June 24, 2023 • 42 mins
When my sister-in-law, Sunshine, faced the most challenging battle of her life against COVID-19, she found strength in natural healing remedies and a powerful support system. In our latest episode, we share her incredible journey, from her missionary background to fighting for her life in a hospital. Discover how her passion for adoption, apothecary, and the power of natural remedies played a pivotal role in her survival.
As Sunshine recounts her terrifying COVID-19 ordeal, we discuss the importance of having a support system and the complexities of modern pharmaceuticals. Learn how her knowledge of natural remedies, such as Lion's Mane mushrooms, helped her overcome pneumonia, and how pranayama breathing techniques aided her recovery. Listen as she shares her harrowing experiences in overcrowded hospitals, her fight against ARDS, and how visualization and support from loved ones kept her going.
Finally, join us as we explore the spiritual transformation Sunshine experienced after her near-death experience and the importance of finding purpose in life. Be inspired by her story of following intuition and listening to the Holy Spirit, as well as her parents' influence on her sense of purpose. Sunshine's journey serves as a powerful reminder to live fully and cherish every moment, and we're honored to share her story with you.
www.thechatterboxradio.com
www.carriefarris.com
Thank you for listening to our show! If you are looking for meditations, breathing exercises, yoga or aerial yoga (@CarrieAIRYoga), we've got that too! Check out our YouTube videos Especially developed to increase brain flow, stimulate the vagus nerve and relieve stress. If you are on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube or Twitter, click and follow! You are apart of other people's healing. Join me and let's make this planet a little nicer.
For Sponsorships & Promos, contact:
www.carriefarris.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Look who I have today such a Ferris, the sweetest
sister-in-law.
She's amazing.
I'm so excited that she's herewith me today.
Again, it was just kind of arandom thing It seems to be
random things And I've known hersince I think you were 16 years
old.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Last time Was it 17?
, 16 or 17.
I think I was 17.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Yeah, I can tell you that it's just really amazing.
It's the first time I met her.
When she came over It was justinstant, like instant click with
you.
And when you left my housebecause you were dating my
brother-in-law and Adam and Iwere already married, living in
a house and you came over Andafter you left I looked at him
(00:47):
and he goes, she's so cool, AndI think I said, I think I just
met my sister, Yeah, Yeah, Andshe's 17, 16, 17, whatever I
knew then And I was likespiritually she is like a
40-year-old, Like spirituallyshe's so grown up and she's so
in tune.
So I want you to tell everyonea little bit about yourself and
(01:11):
the history and how you grew up.
Just real quick.
Your parents were missionaries.
You traveled around, Yeah, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
And maybe your mom and dad became missionaries when
I think it was like two Andtheir first ministry just like
newly saved, like the wholething their first ministry was
being sent to some mountains inMexico to be orphan parents of
this beautiful little family oflike 20-something orphans.
(01:41):
And there was another couplethat was there and then a couple
that was sent with them, and itwas just really awesome growing
up in something like that, yeah, and I feel like it's always
been in my heart to adoptbecause of that And we just yeah
, just hasn't not the right timeyet, you know like, but we've
been talking about it for years,so it's like, maybe one of
these days.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
And you have four boys.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Yes, i do, and you're married, and how long have you
been married?
We just celebrated 20 years.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
You did, yeah, congratulations.
It's hard to keep up witheverybody.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
I know It's just.
it's been a crazy cool ride forsure.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
So I initially contacted you because of Lion's
Mane mushrooms that you can getover the counter And I had never
heard of this And Sunshinelives in Missouri now and she
was down visiting And I hadheard about Lion's Mane and
she's always like what would youcall yourself in the apothecary
world?
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I'm like forever studying.
I'll never arrive, but I'mstudying herbalism and natural
path remedies, herbs, like allthose things you can think of.
So I call myself an apothecarybecause, you know, God brings
people into my life and I'm like, hey, have you tried this.
You know like andcertifications take a really,
(02:57):
really long time.
So I'm looking to be anapprentice right now with a lady
, but I'm just it's.
you know it all happens inGod's time.
Oh, it does, and this has beenyour journey as long as.
I've known you.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
Like you've always been your healer and you seek
from the earth to heal your bodywith different things.
So I knew I was talking to theright person.
you know about the mushroomsbecause I heard that it helps
with Alzheimer's prevention Andmy dad passed of Alzheimer's
very quickly at the end.
but looking back, you know hehad gotten it so young And you
(03:34):
know it makes me worry and thinkabout that as well.
So someone had told me about it.
So then I went to Guru here andshe's like yes, and it helps
with this.
And oh, did you know that it'san antidepressant?
And I was like no, but I waswondering why I was so dang
happy when I was cleaning thehouse, because I was, and I was
(03:55):
just laughing, and so it's beenprobably a month And what I've
learned is it really matters howyou get it, where you get it,
it's not psychedelic.
I got mine at the little localcompound pharmacy down the
street.
And the benefits that I'venoticed just in a few weeks,
(04:15):
with the clarity, the brain fog,and so I reached out to
Sunshine going tell me more.
So we hooked up online whileshe was in Missouri And I had no
idea the conversation that cameout of that And, lo and behold,
she was already coming here thefollowing Friday.
So I was like, please, we justcome tell the story, because it
(04:40):
is so moving and so touching.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I'm getting chills all over my body.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
So I'm going to stop talking now and I'm going to let
you talk.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Okay, all right, so I knew a lot about the mushrooms
and things and herbs and stufflike that before all this, but
now there's something to applyit to.
So it's crazy how that allworked.
So I already have the knowledgeand then knowing how to heal
myself later, yeah, So it's sucha benefit that you already knew
(05:13):
this.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
So when this particular event happened, you
knew what to do.
right, Absolutely Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
And I feel like some things that I knew, like even
like I'll talk about the yogatoo even the things that I knew
helped me get me out of there.
So it was 22.
Yeah, yeah, because mom passedNovember of 21 and then it was
just a few months later And Ibecame really ill with pneumonia
(05:41):
and I get pneumonia like everytwo years, it's a thing.
So coming to find out there waslike I have parasites in my
lungs, so that's why.
So I learned that later, but itwent undiagnosed, because I
went in for help and this islike a whole new healthcare
system to me, right?
So I don't have my people tolike.
I'll be like hey, you know, drRamirez, like it's pneumonia
(06:02):
again in Wimberley.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
It's new people.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
So I'm like I'm pretty sure it's this.
You're like well, we're testingall this because it looks like
a UTI, so they're taking all theother tests right.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
So I go-.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Was this a holistic doctor or was it just No, no, no
, it was a surgeon care, likeyou know it goes undiagnosed and
I go home and they send me homewith like a high prescribed
Tylenol for my head, right,because my head was hurting
pretty bad.
