December 1, 2024 • 26 mins
In this episode, Guy and Michelle explore why it's crucial to regularly pause and evaluate where you're heading in life. Drawing from their recent travels, they share a telling observation: at an exclusive resort pool, they found themselves surrounded by people staring at their phones, scrolling through social media posts of other people's vacations – missing the actual paradise right in front of them.
The episode unpacks the key components of an effective annual review:
- Acknowledging and celebrating your achievements
- Understanding and learning from setbacks
- Making necessary adjustments to your path
- Reviewing your various life roles – relationships, career, health, family, hobbies, and friendships
Guy and Michelle emphasise the importance of stepping away from daily routines to think strategically about your life. They discuss how to evaluate what "normal" looks like for you and whether it's serving your best interests or needs to change.
Whether you're feeling confident about your direction or seeking clarity, this episode offers practical approaches to help you take control of your journey and make intentional choices about where you're heading.
Tune in now for insights that will help you create positive change in your life.
#CaptainAndTheClown #PersonalGrowth #LifeGoals #Mindfulness #Reflection
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
G'day leaders, have you ever pressed the pause button and just taken stock of what direction
(00:07):
that you're heading in? In this episode we talk about a concept called steering the ship. It's
something that we do annually and I encourage others to do as well. It's basically where you
press the pause button and you take a wider view of life, of work, of health, of relationships,
just to check to see if the ship is heading in the direction that you want it to go. We talk about
(00:32):
what we do and how we do it and we encourage you to also every now and then just press the pause
button and just check to see is the ship going in the direction that you want. Enjoy. Why do
it count backwards? I know that we're now recording. What? Hello captain. What do I say? Come fly with me, let's fly, let's fly. What are we going to talk about? I don't know. So leadership, life and everything else. Yeah.
(01:06):
And we're live in Bali. Yeah recording in Bali. Recording in Bali. How exciting is this? I know, beautiful weather. Wow what a week it's been too. It has, it has, it's exactly what we needed, what the business needed. So what we're going to talk about today is steering the ship.
(01:34):
Which is a term I use to describe that every now and then you need to take a step back from life, back from business, back from your relationship, back from your family, back from your hobbies and just check to see is the ship going in the right direction. Yeah just a like a high level overview, just taking, taking a step back. Taking stock yeah. So we do this once a year where we do it for the first time.
(02:02):
Where we do it for the business obviously. So we check to see what direction the business is going and where we want to be but we also spend the time thinking about other areas of life and just you know taking a, what do you call it, like an overview. Yeah. Of how things are going. And that way you can start to make any adjustments that are needed.
(02:26):
Well I also like that it's not at the end of the year, it's towards the end of the year but it kind of gets a bit hectic towards the end of the year for us anyway. And with Christmas and other things you know coming up and other businesses shutting down and just yeah it's a good opportunity for us to see if we are on track from what the plans that we made last year.
(02:51):
Have they come to fruition and what we need to adjust. We can see that we got a little distracted along the way. There was a few distractions. I bet there was a lot of output too. Yeah. Yeah. And so and now moving forward where we want to go which is awesome. Very exciting.
So this whole concept of steering the ship it's something that we've been teaching in the time management course for a long time and I've been to many yearly conferences where I've been invited to speak at their conference to the typical keynote speech but I've also been to a few where I've run like breakout workshops.
(03:25):
And you know it's kind of like the companies use them as a celebration. They report in their earnings for the year or the projections for next year the budgets and the leaders will go off and have a little session and then the staff will have a big plenary and they'll get together.
And I love the fact that companies do that but I've always suggested to my clients that they need to go a bit deeper. They need to actually use them as a planning opportunity to steer the ship. Yeah. And so to encourage their staff and the leaders and the senior leaders to essentially do what we've done this week.
(04:00):
And that is to elevate yourself above the organization. Look at what direction the organization or your team or your individually how you're going and making the adjustments. So it's like getting out of the day to day grind so you can really see from a different perspective how things are traveling.
I think that that's the thing the grind. It's very easy to get caught up in that. And I know I'm guilty of that. It's just getting things done that are on my list and you know that I that I had planned but losing sight I suppose of the complete overview.
(04:39):
So yeah it's it's refreshing because now I can see the grind has actually you know we have me for it. Well yeah that's the thing if you every day you're in business as usual. Yes. So you work in an organization or you work for yourself as we do business as usual as you wake up you go and do whatever tasks you have on that day and you're focusing on the most immediate needs.
(05:04):
But very rarely do you carve out time to be strategic. Very rarely do you sit there and think OK how we traveling where are we going what are the mistakes that we've made what are the improvements we can make based on the learning from the mistakes those sort of things.
And that's why I've absolutely loved this week and I think you can hear it in our voice. Sound a little bit more chilled after a week. But excited to get excited. Yeah. But just being more strategic about that the way the future is going to unfold for us.
