March 5, 2025 • 34 mins
Have you ever wondered how to help your teen step out of their shell and fully engage with life?
In this enlightening episode of Challenge Your Mind, Change the World, we unpack the transformative power of the mindset “Always lean in, never back.”
This episode is packed with insights for parents eager to empower their teens with confidence and the skills to take initiative.
We discuss the stark difference between engagement and disengagement through vivid anecdotes, illustrating how one student's active participation can lead to a wealth of opportunities while another's reluctance holds them back.
You'll learn how easy it is to cultivate a leaning-in mentality through simple yet effective parenting strategies: modeling engagement, celebrating effort, encouraging reflections, and exposing teens to new experiences.
We also emphasize the vital role parents play in shaping this behavior. By leading through example and normalizing stepping outside comfort zones, parents can instill valuable lessons on resilience and connection in their teens.
This episode highlights how leaning in not only builds confidence but also fosters stronger relationships—skills essential for future leadership.
By the end of this episode, you'll have actionable takeaways to implement immediately. Join us as we delve into the importance of leaning in—because when your teen chooses to engage, they learn the invaluable lesson that their voice matters, paving the way for a brighter future.
Don't forget to share this episode with fellow parents and help us spread the message that success belongs to those who show up.
If you enjoyed today's episode, please take the time to rate our podcast. Your rating means the world to us and it allows us to continue to share and grow our message of support to other fabulous humans out there!
For more free resources, check out my guide to the 5 secret habits of teens who succeed. Jam packed with advice, tips and strategies. Yours free!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey everyone, welcome back to Challenge your Mind,
change the World.
This is the podcast where wedive deep into strategies that
help your very beloved andhardworking teens unlock their
potential and help you amazingparents out there support them
every step of the way.
I'm your host, francesca Hudson, and today's episode is a
(00:21):
complete game changer.
If you've ever looked at yourchild, at your teen, and thought
I just wish they would putthemselves out there more, speak
up, take more initiative,engage with what's in front of
them, then this is the episodefor you, my friend, because
today we are talking aboutsomething that, once mastered,
(00:43):
will set your teen apart in waysyou can't even imagine.
It's a simple but powerfulshift, and here it is Always
lean in, never back.
I'll say it again Always leanin, never back.
Now I know what you might bethinking.
What does that even mean,francesca?
(01:05):
Well, let me paint you apicture.
We all know someone.
Maybe it's a student in class,maybe it's a colleague at work,
maybe it's even a friend, whojust sort of exists in the
background.
They show up, but they're notfully there.
They don't speak up indiscussions, they hesitate to
volunteer and they stay in theircomfort zone because it feels
(01:29):
safe.
And then there are those people, the ones who lean in.
You can spot them immediately.
They ask questions, they engagein conversation.
They don't just sit throughlife, they participate, they
raise their hand, they try newthings, they contribute ideas.
They're the ones who end upseizing the opportunities,
(01:52):
making the connections andbuilding real confidence.
So what makes the difference?
It's not intelligence and it'snot talent.
It's a decision to engagerather than hold back.
And here's where you come in,parents, because this mindset
it's not something teensautomatically have.
(02:13):
It's something that they learn.
It's something that they'reeither encouraged to practice or
something they're subtlyconditioned to avoid.
And the way that you canapproach this at home is through
the conversations you had.
The way you praise if that, theway you model engagement in
your own life.
It has a massive impact onwhether your teen becomes
(02:35):
someone who leans in or someonewho leans back.
So in today's episode, I'm goingto give you the tools to help
your teen embrace this mindsetand explain why it's one of the
greatest gifts you can give themas they step into their future.
Because in a world where somany people are passive and what
(02:57):
I mean by that is where theysit on the sidelines and they
watch life happen.
Those of us who choose to leanin create the biggest
opportunities.
We build the strongestconfidence and ultimately change
the game.
So, parents, this episode isfor you.
Let's dive in, let's getstarted.
(03:18):
Okay, so what exactly does itmean to lean in?
It's more than justparticipating.
It's about actively engagingwith life.
It's about being present, beingcurious and being willing to
step forward even when it feelsuncomfortable.
It's about choosing to engageinstead of retreating, and this
(03:40):
shows up in so many ways.
Let me give you a couple of reallife examples.
I want you to imagine twostudents sitting in the same
classroom.
Let's call them Emily and Jake.
One of them could be yourteenager.
Emily is the kind of studentwho leans in.
She doesn't necessarily haveall the answers, but she's
(04:00):
engaged, and when the teacherasks a question, raises her hand
.
Even if she's not 100% sure,she asks for clarification.
When she doesn't understandsomething, she joins discussions
, she shares her thoughts andisn't afraid to put herself out
there.
Now let's look at Jake.
Jake is smart.
He's just as capable as Emily,but he leans back.
(04:23):
He listens to the lesson, buthe doesn't engage.
When the teacher asks aquestion, he avoids eye contact.
He doesn't speak up in groupdiscussions.
Even when he has an opinion, hewaits for others to take the
lead At the end of the schoolyear.
Who do you think benefits more?
It's not about who's smarter.
(04:44):
It's about who who's smarter,it's about who actively
participates in their ownlearning.
Now Emily is buildingconfidence, critical thinking
skills and a habit of engagementthat will serve her well in
life.
Meanwhile, jake mightunderstand the material just as
well, but because he's notengaging with it, he's missing
out on deeper learning,connection and opportunity.
(05:08):
And this isn't just aboutschool, it applies everywhere.
Let's take this idea beyond theclassroom.
Have you ever asked yourteenager a question and the
response is just a shrug, ormaybe a mumbled?
I don't know.
That's a small example ofleaning back, but as parents it
(05:28):
can be frustrating, because wesee the potential.
We see the conversations theycould be having, the
relationships they could bebuilding, the skills they could
be developing.
They just leaned in a littlemore.
But the truth is many teensdon't even realize they're doing
this.
They are choosing to disengagebecause they don't care.
(05:48):
Let's not see it as a negative.
They've just never beenencouraged to see engagement as
a skill, and engagement is askill.
It's a separate skill toanything else, and that's where
we come in.
Let me share another story.
A few years ago I worked with ateen named Mia and I'll change
(06:11):
her name to Mia for privacyreasons.
She had always been terrifiedof public speaking.
She hated presentations.
The idea of standing up infront of people made her
physically sick.
She avoided every opportunityto speak up, hoping she could
just fly under the radar.
One day she had a choice.
Her teacher asked if anyonewanted to lead a small group
(06:33):
discussion in class.
Now her instinct wasautomatically to lean back, to
wait and hope someone else wouldstep up.
But something in her shifted.
