April 29, 2025 • 57 mins
In this no-holds-barred conversation, Sarah sits down with Natalie Bullen of Unapologetic Wealth to dismantle the myths about success, entrepreneurship, and identity.
Together, they expose why most entrepreneurs are stuck chasing strategies instead of building real wealth, why belief — not tactics — determines success, and why trying to be liked is the fastest way to stay invisible.
Natalie shares her rise from reluctant entrepreneur to authority and wealth strategist, the brutal truths about entrepreneurship nobody wants to admit, and how to finally stop living for validation. This is not just an episode — it’s a full masterclass in radical self-leadership and decisive action.
Guest Bio:
Natalie Bullen is a Wealth Identity and Authority Coach for high-earning entrepreneurs and affluent professionals. As the founder of Unapologetic Wealth, she helps ambitious women move beyond revenue milestones into true wealth, influence, and power. Her work challenges outdated financial narratives and equips first-generation wealth builders to think, decide, and live like the wealthy women they are becoming.
Connect with Natalie:
- www.unapologeticwealth.com
- www.unapologeticwealth.com/cashmere-club
- https://www.facebook.com/Ladylyricist06
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And if you’re ready to dive even deeper, grab a copy of my book Bite-Sized Blasphemy and ignite your inner fire to do life and business your way.
The Business Blasphemy Podcast is sponsored by Corporate Rehab® Strategic Consulting.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to the Business Blasphemy Podcast,
where we question the sacredtruths of the online business
space and the reverence withwhich they're held.
I'm your host, sarah Khanspeaker, strategic consultant
and BS busting badass.
Join me each week as wechallenge the norms, trends and
overall bullshit status quo ofentrepreneurship to uncover what
it really takes to build thebusiness that you want to build
(00:23):
in a way that honors you, yourlife and your vision for what's
possible, and maybe piss off afew gurus along the way.
So if you're ready to commitbusiness blasphemy, let's do it.
Hello, hello, blasphemers, youare in for a fucking treat, my
friends.
We have today Natalie Bullen,the one and only Nat Bullen.
(00:46):
She's here.
We're going to talk some shit,because you know that's what we
do, but I'm going to let herintroduce herself and then we're
going to dive right into it,because I already know she has a
ton to say.
So, nat, welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Hello, I am so excited.
This is going to be fun.
It's going to be fun.
Yes, I am a accidentalentrepreneur.
I own Unapologetic Wealth.
I'm a recovering sales coachand now I actually admit what I
really do for people, which ishelping them step into their
(01:18):
authority not just being anexpert, but being an authority
so that they can achieve thewealth that they want.
Truthfully, you want to be rich.
If you're listening to this,you want more money, you want
more time off, you want stocksor investments or bonds or to
travel the world.
You want something you don'tpresently have and you think
it's because you don't have theright strategy, you don't have
enough team, you don't chargeenough money, but if you truly
(01:39):
believe that success wasinevitable for you, you would do
different things, and thosedifferent things are what would
generate the success that yousay that you want.
So it's really an identityshift that I provide for people,
more than coaching orconsulting or funnels, and that
has taken me a long time toadmit.
So thank you for asking.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I appreciate that because you know what I see so
much in what you've just said interms of my own journey.
Right, because I started inoperations, I started with
strategy strategic operationsright, because I started in
operations, I started withstrategy.
Yeah, strategic operationsright, like let's help people
build the back end.
And there are so many peoplethat I worked with where I ended
up having to like kind of befor lack of a better word their
conciliary Like this look, weneed to talk, we need to have a
(02:19):
conversation.
Every single day was aconversation about you're not
doing the right things.
Like I can't operationalizeyour business for success until
you're doing the things that youneed to be doing.
And it's interesting how manypeople avoid doing the right
things.
The marketing in this space isso, so good.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah, it's easier to market to disempowered newbies
who believe that they're onefunnel away, like if we look at
the people who are successfuland popular in the area.
That's what they do.
They take people who don't knowanything and they tell them
that they know everything andthen, by staying tethered to
this everlasting communicationsource, that one day they will
(02:58):
be the thing.
But it's not true, and you cantell it's not true, because if
you ask someone a question, likeif you knew you couldn't fail,
what would you do?
It is always somethingdifferent than what they're
doing right now.
Yes, yeah, so like there's asuper easy litmus test for am I
performing at my highest level?
It's literally one question,and if your answer is different
(03:22):
than what you're doing now, thenyou've got an identity shift to
make.
But that is not as compellingto sell as oh, you just need one
tactic, one tweak, one funnel,one new email, one new system,
and then you're going to be amultimillionaire.
That feels much less scary thanyou are going to have to change
the fiber of your being.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
You hit the nail on the head right Everyone wants
the two emails.
All you need is two nine-wordemails and you can make a
million dollars in your nextsale or you know, just posting
fucking income statements andwhatever right, Like it's so
easy to get distracted in thisspace.
Okay, I want to.
I want to pause for a second.
I want to backtrack a littlebit.
Reluctant entrepreneur, Irelate to that.
(04:02):
Tell me how you ended up comingto entrepreneurship, why
reluctant?
Speaker 2 (04:07):
COVID, had there not been a pandemic, I would
absolutely not be anentrepreneur.
I guess being a know-it-all andtalking too much was probably
part of the problem.
Yeah, those qualities didn'thelp me.
You know, when COVID hit, I wasworking two jobs.
So Black people are 12% of thepopulation, but we carry 70
(04:27):
percent of student loan debt,not 17, 70, 70.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so I was working a parttime job to pay my twelve
hundred dollar student loanpayment, even though I had a
full time job at the bank andNBA and securities licenses.
So when COVID hit, they laid meoff my part-time job because
they laid off all thepart-timers, and I was like,
(04:47):
well, that sucks, because that'show I pay my student loan
payment.
You know, even though I'venever had a job that actually
required a degree and we tellourselves that college is not a
scam, felt kind of scammy overhere because I pay more than my
mortgage and car note combinedin student loan payment.
So I said, well, I kind of wentfrom working 60 hours a week, 40
(05:09):
hours at the bank, 20 hourspart time, to working like one
week on at the bank, one weekoff.
We had like a team A and a teamB so in case team A caught
COVID, the whole branch wouldn'thave to shut down.
So I was working 60, 70 hours aweek, 20 hours a week.
I was like this isuncomfortable, I need to fill my
time with something.
And it just so happened thatClubhouse was around and I had
(05:31):
been doing free financialliteracy seminars in the
community.
I've been on TV for them.
And when the school shut downand the churches shut down and
the jobs shut down, who wants afinancial literacy presenter?
So I said, well, I'll just goonline and I'll just disseminate
the information.
And people were like can youcoach me?
You could change my life, canyou coach me?
(05:51):
I'm like I don't really want to.
They're like but no, but youhave to.
I'm begging you.
I'm on bended knee with tearsin my eyes, I beg, I beg and I'm
like I guess so yeah, and I'vealways just taken it too far.
I've always just taken it toofar, like it started off with
just I'm going to have one offeron the side, it's not a problem
.
And then suddenly I wasquitting my job and then I was
like, well, I'm only going tohave like private clients.
(06:12):
And then suddenly we werelaunching like a group.
And then I was like well, we'reonly going to be online and then
suddenly always I'm like a lesslike a non-insane kanye, like
there's always another thing,it's like just one more step,
like one day.
It like I fully believe thatone day I'll wake up a
(06:36):
billionaire with the samefeeling like, yeah, we just took
it too far.
We bought an nhl team, webought like antarctica.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It's like every day is the morning after right.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Yeah, like every day, I wake up and I'm like whoa,
that escalated fast.
Well, I'm really not clear howI have a community that already
has like 20 people in it.
Like that's very confusing, sookay.
From a person who doesn't want acommunity right, from a person
who doesn't run free Facebookgroups to a person who was
supposed to be leaving facebook,like I don't, I don't
(07:07):
understand how any of it happens.
It's.
It's almost like an out-of-body, like you levitate above your
real self and you see yourselfdoing shit and you're like, hey
self, what you got going on downthere and self is like, oh,
don't worry, it's totallyaligned with your plans and
beliefs, it's fine, yeah.
And then it like creates athing and I'm like that's not
(07:28):
aligned with our beliefs andit's like well, it's built now
and we've already sold it, somaybe you should align it to
your beliefs.
Like maybe you should.
It's.
I just I don't know.
I don't know which one is the,the little devil on the shoulder
and which one's the littleangel on the shoulder, because
they both both seem to like Idon't know hopscotch they're
(07:49):
both holding like ends of a jumprope and, like myself, is like
jumping through the rope.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Yeah, it's like I can skip rope.
I can't double dutch.
I don't know what you guys aredoing right Now.
You said something reallyinteresting about a line so
things are happening and they'renot aligned with your beliefs,
but you can align them with yourbeliefs, and that I mean that
right there, the number ofpeople who burn stuff down, I
(08:13):
mean, and this is I mean, thisis something that we all talk
about.
Right, if it doesn't align withyour beliefs, don't do it.
But that's such an interestingperspective shift.
If something doesn't align withyour beliefs, how do you make it
align with your beliefs?
Like, so, the Facebook group.
So here's the backstory y'all.
I woke up one morning and I hadan invitation from Natalie
(08:35):
Bullen to join her Facebookcommunity and I was like Natalie
doesn't usually.
I mean, in fact, the week prior, natalie had emailed or sent me
a message to tell me that thegroup that I had opened for my
summit was spamming people on adaily basis with invites.
And that's a Facebook glitch,because everybody knows that's
not something I do not pitch,slap in the DMs or at all.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
Which is why I reached out to you, because most
people who have been doing thatI had been unfriending and
blocking, but because it was you, I said this doesn't seem right
, this doesn't seem like her andmaybe there actually is
something going on.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
And there was, and that's why.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
I was like, hey, do you know about this?
And you're like uh, never, no.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
So I ended up closing that group and then going back
and opening another one andmaking sure that the settings
aligned with.
You know, do not, please, donot, spam people invitations.
So anyway, it was aninconvenience but it aligns with
what I do.
That's what I did.
So I wake up one morning to mysurprise there's an invitation
for a Facebook group fromNatalie Bullen.
I did not even think twice.
I'm like, yeah, of course I'lljoin it.
And I learned later on that wasnever your intention.
(09:39):
Like you did not want to havethis group.
Like you woke up one morningand basically there were like
thousands of people in thisgroup.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Oh, it was a horrible because I I was in a group
program run by a tyrant who wedon't talk about because she's
litigious, and I got kicked out.
And in that particular programthey lump people by revenue
level and these particular womenwho were in that group were
people I was mentoring for free.
They were at the lowest revenuelevel of the people in this
(10:07):
particular program.
So these were not prospects.
Most of them did not even makethe kind of revenue or run the
kind of business where theywould qualify or even need my
services.
But I knew that they weren'tgoing to get support from that
group where the tyrant wasrunning it.
So, at the goodness of my heart, I became an admin in this
particular group of people andunfortunately, because Facebook
(10:28):
deprioritizes groups, over timeyou stop getting reach.
So even though I would go liveand ask them how they were doing
and try to check in, nobodywould respond back.
And over time you just kind offorget about it because if they
don't respond, I don't show up,they don't see the posts posts I
mean.
So there was proprietaryinformation from the main group
in that channel.
(10:49):
There were about 150 women Iwas mentoring, there were two
other admins and this is thegroup that facebook decides to
send thousands of invites to inthe middle of the night.
Now I have a facebook groupcalled nat'ss it's all the
people who've ever paid mebefore.
Why the fuck couldn't it haveblew up that group?
That would have been theperfect group to fill full of
(11:13):
people, because that group wasalready a promotional group
where I would go to say, hey,your favorite coach is back and
I have an offer.
If you want to get back in thesaddle again with UW, here's how
you can pay me offer.
If you want to get back in thesaddle again with UW, here's how
you can pay me.
I'm not to brag, but imaginehaving the kind of clout where
you can literally put all ofyour buyers in a group and say,
hey, group of buyers, here'sthat thing I'm selling now.
(11:33):
And they'd be like, oh, I can'twait to buy it.
Why would you not fill up thatgroup?
Why would that not be the group?
It's just a lot.
And so, yeah, I woke up to it.
But I wouldn't even say thatmaking the offer fit your
beliefs, because you can't shiftyour belief system like that.
You'll tear your nervous systemup.
Trying to do that, I think abigger thing for me is where am
I going?
So there's a version of youthat makes sense for what you
(11:58):
have now.
If you're middle class, if youpay yourself 50K a year from
your business, there's a versionof you that allows that to
happen.
That version is OK with yourlevel of debt.
That version is OK with thenumber of hours.
That version accepts that youmight need to buy generic paper
towels or that you might need todo your own hair dye.
(12:19):
There's a version of you thataligns with your socioeconomic
status, with the business thatyou have, with the spouse that
you have, with the friends thatyou have.
But if you're like me and yousee your future as vastly
different than your present, theversion of you right now can't
go with you into that new place.
(12:40):
The version of Natalie that isa billionaire that owns part of
an NBA team or part of an NFLteam, that has 200 doors of real
estate and millions of dollarsof stock that person and this
person you're talking to cannotcoexist.
This version of Natalie has todie.
(13:01):
That's the part that peopledon't get.
