August 6, 2025 • 21 mins
Summary
In this episode of Breast Cancer Reimagined, host Shannon D. Silva discusses the pervasive emotion of fear that accompanies a breast cancer diagnosis. She emphasizes the importance of acknowledging fear rather than pushing it away, and offers strategies for coping with it. Drawing from her personal experiences and insights from Dr. Susan Jeffers' book, Shannon explores the roots of fear, the significance of self-trust, and practical strategies to build resilience. The episode concludes with actionable steps for listeners to create their own 'I can handle it' toolkit, fostering a sense of empowerment and support throughout their journey.
Takeaways
- Fear is a normal part of the breast cancer journey.
- You can learn to handle fear.
- Building self-trust is key.
- Confusing discomfort with inability can hinder progress.
- You have a powerful inner toolkit of strengths.
- Reflecting on past challenges helps build confidence.
- Self-trust comes from showing up despite difficulties.
- It's okay to feel fear; it doesn't mean you're weak.
- Creating a support system is essential.
- Daily practices can reinforce your resilience.
🌟 Strategy #1: Build Your “I Handled It” File
A powerful reminder: You’ve done hard things before—and you can do them again.
Step 1: Recall a tough moment you’ve overcome.
Step 2: Write it down. Capture what happened, how you felt, and what helped you cope. Be honest and specific.
Step 3: Identify the character strengths you used.
Step 4: Revisit your file when fear or doubt shows up. Let it remind you: You’ve handled challenges before. You can trust yourself to do it again.
✨ Strategy #2: “Today, I Handled…”
Build self-trust in real time—one day at a time.
Step 1: Make this a daily practice.
At the end of each day, complete the sentence:
 📝 “Today, I handled…”
Step 2: Keep it simple. No win is too small.Â
Step 3: Reflect regularly. Trust builds quietly through consistency.
💪 Strategy #3: Create Your “I Can Handle It” Toolkit
Your personal collection of tools to help you stay grounded and strong in hard moments.
Step 1: Gather your go-to resources:
- Square Breathing
- Mindful Pause
- Affirmations
- Your Character Strengths profile
- Support call list
- Photos, quotes, or memories that remind you of your courage
Step 2: Practice using your tools. The more you use them, the more natural it becomes to reach for support when you need it most.
Feel the Fear… and Do It Anyway
List of 24 Character Strengths
Please let us know how we can support you by completing the Breast Cancer Reimagined - Listener Survey
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
The story you tell yourself about your breast
cancer journey shapes yourentire experience, whether
you've been recently diagnosedor are in the midst of treatment
.
Breast Cancer Reimagined isyour podcast for writing this
new chapter of your life.
Hi, I'm Shannon, your host, andI'm so glad you're here.
(00:25):
As a proud two-time breastcancer survivor, I'm on a
mission to help women like youreimagine how you navigate your
breast cancer journey by helpingyou shift your mindset,
activate your strengths anduncover deeper meaning in your
journey.
I'm creating future episodes toaddress your unique challenges,
(00:45):
but I need your input.
What are your biggest questionsor struggles when it comes to
your journey?
Share them with me bycompleting the Google form
that's linked in the show notes.
Your voice matters and togetherwe can create something truly
powerful.
I can't wait to hear from you.
Hello, hello, welcome, orwelcome back to Breast Cancer
(01:15):
Reimagined.
Hi, I'm Shannon, your host.
I'm a proud two-time breastcancer survivor and I am so glad
you are here Today.
We're talking about one of themost common yet most difficult
emotions we experience on thisjourney Fear, that feeling of
(01:37):
your stomach dropping the racingthoughts that keep you up at
night.
That's the fear we're talkingabout today.
Fear can show up anywhere, atappointments, in the waiting, in
the unknown, and that's okay.
Fear is a part of our breastcancer journey, but today we're
(02:02):
not here to ignore it or push itaway.
But today we're not here toignore it or push it away.
We're here to meet it withstrength, with clarity and with
a renewed sense of control.
Welcome to Episode 12, how toHandle Fear when Diagnosed with
(02:23):
Breast Cancer.
Diagnosed with breast cancer.
Inspiration for this episodecame from the book Feel the Fear
and Do it Anyway, by Dr SusanJeffers.
She writes at the bottom ofevery one of our fears is simply
the fear that we can't handlewhatever life may bring us.
(02:43):
That we can't handle whateverlife may bring us.