She didn't raise her hand tolead, but she did something
small she asked a question.
Instead of staying silent andhoping the discussion would move
(06:56):
along without her, she engaged,and you know what happened.
Her classmates responded.
They actually turned to her andstarted discussing her question
.
Now, that small moment ofleaning in just a little changed
her entire approach and overtime she started speaking up
more.
She volunteered for roles shenever would have considered
(07:17):
before and by the end of theyear she delivered a speech in
front of the entire school.
Not because she suddenly becamefearless overnight, but because
she practiced leaning in onesmall moment at a time.
And here's the takeaway Learningisn't about making huge,
(07:37):
dramatic changes.
It's about the tiny choicesthat we make every day.
It's asking one more question.
It's stepping forward when we'dnormally step back.
It's saying yes to anopportunity instead of
overthinking all the reasons wemight fail.
And the exciting part thismindset can be taught and
encouraged at home.
Now let's be honest leaningback is comfortable, it's easy,
(08:01):
it's safe and, as parents, it'sour job to notice when our teens
are doing it.
And there are some ways thatyou can spot it.
We all know, naturally, thatour children and our teenagers
are very comfortable in leaningback, but these questions in
particular will really help us,as parents and as educators, to
(08:23):
see where we can start toencourage some of that
confidence building and thatencouragement to get our
children and our teenagers tolean in rather than lean back.
So is your teenager avoiding eyecontact when someone asks them
a question?
Are they looking away?
Are they avoiding your eyes?
Are they hesitating to joinactivities, even when they
secretly want to?
(08:45):
Are they really into basketball, but they haven't signed up for
the basketball trials at school?
Or they really love sport, butthey haven't offered to sign up
to be a sports shed monitor.
That kind of thing Are theyanswering with short, disengaged
responses instead of engagingin conversation?
Now, these are all smallsignals that your child or
(09:07):
teenager are leaning back.
So how do we help them shift?
Well, we encourage them to takevery micro, micro, small steps
forward and, instead of lettingthem just shrug off a question,
ask, tell me more about that.
Dig a little deeper with yourchild or with your teenager.
Get them to try and elaborate,get them to try and give you a
(09:28):
little bit more than just ashrug when you ask them a
question.
Keep going, tell me more aboutthat and if they hesitate to
speak up, remind them it's okayto try even if you're not sure.
Positive encouragement, positivereinforcement, positive,
positive, positive, positive.
You look at leaders andpoliticians and people that have
(09:49):
been very successful inleadership positions and they
are always so positive and soquick to praise people, praise
people on your team for doing agreat job, great job, and so we
want to be able to have thisleader mindset with our children
and let them know that it's asafe space for them to try, even
(10:11):
if they're not sure and whenthey have weird opportunities,
gently nudged it.
What's the worst that couldhappen if you said yes?
Create a really really softlanding ground, crash pad for
them.
If they do take up anopportunity and it goes wrong,
what's the worst that couldhappen if you said yes?
Because leaning in is a habitand the more that our children
(10:35):
and our teenagers practice it,the easier it becomes.
Because let's look at the bigpicture for a second Teens who
lean in, they get noticed, theyget opportunities, they build
confidence, they develop skillsthat will serve them for a
lifetime.
And those who lean back?
Well, they might just be assmart and as capable, but they
(10:55):
miss out.
They miss out on life'sopportunities.
So, parents, the next time yousee your teen leaning back,
shrugging off an opportunity andhesitating to engage, or
holding back in conversation,pause and redirect, because
every time they choose to leanin, even just a little, they are
one step closer to becoming theconfident and engaged and
(11:17):
future ready because, let's notforget, digital age is here, the
age of AI.
Our young adults need to befuture ready for their
communication and the way thatthey show up in the world.
They have so much potential andthat's a gift worth giving the
gift of habit building to leanin rather than lean back.
(11:38):
So let me ask you this where canyou encourage your teen to lean
in?
Today?
I'll let you sit with thatquestion for a moment, because
now that we understand whatleaning in means and why it's so
powerful, let's talk about howyou, as a very loving parent,
can encourage this mindset athome.
Because here's the thingleaning in is a learned behavior
(11:59):
.
No one is born with anautomatic instinct to step
forward, to engage, to takeaction.
It's something that is shapedby the environment that we
create for our kids, and that'sgreat news, because it means
that we have the power to helpour teens build the skill, just
like we teach them how totighten shoes, ride a bike and
handle responsibilities.
So how do we do it?
(12:19):
I've got six powerful ways thatyou can implement that you can
start encouraging your teen tolean in with right now, and the
first one is lead by example.
You've probably heard thisbefore Teens watch what we do
way more than they listen towhat we say, and that is so true
when it comes to engagements.
(12:40):
Let me give you a scenario.
Imagine you're at the dinnertable and your teen is talking
about their day and you'renodding, you're making me
occasional uh-huh, but your eyesare glued to your phone and I
have been here.
We have been in this situationin our family and many years ago
, in another life, my husbandwas running a massive
(13:02):
eight-figure building companyand everything was on him,
everything was on his shouldersand he was glued to his prime.
He won't mind me saying thisbecause we're not back now and
we breathe a sigh of relief thatthose days are over.
But in the time, the stress andthe pressures that comes with
(13:22):
modern life, especially when youare running your own business
or you're in a position ofresponsibility of any kind, our
phones become an extension of us.
We never switch off.
We never, ever, ever, have thatability to leave the office and
switch off for the evening.
So I get this.
This is a very common scenarioat home that you will be nodding
(13:44):
your head and relating to.
But the sad thing is, what areour teens learning from this?
They're learning that halfengagement is normal, that it's
okay just to switch off to checkout when someone else is
talking, and we have a policy athome now that we don't have any
(14:06):
phones or digital devices atthe table, and we try very hard
to limit digital devices andwhen they're used and we make
sure that we have reallywell-structured time for other
things like reading, and when wesit around the dinner table as
a family, then that is exactlythat we're sitting there as a
(14:26):
family, catching up on our daywith no devices.
But anyway, what are our teenslearning when we have our phones
out at the dinner table andwe're not actually listening to
them?
They're learning that halfengagement is normal, that it's
okay to check out, to switch offwhen someone else is talking.
But let's pause that idea for asecond and imagine the complete
opposite.
(14:46):
Imagine putting your phone down, leaning in, making eye contact
and asking follow-up questionsthat show you're not just
hearing them but you're trulylistening.
Now, that's leading by example.
Let's take another scenario.
When you're faced withsomething new, do you embrace it
?
If you have the opportunity totake on a challenge at work or
try a new hobby or meet newpeople, do you as a parent, as
(15:08):
an adult, lean in or do you shyaway?