(05:34):
So we've had some expansion so we're expanding bringing on some new talents. Yes to help us this year and we're quite excited about next year as to what what the business looks like and what we're going to be doing. Yeah.
I'm just going to say one of the one of the good side benefits is that we also had a a policy of no tech. So obviously we're recording. But no no phones no laptops just good old pen and paper and and and books and and walking and talking.
(06:09):
That's it. Those walks along the beach in the morning just watching the sunrise and thinking about strategy. How refreshing was it. I know. And it's just I think I'm speaking for myself. I think I was at a little bit of burnout and I'm inspired and feeling creative about what's what's coming and even the ideas that we were discussing and just throwing out there.
(06:36):
There. Yeah. I think there's some more energy behind it. Yeah. Yeah. You know you need that reset. You need that reach and recharge. And the only way I think you can do that is to be more strategic in your thinking to get out of the day to day and really to look at what what is business as usual.
But what needs to change so that's going to be more effective going forward. I think the businesses like the day to day it has been unfortunately the phones and laptops and you know the emails coming in and text messages and different things and having a week of not having that.
(07:16):
It's been great to just be present and how sad was it what we saw at the. Yes. We have to describe this. So Michelle and I took the opportunity to go and spend a little bit of time at this adults only pool in the sounds kind of adults.
Yeah adults. No. No. Well there may have been a debauchery. I doubt it though because you weren't even allowed to take a drink into the pool. No kids allowed at this particular part of where we're staying. And so we went down there just thinking it's going to be a little bit more quiet than the main area of the resort that we're staying in.
(07:53):
But we went into this adults only sanctuary. It was like a Zen pool. Yeah. Zen pool. It was one of those infinity pools. So it was an absolutely beautiful setting. But when we got there and we looked around how shockingly disappointing was it.
Yes. Yes. Lots of skin. Lots of skin. People were in skimpy swimmers and things and very brown and oiled up. That's not what we noticed was it. No. It was the fact that every single person there was staring at a screen. At their phone. It could have been 30 or 40 people. Yeah. So they've flown halfway around the world wherever they've come from to sit around a pool and look at their screen something that they probably do every day at home.
(08:35):
And it was really really quite sad the fact that people can't go on holidays these days and just maybe sit there with their thoughts or a good book or talk to each other. There was couples everywhere but none of them were talking.
They were all on their phones looking at Instagram and Tik Tok and all the other social media. I saw one person like swiping on their phone and next to them they also had an iPad that they were flicking through. It was dual technology and it was really sad.
(09:08):
Well one of the conference centers we went to I was discussing it with one of the event managers there and she was saying that they laugh because they see this as well. People come from all around the world to a beautiful location that is Instagram worthy or whichever app worthy.
(09:31):
And rather than being in it they're looking at other people in tropical paradise. They're in tropical paradise themselves but not actually being present.
How hilarious is that? That you're sitting around a beautiful pool in a tropical paradise that you often dream about going on holiday and then you pull out a phone and you look at other people doing the same thing somewhere else.
(09:52):
It was absolutely ludicrous. We couldn't help laughing. I felt very rude and people were actually looking up off their phones every now and then. We didn't stay for long did we?
We were there for minutes. It was sad. It was really really sad to see. But like you said at these conference centers that we've been visiting and talking to.
We want to put on a new leadership event. One of the things that we're here planning is this big leadership event that we're going to be putting on and one of our ground rules is no technology. That's right. It's full immersion.
(10:24):
How can you possibly think that going away and staring at a screen is a holiday? I just don't get it.
No but even learning. The whole thing about the leadership retreat is to be fully immersed and with like minded people and looking at all the challenges and innovation and bouncing ideas off other people, like minded people without the distraction of having emails come in or looking at social media.
(10:54):
Sure you may have to check in at home after hours or whatever but it's that ability to be 100% present like you used to be or like you are when you're at university or college or you're in a role that is your presence is critical.
You have to be on. You have to be there and that's our vision for when people come.
(11:22):
So we're doing it ourselves this week. We're steering the ship. So we're taking a bird's eye view of business and life and health and relationships and kids etc.
So that's part of what we're thinking for the leadership retreat is to get people to step outside of their daily life and really start to steer the ship.
(11:43):
So let's go deeper into it, what it looks like to steer the ship. So there's different elements or areas within your life and the obvious one which we've been spending a lot of time on this week is your business.
So if you're an owner of a business, if you're a leader of a team or if you're just an employee, I shouldn't say like just an employee, if you're an employee and you need to maybe every now and then and we try and do this at least yearly,
(12:09):
is take yourself out of your day to day, elevate yourself above what you're doing in your day to day and just have a bird's eye view.
Are you heading in the right direction? Are you steering the ship in the direction that you want? Career wise, business wise, team wise, what have you learned over the last year?
Now I've recently heard it's not learned, it's learnt. UK has learnt and America has learnt and Australia just goes with whichever one they want.
(12:40):
We go both ways.
