October 15, 2024 • 21 mins
Sherry Sutton knows personal branding. Her superpower is delivering the best of business growth strategy alongside her ability to hold space and help audiences excavate their true selves, uncover their magnetic message, and show up authentically – all without feeling dorky, spammy, or overwhelmed.
She’s a magnetic speaker who has shared her vast knowledge in a TEDx Talk and on her successful podcast Bosses With Baggage. Her deeply personal talks take audiences on her journey from a chronic people pleaser who appeared to have it all, to losing it all to addiction, and her rise as a deeply authentic entrepreneur dedicated to helping others find their authentic voice.
Sherry has a master’s degree, an executive MBA, studied marketing at Yale, and spent nearly 30 years working in strategic, omnichannel marketing for everyone from start-ups to multi-billion dollar international conglomerates.
Elaine and Sherry have been laughing together as business besties ever since they met a few years ago. Elaine had the privilege of supporting and coaching Sherry with her famously authentic, life changing TedX Talk this past January in Frisco, TX.
Join them as they pull back the curtain on prepping and all the "before" things that happen before a big TedX talk. You will laugh while you learn and walk away inspired to take action for your next big hairy goal!
Learn more about Sherry on her Website and YouTube Channel.
Connect with your Host, Elaine Williams:
Check out Captivate the Mic Podcast on Elaine's YouTube Channel
Check out the Captivate the Crowd Website
Follow Elaine on Social- LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok
Want to schedule a free chat with Elaine? Click here to book a zoom date!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:06):
Hello and welcome.
I am so excited to have thisfabulous woman, Sherry Sutton.
She is amazing.
She's one of my business bestiesand she's so beautiful.
And also kind and also freakingbrilliant.
So Sherry, welcome.
Thanks for having me.
We met through a couple ofdifferent networking things.
(00:28):
And you just meet some peopleand you're this is my person.
And I didn't know a lot ofpeople in Dallas after, Moving
back to help my parents andshe's one of the people I can be
like, We like never talk on thephone unless we're like, Talk me
(00:51):
off the ledge.
I'm going to go and fire all myclients and I'm going to work at
Walmart.
I'm just going to work atWalmart.
Okay.
Every once in a while, I callyou when I'm having something
good happen, but yeah she's oneof those back pocket women,
ledge talk one on one.
So we know a little bit aboutyou.
You're an amazing marketer.
(01:14):
You're also a brandphotographer.
Is there anything else you wantto tell us about before we get
into the story?
Yeah.
I'm a marketing mentor.
I work with small businessowners who are ready to do
marketing, but just aren't, theydon't want to Google anymore,
right?
They're sick of Googling andthey don't want to write a 10,
(01:34):
000 check for an ad agency to doit.
And so they're in between andthey're trying to figure out how
the heck do I market myself?
And I want somebody who knowswhat they're doing to tell me
exactly what to do so I don'twaste my time and my money.
And also so I don't.
in a way that I don't feel likea spammy weirdo.
Yeah.
No spammy weirdos in there.
And there, I do think there's abalance so the, the whole idea
(01:56):
of this.
My podcast captivate the mic wasto have fabulous women sharing a
story that's, enticing andinteresting.
And then after she shares it, wetalk a little bit about, Oh, I
love that.
Cause I don't know about you,Sherry, but I listen to podcasts
and sometimes the ones I'mspeaking are so boring.
(02:16):
And I want to make, I want tocreate art.
That's like valuable andentertaining and inspiring.
But That's entertaining, so nopressure, but no, I'm just
kidding, but you charming, befabulous.
Damn it.
Oh no.
Or like when people would say,Oh, you're a comedian.
Be funny.
It's you know what?
It doesn't work that way.
(02:37):
You can't handle the funny.
No.
You have a great talk and I feellike I got to be a part of it.
So I can't wait for you toenlighten us on, you did a TED
talk in January of 2024.
And I know so many people aspireto do that and tell us all this
(02:58):
stuff.
Yeah, so I wanted to share thestory of how how I got the TEDx
because I think it's aninteresting story in both
intention setting as well asactually taking the action to
make things happen.
I think sometimes in our worldwe get very focused on this
manifest your destiny and allyou have to do is You know, sit
(03:20):
in Lotus and go, Oh, and thinkabout what you want.
And it's all good.
If you get aligned with theuniverse, it'll all come to you.
And I think that's true, but Ialso think it requires action.
And so my story reallyhighlights that.
So back in, it was probablyJanuary of 2023, I had this.
(03:45):
Put on my heart that I wanted todo a Ted talk.