Because your teen is watching?
And the more they see youengage, to take initiative and
to participate in life, the morelikely they are to follow your
lead.
So if we start modeling thebehavior that we want to see at
home, then things willdramatically shift, because
engagement isn't just somethingwe tell them to do.
(15:30):
It's something they learn bywatching us.
Okay, so the second way that wecan encourage our teenagers to
lean in is to celebrateengagement over results, and
this one is huge.
As parents, we love tocelebrate results the A plus on
the test, winning goal, theaward at the end of the year,
and while accomplishments aregreat, what actually builds a
(15:52):
lean in mindset is praise in theeffort, not just the outcome.
Why?
Because when we only celebratethe end result, our teens start
to believe that only success isworth celebrating, nothing else,
only the win.
And that's dangerous.
Because what happens when theytry something new and don't
immediately succeed?
What happens to their mindset?
(16:12):
They shrink back, they stopengaging, they don't want to
risk failing because they don'tsee the value in the process.
So let's shift our focus onthat and instead of just saying,
wow, you got an A try, instead,I love how hard you worked on
that project, your effort reallyshowed.
Or you could say I noticed howengaged you were in that
(16:35):
discussion today.
What did you learn?
Or you could say I saw you pushthrough that challenge.
That took real determination.
This tells our children thatparticipation matters, that
engagement is what leads tosuccess and that, even if they
don't get a perfect result,leaning in is still so worth it.
(16:55):
So number three is to makereflection a daily habit.
Have you ever asked your teenhow was your day and got a
nothing but a shrug and a fineYep?
Me too.
And here's the thing our brainsare wired to notice what we pay
attention to.
If we never ask our teens toreflect on their engagement,
then they're not going to noticeit either.
(17:16):
So let's flip the scriptInstead of the usual.
How was school?
Flip the script Instead of theusual.
How was school?
Try this what's something thatchallenged you today?
Or you could try when did youfeel most engaged?
Or you could try this what'ssomething you leaned into today?
Ah, this new phrase leaned intotoday.
These kinds of questions trainour children's brains to start
(17:40):
paying attention to their ownparticipation rather than the
end result.
It's about the journey alongthe way, what they learn along
the way to getting from A to B,and when they start noticing
those moments, they startchoosing them more often.
Now, number four is normalize,stepping outside the comfort
(18:01):
zone.
And this one is so importantbecause, let's be honest, teens
hesitate.
They hesitate to speak up, theyhesitate to raise their hand,
hesitate to step forward when anopportunity comes their way.
Not because they're lazy orunmotivated, because they're
afraid of looking silly, bailingor even standing out, and that
(18:23):
fear, it, holds them back.
But here's what we need toremind them Confidence doesn't
come first, participation does.
The confidence will follow.
Think about it when you learnedto drive a car, you weren't
confident.
The first time you sat behindthe wheel you were probably
terrified, but you still did itand over time the confidence
(18:43):
came.
And the same goes for ourchildren and our teenagers.
They won't feel confidentspeaking up for the first time
or trying a new sport or leadinga group, but when they lean in,
despite the fear, confidencewill come.
And at the moment this issomething that we are working on
at home with our eldest that ifit doesn't come easy to him,
(19:04):
he's very reluctant to try itbecause the fear of failure, the
fear of looking silly in frontof his peers.
And so we are really, reallyworking on that mindset shift
for him and that confidence thatwhen you participate, when you
start to participate.
That's when the confidence willcome, not the other way around.
And so, as parents, our job isto normalize stepping outside
(19:27):
the comfort zone and modelingthat for our kids, to encourage
them to try, even when it'sscary, because that's where
growth happens.
Number five is to expose ourchildren to new experiences.
So this is one of the best waysto encourage a lean and
well-informed set is by puttingour children in situations where
(19:48):
they have to engage.
They have to, and this doesn'tmean forcing them into
uncomfortable situations, don'tget me wrong.
It means introducing them toexperiences that naturally
encourage participation.
Travelling, for example.
This is a huge one for me.
This is one of the biggestdrivers for me with my children
is travel.
Seeing new places forceschildren and teenagers to engage
(20:11):
, to adapt and explore.
They're in a new culture.
They're in a new language.
No one speaks their language.
They have to learn tocommunicate in ways other than
English.
They are trying new food.
They are navigating new publictransport systems all of that
kind of thing.
It is such a great way for themto have to engage.
Another way is volunteering.
(20:32):
Helping others gives ourchildren a sense of purpose and
connection, even if it'ssomething small at school, by
getting them to volunteer to dosomething.
It is giving them that realsense of leadership, that sense
of responsibility.
And the other way is trying anew hobby together.
I love this one too Somethingnew, sparse, curiosity and
(20:53):
engagement.
And we have at home these Kiwiboxes that come every month and
they're great.
You can have them for differentage groups, different interests
, and we build them together.
We get the Tinkerbox I think itis which is all about
engineering and buildingworkable models, and the kit
comes with everything in it aninstruction sheet.
(21:15):
You don't need anything else,but it's a really lovely way to
spend an hour or two with yourchildren.
So the more experiences yourteens have, the more leaning in
becomes natural.
Now, my final way to encourageyour children at home to lean in
is to teach them to seesetbacks as growth.
Now, we haven't talked aboutsetbacks much in this episode
(21:36):
yet, so let's talk aboutsetbacks now, because here's the
truth when teens fail, theirfirst instinct, first instinct
is often to lean back, to checkout, to avoid trying again to
recluse into the cave.
But failure isn't the oppositeto success, it's actually part
of it.
It's a really important part ofit, and instead of letting our
(21:58):
teens shut down.
We can help them lean in withcuriosity.
We can ask them okay, what didyou learn from this?
Or what would you dodifferently next time?
Or how can you use thisexperience to grow?
Because when failure is seen asa stepping stone, not a
roadblock, children and teensare much more likely to stay
(22:19):
engaged even when things don'tgo perfectly.
And that's how we buildresilience.
Because the teens who learn tolean in even in failure are the
ones who go on to thrive.
Because, at the end of the day,the way we respond to
engagement and to effort and tosetbacks really shapes our
teen's mindset.
(22:40):
So let's encourageparticipation over perfection.
Let's help them see failure asfeedback and let's remind them
that every time they lean in,they're building a future of
confidence and of leadership andopportunity.
And, superiors, my challengefor you is this when can you
help your teen lean in this week?
Because one small moment ofengagement today could change
(23:03):
the course of their future, sopowerful.
Okay, let's shift tack.
Now that we talked about whatleaning in means and how to
encourage it, let's take a stepback and ask the big question
why does this matter so much?
