April 9, 2025 • 30 mins
Jamie M. Lima and Andra Davidson discuss the overwhelming nature of divorce and emphasize the importance of a divorce coach in managing the process. They highlight the necessity of building a support team to cultivate resilience and confidence. The episode delves into strategies for resilience, including creating a personal mission statement. Financial considerations are addressed, with a focus on understanding one's financial picture and navigating financial decisions while overcoming societal shame. The conversation encourages taking small steps and utilizing professional resources for support, concluding with appreciation for the role of divorce coaches.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome back to another episode of broke up,not broken.
(00:02):
I'm your host, Jamie Lima, and founder ofAllegiant Divorce Solutions where we help
people prepare for, navigate, and recoverfinancially from divorce.
This podcast is your one stop shop formastering your life and your finances
throughout the entire process.
In today's episode, we're gonna be speakingwith Andrea Davidson, a strength based
collaboratively trained professional divorcecoach and mediator fiercely committed to
(00:26):
helping men and women who are tangled in theweb of divorce to rediscover their confidence,
reduce conflict, and move unapologeticallytowards a fulfilling future.
Today, we're gonna be discussing strategies fornavigating the challenging waters of divorce
with resilience and financial wisdom.
So grab a cup of coffee or your beverage ofchoice, buckle up, and let's once again get you
(00:47):
financially and personally empowered.
Andrea, it's so great to have you here with ustoday.
Great to be here.
Thanks for having me, Jamie.
I appreciate you joining us here today.
I think we've got a lot to talk about.
I mean, we've only got a, you know, a briefcall here today, but there's a lot.
I mean, especially with the work you do as adivorce coach and spoke helping people
navigate, you know, not only the emotional, butalso the financial nuances of divorce.
(01:09):
Yeah.
There there is so much.
And as I know, you've been through thispersonally.
I've been through it personally.
We really have a sense of how overwhelming thewhole process can be and that looking at it in
its entirety so that you can break it down intomanageable pieces, knowing that that overwhelm
(01:30):
is understandable and nothing to be ashamed of.
It just is what it is.
That's part of the process.
So knowing that and addressing it by breakingit down into little manageable pieces can be a
big help.
%.
And I I I really wish I would have hiredsomeone like you to get me through my own
divorce.
It's
I wish I would have too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you
(01:51):
I didn't know about me either.
So
Craziness.
Right?
I mean, like, if if you listen to any any of,you know, the the previous episodes, I I bring
this up a lot where it's like like, I I reallywish that I had someone like you in my corner.
And, you know, I I I did have a therapist, youknow, to help me kind of on the psychological
aspect of things.
But, you know, that was like a, you know, a onehour, you know, or forty five minute
(02:13):
conversation, one time a week or whatever itwas.
But really having somebody like you to shepherdme through the process would have been ideal.
But I guess for those that don't know what adivorce coach does specifically, can you kind
of walk us through that?
Yeah.
In fact, I was going to say that's a greatjumping off point actually, because there tends
to be some confusion around the differencebetween coaching and therapy.
(02:35):
And I think it's really important for people tounderstand the difference.
And I'm happy to give a little, you know, oneon one on what divorce coaching is.
But divorce coaching is a very flexible, goaloriented process that differs for each person
because everybody's divorce is unique.
As you know, every situation is a little bitdifferent.
(02:56):
People come to it with different history,background, primary issues, some pain points,
you know, that you experience might be entirelydifferent than what I went through or what
somebody else is going through.
So the idea with coaching is to do what I sortof talked about in the beginning there, reduce
that overwhelm into manageable pieces and makea plan.
(03:19):
And like you said, help shepherd each personthrough it.
So that can look like helping them to buildtheir team, helping them to navigate
communication, co parenting, get organized, askthe right questions, figure out how to best
utilize their professional team.
That can be a really big one when you'resending your attorney, for example, five
(03:44):
different emails a week about, you know, allkinds of different things that your bills can
start to escalate really quickly.
So some help, I always say it's a little bitcounterintuitive to add another team to bring
your cost down, add another team member tobring your cost down.
But it actually does do that because when youget really organized and you start utilizing
(04:07):
people for their area of expertise, it's mostdefinitely to your benefit.
So that's a very broad definition of coaching.
You know, it's a very flexible goal orientedprocess that's specific to each person.
And can it look different for each person?
There is a big difference between coaching andtherapy.
(04:27):
As you mentioned, a therapist, you're oftenmeeting with someone maybe once a week.
A lot of times therapists, as they should be,are looking backwards, right, at your history,
your patterns, your behavior choices, yourrelationship choices to help you get an
understanding of what brought you to thispoint, and then to evaluate what choices you
(04:49):
might wanna make the same or different goingforward.
And that's really important.
They might also be doing a diagnosis.
They might also be recommending medication insome cases.
None of those things are happening in coaching.
So it can complement your therapist reallybeautifully, but it's not the same thing
(05:11):
because your divorce coach is often with youright in the minute, in the thick of things on
a day to day basis.
My private coaching clients have almost fullaccess to me, meaning they text me, they call
me, they email me, they let me know ifsomething comes up, and we respond in the
(05:32):
moment.
So that's very different than the relationshipthat people have with their therapist where,
you know, you wait for that next week out tohave another conversation with them.
We're really in the thick of it each day.
Yeah.
And you you brought up a good point earlierwhere it's where you said it sounds
counterintuitive to add all these people to themix, so to speak.
But I having walked this path myself just likeyou looking back, I I know had I had someone
(06:00):
like you in my corner and maybe even hire myown financial planner.
Even though I'm a certified financial planner,I've been doing this work for twenty years
myself, having just a neutral third party, asecond set of eyes on things would probably
have saved me so much time and emotionalturmoil and money and everything else in in the
long run.
And, you know, that's the
(06:20):
It's hard to see your own challenges and issuesthe way you might see somebody else's.
So Yeah.
I think that's probably really valid, but it'shard for you to have looked at your own things
and separate yourself the way you might be ableto do for another client.
Incredibly incredibly challenging.
And that's why I tell people all the time,like, that's where, you know, creating team you
(06:41):
is essential in divorce and, you know, havingthe therapist and having the divorce coach.
And, of course, you know, many of us can't getthrough the divorce process without having the
legal help.
Thankfully, you know, there there are a lot ofI'm a certified mediator as well, and we do a
lot of mediation cases where we're helpingpeople through the divorce process and it's
amicable and they're able to work it outthemselves.
(07:02):
But Yeah.
That's a very small fraction of of the peoplethat we work with.