I'd always watched Ted talks.
I am in recovery.
I love Ted talks and I alwayswanted it to do one.
And so it was like, now's thetime.
And so I was doing a visionboard with a group of women.
And for those of you who arelistening to this podcast, you
(04:06):
can't see what I'm holding up,but I'm holding up that vision
board.
And in the upper.
And upper corner, there is apicture of the TEDx stage.
So in January of 2023, I putthat out into the universe, did
the did what the manifestingpeople tell you to do.
And I said aligned with mypurpose, I'm going to say I want
(04:29):
to do a TED talk.
So I then decided I'll take theaction.
I looked to see, okay, where arethere TED Talks near me?
I interviewed some other peoplewho had done TED Talks to
understand what the process is,and I apply to do a TED Talk in
my hometown.
So I go to the website, I getall dressed up.
(04:52):
I spend all this time prepping.
I do the video.
It's awesome.
I think it's awesome.
And then you're like, so nervousand you feel so vulnerable, it's
you feel vulnerable because youwant it.
Yeah.
And I, I'm usually very I don'treally, if it happens.
If it doesn't, and with thisone, I was, I wanted it to your
point.
So yeah, then you're alone inyour office like standing there
(05:12):
like doing your presentation.
Anyway, so I submit this thingit's probably like February, and
there's going to be a TEDxevent.
in May.
I think it was in May.
I'm late to the party, but whoknows?
So I submitted online becausethey said they were still
accepting applications and I'mwaiting and I'm waiting and I
(05:35):
find the lady who runs it and Istart stalking her online and I
send her notes on LinkedIn and Isend her notes on Facebook and I
said, and I nothing, I hearnothing back.
And so I'm like, okay, Thisisn't my time.
It's just not my time.
I'm cool with that, right?
I'll do it again later.
I'll apply in different areas.
I didn't really know you couldapply outside of your home area,
(05:57):
but so I'm like, I'll do it.
I'll do it later.
So May comes and I'm like, Huh,I haven't seen any social media
posts about this TEDx happening.
And so it might have even beenJune at that point.
And I go and I look and there'snothing.
There's no social media posts.
There's nothing.
I go to the website, nothing.
(06:18):
I realized that it has been, itjust never happened, right?
The TEDx that had been plannedjust never happened.
So I was oh that's.
Weird.
I guess I feel better that's whyI didn't get accepted.
But okay, right?
The universe has spoken.
So towards the end of thatsummer, it might have even been
(06:39):
like September, a social mediapost comes up on the TEDx Frisco
website or wherever and says,we've changed ownership and this
new person is now organizing ourTEDx.
And so I was okay, cool.
I'm going to go stalk the crapout of her online and see if I
(06:59):
can get, my application back infront of her, because clearly
she's seen my application,right?
So it's happening in January.
I know that she's going to belooking for speakers.
And so I want to make sure thatmy application got to her.
And if not, I'll send heranother one.
So I stalk her on Instagram andall the places.
And she reaches back out to meand says, yeah, I'd love to talk
(07:23):
to you.
I was like, okay, cool.
So I get on a zoom with her.
And by the end of the zoom, Ihave landed the TED talk.
But that's not the cool part.
So I go through the whole thing.
I do the whole, the Ted talk.
It goes great, spend monthsprepping.
(07:45):
We do the TEDx in January.
It was an incredible experience.
I feel so grateful and we arehaving dinner.
all the speakers afterwards.
We had a celebratory dinner afew weeks after the TED talk.
And I said, gosh, I'm so gladthat I, reached out to you.
(08:06):
And I'm so glad that like myapplication was still there
after all that time and that youhad taken over and we're looking
for new speakers and she goes,oh no.
We weren't looking for newspeakers.
We were only going to take thespeakers goosebumps.
We were only going to take thespeakers who were already booked
(08:31):
for the may event.
I never saw your application,but when you reached out to me,
I just had a feeling.
And so I agreed to meet with youbecause I realized that our
event.
wouldn't be the same withoutyou.
And so I never saw yourapplication and we weren't
(08:51):
looking for speakers, but I metyou and I knew you had to be
part of it.
Wow.
I was like, wow.
I just was so honored.
And I think You know, it's agreat lesson in you can
manifest, you can decide whatyou want to do, you can make
decisions, you can take theactions, but it doesn't matter
(09:16):
unless you're willing tocontinue to take.
repetitive action, right?
Just because someone says noonce doesn't mean that it's not,
or it doesn't work out oncedoesn't mean you don't apply
again, right?