They cling on to who they arenow and they build offers for
where they are now and they hirefor who they are now and they
invest for who they are now.
Well, all that does is get youmore of what you are now.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
What you already have yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
That's it.
You're just optimizing what youhave and most of us are working
on our growth systems, not ourwealth systems.
For instance, let's say Idecide that I want to be a
multimillionaire and that I wantto invest in some hedge fund.
Well, maybe step one isbecoming an accredited investor.
Like, maybe I should do someresearch.
How do you invest in a hedgefund?
(13:40):
And then you look and you go,oh, you got to be really rich.
How rich do you have to beAccredited investor?
How do you become an accreditedinvestor?
200,000 personal income, 300,000household income, blah, blah,
blah.
I'm an accredited investorbecause I hold securities
licenses.
So I kind of got to leapfrogthe income requirement.
But even if I didn't, if I wasreading it as a lay person 200K.
(14:02):
So then you're like, how do Ipay myself 200K?
Huh, I guess my business needsto do 600, 700, 800k.
Maybe you need to ask yourbookkeeper, maybe you ask your
accountant.
Maybe you realize I have nofinancial management and I need
to start hiring someone to helpme with my money.
So then you go online and go,hey, who's a good bookkeeper?
(14:23):
What's the difference between abookkeeper and a CFO?
And then you hire this personand you say how much do I need
to make revenue to pay myself200,000 so I can be an
accredited investor and startgetting in bed with some of
these deals?
And they might say well, youonly pay yourself 50K a year and
your business makes like 300.
You probably could pay yourself75.
And then maybe, if yourbusiness did 700,000, you could
(14:47):
pay yourself 200.
So then it becomes how do wemake 700,000?
So then you need to assess whatare the price points, how many
leads.
You see how this is logical.
But it starts from the beliefthat I'm already that rich ass
person.
Yeah, I believe that all I'mdestined for is this my brain is
not going to take me down theline of thought that I just
(15:08):
walked you through.
That's the issue that mostpeople have.
They say I want to learn how toinvest and they say that shit.
Every year I make a post.
It's on autopilot every year.
What do you wish you knew aboutmoney?
The number one answer is alwaysinvest in the stock market and
Pete.
The same people say that everyyear.
Why don't those people everhire a financial planner?
(15:28):
This is a real question.
Like you can get a financialplan for between one and $3,000.
These are people who are goingon trips, buying cars, buying
shoes, buying clothes, gettingtax refunds.
Maybe You're telling me they'venever had $3,000 to be able to
get a financial plan, or even afew hundred to meet with a
financial planner one time, oreven go down to the bank and
talk to a financial advisor orask chat.
(15:50):
There's nothing they could doEvery year?
The only answer is I want tolearn how to invest.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
Go on Google.
I don't understand how we havesuch a wealth of information at
our fingertips and yet so manypeople do not take advantage of
that.
I mean, if nothing else, theydon't have the belief they don't
have the belief.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
The belief is the issue, it's not the information.
This is why I also warnentrepreneurs against trying to
position information as the Holygrail.
You're going to buy my programand you're going to get informed
.
Information does nothing.
People have to believe thatthat information will work for
them.
In order for you to beconfident enough to open a
(16:30):
brokerage account and execute atrade, you have to have a belief
that what you do works for thegreater good, that, even if you
don't really know how the stockmarket works, that it's better
for you to get involved and trythan for you to do nothing.
Yeah, you got to have a strongtry than for you to do nothing.
Yeah, you got to have a strongbelief system, and most of us do
not.
We've never been taught how tobe more resilient.
(16:51):
A lot of people only feel goodabout themselves when good
things happen to them.
They only feel good aboutthemselves when they're flush
with cash.
Most people have their networth and their self-worth fused
together like Siamese twins,yeah, so when something bad
happens, they feel like badpeople.
They conflate that thing.
So you're not going to try newstuff if your identity is
(17:13):
attached to winning, if you feellike a failure.
When something doesn't go well,then why would you ever try
anything new?
I don't think everything Itouch will work, but I think
that enough will work for me tokeep going Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I want to talk about the identity piece a little bit,
because you mentioned somethingbefore we started recording.
We were talking about howNatalie paid me the absolute
mother of all compliments andsaid that I'm one of her
favorite people on the internet,which you know.
I take that to heart becausethe fact of the matter is and
you all know this if you've beenfollowing me for a while a lot
of people do not like me.
A lot of people do not like howI show up.
I constantly have mindsetcoaches that I did not give any
(17:51):
sort of permission to connectwith me about telling me that my
mindset is suffering, that I'ma negative person, that you're
never going to have clientsbecause you're constantly
tearing people down.
I've had so many shade postswritten about posts that I've
written like it's absolutelybananas.
So, when somebody says this tome, it means a lot.
And then we joked about thefact that people hate us.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
And I I'm not joking, no no, no, we're not.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Let the guests be clear.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Natalie is not joking .
Speaker 1 (18:23):
But I want to talk about that because I think that
this is really important,because it speaks to identity.
It speaks to, like you alsomentioned, about you know,
having built this clout that youcan just drop into a group of
people that you've collected andsay, here's the thing, and
people will buy it.
There are so many peoplechasing virality and calling
themselves fucking thoughtleaders and all of this, all of
(18:43):
this nonsense.
First of all, what did you doto build this, this clout, this
credibility?
I mean, I think I know theanswer, but I'd like people to
hear it from you.
And why is it actually kind ofa good thing for people not to
like you?
Speaker 2 (18:59):
because that's scary for people.
I don't know why.
I don't know why.
I don't know why my mother toldme that I would not be liked
because I was smarter thanpeople.
My mom told me that my teacherswouldn't like me because I
would be smarter than them.
That's what my mom sent me tokindergarten with Five.
She put me in public school anddeferred not behave, not take
(19:21):
your nap.
My mom taught me that peoplewon't like you because they are
jealous of you.
Adults will be jealous of yourintellect.
Imagine sitting in afive-year-old school with
something like that.
So like I just got to giveAnnie Fleming all the credit.
I just got to give my mom acredit for like, putting that
out there for me.
And, sure enough, my firstgrade teacher was very
(19:42):
intimidated by me.
It was a whole thing.
So she gave me that adviceright in time.
My mom is super churchy, mymom's very religious.
My mom loves God.
Don't say nothing about big Godover there with Annie.
Annie, don't play that right.
But she told me that theycrucified Jesus, as if to say if
Jesus ain't good enough forpeople, certainly you won't be.
(20:02):
So that's how I grew up.
I grew up knowing if they ain'tlike Jesus, they not going to
like me.
They live.
Jesus came to save your souland you hung him on a cross by
his, by his hands with somenails.
I don't think anyone isuniversally liked.
I don't like Beyonce I'm sureI'm one of the only people in
the world that can say that buteverybody don't like everything.
(20:24):
That's just.
It's not going to work that way.
Being universally liked isimpossible, just like perfection
is impossible.
And so I have a lot of ego.
I actually don't like toattempt things that aren't
possible.
I don't mind attempting thingsthat are difficult, but I don't
want to attempt anything that isimpossible, and it is
impossible to please everybody.
(20:46):
That is not real.
So that's not something thatI'm going to invest any of my
time in.
I'm not going to invest evenone minute of my day trying to
be liked by everyone.
I think that a lot of times wefocus on what we don't want.
You know, my stepfather was anEMT.
He's still with us, he just isretired.
Want.
(21:06):
You know, my stepfather was anEMT.
He's still with us, he just isretired.
And when I started driving, heasked me what do you think is
the most dangerous place at thescene of an accident?
I said being in the accident,being one of the two or three
cars that was involved in theaccident, and he said, no, the
most dangerous place to be ispassing the accident.
I said, well, that doesn't makeany sense.
They're in the ditch, theymight be dead.
(21:27):
I'm driving by it.
How could I be in more dangerthan them?
He said because peoplerubberneck when the accident's
off in the ditch.
You take your eyes off the roadand look in the ditch and guess
what happens when you focus onthe ditch, you end up in the
ditch right with them.
Guess what happens when youfocus on the ditch you end up in
the ditch right with them, andthe person who rubbernecks is
(21:48):
more likely to die at the scenethan the people in the original
wreck.
So a lot of us spend a lot oftime focusing on what we don't
want.
We don't want people to dislikeus, we don't want this post to
not get likes, we don't wantpeople to not pay us.
So we're so focused on thenegative outcome that we're
trying to avoid we don'trecognize.
(22:08):
You're putting focus.
Avoiding something takes focus.
It takes focus to avoid anoutcome.
You have to be activelythinking about that outcome over
there to not fall into it,correct it, correct.
So what we don't recognize iswhen you wake up in the morning
and go no-transcript.
(22:31):
Wake up and say I want to bewealthy, focus on the wealth,
don't focus on not being broke.
So when you focus on not beingdisliked, you lose power,
because now the people you couldhave impacted, who could have
liked, you, could have loved youdon't even know you exist
because you spend all your timetrying to water down your
(22:51):
message to not be disliked.
I spend so much time on the goodshit I don't have time for
anything else.
I have a paid community now.
I have private clients.
I have a live event in the fallwhich I don't know why everyone
is not going to be at.
Frankly, I have a merchandisestore now, which is new for me.
I'm writing a book.
(23:11):
We're launching the publicpodcast.
We're launching a paidnewsletter.
I'm really excited about thatbook.
We're launching the publicpodcast.
We're launching a paidnewsletter.
I'm really excited about thatone.
We're pulling content down offFacebook and kind of moving and
diversifying.
In short, I have so muchsuccess to focus on.
Yeah, I don't have time for lowlevel thoughts like what if
(23:35):
someone doesn't like me?
Like that just can't meet.
Imagine having a meeting withyourself and the purpose of the
meeting is people not liking you.
That's essentially what you'redoing when you focus on things
like that.
I just met with my projectmanager today.
We talked about my website.
We talked about the live event.
We talked about onboarding formy new program.
We talked about the circlecommunity.
We talked about my email.
We talked about the circlecommunity, we talked about my
(23:55):
email.
We talked about some of ouroutstanding projects and we ran
late.
That's why I was late heretoday.
We had so much to talk aboutand, frankly, I probably, after
this call, need to get back onthe phone with her and finish
the meeting, because we probablygot another hour worth of stuff
important stuff that moves theneedle for UW to talk about.
I just can't imagine spendingeven one minute of that meeting
(24:21):
going.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
How do we get people to like us?
Speaker 2 (24:22):
what if it doesn't work?
What if people don't buy it?
What if it's not the rightprice?
What if?
None of that is important.
The only thing that's importantis my mission getting fulfilled
, putting more money in thehands of good people who run
ethical businesses.
That's why God put me here toeradicate poverty and middle
(24:45):
classness for women, especiallywomen of color, especially black
women.
So how could somebody'sexternal validation be more
important than my mission?
How could somebody's externalvalidation be more important
than my mission?
How could somebody's opinionabout me matter to any degree?
I just feel like people notinvolved with their mission
enough.
I just feel like people not inlove enough with their craft.
(25:08):
I think people just not selfishenough, because I'm just too
damn selfish, thinking aboutwhat I came here to do, to be
worried about what you thinkabout what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
When did your mission become clear to you?
Like, when did that?
When did that belief kind ofform in you that this is why I
was put on this earth?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Cause I can hear the conviction you know, I was
probably seven or eight WheneverI read the census.
So I was probably seven oreight and read the census that
came out and that census saidthat black people were the
poorest race in the UnitedStates.
Every census since then hassaid the same thing.
They might as well call it theconsensus, because we are
consistently at the bottom.
(25:45):
And I asked my mom, why areblack people poor?
And she said who told you that?
And I said well, it's in thiscensus.
It says that we make less moneythan everybody else.
And I don't understand that,mommy, because you work and
daddy works and we don't seempoor.
And I decided that before I die,somehow the statistics about
(26:08):
black people were going to bedifferent than when I was born.
I haven't fully figured all ofit out yet, but I'm going to do
100 people's worth of work inthis space.
Most people die and they'vedone zero people's worth of work
towards their mission.
They say they care about thesemissions, but a lot of times
when you meet people and say,well, what are you actually
(26:28):
doing to give back to this causethat you say, that you love so
dearly, they're not reallytaking a lot of action.
They love thoughts and prayersand stuff.
Yeah, I want to do a hundredpeople's worth of work in the
missions that I have.
Like.
This is the groundwork gettingmyself really financially
realized and being amultimillionaire.
That's, that's pillar one.
And pillar two is giving backmicro grants, mentorship,
(26:52):
launching the nonprofit.
And then three is thephilanthropy.
You know, my father spent manyyears homeless.
He's a Vietnam vet.
He had some substance abuseissues and the US government
threw him away and I don't likethat.
So I really want to have, youknow, buses that go around and
do like mobile clothes washing,mobile haircuts.
I want to have an initiative tohelp people get their driver's
(27:14):
licenses back, get theiridentification back, so they can
get jobs.
If they want to get jobs, havetiny home communities.
That's big vision because Ihave the capacity.
If you are gifted, if you aresmarter than average, prove it.
Smart people like to prove thatthey're smart.
They like to write books andthey like to talk real talk and
they like to use, you know, TIlevel words.
(27:36):
They want to sound like athesaurus.
Prove it in your action.
If you really are smarter thanother people, then you should
bear more fruit.
So I feel like the fruit at theend of my life will tell just
how smart I actually was.
