July 25, 2025 • 19 mins
This week on Bridgette Unfiltered, we’re brewing something hot.
The Tea App if you haven’t heard, is a viral new platform where women can anonymously review men they've dated, and let’s just say its making waves!
In this full Dear Bridgette episode, I respond to the flood of DMs asking what I really think about this app, and oh, I have thoughts.
We also dig into two psychology-backed facts that explain why public shaming platforms might be doing more harm than good.
I break down what men are really struggling with in dating, how emotional safety is being misunderstood, and offer a better, more healing alternative to finding closure without burning someone at the fu*king stake circa Salem Witch Hunts!
"Maybe instead of writing a 1-star review, just block him and start journaling. Closure doesn’t need a comment section."
Whether you’re dating, healing, or just here to get caught up to speed, this episode has something for you.
👉 Submit your questions for “Dear Bridgette” via Instagram @BridgetteUNFILTERED
🎧 Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you pod!
👉Subscribe to the weekly blog at www.bridgetteunfiltered.com!
🍿Enjoy the BridgetteUNFILTERED YouTube at www.youtube.com/bridgetteunfiltered
email the show: team@bunfilteredpod.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Is the T-app making dating worse?
Let's talk about it.
The T-app is the latest viralplatform allowing women to
review their exes and bad dates.
But is this helping or hurtingmodern dating culture?
Bridget Unfiltered is gonnabreak it all down.
(00:21):
Stay tuned.
Welcome back to BridgetUnfiltered, the podcast, where
me, your host, bridget B, comesin with some truths and some
perspectives and point of viewsto hopefully create a bigger and
wider conversation.
(00:43):
And today, oh boy, today, we'regoing to sip some piping hot
tea, but not the kind that'sgoing to help your nervous
system, you know.
Not some good chamomile tea,which I love, with a little bit
of ginger.
It's just delicious.
But no, no, no, we're talkingabout the new tea app.
(01:06):
Ladies and gentlemen, nowlisten.
Y'all know I love my girls, I'mpro calling out trash behavior
and I've had my fair share oflet's call them learning
experiences in the dating world,between the dating world men
(01:28):
coming across at the expos AVNstrip club, you name it.
But I've also been asked aboutthis so many times in my DMs
that I figured let's just do afull Dear Bridget episode.
So that's what you're gettingtoday.
Today's question is DearBridget, have you heard about
(01:50):
the T-Hap?
Do you think it's a good wayfor women to protect each other
from bad men in dating.
Ladies and gentlemen, buckle up.
The question that was asked isbasically just taking bits from
all the questions, I would sayat least 50, maybe 55, 60.
(02:13):
I wasn't counting, it was aboutunder 100, but just sorting
through this week and we had acompletely different episode set
up for you.
But we all looked at each otherand we're like we need to dive
into this one and let's just getinto it.
What is a T-app and, for fuck'ssake, why is it trending?
So if you haven't heard yet,the T-app is this new invite
(02:37):
only platform and launched in2024.
The premise women can leaveanonymous reviews about men
they've dated.
Basically a Yelp for men, butfor real life dating experiences
.
You search a guy's name and ifsomeone added him to the
database, you might find areview Think ghosted after three
(03:02):
months, or he's really nice butemotionally unavailable, or
girls.
He took me out to dinner andmade me pay half.
I know this one's gonna rufflesome feathers Made me pay for
half the dinner on our firstdate, or whatever it could be.
(03:26):
It was originally designed as asafety tool, especially for
online dating.
But let's be honest.
Let's be real.
It's going viral for the gossip, not the safeness of it, the
safetiness or the safety net ofit.
It's going viral for the gossip.
It's like I think there was anapp called Rate my Professor in
(03:50):
college.
So imagine the chaos that isensuing as we speak.
And if you're on social media,tiktok especially, you've seen
it, which is why we wanted tobring this to light this week
right away.
The app was co-founded by agroup of female entrepreneurs
who cited a quote need fortransparency in modern dating
(04:13):
culture.
They claim it helps women avoidnarcissists, liars or worse.
Now here's where your girlBridget gets unfiltered.
I totally understand the intentbehind the app I do.