We're so closely related to both America and England, we can go either way. So yeah, just what have you learned over the last year?
What are your wins and what can you take away from those wins and what are the things that didn't go so well in your business or in your role and what can you adjust and how often do people do this?
(13:02):
Quite like often you have to be agile and be able to pivot quickly on things when they're like immediate actions required.
But sometimes you don't come back onto track and it's that squeaky wheel that's constant over there which is distracting you or taking you away from your star where you were initially aiming for.
(13:26):
So that's what we've found that helps us and we have regular check ins anyway.
But we do, especially daily don't we?
We do, we do. But it also works for your personal life and your social aspects where you want to be fitness wise, health wise, your family.
(13:48):
So they're the other roles. So the first role that we've spent a lot of time this week in is the work role but then you've got your relationship.
And so why not sit down with your partner once a year, once a fortnight, you make your due rate, how frequently you want to do this and just check in and say hey how are we going, how's this relationship working for you, what do you need from me that you're not currently getting.
(14:13):
And just checking in and steering the ship again. So if you're drifting apart, more date nights, more time together.
If you are drifting apart, find out what are you not giving your partner that would bring them back towards you, those sort of things.
And so you've got your relationships and then you've got relationships with your kids. So that's another one.
(14:36):
You could sit down with your kids as we both have done many times and say hey how are we going as a family, where are things, what's important to you, what needs to change.
And you can use that as an opportunity to remind them of chores and different things.
And then you've got your relationships with your friends. So you could just take stock.
(14:57):
And I'm an introvert so I have a handful of very, very amazing close friends and I often sit down and think about them and think about okay am I spending enough time contacting them.
And often I'm not because being an introvert and being so invested in what we do day by day today, I must admit that that's an area I've decided this week to invest more time and energy into.
(15:24):
I'm definitely guilty of that also. And then our health.
Health is another area that you really need to look at and steer the ship and you want to start looking at any negative or bad habits that have crept in and also the positive ones.
So one of the things we've done this week is to celebrate.
So in each of these roles that we're talking about where you're steering the ship or you're taking a bird's eye view over the roll is to celebrate the wins.
(15:50):
And I'm very proud of my daily cold showers now.
Oh yeah.
The first thing I do when I get out of bed is walk into it no matter how cold it is I walk into that bathroom and I wake myself up with a cold shower and it's invigorating.
I'm proud that that has now become my morning ritual.
Can I just point out though that your cold shower in Bali is not that cold.
Oh how disappointing is it.
(16:12):
I turn and I go when's it going to get cold?
Come on please.
It's like being in Darwin.
That's when we're going to Darwin soon.
We spoke about cold showers and ice baths there.
They laugh.
That was a few months ago wasn't it.
We're going back up there soon so they laugh.
They just can't get cold showers.
(16:34):
What are your wins this year in any area of your life that you're celebrating?
Professional.
Yep.
Taking the step across to new memory full time.
Yes.
And speaking full time.
Yep.
And.
My TED talk.
My TED talk yes.
Yes.
That was awesome.
I'm not sure when it's coming out.
Soon.
(16:55):
Soon.
And also.
Your book.
Yes the book is finished.
Now just need to find an editor and a publisher.
You will.
It's an amazing set of stories.
It's one big story that's just incredible.
I've had the privilege of being one of the first to read it and it's extraordinary.
(17:18):
Well even just writing them and I have been editing them quite a few times which a mentor
has told me that my fear of success is holding me back so I just keep editing, editing, editing.
Anyway that's another podcast but the reading through some of the stories some they brought
back memories and one in particular about a gentleman I flew for angel flight.
(17:44):
It really brought tears to my eyes.
And I think we've actually discussed it on one of the podcast episodes before but just
reading it I got a bit teary again.
So that's been great.
So celebrating wins.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So physical health what are the other areas in life that you need to look over.
So friendships, relationships, work, health, hobbies.
(18:08):
Are you still investing in your hobbies?
Are you carving out enough time for yourself to do what you love doing and I was speaking
to one of my mentors the other day and he reminded me that my happy place is swimming
and I do not do enough of it.
Here obviously we've got the resort pools and we can do a lot of it but on my daily
(18:29):
and weekly I often check into hotels.
Have I told you about my pool hotel dilemma?
No.
No, okay so this is a trick somebody's playing on me.
Many, many years ago I went to New Zealand and I specifically booked a hotel in Queenstown
because they had this amazing outdoor spa and you could sit in an outdoor spa in the snow
(18:53):
and I was looking forward to this big holiday.
Went over to Queenstown, went up to reception, checked in and said oh and can you let me
know where the outdoor spa is.
I've been looking forward to it all week and they said oh it hasn't been built yet.
And so I was very, very upset because this was one of my bucket list, I don't know how
(19:15):
I just got on my bucket list but have a spa outside in the snow.
I thought you jump out of the spa, you roll around in the snow, you jump back in the spa,
what an amazing experience but they said we're so sorry it hasn't been built yet.