Was I smart or was I just egodriven?
And there is a difference.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
There's a huge difference.
I think a lot of people, I meanyou, say, get clear.
And I don't think a lot ofpeople have a mission.
I don't think I think they havea lot of.
It'd be nice if, but they don'thave a clear cut mission of
like no, this is the change,this is the change I want to see
.
No, you absolutely do.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
I don't care what, in the short term, the things that
we complain about.
This person didn't make good ontheir payment plan.
This live event didn't sell asmany tickets as we wanted.
In the grand scheme of things,none of that really matters.
What matters is continuing todo the thing and putting
yourself out there.
(28:28):
You can accelerate any goal ifyou're willing to do the
uncomfortable change.
And experts in particularparticular, they have these
fancy frameworks and systems andvenn diagrams have trademarked
all of it.
You know what I'm talking about.
How often do you install yoursystem on your own self?
I do that on myself all thetime, yeah, yeah, so that I know
(28:50):
where my upper limit is and Iknow where my, my belief is.
I know where my growth edge is.
All the time it's like um, thenew jumanji movie, um, yeah, and
like they only got the nextstep.
So they didn't see the wholemap, they only saw the, the
obstacle they were up against atthat time a lot of people
trying to wait to get a wholemap and see what's all coming.
(29:11):
You, you just got to take onestep, yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Just that's all you can take?
You can't, you cannot plan for20 steps down the road, but
that's what people try to do.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
That's why people who've never made a sale hire
eight figure coaches.
Tell you how many people havegotten in my DMs trying to run
masterclasses and webinars andrun ads when they've never
served even one private client?
Why are you working with thiscoach who has these very
advanced systems that require ahuge audience, a huge marketing
(29:43):
budget, 10 team members, and youknow you have none of that.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
people want to skip all the steps and there's
because they don't want to dothe uncomfortable work of having
to, like you said, shift theirbelief in their identity.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Nobody does, nobody does.
No one wants to douncomfortable work, but the ones
who are making a difference arethe ones who are doing it.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
They suck it up and they do it Right Agreed.
I think that's the bigdifference that people don't
understand.
They hear people like youtalking.
They hear people like youtalking and they're like well,
you know what, I can just copywhat they do, or I can jump on
the bandwagon or jump on thecoattails of this person or that
person, but they're not sittingdown and understanding like you
(30:24):
have to have a purpose.
Your purpose cannot be dictatedby somebody else and you have
to be so laser focused on thatpurpose that everything else is
irrelevant.
But there are not enough peoplewho are that convicted in
anything, let alone business, orpurpose or mission.
They're just not convictedenough.
They want the bare minimumbecause it keeps them
(30:46):
comfortable, but then they alsowant the privilege of
complaining about the fact thatthat's all they have.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
I don't get that.
I mean you're right.
I just I don don't know.
I don't think you can shortcutthe work.
No, that's my belief system.
So because that's my beliefsystem, I don't really try to
shortcut the work.
I also need my beliefs to berooted.
In fact, I've never met asuccessful person who has
sidestepped doing all the work.
So I actually don't believeit's possible and my lived
(31:12):
experience continues toreinforce that it's not possible
.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
So well, that's why I don't like language around
short cutting and collapsingtimelines and things like that,
because I think it gives a falseimpression of what is possible.
Right, I just, I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I think there's a level where that makes sense,
like right now having servedover a thousand clients, having
had 12 launches coming in on,we're closing in on 1.5 million
cumulative revenue.
Cumulative, that was not oneyear.
I'm not a seven-figure businessowner.
Let's not lie on the internetPeople like to lie has to be an
(31:50):
all-in-one year for you to beable to say that.
Has to be one year, one fiscalyear or one calendar year, you
pick.
But now if people say I couldgive you a shortcut, it's not
completely a lie because I haveenough data for a statistician
type person to be able to saywell, actually, natalie, you
don't need five steps to sellthis.
(32:12):
You've already sold it eighttimes and you've proven that
really, this step and this stepwere the ones that kind of moved
the needle.
So maybe you don't need fivesteps to sell this.
You've already sold it eighttimes and you've proven that
really, this step and this stepwere the ones that kind of moved
the needle.
So maybe you don't need thatmaster class.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
That's not a shortcut though.
That's clarity.
That's like a clear and directpath.
That's not shortcut.
Shortcut is like you don't haveto do these things because you
don't like them you have to.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
You have to at least once, twice, three or four times
if, because you have to havedata, and that's what's so
interesting.
Let me put it this way ifyou're not gonna have data, then
just go full woo and admit that.
You just do shit from your gutand you just figure it out as
you go along.
But you can't do both.
It's the lie about both thatbothers me the most.
It's the well.
(32:50):
I kind of trust my gut when Idon't have data.
Now you see why I refuse to bea business coach anymore.
My private coaching is moving towealth, identity and authority.
Only.
Only you have to have alreadymade money.
You have to already be sellingsomething.
Your marketing and systems aredialed in.
You don't need me to help youwith ops or calendars or
anything.
You need to become the type ofperson who makes the
(33:14):
uncomfortable change to growyour business period.
That's what my private coachingis going to be, because sales
coaching attracts people whohave no sales and business
coaching attracts people with nobusiness.
Now, that's not an absolute.
There are business coaches whoserve real people, but they
don't flock to me.
Let me tell you, I get thewant-a-preneurs who are, who are
just like, hey, I've never soldanything at all.
(33:36):
Can you help me?
Or like asking questions thatare really strange, like I'll
have people say what should thetitle of my workshop be, and
they'll give me four titles thatare unrelated to each other.
So it's not like a semantics,it's like the topic, and I'm
like I don't know what's theoutcome of the programming,
because the title needs tocorrelate to the programming.
(33:59):
Well, I don't know, I haven'tset up the programming yet.
Uh, okay, well, what is theupsell?
Like, what is when they come tothe master class, you're gonna
sell them something.
What is that?
Well, I don't know.
I'm kind of working throughthat too.
Then why are we starting at thetitle?
Like it's the complete wrongthing to try to pick, you don't?
I'm writing a book.
It has kind of a working gist,but the title of this book is
(34:22):
not going to be revealed untilthe book is written.
Yeah, when the book is writtenas a whole and it is edited for
clarity and we read it front toend, then certain names will be
this could work and certainnames will be absolutely not
because of the content.
Why would you start with thename?
It's just like people withthose stupid acronyms they call
(34:42):
frameworks.
They'll be like a money person,so they want the framework to
be the wealth frameworkw-e-a-l-t-h.
So they try to put some likecomplicated shit together, the
like working everything alltogether, lima, tango, hero
method, like they try to makethe acronym work and you could
(35:03):
tell they started with theacronym and tried to shoehorn
the thing.
But it's the method.
The method is more importantthan the acronym and you could
tell.
That's why I don't listen tonikki minaj anymore.
You can hear her set up herpunch line three lines early
because she will say somethingthat doesn't make any sense.
You can tell she's trying towork into tyrant because she's
(35:24):
saying crazy stuff like hydrant,vibrant.
Look at my hair is pink, isvibrant, I squirt like a hydrant
.
You're a tyrant.
And it's like girl.
We saw that coming like fourlines ago because you've been
saying really weird shit at theend of every line for like two
(35:44):
stanzas.
We get it.
You could tell when people weretrying to back into something.
You actually don't have to dothat.
Your, your, your frameworkdoesn't have to be an acronym.
Yeah, it doesn't have to becute, buttoned up, polished
thing and I think people get sostuck on that that they lose
sight of the fact that this issupposed to be helpful and
logical for the right person.
(36:06):
Yeah, not necessarily flashy orfancy.
You know, money coach, oh,here's my money method.
Oh dear, here we go.
What does the o stand for?
Opulence, occlusive operations.
Because that they wanted theword money.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Because they felt like the marketing is always the
focus.
The marketing has always beenthe focus.
There are too many businessowners who are actually just
marketing.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
They're trying to be marketers yeah, it's trash I'm a
terrible marketer man.
I don't care what anybody says,I tell the truth too much.
I just want to tell the truth.
Okay, and sales is more funthan marketing, anyway, in my
opinion.
I like to actually conversationgoing.
I like to actually collect themonies.
You know what I mean.
So for me, um, marketing Iwon't say it's a necessary evil
(36:53):
because that makes it soundunpleasant.
I actually really likemarketing my own stuff.
But to me, a great marketingkind of eliminates sales and
great product kind of eliminatesmarketing.
And if you don't believe me, askyourself how ChatGPT marketed
itself to you.
What ad did you see?
What did ChatGPT do to get you?
(37:14):
Nothing?
Other people sold you on usingchat gpt.
They went on facebook and theyraved about how great it was and
you downloaded it and yousigned up for it and you paid
for it.
That's what happened.
They did zero to market to youor sell to you, because they
didn't have to, because theproduct was great.
So if you make the product great, half of your job is already.
(37:36):
Cashmere club is a greatproduct.
I'm not going to beg people toget in it or stay in it, because
it already has a great valueproposition.
As a matter of fact, I thinkpeople are going to tell other
people about it.
I think that my job is going tobe done once I get this cohort.
I mean, obviously it'll existand we'll have to treat our
people well.
But if you have to, I tellpeople.
(37:57):
If marketing is a nightmare,like not, you don't know how to
market.
You know how to market andyou've spent the money and it's
still hard.
The product probably needs help.
And see people get so involvedin this is my baby, this is my
project, this is my this andthat, and they're so ego driven
they build stuff that has nodemand.
That's the thing I'll neverunderstand as long as I live.
(38:18):
Like we don't have time today,but I'll never understand the
Natalie.
No one wants this, no one askedfor this, but I built it anyway
.
That is so confusing.
If you don't have 10 or 15people who are willing to buy
something, why did you make it?
But then they blame.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
It's a sales problem.
It's a marketing problem.
It's a positioning problem.
It's a mess.
It's none of that.
Your product is shit.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
Nobody wants it like it has to solve a problem that
people want solved, like I had aclient send me these beautiful
flowers for my four-yearbusiness anniversary and maybe
there is a product that iscalled a pedal keeper and it
could be a little skirt thatgoes around this potted plant
that catches the pedals and andsweeps them into the trash can
(39:02):
for me.
But I don't get flowers enoughto buy something whose sole
purpose is to sweep pedals offof this desk.
I would rather just throw thewhole arrangement away
eventually because they areflowers.
Maybe I will take one rose andI will press it so I can keep it
in a book, but the rest I willhappily throw away.
So maybe it solves a problem,but is it a big enough problem?
(39:24):
Is it a common enough problem?
Is it an irritating enoughproblem for a person to pay to
fix it?
And the answer to that isusually no.
It's also how people end up inmodels that they hate.
It's why I don't have atraditional membership.
I had somebody DM me.
You know one of the people whohates me.
I told you people hate me.
I thought you would never, everhave a community.
(39:47):
You're a hypocrite.
You talk about low ticketmemberships and here you go,
launching a low ticketmembership and I'm like well,
first of all, a low ticketmembership is $7 a month or $27
a month or maybe even $97 amonth.
I'm making all my peoplecommitted to a year up front, so
I don't know how that could beconflated with a low ticket
membership.
Two, I'm selling it to affluentpersons.
(40:07):
I don't know very manymemberships that are purposely
doing that, that are turningpeople down because of an income
level.
Most of the memberships that Iget targeted will take anybody
with a pulse and a paypal.
Yeah right, um.
And three, if you don't fightchurn, you don't have a
membership, because churn is thebig issue is that people can
come and go meet people onnational average stay in
(40:29):
memberships three months.
So even if you make them committo a quarter, that's the only
quarter you're going to get.
So it's important for you torecognize that people will harp
on what they want to harp on.
Now, this person is probably areally good person and they
probably have a husband andmaybe even a child, and they
probably run a business that Ihope has a mission, vision and
value and it might even havesome OK marketing.
(40:51):
But instead of spending timemeeting with their team,
investing in the stock market,getting on the treadmill, eating
a nutritious meal, gettingextra sleep, having sex with
their partner, organizing theirasana, putting up a new job ad,
hiring a business coach, goingto therapy.
They decided to spend 10minutes messaging me about
(41:14):
something I said I didn't wantto do six months ago in a post.
I forgot that I wrote yeah,it's not that people can't be
successful is that they don't dothe work that it takes to be
successful.
They are so focused on whatother people have and what other
people do.
I told you earlier I'm anon-crazy Kanye.
I am laser focused on me.
(41:36):
I don't have a lot of time tofocus on other people in general
.
It's just not my vibe.
I like me, I love me.
I think me is great.
So as long as those things aretrue, then that's where I'm
going to put my focus, and so Ipray for people who are like
that, because they never will besuccessful.
(41:56):
They don't have time because ifthey're messaging me stupid
crap like that, they'remessaging other people's stupid
crap like that.
These are the people who wantto go back and forth with you on
your posts and they want to beargumentative.
Go find some business.
I actually have a lot ofclients.
People think I'm around onsocial media all the time.
I haven't been on Facebook day.
I probably won't be a meetingwith one of my mentees.
I'm going to be promoting aspeaking engagement.
(42:18):
I need to do some recordingsfor a course and I need to
prepare for my calls tomorrow.
You know my husband's going tobe back in a few hours.
I like to greet him at the door.
I like to make sure he haslunch.