Why is this one mindset shift,choosing to engage rather than
hold back so powerful.
(23:24):
Because here's the truthsuccess doesn't belong to the
smartest, it doesn't belong tothe most talented.
It belongs to those who show up, to those who lean in.
And when teens learn to do this, it transforms every area of
their lives.
Let's break it down.
Let's look at confidence, whichis the power of believing in
(23:45):
your own voice.
When a teen practices leaningin, raising their hand, stepping
forward, speaking up, somethingincredible happens they stop
hesitating, they stop secondguessing themselves, they start
believing in their own voice.
And this is huge because, let'sbe real, self-doubt is
everywhere.
How many times have you heardyour teen say things like I
(24:08):
don't know if my answer is right, what if I sound stupid, or
I'll just wait and see whateveryone else does first?
And that hesitation, it doesn'tjust hold them back in school,
it follows them into adulthood.
But when your teen builds thehabit of leaning in, even when
they're unsure, they start torealize something life-changing
(24:30):
their voice matters, their ideasare valuable and their
participation makes a realdifference.
And that right there is thefoundation of confidence.
But it's not.
But we're not just talkingabout confidence.
We're talking aboutopportunities, because engaged
teens create their own future.
(24:50):
Let me tell you something thatmight surprise you.
The biggest opportunities inlife really go to the most
qualified person.
They go to the person who showsup.
Take it from me.
We've run eight-figurecompanies.
I have been in business forover 10 years.
My husband's been anentrepreneur pretty much his
entire adult life, and I joinedhim 10 years ago after leaving
(25:13):
teaching.
And one of the big things thatwe look for when we are
employing people and we areworking with people or we are
contracting with people and weare working with people or we
are contracting with people ishow people show up, not how
qualified they are.
How they show up.
Think about it the student whogets chosen for leadership
positions it's not always thesmartest kid.
(25:35):
It's the one who raises theirhand and steps up.
Is it the person who lands anincredible job?
No, it's not always the onewith the perfect resume.
It's the one who showsenthusiasm, builds relationships
and takes initiative.
And the teen who gets the bestmentorships or internships or
connections it's the one wholeans in and engages rather than
(25:57):
waiting for life to happen tothem.
So if we want our teens to havemore opportunities in life, the
best thing we can do is teachthem to be engaged, because the
truth is, opportunities don'tjust appear, they are created by
those who lean in.
Let's talk about something evenmore important, because life
it's not always easy.
(26:18):
There will be setbacks, therewill be rejections, there will
be moments where things don't goas planned, and here's what I
see so often in teens who havebeen conditioned to lean back.
They give up too quickly.
They avoid challenges becausethey're afraid of failing.
They take rejection personallyand assume that they're not good
enough.
But teens who lean in, on theother hand, ah, they see
(26:40):
setbacks differently.
They learn from failure insteadof fearing it.
They push through hard momentsbecause they know growth happens
when they stay engaged and theyunderstand that one no doesn't
define them.
It just means there is anotheropportunity ahead.
They don't take no as arejection, and this resilience,
(27:00):
this ability to keep going, iswhat sets them apart.
Because in life, the ones whosucceed aren't the ones who
never fail, they're the ones whofail.
They are the ones who fail wholearn, adjust and keep moving
forward.
So the more that we can supportour children through rejection
and through their no's in life,the greater the resilience
they'll build.
(27:20):
Now let's shift gears for asecond and talk about
relationships, because leaningin is not just about success,
it's about connection.
And if we want our teens tobuild strong, meaningful
relationships, they have tolearn how to engage.
Think about the differencebetween a child who sits at the
lunch table scrolling throughtheir phone waiting for someone
to talk to them and a child wholeans in, asks questions, makes
(27:44):
eye contact and shows genuineinterest in their friends, which
one is going to build deeperfriendships?
And it's the same with familytoo.
A teen who leans in duringconversations, who engages in
discussions, who activelyparticipates in their
relationships, they developstronger bonds, better
communication skills and adeeper sense of belonging.
(28:05):
And that ability it carriesinto adulthood.
Because, whether it'sfriendships, romantic
relationships or future careerconnections, the people who
succeed aren't just the smartestor the most talented.
They're the ones who know howto engage with others.
So building those strongerrelationships starts young.
It starts with our children,and we model that as parents.
(28:31):
Now, lastly, let's talk aboutleadership before we wrap things
up, because here's something alot of people get wrong
Leadership isn't about titles,it's not about being the loudest
person in the room.
It's about engagement.
Great leaders are the ones wholisten attentively, participate
fully take initiative whensomething needs to be done and
(28:52):
step forward when othershesitate.
And the best part, this startsyoung.
So we're seeing a pattern here.
Leadership relates to leaning in, and when teens develop the
habit of leaning in, they'renaturally going to become the
ones who take the lead in groupprojects, who encourage others
to step up, who make a positiveimpact in their communities and
(29:14):
who stand out in job interviewsand college applications and
beyond.
Because when you teach a teento engage with life, you're not
just preparing them for success,you're preparing them to lead,
and that comes as a bonus.
That comes as an additionalbonus to teaching our children
to lean in.
Not all of our children areborn natural leaders, and I get
(29:37):
that.
I have children too.
But when we teach them to leanin, to take new opportunities,
then the byproduct of that isleadership.
It starts to come naturally.
We can start to encourage thatvery organically, very naturally
, almost subconsciously, when weshow them and model them how to
lean in with opportunities inlife.
So, parents, here's what I wantyou to take away from today's
(30:00):
episode this one mindset shift.
It changes everything.
When a teen learns to lean in,to participate, to engage, to
step forward instead of holdingback.
They gain confidence, theystart believing in their voice,
they gain opportunities.
They see and they seize chancesthat others don't.
They learn resilience.
(30:21):
They push through challengesinstead of avoiding them.
They gain strongerrelationships, they connect more
deeply with people and theygain leadership skills.
They have the potential tostand out as future leaders and,
the best part, this issomething that we, as parents
and educators, can help thembuild, because, in the end,
success doesn't just belong tothe smartest or the most
(30:43):
talented in the room.
It belongs to those who show up, who participate, who lean in.
So, parents, here's my challengefor you this week.
You've got a few challengesI've set you today.
Look for moments where yourteen has the chance to lean in.
Maybe it's raising their handin class, or maybe it's stepping
into hand in class, or maybeit's stepping into a new social
situation, or maybe it's justsimply engaging in conversation
(31:06):
at home.
And when they do, celebrate it,encourage it, reinforce it,
because the more they practiceleaning in, the more they'll
start to realize somethingreally life-changing.
