September 5, 2023 • 49 mins
In this episode of the Can We Start Over podcast, hosts Brit and Lindsey explore the topic of moving to a new city, town, or even a boat!
They share their experiences and provide valuable insights on why stepping out of your comfort zone and exploring new places is essential.
Britt and Lindsey explore why staying in the city or town you grew up in can hold you back. Young people should move to a new city, like today. But, even parents with children can learn a lot, feel freer, and live authentically by choosing to move to a new city.
Throughout the episode, they touch on deep topics such as the human condition, suffering, and the importance of community. It's an enlightening and entertaining episode that's sure to inspire anyone who's been thinking about making a big move.
Listeners will also learn about Lindsey's transformative journey -- Inner Being Reset is a deep, somatic & energetic healing session that will open your creative flow and leave you feeling recharged, energized, and deeply peaceful. Book your session here.
Britt and Lindsey proudly introduce their new venture, Right Kind Podcasting, which helps aspiring podcasters get started and succeed in the industry. Whether you are starting from scratch or already have a podcast but need help with editing and social content, they've got you covered. Learn more about their full spectrum podcast service HERE and Email HERE to schedule a free clarity call.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Britt (00:15):
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode of
Can We Start Over Podcast.
My name is Brit.
And I
Lindsey (00:21):
am Lindsay.
Thank
Britt (00:23):
you for being here.
You may notice that we sound waybetter than we used
Lindsey (00:26):
to.
That's because we got a brandnew fancy bansy setup.
Britt (00:31):
Yeah, now that we're still and we're in one place
Lindsey (00:34):
for a while.
Yeah, this would be such a painin the ass to pack and travel
with only three suitcases andfive people.
There's no
Britt (00:42):
way.
Yeah, most of the other episodeswere recorded all in different
places.
With this tiny setup that wouldfit in a small bag.
So now I'm glad to have like aquality setup in a place where
we can just walk over and hitrecord.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lindsey (00:55):
It feels really good.
Yeah.
If you are new here, we're soglad you're here.
Thank you for listening.
I'm Lindsay.
This is Brit.
You already heard that, but weare a married couple who decided
to sell our house, sell all ofour stuff, take our three kids
on a trip around the world tofind a new home.
And along the way, we startedtalking to people who started
(01:17):
over in their own amazing ways.
So that's what you're listeningto.
Our starting over story, otherpeople's starting over stories.
Hopefully it sparks someinspiration for you to start
over.
Cause I bet I'd be willing tobet.
I'm just going to go ahead andbet that there is something that
you want to do in your life thatmaybe you're not ready to do or
(01:39):
you think, I don't know, could Ido it?
And you can.
So hopefully you're herelistening to our story and other
stories to get that inspirationand know that you can start
over.
Today we are talking about Inessence of starting over, why
you should move to a new city,or a new place, or a new town, a
village, or a boat.
(02:01):
Just move somewhere.
Britt (02:03):
You may think that's weird, but just listen, okay?
Just listen through.
It'll make sense by the end.
We have so many reasons why thatis what's next for you.
Lindsey (02:11):
We wanted to talk about it because we didn't move out of
our hometowns other than justfive miles, 20 miles away within
the same area until we were 40.
And It's amazing that it tookthat much time and effort for us
to move when we both wanted to.
(02:32):
So that's what we get intotoday.
Why you should move.
If you have a calling to aplace, I hope that you listen to
this and then you take the nextstep to go there.
And
Britt (02:42):
now we've got some really exciting news for you.
Lindsey (02:44):
When we started this podcasting journey, people kept
asking us, how do you do this?
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Or I have a podcast, but it'skind of fizzled out.
I don't pay attention to itanymore because it's too much to
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(03:26):
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Britt (05:20):
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Lindsey (05:28):
This is a great episode.
I'm excited for everyone to hearit.
It was really good to connectwith you, Brit.
It's been a minute since we justsat down and chatted and it
feels amazing every time we doit.
It really does.
Britt (05:40):
All right, let's do it.
Why do your eyes do
Lindsey (05:46):
that?
Why do your eyes, why are theyable to cross?
Uh,
Britt (05:50):
cause maybe sometimes you need to see, I don't know,
your
Lindsey (05:54):
nose.
Because you can't go them out,you can't go them outwards,
Britt (06:00):
is that how you say it?
You can't go them outwards,
Lindsey (06:03):
But that's where you need to see is out because maybe
you need to see there's likesomething happening on the left,
like a ninja is coming for youand on the right you still want
to watch your shows.
Right.
So like you need your eyes to gothem out, but you can't go on,
but you can only go on in.
Hmm.
(06:23):
Huh.
Are we finding, like, the fatalflaw of
Britt (06:27):
humans?
Eye stuff?
Yeah.
Of eye stuff.
Fatal flaw
Lindsey (06:31):
of eye stuff?
No, no, just of humans ingeneral.
If we could fix that, thenthey're probably...
We could probably cureeverything.
Mmm.
What do you think about that?
Thoughts on, thoughts on curingeverything, go.
Britt (06:43):
Mmm.
Ooh, I think we need bad thingsto kill people, right?
Isn't that what scientists say?
I don't
Lindsey (06:50):
know if that's what scientists say, but it's
definitely a lot ofspirituality.
Not, not that you need badthings to kill people.
That's not like necessarily aspirit.
Britt (06:58):
Well, they have to die.
There's not enough
Lindsey (07:00):
room for everyone.
Yeah.
We get so caught up in like thegood and the bad that really on
this longer trajectory, what isgood and bad.
And also maybe if bad stuffdidn't happen, then after like a
week we in our like holiness ofnothing bad happening, we'd
probably just get really bored.
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
(07:21):
There has to be some kind ofsuffering baked in, but
sometimes I still have a problemwith that man.
Because like, there's thissuffering that we like, that we
all kind of think of when it'slike, oh yeah, suffering, or
even someone's sick orsomething, but then there's
like, horrible suffering thatI'm like, does that need to, do
we need that too?
I don't, I don't know.
But I think that's like, maybealso the, I don't know, the
(07:45):
human condition just.
Amplified that causes greatersuffering that is unneeded like
we definitely don't need that.
Yeah, you know, but we have itSo that's like we're like we
came to this Earthly plane ashumans with some amount of
suffering But we're so stuck inthe humanness that we like
(08:06):
create this deeper Deeper deeperwell of suffering that we don't
even need God.
And so we just have toincrementally turn it back away
from the unneeded suffering.
Wow.
Do what we can like little bylittle.
I think I, I think we did justsolve it, right?
Britt (08:26):
I think so.
I think now, now you shouldwrite a book on that.
Lindsey (08:28):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Turning, turning it backincrementally.
Yeah.
And yeah, so much of sufferingthough, when you look at it as
like yawn.
Britt (08:39):
Yawn.
Yeah.
We.
Hold on just a sec.
You can be bummed about how thecomputer just stopped recording
and we lost.
Yeah.
There's suffering.
A good bit of that.
There's suffering.
I'm suffering
Lindsey (08:49):
a bit over this.
I'm like, what did I say?
Oh.
And that's a really good exampleof like suffering that is.
It's such a paradox because it'slike meaningless.
And yet also you should be ableto feel the feeling fully.
And when we do that, it takes somuch less time and then it just
(09:10):
like melts away.
So what's the answer?
Britt (09:15):
Oh goodness.
I don't know.
You're the one writing the bookabout it.
Lindsey (09:20):
My book coming out.
Next year about I can't rememberbutter
Britt (09:25):
butter the butter real
Lindsey (09:28):
What do you Like about living in a new city, would you
say you live in a new city?
Oh, I absolutely
Britt (09:37):
would say that Now should we define city?
I don't know.
Would you say you live in a newplace?
I live in a new place Yeah, Ilive in a new place.
That is almost the polaropposite of the old place And
boy, I'm, I'm loving it.
Lindsey (09:53):
What do you think?
Britt (09:55):
Trademark.
Lindsey (09:56):
McDonald's.
They're a sponsor.
Go into any McDonald's right nowand just say Brit's name and
they'll give you a free largefry.
Guaranteed.
Also, none of this isguaranteed.
My guarantee to you, I have asolid guarantee that there is
absolutely no guarantee behindanything I say.
You need to figure out foryourself.
(10:18):
What do you think?
This is.
You're 41.
Sorry to age you.
I'm 30.
I'm 40, I think.
What do you think stopped youfrom moving to a new place,
city, town, village, island,boat before?
Britt (10:39):
Ooh, that sounds like a lot of new opportunities you
just said.
But anyway, back to thequestion, what stopped me
before?
Oh man, fear.
Uh, not having a job or themoney to do it.
Leaving my job.
Leaving my friends.
Yeah.
Having to make new ones.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
(11:00):
And you know what I've figuredout?
I can do all of those things.
Lindsey (11:03):
Right.
Like, literally, it all unfolds.
Perfectly.
And that's what we're here totalk to you about today, is we
want to tell you exactly why youshould go ahead and just move to
the new city, town, place,island, boat, village, wherever
you want to go.
You should do it because we stopourselves.
(11:24):
We.
That's a condition of humansuffering.
We stop ourselves, we sellourselves short, and we like get
in these patterns in a placethat we're so familiar with that
we just don't leave.
And then I think when we dothat, we never I'll just speak
for me.
It took me, I didn't even knowthat I necessarily wanted to
(11:45):
move for a long time because itdidn't seem possible.
We just get so stuck, not evenstuck, we just get so
conditioned in our familiarplace that we start to think
that it's the only place.
Yeah.
And so that's why it seemsscary.
How will you get a job inanother place?
Well, because there's literallyjobs everywhere, everywhere.
(12:08):
Yeah.
Britt (12:16):
I don't know.