So I really, really really willnot have time to argue with
people about the super bowl to.
I just won't have time and so,like when I, when people do
(42:42):
stuff like that, I just I'm likepoor little ting ting.
They can't be making any money.
They have so much timeavailable to them to do things
that have no meaning and won'tshift their life in any way.
If you've ever met me, you knowthat you're not going to
convince me to do anything.
That wasn't my idea.
So it's a complete waste oftime and it also makes you
(43:05):
wonder.
You know it's part of why I'mmoving.
I won't say I'm leaving socialmedia, but I'm moving away from
it.
It's the pair of socialrelationships.
People actually think that theyknow me.
They think that their opinionmatters.
They slide my DMs.
I know you said this and I knowyou said that and I know you
said who are you?
That's always my first thing.
Who are you?
Right, content isn't coachingJust because you read my post.
(43:27):
That is not equivalent to youknow me or I like you or I want
to hear from you.
Me making a post online is youknow and so like.
That's part of my inner workI've done on myself.
Where am I still overgiving andwhere am I still trying to
showcase my value and worth andwhere am I still performing like
(43:49):
a scrappy entrepreneur that'sbrand new and has to crank out
content to get clients?
And how can I move intoshowcasing my methodology and my
systems to be able to call inthe best client Because I can
make money.
Making money has never been myproblem.
Most entrepreneurs, theirproblem is making money.
(44:10):
That's the whole problem.
Their business does not makethe money that they want it to
make and that's the struggle andit's always been the struggle.
If that's not your struggle, youstart to find that you have a
lot of time to do something else, cause eventually you're, like
you get a little bored, you knowso, like for me, it's always
making sure that I have achallenge but that I'm not
burning myself out.
So my brain is always teeteringon that edge.
(44:31):
It just can't.
I just I don't even rememberwhat people post.
When people DM me and go, hey,did you like my post?
Or I saw that you liked my postI don't even know what posts
they're talking about.
Like I'm so laser focused on meI barely even read other
people's stuff.
Like I know that sounds soconceited, but I'm trying to
hone my craft, I'm trying to getbetter at this content thing so
(44:52):
I can write less content.
You know people ask Natalie,why do you post seven times a
day?
I was lazy and I was shit atwriting content.
I'm just going to be honest andI knew if I wrote seven posts a
day, at least one of them willbe great without me even having
to try.
So now trying to distill downto one or two posts is making me
have to be better at writing.
(45:17):
I can't just fill my timelinewith fluff and what I used to do
.
I used to be like let me justthink about this post.
Now it's like does thisshowcase my method?
Does this speak to my absolutebest buyer?
Does this funnel people tosomething other than my DMs,
because my DMs are crazy?
Or is this an auntie, nat, hey,this is what you need to do to
get your shit together type post?
Or is this a rah-rah, sis, boom, bah, get up and make some
sales posts, because thosearen't really the kind of posts
(45:40):
that are going to push mythought leadership to the next.
That just fills up my page withcrap to where my team can't
even find the post that I'mlooking for to put in my book.
The content mountain made my egofeel good, but it wasn't making
the impact I need, and itworked for the version of
Natalie that existed when shewrote it.
(46:00):
It just doesn't work for theversion that I am today the best
thing you can do as anentrepreneur, if you take one
thing from all of my ramblingtoday accept that you will be a
new version all the time.
Treat yourself like software.
Accept that you are softwareand that you will be a new
version all the time.
Treat yourself like software.
Except that you are softwareand that you will be going
through iteration and that everynew version overrides the old
(46:22):
one.
Yeah, it has to.
You can't keep them all.
A lot of us want to keep allthe old versions.
If you're elder, millennial,you've probably got a box with
every Apple product you've everbought.
Every iPhone you buy, you keepthe box.
I know y'all got the boxes.
Don't lie, say you don't havethem.
Override, override, right, likeit has to erase and replace the
(46:45):
old version.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Listen, I'm a Gen X, I don't keep no boxes and I
immediately get rid of everydevice, I know, but the
millennials are like damn it,she taught me.
I do have 20 Apple boxes in myhouse and they're all empty and
I haven't had the device forlike six years.
Yeah, I know, Exactly right.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
I have the box for the TV that I bought when I was
in college.
Because I still have that TV.
It's like 15 years old.
It has the receipt taped to it.
I bought it Black Friday inperson.
Remember when we used to doin-person.
Speaker 1 (47:15):
Black Friday shopping , lining up at three in the
morning.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
Yep, yes, I was at Walmart at four in the morning.
Thanking God I didn't gettrampled.
That was me.
I was at the back of the pack,though, because I was fat and I
already knew, if it came down toany kind of physical
altercation, that I was justgonna lose.
I have like ridiculous pointyacrylic nails like I could like
scratch you, but that's aboutthe athletiest I'm gonna get
(47:40):
like I'm not really.
Yeah, I'm not.
I'm not like I'm strong, butI'm not athletic, and there's
definitely a difference.
Like athletic requires agilityor coordination or hand-eye
something.
Yeah, I've got none of that.
I can kick you really hard.
That that I can do so like youhave to know your strengths, but
that that's the thing.
(48:00):
And like, when I meet peopleand they're like Natalie, I
didn't have a mom like you did.
What can I do?
And I'm like then, be my mom.
They're like what do you mean?
Be my mom?
My mom was in constant,unwavering source of positive
energy.
Be that for yourself.
Don't speak anything negativeto yourself ever.
My mom doesn't.
(48:21):
If I call my mom right now andI pick, if I call my mom on this
podcast, my mom hey sweetie,hey honey, how is your day?
I'm doing well, mom, how areyou and she's going to start
talking about God and she'sgoing to talk about her day.
And if I go, mom, I'm down.
You shouldn't be down.
You're a child of the most highGod.
What's wrong?
(48:43):
Like my mom has never insultedme, she has never called me out
of my name, she's never calledme stupid or dumb or ignorant,
even when, even when I sinned,even when she was frustrated,
even when she was mad, even whenshe found out I was drinking or
out partying or having sex.
Like never, ever, have I gottena cross word from my mother.
So I get it.
Maybe your mom's not like that,then maybe you need to be your
mom.
Like, get in programs likepositive intelligence that help
(49:05):
you rewire your belief system,that negative track in your
brain.
Like anytime, like journal,anytime you start thinking man,
I'm a piece of shit, man, I'mnot worth anything.
Man, I, I can't do this Journalthat I feel like a piece.
Like, write it down and then,like, talk to your therapist
about, like, who put thosethings in your mind, because you
didn't do it.
That's someone else's voice,it's your parents, or the
(49:27):
bullies, or your ex-husband.
You decide, you decide.
Okay, I didn't have an AnnieFleming as a mom, but I can
still have that voice in my headbecause I choose to.
You know what I'm saying.
Like, I just I'm not saying Idon't have privilege, but
sometimes you can manufactureprivilege.
(49:48):
Sometimes you can make your ownsituation better.
Jay-z is a billionaire marriedto arguably one of the most
attractive women.
I might not like Beyonce'smusic, but she's hot.
Let's be for real.
She looks great and she'salways looked great.
She's been hot 20 years.
So Jay-Z was born into projects.
I can't say I've really evenlike been to the projects.
(50:10):
Definitely not like big cityprojects.
No, I've never been to thelevel of projects that he grew
up in new york, absolutely notlike the projects in alabama are
not, because we don't have thegang violence.
So like no, I've never in myformative years.
He was poor.
He had to sell drugs.
You could argue that I live avery privileged lifestyle
compared to sean carter.
(50:31):
How was he a billionaire?
Because at some point hedecided that his identity as a
kid in the project selling drugsto help his parent wasn't
really the person he was.
He realized this is the thingI'm doing.
This is not the person I am.
So then he decided because I ama mogul, I'm going to start
(50:51):
behaving like a mogul instead ofbehaving like a kid who lives
in the projects.
And it wasn't overnight, butlike it happened.
So we all have some amount ofprivilege.
Maybe we don't realize it.
Some of us have prettyprivilege.
Some of us have parents whowent to college.
Some of us have never been poor.
If you're only, if you've onlyever been middle class, you
(51:12):
actually have privilege.
If you've only ever been middleclass, you actually have
privilege.
Yeah, if you've never missed ameal, you actually have
privilege.
So, like, use it, use yourprivilege.
Like, yeah, use whatever you'vegot to get what you want.
I'm.
I have higher than averageintellect.
I am privileged.
Why would I downplay.
Why would I be like well, it'snot fair for me to be smart
because everyone can't be smart,so let me not use my smarts.
(51:34):
How would that sound Like?
Why wouldn't you use the giftyou need to go use your talent
or you will lose your talent.
So I've never liked the ideathat Natalie doesn't have to
work for it.
Natalie was just born withthese perfect genes and these
perfect parents and that's whyshe can do stuff that I can't do
.
It's like that's, that's a,that's a cop-out man.
(51:55):
Yeah, that's a cop-out.
I wasn't.
I wasn't great.
I was a villain.
Early y'all are getting likeafter therapy, natalie, like
y'all are getting a Natalieworth knowing.
I was a mean child okay, I was.
I was a snarky oh my God.
And in college I wasintolerable.
(52:17):
I am a person worth knowing.
Now, I was not always.
So I think it's easy for us totell ourselves someone else is
better equipped to do the thing,but God wouldn't have put the
idea in your head if you weren'tqualified to execute it.
Speaker 1 (52:33):
It's letting yourself off the hook, and I really, I
love what you're saying, becausewhat came to mind as I was
listening to you was be theperson you deserve to be Right.
Be the person you deserve to be.
Speaker 2 (52:43):
I deserve to be rich and fulfilled and satisfied and
happy.
And so if I'm not that personright now, then like I need to
do everything I can to get there.
I think sometimes we're waitingon external things.
I think the only way I'm goingto have the life I want to have
and that's if I fight tooth andnail is to decide the kind of
(53:04):
life I'm going to have and takeactions every single day towards
that life.
That's the only way.
But waiting on people to likeme, waiting on me to lose weight
, waiting on me to have moremoney, a better website, a
copywriter, a project manager, abetter scope and own franchise,
(53:25):
like if I'm waiting and waiting, that's going to be years from
now.
And what are you doing whileyou wait?
You got to stay ready so youdon't have to get ready.
Y'all not ready.
I've had people who could havegotten grants but they couldn't
pass the financial check becausethey didn't have their books up
to date.
I've had people that I wouldhave been able to get on stage
(53:45):
to get a $1,500 speaking fee,but they didn't have a keynote
speech or a media page or a.
They didn't have it.
They couldn't produce a speakerreel or any kind of proof.
These were people who weretelling me, natalie, I'm
actively looking to be a speaker.
I found a gig that was lookingfor speakers in their lane and I
knew the coordinator and handedtheir name over and they could
(54:08):
not come up with the documentsto prove they were actually a
speaker.
You got to stay ready, so youdon't have to get ready.
So all of that time that peoplespend hating me, hating you,
complaining about our content,complaining about why I didn't
approve their posts in myFacebook group that I never even
saw because I was serving myclients, all that time you spent
you could have been getting thethings you need to actually
(54:29):
move your business forward.
That time is the time that youcould have written the content
that you say you don't have timeto write, or the sales page
that still isn't up, or thespeaker reel.
They're like well, I've neverspoken professionally.
Make your own stage.
Why you think?
I have my own event every year?
Because I know I can make moreon my own stage than anybody
(54:50):
will pay me to be on theirs.
So, like if I die with nothing,I threw it all away.
I threw all of my privilege andinfluence.
I threw it all away.
Why?
Because I was worried aboutsomeone's opinion Because I was
worried about failure, because Iwas trying to be perfect.
Oh, those sound like terriblereasons to live beneath your
(55:12):
purpose.
That's heart-wrenching.
I could never imagine.
I could never imagine tellingsomebody my fear of your
unsolicited opinion as anunsuccessful person that I've
never met on the internet keptme from doing what God put me
here to do.
Speaker 1 (55:31):
Y'all, that's the mic drop.
You didn't know you needed.
Speaker 2 (55:34):
That would just be such a crazy thing, and I almost
want to tell people that thenext time somebody messages me
some BS I think that's exactlywhat I'm going to say.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
I think you should Imagine if everything that you
have said today was necessaryfor people to hear, and I want
to thank you for coming in andjust being your true, honest
self, because I do get a lot ofpeople who pitch the podcast,
(56:03):
who come on the podcast and Ican see you know they're trying
to say the things that they knowthat they can use as soundbites
later and that's totally fine.
Like you, come here, however,you need to come here, but,
honestly you, this was less apodcast appearance than it was a
sermon at church, so y'all justbeen taking church, that's what
(56:24):
we do.
Speaker 2 (56:25):
That's what people needed to hear Today.
Speaker 1 (56:26):
That is what people needed to hear, so thank you for
just thank you I appreciate youso very much.
Speaker 2 (56:32):
This was I got to get my thoughts out.
I Just thank you.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
I appreciate you so very much.
This was I got to get mythoughts out.
I appreciate you.
Okay, last thing Tell peoplewhere they can find you.
Where would you like people to?
Speaker 2 (56:39):
find you, they can go to my website,
unapologeticwealthcom, or theycan find me on Facebook.
I'm the only Natalie Bullen.
You'll see.