Fear first showed up for meafter my mammogram in September
2017.
I got a letter in the mail.
It said your breast tissue isvery dense.
We recommend that you schedulea biopsy.
We recommend that you schedulea biopsy.
(03:07):
I remember feeling encouragedwhen I read 80% of the results
come back benign.
So I focused on the 80%.
I tried to stay positive, butthen one day the phone rang
while I was at work and I heardthe words no one ever wants to
hear you have breast cancer,invasive ductal carcinoma of the
(03:29):
right breast.
My mind spiraled and fearrushed in like a tidal wave.
What if the cancer spreadseverywhere?
What if they don't get it outin time?
What if I die?
All I wanted in that moment wasfor it to be gone fast, to
(03:56):
somehow reverse time, to wake upand find out it had all been a
mistake, it had all been amistake.
That moment, maybe you've hadone like it A diagnosis, a
callback, a scan, a treatmentplan.
(04:19):
You get news that flips yourworld upside down and suddenly
the ground beneath you doesn'tfeel solid anymore.
Take a moment to think back toyour own diagnosis.
What did fear sound like foryou?
At the heart of it, it isn'tjust the fear about the
treatment, the test results oreven the unknown future.
(04:41):
It's the belief beneath all ofit, the voice that whispers.
I can't handle this.
But why do we assume we can'thandle it?
Let me share with you threecommon reasons, and as I read
each one, think about the reasonthat resonates most with you.
(05:03):
The first reason we assume thatwe can't handle a breast cancer
diagnosis and treatment isbecause we confuse discomfort
with inability.
So when something feels hard orpainful, it's easy to assume
we're not equipped to deal withit.
(05:24):
But feeling uncomfortable isn'tthe same as being incapable.
It just means it's challenging,not impossible.
The second reason is becausewe're stepping into unfamiliar
territory and in that space,doubt creeps in.
(05:45):
But the truth is you have apowerful inner toolkit, your 24
character strengths.
You may not have faced thisexact challenge, but bravery,
hope, perseverance and love havealways lived inside of you.
This moment isn't aboutbecoming someone new.
(06:07):
It's about discovering thestrength that's been there all
along.
You can handle this.
And the third reason we forgethow far we've already come Fear
makes us forget the strengthwe've already shown in past
challenges.
That's why it really helps usto pause and reflect, because
(06:31):
you've gotten through toughtimes before and that's proof
you can do it again.
So which of the three reasonsresonates most with you?
Confusing discomfort withinability, or stepping into
unfamiliar territory, orforgetting how far you've come?
(06:53):
For me, it's about confusingdiscomfort with inability.
When something feels hard, myfirst instinct is to think maybe
I'm just not good at this.
But the truth is, maybe I'mjust not good at this, but the
truth is, growth often feelsuncomfortable.
So when that quiet voice askscan I really handle this?
(07:16):
Yes, you can.
Not all at once and notperfectly, but moment by moment
you can.
You don't need all the answersright now.
You just need to remindyourself I can handle the next
(07:43):
step, and then the one afterthat.
And the foundation of thatbelief, that ability to handle
the next step and the one afterthat, it all comes down to
unlocking one key skill tohandle fear during your breast
cancer journey.
That skill is building trust inyourself.
Building trust in yourselfisn't about pretending
(08:07):
everything is easy.
Real self-trust comes fromshowing up despite the
difficulty and being honestabout the struggle and proving
to yourself again and again thatyou are brave and you can
persevere and move forward evenwhen things feel hard, messy or
(08:30):
uncertain.
Building trust in yourselfdoesn't mean being fearless.
Self-trust is about knowing youcan still take action even when
you're scared, by using yourbravery and zest for life.
Using your bravery and zest forlife.
(08:52):
And lastly, building trust inyourself doesn't mean wearing a
brave face 24-7.
Forget the fake smiles andforced positivity.
It's about being real withyourself and trusting your inner
strength to keep moving forward.
It's knowing it's okay to havedoubts or feel down and that it
(09:14):
doesn't make you weak.
It shows honesty.
You trust yourself, to feelyour feelings and get through
them.
So if trusting yourself isn'tabout being fearless, faking
positivity or pretending thingsare easy, what is it about?
Well, it's about tuning intothat voice inside of you that
(09:39):
believes in you, especially whenthings go hard.
That voice is your inner coach.
Think of your inner coach asthat supportive and encouraging
voice inside of you.