I don't know.
I didn't finish college, so I'mnot sure if that is a job or
not.
They teach you that in
Lindsey (12:20):
college, right?
I think that's one of theclasses.
Are scientists real?
Well, I think you can takescientist in college.
Oh, yeah.
Britt (12:26):
Good.
Yeah, so
Lindsey (12:28):
it must be real.
Yeah, I think one of my friendstook scientist.
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You are so worthy.
There's jobs everywhere.
There's money everywhere.
There's friends everywhere,there's houses everywhere, and
yeah, we just get stuck in wherewe are.
So we don't think that, thatthere's any world, like our
(15:27):
bubble gets so small thatthere's no world outside of
where we live.
And there's people who travel alot that maybe they feel a
little bit differently aboutthat.
But I still think that there canbe a disconnect between, Oh, I
can actually go live somewhereelse.
And some people, I guess, justdon't want to.
But even then, I wonder.
Britt (15:48):
I've been describing it as Stockholm Syndrome.
Why?
Like, I felt trapped in Texas.
And, you know, like when you goto school.
You root for your school.
Why?
You don't like your school.
Probably.
You don't like school, butthat's your team.
Oh, it's just supposed to, it'singrained into you.
Like, yeah, that's your team,man.
(16:09):
Yeah.
I love Texas because I'm fromTexas.
It's part of me.
Really?
Like, what is it?
Tell me about what, what of itis a part of you and how
important that is, uh, to, andhow you can't find those things
elsewhere.
Lindsey (16:23):
Yeah.
Um, there's two things I want tosay about that.
First is it's interesting tothink about the, um, like.
tribal communal aspect thatwould make someone not want to
leave that's like ingrained inour DNA from thousands of years,
that would not make you want toleave your group necessarily,
which is an interesting thing tothink about.
(16:43):
But also we just live in thistime where you can still be
connected to your group.
And.
If there's also got to be thispart of us that comes along that
is nomadic.
Right.
So we've cut off the nomadicpart for the last, I don't know,
700, not even that, just a fewhundred years, maybe when things
(17:06):
started really like.
Getting industrialized, maybepeople stop traveling around for
food and stuff.
And yet there is this like,communal element that is
ingrained in us.
You know, because I don't wantto like sell community short,
because it's actually one of themost important things to me,
like friendship and community.
But as I, when I left my like,long friendships, not that
(17:28):
they're over, but when I lefttheir general direct vicinity,
then...
They do sort of shift, but thisspace, they do, they definitely
shift, and yet there's stillthis space for new community, or
a more rich community, or it'slike your community just
actually opens up.
Britt (17:49):
Right, yeah, you're just adding to your community, and I
will say, after moving andstarting to find a new
community, You look back at yourold community and you can see
maybe some toxic relationshipsor maybe relationships where you
weren't fulfilled or fulfillingthe other
Lindsey (18:05):
people.
Right, man, that can be hard to,it's like hard to even admit
that there are relationshipsthat kind of like needed to run
the course.
And maybe when you move, theycan like, you have that space to
where they can move, but it'skind of like.
Leaving the nest eventuallyyou're going to be an adult and
(18:26):
you're going to leave yourparents house and your community
is going to expand in adifferent way and you're going
to have a different kind ofrelationship with your parents
and like that probably needs tohappen with some front like long
standing friendships to thatthey just need to shift and the
right ones can have space.
Like, the right ones can havespace in not only proximity, but
(18:46):
also, like, space in how oftenyou talk to each other, and it's
still gonna feel legit.
And then other ones can justfall off, and that's fine.
Right.
Let's let things end.
Yeah.
When they need to
Britt (19:00):
end.
And it's not only the otherpeople.
I've, I've learned.
That I'm changing.
I'm getting rid of my toxicpatterns, too, you know, when
I'm not there stuck in the sameSituation I've been in for years
talking to the same people Justfilling time saying things.
I gotta do maybe those thingsdidn't need to be
Lindsey (19:21):
said
Britt (19:23):
Uh, I mean, I just got into the pattern where I felt
like I had my base stories, soI'm sitting there at work, new
people are around, I tell thesame stories, because like, Oh,
this is my collection of storiesthat might be interesting to
other people to fill space whereno one's talking, and then I
would just get bored withmyself, right?
(19:45):
And coming here.
I guess those stories are stillthere, but I'm coming up with
new things, I'm, there's newfriendships, I'm learning more
about other people
Lindsey (19:56):
now, you know?
So do you think being around newpeople, you recycle the same old
stories?
Or do you think you, that waspart of like situationally, just
like that was work Brit?
I think that was
Britt (20:08):
work Brit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And some of the stories, yeah,were good and I kept them, but
uh.
Lindsey (20:15):
So you're just, you're just uh, on tour.
Right.
Britt (20:19):
Yeah.
Last night I was hanging outwith one of my new friends,
Nate.
And we were talking about, andthis might be an example, about
how in the cities we were frombefore, he's from Chicago, we're
from Fort Worth, how ourfriends, along with us, were
kind of drinking every day for,what, to forget about the bad
(20:40):
weather.
Or, you know, whatever it was.
Like, the numbness of being inthe same place forever.
And just the culture of thosecities, or those scenes that we
were in, where you're just,you're going out to drink.
You're at dinner, you're gonnahave some beers.
You go home, you have somebeers.
And then you realize one day, ohmy gosh, I'm drinking every day.
And I wake up feeling shitty.
(21:01):
Uh, the new town that we bothlive in, California, here in
California.
The town called California.
The town called California.
Have you heard of it?
California.
There's not the drinkingculture, at least in the people
that we've met.
Yeah.
And especially in LA, people aregetting up, doing their job,
trying to do their job well,staying present, and really,
(21:23):
like, working.
And I didn't see that in thetowns or the circles that I was
in before as much.
Like here, he is sober and isnever pressured to drink.
You know?
Like it never happens.
At home, if I wasn't drinking,somebody would be like, Wait, do
you want to just have a drink?
Dude, we have all these beershere.
(21:44):
Really?
You know what I mean?
Lindsey (21:45):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or there'd be a question oflike, are you drinking right
now?
Are you not?
Britt (21:50):
Right.
Yeah.
That you would have to answer.
And it's like, Oh, I don't know.
I don't, I don't have a beer inmy hand.
So yeah, I guess I'm notdrinking.
You know, there would just belike a, an awkward situation
here.
It's not even, and I don't knowif that's just us being older,
but everyone that I've talked tohere kind of feels the same way
Lindsey (22:09):
about it.
Yeah, you know, I'm interestedin that because it makes me
wonder, it just makes me wonderabout like, it feels awkward
only because you're showing upto an audition.
To, we'll call it an oldsituation in a new way.
So if you're with your oldfriend, and I'm like using air
quotes as I say this, so itdon't mean old friends, like
(22:29):
they're gross or they'rewhatever, they're old, but like
you're showing up to an oldsituation, a familiar, let's say
familiar situation in a new way.
So you show up with friends thatyou used to drink with and you
don't drink and there issomething like there's a new
threshold that needs to becrossed.
because you're showing updifferent.
And I went through that.
(22:50):
I don't want to say itnecessarily felt, it definitely
felt like undertone ofawkwardness because I don't
know.
I guess I didn't realize howmuch someone else would depend
on me drinking or not to likedefine their experience for the
(23:11):
night.
Right.
And I'm also saying that andunderstanding I'm putting way
too much.
Like, it's not like they had abad time because I didn't drink,
that's ridiculous, but even justthe fact that it would, like,
come up and be a question,you're showing up in a new way
and that makes someone go like,oh, well, if you're showing,
like, are you the same personthat I know?
(23:31):
Are you my friend?
Because my friend does this andthis and this.
And if you don't do this andthis and this, then are you that
person or are you an imposter?
Right.
Are you someone else?
Britt (23:42):
Right.
And maybe really what it is isif you're not drinking, maybe
they're feeling a little guilty.
Like, should I be drinking?
Am I, are we just used todrinking together?
Lindsey (23:52):
Right, right.
And that's on that.
That's their own journey.
They need to figure out because,I mean, I stopped drinking
because hell yeah, I didn't needto be drinking.
You know, it was totally acrutch and.
It was just time.
So I don't know if someone'shaving that experience and they
can have every feel again, allyour feelings are welcome here.
(24:13):
You can have every feeling youwant and you can drink as much
or as little as you want.
All of you is welcome here.
But if that experience is comingup for someone where they're
like, Oh, should I be like, notdrinking is drinking bad, then
that's something they are.
So welcome to Explore, or not.
Keep pounding them away, baby.
Britt (24:34):
Get to the lake,
Lindsey (24:34):
baby.
So, one of the reasons that youshould move to a new city, you,
yes, the person listening tothis, I'm talking to each one of
you, move, is that the world isso big and so beautiful, and I
know we've talked a lot aboutthis when it comes to travel,
but the world is so big, andwhen we live in the same place
(24:57):
We forget that all of this worldis happening outside of our
bubble, that we have no idea.
And I am a person who would callmyself, I'm like very open, like
I understand that there's allpeople in all walks of life
doing all kinds of things and Iwelcome it.
(25:19):
Still, and I'm well, like we'repretty well traveled, at least
extensively well traveled in theU.
S.
and like, you know, CentralAmerica, whatever, but until we
went to other countries far awayor spent a lot of time in
places, was I really like, Oh.
Like these are full peopleeverywhere in the world doing
full ass things that I just, mymind was so stuck in a small
(25:43):
bubble, right?
And that's why you just have toget out.
And I say that as someone whodidn't move away from their city
until they were 40.
So that's interesting because Istayed for a long time and I
stayed for a lot longer than.
what I even thought I would orwanted to.