Sarah will put it down in theshow notes for you, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (56:55):
So okay, for this week we are adjusting that final
tagline.
Some of you can have successwithout the BS, but you all need
to come back to church nextweek.
Speaker 2 (56:59):
So I will talk to you .
Then Stop, if you can, bye.
Speaker 1 (57:07):
That's it for this week.
Thanks for listening to theBusiness Blasphemy Podcast.
We'll be back next week with anew episode, but in the meantime
, help a sister out bysubscribing and, if you're
feeling extra sassy rating thispodcast, and don't forget to
share the podcast with others.
Head over tobusinessblasphemypodcastcom to
connect with us and learn more.
Thanks for listening andremember you can have success
(57:27):
without the BS.
Welcome to the Business Blasphemy Podcast,
where we question the sacredtruths of the online business
space and the reverence withwhich they're held.
I'm your host, sarah Khanspeaker, strategic consultant
and BS busting badass.
Join me each week as wechallenge the norms, trends and
overall bullshit status quo ofentrepreneurship to uncover what
it really takes to build thebusiness that you want to build
(00:23):
in a way that honors you, yourlife and your vision for what's
possible, and maybe piss off afew gurus along the way.
So if you're ready to commitbusiness blasphemy, let's do it.
Hello, hello, blasphemers, youare in for a fucking treat, my
friends.
We have today Natalie Bullen,the one and only Nat Bullen.
(00:46):
She's here.
We're going to talk some shit,because you know that's what we
do, but I'm going to let herintroduce herself and then we're
going to dive right into it,because I already know she has a
ton to say.
So, nat, welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Hello, I am so excited.
This is going to be fun.
It's going to be fun.
Yes, I am a accidentalentrepreneur.
I own Unapologetic Wealth.
I'm a recovering sales coachand now I actually admit what I
really do for people, which ishelping them step into their
(01:18):
authority not just being anexpert, but being an authority
so that they can achieve thewealth that they want.
Truthfully, you want to be rich.
If you're listening to this,you want more money, you want
more time off, you want stocksor investments or bonds or to
travel the world.
You want something you don'tpresently have and you think
it's because you don't have theright strategy, you don't have
enough team, you don't chargeenough money, but if you truly
(01:39):
believe that success wasinevitable for you, you would do
different things, and thosedifferent things are what would
generate the success that yousay that you want.
So it's really an identityshift that I provide for people,
more than coaching orconsulting or funnels, and that
has taken me a long time toadmit.
So thank you for asking.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I appreciate that because you know what I see so
much in what you've just said interms of my own journey.
Right, because I started inoperations, I started with
strategy strategic operationsright, because I started in
operations, I started withstrategy.
Yeah, strategic operationsright, like let's help people
build the back end.
And there are so many peoplethat I worked with where I ended
up having to like kind of befor lack of a better word their
conciliary Like this look, weneed to talk, we need to have a
(02:19):
conversation.
Every single day was aconversation about you're not
doing the right things.
Like I can't operationalizeyour business for success until
you're doing the things that youneed to be doing.
And it's interesting how manypeople avoid doing the right
things.
The marketing in this space isso, so good.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah, it's easier to market to disempowered newbies
who believe that they're onefunnel away, like if we look at
the people who are successfuland popular in the area.
That's what they do.
They take people who don't knowanything and they tell them
that they know everything andthen, by staying tethered to
this everlasting communicationsource, that one day they will
(02:58):
be the thing.
But it's not true, and you cantell it's not true, because if
you ask someone a question, likeif you knew you couldn't fail,
what would you do?
It is always somethingdifferent than what they're
doing right now.
Yes, yeah, so like there's asuper easy litmus test for am I
performing at my highest level?
It's literally one question,and if your answer is different
(03:22):
than what you're doing now, thenyou've got an identity shift to
make.
But that is not as compellingto sell as oh, you just need one
tactic, one tweak, one funnel,one new email, one new system,
and then you're going to be amultimillionaire.
That feels much less scary thanyou are going to have to change
the fiber of your being.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
You hit the nail on the head right Everyone wants
the two emails.
All you need is two nine-wordemails and you can make a
million dollars in your nextsale or you know, just posting
fucking income statements andwhatever right, Like it's so
easy to get distracted in thisspace.
Okay, I want to.
I want to pause for a second.
I want to backtrack a littlebit.
Reluctant entrepreneur, Irelate to that.
(04:02):
Tell me how you ended up comingto entrepreneurship, why
reluctant?
Speaker 2 (04:07):
COVID, had there not been a pandemic, I would
absolutely not be anentrepreneur.
I guess being a know-it-all andtalking too much was probably
part of the problem.
Yeah, those qualities didn'thelp me.
You know, when COVID hit, I wasworking two jobs.
So Black people are 12% of thepopulation, but we carry 70
(04:27):
percent of student loan debt,not 17, 70, 70.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so I was working a parttime job to pay my twelve
hundred dollar student loanpayment, even though I had a
full time job at the bank andNBA and securities licenses.
So when COVID hit, they laid meoff my part-time job because
they laid off all thepart-timers, and I was like,
(04:47):
well, that sucks, because that'show I pay my student loan
payment.
You know, even though I'venever had a job that actually
required a degree and we tellourselves that college is not a
scam, felt kind of scammy overhere because I pay more than my
mortgage and car note combinedin student loan payment.
So I said, well, I kind of wentfrom working 60 hours a week, 40
(05:09):
hours at the bank, 20 hourspart time, to working like one
week on at the bank, one weekoff.
We had like a team A and a teamB so in case team A caught
COVID, the whole branch wouldn'thave to shut down.
So I was working 60, 70 hours aweek, 20 hours a week.
I was like this isuncomfortable, I need to fill my
time with something.
And it just so happened thatClubhouse was around and I had
(05:31):
been doing free financialliteracy seminars in the
community.
I've been on TV for them.
And when the school shut downand the churches shut down and
the jobs shut down, who wants afinancial literacy presenter?
So I said, well, I'll just goonline and I'll just disseminate
the information.
And people were like can youcoach me?
You could change my life, canyou coach me?
(05:51):
I'm like I don't really want to.
They're like but no, but youhave to.
I'm begging you.
I'm on bended knee with tearsin my eyes, I beg, I beg and I'm
like I guess so yeah, and I'vealways just taken it too far.
I've always just taken it toofar, like it started off with
just I'm going to have one offeron the side, it's not a problem
.
And then suddenly I wasquitting my job and then I was
like, well, I'm only going tohave like private clients.
(06:12):
And then suddenly we werelaunching like a group.
And then I was like well, we'reonly going to be online and then
suddenly always I'm like a lesslike a non-insane kanye, like
there's always another thing,it's like just one more step,
like one day.
It like I fully believe thatone day I'll wake up a
(06:36):
billionaire with the samefeeling like, yeah, we just took
it too far.
We bought an nhl team, webought like antarctica.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It's like every day is the morning after right.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Yeah, like every day, I wake up and I'm like whoa,
that escalated fast.
Well, I'm really not clear howI have a community that already
has like 20 people in it.
Like that's very confusing, sookay.
From a person who doesn't want acommunity right, from a person
who doesn't run free Facebookgroups to a person who was
supposed to be leaving facebook,like I don't, I don't
(07:07):
understand how any of it happens.
It's.
It's almost like an out-of-body, like you levitate above your
real self and you see yourselfdoing shit and you're like, hey
self, what you got going on downthere and self is like, oh,
don't worry, it's totallyaligned with your plans and
beliefs, it's fine, yeah.
And then it like creates athing and I'm like that's not
(07:28):
aligned with our beliefs andit's like well, it's built now
and we've already sold it, somaybe you should align it to
your beliefs.
Like maybe you should.
It's.
I just I don't know.
I don't know which one is the,the little devil on the shoulder
and which one's the littleangel on the shoulder, because
they both both seem to like Idon't know hopscotch they're
(07:49):
both holding like ends of a jumprope and, like myself, is like
jumping through the rope.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Yeah, it's like I can skip rope.
I can't double dutch.
I don't know what you guys aredoing right Now.
You said something reallyinteresting about a line so
things are happening and they'renot aligned with your beliefs,
but you can align them with yourbeliefs, and that I mean that
right there, the number ofpeople who burn stuff down, I
(08:13):
mean, and this is I mean, thisis something that we all talk
about.
Right, if it doesn't align withyour beliefs, don't do it.
But that's such an interestingperspective shift.
If something doesn't align withyour beliefs, how do you make it
align with your beliefs?
Like, so, the Facebook group.
So here's the backstory y'all.
I woke up one morning and I hadan invitation from Natalie
(08:35):
Bullen to join her Facebookcommunity and I was like Natalie
doesn't usually.
I mean, in fact, the week prior, natalie had emailed or sent me
a message to tell me that thegroup that I had opened for my
summit was spamming people on adaily basis with invites.
And that's a Facebook glitch,because everybody knows that's
not something I do not pitch,slap in the DMs or at all.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
Which is why I reached out to you, because most
people who have been doing thatI had been unfriending and
blocking, but because it was you, I said this doesn't seem right
, this doesn't seem like her andmaybe there actually is
something going on.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
And there was, and that's why.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
I was like, hey, do you know about this?
And you're like uh, never, no.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
So I ended up closing that group and then going back
and opening another one andmaking sure that the settings
aligned with.
You know, do not, please, donot, spam people invitations.
So anyway, it was aninconvenience but it aligns with
what I do.
That's what I did.
So I wake up one morning to mysurprise there's an invitation
for a Facebook group fromNatalie Bullen.
I did not even think twice.
I'm like, yeah, of course I'lljoin it.
And I learned later on that wasnever your intention.
(09:39):
Like you did not want to havethis group.
Like you woke up one morningand basically there were like
thousands of people in thisgroup.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Oh, it was a horrible because I I was in a group
program run by a tyrant who wedon't talk about because she's
litigious, and I got kicked out.
And in that particular programthey lump people by revenue
level and these particular womenwho were in that group were
people I was mentoring for free.
They were at the lowest revenuelevel of the people in this
(10:07):
particular program.
So these were not prospects.
Most of them did not even makethe kind of revenue or run the
kind of business where theywould qualify or even need my
services.
But I knew that they weren'tgoing to get support from that
group where the tyrant wasrunning it.
So, at the goodness of my heart, I became an admin in this
particular group of people andunfortunately, because Facebook
(10:28):
deprioritizes groups, over timeyou stop getting reach.
So even though I would go liveand ask them how they were doing
and try to check in, nobodywould respond back.
And over time you just kind offorget about it because if they
don't respond, I don't show up,they don't see the posts posts I
mean.
So there was proprietaryinformation from the main group
in that channel.
(10:49):
There were about 150 women Iwas mentoring, there were two
other admins and this is thegroup that facebook decides to
send thousands of invites to inthe middle of the night.
Now I have a facebook groupcalled nat'ss it's all the
people who've ever paid mebefore.
Why the fuck couldn't it haveblew up that group?
That would have been theperfect group to fill full of
(11:13):
people, because that group wasalready a promotional group
where I would go to say, hey,your favorite coach is back and
I have an offer.
If you want to get back in thesaddle again with UW, here's how
you can pay me offer.
If you want to get back in thesaddle again with UW, here's how
you can pay me.
I'm not to brag, but imaginehaving the kind of clout where
you can literally put all ofyour buyers in a group and say,
hey, group of buyers, here'sthat thing I'm selling now.
(11:33):
And they'd be like, oh, I can'twait to buy it.
Why would you not fill up thatgroup?
Why would that not be the group?
It's just a lot.
And so, yeah, I woke up to it.
But I wouldn't even say thatmaking the offer fit your
beliefs, because you can't shiftyour belief system like that.
You'll tear your nervous systemup.
Trying to do that, I think abigger thing for me is where am
I going?
So there's a version of youthat makes sense for what you
(11:58):
have now.
If you're middle class, if youpay yourself 50K a year from
your business, there's a versionof you that allows that to
happen.
That version is OK with yourlevel of debt.
That version is OK with thenumber of hours.
That version accepts that youmight need to buy generic paper
towels or that you might need todo your own hair dye.
(12:19):
There's a version of you thataligns with your socioeconomic
status, with the business thatyou have, with the spouse that
you have, with the friends thatyou have.
But if you're like me and yousee your future as vastly
different than your present, theversion of you right now can't
go with you into that new place.
(12:40):
The version of Natalie that isa billionaire that owns part of
an NBA team or part of an NFLteam, that has 200 doors of real
estate and millions of dollarsof stock that person and this
person you're talking to cannotcoexist.
This version of Natalie has todie.
(13:01):
That's the part that peopledon't get.
They cling on to who they arenow and they build offers for
where they are now and they hirefor who they are now and they
invest for who they are now.
Well, all that does is get youmore of what you are now.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
What you already have yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
That's it.
You're just optimizing what youhave and most of us are working
on our growth systems, not ourwealth systems.
For instance, let's say Idecide that I want to be a
multimillionaire and that I wantto invest in some hedge fund.
Well, maybe step one isbecoming an accredited investor.
Like, maybe I should do someresearch.
How do you invest in a hedgefund?
(13:40):
And then you look and you go,oh, you got to be really rich.
How rich do you have to beAccredited investor?
How do you become an accreditedinvestor?
200,000 personal income, 300,000household income, blah, blah,
blah.
I'm an accredited investorbecause I hold securities
licenses.