(04:34):
I respect it but just becausesomething feels empowering just
doesn't mean it's going to beproductive in the long term.
Let me hit you with a couple offacts.
That, for me, raises someserious red flags.
(04:57):
Fact number one according toPEW research I want to say Pew,
but I might be completelymisspoken here In 2023, more
than 60% of single men under 35reported struggling with anxiety
around dating, with many citingfear of being judged online or
(05:21):
canceled as a top stressor.
Let that sink in.
We've definitely created aculture where people are already
afraid to date and now we'reasking them to potentially end
up on a public shame app.
To me oh, don't come for me,ladies, but to me this doesn't
(05:46):
protect women.
It just makes intimacy feellike a trap, and it's already
bad enough.
And fact number two in aPsychology Today study in 2022,
women rated emotional safety andauthentic connection as the top
two factors for long-termrelationships.
But here's the kicker guys.
(06:07):
Emotional safety is built inprivate, not with the threat of
public review looming over it.
You know what I mean.
Imagine how these older I sayolder as in celebrities from the
past, when the paparazzi wereall over them like guess who's
(06:27):
dating who and who.
We all know it was for PR stunt.
Now we do, but when we thoughtit was real, oh my gosh, you
couldn't.
We were shocked if anyone madeit past 10 days because there
was just so much scrutiny overit.
No-transcript Is getting it.
(06:52):
How do we expect men or anyoneto be vulnerable, honest or fuck
imperfect If they're worriedthat one awkward date could
potentially make them go viral?
It feels less like safety,ladies and gentlemen, and more
(07:15):
like surveillance One of thethings that I definitely stand
(07:36):
on and a hill survival to putfood on your table, but it also
created a social structure thatwe have yet to be able to kind
of break through.
I truly believe that societycreates its own demise, as it's
(08:01):
very much evident in historyDivision, lack of empathy, lack
of knowledge.
We create our own problems.
Covid came through and we allpretty much fuck if we know how
to have any social skillsanymore.
The ones who do are breakingthrough, and here we are with
(08:25):
our own podcast.
But for others, who just can'tquite break through that wall
because it's just in theirnature, covid or not, they were
always going to be introverts.
Covid or not, they were alwaysgoing to be introverts.
Covid or not, they were alwaysgoing to be not quite the guy
you know, they were never goingto be that guy.
And now it's made it even worse.
(08:47):
And with COVID creating thisstructure in the dating modern
world where we are basically onebig gym, we are one big 1980s
prom where half the boys are inone side and the girls are on
the other and no one's dancingin the middle.
And the problem was created byus, by, in fact, women, making
(09:15):
it impossible for men to evenwant to come near us, because
the feminists of the era, and Isay feminist because I tend to
think women that are of the mindlike me, that are more of the
feminine era, more of thefeminine state, enjoy a
(09:37):
respectable catcall.
You wanna tell me I look good?
Thank you, I appreciate it.
I welcome it when it's notaggressive.
But the feminists are themindset no, don't look at me,
don't even open my door, I'mgonna pay for my meal.
(09:57):
And then they wonder why theycan't find good men After 2020,
dating structure.
Feminists really were trying tojust cram it down our throats.
Fuck men, don't look at us.
The Me Too movement went intohigh gear.
(10:17):
It made the women who reallywere going through it not be
believed, because then we hadAmber Heard and I'm literally
thinking of it as I'm sittinghere with you right now, that
the problem that was created byus as a society is now being
given to you as a oh, here's anapp, let's solve the problem.
(10:40):
Well, you know, if we wouldn'thave made it so damn hard, we
wouldn't need an app.
So if the T app was created tobe more of a safety tool and now
it's become this chaotic, viralapp that I'm sure is putting a
(11:02):
lot of money in the pockets ofpeople, while not really having
the knowledge of what could be adetriment of it in five years,
in 10 years or in a year fromnow.
It's something so new, right,that we don't have something to
(11:23):
compare it to.
So here's my take what's abetter alternative?
Well, want to stay safe, wantto empower women, want to weed
out the red flag?
Let's just not torch the entiredating pool.
Let's focus on solutions thatcreate accountability, right,
(11:48):
not shame.