Most are you know, there is there is litigationgoing on and they need help with with, you
know, on the legal side of things.
And that's, you know, it's it gets incrediblycostly if you're gonna have your attorney do
all the work for you.
It's the the analogy I use all the time is weall have a family doctor we go to.
(07:22):
Right?
We have the general practitioner that we go getour annual physical.
And if we have a cough or a cold, we go see himor her and, you know, they triage us, they give
us some medicine, we move on.
Right?
But Right.
If we had cancer or some other tragic thinghappening in our lives health wise, the general
practitioner is not gonna be the one to do the,you know, open heart surgery on you, so to
(07:44):
speak.
Right?
You go to the specialist.
Why?
Because they're gonna do it faster, moreeffective.
The the there's a higher probability of a morefavorable outcome.
All these reasons.
Right?
And so many people make the mistake that theythey and they use their attorney as that
general practitioner, so to speak, in thedivorce case.
And that attorney can't doesn't know anythingabout finances half the time.
It's certainly not gonna help you on the on theon the emotional aspects of things.
(08:07):
Right.
And when the dust settles on the divorce,they're gonna disappear.
Whereas you and I are still gonna be there tohold their hand for the into the next phase.
Right.
And that's a big part of our process is to getpeople set up for that next phase so that they
don't, you know, cross that finish line and go,what now?
(08:27):
Where do I start?
What do I do?
You know, that's a big part of in fact, that'ssome of the best part, right, is helping people
realize that there is this life after divorce,even though it doesn't feel like it when
they're in the thick of it right now.
But there is a life and things can be betterthan they probably ever expected.
(08:48):
As surprising as that is to hear for mostpeople who are buried by the realities of the
process at this time.
Having a coach to help you or and or I shouldsay a CDFA, you know, financial support to help
you see that, you know, there is a horizon.
(09:09):
Keep your chin up.
There are gonna be some good things that occur.
That's partly what I see as my job is to helppeople regain their strength, find their
confidence again, remember that they're worthyof a fulfilling future.
They deserve that.
We can feel so depleted and so low duringdivorce.
(09:31):
And our confidence is shot.
We don't feel like we're ever gonna beattractive to anybody again.
How are we ever gonna get out there?
Why would anybody ever wanna date me again?
I feel so, you know, bad about myself.
Changing that and having somebody cheerlead foryou a little bit, be your advocate, remind you
that you really are worthy and have a lot ofamazing attributes that other people will
(09:54):
hopefully come to see as well Mhmm.
Is something I love doing.
That's a big part of what makes my job reallyfulfilling.
When you're in the throes of it, though, how doyou help or, like, what are some of the things
that people can think about and maybe even someactionable steps people can take to just
maintain that level of, like, resilience.
Right?
Resilience is a theme that we talk a lot aboutin the in the show with other other
(10:16):
professionals and myself.
Like but when you're in the throes of it, it'sso hard to, like some days just to get out of
bed, never mind, start thinking about, like,oh, well, what am I what do I wanna do two,
three, five years after the divorce is over?
It's like, just wanna get through today.
Yeah.
So true.
Right?
Today sometimes is just the only obstacle youcan deal with one thing at a time.
(10:38):
So I have a lot of strategies that I use withclients to help them develop that resilience.
So I love that question.
The first thing is everybody needs a supportsystem.
Right?
Nobody should have to do this alone.
And I know you say that a lot.
You're not alone as you talk to your listeners.
And I say the same thing.
You shouldn't have to do this alone.
(10:58):
People feel like that's a sign of weakness thatthey need a support system or, you know, they
should be tough enough to do this on their own,and I just completely disagree.
And one of the things that I really advocatefor with clients is to help them set up a very
thoughtful and organized support system.
So for example, I like to help people identifywhat are your needs right now during this time.
(11:24):
So for example, if you have little kids athome, maybe what you really want is to have
dinner at home every night.
Or maybe what you really need is to get aworkout in every morning.
Or that dinner is too overwhelming.
So let's just take those couple examples.
Mhmm.
Setting up a support system strategically mightmean aligning your asks with those priorities.
(11:46):
So if you know that what you need is to be homefor dinner every night, that that's your
recharge time with your family, your kids,maybe you set yourself up your work schedule so
that you get your other things done in time tobe home for dinner, that you're very thoughtful
about your schedule so that that can happen.
(12:06):
Maybe when people ask, is there anything I cando for you?
It's to bring dinner so that when you get homefrom a long day at work, it's not something you
have to think about or do, but that youactually then just get to sit down and have
that time with your kids.
Or can you wake up, you know, thirty minutesearly, even if it is a walk around the block,
(12:29):
but just that changes your perspective andgives you the ability to do something for
yourself.
Those alignments where you're figuring out whatyour priorities are and then setting up your
support system to meet those needs can bereally useful as a as a way to do that.
The other thing that I really love to do is tohelp people create a divorce and a personal
(12:53):
mission statement.
Mhmm.
So this is a little bit, you know, unique, Ithink, but we've all heard of personal mission
statements.
People have them a lot and certainly inbusiness and companies have them, of course.
But I really like to take that same idea andapply it to this time in your life.
This is a really unique and limited andchallenging time in your life.
(13:17):
So what kind of values and goals and specificscan you put around it in order to guide you as
you go through it?
So what I mean by that is if you've come upwith some of your goals are that you wanna be a
healthy co parent.
I'm gonna use that because it's one that comesup a lot.
(13:38):
I wanna be a good co parent.
I wanna minimize the impact of this on my kids.
Mhmm.
So how might you do that when push comes toshove when you're making decisions?
When you're actually faced with a difficultdecision and that mission is in the back of
your mind and you use it as a sounding boardfor yourself as you make decisions, it makes
(14:04):
them a lot easier because it's much easier toevaluate.
Is this gonna get me to my goals?
Is this a reflection of the values that I'vesaid are most important to me during this time?
Is it gonna help me to get where I want to be?
The answer becomes much more readily availablethan if you were to evaluate each situation as
(14:27):
it comes up.
Because we're often so depleted that it'sreally hard to make the best possible decision
over and over and over again.
But when you have a clear mission statementthat's guiding you through this process, it's
so much easier.
And I do have a workbook on my website that'sfree.
(14:48):
Anybody can download it that has this templatethat you're welcome to use if it's of use to
you.
And it's got a couple examples in there of ofmission statements.
So I encourage anyone who finds that that sortof speaks to them as a a a way to guide
themselves through the process to takeadvantage of that.
It can be really useful.
And then that's gonna help you make betterfinancial decisions too.
(15:10):
Exactly.