So I kind of got to leapfrogthe income requirement.
But even if I didn't, if I wasreading it as a lay person 200K.
(14:02):
So then you're like, how do Ipay myself 200K?
Huh, I guess my business needsto do 600, 700, 800k.
Maybe you need to ask yourbookkeeper, maybe you ask your
accountant.
Maybe you realize I have nofinancial management and I need
to start hiring someone to helpme with my money.
So then you go online and go,hey, who's a good bookkeeper?
(14:23):
What's the difference between abookkeeper and a CFO?
And then you hire this personand you say how much do I need
to make revenue to pay myself200,000 so I can be an
accredited investor and startgetting in bed with some of
these deals?
And they might say well, youonly pay yourself 50K a year and
your business makes like 300.
You probably could pay yourself75.
And then maybe, if yourbusiness did 700,000, you could
(14:47):
pay yourself 200.
So then it becomes how do wemake 700,000?
So then you need to assess whatare the price points, how many
leads.
You see how this is logical.
But it starts from the beliefthat I'm already that rich ass
person.
Yeah, I believe that all I'mdestined for is this my brain is
not going to take me down theline of thought that I just
(15:08):
walked you through.
That's the issue that mostpeople have.
They say I want to learn how toinvest and they say that shit.
Every year I make a post.
It's on autopilot every year.
What do you wish you knew aboutmoney?
The number one answer is alwaysinvest in the stock market and
Pete.
The same people say that everyyear.
Why don't those people everhire a financial planner?
(15:28):
This is a real question.
Like you can get a financialplan for between one and $3,000.
These are people who are goingon trips, buying cars, buying
shoes, buying clothes, gettingtax refunds.
Maybe You're telling me they'venever had $3,000 to be able to
get a financial plan, or even afew hundred to meet with a
financial planner one time, oreven go down to the bank and
talk to a financial advisor orask chat.
(15:50):
There's nothing they could doEvery year?
The only answer is I want tolearn how to invest.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
Go on Google.
I don't understand how we havesuch a wealth of information at
our fingertips and yet so manypeople do not take advantage of
that.
I mean, if nothing else, theydon't have the belief they don't
have the belief.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
The belief is the issue, it's not the information.
This is why I also warnentrepreneurs against trying to
position information as the Holygrail.
You're going to buy my programand you're going to get informed
.
Information does nothing.
People have to believe thatthat information will work for
them.
In order for you to beconfident enough to open a
(16:30):
brokerage account and execute atrade, you have to have a belief
that what you do works for thegreater good, that, even if you
don't really know how the stockmarket works, that it's better
for you to get involved and trythan for you to do nothing.
Yeah, you got to have a strongtry than for you to do nothing.
Yeah, you got to have a strongbelief system, and most of us do
not.
We've never been taught how tobe more resilient.
(16:51):
A lot of people only feel goodabout themselves when good
things happen to them.
They only feel good aboutthemselves when they're flush
with cash.
Most people have their networth and their self-worth fused
together like Siamese twins,yeah, so when something bad
happens, they feel like badpeople.
They conflate that thing.
So you're not going to try newstuff if your identity is
(17:13):
attached to winning, if you feellike a failure.
When something doesn't go well,then why would you ever try
anything new?
I don't think everything Itouch will work, but I think
that enough will work for me tokeep going Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I want to talk about the identity piece a little bit,
because you mentioned somethingbefore we started recording.
We were talking about howNatalie paid me the absolute
mother of all compliments andsaid that I'm one of her
favorite people on the internet,which you know.
I take that to heart becausethe fact of the matter is and
you all know this if you've beenfollowing me for a while a lot
of people do not like me.
A lot of people do not like howI show up.
I constantly have mindsetcoaches that I did not give any
(17:51):
sort of permission to connectwith me about telling me that my
mindset is suffering, that I'ma negative person, that you're
never going to have clientsbecause you're constantly
tearing people down.
I've had so many shade postswritten about posts that I've
written like it's absolutelybananas.
So, when somebody says this tome, it means a lot.
And then we joked about thefact that people hate us.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
And I I'm not joking, no no, no, we're not.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Let the guests be clear.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Natalie is not joking .
Speaker 1 (18:23):
But I want to talk about that because I think that
this is really important,because it speaks to identity.
It speaks to, like you alsomentioned, about you know,
having built this clout that youcan just drop into a group of
people that you've collected andsay, here's the thing, and
people will buy it.
There are so many peoplechasing virality and calling
themselves fucking thoughtleaders and all of this, all of
(18:43):
this nonsense.
First of all, what did you doto build this, this clout, this
credibility?
I mean, I think I know theanswer, but I'd like people to
hear it from you.
And why is it actually kind ofa good thing for people not to
like you?
Speaker 2 (18:59):
because that's scary for people.
I don't know why.
I don't know why.
I don't know why my mother toldme that I would not be liked
because I was smarter thanpeople.
My mom told me that my teacherswouldn't like me because I
would be smarter than them.
That's what my mom sent me tokindergarten with Five.
She put me in public school anddeferred not behave, not take
(19:21):
your nap.
My mom taught me that peoplewon't like you because they are
jealous of you.
Adults will be jealous of yourintellect.
Imagine sitting in afive-year-old school with
something like that.
So like I just got to giveAnnie Fleming all the credit.
I just got to give my mom acredit for like, putting that
out there for me.
And, sure enough, my firstgrade teacher was very
(19:42):
intimidated by me.
It was a whole thing.
So she gave me that adviceright in time.
My mom is super churchy, mymom's very religious.
My mom loves God.
Don't say nothing about big Godover there with Annie.
Annie, don't play that right.
But she told me that theycrucified Jesus, as if to say if
Jesus ain't good enough forpeople, certainly you won't be.
(20:02):
So that's how I grew up.
I grew up knowing if they ain'tlike Jesus, they not going to
like me.
They live.
Jesus came to save your souland you hung him on a cross by
his, by his hands with somenails.
I don't think anyone isuniversally liked.
I don't like Beyonce I'm sureI'm one of the only people in
the world that can say that buteverybody don't like everything.
(20:24):
That's just.
It's not going to work that way.
Being universally liked isimpossible, just like perfection
is impossible.
And so I have a lot of ego.
I actually don't like toattempt things that aren't
possible.
I don't mind attempting thingsthat are difficult, but I don't
want to attempt anything that isimpossible, and it is
impossible to please everybody.
(20:46):
That is not real.
So that's not something thatI'm going to invest any of my
time in.
I'm not going to invest evenone minute of my day trying to
be liked by everyone.
I think that a lot of times wefocus on what we don't want.
You know, my stepfather was anEMT.
He's still with us, he just isretired.
Want.
(21:06):
You know, my stepfather was anEMT.
He's still with us, he just isretired.
And when I started driving, heasked me what do you think is
the most dangerous place at thescene of an accident?
I said being in the accident,being one of the two or three
cars that was involved in theaccident, and he said, no, the
most dangerous place to be ispassing the accident.
I said, well, that doesn't makeany sense.
They're in the ditch, theymight be dead.
(21:27):
I'm driving by it.
How could I be in more dangerthan them?
He said because peoplerubberneck when the accident's
off in the ditch.
You take your eyes off the roadand look in the ditch and guess
what happens when you focus onthe ditch, you end up in the
ditch right with them.
Guess what happens when youfocus on the ditch you end up in
the ditch right with them, andthe person who rubbernecks is
(21:48):
more likely to die at the scenethan the people in the original
wreck.
So a lot of us spend a lot oftime focusing on what we don't
want.
We don't want people to dislikeus, we don't want this post to
not get likes, we don't wantpeople to not pay us.
So we're so focused on thenegative outcome that we're
trying to avoid we don'trecognize.
(22:08):
You're putting focus.
Avoiding something takes focus.
It takes focus to avoid anoutcome.
You have to be activelythinking about that outcome over
there to not fall into it,correct it, correct.
So what we don't recognize iswhen you wake up in the morning
and go no-transcript.
(22:31):
Wake up and say I want to bewealthy, focus on the wealth,
don't focus on not being broke.
So when you focus on not beingdisliked, you lose power,
because now the people you couldhave impacted, who could have
liked, you, could have loved youdon't even know you exist
because you spend all your timetrying to water down your
(22:51):
message to not be disliked.
I spend so much time on the goodshit I don't have time for
anything else.
I have a paid community now.
I have private clients.
I have a live event in the fallwhich I don't know why everyone
is not going to be at.
Frankly, I have a merchandisestore now, which is new for me.
I'm writing a book.
(23:11):
We're launching the publicpodcast.
We're launching a paidnewsletter.
I'm really excited about thatbook.
We're launching the publicpodcast.
We're launching a paidnewsletter.
I'm really excited about thatone.
We're pulling content down offFacebook and kind of moving and
diversifying.
In short, I have so muchsuccess to focus on.
Yeah, I don't have time for lowlevel thoughts like what if
(23:35):
someone doesn't like me?
Like that just can't meet.
Imagine having a meeting withyourself and the purpose of the
meeting is people not liking you.
That's essentially what you'redoing when you focus on things
like that.
I just met with my projectmanager today.
We talked about my website.
We talked about the live event.
We talked about onboarding formy new program.
We talked about the circlecommunity.
We talked about my email.
We talked about the circlecommunity, we talked about my
(23:55):
email.
We talked about some of ouroutstanding projects and we ran
late.
That's why I was late heretoday.
We had so much to talk aboutand, frankly, I probably, after
this call, need to get back onthe phone with her and finish
the meeting, because we probablygot another hour worth of stuff
important stuff that moves theneedle for UW to talk about.
I just can't imagine spendingeven one minute of that meeting
(24:21):
going.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
How do we get people to like us?
Speaker 2 (24:22):
what if it doesn't work?
What if people don't buy it?
What if it's not the rightprice?
What if?
None of that is important.
The only thing that's importantis my mission getting fulfilled
, putting more money in thehands of good people who run
ethical businesses.
That's why God put me here toeradicate poverty and middle
(24:45):
classness for women, especiallywomen of color, especially black
women.
So how could somebody'sexternal validation be more
important than my mission?
How could somebody's externalvalidation be more important
than my mission?
How could somebody's opinionabout me matter to any degree?
I just feel like people notinvolved with their mission
enough.
I just feel like people not inlove enough with their craft.
(25:08):
I think people just not selfishenough, because I'm just too
damn selfish, thinking aboutwhat I came here to do, to be
worried about what you thinkabout what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
When did your mission become clear to you?
Like, when did that?
When did that belief kind ofform in you that this is why I
was put on this earth?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Cause I can hear the conviction you know, I was
probably seven or eight WheneverI read the census.
So I was probably seven oreight and read the census that
came out and that census saidthat black people were the
poorest race in the UnitedStates.
Every census since then hassaid the same thing.
They might as well call it theconsensus, because we are
consistently at the bottom.
(25:45):
And I asked my mom, why areblack people poor?
And she said who told you that?
And I said well, it's in thiscensus.
It says that we make less moneythan everybody else.
And I don't understand that,mommy, because you work and
daddy works and we don't seempoor.
And I decided that before I die,somehow the statistics about
(26:08):
black people were going to bedifferent than when I was born.
I haven't fully figured all ofit out yet, but I'm going to do
100 people's worth of work inthis space.
Most people die and they'vedone zero people's worth of work
towards their mission.
They say they care about thesemissions, but a lot of times
when you meet people and say,well, what are you actually
(26:28):
doing to give back to this causethat you say, that you love so
dearly, they're not reallytaking a lot of action.
They love thoughts and prayersand stuff.
Yeah, I want to do a hundredpeople's worth of work in the
missions that I have.
Like.
This is the groundwork gettingmyself really financially
realized and being amultimillionaire.
That's, that's pillar one.
And pillar two is giving backmicro grants, mentorship,
(26:52):
launching the nonprofit.
And then three is thephilanthropy.
You know, my father spent manyyears homeless.
He's a Vietnam vet.
He had some substance abuseissues and the US government
threw him away and I don't likethat.
So I really want to have, youknow, buses that go around and
do like mobile clothes washing,mobile haircuts.
I want to have an initiative tohelp people get their driver's
(27:14):
licenses back, get theiridentification back, so they can
get jobs.
If they want to get jobs, havetiny home communities.
That's big vision because Ihave the capacity.
If you are gifted, if you aresmarter than average, prove it.
Smart people like to prove thatthey're smart.
They like to write books andthey like to talk real talk and
they like to use, you know, TIlevel words.
(27:36):
They want to sound like athesaurus.
Prove it in your action.
If you really are smarter thanother people, then you should
bear more fruit.
So I feel like the fruit at theend of my life will tell just
how smart I actually was.
Was I smart or was I just egodriven?
And there is a difference.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
There's a huge difference.
I think a lot of people, I meanyou, say, get clear.
And I don't think a lot ofpeople have a mission.
I don't think I think they havea lot of.
It'd be nice if, but they don'thave a clear cut mission of
like no, this is the change,this is the change I want to see
.
No, you absolutely do.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
I don't care what, in the short term, the things that
we complain about.
This person didn't make good ontheir payment plan.
This live event didn't sell asmany tickets as we wanted.
In the grand scheme of things,none of that really matters.
What matters is continuing todo the thing and putting
yourself out there.
(28:28):
You can accelerate any goal ifyou're willing to do the
uncomfortable change.