It's that part of you thatbelieves in your ability to
handle challenges, even whenyou're unsure.
(10:01):
Can you recognize that voicewithin you, the one that reminds
you you've made it throughevery hard day so far?
That voice might be quiet rightnow, but you can help it grow
louder.
So how do we actually buildthis crucial self-trust?
(10:24):
Here are three strategies youcan use to build that inner
trust muscle, starting today.
Our first strategy is designedto combat that feeling of
forgetfulness that fear brings.
It's called the I handled itfile.
(10:47):
Step number one think back to atough time, one you got through
.
Step number two write it downand capture how you felt and
also identify what helped youcope.
Step number three spot thecharacter strengths that you
(11:09):
used.
There is a list of the 24character strengths in the show
notes.
And then step number four is torevisit this list when fear
shows up.
Let it remind you that you arecapable of facing your fears.
Let me give you a quick example.
(11:31):
So again, step number one,think back to a tough time, one
that you got through.
So the tough time I'm going toshare is a time when my husband
and I went on a whitewaterrafting trip for the first time
and about maybe the first fourminutes into this trip, we hit
our boat, hit a huge rock andthe boat flipped over and
(11:54):
everyone got thrown from theboat and I landed underneath the
boat.
And the next step is to capturehow you felt and what helped
you cope.
Well, I tell you, when Irealized that I was underneath
the boat, it was really dark andI remembered okay, I'm under
the boat, I need to get to thesurface what I said to myself.
I said don't panic, just get tothe surface.
(12:18):
Because I knew if I panicked inthat moment, when I was under
the water, under the boat, Icould have drowned if I was
panicking.
So I told myself don't panic,get to the surface.
And actually in the show notesthere's a picture of the moment
I reached the surface and youcan see the fear on my face.
Once I was at the surface, myfocus get to the other boat.
(12:42):
I made my way to the boat.
They pulled me in and I satthere and the next thought in my
head was I don't wanna do thisanymore.
Like I'm done, like I wanna gohome, like I want to go home.
But I had to tell myself I saidokay, shannon, there's nowhere
to go, you have to ride it out.
You have to continue on thisriver in order to be able to go
(13:04):
back home.
And so in that moment I said,okay, just breathe, just just
breathe.
So I spent some time breathingand luckily that helped me to
calm down.
Step number three is to identifythe character strengths that
you used.
In my example, I used myself-regulation, and that means
I was able to manage my emotionsin that moment when I was
(13:27):
afraid and I didn't panic.
I was also able to use mybravery.
I think just going, just sayingyes to whitewater rafting, I
felt really brave.
And then I also use myperseverance to get from
underneath the boat to get tothe surface and get to the other
boat, to safety.
(13:48):
And so I have a whole bunch ofpictures from this experience,
and so I often will look atthose photos as a reminder of
something that I have handled.
That was really scary for me.
Now let's move from reflectingon the past to actively building
(14:08):
self-trust in the present withour second strategy, and this
one is called Today I Handled.
Think of this as your real-timeresilience diary, a daily
practice to help you notice yourstrength as it's happening.
Here's how it works.
At the end of each day, finishthis simple sentence Today I
(14:33):
handled.
It could be something big, likeshowing up for a tough
appointment, or something smalllike getting out of bed when you
didn't feel like it.
No win is too small.
All Every time you name whatyou handled, you're building a
(14:58):
track record of strength, oneday at a time.
So we're building ourself-trust muscle, and our next
strategy is all about giving youtangible ways to support
yourself in the moment.
So imagine having apersonalized collection of
resources right at yourfingertips that you know will
bring you comfort, courage andcalm.
(15:20):
That's the power of our thirdstrategy creating your I Can
Handle it toolkit.
Step number one gather yourtools, and these can be a
variety of things.
I'll share with you what I havein my toolkit to give you some
ideas.
I have breathing exercises.
(15:42):
One of them is called squarebreathing, and I'll include a
link in the show notes.
When we are afraid, our breathoften becomes shallow and quick,
and square breathing slowseverything down, with the steady
rhythm which signals to ourbody I am safe.
(16:03):
Something else I have in mytoolkit is a mindfulness
practice, and this practice iscalled the mindful pause.
Now, this is a practice toallow you to slow down, take an
inventory of your emotions andreconnect with your strengths.
(16:25):
There's also a link to themindful pause in the show notes.
There's also a link to themindful pause in the show notes.
Something else in my toolkitthat you can include in yours is
your personalized characterstrengths profile.