It helps you make all of them.
Right?
Because if you start to go through as part ofyour mission statement and figure out these big
picture goals, you could apply those same kindsof things to what are my financial goals.
Right?
And specifically, how do I want to what do Ineed to come out of this okay?
What do I want and what do I need?
(15:30):
And I know you know those are you know, can bevery different things.
Right?
So for everybody to have that conversation withthemselves at the very least, and it's it's
hard.
You have to be honest with yourself.
We all know we want we don't no one wants tochange their lifestyle, you know, to go
backwards financially, but divorce does createchallenges that you're gonna have to deal with
(15:56):
with that.
It's you know, you're gonna take a four zeroone k in most cases and divide it in two.
It's not gonna be what it was.
Right?
Instead of one family, you're supporting you.
Your your family becomes two familiesessentially.
So how do you manage that?
What are your financial and emotionalstrategies look like?
Because it is an adjustment.
(16:17):
How do you how do you where do you anticipatethe challenges in that adjustment?
And how might you use some goal setting and amission statement to help you get through that
feeling like I'm being true to myself and trueto the values that are important to
me?
Yeah.
Well, so now that we're we've made this naturalsegue into the financial aspects of divorce,
(16:38):
which is which is amazing.
Yeah.
Like, so what are I I I have my own opinion onsome of the most important financial
considerations that people face, especially atthe beginning stages of a divorce.
Right?
You see the you see this through a differentlens.
So so from your perspective, what are some ofthe most important you know, let's say we're
just starting this process and we now have amission statement, and we I've been working
(17:01):
with you for a little while.
Now I've got to start thinking through some ofthe financial decisions that I'm gonna have to
make.
From your perspective, what are the mostimportant ones?
Well, the most important thing that I tellclients is to get educated, to really
understand their financial picture.
So sometimes, you know, I think this is truefor me.
(17:21):
I'm sure it's true for you as well that you'reworking with one spouse or the other.
And oftentimes, one person was the one who wasin charge of paying bills or, you know, setting
up the home finances, managing that on a day today basis.
And if you're that person, I look at your jobas two things, to help educate your spouse
(17:44):
because they need that information to make gooddecisions, and it's all gonna come out anyway.
You you're not don't hide any of those things.
It's silly.
It's short term.
It's not gonna help you.
To the extent that you can help educate yourpartner about what is there, what everything
looks like, it's gonna save you time and moneybecause then somebody else doesn't have to go
(18:07):
dig it up.
And then they start to get educated, they don'thave to pay the experts to do all that for
them.
So I would say the first thing, and if you'rethe person who doesn't have access to that
information, the first thing I like to tellclients about that is to get as much
information as you can about your situation.
Where are your accounts located?
(18:27):
What accounts do you have?
What passwords and logins are out there?
You know, what are the insurance brokerage,retirement, all those kinds of things.
Right?
Just to get as much of a handle on the broadersituation as you possibly can.
And if you don't know, make a list of what youdon't know.
Say, I think we have these, but I don't know.
(18:50):
And then I always recommend they find somebodylike you.
Because to the extent that you don't know whatyou don't know, in this case, it can be
extremely, you know, dangerous to you not tohave all that information.
You need a really whole picture of yourfinances and your life in order to make good
(19:11):
decisions.
So gather as much information as possible andthen get the support to figure out what else
you need to know to get that picture.
Be willing to ask for help and let that helpinto your life so that you can make good
decisions.
Love it.
Love it.
There's music to my ears because and and andlisteners, I mean, even if you're not going
(19:34):
through a divorce, even or if you decide ifyou're on the tail end of a divorce and and
you're thinking it through, like, future whatmy future life is gonna look like and maybe
future relationships and so on, like, you needto bring your spouse into the mix as it relates
to your finances.
I've been again, I've been doing this work forI've been a certified financial planner for
(19:55):
many, many years, financial planner for almosttwenty years, and I've worked with thousands of
people.
In in my old life before I ran my owncompanies, I worked for a big name firm where I
had 450 households I was responsible for.
If every household has two people in it, I hadabout a thousand clients just in that one
company that I worked for years ago.
And they were they enter it all the time.
(20:19):
I would go to the I would go out walk you know,there'd be an appointment with this, you know,
this this family.
I go to the front lobby, and sure enough,there's one person there representing the
family.
The family.
Yeah.
And I've and I'm like, well, where's, you know,where's the missus or where's your spouse?
Like, whatever.
Like, oh, well, they couldn't make it, or theyhave this thing.
Like, you are doing your family a disservice ifyou are not participating in the financial
(20:43):
decisions and understanding what you have andall the other stuff.
Because one of these days, whether by divorceor by death, there's a high probability that
your spouse is not gonna be with us, and you'regonna be left to pick up the pieces.
And if you don't have a clue where your stuffis and where all the bodies are buried, so to
speak, it is gonna be a problem.
So I cannot I've
I've been there too long.
(21:04):
For bringing that up.
Yeah.
And and I could not agree more.
I have been there too, not only from divorce,but we lost well, my ex husband's mother died
and her will, and it just wasn't as organizedas it should have been.
And we didn't necessarily know where everythingwas.
And to say that it was a mess that cost afortune is an understatement.
(21:27):
And she was sick, and there were good reasonsthat it didn't get as organized as it could
have.
And we, you know, I'm not trying to pointfingers.
I'm just saying that all of us have aresponsibility to our kids and our family to
get our information as organized and puttogether as possible to make it easier on the
(21:49):
loved ones around us later.
It's a huge thing I see come up over and overand over again.
And for people who are thinking about divorce.
If you're thinking about it, but you haven'tgone there yet or filed or, you know, contacted
any professionals, start that spreadsheet ofwhat are the accounts that I have?
What are the logins and the passwords?
(22:10):
What kind of balances do I think I have inthese?
What credit cards are out there?
Start making that list.
I always recommend that as a really importantfirst step when people say, I'm not, you know,
ready to move forward yet.
What should I be doing to get prepared?
Digging into your finances, I think is stepone.
Yeah.
Really understanding the the landscape so thatyou can make good decisions for yourself is so
(22:33):
important.
And if and if you don't have the information,like you said earlier, it's okay.
It's better to know what you don't have.
The and write that down and ask questions aboutit later.
We people people come to us and like, I I wehave, you know, I don't know, 40 or 50 cases or
something going on right now.
And there's so many of them that are just in astalemate because people are like, well, I
(22:55):
don't really have the information, so I have toget this like, it's like, okay.
Just no problem.
Just send us what you do have, and let us putthe you know, let's you know, we're we're
building a puzzle.