So what would work better Forme, off the top of my head?
A consent-based system, kind ofsomething like Airbnb or Uber,
where both parties mutuallyagree to leave feedback.
Parties mutually agree to leavefeedback.
(12:09):
Something else that would begood someone mentioned on a
TikTok I have no reference tothem, so forgive me but a
community-focused dating forumwhere people can share
experiences educationally, notemotionally reactive.
Emotionally reactive, they saidthink Reddit meets empathy, and
(12:32):
I thought that was brilliant,because what's feeling like to
me is that this is veryemotionally derived instead of
it being educational.
I think another.
In general, as a whole, a bestoption would be to just teach
both of us, men and women, howto fucking communicate.
Boundaries, healthy detachmentof where we can both learn how
(12:55):
to communicate with each otherbecause there is so much power
in becoming the kind of womanwho can red flag and simply walk
away without needing to leave ajust a dog shit of an ad about
(13:18):
him.
I need to work on that onemyself.
If someone takes my ideas, it'sfine, you don't even have to
tell people, it's mine.
I think of the options and thealternatives To make this a
sound and educational.
(13:42):
Like I mentioned earlier,instead of emotionally reactive,
viral moments, something whereboth parties can discuss on each
other, I think would be moreappropriate instead of you know
the big dog shit on a guy.
I get shit on all the time.
(14:04):
I have a thick skin, though Icould care less, and that's part
of what's made me successful,not only in my everyday life
personally, but also work.
You can't be on a public forum.
You can't be on a contentcreating journey and not expect
(14:27):
not only get shit on but noteveryone's going to like you,
and that's also the case indating.
Dating is supposed to be achance for you to get to know
each other and see the red flags, and then you go on to move in
with each other and take it onto the next step.
But the dating and the courtingis where you find out these red
(14:48):
flags.
So what could be a red flag forJennifer in Wisconsin might not
be a red flag for me, becauseof our experiences are so
different and I can guaranteethat the experiences that I go
through personally with men isnot what the average female has
to go through, because theaverage female doesn't have the
(15:09):
baggage that I have, doesn'thave the emotional detachment
that I've had to have in orderto do the work that I used to do
previously and how men can'tcomprehend how I can still be so
feminine and loving when I usedto be pretty much behave like a
dude on set in order for me towork.
(15:31):
Because why didn't I fall inlove with everyone?
Right, and I've discussed thatin previous episodes.
Take a look, take a listen andbinge on that.
But moving forward here, withreal life situations such as the
T app, it becomes more and moreevident that the bottom line of
(15:53):
so much hardships that we'rehaving with dating is that us
females have been fed a fairytale.
The goal of so many is thewhite picket fence, yet the goal
for so many others is just tobe a corporate girl, and the
(16:15):
goal for so many others is to bea mom and the goal for so many
others is to not be a mom.
We are basing these criticalred flags on this IT app on the
basis that we all want the samething, so you shitting on one
guy is probably perfect for me.
(16:38):
The work put into the app, I'msure, was extensive.
I'm not privy to the focusgroups that they had and really
hoping that they took intoaccount what could be at the end
and, dare I say, I don't thinkthey give a fuck.
I don't think they give a fuckas to how men feel about it,
(16:59):
cause this is, you know, girls,girls app.
With that being said, this isgoing to be a very interesting
movement.
Being said, this is going to bea very interesting movement.
I'm not going to get on the app.
I personally is not somethingthat I feel is necessary for
what I'm going through.
Dating-wise.
I for sure think that we shouldgive men a little bit more
(17:20):
grace.
I can't believe that's comingfrom me.
To answer the dear Bridgetquestion, no, I don't think the
TF is a good idea, not becausewomen shouldn't speak up, it's
not because of that, but it'sbecause there's just a
difference.
There's a difference betweenhealing and humiliating.
(17:44):
And fellas, if you're listening, we see you, and I want this to
be a space that includes yourperspective too.
I definitely I'm here for,ladies and gentlemen.
That's the point of BridgetUnfiltered.
I want it to be a space whereboth men and women feel seen,
(18:07):
called in and entertained, allwhile we try to figure out this
fucking jungle together.