(26:05):
In some timeline, right now,there is a me who moved away
from Texas when she's, she was19, or 22, or whatever.
That me exists somewhere, andsomewhere there's a timeline
when you did.
Right.
And somewhere there's a timelinewhere, when we met, we were
like, let's get the hell out ofhere.
Yeah.
And we just moved.
(26:26):
And.
We're not in that timeline.
I know we're in this timelinewhere we chose to stay and it's
perfect.
Like life also will deal usthese perfect cards where we
move when we need to, buteverything could be different if
we would have just heeded thatcall when we felt that years
ago.
(26:46):
Right.
And for me, that really is thatI didn't even think it was
possible.
Probably from the time I was,like, 20, when we got, I guess,
when we got married.
So, like, 24 until maybe I was,like, 38.
I didn't never, I never thoughtof moving from Fort Worth.
Like, I think I was probablyactively against it in my mind.
(27:08):
Like, other people would moveand I'd be like, no.
Don't move.
Talk about, talk about a newperson or a person showing up in
a new way.
If someone moved, I would belike, what are they doing?
They're making a mistake.
Same.
And that's so small mind.
Obviously, I was like so stuckin my own wounded pattern of
needing that familiarity, youknow, so I couldn't, they
(27:30):
couldn't move.
If they move, what does that sayabout this
Britt (27:33):
place?
Yeah.
Example, everyone for a whilewas moving to Denver and still
are.
People love Denver.
And, um, I never wanted to go toDenver because I was like, you
stole all my friends.
Screw you, Denver.
Lindsey (27:45):
I also, man, the side note, but I just didn't vibe
with Denver.
I think I only went there onetime and it was in a weird point
in my life.
Um, nothing was really for meand people love Denver.
Yeah.
I
Britt (27:57):
still, I still don't vibe with Denver either, but um,
yeah.
Not just because she stole my
Lindsey (28:02):
friends.
But there is a, yeah, it's likewhen people are going and doing
new things, and you feel so, Idon't want to say stuck, but you
just feel so in a place that youcan't leave.
It can, it's like these littleminor heartbreaks and without
some inner work and somepersonal work, I didn't know
(28:26):
that that's what it was.
I had no idea.
I was just like, Oh, they're,they shouldn't move and had
nothing, had no time to likeintrospect and be like, what's
that?
Why am I feeling that way?
When you move to a new place,your creativity gets sparked.
Because, when you're in afamiliar place, especially when
(28:47):
you've been there for years,you're just kind of running,
there's a potential to run onautopilot.
It's the same roads.
It's the same place.
It's the same restaurant.
It's the same this.
It's the same that.
And that running on thisautopilot gets these patterns
deeper ingrained.
But when you go somewhere new,your subconscious is more open
(29:08):
because you have to payattention more.
So then that's when creativitystarts to come in more.
Right.
Britt (29:14):
There were so many times I feel like I didn't notice all
the things around me that wereworth noticing because I had
driven that way a thousand timesto work or whatever.
And when I put myself in a newsituation, everything was new
and I was looking everywhere.
And there is.
It's definitely some work to bedone throughout that of
(29:35):
mindfulness and staying present.
But it can become hard whenyou're in the same routine every
day.
You've got to try harder.
Lindsey (29:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm glad you said thatbecause yeah, it does like it,
it definitely gives you anopportunity to just be more
aware where you are and youdon't want to fall into some
pattern unless you do of like,you're constantly chasing the
high.
of being aware, or like,sparking creativity because it
can happen anywhere, but it'salso okay to go somewhere new to
(30:09):
let it happen.
Right,
Britt (30:10):
right.
And that reminds me of, I willprobably botch this story, but
there was a Ram Dass talk wherehe was talking about, you know,
you and your friend are drivingthrough a town, right?
And you realize that your car iskind of acting up a little bit.
It's maybe skipping orsomething.
And your friend that's sittingnext to you is very hungry.
So as you're going down thismain street in this town, you're
(30:33):
having, you're basically livingin two different realities
because you're looking at everycar shop along the way thinking,
should I stop?
Should I have this checked out?
I don't know.
That's all you're noticing whenyour friend is hungry.
They're just looking at everyrestaurant and you're in the
same place living in twodifferent worlds.
And that was a really potentstory.
Lindsey (30:53):
To me.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
I really like that.
And you can be living in thesame place and kind of, and
living the shared reality too.
When you go to a new place andpeople are maybe more into
creativity or they're more intolike making things happen or
they're more into nature, thenyou might naturally Be kind of
(31:14):
pulled into that shared reality,you know, it's like both can be
true.
You can be living So you can bedriving down the down the
interstate in Fort Worth forexample and think this is really
ugly and someone else can belike look at all these beautiful
wildflowers and Then I'm likedamn Notice those because I was
too busy thinking it was ugly,right?
(31:38):
Yet collectively, like aspeople, we are like putting,
we're putting out and taking inthis energy into wherever we
are.
So, if the energy is more...
Like it is here.
There might be people that aremore into being together, to
like having awareness.
(31:59):
They're more into cultivatingtheir like spiritual awareness
or even more into like takingcare of the earth a little bit
better.
Little things, you know, thatyou can kind of feel like, oh,
okay, we're on the same page andyou can feel the difference when
you're not, when you'resomewhere where that doesn't
feel true.
(32:19):
Young people, especially, shouldjust move.
Like, today, when I think about,like, the 19 year old me or the
22 year old me, for whateverreason, I didn't move even
though I wanted to move toPhilly or New York or whatever,
and I just didn't, I'm like,what was stopping me?
What was keeping me?
(32:40):
What keeps young people in thesame place?
What do you think that was foryou?
Britt (32:46):
Oh man, for me it was just, I think I was scared, like
I was scared to drive out oftown.
Like I, there was just a vibe inmy house of don't do new things.
No one in my family ever did newthings.
Stay with what's known.
And I want to say comfortable,but comfortable is not the right
word because it
Lindsey (33:05):
wasn't comfortable.
Well, but it's so the familiaruncomfortable is easier for us
to handle than the comfortableunfamiliar.
So even if something's better,but it's new to us and we don't
exactly know how to get there,then we will choose the familiar
uncomfortable over what isunfamiliar, but could
(33:27):
potentially be way morecomfortable.
Right.
And we are obsessed, it's likewe're obsessed with feeling
comfortable.
So your family was like buildingthis comfort, this like
dysfunctional comfort.
I'm not like, that's no judgmenton your family.
My family was doing it too, butwe're building this
dysfunctional comfort just so wecan like make it through the day
(33:49):
without actually having toaccess real feelings.
And if you never have toactually feel what you're
feeling, then you can just likefucking watch Wheel of Fortune
and drink Coronas.
I don't even know that.
I don't even know someone whodoes those two things.
Everyone.
That sounds great, actually.
But you can do those thingsbecause you're like, just numb
(34:14):
enough to stay away from yourfeelings.
But just on enough to keepfunctioning, you know
Britt (34:21):
getting through the day.
Wow.
Yeah, and And we've all done itfor sure.
I still do it some days.
Yeah, I have to work throughthat.
Yeah That's crazy to thinkabout.
Yeah, if you ever feel likeyou're just making it through
the day there's work to be donehelp to be
Lindsey (34:38):
had yeah, and truly the first step and it is so
uncomfortable is just saying Ifeel Shitty.
And getting in there and lettingit, letting yourself feel it,
but we constantly are going fromthing to thing, distraction,
(34:58):
distraction, distraction,distraction, to just keep us
away from one feeling because wethink that that feeling is too
much.
And it is not true.
You holding it for like 40 yearsor whatever, for how long?
For 20 years, even for a year,you're holding this feeling in.
And that is so much moreuncomfortable and so much more
(35:19):
weight and energy used than ifyou would just sit down for like
15 minutes with a person, if youneed a person or on your own, if
you have like good practices.
at your disposal and feeling it.
Let me feel this.
But that's what keeps us in thesame, in the same place is the
(35:42):
avoidance.
My experience growing up, I grewup in the same house my entire
life from when I was born untilI was 19.
And People would say, like, Ieven thought, oh, that's
amazing.
When I was younger, I was like,that's so cool.
Lived in the same house my wholelife.
And for a lot of, there's a lotof people that that can be a
great experience.
(36:02):
But for me, it was actually alot of suffering because no one
was happy there.
No one was happy living in thathouse, and we stayed there
because it was Comfort morecomfortable to stay there and
avoid than it would be to say,Let's get the fuck out of here.
(36:23):
But imagine as parents, thepower that that has when we take
responsibility for our feelingsOr for our even dreams, like
feeling, a feeling side, whatabout if you have a dream that
you actually just commit to andsay, let's try to live in a new
(36:43):
place.
So many people that we talk tothat are parents, especially
parents ask us like, Oh, well, Iwant to move, but, or they'll
say, I want to move somewhere.
I know I want to move away, butI know I want to wait until my
kids are out of high school.
Or, I know I want to wait untilthey're this age because of the
(37:03):
X, Y, and Z.
And that's actually a fineintention if it's a pure
intention, but if you're, but ifyou don't have a hold of really
good read on what you also, likewhat your dream is also, then
you are selling your kids short.
(37:24):
Because they can feel the energyof not doing something.
They can feel the lack offulfillment in the house.
You know, I know I felt that inmy house.
Like, you can just, I didn'teven, I mean, I had no idea
that's what I was feeling untillooking back.
And I'm like, oh, like, no onewas fulfilled.
(37:44):
Okay.
That's actually greatinformation because now I can be
like, what fulfills me?
But we just don't really thinkabout that as parents, or
fulfillment gets turned intojob.
Fulfillment just becomes money.
And if I can, like, create a bigbusiness, then I am fulfilled,
(38:05):
but it's so just one slice ofthis pie.