Right?
And anybody out there that's built a puzzle,whether it's, you know, one of those little kid
ones where there's 10 pieces or whetherthere's, like, one that my wife would build
where, you know, there's, like, a thousandpieces, which would take, like, four days to
(23:15):
put together, you're still usually starting byputting the pieces together on the outside.
Right?
That's what we do.
So send us the account statements.
Send us the tax bill the the tax return fromlast year.
Let's just start putting that framework inplace, and we can figure out what's missing
later.
And I think I think that's an amazing pointbecause so many people are like, well, I've
(23:37):
gotta get we send them a list of, you know, 10or 15 things that they need to start gathering,
and they don't even start the it's analysis byparalysis, or they're just like, okay.
Well, you know, I'm gonna wait till I have allthis stuff, and and that that day may never
come.
So it's like you just have to get started.
It's so I I think part of the challenge ofdivorce is that there's societal shame and
(24:04):
overwhelm associated with it.
And I think this can be in that category,honestly.
People sometimes feel ashamed that they don'thave access to that information or, you know,
embarrassed if they don't know where to look orthat they haven't been more of a participant in
this important aspect of their family's livesup to this date.
But I I really would encourage anybody who's inthat boat to be kind to themselves as you go
(24:31):
through this process.
You're not the first.
You won't be the last.
And there are amazing people out there likeJamie helping you to assemble that puzzle.
And it's okay to say this is as much as I haveright now.
Sometimes it's so overwhelming that we do getparalyzed and that can be with different
(24:54):
aspects.
For for a lot of people, it is the financialcomponent of divorce.
For others, it's the parenting plan or, youknow, figuring out how to sell their house, for
example, if that's been something that'simportant in their lives.
So whatever that trigger is for you, if it isthe finances, and I I say that because
(25:15):
obviously that's your area of focus and it sooften is what is the trigger for people.
Try to just be kind to yourself and know thatthere's not judgment when you come to someone
like Jamie.
You know, CDFAs see this all the time, andtheir job is to help you sort through the list
and find that stuff.
(25:35):
You can do it in small little bite sizedpieces.
You don't have to do it all in one sittingeither.
Just to start somewhere will hopefully give youthe confidence to know, okay.
This isn't quite as bad as I thought it was,and I can find out these other pieces, and I'll
put it all together.
It may not happen, you know, in three daystime, but it could happen in, you know, three
(25:55):
weeks or four weeks time, and that's fine.
There there usually isn't an emergency relatedto that.
Like, there's a process and there's time builtin to gather the key information.
So you don't have to feel like it has to allhappen in one setting.
Yeah.
But eventually, has to happen.
Right?
Like
Well, exactly.
So right.
(26:16):
You can only put it off for so long.
So Yeah.
You're you're better off, you know, takinglittle bites.
I mean, you know, I I called divorce a shitsandwich.
That's my description.
And, you know, I think part of my job is tomake it a little more digestible for people as
they go through it.
And that's a great example of it.
You can take little bites and that help youmake progress.
(26:39):
Or, you know, in some cases, you might justneed to sit down and take a big giant bite.
But however you do it, you are gonna have toget through it somehow.
And Yeah.
That's why there are professionals available tohelp you, though.
You don't have to do it alone.
Yeah.
Use your resources.
Right?
That's the thing I I go back to all the time.
Use your resources.
Whatever whatever they are, use your resourcesand lean on them as much as you possibly can.
(27:02):
We're coming to the, carte blanche segment ofour, of our conversation.
Is there any message you wanna get across thatmaybe questions I haven't asked or anything,
you know, people can how people can get intouch with you?
Anything you want to share with our listenersthat you think might be helpful.
Sure.
I developed a digital course to get emotionalsupport also.
So, you know, I guess it I feel that it is justso important for people to get the emotional
(27:28):
support that they need because when you don'thave the emotional support, it impacts all the
rest of the process.
So you're not gonna be making as as smart ofbusiness decisions as financial decisions if
you're just so overwhelmed and paralyzed thatyou can't move forward.
So I think the emotional support piece is agreat starting place so that you can make the
(27:52):
best financial and business decisions,parenting decisions for yourself as you go
forward.
But I also know that not everybody can access aprivate coach or wants to for whatever reason.
So I did create a digital course to help peoplemanage those emotions, and they can do it from
home on their own time.
Super affordable.
(28:12):
So that's something that I will put out therethat's available to people.
And if there's, you know, one takeaway, I hopeit's that you that your listeners will remember
to be kind to themselves as they go throughthis.
We can be our own worst critic as we're doingthis, but be gentle with yourself.
Give yourself grace.
This is a really difficult life process, andyou deserve a little bit of peace and support
(28:39):
and kindness.
The same way you would treat probably your bestfriend or your sibling, somebody that you
really care about if they were going throughit.
Try to talk to yourself that same way becauseit's not easy for anybody and hopefully you can
be kind to yourself as you go through it sothat you set yourself up for the future you
deserve.
Yeah.
And people can get access to the workbook andthe worksheet that you mentioned earlier just
(29:03):
through the website.
Right?
Can you remind me of the website?
Yes.
It's better than before divorce.com.
Got it.
Got it.
It.
Lots of free resources and stuff there, and I'malways happy to offer as many as I can to
people.
I feel like that's an important just startingplace, and then you can pick and choose what
works for you.
Yeah.
Well, I appreciate you sharing all that insighttoday.
(29:25):
It's always good to have a good divorce coachon here.
And I know a few of you, and, it's been a greatexperience, talking with folks like you, and
having these conversations.
It's, the work you're doing is is amazing, andand, I'm super appreciative of it.
Like I said, I should've should've hired
two of I love teaming up with good goodprofessionals because we all complement each
(29:47):
other in the areas and help people get throughthis whole big giant, you know, challenge.
Shitshow.
Shitshow.
Shitshow.
Divorce is a shit show for for the most part.
But Yeah.
Thanks again for sharing all that with youtoday.
Listeners, don't worry.
We're gonna put all the links to, you know,Andrew's social media content and the link to
(30:07):
the workbook and the website and everythingelse.
That'll all be in the in the show notes for youto to download and access once this show airs.
For those of you that need any guidance on thefinancial complexities of divorce, don't
hesitate to reach out to us at AllegiantDivorce Solutions.
You can visit that website at allegiant d s dotcom for more expert advice and additional free
resources as well as Andrea's.
(30:29):
Don't forget to subscribe to our podcast formore insightful conversations like this.
And until next time, stay empowered andinformed as you navigate this shit show of a
journey.
