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October 8, 2024 23 mins

In this episode, Jo and life coach Pam Howard discuss effective strategies for encouraging healthy nutrition habits --the cornerstone of building and maintaining a speedy metabolism--with our kids. Pam, a life and parenting coach, shares practical tips and insights from her experience as a mom and coach. The conversation covers five key do's and don'ts for instilling healthy habits, including avoiding the use of food as a reward, not forcing children to clean their plates, and creating a positive mealtime environment. Pam emphasizes the importance of setting a good example, involving kids in meal preparation, and being patient with the process.

Follow Pam at @lessdramamama and listen to her podcast Less Drama More Mama.

00:00 Introduction to Today's Topic
00:23 Meet Pam Howard: Life and Parenting Coach
01:35 The Do's and Don'ts of Children's Nutrition
02:12 Don'ts: Avoiding Common Pitfalls
12:21 Do's: Encouraging Healthy Habits
22:25 Conclusion and Final Thoughts


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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:03):
Hi everyone.
You've got Joe and today we havePam Howard with us.
Pam is a life and parentingcoach.
She hosts a podcast.
She has a book.
She has a coaching business.
Today's topic is going to be howto influence healthy nutrition
and exercise habits with yourchildren.
Some do's and don'ts.

(00:23):
Before we get into that, Pam, doyou want to introduce yourself?
Sure.
Thanks so much for having mehere.
I, like you said, I'm a lifecoach.
I'm also a licensed clinicalsocial worker in the state of
Florida, and I'm the mom of twoteenagers.
They're 14 and 18.
My older daughter graduatestomorrow from high school.
Very exciting.

(00:44):
And I help moms stop yelling attheir kids and feel calm and
confident in their parenting.
So they can.
Have the kind of relationshipsthat they want with their kids.
That's what I love to do.
And so I'm happy to be here.
And I am almost at a year and asa client in your program.
And that's been amazing too.

(01:06):
Yeah.
I can't wait to hear youradvice.
Do you want to tell people wherethey can find you?
Podcast in your book and yourInstagram and stuff before we
get started.
Okay.
So my website is called, mybusiness name is called less
drama, more mama.
And so that's the name of mypodcast, name of my book.
It's kind of everything.
So you can find me there.

(01:26):
And on Instagram it's less dramamama, but everywhere else it's
less drama, more mama.
Okay, great.
Okay.
So what do you got for us today?
Okay.
First, a disclaimer that I amnot a nutritionist.
I'm not a fitness coach orpediatrician or any of those
things.
So a lot of what I'm going toshare with you is based on,
things that I've experienced asa mom that I've helped other

(01:49):
that I've helped clients with.
And also just like.
Parenting best parentingpractices, but I know that this
will be a conversation betweenthe two of us.
Cause you have that nutritionand fitness background and
you're a mom yourself.
So we can talk through each ofthese things.
So I have five don'ts.
We're going to start with thedon'ts and then end with the

(02:09):
dues.
So five dues and five don'ts.
The first one is don't forceyour kids to eat or clean their
plates.
And a lot of these things I hadto learn as my kids were growing
up because I didn't know them inthe beginning.
So making kids finish everythingon their plate.
often backfires because itteaches kids to ignore their own

(02:30):
hunger and fullness signalswhich can lead to overeating and
unhealthy habits later on.
So we want to help them listento their bodies and eat until
they're satisfied, but notstuffed.
So a lot of moms, when I talkabout this, we'll say, yeah, but
that's a waste of food.
I don't want to waste food.
So My answer to that would betry serving smaller portions.

(02:53):
Okay.
If they're still hungry, theycan go back for more save your
leftovers.
You can get really creative withleftovers and to change your
mindset around it from this is awaste to.
This is an investment in mychild's health and being, right?
Like a little bit of food thatyou throw away is a small price
to pay for teaching your kids afoundation of healthy eating.