They are capable, they arevaluable and their participation
matters.
And that, my friend, that ishow we raise confident, engaged,
(31:26):
future-ready young adults.
Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode of Challenge
your Mind, change the World.
I really enjoyed this talkingabout this episode with you.
Developing leadership anddeveloping confidence with our
young people is one of my life'spassion projects.
It's something very close to myheart and it's something that I
(31:49):
hold as so dear and soimportant to my own children.
So if I have been able to helpyou with your family in any way
with this episode, I am trulyhumbled.
It's how I help young peoplewith the confidence to lead
academy and I am humbled if youhave been able to take away
anything from this episode andif this episode resonated with
(32:11):
you, share it with anotherparent who needs to hear this.
I'll see you next time andremember always lean in, never
back.
Bye for now.
Hey everyone, welcome back to Challenge your Mind,
change the World.
This is the podcast where wedive deep into strategies that
help your very beloved andhardworking teens unlock their
potential and help you amazingparents out there support them
every step of the way.
I'm your host, francesca Hudson, and today's episode is a
(00:21):
complete game changer.
If you've ever looked at yourchild, at your teen, and thought
I just wish they would putthemselves out there more, speak
up, take more initiative,engage with what's in front of
them, then this is the episodefor you, my friend, because
today we are talking aboutsomething that, once mastered,
(00:43):
will set your teen apart in waysyou can't even imagine.
It's a simple but powerfulshift, and here it is Always
lean in, never back.
I'll say it again Always leanin, never back.
Now I know what you might bethinking.
What does that even mean,francesca?
(01:05):
Well, let me paint you apicture.
We all know someone.
Maybe it's a student in class,maybe it's a colleague at work,
maybe it's even a friend, whojust sort of exists in the
background.
They show up, but they're notfully there.
They don't speak up indiscussions, they hesitate to
volunteer and they stay in theircomfort zone because it feels
(01:29):
safe.
And then there are those people, the ones who lean in.
You can spot them immediately.
They ask questions, they engagein conversation.
They don't just sit throughlife, they participate, they
raise their hand, they try newthings, they contribute ideas.
They're the ones who end upseizing the opportunities,
(01:52):
making the connections andbuilding real confidence.
So what makes the difference?
It's not intelligence and it'snot talent.
It's a decision to engagerather than hold back.
And here's where you come in,parents, because this mindset
it's not something teensautomatically have.
(02:13):
It's something that they learn.
It's something that they'reeither encouraged to practice or
something they're subtlyconditioned to avoid.
And the way that you canapproach this at home is through
the conversations you had.
The way you praise if that, theway you model engagement in
your own life.
It has a massive impact onwhether your teen becomes
(02:35):
someone who leans in or someonewho leans back.
So in today's episode, I'm goingto give you the tools to help
your teen embrace this mindsetand explain why it's one of the
greatest gifts you can give themas they step into their future.
Because in a world where somany people are passive and what
(02:57):
I mean by that is where theysit on the sidelines and they
watch life happen.
Those of us who choose to leanin create the biggest
opportunities.
We build the strongestconfidence and ultimately change
the game.
So, parents, this episode isfor you.
Let's dive in, let's getstarted.
(03:18):
Okay, so what exactly does itmean to lean in?
It's more than justparticipating.
It's about actively engagingwith life.
It's about being present, beingcurious and being willing to
step forward even when it feelsuncomfortable.
It's about choosing to engageinstead of retreating, and this
(03:40):
shows up in so many ways.
Let me give you a couple of reallife examples.
I want you to imagine twostudents sitting in the same
classroom.
Let's call them Emily and Jake.
One of them could be yourteenager.
Emily is the kind of studentwho leans in.
She doesn't necessarily haveall the answers, but she's
(04:00):
engaged, and when the teacherasks a question, raises her hand
.
Even if she's not 100% sure,she asks for clarification.
When she doesn't understandsomething, she joins discussions
, she shares her thoughts andisn't afraid to put herself out
there.
Now let's look at Jake.
Jake is smart.
He's just as capable as Emily,but he leans back.
(04:23):
He listens to the lesson, buthe doesn't engage.
When the teacher asks aquestion, he avoids eye contact.
He doesn't speak up in groupdiscussions.
Even when he has an opinion, hewaits for others to take the
lead At the end of the schoolyear.
Who do you think benefits more?
It's not about who's smarter.
(04:44):
It's about who who's smarter,it's about who actively
participates in their ownlearning.
Now Emily is buildingconfidence, critical thinking
skills and a habit of engagementthat will serve her well in
life.
Meanwhile, jake mightunderstand the material just as
well, but because he's notengaging with it, he's missing
out on deeper learning,connection and opportunity.
(05:08):
And this isn't just aboutschool, it applies everywhere.
Let's take this idea beyond theclassroom.
Have you ever asked yourteenager a question and the
response is just a shrug, ormaybe a mumbled?
I don't know.
That's a small example ofleaning back, but as parents it
(05:28):
can be frustrating, because wesee the potential.
We see the conversations theycould be having, the
relationships they could bebuilding, the skills they could
be developing.
They just leaned in a littlemore.
But the truth is many teensdon't even realize they're doing
this.
They are choosing to disengagebecause they don't care.
(05:48):
Let's not see it as a negative.
They've just never beenencouraged to see engagement as
a skill, and engagement is askill.
It's a separate skill toanything else, and that's where
we come in.
Let me share another story.
A few years ago I worked with ateen named Mia and I'll change
(06:11):
her name to Mia for privacyreasons.
She had always been terrifiedof public speaking.
She hated presentations.
The idea of standing up infront of people made her
physically sick.
She avoided every opportunityto speak up, hoping she could
just fly under the radar.
One day she had a choice.
Her teacher asked if anyonewanted to lead a small group
(06:33):
discussion in class.
Now her instinct wasautomatically to lean back, to
wait and hope someone else wouldstep up.
But something in her shifted.
She didn't raise her hand tolead, but she did something
small she asked a question.
Instead of staying silent andhoping the discussion would move
(06:56):
along without her, she engaged,and you know what happened.
Her classmates responded.
They actually turned to her andstarted discussing her question
.
Now, that small moment ofleaning in just a little changed
her entire approach and overtime she started speaking up
more.
She volunteered for roles shenever would have considered
(07:17):
before and by the end of theyear she delivered a speech in
front of the entire school.
Not because she suddenly becamefearless overnight, but because
she practiced leaning in onesmall moment at a time.
And here's the takeaway Learningisn't about making huge,
(07:37):
dramatic changes.
It's about the tiny choicesthat we make every day.
It's asking one more question.
It's stepping forward when we'dnormally step back.