Welcome back to another episode of broke up,not broken.
(00:02):
I'm your host, Jamie Lima, and founder ofAllegiant Divorce Solutions where we help
people prepare for, navigate, and recoverfinancially from divorce.
This podcast is your one stop shop formastering your life and your finances
throughout the entire process.
In today's episode, we're gonna be speakingwith Andrea Davidson, a strength based
collaboratively trained professional divorcecoach and mediator fiercely committed to
(00:26):
helping men and women who are tangled in theweb of divorce to rediscover their confidence,
reduce conflict, and move unapologeticallytowards a fulfilling future.
Today, we're gonna be discussing strategies fornavigating the challenging waters of divorce
with resilience and financial wisdom.
So grab a cup of coffee or your beverage ofchoice, buckle up, and let's once again get you
(00:47):
financially and personally empowered.
Andrea, it's so great to have you here with ustoday.
Great to be here.
Thanks for having me, Jamie.
I appreciate you joining us here today.
I think we've got a lot to talk about.
I mean, we've only got a, you know, a briefcall here today, but there's a lot.
I mean, especially with the work you do as adivorce coach and spoke helping people
navigate, you know, not only the emotional, butalso the financial nuances of divorce.
(01:09):
Yeah.
There there is so much.
And as I know, you've been through thispersonally.
I've been through it personally.
We really have a sense of how overwhelming thewhole process can be and that looking at it in
its entirety so that you can break it down intomanageable pieces, knowing that that overwhelm
(01:30):
is understandable and nothing to be ashamed of.
It just is what it is.
That's part of the process.
So knowing that and addressing it by breakingit down into little manageable pieces can be a
big help.
%.
And I I I really wish I would have hiredsomeone like you to get me through my own
divorce.
It's
I wish I would have too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you
(01:51):
I didn't know about me either.
So
Craziness.
Right?
I mean, like, if if you listen to any any of,you know, the the previous episodes, I I bring
this up a lot where it's like like, I I reallywish that I had someone like you in my corner.
And, you know, I I I did have a therapist, youknow, to help me kind of on the psychological
aspect of things.
But, you know, that was like a, you know, a onehour, you know, or forty five minute
(02:13):
conversation, one time a week or whatever itwas.
But really having somebody like you to shepherdme through the process would have been ideal.
But I guess for those that don't know what adivorce coach does specifically, can you kind
of walk us through that?
Yeah.
In fact, I was going to say that's a greatjumping off point actually, because there tends
to be some confusion around the differencebetween coaching and therapy.
(02:35):
And I think it's really important for people tounderstand the difference.
And I'm happy to give a little, you know, oneon one on what divorce coaching is.
But divorce coaching is a very flexible, goaloriented process that differs for each person
because everybody's divorce is unique.
As you know, every situation is a little bitdifferent.
(02:56):
People come to it with different history,background, primary issues, some pain points,
you know, that you experience might be entirelydifferent than what I went through or what
somebody else is going through.
So the idea with coaching is to do what I sortof talked about in the beginning there, reduce
that overwhelm into manageable pieces and makea plan.
(03:19):
And like you said, help shepherd each personthrough it.
So that can look like helping them to buildtheir team, helping them to navigate
communication, co parenting, get organized, askthe right questions, figure out how to best
utilize their professional team.
That can be a really big one when you'resending your attorney, for example, five
(03:44):
different emails a week about, you know, allkinds of different things that your bills can
start to escalate really quickly.
So some help, I always say it's a little bitcounterintuitive to add another team to bring
your cost down, add another team member tobring your cost down.
But it actually does do that because when youget really organized and you start utilizing
(04:07):
people for their area of expertise, it's mostdefinitely to your benefit.
So that's a very broad definition of coaching.
You know, it's a very flexible goal orientedprocess that's specific to each person.
And can it look different for each person?
There is a big difference between coaching andtherapy.
(04:27):
As you mentioned, a therapist, you're oftenmeeting with someone maybe once a week.
A lot of times therapists, as they should be,are looking backwards, right, at your history,
your patterns, your behavior choices, yourrelationship choices to help you get an
understanding of what brought you to thispoint, and then to evaluate what choices you
(04:49):
might wanna make the same or different goingforward.
And that's really important.
They might also be doing a diagnosis.
They might also be recommending medication insome cases.
None of those things are happening in coaching.
So it can complement your therapist reallybeautifully, but it's not the same thing
(05:11):
because your divorce coach is often with youright in the minute, in the thick of things on
a day to day basis.
My private coaching clients have almost fullaccess to me, meaning they text me, they call
me, they email me, they let me know ifsomething comes up, and we respond in the
(05:32):
moment.
So that's very different than the relationshipthat people have with their therapist where,
you know, you wait for that next week out tohave another conversation with them.
We're really in the thick of it each day.
Yeah.
And you you brought up a good point earlierwhere it's where you said it sounds
counterintuitive to add all these people to themix, so to speak.
But I having walked this path myself just likeyou looking back, I I know had I had someone
(06:00):
like you in my corner and maybe even hire myown financial planner.
Even though I'm a certified financial planner,I've been doing this work for twenty years
myself, having just a neutral third party, asecond set of eyes on things would probably
have saved me so much time and emotionalturmoil and money and everything else in in the
long run.
And, you know, that's the
(06:20):
It's hard to see your own challenges and issuesthe way you might see somebody else's.
So Yeah.
I think that's probably really valid, but it'shard for you to have looked at your own things
and separate yourself the way you might be ableto do for another client.
Incredibly incredibly challenging.
And that's why I tell people all the time,like, that's where, you know, creating team you
(06:41):
is essential in divorce and, you know, havingthe therapist and having the divorce coach.
And, of course, you know, many of us can't getthrough the divorce process without having the
legal help.
Thankfully, you know, there there are a lot ofI'm a certified mediator as well, and we do a
lot of mediation cases where we're helpingpeople through the divorce process and it's
amicable and they're able to work it outthemselves.
(07:02):
But Yeah.
That's a very small fraction of of the peoplethat we work with.
Most are you know, there is there is litigationgoing on and they need help with with, you
know, on the legal side of things.
And that's, you know, it's it gets incrediblycostly if you're gonna have your attorney do
all the work for you.
It's the the analogy I use all the time is weall have a family doctor we go to.
(07:22):
Right?
We have the general practitioner that we go getour annual physical.
And if we have a cough or a cold, we go see himor her and, you know, they triage us, they give
us some medicine, we move on.
Right?
But Right.