And I didn't know this at thetime, but TED speakers tend to
apply to multiple places beforethey ever get in.
This is like a unicorn.
(09:36):
thing that happened to me, butit's about setting the
intention, but then also beingwilling to take the action and
be persistent and put your handup and say, I want this.
I think as women, we don't say Iwant this.
I want this.
What do I need to do to convinceyou?
And I remember years ago,someone, coached me on
(09:57):
interviewing and they said, askfor the job.
The people who ask for the jobgenerally get the job because no
one asks, no one says, I wantthis job.
Wow.
Wow.
So I think it's a cool story.
I love that so much.
What a beautiful story.
And I didn't know, I knew partsof it.
(10:18):
So wow.
Amazing.
I needed this today, by the way,so thank you.
So yeah, so many great things.
Obviously the content wasbeautiful and I felt like you
were real and raw.
You're so great with yourpausing.
Like I really loved your paceand you're like telling the
(10:39):
story, but then you took sometime because as an audience
person, especially if we don'tknow you or we don't know your
story, it takes time for us toprocess.
And so I just really loved howyou took your time and you had
vocal variety.
You went up and then you wentsome down and there was some
(11:01):
modulation, but here's the realthing, just, that was lovely.
Lovely storytelling.
Anyone who's listening, whowants to become a better
speaker, go watch Sherry's Tedtalk too.
And another reason I'm inrecovery as well.
And I watch a lot of Ted talkstoo.
(11:21):
And Sherry's is one of the verybest crafted I've ever seen.
The way you weave in your storyand The emotions and the
process.
And so yeah, kudos, kudos.
That was beautiful.
That was so beautiful.
(11:42):
And I, I think what happens, weboth work with mostly female
entrepreneurs and a few smartmen.
And I know I'm a recoveringdrama queen.
I'm a recovering, supersensitive Sally.
And this is something I am stillgetting to work on.
Thank you, universe.
I'm pretty good at taking someaction, setting the intention,
(12:02):
taking some action.
But if I get three nos likethat's where I will stop.
And I'm not even conscious thatI do that sometimes, but I love
it that you just stayed open toit.
And I also love the fact that,yeah, it's good to set
intentions.
It's great to do vision boards.
And now you have to get off yourbutt and do the work, and I call
(12:24):
that the unsexy parts ofbusiness, right?
I just want to be on stagecoaching and speaking and doing
my comedy.
And yet there's all this otherstuff in business.
That is required.
I just love it that it wouldhave been so easy to just give
up on the Frisco thing, fromwhat I've heard, producing Ted
(12:45):
Talks is really challenging andit's totally for the love of it.
It's a volunteer position.
And what I've learned is that alot of Ted producers get burned
out.
Because it's like a full timejob and a lot of them have a
job, so I just love that Sherryand another thing I want to
(13:06):
highlight, I'll put her TEDtalk.
I'll put the link in the shownotes I have been to several TED
talks and the production valuesat this one.
I went to support one of myclients and I was horrified.
And I remember thinking, I don'tknow what the TEDx is versus
the, I don't know the nuances,but I was embarrassed.
(13:30):
For the speakers that they wereliterally junior high kids doing
the lighting and the sound andpeople were in the dark people
were like half shadow it wasalmost how not to put on an
event, and of course, I justkept biting my tongue because I
didn't want to squelch.
My client, she was happy.
She just wanted to do it and shedidn't seem to care that she was
in the dark and nobody couldhear her.
(13:50):
And so I didn't want to burstthat bubble, right?
Like I helped her prep, but Iremember walking away thinking,
okay, I'm not sure I want to bea part of that, and then, so I
was so excited, Sherry, cause Igot to come be at your beautiful
event.
And it was.
The complete opposite.
Like it was so professional.
It was in this beautiful space.
(14:11):
The lighting, the production,the sound, everything was like
next level.
It was amazing.
And so I'm so grateful that Istayed open.
And then I had the privilege ofhelping you tweak some vocal
things, so many great lessonsabout.
Being open and no just means notright now and not making it mean
(14:34):
stuff about you.
Yeah.
And I think, let's be clear, nois a full sentence and if some,
if someone says no and it'ssafety thing or whatever, right?
Obviously no means no.
But there are times like thiswhere I actually wasn't told no,
I just never received an answer.
And so I could have perceivedthat as a no.
(14:57):
Absolutely.
Or, go somewhere else, I couldhave gone somewhere else, even
if I was told no, there's plentyof other TEDx's that I could
have applied for.
I didn't take the lack ofresponse as a no.