Then, on top of that, it wentundiagnosed and then I was
somehow exposed to COVID-19,because then all of a sudden I
(06:35):
can't breathe.
Walking up the stairs And I wastelling you the story about
like the in-laws were over andeverybody's hanging out and I
stayed home because I was so Icouldn't go anywhere.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I'm so tired So you've gone to the emergency
room.
they just kind of gave you Theysent me home.
Did they give you like anantibiotic or anything, or
pretty much like here's apainkiller, you'll get over it.
No antibiotic, nope.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Okay, and then they do-.
they just sent me home and itwas about three days later and
that's when it starts hitting meeven harder, and I had dry with
me that day and I'm just liketrying to keep this little baby
happy, you know, and he's sochill, so he's like And at this
point.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
he was what two He yeah, he was He was little bitty
, he was Okay, yeah, he had justturned three.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Yeah, he's running around, but with his autism he
doesn't he's non-verbal, so helike points at things, you know.
So it's like okay, he wantslike toast or bread.
So, like I did my could I givehim the bread and I just laid on
the couch and I was in and outlike it was.
so shocking to me is like howtired I was and I'd like go to
sleep and I'd wake up and I'mlike, oh my gosh, like I've been
asleep, oh, my gosh, it's scary, and it's that mom sleep, you
(07:42):
know, like you can hear what'shappening, you know and like
That's a good analogy.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
The mom sleep.
Yeah, the mom sleep.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
The hum is on and on the TV and then you can hear
like what's happening around you.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
So he wanted something downstairs.
So I go downstairs And inMissouri it's split level, so,
like, all your upstairs is yourmain housing, oh, ok, so that's
where we were The living room,the kitchen's up there,
everything And then downstairsis all the bedrooms, like the
boys' bedrooms, right?
So I go down to get himwhatever he needed And on my way
back up I stop and I can't makeit up the stairs anymore And
(08:17):
I'm out of breath, likeeverything I'm just done And my
body is hurting so bad.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
And no oxygen.
probably I have nothing.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yes, there was no oxygen And I didn't know.
Like I was just tired, musteredup, go to the couch, get to the
phone.
I called Josh and he's likewe're on our way right now, like
everything's done, so they getthere.
And later that night I was justso done.
I'm like please take me to thehospital.
I don't know what's wrong withme.
I'm just definitely not anybetter.
You know, i feel so much worse.
(08:46):
So he takes me to the emergencyroom of this one hospital And I
wait almost eight hours in thewaiting room And I'm like I sit
by the bathroom because everytime I cough I pee myself.
Yeah, but the cough is soviolent Like it's literally like
even if I didn't have like Ipee on myself.
So I would like cough and go tothe bathroom and then come back
(09:06):
.
And I sat there and the nursecame over and she swabbed me.
She came back.
They knew I was positive forpneumonia and COVID-19.
And they made me wait and waitand wait And they kept letting
other people come in.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Did they quarantine you?
No, they left her there.
Perfect, they left, i know Theyjust left me there.
And people were all like theydidn't have it.
I'm so tired.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Like I have to go to sleep.
I told her I'm like I can't.
We went in at 11 o'clock atnight.
I'm like I'm so tired Like Ineed to lay down.
And they're like, well, we'redoing the best we can.
There's no pods available Andthey had just let like the sweet
80-year-old couple through Andthey're just like, yeah, we
think we're positive And they'reperfectly like way more OK than
(09:52):
I was.
You know what I'm saying?
That's so sad, i'm dying overhere literally.
And you're like they took twopods And then I'm leaving And I
go.
And I actually watched themleave before I go.
They took care of them andeverything.
And I tell the nurse I'm like Ineed to go lay down.
So I put two chairs together.
I'm like, please come get mewhen it's my turn.
Seriously, i'm not OK And Ihave high pain tolerance.
(10:17):
I'm really nice.
You know what I mean.
So it's one of these like Idon't look like I need to be
helped immediately.
So, that really was to mydetriment.
So I go sleep, sleep it off fora little bit, and then they
come and get me And they put mein the pod And by this point the
brain fog has taken over AndI'm like I'm woozy, i can't even
(10:37):
sit up without anything.
They hook me up to a littleoxygen lying in the bed, my
head's pounding because theheadache hasn't gone away from
the first time I went in.
The doctor finally comes in andhe's standing way back in the
corner like far, far away fromme, and his hands are crossed
and he's leaning up against thewall And of course we're all
(10:59):
masked up.
I can't see his mouth movingand I can't hear what he's
saying.
He's like mumbling And becauseof the brain fog I'm trying to
rub my eye so I can hear itbetter.
I'm like remember you telling methat I can't even like what's
happening here, So I'm likeopening my eyes, Like that's
somehow.
It makes me so frustrated,somehow like try to hear what he
(11:19):
has to say.
And I'm like squinting my eyesand looking at him And all I
could think was number one wherethe hell is Josh?
Why won't they let my husbandbe here with me?
Because I need him here to helpme understand what's happening.
And I'm like I'm 41.
I'm in great health, like yeah,with mom's death, like I got a
(11:39):
little depressed and might haveprobably gained a little bit of
weight at that point.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
But I was being any, maybe have dropped with the
stress a little bit, but there'sno way.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Like I'm any of the things where this should be a
problem for me.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
So all I can hear him say was well, there's this
thing we can try on you, butthere hasn't been a lot of
research on it, so I'm not sureit's something you even want to
do.
Like he's trying to talk me outof something He's like, or I
can send you home with someantibiotics, and then I think he
never even said, and then wecan admit to you, or anything
like that.
All he said was give you someof this new stuff And then I
(12:16):
don't know if you want to try itor not, kind of kind of whole
thing right.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
So I was like not a lot of really clear direction.
There's nothing Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
And so I'm like this isn't my brain fog, like I'm
hearing him say these words,right, and then he says, or I
can give you some antibioticsand oxygen machine, and then you
can, we'll just send you home.
And I was like I just want togo home, like I'm just thinking
in my head like I can't be hereanymore, not with these people.
Like I just I don't feel right.
You know how you know someplaces, like it's just some guy
(12:44):
came in and gave me a littleroller oxygen machine.
They handed me some paperwork.
I'm like, oh, here, you're goodto go.
And I'm like, coming in there,like I couldn't even like stand
up without wanting to sit backdown, because it was so heavy in
my chest And I couldn't, icouldn't breathe long enough, so
I put, they put the oxygenmachine on me And I literally
(13:05):
had to walk myself from that pod, which was just like a room
kind of thing, all the waythrough and back and outside.