If we had cancer or some other tragic thinghappening in our lives health wise, the general
practitioner is not gonna be the one to do the,you know, open heart surgery on you, so to
(07:44):
speak.
Right?
You go to the specialist.
Why?
Because they're gonna do it faster, moreeffective.
The the there's a higher probability of a morefavorable outcome.
All these reasons.
Right?
And so many people make the mistake that theythey and they use their attorney as that
general practitioner, so to speak, in thedivorce case.
And that attorney can't doesn't know anythingabout finances half the time.
It's certainly not gonna help you on the on theon the emotional aspects of things.
(08:07):
Right.
And when the dust settles on the divorce,they're gonna disappear.
Whereas you and I are still gonna be there tohold their hand for the into the next phase.
Right.
And that's a big part of our process is to getpeople set up for that next phase so that they
don't, you know, cross that finish line and go,what now?
(08:27):
Where do I start?
What do I do?
You know, that's a big part of in fact, that'ssome of the best part, right, is helping people
realize that there is this life after divorce,even though it doesn't feel like it when
they're in the thick of it right now.
But there is a life and things can be betterthan they probably ever expected.
(08:48):
As surprising as that is to hear for mostpeople who are buried by the realities of the
process at this time.
Having a coach to help you or and or I shouldsay a CDFA, you know, financial support to help
you see that, you know, there is a horizon.
(09:09):
Keep your chin up.
There are gonna be some good things that occur.
That's partly what I see as my job is to helppeople regain their strength, find their
confidence again, remember that they're worthyof a fulfilling future.
They deserve that.
We can feel so depleted and so low duringdivorce.
(09:31):
And our confidence is shot.
We don't feel like we're ever gonna beattractive to anybody again.
How are we ever gonna get out there?
Why would anybody ever wanna date me again?
I feel so, you know, bad about myself.
Changing that and having somebody cheerlead foryou a little bit, be your advocate, remind you
that you really are worthy and have a lot ofamazing attributes that other people will
(09:54):
hopefully come to see as well Mhmm.
Is something I love doing.
That's a big part of what makes my job reallyfulfilling.
When you're in the throes of it, though, how doyou help or, like, what are some of the things
that people can think about and maybe even someactionable steps people can take to just
maintain that level of, like, resilience.
Right?
Resilience is a theme that we talk a lot aboutin the in the show with other other
(10:16):
professionals and myself.
Like but when you're in the throes of it, it'sso hard to, like some days just to get out of
bed, never mind, start thinking about, like,oh, well, what am I what do I wanna do two,
three, five years after the divorce is over?
It's like, just wanna get through today.
Yeah.
So true.
Right?
Today sometimes is just the only obstacle youcan deal with one thing at a time.
(10:38):
So I have a lot of strategies that I use withclients to help them develop that resilience.
So I love that question.
The first thing is everybody needs a supportsystem.
Right?
Nobody should have to do this alone.
And I know you say that a lot.
You're not alone as you talk to your listeners.
And I say the same thing.
You shouldn't have to do this alone.
(10:58):
People feel like that's a sign of weakness thatthey need a support system or, you know, they
should be tough enough to do this on their own,and I just completely disagree.
And one of the things that I really advocatefor with clients is to help them set up a very
thoughtful and organized support system.
So for example, I like to help people identifywhat are your needs right now during this time.
(11:24):
So for example, if you have little kids athome, maybe what you really want is to have
dinner at home every night.
Or maybe what you really need is to get aworkout in every morning.
Or that dinner is too overwhelming.
So let's just take those couple examples.
Mhmm.
Setting up a support system strategically mightmean aligning your asks with those priorities.
(11:46):
So if you know that what you need is to be homefor dinner every night, that that's your
recharge time with your family, your kids,maybe you set yourself up your work schedule so
that you get your other things done in time tobe home for dinner, that you're very thoughtful
about your schedule so that that can happen.
(12:06):
Maybe when people ask, is there anything I cando for you?
It's to bring dinner so that when you get homefrom a long day at work, it's not something you
have to think about or do, but that youactually then just get to sit down and have
that time with your kids.
Or can you wake up, you know, thirty minutesearly, even if it is a walk around the block,
(12:29):
but just that changes your perspective andgives you the ability to do something for
yourself.
Those alignments where you're figuring out whatyour priorities are and then setting up your
support system to meet those needs can bereally useful as a as a way to do that.
The other thing that I really love to do is tohelp people create a divorce and a personal
(12:53):
mission statement.
Mhmm.
So this is a little bit, you know, unique, Ithink, but we've all heard of personal mission
statements.
People have them a lot and certainly inbusiness and companies have them, of course.
But I really like to take that same idea andapply it to this time in your life.
This is a really unique and limited andchallenging time in your life.
(13:17):
So what kind of values and goals and specificscan you put around it in order to guide you as
you go through it?
So what I mean by that is if you've come upwith some of your goals are that you wanna be a
healthy co parent.
I'm gonna use that because it's one that comesup a lot.
(13:38):
I wanna be a good co parent.
I wanna minimize the impact of this on my kids.
Mhmm.
So how might you do that when push comes toshove when you're making decisions?
When you're actually faced with a difficultdecision and that mission is in the back of
your mind and you use it as a sounding boardfor yourself as you make decisions, it makes
(14:04):
them a lot easier because it's much easier toevaluate.
Is this gonna get me to my goals?
Is this a reflection of the values that I'vesaid are most important to me during this time?
Is it gonna help me to get where I want to be?
The answer becomes much more readily availablethan if you were to evaluate each situation as
(14:27):
it comes up.
Because we're often so depleted that it'sreally hard to make the best possible decision
over and over and over again.
But when you have a clear mission statementthat's guiding you through this process, it's
so much easier.
And I do have a workbook on my website that'sfree.
(14:48):
Anybody can download it that has this templatethat you're welcome to use if it's of use to
you.
And it's got a couple examples in there of ofmission statements.
So I encourage anyone who finds that that sortof speaks to them as a a a way to guide
themselves through the process to takeadvantage of that.
It can be really useful.
And then that's gonna help you make betterfinancial decisions too.
(15:10):
Exactly.
It helps you make all of them.
Right?
Because if you start to go through as part ofyour mission statement and figure out these big
picture goals, you could apply those same kindsof things to what are my financial goals.
Right?
And specifically, how do I want to what do Ineed to come out of this okay?
What do I want and what do I need?
(15:30):
And I know you know those are you know, can bevery different things.
Right?
So for everybody to have that conversation withthemselves at the very least, and it's it's
hard.
You have to be honest with yourself.