I said how do you put that on your website if it hasn't been built yet?
And anyway and so they were very nice because then they got a little taxi for us and sent
us off to an onsen bath in Queenstown which was just the most amazing experience.
(19:40):
Anyway, ever since then I've had this curse, follow me, I will ring a hotel and say hey
do you have a pool, is it working, blah blah blah but I'll get to the hotel and it's not
working, it's broken down the day before.
Alright I rang one hotel, I won't name them because this was cheeky, I said to them is
your pool working and they said yes and I said it's definitely working and they said
(20:03):
yes because I love swimming.
Anyway I got to the hotel, I went up to a session, I said where's your pool, I said
it's just out there, I said oh cool can I have a towel, grabbed the towel, went out
there and it was advertised as heated, a heated outdoor pool.
So I jumped in and this is before I got into the cold therapy and the cold water, cold
plunge and it was the coldest pool I've ever dived into and I immediately lost my breath,
(20:31):
I jumped out, I drove myself off, I went back to the reception and I said you said it was
heated and they said yeah it is, by the sun.
But no actual solar heating on the roof, it was just whatever the sun could manage to do
to the water that was outside.
Anyway so that's a long story to share that I need to get back to swimming.
(20:56):
It's reminded me that the email that you received from a lady that you coached a while ago in
her fitness journey and I don't know if you can find it.
I will find it.
Yeah but just the...
(21:18):
And now I'll get my microphone and bring it back to my mouth.
So the story and I think you've mentioned, well I know you have in your workshops, definitely
about the easier, easier and then how you coached her or mentored her and then her relationship
(21:40):
with exercise and food all changed and now where her life has, where it's taken her.
So Danny, I won't say where she, I won't give out her surname just in case she doesn't want
to be named on the podcast but yeah she approached me many, many years ago and we had a chat
just about life and where she was at and she shared some personal things with me and I
(22:04):
just shared a couple of I guess thinking strategies and then a couple of years later she sent
me a beautiful message and with before and after photos and she, the before photos she
wasn't healthy as she is now or as healthy as she wanted to be as she is now and since
(22:28):
then she's moved up to the Gold Coast, her and her husband have bought a gym and she
is just like a shining example of somebody who took stock which is what we're talking
about today, you know, steering the ship, is my life going in the direction that I want?
She took stock and she thought no, my life is not going in the direction that I want
(22:51):
as she reached out to me, we had a bit of a chat and again shared some thinking strategies
and just a few mindset shifts and she has done enormously well to steer the ship in
a much healthier, much more life balance, anyway I could go on and on but yeah, there
is a real success story, I loved receiving that email and then she just recently contacted
(23:16):
me to again say that her and her husband have bought a gym and their lifestyle is balanced
and the whole family is now in fitness, it's brilliant, I'm just so proud of her but that's
what we're talking about here, it's about stopping your day to day, your business as
usual, your life as usual, your relationship as usual, your health as usual, everything
(23:37):
as usual is your day to day and in your day to day you can't be strategic so we need
to get away, we need to steer the ship and we need to make sure that we are using that
opportunity to change the course if the course needs to change and the way you do that is
by continuing what is working and adjust what is not working and so carve out some time
(23:59):
to do it like we have had the absolute blessing of being able to do that this week and we
can feel the results ourselves.
Oh absolutely and yeah just really, really excited about what's to come and yeah getting
back on track to where we were heading anyway, just slight little detours but yeah and celebrating
(24:21):
like you said, celebrating wins.
Celebrating wins, yeah well we sat down and we wrote down our wins and it went over pages,
yeah it was just lovely to see and we talk about little wins as well as the big wins,
it's not just celebrating the big things that you've achieved throughout the year like you
writing your book and everything else, it's the little adjustments.
Well playing board games every night at the dinner table.
(24:44):
Rather than the kids going off and watching TV or whatever, it's about designing your
life and steering the ship.
A little bit disappointing we didn't get our special guest this week.
Yeah I know, we almost crossed paths at the airport.
We probably did, we almost did cross paths at the airport, we were so close to having
a very, very special guest but we will plan to get him on the podcast in the future.
(25:08):
Actually we've got some lovely guests lined up haven't we?
We do.
Some very exciting guests.
Yeah and again that was part of this week is how we want the podcast, our vision for
the podcast and the guests that we have lined up and really excited to, because every guest
has done something amazing and we have an affinity with them in some way and we know
(25:33):
them or we've admired them from afar or we know them and admire them but yeah, they're
very inspiring people.
Okay so the message, get out of the business as usual, life as usual, relationship as usual,
steer the ship, learn what you can learn from what didn't go the way you want to, celebrate
what did go well and just take some time out for yourself.
(25:56):
Don't do it in your years evening, this year I'll quit drinking.
Oh no, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, that was fun and this has been a great week.
Thank you so much Michelle for what has been an amazing week and I look forward to doing
this again in a year's time.