Totally
Britt (38:08):
feel the same about that.
Lindsey (38:10):
And that's why, as parents, for me, like, my, one
of my most important parenting.
Values is possibility.
So I don't care what my kids sayto me.
This is a little off topic frommoving, but I feel like it's in
line.
Like, if my kids are like, I'mgonna invent something or I'm
(38:30):
gonna invent this new thing.
I'm gonna start, uh, whatever.
I wanna fly.
I'm trying to fly.
Literally, they're, one of ourkids says like, I really need
this so I can fly.
And I'm just like, hell yeah.
Do it.
Because instilling possibilityin my kids is one of my number
(38:50):
one values.
It helps me remember my ownpossibility when things get
really limited.
And that's why we, that's whyyou should move somewhere.
Because it opens up that, yourwindow.
Your window's closed topossibility if you're in the
same place and you don't want tobe.
Open it up and be like, there'sa big ass world out here.
The thing about moving as afamily, not only is there
(39:13):
possibility, of course, there'salso new challenges, but that,
like, gives you that stretchygrowth that you can work with,
especially if you have some kindof personal practice or
whatever, you know, some kind ofself awareness practice that
(39:33):
It's good to be challenged.
When you move, you're going tobe challenged.
No matter if you're 19 or 22 or40 and no matter if you're
moving by yourself or movingwith a whole family, you're
going to be challenged becauseit's like so cliche, but
wherever you go, there you are.
So you can like leave your oldcity, your old people, but
you're bringing your baggagewith you.
(39:54):
The good thing is if you'reopen.
A curious seeker kind of person.
That's exciting because you'relike, oh, this is like a brand
new opportunity for me to shedsome shit that I was still
holding on to where I was.
I think you're
Britt (40:07):
just going to shed it by default as you go to.
You think so?
Yeah, to some extent.
Absolutely.
Because you're not stuck in thesame situation.
You're not seeing the samepeople.
Just like I was saying with mystories, they just kind of
melted away.
And then now I'm in situationswhere I feel like, Oh, I don't
have much to say.
And it's because I'm not justregurgitating the same shit that
(40:29):
was this facade, you know, thisego thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now that I'm not on that tripanymore, I'm building a new me
and learning how to communicate
Lindsey (40:41):
with people.
Yeah.
So what is building a new you?
Britt (40:46):
I'm still figuring it out every day, talking to new
people, figuring out what I'mpassionate about, you know, when
I'm out of it, what I miss andputting it all back together.
Lindsey (40:58):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because when we're in the sameplace, we, we just default to
this, like, Person that we areknown to be and there's doesn't
leave a lot of room forexploration of what you actually
like or what you actually wantto do because you're just like,
well, this is let me put on my.
(41:20):
My Lindsay suit today and beLindsay and all right.
It's all good.
I'm going to keep being Lindsay.
Let me do exactly what everyoneexpects.
But when you're in a new place,you have that freedom.
That is also a challenge.
And, and it doesn't always workfor people to move like people
move back or they, or they movesomewhere else.
That's another interesting thingthat I, I like about thinking
(41:45):
about alignment because we thinkyeah.
There can be a tendency to thinkthat when things are in
alignment, it will all be smoothand easy, and that's not true.
Like, a lot of alignment willrequire discomfort, because you
have to, if you're growing, ifyou're expanding, or you're
like, learning who you reallyare and ripping off the facade,
(42:06):
You're gonna meet an edge thatis uncomfortable, that is
discomfort, and you really haveto expand into that and see
who's really there, not the madeup person that was accepted in
the town you lived in before, orthe relationships, or the
(42:27):
friendships, or whatever, thecommunity that you'd been in for
a long time, but like, who am,who am I really when I'm meeting
this edge when there's like noone else to be for but you
Britt (42:38):
and I'm working through that right now.
It actually came up last week.
Lindsay and I were in a circletalking with people and you
know, we'd pass around a featheror whatever and whoever had it
could just speak about anythingthat was on their mind and
everyone else just listened.
And it seemed like kind of thetheme for everyone was ego.
(43:00):
Everyone was kind of workingthrough an ego thing at the
moment.
And it really brought up my ownawareness of what my ego trip is
right now, leaving Fort Worth,where I knew everybody either
through music, Or through therestaurant or whatever there was
always I knew everybody throughsomething, you know, that's what
(43:22):
my vision of myself was That'swhat my ego was.
These are the things that I doand that's why I know people and
that's who I am Right.
So when we decided to go on thistrip, I was like fuck.
Yeah, I get to get rid of my egoLet's do this and a lot of times
it's felt great.
And then there's sometimes whereI'm sitting here and I'm like
Out and there's cool peoplearound and I'm like, none of
(43:45):
these people know who I am andsometimes that feels great and
sometimes that's like, Oh, whatall these achievements that I
had that no one knows about werethey even achievements?
What was I feeling?
You know, did it?
Was that really something I didfor me?
Was that really something I didto impress people?
What of those things do I stilllove?
(44:07):
What still fulfills me?
And how do I keep doing that anddo it for me and not for my ego?
Mm
Lindsey (44:14):
hmm.
Mm.
That's so good.
Yeah, we do.
We just, we do things to put ona show.
And
Britt (44:23):
I've always felt like I knew who I was, you know?
I'm like, I've always had astrong sense of self.
You know, and now I'm realizing,like, what, how much of that
was, was me and how much of itwas just the story.
Mm hmm.
Lindsey (44:37):
Yeah.
Yeah.
So what does moving to a newplace then, what does that give
you in terms of that?
Well, I
Britt (44:46):
get to start over and, and like I said, feel out what.
What was important to me, whatdoes make me happy, and what was
just the story to impress peopleto make more friends.
So now when I'm talking topeople, I'm like, I don't know
these people, all of myreferences of my achievements
from a far away place don'ttranslate over here, so I can't,
(45:07):
I'm not even using thosereferences.
And I have to learn how tocommunicate with people again
now.
Lindsey (45:12):
Mmm.
Yeah, so it's communicating withpeople on a level that's more
than just, what do you do?
Britt (45:21):
Right.
It's, we're not just dorking outover obscure microphones or
whatever, you know?
I'm just talking, I'm justtrying to relate to people as
another human and not some weirdlike microphone encyclopedia.
You know what I mean?
Not really.
You But I'm think that's just anexample of the weird thing, you
(45:42):
know?
Yeah.
Just like me, just being sohyper obsessed with one thing
and hanging out with people thatwere obsessed with that
Lindsey (45:48):
thing.
Got it.
Got it.
Yeah.
You know, I still like, hold onto my old stories because I
think it, I, because some partof me thinks I need it to like
place me in the world of why Iam, it's like, why I'm valuable.
And I think that's why we all dolittle things like that, but
(46:10):
where I'll be like, say, Oh, Iused to own a restaurant and
it's like, that was so long ago.
Might as well have been, mightas well never happened.
It's like, what do you, yeah.
What do you do now?
What are you into now?
Even saying like, well, we camefrom Texas, when people ask
like, where are you from?
It feels like there needs to bethis whole story.
(46:31):
And I, every time I'm like, whydo I need to tell this story?
I don't really.
Same here.
I'm glad you feel that way too.
That's me just saying like, oh,but we've been traveling and
this and that.
And I don't think that'snecessary.
And maybe it is.
I don't know.
It's another paradox becausewe...
(46:52):
me, but I think this is true fora we, that we love connection.
And so when I meet someone, Iwant to know, like, I want to
know about you.
But maybe really knowing aboutyou isn't knowing that you were
born in wherever.
Maybe really knowing about youis like, what do you love?
Like, what kind of, you know,what, what art do you love?
(47:16):
What do you like?
Love in nature and what makesyou laugh and I wonder how to
like build a this is me storyLike, what do you do story out
of those things?
Yeah, like I used to own arestaurant and I'm from Fort
Worth but then I've beentraveling and now I live here
but I've only been here for amonth and like that becomes my
(47:36):
kind of Default story to likeplace me in the world.
I also think that is that we dothat to be like, Oh, I'm a safe
person.
Don't worry.
I didn't like roll off a train.
I'm not a weirdo.
Like my brain still will belike, what if people think that
you're like some transientweirdo, carny person.
(47:57):
I don't know.
Sorry.
Cut out that if you're notsupposed to say carny person,
people that work at carnivals,people that work at carnivals.
And you know what?
They're, we need them.
Britt (48:08):
I still feel like sometimes when I'm in a store
that everyone's looking at methinking I'm about to steal
something.
Yeah, yeah.
What the fuck is that?
I think a lot of people probablyfeel that.
Yeah, but it's like
Lindsey (48:18):
a low level, there's no way it's just you, but it's like
a low level questioning yourself worth, like I don't deserve
to be here.
Mm.
You know?
Interesting.
Yeah.
And yeah, so it's, it's inter,it's, it's definitely not
something to ignore.
I mean, it's just a silly littletrick that our mind plays on us,
but it is, it is a trick thatsays, I'm not supposed to be
(48:41):
here at, on some level, and thatyou're questioning whether I'm
supposed to be here.
So it's a way that we.
It's a way that we people pleasein these like micro ways.
Like, let me just micro turn onmy whatever ness so you know
that I'm not a thief stealingfrom your store.
(49:04):
And it is people pleasingbecause first of all, they don't
think that.
And second of all, the fact thatI need to turn on even some
ounce of something unconsciouslymeans that I am trying to.
Manipulate how they feel aboutme.
So that's why you should move soyou can be a complete weirdo
(49:24):
somewhere else.
A neurotic weirdo.
Go live in New York.
Be a neurotic weirdo andeveryone will love it.
Britt (49:33):
or la There's plenty of us here too.
Lindsey (49:37):
Yeah.