(03:16):
So that's the first thing.
And I think that is that, ohgosh, I'm afraid to throw food
away.
That's something that we carryinto adulthood, right?
I know.
I have that issue yeah, exactly.
I spent so much money on thisfood.
I spent so much time making it.
It's, it can be hard to throw itaway.
Yeah.
Or what we do as moms is we'lleat it ourselves, and then

(03:37):
that's not.
Healthy for us but yeah, no, Ican already tell as you go
through these, we're going tosee how these things play out in
adulthood.
So yeah.
Yeah, probably also something ifthis is something you grew up
with to remind yourself that youdon't have to lick the plate,
clean the plate maybe when yougo out to restaurants and such,
even if you've paid a lot forthe food.

(03:59):
Once you get to a satisfiedlevel, you don't have to keep
stepping yourself just becauseit's there.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
The second one is not, is don'tfocus on their weight.
So as we know, as adults talkingabout weight can be tricky and
it can make kids feel selfconscious or anxious about their

(04:19):
bodies.
So instead we want to focus onhealth and teach them about how
foods.
Different foods help theirbodies grow strong and healthy,
so they can develop a positivebody image and avoid, problems
down the road, like eatingdisorders and things like that.
And yeah just like you said,when we focus on our weight,

(04:40):
right?
And the number on the scale, itdoesn't tell the whole story.
So it's the same with our kids.
Yeah and if you have been inthis program, probably the most
important.
Coaching class from a mindsetthat perspective that we teach
is breaking up with the scaleand it boy, that is ingrained
really deeply.
And most women that we work withjust fixated on a number on the

(05:03):
scale.
What the number is can dictatewhether you are going to have a
good day, a bad day, whetheryou're a good person, a terrible
person.
So never maybe getting togetherwith the scale for kids as
they're younger.
Really good idea.
And I do think that this is abit generational.
I don't ever remember weighingmyself growing up, or my mom

(05:26):
having a scale.
I think we did from time totime.
But I think for some women, itmust have just been like the
thing.
And I've noticed for a littlebit older women, it's an even
bigger deal, like that numberand what that number means.
And just not even really beingable to understand that there
are things, it's not all aboutthe number on the scale.

(05:47):
You can be a number and it canmean you.
Are very healthy or you can beat the same number and it can
mean that you're not so healthy.
It doesn't tell you reallyanything about body composition.
So I think yeah, just not evenplanting that seed to ever begin
with.
This is really smart with ourkids.
It's hard sometimes even whenyou go to the pediatrician
because the pediatrician sayssomething about the number and

(06:08):
then you're like, what are youdoing?
And then it gets in their headfrom there from them.
But yeah, for sure.
And like I said, maybe it'schanging a bit.
My, my daughter might be alittle bit of an outlier, but
she knows how much she weighsand she's proud of her muscular
body so hopefully we can keep.
Planting those seeds, especiallyin our girls, I think for boys,

(06:30):
it might be different, but Iknow that they have, they can
have body image issues as well.
Yeah.
All right.
So the 3rd don't is don't usefood as a reward or a
punishment.
When we link good behavior orbad behavior to certain foods or
withholding certain foods, wecreate emotional associations
with foods that can lead toemotional eating.

(06:51):
Okay.
So we want to separate food frombehavior management as much as
possible so that kids learn toenjoy food for what it is and
not as a tool for getting whatthey want or avoiding getting
into trouble.
What do you think about that 1?
Yeah, I think that's reallyhard.
Yeah, hard to me, maybe becauseit was used for with me, or

(07:14):
maybe that's because, it'salways oh, let's go get a treat
or.
Oh, it's been a long day.
Let's get some ice cream.
But again, I think how thattranslates when we're adults is
I've had such a hard day.
It's been so hard or I've workedso hard.
The real conundrum is I've beenworking so hard at my health and
nutrition habits.
I deserve a hot fudge sundae.

(07:35):
And then sometimes you go and doeverything you've just been
working on.
Not that you can't ever have ahot fudge sundae, but it just
becomes this really weird cycle.
But but I do think it's hard.
It is hard, but I can rememberthis one.
I was pretty good about with mykids.
I remember, with Goodie bagsfor, after a birthday party or

(07:56):
something and putting in othersomething other than candy or,
anything where there was like acelebration, like, how can you
celebrate doesn't mean that youcan't have any food, but like,
how can you make it less aboutthe food than about the
celebration?
What you're, What you are notrewarding, but what you're

(08:17):
celebrating, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And at the same time, we don'tever want to like, say, you've
been bad.
So you don't deserve food.
Exactly.
That gets translated intoadulthood to in some pretty
weird ways.
Yeah, probably best to divorce.
food and behavior.
The next one is don't labelfoods as good or bad.