I continued to take the action,even though my sensitive Sally
self, and you and I are verysimilar in that.
(15:18):
Wanted to make it all about me.
I wanted it to be like, Oh, theydidn't like me.
And it wasn't that the woman whowas organizing it literally,
this is what happened, had amassive life health.
I think meltdown, there was somemajor life catastrophe that
happened to her.
If I had been in my ego self,And I would have very easily
(15:40):
said this is all they didn'tlike me, they should have
watched my video and thoughtthat I was brilliant and given
me the best spot, or whatever.
Like they would create their ownTed just for me.
And I didn't, I was able to stayhumble through the process and
go, okay something happened,they never said no, but they
never said, yes, somethinghappened.
Let me keep pursuing this,right?
(16:01):
Until someone definitively tellsme.
And then if they do tell me no,have the humility to go
somewhere else and know thatwasn't the one that was
energetically aligned for me.
See, I love that so much.
I've been struggling with somedepression and just funk.
And I really think this was Godtoday.
Like you're interviewing Sherryfor your own sanity, because I
(16:26):
know for me too.
And I don't want to admit this,but.
I teach vulnerability andauthenticity, as do you, and
when, sometimes if I'm not in agood spiritual place, so I could
easily, if I were in your shoes,I could have easily taken that
as a no response means no, andthen where I go, because
emotionally I can be five.
(16:47):
I'm being vulnerable here,people, as I become an F.
U.
I'll take my toys and I'm gonnago somewhere else because you
don't know who I am.
And I'm not proud of that.
Or you do the other side of it,which is I'm going to take my
toys and go somewhere else, orthe other side is I'm a piece of
crap, and I'm not worthy, andthis will never happen for me,
(17:11):
and how dare I think I couldhave done this, how dare I think
that, how that's where I go.
Oh yeah, I, yeah, I vacillate.
Like a ping pong game, who doyou think you are Elaine, or, I
still have my stepmother'svoice, even though she's in the
big pharmacy in the sky, I saythat cause that was her happiest
(17:31):
place when she was in thepharmacy.
I still hear that voice, you'reno spring chicken.
I'm well aware.
I am well aware of that.
So I just love that.
And I think, it's such a greatexample of.
There's a famous quote by acomedian who says, you have to
want it more than you're afraidof it.
(17:54):
And I just think that is sojuicy, cause there's always a
good reason to not send theemail or not pick up the phone
or whatever.
I love that Sherry.
And is it okay, may I give youone little tweak I would love to
see for next time?
Yeah, of course.
But with your storytelling is, Iwant you to keep playing with
your voice.
(18:16):
Because you have, and I know Iget like excited and I can be up
here sometimes and That would bethe only thing is just to keep
playing with vocal varietybecause we want resonance and
you are a beautiful speaker.
And one of the things I thinksometimes we overlook is the
voice, the charismatic voice.
(18:37):
You know how there's some peoplewhen they're talking, you're
like, Oh, I love that voice.
James Earl Jones, who we justlost recently, so that's just
the one tiny tweak I would say.
And a lot of, women strugglewith that, myself included, so
thank you for that.
And you gave me a lot of thatcoaching, leading up to the Ted,
(18:57):
right?
You helped me with pacing andthat voice modulation, right?
Some of the movements as well.
We don't hear ourselves likeliterally we can't hear
ourselves.
And so I don't know what, do youusually advise people to record
themselves and watch themselvesjust so that they can hear that.
(19:18):
themselves.
It's so cringy, but it.
If they are new, I do not,because for some people just,
getting on camera or thinkingabout being on stage is so I
really work with them comingfrom their why and trying to
come from within and focusingon.
The person because that willhelp them be less self conscious
(19:41):
now once you've gotten over thatFirst big hurdle like I'm short
and curvy all I can see are myboobs or you know I have
sometimes I have to watch myselfon videos several times before I
can see myself Because I stillhave critical body.
What woman who doesn't, right?
And so if somebody is alreadyspeaking and yeah, this is how I
(20:04):
look.
This is how I sound.
I'm, I look amazing.
I'm 87.
Look, I look amazing.
And so I tell people I'm 87 andthen they go, wow, you look
amazing.
You can use that.
Once you've gotten over thathurdle of yeah, this is what I
do.
Then I encourage people to watchthemselves and record.
And.
Let me tell you, editingyourself, whoo, that is humbling
(20:27):
because when I'm excited, I cansound like a valley girl, which
I am like Elaine.
So that's been a rude awakening,but a good awakening.
I'm working on coming more frommy center and can I be excited
without that?