Um, that's just the way we'reall human and I think.
That that's important to knowthat we all have those feelings
and that you should still move.
You should move.
Everyone should move.
Do it.
Move once in your life.
Just get, get out of there.
If you're not young, then do itold.
Just do it.
Britt (49:54):
Yeah.
Bye bye.
Lindsey (49:55):
Bye.
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode of
Can We Start Over Podcast.
My name is Brit.
And I
Lindsey (00:21):
am Lindsay.
Thank
Britt (00:23):
you for being here.
You may notice that we sound waybetter than we used
Lindsey (00:26):
to.
That's because we got a brandnew fancy bansy setup.
Britt (00:31):
Yeah, now that we're still and we're in one place
Lindsey (00:34):
for a while.
Yeah, this would be such a painin the ass to pack and travel
with only three suitcases andfive people.
There's no
Britt (00:42):
way.
Yeah, most of the other episodeswere recorded all in different
places.
With this tiny setup that wouldfit in a small bag.
So now I'm glad to have like aquality setup in a place where
we can just walk over and hitrecord.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lindsey (00:55):
It feels really good.
Yeah.
If you are new here, we're soglad you're here.
Thank you for listening.
I'm Lindsay.
This is Brit.
You already heard that, but weare a married couple who decided
to sell our house, sell all ofour stuff, take our three kids
on a trip around the world tofind a new home.
And along the way, we startedtalking to people who started
(01:17):
over in their own amazing ways.
So that's what you're listeningto.
Our starting over story, otherpeople's starting over stories.
Hopefully it sparks someinspiration for you to start
over.
Cause I bet I'd be willing tobet.
I'm just going to go ahead andbet that there is something that
you want to do in your life thatmaybe you're not ready to do or
(01:39):
you think, I don't know, could Ido it?
And you can.
So hopefully you're herelistening to our story and other
stories to get that inspirationand know that you can start
over.
Today we are talking about Inessence of starting over, why
you should move to a new city,or a new place, or a new town, a
village, or a boat.
(02:01):
Just move somewhere.
Britt (02:03):
You may think that's weird, but just listen, okay?
Just listen through.
It'll make sense by the end.
We have so many reasons why thatis what's next for you.
Lindsey (02:11):
We wanted to talk about it because we didn't move out of
our hometowns other than justfive miles, 20 miles away within
the same area until we were 40.
And It's amazing that it tookthat much time and effort for us
to move when we both wanted to.
(02:32):
So that's what we get intotoday.
Why you should move.
If you have a calling to aplace, I hope that you listen to
this and then you take the nextstep to go there.
And
Britt (02:42):
now we've got some really exciting news for you.
Lindsey (02:44):
When we started this podcasting journey, people kept
asking us, how do you do this?
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I have this great idea, but Ijust don't know how to do it.
Or I have a podcast, but it'skind of fizzled out.
I don't pay attention to itanymore because it's too much to
keep up with.
I don't know how to edit.
I don't know how to put it outthere.
So we are introducing to youright.
(03:05):
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(03:26):
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(04:59):
something new and that everyonehas a story worth telling.
Get in touch with us today andlet's embark on this podcasting
adventure together.
Email rightkindpodcasting atgmail.
com or find the link in the shownotes and let's get started.
We want to hear your story.
Britt (05:20):
Book a free clarity session with us today so we can
talk about your ideas and makethem a reality.
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com.
Lindsey (05:28):
This is a great episode.
I'm excited for everyone to hearit.
It was really good to connectwith you, Brit.
It's been a minute since we justsat down and chatted and it
feels amazing every time we doit.
It really does.
Britt (05:40):
All right, let's do it.
Why do your eyes do
Lindsey (05:46):
that?
Why do your eyes, why are theyable to cross?
Uh,
Britt (05:50):
cause maybe sometimes you need to see, I don't know,
your
Lindsey (05:54):
nose.
Because you can't go them out,you can't go them outwards,
Britt (06:00):
is that how you say it?
You can't go them outwards,
Lindsey (06:03):
But that's where you need to see is out because maybe
you need to see there's likesomething happening on the left,
like a ninja is coming for youand on the right you still want
to watch your shows.
Right.
So like you need your eyes to gothem out, but you can't go on,
but you can only go on in.
Hmm.
(06:23):
Huh.
Are we finding, like, the fatalflaw of
Britt (06:27):
humans?
Eye stuff?
Yeah.
Of eye stuff.
Fatal flaw
Lindsey (06:31):
of eye stuff?
No, no, just of humans ingeneral.
If we could fix that, thenthey're probably...
We could probably cureeverything.
Mmm.
What do you think about that?
Thoughts on, thoughts on curingeverything, go.
Britt (06:43):
Mmm.
Ooh, I think we need bad thingsto kill people, right?
Isn't that what scientists say?
I don't
Lindsey (06:50):
know if that's what scientists say, but it's
definitely a lot ofspirituality.
Not, not that you need badthings to kill people.
That's not like necessarily aspirit.
Britt (06:58):
Well, they have to die.
There's not enough
Lindsey (07:00):
room for everyone.
Yeah.
We get so caught up in like thegood and the bad that really on
this longer trajectory, what isgood and bad.
And also maybe if bad stuffdidn't happen, then after like a
week we in our like holiness ofnothing bad happening, we'd
probably just get really bored.
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
(07:21):
There has to be some kind ofsuffering baked in, but
sometimes I still have a problemwith that man.
Because like, there's thissuffering that we like, that we
all kind of think of when it'slike, oh yeah, suffering, or
even someone's sick orsomething, but then there's
like, horrible suffering thatI'm like, does that need to, do
we need that too?
I don't, I don't know.
But I think that's like, maybealso the, I don't know, the
(07:45):
human condition just.
Amplified that causes greatersuffering that is unneeded like
we definitely don't need that.
Yeah, you know, but we have itSo that's like we're like we
came to this Earthly plane ashumans with some amount of
suffering But we're so stuck inthe humanness that we like
(08:06):
create this deeper Deeper deeperwell of suffering that we don't
even need God.
And so we just have toincrementally turn it back away
from the unneeded suffering.
Wow.
Do what we can like little bylittle.
I think I, I think we did justsolve it, right?
Britt (08:26):
I think so.
I think now, now you shouldwrite a book on that.
Lindsey (08:28):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Turning, turning it backincrementally.
Yeah.
And yeah, so much of sufferingthough, when you look at it as
like yawn.
Britt (08:39):
Yawn.
Yeah.
We.
Hold on just a sec.
You can be bummed about how thecomputer just stopped recording
and we lost.
Yeah.
There's suffering.
A good bit of that.
There's suffering.
I'm suffering
Lindsey (08:49):
a bit over this.
I'm like, what did I say?
Oh.
And that's a really good exampleof like suffering that is.
It's such a paradox because it'slike meaningless.
And yet also you should be ableto feel the feeling fully.
And when we do that, it takes somuch less time and then it just
(09:10):
like melts away.
So what's the answer?
Britt (09:15):
Oh goodness.
I don't know.
You're the one writing the bookabout it.
Lindsey (09:20):
My book coming out.
Next year about I can't rememberbutter
Britt (09:25):
butter the butter real
Lindsey (09:28):
What do you Like about living in a new city, would you
say you live in a new city?
Oh, I absolutely
Britt (09:37):
would say that Now should we define city?
I don't know.
Would you say you live in a newplace?
I live in a new place Yeah, Ilive in a new place.
That is almost the polaropposite of the old place And
boy, I'm, I'm loving it.
Lindsey (09:53):
What do you think?
Britt (09:55):
Trademark.
Lindsey (09:56):
McDonald's.
They're a sponsor.
Go into any McDonald's right nowand just say Brit's name and
they'll give you a free largefry.
Guaranteed.
Also, none of this isguaranteed.
My guarantee to you, I have asolid guarantee that there is
absolutely no guarantee behindanything I say.
You need to figure out foryourself.
(10:18):
What do you think?
This is.
You're 41.
Sorry to age you.
I'm 30.
I'm 40, I think.
What do you think stopped youfrom moving to a new place,
city, town, village, island,boat before?
Britt (10:39):
Ooh, that sounds like a lot of new opportunities you
just said.
But anyway, back to thequestion, what stopped me
before?
Oh man, fear.
Uh, not having a job or themoney to do it.
Leaving my job.
Leaving my friends.
Yeah.
Having to make new ones.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
(11:00):
And you know what I've figuredout?
I can do all of those things.
Lindsey (11:03):
Right.
Like, literally, it all unfolds.
Perfectly.
And that's what we're here totalk to you about today, is we
want to tell you exactly why youshould go ahead and just move to
the new city, town, place,island, boat, village, wherever
you want to go.
You should do it because we stopourselves.
(11:24):
We.
That's a condition of humansuffering.
We stop ourselves, we sellourselves short, and we like get
in these patterns in a placethat we're so familiar with that
we just don't leave.
And then I think when we dothat, we never I'll just speak
for me.
It took me, I didn't even knowthat I necessarily wanted to
(11:45):
move for a long time because itdidn't seem possible.
We just get so stuck, not evenstuck, we just get so
conditioned in our familiarplace that we start to think
that it's the only place.
Yeah.
And so that's why it seemsscary.
How will you get a job inanother place?
Well, because there's literallyjobs everywhere, everywhere.
(12:08):
Yeah.
Britt (12:16):
I don't know.
I don't know.
I didn't finish college, so I'mnot sure if that is a job or
not.
They teach you that in
Lindsey (12:20):
college, right?
I think that's one of theclasses.
Are scientists real?
Well, I think you can takescientist in college.
Oh, yeah.
Britt (12:26):
Good.
Yeah, so
Lindsey (12:28):
it must be real.