There's a link to the viasurvey in the show notes so that
you can download yourpersonalized character strengths
(16:46):
profile.
Think of this profile like amirror reflecting back the best
parts of you.
Something else to include inyour toolkit affirmations.
I'm going to share with yousome of the affirmations that
I'm currently working with.
Here's the first affirmationit's okay for this to feel hard.
(17:09):
Number two I can let it be hardwithout making it mean
something about me.
Number three fear is a part ofthe process, not a sign to stop
(17:33):
Something else in the toolkitPhotos Create albums on your
phone that remind you of timesthat you have faced your fears,
or times that you were afraidand how you rose above your fear
.
In episode number 10, I shared astory of the time I fell off my
(17:54):
electric skateboard and I gotroad rash.
Well, I have that picture in myalbum because when I look at
that and I remind myself of wow,I fell, but I still got up and
I kept going.
So that's a photo that I oftenrefer back to.
I mentioned the whitewaterrafting trip earlier.
I have a lot of those photosalso in my toolkit.
(18:17):
Another photo the day I had amastectomy in November of 2000,
no, sorry, december of 2021, Irode my one wheel to the
entrance of the hospital beforeI went in for my surgery.
I'll also include a link to thatvideo in the show notes as well
.
So make sure you have somephotos, videos, anything that
(18:41):
just helps to remind you thatyou can handle it, that you have
faced fear in the past and thatyou can do it again.
And lastly, something you mightwant to include in your toolkit
is a support call list.
Who are the people you have onspeed dial that you can talk to
when you're feeling afraid, whenyou feel that you just need
(19:04):
someone to tell you that thingsare going to be okay.
Who is on that list?
So make sure you have a list ofpeople that you can contact
when you need that support.
Okay, so we've gone through stepone, which is gather your tools
.
If there are other tools thatyou want to include in your
toolkit, please do.
(19:24):
Step number two is to try outthe things you have in your
toolkit, see what feels right,and the key is to practice
regularly.
So when fear arrives, you'reready.
As we wrap up today's episode, Iwant to leave you with three
(19:45):
key takeaways.
Fear is a normal part of thebreast cancer journey.
Two, you can learn to handlefear.
And three, building self-trustis key.
And remember, you don't have tobe fearless, you just have to
(20:07):
keep choosing to show up.
One breath, one step, onemoment at a time.
Now it's your turn.
Which of these strategies willyou explore this week?
Maybe you'll create your Ihandled it file.
(20:27):
Again, that's a collection ofmoments where you made it
through something tough big orsmall, it all counts.
Or maybe you'll respond to theprompt today I handled it.
A daily practice that remindsyou of your strength in real
time.
A daily practice that remindsyou of your strength in real
time.
(20:48):
And number three, maybe youwant to develop your personal I
can handle it toolkit yourpersonalized go-to list of
resources, right at yourfingertips, that you know will
bring you comfort, courage andcalm.
If this episode resonated withyou, hit, follow and share it
(21:10):
with someone who might need tohear this today, and also join
our Breast Cancer Reimaginedcommunity for more support,
reflection prompts andinspiration.
The link is in the show notes.
The link is in the show notes.
Next time on Breast CancerReimagined, we're talking about
(21:31):
what to do when we get caught upin mental loops of negativity.
Don't miss episode 13.
Don't forget to subscribe.
I'll talk with you in the nextepisode.
Thank you for joining.
The story you tell yourself about your breast
cancer journey shapes yourentire experience, whether
you've been recently diagnosedor are in the midst of treatment
.
Breast Cancer Reimagined isyour podcast for writing this
new chapter of your life.
Hi, I'm Shannon, your host, andI'm so glad you're here.
(00:25):
As a proud two-time breastcancer survivor, I'm on a
mission to help women like youreimagine how you navigate your
breast cancer journey by helpingyou shift your mindset,
activate your strengths anduncover deeper meaning in your
journey.
I'm creating future episodes toaddress your unique challenges,
(00:45):
but I need your input.
What are your biggest questionsor struggles when it comes to
your journey?
Share them with me bycompleting the Google form
that's linked in the show notes.
Your voice matters and togetherwe can create something truly
powerful.
I can't wait to hear from you.
Hello, hello, welcome, orwelcome back to Breast Cancer
(01:15):
Reimagined.
Hi, I'm Shannon, your host.
I'm a proud two-time breastcancer survivor and I am so glad
you are here Today.