And outside it was likenegative two, like no, and I had
to wait, like I had to wait forJosh.
I'd call him at some point andbe like, okay, i'm ready to go.
And he had to get taken to theboys' school already.
He had Jariah, so he had tomake his way all the way back to
(13:27):
me And it's a good 25-minutedrive at least from our house.
They prescribed an oxygenmachine, so the hospital brought
one, or the text, came over andset it up and showed Josh how
to use it.
And then there's this longpiece of paper and it kind of
tells you not even full blast,we left it on, whatever it told
(13:50):
us to leave it on, and then Iliterally just started dying
over the next week and a halfBecause I wasn't taking anything
to help it.
Josh was pumping me full ofsupplements and he was on the
phone with anybody he couldpossibly think of that knew
enough to help him.
So we have a friend here inWembley.
(14:11):
Her mom is a doctor in FloridaAnd she had been bringing
patients back from the deadnonstop, so she had a great
success rate And he had beencalling Leslie, my best friend,
and trying to figure out Andthat's how he was hooking up.
And then I have my friend CammyRemember Cammy?
And she's an atropath herselfAnd she's been through crazy
(14:31):
stuff of her own health-wise.
So it was so bad that I neededintervention And I needed a hell
of a lot more oxygen than thatmachine was ever going to give
me.
You know, it was just so bad.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So Josh was giving you a medicine Like, because
Like an over-accounter.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Yeah, over-the-counter.
So like the horse medicine,dewormer or whatever.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Oh, i heard about that, did Joe.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Grogan, take that or something like that And like and
that's just-, does it help?
Did it help If you take itearly on enough?
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Wow, ok, did you take that?
Speaker 2 (15:07):
I did Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
And it helped.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
It was helping me not die OK, because it was so bad
Like I needed I would haveneeded.
So whatever is in there, itwould have needed to have been
way more potent for it to kill.
Was it strong enough, yeah,whatever.
And it wouldn't have matteredlike how much I would have taken
.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
It's just the fact that that's only meant for a
certain stage of whatever ishappening in your body, maybe
right before, early on, but atthis point, girl, you are going
to save you.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
So what happens is is like when you're taking things
like that and then like thefembendental I think it's how
you say it and that's for likegoats, right, right.
The whole idea behind that isthat it stops the reproduction
of your, of the cell growth ofthat thing in your body.
And that's it.
So, when they like, use it fora dewormer And like if you go
back to the history of all thesethings being made, they're for
(16:00):
people, they just give them toanimals.
OK, OK And then the pharmacywants to make money, so they
separate the human version ofthose things, so that they'll
make money.
Interesting, oh my God.
And you can watch Joe Rogan andhe'll tell you all about the
pharmacy and how it's the devil.
because of how much money.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah, yeah.
And in Latin the word from afrom a company We've talked
about that Looked at thatscripture Yep So it's, it's just
one of those things whereyou're just like, oh, like, come
on people.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
So it makes it so hard when you want to like do it
for yourself Like I, want tolike kill my own family and
stuff, but so I So you're dying.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
This isn't working.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Every day, every day just getting close to the death
and literally like he gets onthe tele-doc.
He gets a tele-doc on with me,finally, gets somebody to come
through and and she looks at myface and I can see her reaction
and she's like, oh my God, shegoes, you need to get her to a
hospital, like right now.
(17:02):
And there was.
Just I was so pale and I was solike my face was sinking in and
it was like literally likeoxygen was being sucked out of
my body, cause you know, likewhen you're like de-oxygenated
and your skin like starts tolike look like you're like
getting like old and all thisstuff, so and I could see myself
like in the reflection and Ihadn't looked in the mirror
(17:23):
cause I would literally get upout of bed, i'd go pee and then
I come back and go to sleep fordays because I wasn't eating
anything.
He would make me like hydrogen,hydrogenated waters, you know
that had like the stuff in there, like IV waters and things like
that, and then I would drinkwhat I could, but it's just was
I was getting worse and worseand worse.
I was like, okay, that's fineAnd I and the thing was, and he
(17:44):
would have sent me to thehospital sooner, but I made him
promise me not to take me backto the one because they sent me
home and they didn't do anything.
And I don't want to be stuckthere with people that don't
know what they're doing And justbeing her was Or that you feel
that just don't care, they don't, and they didn't care at all At
all.
And so I was like, okay, like Ineed to go, i do need to go to
(18:05):
the hospital.
So he called an ambulance andthen the guys get me in the car
and I'm like where'd?
they're like all right, wheredo you want to go?
And I'm like, not Cox, anywhere, but Cox Hospital, please.
You're like, no problem, mercyis literally and this was like
the biggest God thing ever,because Mercy Hospital is a
faith-based hospital and theypray over you, They, whatever
(18:31):
you need.
They're phenomenal people.
I'm like, how did I not know togo here first?
Right, the healthcare systemthere is just beyond, beyond.
And so if you live in Missouri,go to Mercy Hospital, okay 100%
.
And they take me to the hospitaland as soon as they get me
there, like I'm laying down andI hear the car, like you know,
(18:54):
they're rolling me down as fastas I can through the emergency
room And I'm watching peoplelike they're so overflowing.
There are so many people there.
I see people like sitting justlike up on the floor up against
the walls just kind of waiting,and they quickly are rubbing it
and they're like we got to getthis one in right now.
Like open up an ICU room, she'sgoing to ICU, we're going to do
all the scans and we're takingher straight to ICU.
(19:15):
So like we don't know.
And I can see the girl'ssneakers next to me and I like
she's like my guardian angel Andshe's I can see her like take
me to my room and they flip meover because on your belly is
like the best way to breathewhen you're in distress like
this.
So they put me on my belly andlike so if you're having anxiety
(19:35):
attacks, anything like that,where you feel like it's just
too much.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Is that why I?
Speaker 2 (19:40):
like my weighted blankets, yes, so you want the
pressures on your chest and it'sbecause your whole body just
flip it over and you lie on yourbelly and you just look from
one side to the next So that thewhole pressure can come onto
the chest.
So, with your head turnedsideways, you know.
So like I'm watching her shoesand she's like okay, honey,
she's like I have no idea howyou're even alive right now.
(20:03):
She goes, but we're going to,we're going to get you in here
as fast as we can.
And so they're doing like X-raywhile I'm laying down and they
got, they're pumping me full ofeven more, like I'm holding an
oxygen tank in my arm andthey're like hold this, and
they're sticking IVs in me,right, okay.
Then they pull me into the catscan room, like we're gonna do a
(20:27):
cat scan.