Yeah, I think one of my friendstook scientist.
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You are so worthy.
There's jobs everywhere.
There's money everywhere.
There's friends everywhere,there's houses everywhere, and
yeah, we just get stuck in wherewe are.
So we don't think that, thatthere's any world, like our
(15:27):
bubble gets so small thatthere's no world outside of
where we live.
And there's people who travel alot that maybe they feel a
little bit differently aboutthat.
But I still think that there canbe a disconnect between, Oh, I
can actually go live somewhereelse.
And some people, I guess, justdon't want to.
But even then, I wonder.
Britt (15:48):
I've been describing it as Stockholm Syndrome.
Why?
Like, I felt trapped in Texas.
And, you know, like when you goto school.
You root for your school.
Why?
You don't like your school.
Probably.
You don't like school, butthat's your team.
Oh, it's just supposed to, it'singrained into you.
Like, yeah, that's your team,man.
(16:09):
Yeah.
I love Texas because I'm fromTexas.
It's part of me.
Really?
Like, what is it?
Tell me about what, what of itis a part of you and how
important that is, uh, to, andhow you can't find those things
elsewhere.
Lindsey (16:23):
Yeah.
Um, there's two things I want tosay about that.
First is it's interesting tothink about the, um, like.
tribal communal aspect thatwould make someone not want to
leave that's like ingrained inour DNA from thousands of years,
that would not make you want toleave your group necessarily,
which is an interesting thing tothink about.
(16:43):
But also we just live in thistime where you can still be
connected to your group.
And.
If there's also got to be thispart of us that comes along that
is nomadic.
Right.
So we've cut off the nomadicpart for the last, I don't know,
700, not even that, just a fewhundred years, maybe when things
(17:06):
started really like.
Getting industrialized, maybepeople stop traveling around for
food and stuff.
And yet there is this like,communal element that is
ingrained in us.
You know, because I don't wantto like sell community short,
because it's actually one of themost important things to me,
like friendship and community.
But as I, when I left my like,long friendships, not that
(17:28):
they're over, but when I lefttheir general direct vicinity,
then...
They do sort of shift, but thisspace, they do, they definitely
shift, and yet there's stillthis space for new community, or
a more rich community, or it'slike your community just
actually opens up.
Britt (17:49):
Right, yeah, you're just adding to your community, and I
will say, after moving andstarting to find a new
community, You look back at yourold community and you can see
maybe some toxic relationshipsor maybe relationships where you
weren't fulfilled or fulfillingthe other
Lindsey (18:05):
people.
Right, man, that can be hard to,it's like hard to even admit
that there are relationshipsthat kind of like needed to run
the course.
And maybe when you move, theycan like, you have that space to
where they can move, but it'skind of like.
Leaving the nest eventuallyyou're going to be an adult and
(18:26):
you're going to leave yourparents house and your community
is going to expand in adifferent way and you're going
to have a different kind ofrelationship with your parents
and like that probably needs tohappen with some front like long
standing friendships to thatthey just need to shift and the
right ones can have space.
Like, the right ones can havespace in not only proximity, but
(18:46):
also, like, space in how oftenyou talk to each other, and it's
still gonna feel legit.
And then other ones can justfall off, and that's fine.
Right.
Let's let things end.
Yeah.
When they need to
Britt (19:00):
end.
And it's not only the otherpeople.
I've, I've learned.
That I'm changing.
I'm getting rid of my toxicpatterns, too, you know, when
I'm not there stuck in the sameSituation I've been in for years
talking to the same people Justfilling time saying things.
I gotta do maybe those thingsdidn't need to be
Lindsey (19:21):
said
Britt (19:23):
Uh, I mean, I just got into the pattern where I felt
like I had my base stories, soI'm sitting there at work, new
people are around, I tell thesame stories, because like, Oh,
this is my collection of storiesthat might be interesting to
other people to fill space whereno one's talking, and then I
would just get bored withmyself, right?
(19:45):
And coming here.
I guess those stories are stillthere, but I'm coming up with
new things, I'm, there's newfriendships, I'm learning more
about other people
Lindsey (19:56):
now, you know?
So do you think being around newpeople, you recycle the same old
stories?
Or do you think you, that waspart of like situationally, just
like that was work Brit?
I think that was
Britt (20:08):
work Brit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And some of the stories, yeah,were good and I kept them, but
uh.
Lindsey (20:15):
So you're just, you're just uh, on tour.
Right.
Britt (20:19):
Yeah.
Last night I was hanging outwith one of my new friends,
Nate.
And we were talking about, andthis might be an example, about
how in the cities we were frombefore, he's from Chicago, we're
from Fort Worth, how ourfriends, along with us, were
kind of drinking every day for,what, to forget about the bad
(20:40):
weather.
Or, you know, whatever it was.
Like, the numbness of being inthe same place forever.
And just the culture of thosecities, or those scenes that we
were in, where you're just,you're going out to drink.
You're at dinner, you're gonnahave some beers.
You go home, you have somebeers.
And then you realize one day, ohmy gosh, I'm drinking every day.
And I wake up feeling shitty.
(21:01):
Uh, the new town that we bothlive in, California, here in
California.
The town called California.
The town called California.
Have you heard of it?
California.
There's not the drinkingculture, at least in the people
that we've met.
Yeah.
And especially in LA, people aregetting up, doing their job,
trying to do their job well,staying present, and really,
(21:23):
like, working.
And I didn't see that in thetowns or the circles that I was
in before as much.
Like here, he is sober and isnever pressured to drink.
You know?
Like it never happens.
At home, if I wasn't drinking,somebody would be like, Wait, do
you want to just have a drink?
Dude, we have all these beershere.
(21:44):
Really?
You know what I mean?
Lindsey (21:45):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or there'd be a question oflike, are you drinking right
now?
Are you not?
Britt (21:50):
Right.
Yeah.
That you would have to answer.
And it's like, Oh, I don't know.
I don't, I don't have a beer inmy hand.
So yeah, I guess I'm notdrinking.
You know, there would just belike a, an awkward situation
here.
It's not even, and I don't knowif that's just us being older,
but everyone that I've talked tohere kind of feels the same way
Lindsey (22:09):
about it.
Yeah, you know, I'm interestedin that because it makes me
wonder, it just makes me wonderabout like, it feels awkward
only because you're showing upto an audition.
To, we'll call it an oldsituation in a new way.
So if you're with your oldfriend, and I'm like using air
quotes as I say this, so itdon't mean old friends, like
(22:29):
they're gross or they'rewhatever, they're old, but like
you're showing up to an oldsituation, a familiar, let's say
familiar situation in a new way.
So you show up with friends thatyou used to drink with and you
don't drink and there issomething like there's a new
threshold that needs to becrossed.
because you're showing updifferent.
And I went through that.
(22:50):
I don't want to say itnecessarily felt, it definitely
felt like undertone ofawkwardness because I don't
know.
I guess I didn't realize howmuch someone else would depend
on me drinking or not to likedefine their experience for the
(23:11):
night.
Right.
And I'm also saying that andunderstanding I'm putting way
too much.
Like, it's not like they had abad time because I didn't drink,
that's ridiculous, but even justthe fact that it would, like,
come up and be a question,you're showing up in a new way
and that makes someone go like,oh, well, if you're showing,
like, are you the same personthat I know?
(23:31):
Are you my friend?
Because my friend does this andthis and this.
And if you don't do this andthis and this, then are you that
person or are you an imposter?
Right.
Are you someone else?
Britt (23:42):
Right.
And maybe really what it is isif you're not drinking, maybe
they're feeling a little guilty.
Like, should I be drinking?
Am I, are we just used todrinking together?
Lindsey (23:52):
Right, right.
And that's on that.
That's their own journey.
They need to figure out because,I mean, I stopped drinking
because hell yeah, I didn't needto be drinking.
You know, it was totally acrutch and.
It was just time.
So I don't know if someone'shaving that experience and they
can have every feel again, allyour feelings are welcome here.
(24:13):
You can have every feeling youwant and you can drink as much
or as little as you want.
All of you is welcome here.
But if that experience is comingup for someone where they're
like, Oh, should I be like, notdrinking is drinking bad, then
that's something they are.
So welcome to Explore, or not.
Keep pounding them away, baby.
Britt (24:34):
Get to the lake,
Lindsey (24:34):
baby.
So, one of the reasons that youshould move to a new city, you,
yes, the person listening tothis, I'm talking to each one of
you, move, is that the world isso big and so beautiful, and I
know we've talked a lot aboutthis when it comes to travel,
but the world is so big, andwhen we live in the same place
(24:57):
We forget that all of this worldis happening outside of our
bubble, that we have no idea.
And I am a person who would callmyself, I'm like very open, like
I understand that there's allpeople in all walks of life
doing all kinds of things and Iwelcome it.
(25:19):
Still, and I'm well, like we'repretty well traveled, at least
extensively well traveled in theU.
S.
and like, you know, CentralAmerica, whatever, but until we
went to other countries far awayor spent a lot of time in
places, was I really like, Oh.
Like these are full peopleeverywhere in the world doing
full ass things that I just, mymind was so stuck in a small
(25:43):
bubble, right?
And that's why you just have toget out.
And I say that as someone whodidn't move away from their city
until they were 40.
So that's interesting because Istayed for a long time and I
stayed for a lot longer than.
what I even thought I would orwanted to.
(26:05):
In some timeline, right now,there is a me who moved away
from Texas when she's, she was19, or 22, or whatever.
That me exists somewhere, andsomewhere there's a timeline
when you did.
Right.
And somewhere there's a timelinewhere, when we met, we were
like, let's get the hell out ofhere.
Yeah.
And we just moved.
(26:26):
And.
We're not in that timeline.