And experts in particularparticular, they have these
fancy frameworks and systems andvenn diagrams have trademarked
all of it.
You know what I'm talking about.
How often do you install yoursystem on your own self?
I do that on myself all thetime, yeah, yeah, so that I know
(28:50):
where my upper limit is and Iknow where my, my belief is.
I know where my growth edge is.
All the time it's like um, thenew jumanji movie, um, yeah, and
like they only got the nextstep.
So they didn't see the wholemap, they only saw the, the
obstacle they were up against atthat time a lot of people
trying to wait to get a wholemap and see what's all coming.
(29:11):
You, you just got to take onestep, yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Just that's all you can take?
You can't, you cannot plan for20 steps down the road, but
that's what people try to do.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
That's why people who've never made a sale hire
eight figure coaches.
Tell you how many people havegotten in my DMs trying to run
masterclasses and webinars andrun ads when they've never
served even one private client?
Why are you working with thiscoach who has these very
advanced systems that require ahuge audience, a huge marketing
(29:43):
budget, 10 team members, and youknow you have none of that.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
people want to skip all the steps and there's
because they don't want to dothe uncomfortable work of having
to, like you said, shift theirbelief in their identity.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Nobody does, nobody does.
No one wants to douncomfortable work, but the ones
who are making a difference arethe ones who are doing it.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
They suck it up and they do it Right Agreed.
I think that's the bigdifference that people don't
understand.
They hear people like youtalking.
They hear people like youtalking and they're like well,
you know what, I can just copywhat they do, or I can jump on
the bandwagon or jump on thecoattails of this person or that
person, but they're not sittingdown and understanding like you
(30:24):
have to have a purpose.
Your purpose cannot be dictatedby somebody else and you have
to be so laser focused on thatpurpose that everything else is
irrelevant.
But there are not enough peoplewho are that convicted in
anything, let alone business, orpurpose or mission.
They're just not convictedenough.
They want the bare minimumbecause it keeps them
(30:46):
comfortable, but then they alsowant the privilege of
complaining about the fact thatthat's all they have.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
I don't get that.
I mean you're right.
I just I don don't know.
I don't think you can shortcutthe work.
No, that's my belief system.
So because that's my beliefsystem, I don't really try to
shortcut the work.
I also need my beliefs to berooted.
In fact, I've never met asuccessful person who has
sidestepped doing all the work.
So I actually don't believeit's possible and my lived
(31:12):
experience continues toreinforce that it's not possible
.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
So well, that's why I don't like language around
short cutting and collapsingtimelines and things like that,
because I think it gives a falseimpression of what is possible.
Right, I just, I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I think there's a level where that makes sense,
like right now having servedover a thousand clients, having
had 12 launches coming in on,we're closing in on 1.5 million
cumulative revenue.
Cumulative, that was not oneyear.
I'm not a seven-figure businessowner.
Let's not lie on the internetPeople like to lie has to be an
(31:50):
all-in-one year for you to beable to say that.
Has to be one year, one fiscalyear or one calendar year, you
pick.
But now if people say I couldgive you a shortcut, it's not
completely a lie because I haveenough data for a statistician
type person to be able to saywell, actually, natalie, you
don't need five steps to sellthis.
(32:12):
You've already sold it eighttimes and you've proven that
really, this step and this stepwere the ones that kind of moved
the needle.
So maybe you don't need fivesteps to sell this.
You've already sold it eighttimes and you've proven that
really, this step and this stepwere the ones that kind of moved
the needle.
So maybe you don't need thatmaster class.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
That's not a shortcut though.
That's clarity.
That's like a clear and directpath.
That's not shortcut.
Shortcut is like you don't haveto do these things because you
don't like them you have to.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
You have to at least once, twice, three or four times
if, because you have to havedata, and that's what's so
interesting.
Let me put it this way ifyou're not gonna have data, then
just go full woo and admit that.
You just do shit from your gutand you just figure it out as
you go along.
But you can't do both.
It's the lie about both thatbothers me the most.
It's the well.
(32:50):
I kind of trust my gut when Idon't have data.
Now you see why I refuse to bea business coach anymore.
My private coaching is moving towealth, identity and authority.
Only.
Only you have to have alreadymade money.
You have to already be sellingsomething.
Your marketing and systems aredialed in.
You don't need me to help youwith ops or calendars or
anything.
You need to become the type ofperson who makes the
(33:14):
uncomfortable change to growyour business period.
That's what my private coachingis going to be, because sales
coaching attracts people whohave no sales and business
coaching attracts people with nobusiness.
Now, that's not an absolute.
There are business coaches whoserve real people, but they
don't flock to me.
Let me tell you, I get thewant-a-preneurs who are, who are
just like, hey, I've never soldanything at all.
(33:36):
Can you help me?
Or like asking questions thatare really strange, like I'll
have people say what should thetitle of my workshop be, and
they'll give me four titles thatare unrelated to each other.
So it's not like a semantics,it's like the topic, and I'm
like I don't know what's theoutcome of the programming,
because the title needs tocorrelate to the programming.
(33:59):
Well, I don't know, I haven'tset up the programming yet.
Uh, okay, well, what is theupsell?
Like, what is when they come tothe master class, you're gonna
sell them something.
What is that?
Well, I don't know.
I'm kind of working throughthat too.
Then why are we starting at thetitle?
Like it's the complete wrongthing to try to pick, you don't?
I'm writing a book.
It has kind of a working gist,but the title of this book is
(34:22):
not going to be revealed untilthe book is written.
Yeah, when the book is writtenas a whole and it is edited for
clarity and we read it front toend, then certain names will be
this could work and certainnames will be absolutely not
because of the content.
Why would you start with thename?
It's just like people withthose stupid acronyms they call
(34:42):
frameworks.
They'll be like a money person,so they want the framework to
be the wealth frameworkw-e-a-l-t-h.
So they try to put some likecomplicated shit together, the
like working everything alltogether, lima, tango, hero
method, like they try to makethe acronym work and you could
(35:03):
tell they started with theacronym and tried to shoehorn
the thing.
But it's the method.
The method is more importantthan the acronym and you could
tell.
That's why I don't listen tonikki minaj anymore.
You can hear her set up herpunch line three lines early
because she will say somethingthat doesn't make any sense.
You can tell she's trying towork into tyrant because she's
(35:24):
saying crazy stuff like hydrant,vibrant.
Look at my hair is pink, isvibrant, I squirt like a hydrant
.
You're a tyrant.
And it's like girl.
We saw that coming like fourlines ago because you've been
saying really weird shit at theend of every line for like two
(35:44):
stanzas.
We get it.
You could tell when people weretrying to back into something.
You actually don't have to dothat.
Your, your, your frameworkdoesn't have to be an acronym.
Yeah, it doesn't have to becute, buttoned up, polished
thing and I think people get sostuck on that that they lose
sight of the fact that this issupposed to be helpful and
logical for the right person.
(36:06):
Yeah, not necessarily flashy orfancy.
You know, money coach, oh,here's my money method.
Oh dear, here we go.
What does the o stand for?
Opulence, occlusive operations.
Because that they wanted theword money.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Because they felt like the marketing is always the
focus.
The marketing has always beenthe focus.
There are too many businessowners who are actually just
marketing.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
They're trying to be marketers yeah, it's trash I'm a
terrible marketer man.
I don't care what anybody says,I tell the truth too much.
I just want to tell the truth.
Okay, and sales is more funthan marketing, anyway, in my
opinion.
I like to actually conversationgoing.
I like to actually collect themonies.
You know what I mean.
So for me, um, marketing Iwon't say it's a necessary evil
(36:53):
because that makes it soundunpleasant.
I actually really likemarketing my own stuff.
But to me, a great marketingkind of eliminates sales and
great product kind of eliminatesmarketing.
And if you don't believe me, askyourself how ChatGPT marketed
itself to you.
What ad did you see?
What did ChatGPT do to get you?
(37:14):
Nothing?
Other people sold you on usingchat gpt.
They went on facebook and theyraved about how great it was and
you downloaded it and yousigned up for it and you paid
for it.
That's what happened.
They did zero to market to youor sell to you, because they
didn't have to, because theproduct was great.
So if you make the product great, half of your job is already.
(37:36):
Cashmere club is a greatproduct.
I'm not going to beg people toget in it or stay in it, because
it already has a great valueproposition.
As a matter of fact, I thinkpeople are going to tell other
people about it.
I think that my job is going tobe done once I get this cohort.
I mean, obviously it'll existand we'll have to treat our
people well.
But if you have to, I tellpeople.
(37:57):
If marketing is a nightmare,like not, you don't know how to
market.
You know how to market andyou've spent the money and it's
still hard.
The product probably needs help.
And see people get so involvedin this is my baby, this is my
project, this is my this andthat, and they're so ego driven
they build stuff that has nodemand.
That's the thing I'll neverunderstand as long as I live.
(38:18):
Like we don't have time today,but I'll never understand the
Natalie.
No one wants this, no one askedfor this, but I built it anyway
.
That is so confusing.
If you don't have 10 or 15people who are willing to buy
something, why did you make it?
But then they blame.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
It's a sales problem.
It's a marketing problem.
It's a positioning problem.
It's a mess.
It's none of that.
Your product is shit.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
Nobody wants it like it has to solve a problem that
people want solved, like I had aclient send me these beautiful
flowers for my four-yearbusiness anniversary and maybe
there is a product that iscalled a pedal keeper and it
could be a little skirt thatgoes around this potted plant
that catches the pedals and andsweeps them into the trash can
(39:02):
for me.
But I don't get flowers enoughto buy something whose sole
purpose is to sweep pedals offof this desk.
I would rather just throw thewhole arrangement away
eventually because they areflowers.
Maybe I will take one rose andI will press it so I can keep it
in a book, but the rest I willhappily throw away.
So maybe it solves a problem,but is it a big enough problem?
(39:24):
Is it a common enough problem?
Is it an irritating enoughproblem for a person to pay to
fix it?
And the answer to that isusually no.
It's also how people end up inmodels that they hate.
It's why I don't have atraditional membership.
I had somebody DM me.
You know one of the people whohates me.
I told you people hate me.
I thought you would never, everhave a community.
(39:47):
You're a hypocrite.
You talk about low ticketmemberships and here you go,
launching a low ticketmembership and I'm like well,
first of all, a low ticketmembership is $7 a month or $27
a month or maybe even $97 amonth.
I'm making all my peoplecommitted to a year up front, so
I don't know how that could beconflated with a low ticket
membership.
Two, I'm selling it to affluentpersons.
(40:07):
I don't know very manymemberships that are purposely
doing that, that are turningpeople down because of an income
level.
Most of the memberships that Iget targeted will take anybody
with a pulse and a paypal.
Yeah right, um.
And three, if you don't fightchurn, you don't have a
membership, because churn is thebig issue is that people can
come and go meet people onnational average stay in
(40:29):
memberships three months.
So even if you make them committo a quarter, that's the only
quarter you're going to get.
So it's important for you torecognize that people will harp
on what they want to harp on.
Now, this person is probably areally good person and they
probably have a husband andmaybe even a child, and they
probably run a business that Ihope has a mission, vision and
value and it might even havesome OK marketing.
(40:51):
But instead of spending timemeeting with their team,
investing in the stock market,getting on the treadmill, eating
a nutritious meal, gettingextra sleep, having sex with
their partner, organizing theirasana, putting up a new job ad,
hiring a business coach, goingto therapy.
They decided to spend 10minutes messaging me about
(41:14):
something I said I didn't wantto do six months ago in a post.
I forgot that I wrote yeah,it's not that people can't be
successful is that they don't dothe work that it takes to be
successful.
They are so focused on whatother people have and what other
people do.
I told you earlier I'm anon-crazy Kanye.
I am laser focused on me.
(41:36):
I don't have a lot of time tofocus on other people in general
.
It's just not my vibe.
I like me, I love me.
I think me is great.
So as long as those things aretrue, then that's where I'm
going to put my focus, and so Ipray for people who are like
that, because they never will besuccessful.
(41:56):
They don't have time because ifthey're messaging me stupid
crap like that, they'remessaging other people's stupid
crap like that.
These are the people who wantto go back and forth with you on
your posts and they want to beargumentative.
Go find some business.
I actually have a lot ofclients.
People think I'm around onsocial media all the time.
I haven't been on Facebook day.
I probably won't be a meetingwith one of my mentees.
I'm going to be promoting aspeaking engagement.
(42:18):
I need to do some recordingsfor a course and I need to
prepare for my calls tomorrow.
You know my husband's going tobe back in a few hours.
I like to greet him at the door.
I like to make sure he haslunch.
So I really, really really willnot have time to argue with
people about the super bowl to.
I just won't have time and so,like when I, when people do
(42:42):
stuff like that, I just I'm likepoor little ting ting.
They can't be making any money.
They have so much timeavailable to them to do things
that have no meaning and won'tshift their life in any way.
If you've ever met me, you knowthat you're not going to
convince me to do anything.
That wasn't my idea.
So it's a complete waste oftime and it also makes you
(43:05):
wonder.
You know it's part of why I'mmoving.
I won't say I'm leaving socialmedia, but I'm moving away from
it.
It's the pair of socialrelationships.
People actually think that theyknow me.
They think that their opinionmatters.
They slide my DMs.