So they pull the oxygen machineout and I have to like lie
there with my arms over my head,you know, on my belly still,
but I'm holding the oxygenmachine so that it's out of the
scan And she's, i can feel likeher hand's holding me and she's
like you're doing so good, justbreathe.
And it's gonna be really still.
You know, i got you After that,like they put me back in the
room and then I see her toes andshe's like tapping her toes and
(20:51):
she's just kind of waiting.
And then somebody comes in andtalks to her and they're like
hey, oh, wow, you're still here,like I thought you were
supposed to leave.
She goes, i'm not leaving, shegoes.
I was obviously, but I'm notleaving until we get this one,
this one fits, situated.
She goes, this is so scary.
She goes.
I just I need to know, you knowshe's gonna make it through.
I was like it was your angel, iwas, it was amazing, it was
(21:13):
amazing.
So she eventually leaves and Iget the new one and they take me
up to my ICU room and they getme comfortable And I literally,
and the thing is, it's like Igot worse.
I got worse over the next liketwo or three days because I
couldn't even like if I was home, i knew I could get up and I
(21:34):
could go to the bathroom and I'dcome back And like by the time
I was in the hospital, Icouldn't even like eat.
Like they'd bring me food and Ineeded help to get.
Like that I have the littlebucket toilet like right by the
bed And like I couldn't evenmove from there, like literally
scoop my booty over like sixinches that way, and then off
(21:56):
onto the little tiny toiletthere, like I couldn't even do
that on my own And my phone wasin my bag and nothing inside of
me was like hey, like try to getup and go get it or ask
somebody if they can hand it toyou.
Like for three days like Ididn't have my any communication
And then my one nurse came inand she's like we're so glad
you're here and you're gonna getbetter.
(22:17):
Your whole orientation wearingher name is Hope.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
And that's somebody I know, mercy.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Hope, yeah, and just like any Hope, like I feel it
was, it's not all sunshine andbutterflies.
You know like it's hard.
Hope is hard sometimes, likeyou know that there's going to
be something difficult, sodifficult.
But if you can just look beyondand that was like the epitome
of what she was, because she'dcome in and and she said She's,
(22:45):
we're expecting you to be herefor about two months Two months,
yeah, she said, and it's gonnaget really hard, she said,
because we're the only peopleyou're gonna see.
And so start thinking like howyou wanna get better and you
wanna get home.
Just start thinking about thatAnd like, see yourself in it,
like visualizing, visualizing,visualization.
(23:06):
Like visualize, and then youknow, next time your husband can
bring you things, like he canbring you pictures that your
kids have drawn, Like theydidn't know, like my kids are
teenagers.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
Nobody's gonna draw me anything.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
But like cards and pictures of them.
And then she's like and we canput them on the wall here And it
can be like your wall, likejust this whole, like
realization of what is happeningto me right now.
And so, just like looking back,it was heartbreaking because I
didn't even know that I neededto fight.
You know, like my body was soready to be asleep that it
(23:43):
didn't know how to fight.
Yeah, so it was.
I was getting so much anxietyfrom my lungs being full.
So by the time they had donethe cats, get an action and
everything they had found thatmy lungs were over 98% flooded
And by that point they haddiagnosed me with ARDS, which is
(24:03):
acute respiratory distresssyndrome, and 60 something
percent of people that get itdie.
Like it's not, you can comeback from it, obviously, but
with them being flooded thatmuch, that was very very scary.
Very concerning.
That's why they were so like weneed to hurry up and get her,
(24:24):
Try to get all this out of herand like figure out enough for
her to fight it and everything.
So when I finally got in thehospital, that's what was like.
So it was my body's like tryingto fight And that's what was so
hard and it hurt so much.
So I would get these anxietyattacks and like I wrote about
it, about how it just feels,like it literally felt like an
(24:46):
elephant would just walk acrossmy chest and then sit on it And
like I felt like this weight Andthen I, you know, like you ever
have those dreams when you justwake up and you're like like
you're drowning.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
Oh my God, you just have to like take that breath.
Yeah, because you're drowning.
Yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
And it's that over and over again And I'm just like
, like you have that sensationand I couldn't even take a
breath like that, Like it wasliterally like in the night
start coughing, So my breathswere so incredibly shallow, like
just right here And that was it, And so I'm like I can't call,
like can you give me something?
(25:24):
so I'm not coughing becauseit's hurting me so bad.
And so they would put me on athing and it kind of like maybe
a little tired.
The anxiety was horrible andthey had me on some anxiety,
something for anxiety, which isit helped, but it didn't help me
sleep.
So it was kind of like in thislucid state, like the whole time
, just kind of like very chill,but I wanted to sleep.
(25:44):
I literally I can't think thatthings happening to my body, I
just feel like I'm, i just wantto go to sleep forever.
On the third morning I wassleeping and most of the time
when I would wake up I wouldwake up with an anxiety attack
like 100%, like freaking outright.
But on this morning I felt thishot I call it a warm hug, okay
(26:11):
On my heart.
Sure, it just wrapped itselfaround me from the inside all
the way out to the outside of mybody.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
And I felt yes, 100%.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
And I knew that, like if I could describe how it it
felt yellow and gold, Like Ifelt like it was light, like an
energy of warm gold colors.
Like I saw them when I felt themand it happened.
(26:42):
So it was like a heart hug fromthe inside out and it just
really tight on the inside of me.
And then it wrapped its armsaround me other way, on the
outside, and the whole time, forthe before that whole time,
while I was dying, the wall infront of me had a clock and it
had a crucifix And I would justsee the clock and the crucifix
and the clock and the crucifixAnd I never, like, knew what day
(27:06):
it was or what time of day itwas.
You, know I'd have to like, lookoutside to the window to see,
like through the morning,through the clock at night, like
I didn't even know, i had noidea of time And this beautiful
crucifix just staring right backat me.
And so when I opened my eyesthat morning, with this heart,
hug all.
I'm looking at is this gorgeouscrucifix that I stole and it's
(27:29):
in my room now.
I let him know I'm good And Icall the chaplain.
I'm like, while I'm packing mythings up, i'm taking the
crucifix off of this wall, i'mtaking it out with me because it
saved my life, and she's likeplease tell me the story later,
which I haven't yet, but I needto You send her this, i know,
and she's like it's okay.
It's okay, You know, we lovethat.
(27:50):
Good for you.
I'm like just put it on my bill, you know what I mean.
And she said no, no, like it'sfor you guys.
I'm like awesome, like I justwant to let you know so the next
person has theirs.