We're talking about one of themost common yet most difficult
emotions we experience on thisjourney Fear, that feeling of
(01:37):
your stomach dropping the racingthoughts that keep you up at
night.
That's the fear we're talkingabout today.
Fear can show up anywhere, atappointments, in the waiting, in
the unknown, and that's okay.
Fear is a part of our breastcancer journey, but today we're
(02:02):
not here to ignore it or push itaway.
But today we're not here toignore it or push it away.
We're here to meet it withstrength, with clarity and with
a renewed sense of control.
Welcome to Episode 12, how toHandle Fear when Diagnosed with
(02:23):
Breast Cancer.
Diagnosed with breast cancer.
Inspiration for this episodecame from the book Feel the Fear
and Do it Anyway, by Dr SusanJeffers.
She writes at the bottom ofevery one of our fears is simply
the fear that we can't handlewhatever life may bring us.
(02:43):
That we can't handle whateverlife may bring us.
Fear first showed up for meafter my mammogram in September
2017.
I got a letter in the mail.
It said your breast tissue isvery dense.
We recommend that you schedulea biopsy.
We recommend that you schedulea biopsy.
(03:07):
I remember feeling encouragedwhen I read 80% of the results
come back benign.
So I focused on the 80%.
I tried to stay positive, butthen one day the phone rang
while I was at work and I heardthe words no one ever wants to
hear you have breast cancer,invasive ductal carcinoma of the
(03:29):
right breast.
My mind spiraled and fearrushed in like a tidal wave.
What if the cancer spreadseverywhere?
What if they don't get it outin time?
What if I die?
All I wanted in that moment wasfor it to be gone fast, to
(03:56):
somehow reverse time, to wake upand find out it had all been a
mistake, it had all been amistake.
That moment, maybe you've hadone like it A diagnosis, a
callback, a scan, a treatmentplan.
(04:19):
You get news that flips yourworld upside down and suddenly
the ground beneath you doesn'tfeel solid anymore.
Take a moment to think back toyour own diagnosis.
What did fear sound like foryou?
At the heart of it, it isn'tjust the fear about the
treatment, the test results oreven the unknown future.
(04:41):
It's the belief beneath all ofit, the voice that whispers.
I can't handle this.
But why do we assume we can'thandle it?
Let me share with you threecommon reasons, and as I read
each one, think about the reasonthat resonates most with you.
(05:03):
The first reason we assume thatwe can't handle a breast cancer
diagnosis and treatment isbecause we confuse discomfort
with inability.
So when something feels hard orpainful, it's easy to assume
we're not equipped to deal withit.
(05:24):
But feeling uncomfortable isn'tthe same as being incapable.
It just means it's challenging,not impossible.
The second reason is becausewe're stepping into unfamiliar
territory and in that space,doubt creeps in.
(05:45):
But the truth is you have apowerful inner toolkit, your 24
character strengths.
You may not have faced thisexact challenge, but bravery,
hope, perseverance and love havealways lived inside of you.
This moment isn't aboutbecoming someone new.
(06:07):
It's about discovering thestrength that's been there all
along.
You can handle this.
And the third reason we forgethow far we've already come Fear
makes us forget the strengthwe've already shown in past
challenges.
That's why it really helps usto pause and reflect, because
(06:31):
you've gotten through toughtimes before and that's proof
you can do it again.
So which of the three reasonsresonates most with you?
Confusing discomfort withinability, or stepping into
unfamiliar territory, orforgetting how far you've come?
(06:53):
For me, it's about confusingdiscomfort with inability.
When something feels hard, myfirst instinct is to think maybe
I'm just not good at this.
But the truth is, maybe I'mjust not good at this, but the
truth is, growth often feelsuncomfortable.
So when that quiet voice askscan I really handle this?
(07:16):
Yes, you can.
Not all at once and notperfectly, but moment by moment
you can.
You don't need all the answersright now.
You just need to remindyourself I can handle the next
(07:43):
step, and then the one afterthat.
And the foundation of thatbelief, that ability to handle
the next step and the one afterthat, it all comes down to
unlocking one key skill tohandle fear during your breast
cancer journey.
That skill is building trust inyourself.
Building trust in yourselfisn't about pretending
(08:07):
everything is easy.
Real self-trust comes fromshowing up despite the
difficulty and being honestabout the struggle and proving
to yourself again and again thatyou are brave and you can
persevere and move forward evenwhen things feel hard, messy or
(08:30):
uncertain.