Going into the, Oh my God, I'mso excited.
(20:48):
It's Oh, Elaine, you're 56.
So thank you Sherry so much.
If people want to find you,where can they find you?
Yeah, so my website issherrysutton.
com, S H E R Y S U T O N.
com, and you can find me in allthe social places.
(21:10):
I'm under Sherry Sutton, yourmarketing mentor.
And you can also find my TEDx,and you're going to put the
notes below, but if you want to,if you guys want to Google for
it, it's called How FacebookSaved My Life and Started an
Authenticity Revolution.
Oh, I love it.
Thank you, Sherry.
This was great.
Fabulous and amazing.
(21:31):
I'm uplifted and inspired by youas always.
And thanks everybody and go makeit a great day.
Bye.
Bye.
Hello and welcome.
I am so excited to have thisfabulous woman, Sherry Sutton.
She is amazing.
She's one of my business bestiesand she's so beautiful.
And also kind and also freakingbrilliant.
So Sherry, welcome.
Thanks for having me.
We met through a couple ofdifferent networking things.
(00:28):
And you just meet some peopleand you're this is my person.
And I didn't know a lot ofpeople in Dallas after, Moving
back to help my parents andshe's one of the people I can be
like, We like never talk on thephone unless we're like, Talk me
(00:51):
off the ledge.
I'm going to go and fire all myclients and I'm going to work at
Walmart.
I'm just going to work atWalmart.
Okay.
Every once in a while, I callyou when I'm having something
good happen, but yeah she's oneof those back pocket women,
ledge talk one on one.
So we know a little bit aboutyou.
You're an amazing marketer.
(01:14):
You're also a brandphotographer.
Is there anything else you wantto tell us about before we get
into the story?
Yeah.
I'm a marketing mentor.
I work with small businessowners who are ready to do
marketing, but just aren't, theydon't want to Google anymore,
right?
They're sick of Googling andthey don't want to write a 10,
(01:34):
000 check for an ad agency to doit.
And so they're in between andthey're trying to figure out how
the heck do I market myself?
And I want somebody who knowswhat they're doing to tell me
exactly what to do so I don'twaste my time and my money.
And also so I don't.
in a way that I don't feel likea spammy weirdo.
Yeah.
No spammy weirdos in there.
And there, I do think there's abalance so the, the whole idea
(01:56):
of this.
My podcast captivate the mic wasto have fabulous women sharing a
story that's, enticing andinteresting.
And then after she shares it, wetalk a little bit about, Oh, I
love that.
Cause I don't know about you,Sherry, but I listen to podcasts
and sometimes the ones I'mspeaking are so boring.
(02:16):
And I want to make, I want tocreate art.
That's like valuable andentertaining and inspiring.
But That's entertaining, so nopressure, but no, I'm just
kidding, but you charming, befabulous.
Damn it.
Oh no.
Or like when people would say,Oh, you're a comedian.
Be funny.
It's you know what?
It doesn't work that way.
(02:37):
You can't handle the funny.
No.
You have a great talk and I feellike I got to be a part of it.
So I can't wait for you toenlighten us on, you did a TED
talk in January of 2024.
And I know so many people aspireto do that and tell us all this
(02:58):
stuff.
Yeah, so I wanted to share thestory of how how I got the TEDx
because I think it's aninteresting story in both
intention setting as well asactually taking the action to
make things happen.
I think sometimes in our worldwe get very focused on this
manifest your destiny and allyou have to do is You know, sit
(03:20):
in Lotus and go, Oh, and thinkabout what you want.
And it's all good.
If you get aligned with theuniverse, it'll all come to you.
And I think that's true, but Ialso think it requires action.
And so my story reallyhighlights that.
So back in, it was probablyJanuary of 2023, I had this.
(03:45):
Put on my heart that I wanted todo a Ted talk.
I'd always watched Ted talks.
I am in recovery.
I love Ted talks and I alwayswanted it to do one.
And so it was like, now's thetime.
And so I was doing a visionboard with a group of women.
And for those of you who arelistening to this podcast, you
(04:06):
can't see what I'm holding up,but I'm holding up that vision
board.
And in the upper.
And upper corner, there is apicture of the TEDx stage.
So in January of 2023, I putthat out into the universe, did
the did what the manifestingpeople tell you to do.
And I said aligned with mypurpose, I'm going to say I want
(04:29):
to do a TED talk.
So I then decided I'll take theaction.
I looked to see, okay, where arethere TED Talks near me?
I interviewed some other peoplewho had done TED Talks to
understand what the process is,and I apply to do a TED Talk in
my hometown.