So make sure you replace theone that I'm taking, because
somebody else needs to havetheirs here, right, yeah, so
it's this beautiful vision ofhope, of like time that doesn't
even exist, because it doesn't,and then salvation and hope and
(28:16):
new life and the whole thing.
So it was just incredible.
So after that point I turned ahuge corner and I started
getting better right And I cansit up in my bed and have an
appetite.
I can actually get myself tothe toilet right there.
And it was so strange becauseI'd sit there and like they
(28:37):
would forget to close thecurtain, so like there's a
window to my door and I'msitting on the toilet and I feel
like the little kitty cat likeeating litter box, like don't
look at me, don't look at melike that.
Well, they're walking by andI'm just.
It was so embarrassing And mygoal at that point was I'm going
(28:59):
to go to the toilet by myselfthere, that toilet.
But for now I had these, i hadthis oxygen tubes in my nose and
it was like an accordion thatran from my nose all the way up
around my ear where I held it,and then the band just kind of
was like and it wasn't, it washumidity and oxygen together.
(29:20):
So they did humidity and oxygenso that, because you can't do
pure oxygen when you're, keep itwet, yeah, yeah.
So when the respiratorytherapist would come in and look
at it, or the respiratorytechnician, he'd pull the paper
out and look at all my numbersand like my breathing habits,
right, and he says, okay, he'slike, well, you turned the
corner, you're doing really good.
He's like just, he's like we'regonna maybe in a few days we'll
(29:44):
be able to like move you topure oxygen, but we need to give
it some more time.
So in my head I'm thinking, oh,my gosh, i need to be able to
breathe better so that they cangive me oxygen, so that I can
live and then get to thebathroom.
And I'm like I just want to getto the bathroom, like baby
steps.
My goal is to go to the bathroom.
(30:04):
Sure, turn the goals.
Yes, little bit of it, thankyou.
He leaves, and then they allleave, and it dawns on me
pranayama breathing.
This is the breathing that weteach in our bighram sequences.
And as I'm going, through thedialogue in my head, because you
are also a yoga instructor.
Yes, so knowing the dialogue andteaching it, it literally what
(30:24):
happens is?
is it literally, when you do itproperly all the way through,
it filters out all the gunk inthe bottom of the lungs and it
pushes it out?
Yeah, so if I can breathe likeI teach people to breathe I can
get out of here.
I go to the bathroom like I'mlike I can't do this, i'm so
(30:45):
angry So I sit up in my bed andit literally like I sit up and I
let my legs just hang off theside and just so I can get my
spine straight, and so youinterlace your fingers and put
them underneath your chin andthen you take a deep inhale in
and you Cold out.
Let's do it All right Straightspine, straight spine And
interlace all your fingers.
And then touch your knuckles toyour chin and then look forward
(31:07):
So you can see yourself in thecamera.
So move forward, right.
And then sacrobellion.
So it's nice and tight, likeyou're at the beach, yes, and
you're pulling in it, and thenkind of like, because we're
sitting, it's okay, but kind oflike, squeeze your booty so that
your tailbone is doing this andyou're like, okay, so squeeze,
suck it in and then lookstraight at yourself in the
mirror.
Now when you inhale, you'regoing to close the back of your
(31:29):
throat like a snore and you'reinhaling through your nose, so
close your mouth through.
Your mouth is soft, and thenwe're going to inhale for six
seconds.
So inhale, hold it Now exhale.
So when you're inhaling andexhaling, your belly is pulling
(31:55):
in.
So with the compression of thebelly in, it pushes on the lungs
.
So the lungs are pushing outmore than they need to And like
the full motion would beinhaling with your elbows all
the way up, up, up, up just alittle while here, and then hold
it, exhale, head goes back Andthen pull your elbows to the
(32:17):
front of you and then keeplooking back And that's your
inhale, exhale.
So how many times you do that?
So, on a regular basis.
You're supposed to be doing itlike in a class we do five and
then we do 10.
And they're supposed to be atleast six seconds of an inhale
and at the most, six seconds, atleast six seconds of an exhale.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
This just came to me.
Yes, tell me, i'm reading this.
The last podcast that I did waswith Carla in April, and then
April texted her and I something, and it has to do exactly with
what you just said.
Okay, she sends this.
God answered in the name hegave.
Is recorded in the originalHebrew is Y-H-W-H.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Yahweh.
Speaker 1 (33:05):
But that's the way it's recorded.
Over the centuries humans havearbitrarily added an A and an E
in there to get Yahweh,presumably because we have a
preference for vowels.
There was a moment in time whenMoses had the courage to ask
God what his name is.
Perhaps this is why Yahweh wasconsidered an unspeakable name,
(33:28):
because quite literally, it isnot supposed to be spoken but
breathed.
But scholars and rabbis havenoted that the letters Y-H-W-H
represent breathing sounds oraspirated consonants.
When pronounced withoutintervening vowels, it actually
(33:49):
sounds like breathingY-H-N-H-W-H-X-Hell.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Yahweh.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
Y-H-W-H, our God has given us his name as our very
breath of life, A constantreminder for us that it is only
because of him that we live.
He is our life sustaining power, And when you said that, I was
just like that's what that is.
You were breathing, You had thespiritual knowing and you had
(34:22):
this practice and you were beinghealed by that.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
So in the Sanskrit the word pranayama literally
translates to breath of life,And we know that.
They know how sacred that isAnd that is creator.
That's creator connection.
It blew my mind that and then,knowing that and visualizing
(34:50):
like literally the breath oflife in me while I'm trying to
come back, so like my inhaleswere, i could maybe get two
seconds in worth And then I'dstart to exhale and I'd be
coughing up a storm.
So it started off super smallbut I was able to like push and
push and I knew like it's okay.
Also, you know a little bit TMI, the whole coughing and peeing
(35:14):
all over myself.
Yeah, i literally like had thembring me extra towels and I
would like wrap my body intowels because I'd be sitting
there and I cough and I'd likeprobably pee on myself, you know
.
And so during the breathing,like I'm like wrapped up in
towels, like a big baby diaper,and I'm like breathing and like
allowing myself to cough up thisjunk, and then more inhales,
(35:37):
more exhales and pushing, andthe more I knew it, if I can
push harder, cough more, it'sokay, i can get out of here
faster.
I knew it.
And, sure enough, he came backto see me two days later.
He came back to see me a dayafter that, the day after I
started, and he goes back to thepaperwork and he pulls it out
and he looks at me and he says,oh my gosh.
(35:58):
He goes, you are doing so good.
He said I'm gonna.
I think I'm gonna put, i canput you on oxygen.
Now He says you want to trysome oxygen?
I was like, yes, i do.
I was like.
