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November 11, 2024 • 9 mins

3 Lessons đź’ˇ

1) Measure yourself backwards, not forwards

  1. Start = where you were 90 days ago
  2. Achieved = what you’ve actually achieved in the last 90 days
  3. Ideal = where you wish you were
    • You’re in the GAP every time you measure yourself or your situation against an ideal
      • Being in the GAIN means you measure yourself backward, against where you were before
        • Every experience can be viewed as a GAIN in some way (even really really hard ones)
          • Transform negative experiences into lessons
  • Can continue measuring your gains on a weekly or monthly basis

2) Contrast the GAP and the GAIN

  • The GAP is based on an unhealthy “need” or attachment to something outside of yourself. GAP
  • When you’re in the GAIN, you’re completely free and happy right now. This enables you to commit 100% and pursue what you want without unhealthy attachments
  • How you frame an experience changed how your body processes the experience. It can be helpful to remind yourself and others what perspective, one of abundance and gratitude, or one of lack and needs, you're in
    • You can want something and be 100% committed to that thing without needing it. Can have both: Intense commitment to succeed and a healthy detachment from what you're doing
  • Ask yourself, your spouse or your kids – “Are you in the GAP or the GAIN right now?”

3) Inspiring Quotes

  • “You, and you alone, are the person who should take the measure of your own success. I do not try to be better than anyone else. I only try to be better than myself.” – Dan Jensen
  • “You are 100 percent disciplined to your existing set of habits.”
  • “Training yourself to be happy is completely internal. There is no external progress, no external validation. You’re competing against yourself, it is a single-player game.” – Naval Ravikant
  • “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” – Ernest Hemingway

3 Actions âś…

1) Journal on three wins: Today and Tomorrow

  • Write in your journal three WINS (or GAINS) from today and three goals for tomorrow. Accountability partners can boost your success!

2) Practice mental subtraction to remind yourself of the GAINS in your life

  • Select one specific thing to mentally subtract from your life
  • Imagine how your life would be if you never had it and how this thing is a huge GAIN in your life

3) Start one Tiny Habit

  • Suggested structure "After I ____, I will ______":
    • Ex. After I open my journal, I will immediately write about one GAIN in my life

Helpful Links:

Book Mentioned: "The Gap and the Gain: The High Achiever's Guide to Happiness, Confidence and Success" by Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy

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