We all know we want we don't no one wants tochange their lifestyle, you know, to go
backwards financially, but divorce does createchallenges that you're gonna have to deal with
(15:56):
with that.
It's you know, you're gonna take a four zeroone k in most cases and divide it in two.
It's not gonna be what it was.
Right?
Instead of one family, you're supporting you.
Your your family becomes two familiesessentially.
So how do you manage that?
What are your financial and emotionalstrategies look like?
Because it is an adjustment.
(16:17):
How do you how do you where do you anticipatethe challenges in that adjustment?
And how might you use some goal setting and amission statement to help you get through that
feeling like I'm being true to myself and trueto the values that are important to
me?
Yeah.
Well, so now that we're we've made this naturalsegue into the financial aspects of divorce,
(16:38):
which is which is amazing.
Yeah.
Like, so what are I I I have my own opinion onsome of the most important financial
considerations that people face, especially atthe beginning stages of a divorce.
Right?
You see the you see this through a differentlens.
So so from your perspective, what are some ofthe most important you know, let's say we're
just starting this process and we now have amission statement, and we I've been working
(17:01):
with you for a little while.
Now I've got to start thinking through some ofthe financial decisions that I'm gonna have to
make.
From your perspective, what are the mostimportant ones?
Well, the most important thing that I tellclients is to get educated, to really
understand their financial picture.
So sometimes, you know, I think this is truefor me.
(17:21):
I'm sure it's true for you as well that you'reworking with one spouse or the other.
And oftentimes, one person was the one who wasin charge of paying bills or, you know, setting
up the home finances, managing that on a day today basis.
And if you're that person, I look at your jobas two things, to help educate your spouse
(17:44):
because they need that information to make gooddecisions, and it's all gonna come out anyway.
You you're not don't hide any of those things.
It's silly.
It's short term.
It's not gonna help you.
To the extent that you can help educate yourpartner about what is there, what everything
looks like, it's gonna save you time and moneybecause then somebody else doesn't have to go
(18:07):
dig it up.
And then they start to get educated, they don'thave to pay the experts to do all that for
them.
So I would say the first thing, and if you'rethe person who doesn't have access to that
information, the first thing I like to tellclients about that is to get as much
information as you can about your situation.
Where are your accounts located?
(18:27):
What accounts do you have?
What passwords and logins are out there?
You know, what are the insurance brokerage,retirement, all those kinds of things.
Right?
Just to get as much of a handle on the broadersituation as you possibly can.
And if you don't know, make a list of what youdon't know.
Say, I think we have these, but I don't know.
(18:50):
And then I always recommend they find somebodylike you.
Because to the extent that you don't know whatyou don't know, in this case, it can be
extremely, you know, dangerous to you not tohave all that information.
You need a really whole picture of yourfinances and your life in order to make good
(19:11):
decisions.
So gather as much information as possible andthen get the support to figure out what else
you need to know to get that picture.
Be willing to ask for help and let that helpinto your life so that you can make good
decisions.
Love it.
Love it.
There's music to my ears because and and andlisteners, I mean, even if you're not going
(19:34):
through a divorce, even or if you decide ifyou're on the tail end of a divorce and and
you're thinking it through, like, future whatmy future life is gonna look like and maybe
future relationships and so on, like, you needto bring your spouse into the mix as it relates
to your finances.
I've been again, I've been doing this work forI've been a certified financial planner for
(19:55):
many, many years, financial planner for almosttwenty years, and I've worked with thousands of
people.
In in my old life before I ran my owncompanies, I worked for a big name firm where I
had 450 households I was responsible for.
If every household has two people in it, I hadabout a thousand clients just in that one
company that I worked for years ago.
And they were they enter it all the time.
(20:19):
I would go to the I would go out walk you know,there'd be an appointment with this, you know,
this this family.
I go to the front lobby, and sure enough,there's one person there representing the
family.
The family.
Yeah.
And I've and I'm like, well, where's, you know,where's the missus or where's your spouse?
Like, whatever.
Like, oh, well, they couldn't make it, or theyhave this thing.
Like, you are doing your family a disservice ifyou are not participating in the financial
(20:43):
decisions and understanding what you have andall the other stuff.
Because one of these days, whether by divorceor by death, there's a high probability that
your spouse is not gonna be with us, and you'regonna be left to pick up the pieces.
And if you don't have a clue where your stuffis and where all the bodies are buried, so to
speak, it is gonna be a problem.
So I cannot I've
I've been there too long.
(21:04):
For bringing that up.
Yeah.
And and I could not agree more.
I have been there too, not only from divorce,but we lost well, my ex husband's mother died
and her will, and it just wasn't as organizedas it should have been.
And we didn't necessarily know where everythingwas.
And to say that it was a mess that cost afortune is an understatement.
(21:27):
And she was sick, and there were good reasonsthat it didn't get as organized as it could
have.
And we, you know, I'm not trying to pointfingers.
I'm just saying that all of us have aresponsibility to our kids and our family to
get our information as organized and puttogether as possible to make it easier on the
(21:49):
loved ones around us later.
It's a huge thing I see come up over and overand over again.
And for people who are thinking about divorce.
If you're thinking about it, but you haven'tgone there yet or filed or, you know, contacted
any professionals, start that spreadsheet ofwhat are the accounts that I have?
What are the logins and the passwords?
(22:10):
What kind of balances do I think I have inthese?
What credit cards are out there?
Start making that list.
I always recommend that as a really importantfirst step when people say, I'm not, you know,
ready to move forward yet.
What should I be doing to get prepared?
Digging into your finances, I think is stepone.
Yeah.
Really understanding the the landscape so thatyou can make good decisions for yourself is so
(22:33):
important.
And if and if you don't have the information,like you said earlier, it's okay.
It's better to know what you don't have.
The and write that down and ask questions aboutit later.
We people people come to us and like, I I wehave, you know, I don't know, 40 or 50 cases or
something going on right now.
And there's so many of them that are just in astalemate because people are like, well, I
(22:55):
don't really have the information, so I have toget this like, it's like, okay.
Just no problem.
Just send us what you do have, and let us putthe you know, let's you know, we're we're
building a puzzle.
Right?
And anybody out there that's built a puzzle,whether it's, you know, one of those little kid
ones where there's 10 pieces or whetherthere's, like, one that my wife would build
where, you know, there's, like, a thousandpieces, which would take, like, four days to
(23:15):
put together, you're still usually starting byputting the pieces together on the outside.
Right?
That's what we do.
So send us the account statements.
Send us the tax bill the the tax return fromlast year.
Let's just start putting that framework inplace, and we can figure out what's missing
later.