I want it because I need to goto the bathroom by myself.
I need to just dive laughingbecause it's such an ordeal to
like even get up.
(36:18):
Number one, you know.
and then number two it would belike having to like disconnect
and reconnect my own oxygen inorder to like take myself to the
bathroom, to connect to like alittle take, you know.
So, like the first couple oftimes like I had they had to
help me do it anyways, you know,And once I learned how they did
it, I did it on my own and Ididn't tell anybody.
I was like, yeah, I'm with thebathroom myself.
It was fantastic just knowinghow to be able to do that and
(36:42):
get myself out of there.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
I love that.
That's amazing, yeah.
So how long were you in the?
Speaker 2 (36:47):
hospital.
So, yeah, they were after Istarted that, and then, my
miracle, the whole thing.
I was only in there for ninedays.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
Wow, that's it, yeah.
And they.
They thought it was going to betwo months.
They thought it was going to betwo months, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
I had a crazy appetite, which is fantastic
because I hadn't eaten in liketwo and a half weeks, yeah, and
I was like staying up later justbecause I was like I was head
set for so long.
So I'm like, okay, stayinglater.
And Josh brought me an iPad andso I could watch movies.
So I finally got to my bag likefour days later, like I'm in my
(37:20):
bag and I get to call him andface time him for the first time
and, oh, it was just thesweetest thing.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
You know, get to see my baby and yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, so it was just amazing, i'm so sorry you went
through all that.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I'm just glad that you're okay.
In my life, in your life, in somany people's lives that we
know in our family, it justfeels like it's been such a huge
attack on everyone and insteadof saying, well, why didn't you
do this or why didn't you dothat?
You know, I've been there andI'm just trying to survive or
(37:58):
keep my kid alive, you know, andit has nothing to do with
anybody else You but that so.
I get that.
It's just so thankful you'reokay.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
It's my story and I wanna tell it.
I want people to know like,dude, i love you and you didn't
hear from me because this, thisand this you know what I mean.
Like I was dead, like you know,like I'm not, i don't ghost
people, you know.
No, you don't, You know I justliterally was becoming a ghost,
like that's it.
You know, Oh my gosh Somethingstupid like that.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Yeah, but so from there, how has it changed?
Speaker 2 (38:33):
your life.
So I really feel like on aspiritual level, that I'm in
this whole new version of myself, 100% Like I didn't pass to the
other side and like have likethe near death but I got pretty
darn close And then coming backthe way that I did, i feel like
this whole new like purposethere's purpose.
(38:55):
There is And there was purposebefore you know.
I always felt like I was meantfor something you know And we
all should feel that way.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yeah, that's why we're here.
I just have.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
I had like amazing parents that instilled that in
me like all the time.
So I knew, you know when I hadthat confidence.
But after this it's just, it'sso much more.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
It's lighter, it's freer.
Yeah, you feel it more it flows, probably through you, more.
There's not a lot of stopsthere.
And then when you realize, whenyou come to you know a trauma,
near death experience like that,or losing someone, that you
gotta live every day like it'syour last, because you just
(39:36):
don't know, and even if you do,end up average living to what 85
, 90,?
you know you don't have a lot oftime left.
So why are we holding back thegifts that we could be sharing
with other people, Like a wordof healing?
you know You could saysomething to someone and the
Holy Spirit's totally using youand flowing it through your
(39:58):
mouth And it feels so easy andit's a gift for them and it
could change them for the restof their life.
You know, Absolutely Yeah, Andit's not our job or who.
It's the Holy Spirit's job totouch that person.
It's just are we blockingourselves from the Holy Spirit
and from communication to beable to share, Because we're not
(40:19):
close enough, we don't have aclose enough relationship, we
don't know what his voice soundslike, we don't know what our
communication is And then, whenwe do get bits of information or
intuition or gut feels, wequestion it, We question it, we
deny it, we blow it off.
But I wanna encourage anyone outthere that if you have that,
(40:39):
you hear it, you feel it, justgo with it once and see what
happens, Because it'll blow yoursocks off really.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
We should all be living in this idea that we're
so much more than this physicalbody and being able to speak
beyond that for other peoplethat feels stuck and don't know
that there's more to life thanjust what you can feel and see
And I feel like that'sliberating, so that by itself
(41:08):
and being able to share withpeople.
Look who I have today such a Ferris, the sweetest
sister-in-law.
She's amazing.
I'm so excited that she's herewith me today.
Again, it was just kind of arandom thing It seems to be
random things And I've known hersince I think you were 16 years
old.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Last time Was it 17?
, 16 or 17.
I think I was 17.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Yeah, I can tell you that it's just really amazing.
It's the first time I met her.
When she came over It was justinstant, like instant click with
you.
And when you left my housebecause you were dating my
brother-in-law and Adam and Iwere already married, living in
a house and you came over Andafter you left I looked at him
(00:47):
and he goes, she's so cool, AndI think I said, I think I just
met my sister, Yeah, Yeah, Andshe's 17, 16, 17, whatever I
knew then And I was likespiritually she is like a
40-year-old, Like spirituallyshe's so grown up and she's so
in tune.
So I want you to tell everyonea little bit about yourself and
(01:11):
the history and how you grew up.
Just real quick.
Your parents were missionaries.
You traveled around, Yeah, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
And maybe your mom and dad became missionaries when
I think it was like two Andtheir first ministry just like
newly saved, like the wholething their first ministry was
being sent to some mountains inMexico to be orphan parents of
this beautiful little family oflike 20-something orphans.
(01:41):
And there was another couplethat was there and then a couple
that was sent with them, and itwas just really awesome growing
up in something like that, yeah, and I feel like it's always
been in my heart to adoptbecause of that And we just yeah
, just hasn't not the right timeyet, you know like, but we've
been talking about it for years,so it's like, maybe one of
these days.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
And you have four boys.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Yes, i do, and you're married, and how long have you
been married?
We just celebrated 20 years.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
You did, yeah, congratulations.
It's hard to keep up witheverybody.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
I know It's just.
it's been a crazy cool ride forsure.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
So I initially contacted you because of Lion's
Mane mushrooms that you can getover the counter And I had never
heard of this And Sunshinelives in Missouri now and she
was down visiting And I hadheard about Lion's Mane and
she's always like what would youcall yourself in the apothecary
world?
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I'm like forever studying.
I'll never arrive, but I'mstudying herbalism and natural
path remedies, herbs, like allthose things you can think of.
So I call myself an apothecarybecause, you know, God brings
people into my life and I'm like, hey, have you tried this.
You know like andcertifications take a really,
(02:57):
really long time.