So I go to the website, I getall dressed up.
(04:52):
I spend all this time prepping.
I do the video.
It's awesome.
I think it's awesome.
And then you're like, so nervousand you feel so vulnerable, it's
you feel vulnerable because youwant it.
Yeah.
And I, I'm usually very I don'treally, if it happens.
If it doesn't, and with thisone, I was, I wanted it to your
point.
So yeah, then you're alone inyour office like standing there
(05:12):
like doing your presentation.
Anyway, so I submit this thingit's probably like February, and
there's going to be a TEDxevent.
in May.
I think it was in May.
I'm late to the party, but whoknows?
So I submitted online becausethey said they were still
accepting applications and I'mwaiting and I'm waiting and I
(05:35):
find the lady who runs it and Istart stalking her online and I
send her notes on LinkedIn and Isend her notes on Facebook and I
said, and I nothing, I hearnothing back.
And so I'm like, okay, Thisisn't my time.
It's just not my time.
I'm cool with that, right?
I'll do it again later.
I'll apply in different areas.
I didn't really know you couldapply outside of your home area,
(05:57):
but so I'm like, I'll do it.
I'll do it later.
So May comes and I'm like, Huh,I haven't seen any social media
posts about this TEDx happening.
And so it might have even beenJune at that point.
And I go and I look and there'snothing.
There's no social media posts.
There's nothing.
I go to the website, nothing.
(06:18):
I realized that it has been, itjust never happened, right?
The TEDx that had been plannedjust never happened.
So I was oh that's.
Weird.
I guess I feel better that's whyI didn't get accepted.
But okay, right?
The universe has spoken.
So towards the end of thatsummer, it might have even been
(06:39):
like September, a social mediapost comes up on the TEDx Frisco
website or wherever and says,we've changed ownership and this
new person is now organizing ourTEDx.
And so I was okay, cool.
I'm going to go stalk the crapout of her online and see if I
(06:59):
can get, my application back infront of her, because clearly
she's seen my application,right?
So it's happening in January.
I know that she's going to belooking for speakers.
And so I want to make sure thatmy application got to her.
And if not, I'll send heranother one.
So I stalk her on Instagram andall the places.
And she reaches back out to meand says, yeah, I'd love to talk
(07:23):
to you.
I was like, okay, cool.
So I get on a zoom with her.
And by the end of the zoom, Ihave landed the TED talk.
But that's not the cool part.
So I go through the whole thing.
I do the whole, the Ted talk.
It goes great, spend monthsprepping.
(07:45):
We do the TEDx in January.
It was an incredible experience.
I feel so grateful and we arehaving dinner.
all the speakers afterwards.
We had a celebratory dinner afew weeks after the TED talk.
And I said, gosh, I'm so gladthat I, reached out to you.
(08:06):
And I'm so glad that like myapplication was still there
after all that time and that youhad taken over and we're looking
for new speakers and she goes,oh no.
We weren't looking for newspeakers.
We were only going to take thespeakers goosebumps.
We were only going to take thespeakers who were already booked
(08:31):
for the may event.
I never saw your application,but when you reached out to me,
I just had a feeling.
And so I agreed to meet with youbecause I realized that our
event.
wouldn't be the same withoutyou.
And so I never saw yourapplication and we weren't
(08:51):
looking for speakers, but I metyou and I knew you had to be
part of it.
Wow.
I was like, wow.
I just was so honored.
And I think You know, it's agreat lesson in you can
manifest, you can decide whatyou want to do, you can make
decisions, you can take theactions, but it doesn't matter
(09:16):
unless you're willing tocontinue to take.
repetitive action, right?
Just because someone says noonce doesn't mean that it's not,
or it doesn't work out oncedoesn't mean you don't apply
again, right?
And I didn't know this at thetime, but TED speakers tend to
apply to multiple places beforethey ever get in.
This is like a unicorn.
(09:36):
thing that happened to me, butit's about setting the
intention, but then also beingwilling to take the action and
be persistent and put your handup and say, I want this.
I think as women, we don't say Iwant this.
I want this.
What do I need to do to convinceyou?
And I remember years ago,someone, coached me on
(09:57):
interviewing and they said, askfor the job.
The people who ask for the jobgenerally get the job because no
one asks, no one says, I wantthis job.
Wow.
Wow.
So I think it's a cool story.
I love that so much.
What a beautiful story.
And I didn't know, I knew partsof it.
(10:18):
So wow.
Amazing.
I needed this today, by the way,so thank you.
So yeah, so many great things.