I know we're in this timelinewhere we chose to stay and it's
perfect.
Like life also will deal usthese perfect cards where we
move when we need to, buteverything could be different if
we would have just heeded thatcall when we felt that years
ago.
(26:46):
Right.
And for me, that really is thatI didn't even think it was
possible.
Probably from the time I was,like, 20, when we got, I guess,
when we got married.
So, like, 24 until maybe I was,like, 38.
I didn't never, I never thoughtof moving from Fort Worth.
Like, I think I was probablyactively against it in my mind.
(27:08):
Like, other people would moveand I'd be like, no.
Don't move.
Talk about, talk about a newperson or a person showing up in
a new way.
If someone moved, I would belike, what are they doing?
They're making a mistake.
Same.
And that's so small mind.
Obviously, I was like so stuckin my own wounded pattern of
needing that familiarity, youknow, so I couldn't, they
(27:30):
couldn't move.
If they move, what does that sayabout this
Britt (27:33):
place?
Yeah.
Example, everyone for a whilewas moving to Denver and still
are.
People love Denver.
And, um, I never wanted to go toDenver because I was like, you
stole all my friends.
Screw you, Denver.
Lindsey (27:45):
I also, man, the side note, but I just didn't vibe
with Denver.
I think I only went there onetime and it was in a weird point
in my life.
Um, nothing was really for meand people love Denver.
Yeah.
I
Britt (27:57):
still, I still don't vibe with Denver either, but um,
yeah.
Not just because she stole my
Lindsey (28:02):
friends.
But there is a, yeah, it's likewhen people are going and doing
new things, and you feel so, Idon't want to say stuck, but you
just feel so in a place that youcan't leave.
It can, it's like these littleminor heartbreaks and without
some inner work and somepersonal work, I didn't know
(28:26):
that that's what it was.
I had no idea.
I was just like, Oh, they're,they shouldn't move and had
nothing, had no time to likeintrospect and be like, what's
that?
Why am I feeling that way?
When you move to a new place,your creativity gets sparked.
Because, when you're in afamiliar place, especially when
(28:47):
you've been there for years,you're just kind of running,
there's a potential to run onautopilot.
It's the same roads.
It's the same place.
It's the same restaurant.
It's the same this.
It's the same that.
And that running on thisautopilot gets these patterns
deeper ingrained.
But when you go somewhere new,your subconscious is more open
(29:08):
because you have to payattention more.
So then that's when creativitystarts to come in more.
Right.
Britt (29:14):
There were so many times I feel like I didn't notice all
the things around me that wereworth noticing because I had
driven that way a thousand timesto work or whatever.
And when I put myself in a newsituation, everything was new
and I was looking everywhere.
And there is.
It's definitely some work to bedone throughout that of
(29:35):
mindfulness and staying present.
But it can become hard whenyou're in the same routine every
day.
You've got to try harder.
Lindsey (29:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm glad you said thatbecause yeah, it does like it,
it definitely gives you anopportunity to just be more
aware where you are and youdon't want to fall into some
pattern unless you do of like,you're constantly chasing the
high.
of being aware, or like,sparking creativity because it
can happen anywhere, but it'salso okay to go somewhere new to
(30:09):
let it happen.
Right,
Britt (30:10):
right.
And that reminds me of, I willprobably botch this story, but
there was a Ram Dass talk wherehe was talking about, you know,
you and your friend are drivingthrough a town, right?
And you realize that your car iskind of acting up a little bit.
It's maybe skipping orsomething.
And your friend that's sittingnext to you is very hungry.
So as you're going down thismain street in this town, you're
(30:33):
having, you're basically livingin two different realities
because you're looking at everycar shop along the way thinking,
should I stop?
Should I have this checked out?
I don't know.
That's all you're noticing whenyour friend is hungry.
They're just looking at everyrestaurant and you're in the
same place living in twodifferent worlds.
And that was a really potentstory.
Lindsey (30:53):
To me.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
I really like that.
And you can be living in thesame place and kind of, and
living the shared reality too.
When you go to a new place andpeople are maybe more into
creativity or they're more intolike making things happen or
they're more into nature, thenyou might naturally Be kind of
(31:14):
pulled into that shared reality,you know, it's like both can be
true.
You can be living So you can bedriving down the down the
interstate in Fort Worth forexample and think this is really
ugly and someone else can belike look at all these beautiful
wildflowers and Then I'm likedamn Notice those because I was
too busy thinking it was ugly,right?
(31:38):
Yet collectively, like aspeople, we are like putting,
we're putting out and taking inthis energy into wherever we
are.
So, if the energy is more...
Like it is here.
There might be people that aremore into being together, to
like having awareness.
(31:59):
They're more into cultivatingtheir like spiritual awareness
or even more into like takingcare of the earth a little bit
better.
Little things, you know, thatyou can kind of feel like, oh,
okay, we're on the same page andyou can feel the difference when
you're not, when you'resomewhere where that doesn't
feel true.
(32:19):
Young people, especially, shouldjust move.
Like, today, when I think about,like, the 19 year old me or the
22 year old me, for whateverreason, I didn't move even
though I wanted to move toPhilly or New York or whatever,
and I just didn't, I'm like,what was stopping me?
What was keeping me?
(32:40):
What keeps young people in thesame place?
What do you think that was foryou?
Britt (32:46):
Oh man, for me it was just, I think I was scared, like
I was scared to drive out oftown.
Like I, there was just a vibe inmy house of don't do new things.
No one in my family ever did newthings.
Stay with what's known.
And I want to say comfortable,but comfortable is not the right
word because it
Lindsey (33:05):
wasn't comfortable.
Well, but it's so the familiaruncomfortable is easier for us
to handle than the comfortableunfamiliar.
So even if something's better,but it's new to us and we don't
exactly know how to get there,then we will choose the familiar
uncomfortable over what isunfamiliar, but could
(33:27):
potentially be way morecomfortable.
Right.
And we are obsessed, it's likewe're obsessed with feeling
comfortable.
So your family was like buildingthis comfort, this like
dysfunctional comfort.
I'm not like, that's no judgmenton your family.
My family was doing it too, butwe're building this
dysfunctional comfort just so wecan like make it through the day
(33:49):
without actually having toaccess real feelings.
And if you never have toactually feel what you're
feeling, then you can just likefucking watch Wheel of Fortune
and drink Coronas.
I don't even know that.
I don't even know someone whodoes those two things.
Everyone.
That sounds great, actually.
But you can do those thingsbecause you're like, just numb
(34:14):
enough to stay away from yourfeelings.
But just on enough to keepfunctioning, you know
Britt (34:21):
getting through the day.
Wow.
Yeah, and And we've all done itfor sure.
I still do it some days.
Yeah, I have to work throughthat.
Yeah That's crazy to thinkabout.
Yeah, if you ever feel likeyou're just making it through
the day there's work to be donehelp to be
Lindsey (34:38):
had yeah, and truly the first step and it is so
uncomfortable is just saying Ifeel Shitty.
And getting in there and lettingit, letting yourself feel it,
but we constantly are going fromthing to thing, distraction,
(34:58):
distraction, distraction,distraction, to just keep us
away from one feeling because wethink that that feeling is too
much.
And it is not true.
You holding it for like 40 yearsor whatever, for how long?
For 20 years, even for a year,you're holding this feeling in.
And that is so much moreuncomfortable and so much more
(35:19):
weight and energy used than ifyou would just sit down for like
15 minutes with a person, if youneed a person or on your own, if
you have like good practices.
at your disposal and feeling it.
Let me feel this.
But that's what keeps us in thesame, in the same place is the
(35:42):
avoidance.
My experience growing up, I grewup in the same house my entire
life from when I was born untilI was 19.
And People would say, like, Ieven thought, oh, that's
amazing.
When I was younger, I was like,that's so cool.
Lived in the same house my wholelife.
And for a lot of, there's a lotof people that that can be a
great experience.
(36:02):
But for me, it was actually alot of suffering because no one
was happy there.
No one was happy living in thathouse, and we stayed there
because it was Comfort morecomfortable to stay there and
avoid than it would be to say,Let's get the fuck out of here.
(36:23):
But imagine as parents, thepower that that has when we take
responsibility for our feelingsOr for our even dreams, like
feeling, a feeling side, whatabout if you have a dream that
you actually just commit to andsay, let's try to live in a new
(36:43):
place.
So many people that we talk tothat are parents, especially
parents ask us like, Oh, well, Iwant to move, but, or they'll
say, I want to move somewhere.
I know I want to move away, butI know I want to wait until my
kids are out of high school.
Or, I know I want to wait untilthey're this age because of the
(37:03):
X, Y, and Z.
And that's actually a fineintention if it's a pure
intention, but if you're, but ifyou don't have a hold of really
good read on what you also, likewhat your dream is also, then
you are selling your kids short.
(37:24):
Because they can feel the energyof not doing something.
They can feel the lack offulfillment in the house.
You know, I know I felt that inmy house.
Like, you can just, I didn'teven, I mean, I had no idea
that's what I was feeling untillooking back.
And I'm like, oh, like, no onewas fulfilled.
(37:44):
Okay.
That's actually greatinformation because now I can be
like, what fulfills me?
But we just don't really thinkabout that as parents, or
fulfillment gets turned intojob.
Fulfillment just becomes money.
And if I can, like, create a bigbusiness, then I am fulfilled,
(38:05):
but it's so just one slice ofthis pie.
Totally
Britt (38:08):
feel the same about that.
Lindsey (38:10):
And that's why, as parents, for me, like, my, one
of my most important parenting.
Values is possibility.
So I don't care what my kids sayto me.
This is a little off topic frommoving, but I feel like it's in
line.
Like, if my kids are like, I'mgonna invent something or I'm
(38:30):
gonna invent this new thing.