I don't know where we'll do it, maybe the Maldives.
Oh that would be nice, before it sinks.
Before it sinks, because we're going to get over it and speak over there, that's on our
(26:18):
bucket list.
Yes.
Anyway, we're not going to call out to our potential sponsors because they haven't reached
out to us yet but the car wash kid keeps washing those cars.
That's right.
Cheers.
Bye.
Well that was fun.
That was fun.
You're such a clown.
The clown.
Lady captain.
Lady captain.
And who's going to listen to this?
(26:41):
Maybe our mums.
Thanks mum.
G'day leaders, have you ever pressed the pause button and just taken stock of what direction
(00:07):
that you're heading in? In this episode we talk about a concept called steering the ship. It's
something that we do annually and I encourage others to do as well. It's basically where you
press the pause button and you take a wider view of life, of work, of health, of relationships,
just to check to see if the ship is heading in the direction that you want it to go. We talk about
(00:32):
what we do and how we do it and we encourage you to also every now and then just press the pause
button and just check to see is the ship going in the direction that you want. Enjoy. Why do
it count backwards? I know that we're now recording. What? Hello captain. What do I say? Come fly with me, let's fly, let's fly. What are we going to talk about? I don't know. So leadership, life and everything else. Yeah.
(01:06):
And we're live in Bali. Yeah recording in Bali. Recording in Bali. How exciting is this? I know, beautiful weather. Wow what a week it's been too. It has, it has, it's exactly what we needed, what the business needed. So what we're going to talk about today is steering the ship.
(01:34):
Which is a term I use to describe that every now and then you need to take a step back from life, back from business, back from your relationship, back from your family, back from your hobbies and just check to see is the ship going in the right direction. Yeah just a like a high level overview, just taking, taking a step back. Taking stock yeah. So we do this once a year where we do it for the first time.
(02:02):
Where we do it for the business obviously. So we check to see what direction the business is going and where we want to be but we also spend the time thinking about other areas of life and just you know taking a, what do you call it, like an overview. Yeah. Of how things are going. And that way you can start to make any adjustments that are needed.
(02:26):
Well I also like that it's not at the end of the year, it's towards the end of the year but it kind of gets a bit hectic towards the end of the year for us anyway. And with Christmas and other things you know coming up and other businesses shutting down and just yeah it's a good opportunity for us to see if we are on track from what the plans that we made last year.
(02:51):
Have they come to fruition and what we need to adjust. We can see that we got a little distracted along the way. There was a few distractions. I bet there was a lot of output too. Yeah. Yeah. And so and now moving forward where we want to go which is awesome. Very exciting.
So this whole concept of steering the ship it's something that we've been teaching in the time management course for a long time and I've been to many yearly conferences where I've been invited to speak at their conference to the typical keynote speech but I've also been to a few where I've run like breakout workshops.
(03:25):
And you know it's kind of like the companies use them as a celebration. They report in their earnings for the year or the projections for next year the budgets and the leaders will go off and have a little session and then the staff will have a big plenary and they'll get together.
And I love the fact that companies do that but I've always suggested to my clients that they need to go a bit deeper. They need to actually use them as a planning opportunity to steer the ship. Yeah. And so to encourage their staff and the leaders and the senior leaders to essentially do what we've done this week.
(04:00):
And that is to elevate yourself above the organization. Look at what direction the organization or your team or your individually how you're going and making the adjustments. So it's like getting out of the day to day grind so you can really see from a different perspective how things are traveling.
I think that that's the thing the grind. It's very easy to get caught up in that. And I know I'm guilty of that. It's just getting things done that are on my list and you know that I that I had planned but losing sight I suppose of the complete overview.
(04:39):
So yeah it's it's refreshing because now I can see the grind has actually you know we have me for it. Well yeah that's the thing if you every day you're in business as usual. Yes. So you work in an organization or you work for yourself as we do business as usual as you wake up you go and do whatever tasks you have on that day and you're focusing on the most immediate needs.
(05:04):
But very rarely do you carve out time to be strategic. Very rarely do you sit there and think OK how we traveling where are we going what are the mistakes that we've made what are the improvements we can make based on the learning from the mistakes those sort of things.
And that's why I've absolutely loved this week and I think you can hear it in our voice. Sound a little bit more chilled after a week. But excited to get excited. Yeah. But just being more strategic about that the way the future is going to unfold for us.
(05:34):
So we've had some expansion so we're expanding bringing on some new talents. Yes to help us this year and we're quite excited about next year as to what what the business looks like and what we're going to be doing. Yeah.
I'm just going to say one of the one of the good side benefits is that we also had a a policy of no tech. So obviously we're recording. But no no phones no laptops just good old pen and paper and and and books and and walking and talking.
(06:09):
That's it. Those walks along the beach in the morning just watching the sunrise and thinking about strategy. How refreshing was it. I know. And it's just I think I'm speaking for myself. I think I was at a little bit of burnout and I'm inspired and feeling creative about what's what's coming and even the ideas that we were discussing and just throwing out there.
