it’s meant to be, it’ll find its way back to you. 
  • Think of it this way:  The decisions you made were part of your growth and it is all working for you, even if it doesn’t feel that way sometimes. 
  • Rather than comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to your own starting point.  Now acknowledge and celebrate all the progress you’ve made since then!
  • If you continue to regret something that you didn’t do, then take a leap and just try it.  You may realize by doing it, you have no interest.  But at least now you know.
  • Even if you don’t like where you are right now, you can be grateful for what you have done. If you feel “I haven’t done anything,” then even that too is a teacher, teaching you to go start doing things!
  • What’s meant for us, will never escape us. 
  • Jordan gives us the perfect example of regretting a perceived missed opportunity early on in life, but then finding its way back to her later in life. When she looks back, she realizes the timing of when she actually got that opportunity worked out so much better than if she tried to pursue it when younger.
  • When in doubt, write it out. 
  • When you feel like your thoughts are out of control, grab a journal and write it out. Dump out all the raw feelings or limiting thoughts. Get it out of your body and then tear it up and throw it away.  
  • Writing things out is cathartic. 
  • Use a journal to write about your desires and dreams and get excited about it.  
  • Create meaning out of your choices.  See the link to the Ted Talk
  • Our life circumstances are constantly changing. Go with the flow as you move through life and if our situation seems hard now, pause and take a breath. Remind yourself that situations can be improved.
  • Create positive what-ifs rather than regrettable ones.  Ex: What if everything is always working out for me? What if I was already a millionaire, what would I be doing right now?  What if I had fun with my friends every day? 
  • Find your joy regardless of what is happening in your external environment.  That joy will carry you through more challenging times. Peace of mind and heart is the goal.
  • luck = preparation + opportunity. Maybe if the job didn’t come to you, it wasn’t meant to be yours and you weren’t entirely spiritually/career-wise prepared enough.

Resources

  • https://www.ted.com/talks/ruth_chang_how_to_make_hard_choices?language=en

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