Building trust in yourselfdoesn't mean being fearless.
Self-trust is about knowing youcan still take action even when
you're scared, by using yourbravery and zest for life.
Using your bravery and zest forlife.
(08:52):
And lastly, building trust inyourself doesn't mean wearing a
brave face 24-7.
Forget the fake smiles andforced positivity.
It's about being real withyourself and trusting your inner
strength to keep moving forward.
It's knowing it's okay to havedoubts or feel down and that it
(09:14):
doesn't make you weak.
It shows honesty.
You trust yourself, to feelyour feelings and get through
them.
So if trusting yourself isn'tabout being fearless, faking
positivity or pretending thingsare easy, what is it about?
Well, it's about tuning intothat voice inside of you that
(09:39):
believes in you, especially whenthings go hard.
That voice is your inner coach.
Think of your inner coach asthat supportive and encouraging
voice inside of you.
It's that part of you thatbelieves in your ability to
handle challenges, even whenyou're unsure.
(10:01):
Can you recognize that voicewithin you, the one that reminds
you you've made it throughevery hard day so far?
That voice might be quiet rightnow, but you can help it grow
louder.
So how do we actually buildthis crucial self-trust?
(10:24):
Here are three strategies youcan use to build that inner
trust muscle, starting today.
Our first strategy is designedto combat that feeling of
forgetfulness that fear brings.
It's called the I handled itfile.
(10:47):
Step number one think back to atough time, one you got through
.
Step number two write it downand capture how you felt and
also identify what helped youcope.
Step number three spot thecharacter strengths that you
(11:09):
used.
There is a list of the 24character strengths in the show
notes.
And then step number four is torevisit this list when fear
shows up.
Let it remind you that you arecapable of facing your fears.
Let me give you a quick example.
(11:31):
So again, step number one,think back to a tough time, one
that you got through.
So the tough time I'm going toshare is a time when my husband
and I went on a whitewaterrafting trip for the first time
and about maybe the first fourminutes into this trip, we hit
our boat, hit a huge rock andthe boat flipped over and
(11:54):
everyone got thrown from theboat and I landed underneath the
boat.
And the next step is to capturehow you felt and what helped
you cope.
Well, I tell you, when Irealized that I was underneath
the boat, it was really dark andI remembered okay, I'm under
the boat, I need to get to thesurface what I said to myself.
I said don't panic, just get tothe surface.
(12:18):
Because I knew if I panicked inthat moment, when I was under
the water, under the boat, Icould have drowned if I was
panicking.
So I told myself don't panic,get to the surface.
And actually in the show notesthere's a picture of the moment
I reached the surface and youcan see the fear on my face.
Once I was at the surface, myfocus get to the other boat.
(12:42):
I made my way to the boat.
They pulled me in and I satthere and the next thought in my
head was I don't wanna do thisanymore.
Like I'm done, like I wanna gohome, like I want to go home.
But I had to tell myself I saidokay, shannon, there's nowhere
to go, you have to ride it out.
You have to continue on thisriver in order to be able to go
(13:04):
back home.
And so in that moment I said,okay, just breathe, just just
breathe.
So I spent some time breathingand luckily that helped me to
calm down.
Step number three is to identifythe character strengths that
you used.
In my example, I used myself-regulation, and that means
I was able to manage my emotionsin that moment when I was
(13:27):
afraid and I didn't panic.
I was also able to use mybravery.
I think just going, just sayingyes to whitewater rafting, I
felt really brave.
And then I also use myperseverance to get from
underneath the boat to get tothe surface and get to the other
boat, to safety.
(13:48):
And so I have a whole bunch ofpictures from this experience,
and so I often will look atthose photos as a reminder of
something that I have handled.
That was really scary for me.
Now let's move from reflectingon the past to actively building
(14:08):
self-trust in the present withour second strategy, and this
one is called Today I Handled.
Think of this as your real-timeresilience diary, a daily
practice to help you notice yourstrength as it's happening.
Here's how it works.
At the end of each day, finishthis simple sentence Today I
(14:33):
handled.
It could be something big, likeshowing up for a tough
appointment, or something smalllike getting out of bed when you
didn't feel like it.
No win is too small.
All Every time you name whatyou handled, you're building a
(14:58):
track record of strength, oneday at a time.
So we're building ourself-trust muscle, and our next
strategy is all about giving youtangible ways to support
yourself in the moment.