Obviously the content wasbeautiful and I felt like you
were real and raw.
You're so great with yourpausing.
Like I really loved your paceand you're like telling the
(10:39):
story, but then you took sometime because as an audience
person, especially if we don'tknow you or we don't know your
story, it takes time for us toprocess.
And so I just really loved howyou took your time and you had
vocal variety.
You went up and then you wentsome down and there was some
(11:01):
modulation, but here's the realthing, just, that was lovely.
Lovely storytelling.
Anyone who's listening, whowants to become a better
speaker, go watch Sherry's Tedtalk too.
And another reason I'm inrecovery as well.
And I watch a lot of Ted talkstoo.
(11:21):
And Sherry's is one of the verybest crafted I've ever seen.
The way you weave in your storyand The emotions and the
process.
And so yeah, kudos, kudos.
That was beautiful.
That was so beautiful.
(11:42):
And I, I think what happens, weboth work with mostly female
entrepreneurs and a few smartmen.
And I know I'm a recoveringdrama queen.
I'm a recovering, supersensitive Sally.
And this is something I am stillgetting to work on.
Thank you, universe.
I'm pretty good at taking someaction, setting the intention,
(12:02):
taking some action.
But if I get three nos likethat's where I will stop.
And I'm not even conscious thatI do that sometimes, but I love
it that you just stayed open toit.
And I also love the fact that,yeah, it's good to set
intentions.
It's great to do vision boards.
And now you have to get off yourbutt and do the work, and I call
(12:24):
that the unsexy parts ofbusiness, right?
I just want to be on stagecoaching and speaking and doing
my comedy.
And yet there's all this otherstuff in business.
That is required.
I just love it that it wouldhave been so easy to just give
up on the Frisco thing, fromwhat I've heard, producing Ted
(12:45):
Talks is really challenging andit's totally for the love of it.
It's a volunteer position.
And what I've learned is that alot of Ted producers get burned
out.
Because it's like a full timejob and a lot of them have a
job, so I just love that Sherryand another thing I want to
(13:06):
highlight, I'll put her TEDtalk.
I'll put the link in the shownotes I have been to several TED
talks and the production valuesat this one.
I went to support one of myclients and I was horrified.
And I remember thinking, I don'tknow what the TEDx is versus
the, I don't know the nuances,but I was embarrassed.
(13:30):
For the speakers that they wereliterally junior high kids doing
the lighting and the sound andpeople were in the dark people
were like half shadow it wasalmost how not to put on an
event, and of course, I justkept biting my tongue because I
didn't want to squelch.
My client, she was happy.
She just wanted to do it and shedidn't seem to care that she was
in the dark and nobody couldhear her.
(13:50):
And so I didn't want to burstthat bubble, right?
Like I helped her prep, but Iremember walking away thinking,
okay, I'm not sure I want to bea part of that, and then, so I
was so excited, Sherry, cause Igot to come be at your beautiful
event.
And it was.
The complete opposite.
Like it was so professional.
It was in this beautiful space.
(14:11):
The lighting, the production,the sound, everything was like
next level.
It was amazing.
And so I'm so grateful that Istayed open.
And then I had the privilege ofhelping you tweak some vocal
things, so many great lessonsabout.
Being open and no just means notright now and not making it mean
(14:34):
stuff about you.
Yeah.
And I think, let's be clear, nois a full sentence and if some,
if someone says no and it'ssafety thing or whatever, right?
Obviously no means no.
But there are times like thiswhere I actually wasn't told no,
I just never received an answer.
And so I could have perceivedthat as a no.
(14:57):
Absolutely.
Or, go somewhere else, I couldhave gone somewhere else, even
if I was told no, there's plentyof other TEDx's that I could
have applied for.
I didn't take the lack ofresponse as a no.
I continued to take the action,even though my sensitive Sally
self, and you and I are verysimilar in that.
(15:18):
Wanted to make it all about me.
I wanted it to be like, Oh, theydidn't like me.
And it wasn't that the woman whowas organizing it literally,
this is what happened, had amassive life health.
I think meltdown, there was somemajor life catastrophe that
happened to her.
If I had been in my ego self,And I would have very easily
(15:40):
said this is all they didn'tlike me, they should have
watched my video and thoughtthat I was brilliant and given
me the best spot, or whatever.
Like they would create their ownTed just for me.
And I didn't, I was able to stayhumble through the process and
go, okay something happened,they never said no, but they
never said, yes, somethinghappened.
Let me keep pursuing this,right?
(16:01):
Until someone definitively tellsme.