(06:36):
There. Yeah. I think there's some more energy behind it. Yeah. Yeah. You know you need that reset. You need that reach and recharge. And the only way I think you can do that is to be more strategic in your thinking to get out of the day to day and really to look at what what is business as usual.
But what needs to change so that's going to be more effective going forward. I think the businesses like the day to day it has been unfortunately the phones and laptops and you know the emails coming in and text messages and different things and having a week of not having that.
(07:16):
It's been great to just be present and how sad was it what we saw at the. Yes. We have to describe this. So Michelle and I took the opportunity to go and spend a little bit of time at this adults only pool in the sounds kind of adults.
Yeah adults. No. No. Well there may have been a debauchery. I doubt it though because you weren't even allowed to take a drink into the pool. No kids allowed at this particular part of where we're staying. And so we went down there just thinking it's going to be a little bit more quiet than the main area of the resort that we're staying in.
(07:53):
But we went into this adults only sanctuary. It was like a Zen pool. Yeah. Zen pool. It was one of those infinity pools. So it was an absolutely beautiful setting. But when we got there and we looked around how shockingly disappointing was it.
Yes. Yes. Lots of skin. Lots of skin. People were in skimpy swimmers and things and very brown and oiled up. That's not what we noticed was it. No. It was the fact that every single person there was staring at a screen. At their phone. It could have been 30 or 40 people. Yeah. So they've flown halfway around the world wherever they've come from to sit around a pool and look at their screen something that they probably do every day at home.
(08:35):
And it was really really quite sad the fact that people can't go on holidays these days and just maybe sit there with their thoughts or a good book or talk to each other. There was couples everywhere but none of them were talking.
They were all on their phones looking at Instagram and Tik Tok and all the other social media. I saw one person like swiping on their phone and next to them they also had an iPad that they were flicking through. It was dual technology and it was really sad.
(09:08):
Well one of the conference centers we went to I was discussing it with one of the event managers there and she was saying that they laugh because they see this as well. People come from all around the world to a beautiful location that is Instagram worthy or whichever app worthy.
(09:31):
And rather than being in it they're looking at other people in tropical paradise. They're in tropical paradise themselves but not actually being present.
How hilarious is that? That you're sitting around a beautiful pool in a tropical paradise that you often dream about going on holiday and then you pull out a phone and you look at other people doing the same thing somewhere else.
(09:52):
It was absolutely ludicrous. We couldn't help laughing. I felt very rude and people were actually looking up off their phones every now and then. We didn't stay for long did we?
We were there for minutes. It was sad. It was really really sad to see. But like you said at these conference centers that we've been visiting and talking to.
We want to put on a new leadership event. One of the things that we're here planning is this big leadership event that we're going to be putting on and one of our ground rules is no technology. That's right. It's full immersion.
(10:24):
How can you possibly think that going away and staring at a screen is a holiday? I just don't get it.
No but even learning. The whole thing about the leadership retreat is to be fully immersed and with like minded people and looking at all the challenges and innovation and bouncing ideas off other people, like minded people without the distraction of having emails come in or looking at social media.
(10:54):
Sure you may have to check in at home after hours or whatever but it's that ability to be 100% present like you used to be or like you are when you're at university or college or you're in a role that is your presence is critical.
You have to be on. You have to be there and that's our vision for when people come.
(11:22):
So we're doing it ourselves this week. We're steering the ship. So we're taking a bird's eye view of business and life and health and relationships and kids etc.
So that's part of what we're thinking for the leadership retreat is to get people to step outside of their daily life and really start to steer the ship.
(11:43):
So let's go deeper into it, what it looks like to steer the ship. So there's different elements or areas within your life and the obvious one which we've been spending a lot of time on this week is your business.
So if you're an owner of a business, if you're a leader of a team or if you're just an employee, I shouldn't say like just an employee, if you're an employee and you need to maybe every now and then and we try and do this at least yearly,
(12:09):
is take yourself out of your day to day, elevate yourself above what you're doing in your day to day and just have a bird's eye view.
Are you heading in the right direction? Are you steering the ship in the direction that you want? Career wise, business wise, team wise, what have you learned over the last year?
Now I've recently heard it's not learned, it's learnt. UK has learnt and America has learnt and Australia just goes with whichever one they want.
(12:40):
We go both ways.
We're so closely related to both America and England, we can go either way. So yeah, just what have you learned over the last year?
What are your wins and what can you take away from those wins and what are the things that didn't go so well in your business or in your role and what can you adjust and how often do people do this?
(13:02):
Quite like often you have to be agile and be able to pivot quickly on things when they're like immediate actions required.
But sometimes you don't come back onto track and it's that squeaky wheel that's constant over there which is distracting you or taking you away from your star where you were initially aiming for.
(13:26):
So that's what we've found that helps us and we have regular check ins anyway.
But we do, especially daily don't we?