It's saying yes to anopportunity instead of
overthinking all the reasons wemight fail.
And the exciting part thismindset can be taught and
encouraged at home.
Now let's be honest leaningback is comfortable, it's easy,
(08:01):
it's safe and, as parents, it'sour job to notice when our teens
are doing it.
And there are some ways thatyou can spot it.
We all know, naturally, thatour children and our teenagers
are very comfortable in leaningback, but these questions in
particular will really help us,as parents and as educators, to
(08:23):
see where we can start toencourage some of that
confidence building and thatencouragement to get our
children and our teenagers tolean in rather than lean back.
So is your teenager avoiding eyecontact when someone asks them
a question?
Are they looking away?
Are they avoiding your eyes?
Are they hesitating to joinactivities, even when they
secretly want to?
(08:45):
Are they really into basketball, but they haven't signed up for
the basketball trials at school?
Or they really love sport, butthey haven't offered to sign up
to be a sports shed monitor.
That kind of thing Are theyanswering with short, disengaged
responses instead of engagingin conversation?
Now, these are all smallsignals that your child or
(09:07):
teenager are leaning back.
So how do we help them shift?
Well, we encourage them to takevery micro, micro, small steps
forward and, instead of lettingthem just shrug off a question,
ask, tell me more about that.
Dig a little deeper with yourchild or with your teenager.
Get them to try and elaborate,get them to try and give you a
(09:28):
little bit more than just ashrug when you ask them a
question.
Keep going, tell me more aboutthat and if they hesitate to
speak up, remind them it's okayto try even if you're not sure.
Positive encouragement, positivereinforcement, positive,
positive, positive, positive.
You look at leaders andpoliticians and people that have
(09:49):
been very successful inleadership positions and they
are always so positive and soquick to praise people, praise
people on your team for doing agreat job, great job, and so we
want to be able to have thisleader mindset with our children
and let them know that it's asafe space for them to try, even
(10:11):
if they're not sure and whenthey have weird opportunities,
gently nudged it.
What's the worst that couldhappen if you said yes?
Create a really really softlanding ground, crash pad for
them.
If they do take up anopportunity and it goes wrong,
what's the worst that couldhappen if you said yes?
Because leaning in is a habitand the more that our children
(10:35):
and our teenagers practice it,the easier it becomes.
Because let's look at the bigpicture for a second Teens who
lean in, they get noticed, theyget opportunities, they build
confidence, they develop skillsthat will serve them for a
lifetime.
And those who lean back?
Well, they might just be assmart and as capable, but they
(10:55):
miss out.
They miss out on life'sopportunities.
So, parents, the next time yousee your teen leaning back,
shrugging off an opportunity andhesitating to engage, or
holding back in conversation,pause and redirect, because
every time they choose to leanin, even just a little, they are
one step closer to becoming theconfident and engaged and
(11:17):
future ready because, let's notforget, digital age is here, the
age of AI.
Our young adults need to befuture ready for their
communication and the way thatthey show up in the world.
They have so much potential andthat's a gift worth giving the
gift of habit building to leanin rather than lean back.
(11:38):
So let me ask you this where canyou encourage your teen to lean
in?
Today?
I'll let you sit with thatquestion for a moment, because
now that we understand whatleaning in means and why it's so
powerful, let's talk about howyou, as a very loving parent,
can encourage this mindset athome.
Because here's the thingleaning in is a learned behavior
(11:59):
.
No one is born with anautomatic instinct to step
forward, to engage, to takeaction.
It's something that is shapedby the environment that we
create for our kids, and that'sgreat news, because it means
that we have the power to helpour teens build the skill, just
like we teach them how totighten shoes, ride a bike and
handle responsibilities.
So how do we do it?
(12:19):
I've got six powerful ways thatyou can implement that you can
start encouraging your teen tolean in with right now, and the
first one is lead by example.
You've probably heard thisbefore Teens watch what we do
way more than they listen towhat we say, and that is so true
when it comes to engagements.
(12:40):
Let me give you a scenario.
Imagine you're at the dinnertable and your teen is talking
about their day and you'renodding, you're making me
occasional uh-huh, but your eyesare glued to your phone and I
have been here.
We have been in this situationin our family and many years ago
, in another life, my husbandwas running a massive
(13:02):
eight-figure building companyand everything was on him,
everything was on his shouldersand he was glued to his prime.
He won't mind me saying thisbecause we're not back now and
we breathe a sigh of relief thatthose days are over.
But in the time, the stress andthe pressures that comes with
(13:22):
modern life, especially when youare running your own business
or you're in a position ofresponsibility of any kind, our
phones become an extension of us.
We never switch off.
We never, ever, ever, have thatability to leave the office and
switch off for the evening.
So I get this.
This is a very common scenarioat home that you will be nodding
(13:44):
your head and relating to.
But the sad thing is, what areour teens learning from this?
They're learning that halfengagement is normal, that it's
okay just to switch off to checkout when someone else is
talking, and we have a policy athome now that we don't have any
(14:06):
phones or digital devices atthe table, and we try very hard
to limit digital devices andwhen they're used and we make
sure that we have reallywell-structured time for other
things like reading, and when wesit around the dinner table as
a family, then that is exactlythat we're sitting there as a
(14:26):
family, catching up on our daywith no devices.
But anyway, what are our teenslearning when we have our phones
out at the dinner table andwe're not actually listening to
them?
They're learning that halfengagement is normal, that it's
okay to check out, to switch offwhen someone else is talking.
But let's pause that idea for asecond and imagine the complete
opposite.
(14:46):
Imagine putting your phone down, leaning in, making eye contact
and asking follow-up questionsthat show you're not just
hearing them but you're trulylistening.
Now, that's leading by example.
Let's take another scenario.
When you're faced withsomething new, do you embrace it
?
If you have the opportunity totake on a challenge at work or
try a new hobby or meet newpeople, do you as a parent, as
(15:08):
an adult, lean in or do you shyaway?
Because your teen is watching?
And the more they see youengage, to take initiative and
to participate in life, the morelikely they are to follow your
lead.
So if we start modeling thebehavior that we want to see at
home, then things willdramatically shift, because
engagement isn't just somethingwe tell them to do.
(15:30):
It's something they learn bywatching us.
Okay, so the second way that wecan encourage our teenagers to
lean in is to celebrateengagement over results, and
this one is huge.
As parents, we love tocelebrate results the A plus on
the test, winning goal, theaward at the end of the year,
and while accomplishments aregreat, what actually builds a
(15:52):
lean in mindset is praise in theeffort, not just the outcome.
Why?
Because when we only celebratethe end result, our teens start
to believe that only success isworth celebrating, nothing else,
only the win.