I'm gonna start, uh, whatever.
I wanna fly.
I'm trying to fly.
Literally, they're, one of ourkids says like, I really need
this so I can fly.
And I'm just like, hell yeah.
Do it.
Because instilling possibilityin my kids is one of my number
(38:50):
one values.
It helps me remember my ownpossibility when things get
really limited.
And that's why we, that's whyyou should move somewhere.
Because it opens up that, yourwindow.
Your window's closed topossibility if you're in the
same place and you don't want tobe.
Open it up and be like, there'sa big ass world out here.
The thing about moving as afamily, not only is there
(39:13):
possibility, of course, there'salso new challenges, but that,
like, gives you that stretchygrowth that you can work with,
especially if you have some kindof personal practice or
whatever, you know, some kind ofself awareness practice that
(39:33):
It's good to be challenged.
When you move, you're going tobe challenged.
No matter if you're 19 or 22 or40 and no matter if you're
moving by yourself or movingwith a whole family, you're
going to be challenged becauseit's like so cliche, but
wherever you go, there you are.
So you can like leave your oldcity, your old people, but
you're bringing your baggagewith you.
(39:54):
The good thing is if you'reopen.
A curious seeker kind of person.
That's exciting because you'relike, oh, this is like a brand
new opportunity for me to shedsome shit that I was still
holding on to where I was.
I think you're
Britt (40:07):
just going to shed it by default as you go to.
You think so?
Yeah, to some extent.
Absolutely.
Because you're not stuck in thesame situation.
You're not seeing the samepeople.
Just like I was saying with mystories, they just kind of
melted away.
And then now I'm in situationswhere I feel like, Oh, I don't
have much to say.
And it's because I'm not justregurgitating the same shit that
(40:29):
was this facade, you know, thisego thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now that I'm not on that tripanymore, I'm building a new me
and learning how to communicate
Lindsey (40:41):
with people.
Yeah.
So what is building a new you?
Britt (40:46):
I'm still figuring it out every day, talking to new
people, figuring out what I'mpassionate about, you know, when
I'm out of it, what I miss andputting it all back together.
Lindsey (40:58):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because when we're in the sameplace, we, we just default to
this, like, Person that we areknown to be and there's doesn't
leave a lot of room forexploration of what you actually
like or what you actually wantto do because you're just like,
well, this is let me put on my.
(41:20):
My Lindsay suit today and beLindsay and all right.
It's all good.
I'm going to keep being Lindsay.
Let me do exactly what everyoneexpects.
But when you're in a new place,you have that freedom.
That is also a challenge.
And, and it doesn't always workfor people to move like people
move back or they, or they movesomewhere else.
That's another interesting thingthat I, I like about thinking
(41:45):
about alignment because we thinkyeah.
There can be a tendency to thinkthat when things are in
alignment, it will all be smoothand easy, and that's not true.
Like, a lot of alignment willrequire discomfort, because you
have to, if you're growing, ifyou're expanding, or you're
like, learning who you reallyare and ripping off the facade,
(42:06):
You're gonna meet an edge thatis uncomfortable, that is
discomfort, and you really haveto expand into that and see
who's really there, not the madeup person that was accepted in
the town you lived in before, orthe relationships, or the
(42:27):
friendships, or whatever, thecommunity that you'd been in for
a long time, but like, who am,who am I really when I'm meeting
this edge when there's like noone else to be for but you
Britt (42:38):
and I'm working through that right now.
It actually came up last week.
Lindsay and I were in a circletalking with people and you
know, we'd pass around a featheror whatever and whoever had it
could just speak about anythingthat was on their mind and
everyone else just listened.
And it seemed like kind of thetheme for everyone was ego.
(43:00):
Everyone was kind of workingthrough an ego thing at the
moment.
And it really brought up my ownawareness of what my ego trip is
right now, leaving Fort Worth,where I knew everybody either
through music, Or through therestaurant or whatever there was
always I knew everybody throughsomething, you know, that's what
(43:22):
my vision of myself was That'swhat my ego was.
These are the things that I doand that's why I know people and
that's who I am Right.
So when we decided to go on thistrip, I was like fuck.
Yeah, I get to get rid of my egoLet's do this and a lot of times
it's felt great.
And then there's sometimes whereI'm sitting here and I'm like
Out and there's cool peoplearound and I'm like, none of
(43:45):
these people know who I am andsometimes that feels great and
sometimes that's like, Oh, whatall these achievements that I
had that no one knows about werethey even achievements?
What was I feeling?
You know, did it?
Was that really something I didfor me?
Was that really something I didto impress people?
What of those things do I stilllove?
(44:07):
What still fulfills me?
And how do I keep doing that anddo it for me and not for my ego?
Mm
Lindsey (44:14):
hmm.
Mm.
That's so good.
Yeah, we do.
We just, we do things to put ona show.
And
Britt (44:23):
I've always felt like I knew who I was, you know?
I'm like, I've always had astrong sense of self.
You know, and now I'm realizing,like, what, how much of that
was, was me and how much of itwas just the story.
Mm hmm.
Lindsey (44:37):
Yeah.
Yeah.
So what does moving to a newplace then, what does that give
you in terms of that?
Well, I
Britt (44:46):
get to start over and, and like I said, feel out what.
What was important to me, whatdoes make me happy, and what was
just the story to impress peopleto make more friends.
So now when I'm talking topeople, I'm like, I don't know
these people, all of myreferences of my achievements
from a far away place don'ttranslate over here, so I can't,
(45:07):
I'm not even using thosereferences.
And I have to learn how tocommunicate with people again
now.
Lindsey (45:12):
Mmm.
Yeah, so it's communicating withpeople on a level that's more
than just, what do you do?
Britt (45:21):
Right.
It's, we're not just dorking outover obscure microphones or
whatever, you know?
I'm just talking, I'm justtrying to relate to people as
another human and not some weirdlike microphone encyclopedia.
You know what I mean?
Not really.
You But I'm think that's just anexample of the weird thing, you
(45:42):
know?
Yeah.
Just like me, just being sohyper obsessed with one thing
and hanging out with people thatwere obsessed with that
Lindsey (45:48):
thing.
Got it.
Got it.
Yeah.
You know, I still like, hold onto my old stories because I
think it, I, because some partof me thinks I need it to like
place me in the world of why Iam, it's like, why I'm valuable.
And I think that's why we all dolittle things like that, but
(46:10):
where I'll be like, say, Oh, Iused to own a restaurant and
it's like, that was so long ago.
Might as well have been, mightas well never happened.
It's like, what do you, yeah.
What do you do now?
What are you into now?
Even saying like, well, we camefrom Texas, when people ask
like, where are you from?
It feels like there needs to bethis whole story.
(46:31):
And I, every time I'm like, whydo I need to tell this story?
I don't really.
Same here.
I'm glad you feel that way too.
That's me just saying like, oh,but we've been traveling and
this and that.
And I don't think that'snecessary.
And maybe it is.
I don't know.
It's another paradox becausewe...
(46:52):
me, but I think this is true fora we, that we love connection.
And so when I meet someone, Iwant to know, like, I want to
know about you.
But maybe really knowing aboutyou isn't knowing that you were
born in wherever.
Maybe really knowing about youis like, what do you love?
Like, what kind of, you know,what, what art do you love?
(47:16):
What do you like?
Love in nature and what makesyou laugh and I wonder how to
like build a this is me storyLike, what do you do story out
of those things?
Yeah, like I used to own arestaurant and I'm from Fort
Worth but then I've beentraveling and now I live here
but I've only been here for amonth and like that becomes my
(47:36):
kind of Default story to likeplace me in the world.
I also think that is that we dothat to be like, Oh, I'm a safe
person.
Don't worry.
I didn't like roll off a train.
I'm not a weirdo.
Like my brain still will belike, what if people think that
you're like some transientweirdo, carny person.
(47:57):
I don't know.
Sorry.
Cut out that if you're notsupposed to say carny person,
people that work at carnivals,people that work at carnivals.
And you know what?
They're, we need them.
Britt (48:08):
I still feel like sometimes when I'm in a store
that everyone's looking at methinking I'm about to steal
something.
Yeah, yeah.
What the fuck is that?
I think a lot of people probablyfeel that.
Yeah, but it's like
Lindsey (48:18):
a low level, there's no way it's just you, but it's like
a low level questioning yourself worth, like I don't deserve
to be here.
Mm.
You know?
Interesting.
Yeah.
And yeah, so it's, it's inter,it's, it's definitely not
something to ignore.
I mean, it's just a silly littletrick that our mind plays on us,
but it is, it is a trick thatsays, I'm not supposed to be
(48:41):
here at, on some level, and thatyou're questioning whether I'm
supposed to be here.
So it's a way that we.
It's a way that we people pleasein these like micro ways.
Like, let me just micro turn onmy whatever ness so you know
that I'm not a thief stealingfrom your store.
(49:04):
And it is people pleasingbecause first of all, they don't
think that.
And second of all, the fact thatI need to turn on even some
ounce of something unconsciouslymeans that I am trying to.
Manipulate how they feel aboutme.
So that's why you should move soyou can be a complete weirdo
(49:24):
somewhere else.
A neurotic weirdo.
Go live in New York.
Be a neurotic weirdo andeveryone will love it.
Britt (49:33):
or la There's plenty of us here too.
Lindsey (49:37):
Yeah.
Um, that's just the way we'reall human and I think.
That that's important to knowthat we all have those feelings
and that you should still move.
You should move.
Everyone should move.
Do it.
Move once in your life.
Just get, get out of there.
If you're not young, then do itold.
Just do it.
Britt (49:54):
Yeah.
Bye bye.
Lindsey (49:55):
Bye.
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