And then if they do tell me no,have the humility to go
somewhere else and know thatwasn't the one that was
energetically aligned for me.
See, I love that so much.
I've been struggling with somedepression and just funk.
And I really think this was Godtoday.
Like you're interviewing Sherryfor your own sanity, because I
(16:26):
know for me too.
And I don't want to admit this,but.
I teach vulnerability andauthenticity, as do you, and
when, sometimes if I'm not in agood spiritual place, so I could
easily, if I were in your shoes,I could have easily taken that
as a no response means no, andthen where I go, because
emotionally I can be five.
(16:47):
I'm being vulnerable here,people, as I become an F.
U.
I'll take my toys and I'm gonnago somewhere else because you
don't know who I am.
And I'm not proud of that.
Or you do the other side of it,which is I'm going to take my
toys and go somewhere else, orthe other side is I'm a piece of
crap, and I'm not worthy, andthis will never happen for me,
(17:11):
and how dare I think I couldhave done this, how dare I think
that, how that's where I go.
Oh yeah, I, yeah, I vacillate.
Like a ping pong game, who doyou think you are Elaine, or, I
still have my stepmother'svoice, even though she's in the
big pharmacy in the sky, I saythat cause that was her happiest
(17:31):
place when she was in thepharmacy.
I still hear that voice, you'reno spring chicken.
I'm well aware.
I am well aware of that.
So I just love that.
And I think, it's such a greatexample of.
There's a famous quote by acomedian who says, you have to
want it more than you're afraidof it.
(17:54):
And I just think that is sojuicy, cause there's always a
good reason to not send theemail or not pick up the phone
or whatever.
I love that Sherry.
And is it okay, may I give youone little tweak I would love to
see for next time?
Yeah, of course.
But with your storytelling is, Iwant you to keep playing with
your voice.
(18:16):
Because you have, and I know Iget like excited and I can be up
here sometimes and That would bethe only thing is just to keep
playing with vocal varietybecause we want resonance and
you are a beautiful speaker.
And one of the things I thinksometimes we overlook is the
voice, the charismatic voice.
(18:37):
You know how there's some peoplewhen they're talking, you're
like, Oh, I love that voice.
James Earl Jones, who we justlost recently, so that's just
the one tiny tweak I would say.
And a lot of, women strugglewith that, myself included, so
thank you for that.
And you gave me a lot of thatcoaching, leading up to the Ted,
(18:57):
right?
You helped me with pacing andthat voice modulation, right?
Some of the movements as well.
We don't hear ourselves likeliterally we can't hear
ourselves.
And so I don't know what, do youusually advise people to record
themselves and watch themselvesjust so that they can hear that.
(19:18):
themselves.
It's so cringy, but it.
If they are new, I do not,because for some people just,
getting on camera or thinkingabout being on stage is so I
really work with them comingfrom their why and trying to
come from within and focusingon.
The person because that willhelp them be less self conscious
(19:41):
now once you've gotten over thatFirst big hurdle like I'm short
and curvy all I can see are myboobs or you know I have
sometimes I have to watch myselfon videos several times before I
can see myself Because I stillhave critical body.
What woman who doesn't, right?
And so if somebody is alreadyspeaking and yeah, this is how I
(20:04):
look.
This is how I sound.
I'm, I look amazing.
I'm 87.
Look, I look amazing.
And so I tell people I'm 87 andthen they go, wow, you look
amazing.
You can use that.
Once you've gotten over thathurdle of yeah, this is what I
do.
Then I encourage people to watchthemselves and record.
And.
Let me tell you, editingyourself, whoo, that is humbling
(20:27):
because when I'm excited, I cansound like a valley girl, which
I am like Elaine.
So that's been a rude awakening,but a good awakening.
I'm working on coming more frommy center and can I be excited
without that?
Going into the, Oh my God, I'mso excited.
(20:48):
It's Oh, Elaine, you're 56.
So thank you Sherry so much.
If people want to find you,where can they find you?
Yeah, so my website issherrysutton.
com, S H E R Y S U T O N.
com, and you can find me in allthe social places.
(21:10):
I'm under Sherry Sutton, yourmarketing mentor.
And you can also find my TEDx,and you're going to put the
notes below, but if you want to,if you guys want to Google for
it, it's called How FacebookSaved My Life and Started an
Authenticity Revolution.
Oh, I love it.
Thank you, Sherry.
This was great.
Fabulous and amazing.
(21:31):
I'm uplifted and inspired by youas always.
And thanks everybody and go makeit a great day.
Bye.
Bye.
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