And that's dangerous.
Because what happens when theytry something new and don't
immediately succeed?
What happens to their mindset?
(16:12):
They shrink back, they stopengaging, they don't want to
risk failing because they don'tsee the value in the process.
So let's shift our focus onthat and instead of just saying,
wow, you got an A try, instead,I love how hard you worked on
that project, your effort reallyshowed.
Or you could say I noticed howengaged you were in that
(16:35):
discussion today.
What did you learn?
Or you could say I saw you pushthrough that challenge.
That took real determination.
This tells our children thatparticipation matters, that
engagement is what leads tosuccess and that, even if they
don't get a perfect result,leaning in is still so worth it.
(16:55):
So number three is to makereflection a daily habit.
Have you ever asked your teenhow was your day and got a
nothing but a shrug and a fineYep?
Me too.
And here's the thing our brainsare wired to notice what we pay
attention to.
If we never ask our teens toreflect on their engagement,
then they're not going to noticeit either.
(17:16):
So let's flip the scriptInstead of the usual.
How was school?
Flip the script Instead of theusual.
How was school?
Try this what's something thatchallenged you today?
Or you could try when did youfeel most engaged?
Or you could try this what'ssomething you leaned into today?
Ah, this new phrase leaned intotoday.
These kinds of questions trainour children's brains to start
(17:40):
paying attention to their ownparticipation rather than the
end result.
It's about the journey alongthe way, what they learn along
the way to getting from A to B,and when they start noticing
those moments, they startchoosing them more often.
Now, number four is normalize,stepping outside the comfort
(18:01):
zone.
And this one is so importantbecause, let's be honest, teens
hesitate.
They hesitate to speak up, theyhesitate to raise their hand,
hesitate to step forward when anopportunity comes their way.
Not because they're lazy orunmotivated, because they're
afraid of looking silly, bailingor even standing out, and that
(18:23):
fear, it, holds them back.
But here's what we need toremind them Confidence doesn't
come first, participation does.
The confidence will follow.
Think about it when you learnedto drive a car, you weren't
confident.
The first time you sat behindthe wheel you were probably
terrified, but you still did itand over time the confidence
(18:43):
came.
And the same goes for ourchildren and our teenagers.
They won't feel confidentspeaking up for the first time
or trying a new sport or leadinga group, but when they lean in,
despite the fear, confidencewill come.
And at the moment this issomething that we are working on
at home with our eldest that ifit doesn't come easy to him,
(19:04):
he's very reluctant to try itbecause the fear of failure, the
fear of looking silly in frontof his peers.
And so we are really, reallyworking on that mindset shift
for him and that confidence thatwhen you participate, when you
start to participate.
That's when the confidence willcome, not the other way around.
And so, as parents, our job isto normalize stepping outside
(19:27):
the comfort zone and modelingthat for our kids, to encourage
them to try, even when it'sscary, because that's where
growth happens.
Number five is to expose ourchildren to new experiences.
So this is one of the best waysto encourage a lean and
well-informed set is by puttingour children in situations where
(19:48):
they have to engage.
They have to, and this doesn'tmean forcing them into
uncomfortable situations, don'tget me wrong.
It means introducing them toexperiences that naturally
encourage participation.
Travelling, for example.
This is a huge one for me.
This is one of the biggestdrivers for me with my children
is travel.
Seeing new places forceschildren and teenagers to engage
(20:11):
, to adapt and explore.
They're in a new culture.
They're in a new language.
No one speaks their language.
They have to learn tocommunicate in ways other than
English.
They are trying new food.
They are navigating new publictransport systems all of that
kind of thing.
It is such a great way for themto have to engage.
Another way is volunteering.
(20:32):
Helping others gives ourchildren a sense of purpose and
connection, even if it'ssomething small at school, by
getting them to volunteer to dosomething.
It is giving them that realsense of leadership, that sense
of responsibility.
And the other way is trying anew hobby together.
I love this one too Somethingnew, sparse, curiosity and
(20:53):
engagement.
And we have at home these Kiwiboxes that come every month and
they're great.
You can have them for differentage groups, different interests
, and we build them together.
We get the Tinkerbox I think itis which is all about
engineering and buildingworkable models, and the kit
comes with everything in it aninstruction sheet.
(21:15):
You don't need anything else,but it's a really lovely way to
spend an hour or two with yourchildren.
So the more experiences yourteens have, the more leaning in
becomes natural.
Now, my final way to encourageyour children at home to lean in
is to teach them to seesetbacks as growth.
Now, we haven't talked aboutsetbacks much in this episode
(21:36):
yet, so let's talk aboutsetbacks now, because here's the
truth when teens fail, theirfirst instinct, first instinct
is often to lean back, to checkout, to avoid trying again to
recluse into the cave.
But failure isn't the oppositeto success, it's actually part
of it.
It's a really important part ofit, and instead of letting our
(21:58):
teens shut down.
We can help them lean in withcuriosity.
We can ask them okay, what didyou learn from this?
Or what would you dodifferently next time?
Or how can you use thisexperience to grow?
Because when failure is seen asa stepping stone, not a
roadblock, children and teensare much more likely to stay
(22:19):
engaged even when things don'tgo perfectly.
And that's how we buildresilience.
Because the teens who learn tolean in even in failure are the
ones who go on to thrive.
Because, at the end of the day,the way we respond to
engagement and to effort and tosetbacks really shapes our
teen's mindset.
(22:40):
So let's encourageparticipation over perfection.
Let's help them see failure asfeedback and let's remind them
that every time they lean in,they're building a future of
confidence and of leadership andopportunity.
And, superiors, my challengefor you is this when can you
help your teen lean in this week?
Because one small moment ofengagement today could change
(23:03):
the course of their future, sopowerful.
Okay, let's shift tack.
Now that we talked about whatleaning in means and how to
encourage it, let's take a stepback and ask the big question
why does this matter so much?
Why is this one mindset shift,choosing to engage rather than
hold back so powerful.
(23:24):
Because here's the truthsuccess doesn't belong to the
smartest, it doesn't belong tothe most talented.
It belongs to those who show up, to those who lean in.
And when teens learn to do this, it transforms every area of
their lives.
Let's break it down.
Let's look at confidence, whichis the power of believing in
(23:45):
your own voice.
When a teen practices leaningin, raising their hand, stepping
forward, speaking up, somethingincredible happens they stop
hesitating, they stop secondguessing themselves, they start
believing in their own voice.
And this is huge because, let'sbe real, self-doubt is
everywhere.
How many times have you heardyour teen say things like I
(24:08):
don't know if my answer is right, what if I sound stupid, or
I'll just wait and see whateveryone else does first?