I know you said this and I knowyou said that and I know you
said who are you?
That's always my first thing.
Who are you?
Right, content isn't coachingJust because you read my post.
(43:27):
That is not equivalent to youknow me or I like you or I want
to hear from you.
Me making a post online is youknow and so like.
That's part of my inner workI've done on myself.
Where am I still overgiving andwhere am I still trying to
showcase my value and worth andwhere am I still performing like
(43:49):
a scrappy entrepreneur that'sbrand new and has to crank out
content to get clients?
And how can I move intoshowcasing my methodology and my
systems to be able to call inthe best client Because I can
make money.
Making money has never been myproblem.
Most entrepreneurs, theirproblem is making money.
(44:10):
That's the whole problem.
Their business does not makethe money that they want it to
make and that's the struggle andit's always been the struggle.
If that's not your struggle, youstart to find that you have a
lot of time to do something else, cause eventually you're, like
you get a little bored, you knowso, like for me, it's always
making sure that I have achallenge but that I'm not
burning myself out.
So my brain is always teeteringon that edge.
(44:31):
It just can't.
I just I don't even rememberwhat people post.
When people DM me and go, hey,did you like my post?
Or I saw that you liked my postI don't even know what posts
they're talking about.
Like I'm so laser focused on meI barely even read other
people's stuff.
Like I know that sounds soconceited, but I'm trying to
hone my craft, I'm trying to getbetter at this content thing so
(44:52):
I can write less content.
You know people ask Natalie,why do you post seven times a
day?
I was lazy and I was shit atwriting content.
I'm just going to be honest andI knew if I wrote seven posts a
day, at least one of them willbe great without me even having
to try.
So now trying to distill downto one or two posts is making me
have to be better at writing.
(45:17):
I can't just fill my timelinewith fluff and what I used to do
.
I used to be like let me justthink about this post.
Now it's like does thisshowcase my method?
Does this speak to my absolutebest buyer?
Does this funnel people tosomething other than my DMs,
because my DMs are crazy?
Or is this an auntie, nat, hey,this is what you need to do to
get your shit together type post?
Or is this a rah-rah, sis, boom, bah, get up and make some
sales posts, because thosearen't really the kind of posts
(45:40):
that are going to push mythought leadership to the next.
That just fills up my page withcrap to where my team can't
even find the post that I'mlooking for to put in my book.
The content mountain made my egofeel good, but it wasn't making
the impact I need, and itworked for the version of
Natalie that existed when shewrote it.
(46:00):
It just doesn't work for theversion that I am today the best
thing you can do as anentrepreneur, if you take one
thing from all of my ramblingtoday accept that you will be a
new version all the time.
Treat yourself like software.
Accept that you are softwareand that you will be a new
version all the time.
Treat yourself like software.
Except that you are softwareand that you will be going
through iteration and that everynew version overrides the old
(46:22):
one.
Yeah, it has to.
You can't keep them all.
A lot of us want to keep allthe old versions.
If you're elder, millennial,you've probably got a box with
every Apple product you've everbought.
Every iPhone you buy, you keepthe box.
I know y'all got the boxes.
Don't lie, say you don't havethem.
Override, override, right, likeit has to erase and replace the
(46:45):
old version.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Listen, I'm a Gen X, I don't keep no boxes and I
immediately get rid of everydevice, I know, but the
millennials are like damn it,she taught me.
I do have 20 Apple boxes in myhouse and they're all empty and
I haven't had the device forlike six years.
Yeah, I know, Exactly right.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
I have the box for the TV that I bought when I was
in college.
Because I still have that TV.
It's like 15 years old.
It has the receipt taped to it.
I bought it Black Friday inperson.
Remember when we used to doin-person.
Speaker 1 (47:15):
Black Friday shopping , lining up at three in the
morning.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
Yep, yes, I was at Walmart at four in the morning.
Thanking God I didn't gettrampled.
That was me.
I was at the back of the pack,though, because I was fat and I
already knew, if it came down toany kind of physical
altercation, that I was justgonna lose.
I have like ridiculous pointyacrylic nails like I could like
scratch you, but that's aboutthe athletiest I'm gonna get
(47:40):
like I'm not really.
Yeah, I'm not.
I'm not like I'm strong, butI'm not athletic, and there's
definitely a difference.
Like athletic requires agilityor coordination or hand-eye
something.
Yeah, I've got none of that.
I can kick you really hard.
That that I can do so like youhave to know your strengths, but
that that's the thing.
(48:00):
And like, when I meet peopleand they're like Natalie, I
didn't have a mom like you did.
What can I do?
And I'm like then, be my mom.
They're like what do you mean?
Be my mom?
My mom was in constant,unwavering source of positive
energy.
Be that for yourself.
Don't speak anything negativeto yourself ever.
My mom doesn't.
(48:21):
If I call my mom right now andI pick, if I call my mom on this
podcast, my mom hey sweetie,hey honey, how is your day?
I'm doing well, mom, how areyou and she's going to start
talking about God and she'sgoing to talk about her day.
And if I go, mom, I'm down.
You shouldn't be down.
You're a child of the most highGod.
What's wrong?
(48:43):
Like my mom has never insultedme, she has never called me out
of my name, she's never calledme stupid or dumb or ignorant,
even when, even when I sinned,even when she was frustrated,
even when she was mad, even whenshe found out I was drinking or
out partying or having sex.
Like never, ever, have I gottena cross word from my mother.
So I get it.
Maybe your mom's not like that,then maybe you need to be your
mom.
Like, get in programs likepositive intelligence that help
(49:05):
you rewire your belief system,that negative track in your
brain.
Like anytime, like journal,anytime you start thinking man,
I'm a piece of shit, man, I'mnot worth anything.
Man, I, I can't do this Journalthat I feel like a piece.
Like, write it down and then,like, talk to your therapist
about, like, who put thosethings in your mind, because you
didn't do it.
That's someone else's voice,it's your parents, or the
(49:27):
bullies, or your ex-husband.
You decide, you decide.
Okay, I didn't have an AnnieFleming as a mom, but I can
still have that voice in my headbecause I choose to.
You know what I'm saying.
Like, I just I'm not saying Idon't have privilege, but
sometimes you can manufactureprivilege.
(49:48):
Sometimes you can make your ownsituation better.
Jay-z is a billionaire marriedto arguably one of the most
attractive women.
I might not like Beyonce'smusic, but she's hot.
Let's be for real.
She looks great and she'salways looked great.
She's been hot 20 years.
So Jay-Z was born into projects.
I can't say I've really evenlike been to the projects.
(50:10):
Definitely not like big cityprojects.
No, I've never been to thelevel of projects that he grew
up in new york, absolutely notlike the projects in alabama are
not, because we don't have thegang violence.
So like no, I've never in myformative years.
He was poor.
He had to sell drugs.
You could argue that I live avery privileged lifestyle
compared to sean carter.
(50:31):
How was he a billionaire?
Because at some point hedecided that his identity as a
kid in the project selling drugsto help his parent wasn't
really the person he was.
He realized this is the thingI'm doing.
This is not the person I am.
So then he decided because I ama mogul, I'm going to start
(50:51):
behaving like a mogul instead ofbehaving like a kid who lives
in the projects.
And it wasn't overnight, butlike it happened.
So we all have some amount ofprivilege.
Maybe we don't realize it.
Some of us have prettyprivilege.
Some of us have parents whowent to college.
Some of us have never been poor.
If you're only, if you've onlyever been middle class, you
(51:12):
actually have privilege.
If you've only ever been middleclass, you actually have
privilege.
Yeah, if you've never missed ameal, you actually have
privilege.
So, like, use it, use yourprivilege.
Like, yeah, use whatever you'vegot to get what you want.
I'm.
I have higher than averageintellect.
I am privileged.
Why would I downplay.
Why would I be like well, it'snot fair for me to be smart
because everyone can't be smart,so let me not use my smarts.
(51:34):
How would that sound Like?
Why wouldn't you use the giftyou need to go use your talent
or you will lose your talent.
So I've never liked the ideathat Natalie doesn't have to
work for it.
Natalie was just born withthese perfect genes and these
perfect parents and that's whyshe can do stuff that I can't do
.
It's like that's, that's a,that's a cop-out man.
(51:55):
Yeah, that's a cop-out.
I wasn't.
I wasn't great.
I was a villain.
Early y'all are getting likeafter therapy, natalie, like
y'all are getting a Natalieworth knowing.
I was a mean child okay, I was.
I was a snarky oh my God.
And in college I wasintolerable.
(52:17):
I am a person worth knowing.
Now, I was not always.
So I think it's easy for us totell ourselves someone else is
better equipped to do the thing,but God wouldn't have put the
idea in your head if you weren'tqualified to execute it.
Speaker 1 (52:33):
It's letting yourself off the hook, and I really, I
love what you're saying, becausewhat came to mind as I was
listening to you was be theperson you deserve to be Right.
Be the person you deserve to be.
Speaker 2 (52:43):
I deserve to be rich and fulfilled and satisfied and
happy.
And so if I'm not that personright now, then like I need to
do everything I can to get there.
I think sometimes we're waitingon external things.
I think the only way I'm goingto have the life I want to have
and that's if I fight tooth andnail is to decide the kind of
(53:04):
life I'm going to have and takeactions every single day towards
that life.
That's the only way.
But waiting on people to likeme, waiting on me to lose weight
, waiting on me to have moremoney, a better website, a
copywriter, a project manager, abetter scope and own franchise,
(53:25):
like if I'm waiting and waiting, that's going to be years from
now.
And what are you doing whileyou wait?
You got to stay ready so youdon't have to get ready.
Y'all not ready.
I've had people who could havegotten grants but they couldn't
pass the financial check becausethey didn't have their books up
to date.
I've had people that I wouldhave been able to get on stage
(53:45):
to get a $1,500 speaking fee,but they didn't have a keynote
speech or a media page or a.
They didn't have it.
They couldn't produce a speakerreel or any kind of proof.
These were people who weretelling me, natalie, I'm
actively looking to be a speaker.
I found a gig that was lookingfor speakers in their lane and I
knew the coordinator and handedtheir name over and they could
(54:08):
not come up with the documentsto prove they were actually a
speaker.
You got to stay ready, so youdon't have to get ready.
So all of that time that peoplespend hating me, hating you,
complaining about our content,complaining about why I didn't
approve their posts in myFacebook group that I never even
saw because I was serving myclients, all that time you spent
you could have been getting thethings you need to actually
(54:29):
move your business forward.
That time is the time that youcould have written the content
that you say you don't have timeto write, or the sales page
that still isn't up, or thespeaker reel.
They're like well, I've neverspoken professionally.
Make your own stage.
Why you think?
I have my own event every year?
Because I know I can make moreon my own stage than anybody
(54:50):
will pay me to be on theirs.
So, like if I die with nothing,I threw it all away.
I threw all of my privilege andinfluence.
I threw it all away.
Why?
Because I was worried aboutsomeone's opinion Because I was
worried about failure, because Iwas trying to be perfect.
Oh, those sound like terriblereasons to live beneath your
(55:12):
purpose.
That's heart-wrenching.
I could never imagine.
I could never imagine tellingsomebody my fear of your
unsolicited opinion as anunsuccessful person that I've
never met on the internet keptme from doing what God put me
here to do.
Speaker 1 (55:31):
Y'all, that's the mic drop.
You didn't know you needed.
Speaker 2 (55:34):
That would just be such a crazy thing, and I almost
want to tell people that thenext time somebody messages me
some BS I think that's exactlywhat I'm going to say.
Speaker 1 (55:43):
I think you should Imagine if everything that you
have said today was necessaryfor people to hear, and I want
to thank you for coming in andjust being your true, honest
self, because I do get a lot ofpeople who pitch the podcast,
(56:03):
who come on the podcast and Ican see you know they're trying
to say the things that they knowthat they can use as soundbites
later and that's totally fine.
Like you, come here, however,you need to come here, but,
honestly you, this was less apodcast appearance than it was a
sermon at church, so y'all justbeen taking church, that's what
(56:24):
we do.
Speaker 2 (56:25):
That's what people needed to hear Today.
Speaker 1 (56:26):
That is what people needed to hear, so thank you for
just thank you I appreciate youso very much.
Speaker 2 (56:32):
This was I got to get my thoughts out.
I Just thank you.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
I appreciate you so very much.
This was I got to get mythoughts out.
I appreciate you.
Okay, last thing Tell peoplewhere they can find you.
Where would you like people to?
Speaker 2 (56:39):
find you, they can go to my website,
unapologeticwealthcom, or theycan find me on Facebook.
I'm the only Natalie Bullen.
You'll see.
Sarah will put it down in theshow notes for you, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (56:55):
So okay, for this week we are adjusting that final
tagline.
Some of you can have successwithout the BS, but you all need
to come back to church nextweek.
Speaker 2 (56:59):
So I will talk to you .
Then Stop, if you can, bye.
Speaker 1 (57:07):
That's it for this week.
Thanks for listening to theBusiness Blasphemy Podcast.
We'll be back next week with anew episode, but in the meantime
, help a sister out bysubscribing and, if you're
feeling extra sassy rating thispodcast, and don't forget to
share the podcast with others.
Head over tobusinessblasphemypodcastcom to
connect with us and learn more.
Thanks for listening andremember you can have success
(57:27):
without the BS.
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