We do, we do. But it also works for your personal life and your social aspects where you want to be fitness wise, health wise, your family.
(13:48):
So they're the other roles. So the first role that we've spent a lot of time this week in is the work role but then you've got your relationship.
And so why not sit down with your partner once a year, once a fortnight, you make your due rate, how frequently you want to do this and just check in and say hey how are we going, how's this relationship working for you, what do you need from me that you're not currently getting.
(14:13):
And just checking in and steering the ship again. So if you're drifting apart, more date nights, more time together.
If you are drifting apart, find out what are you not giving your partner that would bring them back towards you, those sort of things.
And so you've got your relationships and then you've got relationships with your kids. So that's another one.
(14:36):
You could sit down with your kids as we both have done many times and say hey how are we going as a family, where are things, what's important to you, what needs to change.
And you can use that as an opportunity to remind them of chores and different things.
And then you've got your relationships with your friends. So you could just take stock.
(14:57):
And I'm an introvert so I have a handful of very, very amazing close friends and I often sit down and think about them and think about okay am I spending enough time contacting them.
And often I'm not because being an introvert and being so invested in what we do day by day today, I must admit that that's an area I've decided this week to invest more time and energy into.
(15:24):
I'm definitely guilty of that also. And then our health.
Health is another area that you really need to look at and steer the ship and you want to start looking at any negative or bad habits that have crept in and also the positive ones.
So one of the things we've done this week is to celebrate.
So in each of these roles that we're talking about where you're steering the ship or you're taking a bird's eye view over the roll is to celebrate the wins.
(15:50):
And I'm very proud of my daily cold showers now.
Oh yeah.
The first thing I do when I get out of bed is walk into it no matter how cold it is I walk into that bathroom and I wake myself up with a cold shower and it's invigorating.
I'm proud that that has now become my morning ritual.
Can I just point out though that your cold shower in Bali is not that cold.
Oh how disappointing is it.
(16:12):
I turn and I go when's it going to get cold?
Come on please.
It's like being in Darwin.
That's when we're going to Darwin soon.
We spoke about cold showers and ice baths there.
They laugh.
That was a few months ago wasn't it.
We're going back up there soon so they laugh.
They just can't get cold showers.
(16:34):
What are your wins this year in any area of your life that you're celebrating?
Professional.
Yep.
Taking the step across to new memory full time.
Yes.
And speaking full time.
Yep.
And.
My TED talk.
My TED talk yes.
Yes.
That was awesome.
I'm not sure when it's coming out.
Soon.
(16:55):
Soon.
And also.
Your book.
Yes the book is finished.
Now just need to find an editor and a publisher.
You will.
It's an amazing set of stories.
It's one big story that's just incredible.
I've had the privilege of being one of the first to read it and it's extraordinary.
(17:18):
Well even just writing them and I have been editing them quite a few times which a mentor
has told me that my fear of success is holding me back so I just keep editing, editing, editing.
Anyway that's another podcast but the reading through some of the stories some they brought
back memories and one in particular about a gentleman I flew for angel flight.
(17:44):
It really brought tears to my eyes.
And I think we've actually discussed it on one of the podcast episodes before but just
reading it I got a bit teary again.
So that's been great.
So celebrating wins.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So physical health what are the other areas in life that you need to look over.
So friendships, relationships, work, health, hobbies.
(18:08):
Are you still investing in your hobbies?
Are you carving out enough time for yourself to do what you love doing and I was speaking
to one of my mentors the other day and he reminded me that my happy place is swimming
and I do not do enough of it.
Here obviously we've got the resort pools and we can do a lot of it but on my daily
(18:29):
and weekly I often check into hotels.
Have I told you about my pool hotel dilemma?
No.
No, okay so this is a trick somebody's playing on me.
Many, many years ago I went to New Zealand and I specifically booked a hotel in Queenstown
because they had this amazing outdoor spa and you could sit in an outdoor spa in the snow
(18:53):
and I was looking forward to this big holiday.
Went over to Queenstown, went up to reception, checked in and said oh and can you let me
know where the outdoor spa is.
I've been looking forward to it all week and they said oh it hasn't been built yet.
And so I was very, very upset because this was one of my bucket list, I don't know how
(19:15):
I just got on my bucket list but have a spa outside in the snow.
I thought you jump out of the spa, you roll around in the snow, you jump back in the spa,
what an amazing experience but they said we're so sorry it hasn't been built yet.
I said how do you put that on your website if it hasn't been built yet?
And anyway and so they were very nice because then they got a little taxi for us and sent
us off to an onsen bath in Queenstown which was just the most amazing experience.
(19:40):
Anyway, ever since then I've had this curse, follow me, I will ring a hotel and say hey
do you have a pool, is it working, blah blah blah but I'll get to the hotel and it's not
working, it's broken down the day before.
Alright I rang one hotel, I won't name them because this was cheeky, I said to them is
your pool working and they said yes and I said it's definitely working and they said
(20:03):
yes because I love swimming.