I'm going through a journey, andI'm sure most of my listeners
going through their own journey,so if you enjoyed today's
episode, make sure to leave afive star review, subscribe and
(18:27):
share it with your group.
The toxic ones and the onesthat are healing.
You know the vibes.
I have more to say and I'mgoing to put it on the blog,
which you can 100% subscribe toat BridgetUnfilteredcom, and I
will catch you next week.
This was not on the agenda, butI needed to give a little bit
(18:49):
of my perspective on it.
Can't wait to hear yours.
Keep your tea hot, guys, butkeep your standards higher.
Is the T-app making dating worse?
Let's talk about it.
The T-app is the latest viralplatform allowing women to
review their exes and bad dates.
But is this helping or hurtingmodern dating culture?
Bridget Unfiltered is gonnabreak it all down.
(00:21):
Stay tuned.
Welcome back to BridgetUnfiltered, the podcast, where
me, your host, bridget B, comesin with some truths and some
perspectives and point of viewsto hopefully create a bigger and
wider conversation.
(00:43):
And today, oh boy, today, we'regoing to sip some piping hot
tea, but not the kind that'sgoing to help your nervous
system, you know.
Not some good chamomile tea,which I love, with a little bit
of ginger.
It's just delicious.
But no, no, no, we're talkingabout the new tea app.
(01:06):
Ladies and gentlemen, nowlisten.
Y'all know I love my girls, I'mpro calling out trash behavior
and I've had my fair share oflet's call them learning
experiences in the dating world,between the dating world men
(01:28):
coming across at the expos AVNstrip club, you name it.
But I've also been asked aboutthis so many times in my DMs
that I figured let's just do afull Dear Bridget episode.
So that's what you're gettingtoday.
Today's question is DearBridget, have you heard about
(01:50):
the T-Hap?
Do you think it's a good wayfor women to protect each other
from bad men in dating.
Ladies and gentlemen, buckle up.
The question that was asked isbasically just taking bits from
all the questions, I would sayat least 50, maybe 55, 60.
(02:13):
I wasn't counting, it was aboutunder 100, but just sorting
through this week and we had acompletely different episode set
up for you.
But we all looked at each otherand we're like we need to dive
into this one and let's just getinto it.
What is a T-app and, for fuck'ssake, why is it trending?
So if you haven't heard yet,the T-app is this new invite
(02:37):
only platform and launched in2024.
The premise women can leaveanonymous reviews about men
they've dated.
Basically a Yelp for men, butfor real life dating experiences
.
You search a guy's name and ifsomeone added him to the
database, you might find areview Think ghosted after three
(03:02):
months, or he's really nice butemotionally unavailable, or
girls.
He took me out to dinner andmade me pay half.
I know this one's gonna rufflesome feathers Made me pay for
half the dinner on our firstdate, or whatever it could be.
(03:26):
It was originally designed as asafety tool, especially for
online dating.
But let's be honest.
Let's be real.
It's going viral for the gossip, not the safeness of it, the
safetiness or the safety net ofit.
It's going viral for the gossip.
It's like I think there was anapp called Rate my Professor in
(03:50):
college.
So imagine the chaos that isensuing as we speak.
And if you're on social media,tiktok especially, you've seen
it, which is why we wanted tobring this to light this week
right away.
The app was co-founded by agroup of female entrepreneurs
who cited a quote need fortransparency in modern dating
(04:13):
culture.
They claim it helps women avoidnarcissists, liars or worse.
Now here's where your girlBridget gets unfiltered.
I totally understand the intentbehind the app I do.
(04:34):
I respect it but just becausesomething feels empowering just
doesn't mean it's going to beproductive in the long term.
Let me hit you with a couple offacts.
That, for me, raises someserious red flags.
(04:57):
Fact number one according toPEW research I want to say Pew,
but I might be completelymisspoken here In 2023, more
than 60% of single men under 35reported struggling with anxiety
around dating, with many citingfear of being judged online or
(05:21):
canceled as a top stressor.
Let that sink in.
We've definitely created aculture where people are already
afraid to date and now we'reasking them to potentially end
up on a public shame app.