So I'm looking to be anapprentice right now with a lady
, but I'm just it's.
you know it all happens inGod's time.
Oh, it does, and this has beenyour journey as long as.
I've known you.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
Like you've always been your healer and you seek
from the earth to heal your bodywith different things.
So I knew I was talking to theright person.
you know about the mushroomsbecause I heard that it helps
with Alzheimer's prevention Andmy dad passed of Alzheimer's
very quickly at the end.
but looking back, you know hehad gotten it so young And you
(03:34):
know it makes me worry and thinkabout that as well.
So someone had told me about it.
So then I went to Guru here andshe's like yes, and it helps
with this.
And oh, did you know that it'san antidepressant?
And I was like no, but I waswondering why I was so dang
happy when I was cleaning thehouse, because I was, and I was
(03:55):
just laughing, and so it's beenprobably a month And what I've
learned is it really matters howyou get it, where you get it,
it's not psychedelic.
I got mine at the little localcompound pharmacy down the
street.
And the benefits that I'venoticed just in a few weeks,
(04:15):
with the clarity, the brain fog,and so I reached out to
Sunshine going tell me more.
So we hooked up online whileshe was in Missouri And I had no
idea the conversation that cameout of that And, lo and behold,
she was already coming here thefollowing Friday.
So I was like, please, we justcome tell the story, because it
(04:40):
is so moving and so touching.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I'm getting chills all over my body.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
So I'm going to stop talking now and I'm going to let
you talk.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Okay, all right, so I knew a lot about the mushrooms
and things and herbs and stufflike that before all this, but
now there's something to applyit to.
So it's crazy how that allworked.
So I already have the knowledgeand then knowing how to heal
myself later, yeah, So it's sucha benefit that you already knew
(05:13):
this.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
So when this particular event happened, you
knew what to do.
right, Absolutely Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
And I feel like some things that I knew, like even
like I'll talk about the yogatoo even the things that I knew
helped me get me out of there.
So it was 22.
Yeah, yeah, because mom passedNovember of 21 and then it was
just a few months later And Ibecame really ill with pneumonia
(05:41):
and I get pneumonia like everytwo years, it's a thing.
So coming to find out there waslike I have parasites in my
lungs, so that's why.
So I learned that later, but itwent undiagnosed, because I
went in for help and this islike a whole new healthcare
system to me, right?
So I don't have my people tolike.
I'll be like hey, you know, drRamirez, like it's pneumonia
(06:02):
again in Wimberley.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
It's new people.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
So I'm like I'm pretty sure it's this.
You're like well, we're testingall this because it looks like
a UTI, so they're taking all theother tests right.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
So I go-.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Was this a holistic doctor or was it just No, no, no
, it was a surgeon care, likeyou know it goes undiagnosed and
I go home and they send me homewith like a high prescribed
Tylenol for my head, right,because my head was hurting
pretty bad.
Then, on top of that, it wentundiagnosed and then I was
somehow exposed to COVID-19,because then all of a sudden I
(06:35):
can't breathe.
Walking up the stairs And I wastelling you the story about
like the in-laws were over andeverybody's hanging out and I
stayed home because I was so Icouldn't go anywhere.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
I'm so tired So you've gone to the emergency
room.
they just kind of gave you Theysent me home.
Did they give you like anantibiotic or anything, or
pretty much like here's apainkiller, you'll get over it.
No antibiotic, nope.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Okay, and then they do-.
they just sent me home and itwas about three days later and
that's when it starts hitting meeven harder, and I had dry with
me that day and I'm just liketrying to keep this little baby
happy, you know, and he's sochill, so he's like And at this
point.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
he was what two He yeah, he was He was little bitty
, he was Okay, yeah, he had justturned three.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Yeah, he's running around, but with his autism he
doesn't he's non-verbal, so helike points at things, you know.
So it's like okay, he wantslike toast or bread.
So, like I did my could I givehim the bread and I just laid on
the couch and I was in and outlike it was.
so shocking to me is like howtired I was and I'd like go to
sleep and I'd wake up and I'mlike, oh my gosh, like I've been
asleep, oh, my gosh, it's scary, and it's that mom sleep, you
(07:42):
know, like you can hear what'shappening, you know and like
That's a good analogy.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
The mom sleep.
Yeah, the mom sleep.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
The hum is on and on the TV and then you can hear
like what's happening around you.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
So he wanted something downstairs.
So I go downstairs And inMissouri it's split level, so,
like, all your upstairs is yourmain housing, oh, ok, so that's
where we were The living room,the kitchen's up there,
everything And then downstairsis all the bedrooms, like the
boys' bedrooms, right?
So I go down to get himwhatever he needed And on my way
back up I stop and I can't makeit up the stairs anymore And
(08:17):
I'm out of breath, likeeverything I'm just done And my
body is hurting so bad.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
And no oxygen.
probably I have nothing.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yes, there was no oxygen And I didn't know.
Like I was just tired, musteredup, go to the couch, get to the
phone.
I called Josh and he's likewe're on our way right now, like
everything's done, so they getthere.
And later that night I was justso done.
I'm like please take me to thehospital.
I don't know what's wrong withme.
I'm just definitely not anybetter.
You know, i feel so much worse.
(08:46):
So he takes me to the emergencyroom of this one hospital And I
wait almost eight hours in thewaiting room And I'm like I sit
by the bathroom because everytime I cough I pee myself.
Yeah, but the cough is soviolent Like it's literally like
even if I didn't have like Ipee on myself.
So I would like cough and go tothe bathroom and then come back
(09:06):
.
And I sat there and the nursecame over and she swabbed me.
She came back.
They knew I was positive forpneumonia and COVID-19.
And they made me wait and waitand wait And they kept letting
other people come in.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Did they quarantine you?
No, they left her there.
Perfect, they left, i know Theyjust left me there.
And people were all like theydidn't have it.
I'm so tired.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Like I have to go to sleep.
I told her I'm like I can't.
We went in at 11 o'clock atnight.
I'm like I'm so tired Like Ineed to lay down.
And they're like, well, we'redoing the best we can.
There's no pods available Andthey had just let like the sweet
80-year-old couple through Andthey're just like, yeah, we
think we're positive And they'reperfectly like way more OK than
(09:52):
I was.
You know what I'm saying?
That's so sad, i'm dying overhere literally.
And you're like they took twopods And then I'm leaving And I
go.
And I actually watched themleave before I go.
They took care of them andeverything.
And I tell the nurse I'm like Ineed to go lay down.
So I put two chairs together.
I'm like, please come get mewhen it's my turn.
Seriously, i'm not OK And Ihave high pain tolerance.
(10:17):
I'm really nice.
You know what I mean.