And that hesitation, it doesn'tjust hold them back in school,
it follows them into adulthood.
But when your teen builds thehabit of leaning in, even when
they're unsure, they start torealize something life-changing
(24:30):
their voice matters, their ideasare valuable and their
participation makes a realdifference.
And that right there is thefoundation of confidence.
But it's not.
But we're not just talkingabout confidence.
We're talking aboutopportunities, because engaged
teens create their own future.
(24:50):
Let me tell you something thatmight surprise you.
The biggest opportunities inlife really go to the most
qualified person.
They go to the person who showsup.
Take it from me.
We've run eight-figurecompanies.
I have been in business forover 10 years.
My husband's been anentrepreneur pretty much his
entire adult life, and I joinedhim 10 years ago after leaving
(25:13):
teaching.
And one of the big things thatwe look for when we are
employing people and we areworking with people or we are
contracting with people and weare working with people or we
are contracting with people ishow people show up, not how
qualified they are.
How they show up.
Think about it the student whogets chosen for leadership
positions it's not always thesmartest kid.
(25:35):
It's the one who raises theirhand and steps up.
Is it the person who lands anincredible job?
No, it's not always the onewith the perfect resume.
It's the one who showsenthusiasm, builds relationships
and takes initiative.
And the teen who gets the bestmentorships or internships or
connections it's the one wholeans in and engages rather than
(25:57):
waiting for life to happen tothem.
So if we want our teens to havemore opportunities in life, the
best thing we can do is teachthem to be engaged, because the
truth is, opportunities don'tjust appear, they are created by
those who lean in.
Let's talk about something evenmore important, because life
it's not always easy.
(26:18):
There will be setbacks, therewill be rejections, there will
be moments where things don't goas planned, and here's what I
see so often in teens who havebeen conditioned to lean back.
They give up too quickly.
They avoid challenges becausethey're afraid of failing.
They take rejection personallyand assume that they're not good
enough.
But teens who lean in, on theother hand, ah, they see
(26:40):
setbacks differently.
They learn from failure insteadof fearing it.
They push through hard momentsbecause they know growth happens
when they stay engaged and theyunderstand that one no doesn't
define them.
It just means there is anotheropportunity ahead.
They don't take no as arejection, and this resilience,
(27:00):
this ability to keep going, iswhat sets them apart.
Because in life, the ones whosucceed aren't the ones who
never fail, they're the ones whofail.
They are the ones who fail wholearn, adjust and keep moving
forward.
So the more that we can supportour children through rejection
and through their no's in life,the greater the resilience
they'll build.
(27:20):
Now let's shift gears for asecond and talk about
relationships, because leaningin is not just about success,
it's about connection.
And if we want our teens tobuild strong, meaningful
relationships, they have tolearn how to engage.
Think about the differencebetween a child who sits at the
lunch table scrolling throughtheir phone waiting for someone
to talk to them and a child wholeans in, asks questions, makes
(27:44):
eye contact and shows genuineinterest in their friends, which
one is going to build deeperfriendships?
And it's the same with familytoo.
A teen who leans in duringconversations, who engages in
discussions, who activelyparticipates in their
relationships, they developstronger bonds, better
communication skills and adeeper sense of belonging.
(28:05):
And that ability it carriesinto adulthood.
Because, whether it'sfriendships, romantic
relationships or future careerconnections, the people who
succeed aren't just the smartestor the most talented.
They're the ones who know howto engage with others.
So building those strongerrelationships starts young.
It starts with our children,and we model that as parents.
(28:31):
Now, lastly, let's talk aboutleadership before we wrap things
up, because here's something alot of people get wrong
Leadership isn't about titles,it's not about being the loudest
person in the room.
It's about engagement.
Great leaders are the ones wholisten attentively, participate
fully take initiative whensomething needs to be done and
(28:52):
step forward when othershesitate.
And the best part, this startsyoung.
So we're seeing a pattern here.
Leadership relates to leaning in, and when teens develop the
habit of leaning in, they'renaturally going to become the
ones who take the lead in groupprojects, who encourage others
to step up, who make a positiveimpact in their communities and
(29:14):
who stand out in job interviewsand college applications and
beyond.
Because when you teach a teento engage with life, you're not
just preparing them for success,you're preparing them to lead,
and that comes as a bonus.
That comes as an additionalbonus to teaching our children
to lean in.
Not all of our children areborn natural leaders, and I get
(29:37):
that.
I have children too.
But when we teach them to leanin, to take new opportunities,
then the byproduct of that isleadership.
It starts to come naturally.
We can start to encourage thatvery organically, very naturally
, almost subconsciously, when weshow them and model them how to
lean in with opportunities inlife.
So, parents, here's what I wantyou to take away from today's
(30:00):
episode this one mindset shift.
It changes everything.
When a teen learns to lean in,to participate, to engage, to
step forward instead of holdingback.
They gain confidence, theystart believing in their voice,
they gain opportunities.
They see and they seize chancesthat others don't.
They learn resilience.
(30:21):
They push through challengesinstead of avoiding them.
They gain strongerrelationships, they connect more
deeply with people and theygain leadership skills.
They have the potential tostand out as future leaders and,
the best part, this issomething that we, as parents
and educators, can help thembuild, because, in the end,
success doesn't just belong tothe smartest or the most
(30:43):
talented in the room.
It belongs to those who show up, who participate, who lean in.
So, parents, here's my challengefor you this week.
You've got a few challengesI've set you today.
Look for moments where yourteen has the chance to lean in.
Maybe it's raising their handin class, or maybe it's stepping
into hand in class, or maybeit's stepping into a new social
situation, or maybe it's justsimply engaging in conversation
(31:06):
at home.
And when they do, celebrate it,encourage it, reinforce it,
because the more they practiceleaning in, the more they'll
start to realize somethingreally life-changing.
They are capable, they arevaluable and their participation
matters.
And that, my friend, that ishow we raise confident, engaged,
(31:26):
future-ready young adults.
Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode of Challenge
your Mind, change the World.
I really enjoyed this talkingabout this episode with you.
Developing leadership anddeveloping confidence with our
young people is one of my life'spassion projects.
It's something very close to myheart and it's something that I
(31:49):
hold as so dear and soimportant to my own children.
So if I have been able to helpyou with your family in any way
with this episode, I am trulyhumbled.
It's how I help young peoplewith the confidence to lead
academy and I am humbled if youhave been able to take away
anything from this episode andif this episode resonated with
(32:11):
you, share it with anotherparent who needs to hear this.
I'll see you next time andremember always lean in, never
back.
Bye for now.
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