So imagine having apersonalized collection of
resources right at yourfingertips that you know will
bring you comfort, courage andcalm.
(15:20):
That's the power of our thirdstrategy creating your I Can
Handle it toolkit.
Step number one gather yourtools, and these can be a
variety of things.
I'll share with you what I havein my toolkit to give you some
ideas.
I have breathing exercises.
(15:42):
One of them is called squarebreathing, and I'll include a
link in the show notes.
When we are afraid, our breathoften becomes shallow and quick,
and square breathing slowseverything down, with the steady
rhythm which signals to ourbody I am safe.
(16:03):
Something else I have in mytoolkit is a mindfulness
practice, and this practice iscalled the mindful pause.
Now, this is a practice toallow you to slow down, take an
inventory of your emotions andreconnect with your strengths.
(16:25):
There's also a link to themindful pause in the show notes.
There's also a link to themindful pause in the show notes.
Something else in my toolkitthat you can include in yours is
your personalized characterstrengths profile.
There's a link to the viasurvey in the show notes so that
you can download yourpersonalized character strengths
(16:46):
profile.
Think of this profile like amirror reflecting back the best
parts of you.
Something else to include inyour toolkit affirmations.
I'm going to share with yousome of the affirmations that
I'm currently working with.
Here's the first affirmationit's okay for this to feel hard.
(17:09):
Number two I can let it be hardwithout making it mean
something about me.
Number three fear is a part ofthe process, not a sign to stop
(17:33):
Something else in the toolkitPhotos Create albums on your
phone that remind you of timesthat you have faced your fears,
or times that you were afraidand how you rose above your fear
.
In episode number 10, I shared astory of the time I fell off my
(17:54):
electric skateboard and I gotroad rash.
Well, I have that picture in myalbum because when I look at
that and I remind myself of wow,I fell, but I still got up and
I kept going.
So that's a photo that I oftenrefer back to.
I mentioned the whitewaterrafting trip earlier.
I have a lot of those photosalso in my toolkit.
(18:17):
Another photo the day I had amastectomy in November of 2000,
no, sorry, december of 2021, Irode my one wheel to the
entrance of the hospital beforeI went in for my surgery.
I'll also include a link to thatvideo in the show notes as well
.
So make sure you have somephotos, videos, anything that
(18:41):
just helps to remind you thatyou can handle it, that you have
faced fear in the past and thatyou can do it again.
And lastly, something you mightwant to include in your toolkit
is a support call list.
Who are the people you have onspeed dial that you can talk to
when you're feeling afraid, whenyou feel that you just need
(19:04):
someone to tell you that thingsare going to be okay.
Who is on that list?
So make sure you have a list ofpeople that you can contact
when you need that support.
Okay, so we've gone through stepone, which is gather your tools
.
If there are other tools thatyou want to include in your
toolkit, please do.
(19:24):
Step number two is to try outthe things you have in your
toolkit, see what feels right,and the key is to practice
regularly.
So when fear arrives, you'reready.
As we wrap up today's episode, Iwant to leave you with three
(19:45):
key takeaways.
Fear is a normal part of thebreast cancer journey.
Two, you can learn to handlefear.
And three, building self-trustis key.
And remember, you don't have tobe fearless, you just have to
(20:07):
keep choosing to show up.
One breath, one step, onemoment at a time.
Now it's your turn.
Which of these strategies willyou explore this week?
Maybe you'll create your Ihandled it file.
(20:27):
Again, that's a collection ofmoments where you made it
through something tough big orsmall, it all counts.
Or maybe you'll respond to theprompt today I handled it.
A daily practice that remindsyou of your strength in real
time.
A daily practice that remindsyou of your strength in real
time.
(20:48):
And number three, maybe youwant to develop your personal I
can handle it toolkit yourpersonalized go-to list of
resources, right at yourfingertips, that you know will
bring you comfort, courage andcalm.
If this episode resonated withyou, hit, follow and share it
(21:10):
with someone who might need tohear this today, and also join
our Breast Cancer Reimaginedcommunity for more support,
reflection prompts andinspiration.
The link is in the show notes.
The link is in the show notes.
Next time on Breast CancerReimagined, we're talking about
(21:31):
what to do when we get caught upin mental loops of negativity.
Don't miss episode 13.
Don't forget to subscribe.
I'll talk with you in the nextepisode.
Thank you for joining.
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