To me oh, don't come for me,ladies, but to me this doesn't
(05:46):
protect women.
It just makes intimacy feellike a trap, and it's already
bad enough.
And fact number two in aPsychology Today study in 2022,
women rated emotional safety andauthentic connection as the top
two factors for long-termrelationships.
But here's the kicker guys.
(06:07):
Emotional safety is built inprivate, not with the threat of
public review looming over it.
You know what I mean.
Imagine how these older I sayolder as in celebrities from the
past, when the paparazzi wereall over them like guess who's
(06:27):
dating who and who.
We all know it was for PR stunt.
Now we do, but when we thoughtit was real, oh my gosh, you
couldn't.
We were shocked if anyone madeit past 10 days because there
was just so much scrutiny overit.
No-transcript Is getting it.
(06:52):
How do we expect men or anyoneto be vulnerable, honest or fuck
imperfect If they're worriedthat one awkward date could
potentially make them go viral?
It feels less like safety,ladies and gentlemen, and more
(07:15):
like surveillance One of thethings that I definitely stand
(07:36):
on and a hill survival to putfood on your table, but it also
created a social structure thatwe have yet to be able to kind
of break through.
I truly believe that societycreates its own demise, as it's
(08:01):
very much evident in historyDivision, lack of empathy, lack
of knowledge.
We create our own problems.
Covid came through and we allpretty much fuck if we know how
to have any social skillsanymore.
The ones who do are breakingthrough, and here we are with
(08:25):
our own podcast.
But for others, who just can'tquite break through that wall
because it's just in theirnature, covid or not, they were
always going to be introverts.
Covid or not, they were alwaysgoing to be introverts.
Covid or not, they were alwaysgoing to be not quite the guy
you know, they were never goingto be that guy.
And now it's made it even worse.
(08:47):
And with COVID creating thisstructure in the dating modern
world where we are basically onebig gym, we are one big 1980s
prom where half the boys are inone side and the girls are on
the other and no one's dancingin the middle.
And the problem was created byus, by, in fact, women, making
(09:15):
it impossible for men to evenwant to come near us, because
the feminists of the era, and Isay feminist because I tend to
think women that are of the mindlike me, that are more of the
feminine era, more of thefeminine state, enjoy a
(09:37):
respectable catcall.
You wanna tell me I look good?
Thank you, I appreciate it.
I welcome it when it's notaggressive.
But the feminists are themindset no, don't look at me,
don't even open my door, I'mgonna pay for my meal.
(09:57):
And then they wonder why theycan't find good men After 2020,
dating structure.
Feminists really were trying tojust cram it down our throats.
Fuck men, don't look at us.
The Me Too movement went intohigh gear.
(10:17):
It made the women who reallywere going through it not be
believed, because then we hadAmber Heard and I'm literally
thinking of it as I'm sittinghere with you right now, that
the problem that was created byus as a society is now being
given to you as a oh, here's anapp, let's solve the problem.
(10:40):
Well, you know, if we wouldn'thave made it so damn hard, we
wouldn't need an app.
So if the T app was created tobe more of a safety tool and now
it's become this chaotic, viralapp that I'm sure is putting a
(11:02):
lot of money in the pockets ofpeople, while not really having
the knowledge of what could be adetriment of it in five years,
in 10 years or in a year fromnow.
It's something so new, right,that we don't have something to
(11:23):
compare it to.
So here's my take what's abetter alternative?
Well, want to stay safe, wantto empower women, want to weed
out the red flag?
Let's just not torch the entiredating pool.
Let's focus on solutions thatcreate accountability, right,
(11:48):
not shame.
So what would work better Forme, off the top of my head?
A consent-based system, kind ofsomething like Airbnb or Uber,
where both parties mutuallyagree to leave feedback.
Parties mutually agree to leavefeedback.
(12:09):
Something else that would begood someone mentioned on a
TikTok I have no reference tothem, so forgive me but a
community-focused dating forumwhere people can share
experiences educationally, notemotionally reactive.
Emotionally reactive, they saidthink Reddit meets empathy, and
(12:32):
I thought that was brilliant,because what's feeling like to
me is that this is veryemotionally derived instead of
it being educational.