(08:39):
And I am totally guilty of thisone into my adulthood.
What I've realized is callingfoods good or bad makes us feel
guilty about eating certainthings.
Instead we want to teach aboutwhat you've taught me, Joe, like
the balance, that balance andmoderation is okay.
And that all foods can be partof a healthy diet when eaten in
the right amounts.

(09:00):
And yeah, I want to pass that onto my kids and help them enjoy
like a whole variety of foodswithout them feeling bad about
any of it.
Yeah.
I have a pretty strong opinionabout this because I think what
this, Like good, bad, clean,unclean.
I don't know what the opposite,dirty is opposite of clean, but
the clean food movement orwhatever, and you see it

(09:22):
everywhere.
Never eat this.
If you want to get banished yourbelly fat, never eat an apple
again.
It could just get super crazy.
But what I feel like it has doneis no one really knows what good
nutrition is.
No one understands.
Okay.
How much protein should I beeating?
What makes a food good or bad orhealthy or unhealthy?

(09:43):
We don't.
Even understand what that lookslike.
We just have this list of thingsthat are on limits, off limits
for, and it changes year byyear.
I know like seed oils have beendemonized.
I don't really know that muchabout seed oils, but very
qualified, reputablenutritionists.
I follow her like the seed oilsare not evil.

(10:04):
Like sugar is not evil.
If you ate five pounds of sugarevery day, yes, that's not good,
but really what we need tostrive for is like a healthy
balance.
Of foods that fuel our body.
And and you can do that withouthaving foods that are on the
good list and the naughty list.
And really what it forces you todo is learn about the
nutritional value of all foodsand how they fit in your diet.

(10:26):
Yeah, I think also as you'retalking, I'm thinking about like
certain foods that feel good inour bodies versus don't feel
good.
So for me, peppers and onions,they're healthy, but I, but they
don't agree with my stomach, soI avoid them, but it's not that
they're not bad.
They're just, they don't agreewith me or, they don't.
And my sister has all kinds offood sensitivities and things

(10:48):
like that.
So what like feels good in yourbody too, is important to pay
attention to.
Yeah.
Okay.
What's next?
Okay.
The 5th don't is don't skipfamily meals.
Eating together as a family hasso many benefits.
Kids are more likely to eathealthy foods when they see
their parents doing it.
So it's an opportunity for youto model healthy eating when

(11:08):
you're eating together.
And.
It's it's just a great way tobond as a family.
I love having meals togetherwith my kids.
We do not have the distractionof a TV or phones at the table.
We just have conversation andit's a great time.
There's lots of research tosupport that eating together as
a family is really good forkids.

(11:29):
Yeah, it sounds like you'reprobably a little better at this
than I am.
So I just feel like my kids arescattered.
They don't want to get harder asthey get older, for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But but I do think it'simportant.
I think for you parents withyounger kiddos, like really
instill that as a, Sacred time aspecial time.

(11:49):
However, you can do that becauseyou will miss it as they get
older.
And and yeah, I think it'sreally important and it is
really a sacred time to just betogether and share what's going
on.
But it does get challenging.
As they get older, my tip onthis would be, have your kids
help make the family dinner.
That is, you're getting ahead.

(12:10):
I'm, that's one of my.
We'll talk about that then, butyes any way that they can
contribute, I think is going tomake that time even more
special.
Okay.
We'll start with that one asthe, so these are the five dues.
We'll start with involve yourkids in meal preparation.
Joe and I've had talks aboutthis before.
Cause Joe, you love to cook yourkids, cook my daughter, my older

(12:33):
daughter, especially loves tocook.
So when they help with theshopping and the meal planning
and the cooking, they getexcited about.
Food and are more willing to trynew things.
It gives them a sense ofownership, makes mealtime more
fun.
They also learn such importantskills and gain a better
understanding of what goes intotheir meals.