And I think I think that's an amazing pointbecause so many people are like, well, I've
(23:37):
gotta get we send them a list of, you know, 10or 15 things that they need to start gathering,
and they don't even start the it's analysis byparalysis, or they're just like, okay.
Well, you know, I'm gonna wait till I have allthis stuff, and and that that day may never
come.
So it's like you just have to get started.
It's so I I think part of the challenge ofdivorce is that there's societal shame and
(24:04):
overwhelm associated with it.
And I think this can be in that category,honestly.
People sometimes feel ashamed that they don'thave access to that information or, you know,
embarrassed if they don't know where to look orthat they haven't been more of a participant in
this important aspect of their family's livesup to this date.
But I I really would encourage anybody who's inthat boat to be kind to themselves as you go
(24:31):
through this process.
You're not the first.
You won't be the last.
And there are amazing people out there likeJamie helping you to assemble that puzzle.
And it's okay to say this is as much as I haveright now.
Sometimes it's so overwhelming that we do getparalyzed and that can be with different
(24:54):
aspects.
For for a lot of people, it is the financialcomponent of divorce.
For others, it's the parenting plan or, youknow, figuring out how to sell their house, for
example, if that's been something that'simportant in their lives.
So whatever that trigger is for you, if it isthe finances, and I I say that because
(25:15):
obviously that's your area of focus and it sooften is what is the trigger for people.
Try to just be kind to yourself and know thatthere's not judgment when you come to someone
like Jamie.
You know, CDFAs see this all the time, andtheir job is to help you sort through the list
and find that stuff.
(25:35):
You can do it in small little bite sizedpieces.
You don't have to do it all in one sittingeither.
Just to start somewhere will hopefully give youthe confidence to know, okay.
This isn't quite as bad as I thought it was,and I can find out these other pieces, and I'll
put it all together.
It may not happen, you know, in three daystime, but it could happen in, you know, three
(25:55):
weeks or four weeks time, and that's fine.
There there usually isn't an emergency relatedto that.
Like, there's a process and there's time builtin to gather the key information.
So you don't have to feel like it has to allhappen in one setting.
Yeah.
But eventually, has to happen.
Right?
Like
Well, exactly.
So right.
(26:16):
You can only put it off for so long.
So Yeah.
You're you're better off, you know, takinglittle bites.
I mean, you know, I I called divorce a shitsandwich.
That's my description.
And, you know, I think part of my job is tomake it a little more digestible for people as
they go through it.
And that's a great example of it.
You can take little bites and that help youmake progress.
(26:39):
Or, you know, in some cases, you might justneed to sit down and take a big giant bite.
But however you do it, you are gonna have toget through it somehow.
And Yeah.
That's why there are professionals available tohelp you, though.
You don't have to do it alone.
Yeah.
Use your resources.
Right?
That's the thing I I go back to all the time.
Use your resources.
Whatever whatever they are, use your resourcesand lean on them as much as you possibly can.
(27:02):
We're coming to the, carte blanche segment ofour, of our conversation.
Is there any message you wanna get across thatmaybe questions I haven't asked or anything,
you know, people can how people can get intouch with you?
Anything you want to share with our listenersthat you think might be helpful.
Sure.
I developed a digital course to get emotionalsupport also.
So, you know, I guess it I feel that it is justso important for people to get the emotional
(27:28):
support that they need because when you don'thave the emotional support, it impacts all the
rest of the process.
So you're not gonna be making as as smart ofbusiness decisions as financial decisions if
you're just so overwhelmed and paralyzed thatyou can't move forward.
So I think the emotional support piece is agreat starting place so that you can make the
(27:52):
best financial and business decisions,parenting decisions for yourself as you go
forward.
But I also know that not everybody can access aprivate coach or wants to for whatever reason.
So I did create a digital course to help peoplemanage those emotions, and they can do it from
home on their own time.
Super affordable.
(28:12):
So that's something that I will put out therethat's available to people.
And if there's, you know, one takeaway, I hopeit's that you that your listeners will remember
to be kind to themselves as they go throughthis.
We can be our own worst critic as we're doingthis, but be gentle with yourself.
Give yourself grace.
This is a really difficult life process, andyou deserve a little bit of peace and support
(28:39):
and kindness.
The same way you would treat probably your bestfriend or your sibling, somebody that you
really care about if they were going throughit.
Try to talk to yourself that same way becauseit's not easy for anybody and hopefully you can
be kind to yourself as you go through it sothat you set yourself up for the future you
deserve.
Yeah.
And people can get access to the workbook andthe worksheet that you mentioned earlier just
(29:03):
through the website.
Right?
Can you remind me of the website?
Yes.
It's better than before divorce.com.
Got it.
Got it.
It.
Lots of free resources and stuff there, and I'malways happy to offer as many as I can to
people.
I feel like that's an important just startingplace, and then you can pick and choose what
works for you.
Yeah.
Well, I appreciate you sharing all that insighttoday.
(29:25):
It's always good to have a good divorce coachon here.
And I know a few of you, and, it's been a greatexperience, talking with folks like you, and
having these conversations.
It's, the work you're doing is is amazing, andand, I'm super appreciative of it.
Like I said, I should've should've hired
two of I love teaming up with good goodprofessionals because we all complement each
(29:47):
other in the areas and help people get throughthis whole big giant, you know, challenge.
Shitshow.
Shitshow.
Shitshow.
Divorce is a shit show for for the most part.
But Yeah.
Thanks again for sharing all that with youtoday.
Listeners, don't worry.
We're gonna put all the links to, you know,Andrew's social media content and the link to
(30:07):
the workbook and the website and everythingelse.
That'll all be in the in the show notes for youto to download and access once this show airs.
For those of you that need any guidance on thefinancial complexities of divorce, don't
hesitate to reach out to us at AllegiantDivorce Solutions.
You can visit that website at allegiant d s dotcom for more expert advice and additional free
resources as well as Andrea's.
(30:29):
Don't forget to subscribe to our podcast formore insightful conversations like this.
And until next time, stay empowered andinformed as you navigate this shit show of a
journey.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Football’s funniest family duo — Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs — team up to provide next-level access to life in the league as it unfolds. The two brothers and Super Bowl champions drop weekly insights about the weekly slate of games and share their INSIDE perspectives on trending NFL news and sports headlines. They also endlessly rag on each other as brothers do, chat the latest in pop culture and welcome some very popular and well-known friends to chat with them. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. Follow New Heights on the Wondery App, YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free, and get exclusive content on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And join our new membership for a unique fan experience by going to the New Heights YouTube channel now!