Anyway I got to the hotel, I went up to a session, I said where's your pool, I said
it's just out there, I said oh cool can I have a towel, grabbed the towel, went out
there and it was advertised as heated, a heated outdoor pool.
So I jumped in and this is before I got into the cold therapy and the cold water, cold
plunge and it was the coldest pool I've ever dived into and I immediately lost my breath,
(20:31):
I jumped out, I drove myself off, I went back to the reception and I said you said it was
heated and they said yeah it is, by the sun.
But no actual solar heating on the roof, it was just whatever the sun could manage to do
to the water that was outside.
Anyway so that's a long story to share that I need to get back to swimming.
(20:56):
It's reminded me that the email that you received from a lady that you coached a while ago in
her fitness journey and I don't know if you can find it.
I will find it.
Yeah but just the...
(21:18):
And now I'll get my microphone and bring it back to my mouth.
So the story and I think you've mentioned, well I know you have in your workshops, definitely
about the easier, easier and then how you coached her or mentored her and then her relationship
(21:40):
with exercise and food all changed and now where her life has, where it's taken her.
So Danny, I won't say where she, I won't give out her surname just in case she doesn't want
to be named on the podcast but yeah she approached me many, many years ago and we had a chat
just about life and where she was at and she shared some personal things with me and I
(22:04):
just shared a couple of I guess thinking strategies and then a couple of years later she sent
me a beautiful message and with before and after photos and she, the before photos she
wasn't healthy as she is now or as healthy as she wanted to be as she is now and since
(22:28):
then she's moved up to the Gold Coast, her and her husband have bought a gym and she
is just like a shining example of somebody who took stock which is what we're talking
about today, you know, steering the ship, is my life going in the direction that I want?
She took stock and she thought no, my life is not going in the direction that I want
(22:51):
as she reached out to me, we had a bit of a chat and again shared some thinking strategies
and just a few mindset shifts and she has done enormously well to steer the ship in
a much healthier, much more life balance, anyway I could go on and on but yeah, there
is a real success story, I loved receiving that email and then she just recently contacted
(23:16):
me to again say that her and her husband have bought a gym and their lifestyle is balanced
and the whole family is now in fitness, it's brilliant, I'm just so proud of her but that's
what we're talking about here, it's about stopping your day to day, your business as
usual, your life as usual, your relationship as usual, your health as usual, everything
(23:37):
as usual is your day to day and in your day to day you can't be strategic so we need
to get away, we need to steer the ship and we need to make sure that we are using that
opportunity to change the course if the course needs to change and the way you do that is
by continuing what is working and adjust what is not working and so carve out some time
(23:59):
to do it like we have had the absolute blessing of being able to do that this week and we
can feel the results ourselves.
Oh absolutely and yeah just really, really excited about what's to come and yeah getting
back on track to where we were heading anyway, just slight little detours but yeah and celebrating
(24:21):
like you said, celebrating wins.
Celebrating wins, yeah well we sat down and we wrote down our wins and it went over pages,
yeah it was just lovely to see and we talk about little wins as well as the big wins,
it's not just celebrating the big things that you've achieved throughout the year like you
writing your book and everything else, it's the little adjustments.
Well playing board games every night at the dinner table.
(24:44):
Rather than the kids going off and watching TV or whatever, it's about designing your
life and steering the ship.
A little bit disappointing we didn't get our special guest this week.
Yeah I know, we almost crossed paths at the airport.
We probably did, we almost did cross paths at the airport, we were so close to having
a very, very special guest but we will plan to get him on the podcast in the future.
(25:08):
Actually we've got some lovely guests lined up haven't we?
We do.
Some very exciting guests.
Yeah and again that was part of this week is how we want the podcast, our vision for
the podcast and the guests that we have lined up and really excited to, because every guest
has done something amazing and we have an affinity with them in some way and we know
(25:33):
them or we've admired them from afar or we know them and admire them but yeah, they're
very inspiring people.
Okay so the message, get out of the business as usual, life as usual, relationship as usual,
steer the ship, learn what you can learn from what didn't go the way you want to, celebrate
what did go well and just take some time out for yourself.
(25:56):
Don't do it in your years evening, this year I'll quit drinking.
Oh no, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, that was fun and this has been a great week.
Thank you so much Michelle for what has been an amazing week and I look forward to doing
this again in a year's time.
I don't know where we'll do it, maybe the Maldives.
Oh that would be nice, before it sinks.
Before it sinks, because we're going to get over it and speak over there, that's on our
(26:18):
bucket list.
Yes.
Anyway, we're not going to call out to our potential sponsors because they haven't reached
out to us yet but the car wash kid keeps washing those cars.
That's right.
Cheers.
Bye.
Well that was fun.
That was fun.
You're such a clown.
The clown.
Lady captain.
Lady captain.
And who's going to listen to this?
(26:41):
Maybe our mums.
Thanks mum.
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