(12:54):
And it's just, if you can, startwith baking Cookies, I guess if
that's like something that yourkid really enjoys or something,
but but slowly invite them tojust start helping you chop
vegetables, or even set theplace settings on the table.
Anything where they're involvedin helping out would be amazing.
Yeah, I'm going to probably saythis is my biggest do is teach

(13:17):
your kids how to cook, teachyour kids how to grocery shop.
That has been the biggest eyeopener for me and owning this
business is the number of adultswho are literally clueless about
how to nourish their bodies likeat all.
What do you mean make dinner?
I, I don't cook dinner.

(13:37):
I grab a frozen this, or I swingby, I, we don't keep food in our
house.
Or I don't, there is no plan tohave, there's just.
Catch up, catch can, or we don'tgo grocery shopping on a regular
basis.
So nourishing our bodies is likea very basic fundamental need of
every human.

(13:58):
I actually don't hear frompeople who know how to cook and
have that skill, so maybe don'tlove it, but they, I don't hear
those people saying, oh, I hatecooking.
I never want to be in thekitchen.
Just, it's usually a fear and alack of skill and just comfort
in the kitchen.
You don't have to be like agourmet chef or anything, but

(14:18):
just basic skills are reallyhelpful.
And just knowing how to get foodin your body that isn't from a
restaurant or a frozen meal alsoyou grew up on a farm, and I
think that's another thing thatmy kids.
Have really been into is likegrowing their own food, and
that's such a cool experimentwhen they're young and they see

(14:39):
that, they see it grow and thenthey can taste it.
And it's just it's anotherreally cool thing to do with
kids is just have them growtheir own herbs or their own
vegetables.
Yeah, when I was, I think itmust have been, it was probably
between my 8th and 9th gradeyears of.
High school.
I couldn't drive anywhere yet.
I really wanted a summer job.

(15:00):
So my mom said you can be likethe family chef and, do all the
grocery shopping.
So I had to do all the mealplanning and grocery shopping.
Looking back, that probably wasthe best, most helpful job I've
ever had because I learned howto plan and shop and cook meals
for, My family, anyone that washelping my parents on the farm,

(15:22):
we would usually make lunch ordinner.
Just really valuable to teachyour children those skills and
just be comfortable in thekitchen and comfortable going to
a grocery store.
Understanding what protein isunderstanding what carbs are
those sorts of things.
Okay.
Number 2 do is to set a goodexample.

(15:42):
So kids learn from watching us.
So we want to just set anexample of, show them how much
we live in, eating fruits andvegetables and.
Protein and all the thingsbecause often they'll follow
your lead.
And not always, not right away,but I find that, eventually like
we, we tend to have similareating similar eating habits and

(16:05):
patterns to those that werearound the most.
And you're the one in charge ofbuying the food mostly and,
providing the food.
So again, just make sure thatyou're providing them with.
The healthiest options.
Yeah, I think my thoughts onthis are again for you parents
with younger kiddos really startshowing what like, healthy meals

(16:27):
look like my teenagers.
I think that they would live onChipotle if they could that food
is just going to be more andmore enticing to them as they
get older.
And teaching them with yourfamily dinners and such, like,
how to construct a healthy meal.
How much protein having ahealthy protein carb and fat at
meals showing them what healthy.

(16:50):
No construction looks like is isreally important.
For them to see that they,they're going to mimic you in
most cases, or eat the food thatyou have in your house.
If you can set an example,that's going to be really
helpful to them when they go offon their own.
I think.
Yeah, I think I told you, Joe,that my kids have already said
to me like, wow, we didn'trealize how healthy we eat here

(17:12):
when, until we've gone to otherfriends houses and seen how they
eat.
And I overheard my daughter theother day talking about how she
enjoys salad and she enjoys,eating fruits and vegetables.
So that's just, it's awesome.
The third do is to educate themabout nutrition, which is what
we're talking about.
So it's pretty self explanatory,but teaching them about the