I think another.
In general, as a whole, a bestoption would be to just teach
both of us, men and women, howto fucking communicate.
Boundaries, healthy detachmentof where we can both learn how
(12:55):
to communicate with each otherbecause there is so much power
in becoming the kind of womanwho can red flag and simply walk
away without needing to leave ajust a dog shit of an ad about
(13:18):
him.
I need to work on that onemyself.
If someone takes my ideas, it'sfine, you don't even have to
tell people, it's mine.
I think of the options and thealternatives To make this a
sound and educational.
(13:42):
Like I mentioned earlier,instead of emotionally reactive,
viral moments, something whereboth parties can discuss on each
other, I think would be moreappropriate instead of you know
the big dog shit on a guy.
I get shit on all the time.
(14:04):
I have a thick skin, though Icould care less, and that's part
of what's made me successful,not only in my everyday life
personally, but also work.
You can't be on a public forum.
You can't be on a contentcreating journey and not expect
(14:27):
not only get shit on but noteveryone's going to like you,
and that's also the case indating.
Dating is supposed to be achance for you to get to know
each other and see the red flags, and then you go on to move in
with each other and take it onto the next step.
But the dating and the courtingis where you find out these red
(14:48):
flags.
So what could be a red flag forJennifer in Wisconsin might not
be a red flag for me, becauseof our experiences are so
different and I can guaranteethat the experiences that I go
through personally with men isnot what the average female has
to go through, because theaverage female doesn't have the
(15:09):
baggage that I have, doesn'thave the emotional detachment
that I've had to have in orderto do the work that I used to do
previously and how men can'tcomprehend how I can still be so
feminine and loving when I usedto be pretty much behave like a
dude on set in order for me towork.
(15:31):
Because why didn't I fall inlove with everyone?
Right, and I've discussed thatin previous episodes.
Take a look, take a listen andbinge on that.
But moving forward here, withreal life situations such as the
T app, it becomes more and moreevident that the bottom line of
(15:53):
so much hardships that we'rehaving with dating is that us
females have been fed a fairytale.
The goal of so many is thewhite picket fence, yet the goal
for so many others is just tobe a corporate girl, and the
(16:15):
goal for so many others is to bea mom and the goal for so many
others is to not be a mom.
We are basing these criticalred flags on this IT app on the
basis that we all want the samething, so you shitting on one
guy is probably perfect for me.
(16:38):
The work put into the app, I'msure, was extensive.
I'm not privy to the focusgroups that they had and really
hoping that they took intoaccount what could be at the end
and, dare I say, I don't thinkthey give a fuck.
I don't think they give a fuckas to how men feel about it,
(16:59):
cause this is, you know, girls,girls app.
With that being said, this isgoing to be a very interesting
movement.
Being said, this is going to bea very interesting movement.
I'm not going to get on the app.
I personally is not somethingthat I feel is necessary for
what I'm going through.
Dating-wise.
I for sure think that we shouldgive men a little bit more
(17:20):
grace.
I can't believe that's comingfrom me.
To answer the dear Bridgetquestion, no, I don't think the
TF is a good idea, not becausewomen shouldn't speak up, it's
not because of that, but it'sbecause there's just a
difference.
There's a difference betweenhealing and humiliating.
(17:44):
And fellas, if you're listening, we see you, and I want this to
be a space that includes yourperspective too.
I definitely I'm here for,ladies and gentlemen.
That's the point of BridgetUnfiltered.
I want it to be a space whereboth men and women feel seen,
(18:07):
called in and entertained, allwhile we try to figure out this
fucking jungle together.
I'm going through a journey, andI'm sure most of my listeners
going through their own journey,so if you enjoyed today's
episode, make sure to leave afive star review, subscribe and
(18:27):
share it with your group.
The toxic ones and the onesthat are healing.
You know the vibes.
I have more to say and I'mgoing to put it on the blog,
which you can 100% subscribe toat BridgetUnfilteredcom, and I
will catch you next week.
This was not on the agenda, butI needed to give a little bit
(18:49):
of my perspective on it.
Can't wait to hear yours.
Keep your tea hot, guys, butkeep your standards higher.
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