(17:36):
benefits of certain foods willhelp them make better choices.
Yeah.
And my point on this, of course,is going to be protein, helping
them learn how to eat protein,get enough protein.
And that is in terms of, I thinkthat's like the number one thing
everyone could learn is justwhat eating enough protein looks
like.
I think that probably is the onekey to weight management as we

(17:58):
grow older, that if you can nailthat and start nailing that when
you're younger, it's going tosave off so many other problems.
My son is good about eatingprotein.
My daughter, she knows that sheshould need it.
Getting a hundred grams ofprotein in your kids a day is,
that's not easy.
But anything I think you can doto help push that or help them
understand that it's going toserve them for their entire

(18:19):
life.
Awesome.
Okay.
Two more.
The one for the fourth one is todo create a positive mealtime
environment.
Because when mealtimes are calmand stress free, kids are more
relaxed and open to trying newthings, and we want them to have
positive associations witheating, so you want to try to

(18:42):
have a very relaxed and funmealtime.
And often I know from workingwith tons of moms that mealtime
is anything but stress free.
It's probably one of the moststressful times.
Yeah, so that's, if you canjust, relax your expectations,
relax your standards aroundcertain things.
And just believe that you canthey're getting nutrition.

(19:05):
They're getting enough food.
I think that's the most, thething that I hear the most from
moms is that they fear thattheir kids aren't eating enough,
but oftentimes they are gettingenough nutrition even if it's
the same.
Food day after day.
It's okay.
My pediatrician told me that'sokay.
Because they're still getting,they're still getting food.
And their tastes change overtime.

(19:27):
Ours do too.
I remember when my.
Daughter didn't used to liketomatoes and now she does, or I
remember like I hated Brusselssprouts.
I didn't even like the smell ofthem, but now I love them.
Their tastes, their preferenceswill change over time.
And so we can just relax alittle bit about it and not feel
like we have to get them to likeeverything right now.

(19:48):
Yeah, and I think, sometimesduring the week when things are
busy, you're just trying to getdinner on the table.
At least that's my life.
It's like, bringing stuff here.
But maybe if you can make 1special meal time a week, I
usually try to make Sundaynights like, fancy or special or
hey, let's just go to TraderJoe's and see what we can come
up with and that would be fun tocook or let's make pizza or put

(20:11):
out the fancy glasses or getfun, sparkling water, just
something to make it fun and nota burden.
But if you can just take a stepback.
And have, one meal a week.
That's start there.
That's fun..
Another thing to make thingsjust simpler and less stressful
is to have like themed nights,right?
So we used to have meatballMondays, taco Tuesdays, pizza

(20:34):
night, like breakfast for dinnernight, whatever.
What is coming?
They're excited about what'scoming.
And it just makes it, it justmakes it less stressful.
You don't have to really think,make decisions every night about
what it is you're going to have.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And also like planning, justhaving some meals on hand that
you can put together is going tomake it less stressful for you

(20:56):
and the final do and this is oneof the things that I work with
moms most on is to be patient.
So getting kids to change theireating habits or to try new
foods can take time.
And we've probably all heardlike they need sometimes to try
something several times beforethey actually start to enjoy it.

(21:17):
So by being patient, you givethem the chance to get used to
new things with, on their ownterms, without them feeling.
Pressured or pushed into it.
And it just goes into beingpatient goes into the one about
having a stress freeenvironment.
It all relates because, ifyou're like, getting upset with

(21:38):
your kid for not eatingsomething or not liking
something, then they have a badassociation with meal times.
You're upset, they're upset andit's just not a good situation.
So be patient.
And know that everything's goingto be okay.
These are great tips.
Yeah, patients, that's like thegolden rule, right?
With all things with your ownhealth and nutrition goals, you

(22:03):
learning to eat a new way fortraining, adopt healthier
habits, that sort of thing.
Sometimes things take time.
And it never works when we justput a bunch of pressure on
ourselves or the people aroundus to conform or change in the
way that we want.
So that's just a good lifelesson.
I think that we all probablyhave to take or, take to heart.

(22:25):
Okay.
So that's what we have for youtoday on the boost, your
metabolism after age 30 podcast.
Hopefully you got some good tipsand some good do's and don'ts
from Pam.
And we will catch you next time.
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