So it's one of these like Idon't look like I need to be
helped immediately.
So, that really was to mydetriment.
So I go sleep, sleep it off fora little bit, and then they
come and get me And they put mein the pod And by this point the
brain fog has taken over AndI'm like I'm woozy, i can't even
(10:37):
sit up without anything.
They hook me up to a littleoxygen lying in the bed, my
head's pounding because theheadache hasn't gone away from
the first time I went in.
The doctor finally comes in andhe's standing way back in the
corner like far, far away fromme, and his hands are crossed
and he's leaning up against thewall And of course we're all
(10:59):
masked up.
I can't see his mouth movingand I can't hear what he's
saying.
He's like mumbling And becauseof the brain fog I'm trying to
rub my eye so I can hear itbetter.
I'm like remember you telling methat I can't even like what's
happening here, So I'm likeopening my eyes, Like that's
somehow.
It makes me so frustrated,somehow like try to hear what he
(11:19):
has to say.
And I'm like squinting my eyesand looking at him And all I
could think was number one wherethe hell is Josh?
Why won't they let my husbandbe here with me?
Because I need him here to helpme understand what's happening.
And I'm like I'm 41.
I'm in great health, like yeah,with mom's death, like I got a
(11:39):
little depressed and might haveprobably gained a little bit of
weight at that point.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
But I was being any, maybe have dropped with the
stress a little bit, but there'sno way.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
Like I'm any of the things where this should be a
problem for me.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
So all I can hear him say was well, there's this
thing we can try on you, butthere hasn't been a lot of
research on it, so I'm not sureit's something you even want to
do.
Like he's trying to talk me outof something He's like, or I
can send you home with someantibiotics, and then I think he
never even said, and then wecan admit to you, or anything
like that.
All he said was give you someof this new stuff And then I
(12:16):
don't know if you want to try itor not, kind of kind of whole
thing right.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
So I was like not a lot of really clear direction.
There's nothing Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
And so I'm like this isn't my brain fog, like I'm
hearing him say these words,right, and then he says, or I
can give you some antibioticsand oxygen machine, and then you
can, we'll just send you home.
And I was like I just want togo home, like I'm just thinking
in my head like I can't be hereanymore, not with these people.
Like I just I don't feel right.
You know how you know someplaces, like it's just some guy
(12:44):
came in and gave me a littleroller oxygen machine.
They handed me some paperwork.
I'm like, oh, here, you're goodto go.
And I'm like, coming in there,like I couldn't even like stand
up without wanting to sit backdown, because it was so heavy in
my chest And I couldn't, icouldn't breathe long enough, so
I put, they put the oxygenmachine on me And I literally
(13:05):
had to walk myself from that pod, which was just like a room
kind of thing, all the waythrough and back and outside.
And outside it was likenegative two, like no, and I had
to wait, like I had to wait forJosh.
I'd call him at some point andbe like, okay, i'm ready to go.
And he had to get taken to theboys' school already.
He had Jariah, so he had tomake his way all the way back to
(13:27):
me And it's a good 25-minutedrive at least from our house.
They prescribed an oxygenmachine, so the hospital brought
one, or the text, came over andset it up and showed Josh how
to use it.
And then there's this longpiece of paper and it kind of
tells you not even full blast,we left it on, whatever it told
(13:50):
us to leave it on, and then Iliterally just started dying
over the next week and a halfBecause I wasn't taking anything
to help it.
Josh was pumping me full ofsupplements and he was on the
phone with anybody he couldpossibly think of that knew
enough to help him.
So we have a friend here inWembley.
(14:11):
Her mom is a doctor in FloridaAnd she had been bringing
patients back from the deadnonstop, so she had a great
success rate And he had beencalling Leslie, my best friend,
and trying to figure out Andthat's how he was hooking up.
And then I have my friend CammyRemember Cammy?
And she's an atropath herselfAnd she's been through crazy
(14:31):
stuff of her own health-wise.
So it was so bad that I neededintervention And I needed a hell
of a lot more oxygen than thatmachine was ever going to give
me.
You know, it was just so bad.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
So Josh was giving you a medicine Like, because
Like an over-accounter.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Yeah, over-the-counter.
So like the horse medicine,dewormer or whatever.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Oh, i heard about that, did Joe.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Grogan, take that or something like that And like and
that's just-, does it help?
Did it help If you take itearly on enough?
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Wow, ok, did you take that?
Speaker 2 (15:07):
I did Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
And it helped.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
It was helping me not die OK, because it was so bad
Like I needed I would haveneeded.
So whatever is in there, itwould have needed to have been
way more potent for it to kill.
Was it strong enough, yeah,whatever.
And it wouldn't have matteredlike how much I would have taken
.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
It's just the fact that that's only meant for a
certain stage of whatever ishappening in your body, maybe
right before, early on, but atthis point, girl, you are going
to save you.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
So what happens is is like when you're taking things
like that and then like thefembendental I think it's how
you say it and that's for likegoats, right, right.
The whole idea behind that isthat it stops the reproduction
of your, of the cell growth ofthat thing in your body.
And that's it.
So, when they like, use it fora dewormer And like if you go
back to the history of all thesethings being made, they're for
(16:00):
people, they just give them toanimals.
OK, OK And then the pharmacywants to make money, so they
separate the human version ofthose things, so that they'll
make money.
Interesting, oh my God.
And you can watch Joe Rogan andhe'll tell you all about the
pharmacy and how it's the devil.
because of how much money.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah, yeah.
And in Latin the word from afrom a company We've talked
about that Looked at thatscripture Yep So it's, it's just
one of those things whereyou're just like, oh, like, come
on people.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
So it makes it so hard when you want to like do it
for yourself Like I, want tolike kill my own family and
stuff, but so I So you're dying.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
This isn't working.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Every day, every day just getting close to the death
and literally like he gets onthe tele-doc.
He gets a tele-doc on with me,finally, gets somebody to come
through and and she looks at myface and I can see her reaction
and she's like, oh my God, shegoes, you need to get her to a
hospital, like right now.
(17:02):
And there was.
Just I was so pale and I was solike my face was sinking in and
it was like literally likeoxygen was being sucked out of
my body, cause you know, likewhen you're like de-oxygenated
and your skin like starts tolike look like you're like
getting like old and all thisstuff, so and I could see myself
like in the reflection and Ihadn't looked in the mirror
(17:23):
cause I would literally get upout of bed, i'd go pee and then
I come back and go to sleep fordays because I wasn't eating
anything.
He would make me like hydrogen,hydrogenated waters, you know
that had like the stuff in there, like IV waters and things like
that, and then I would drinkwhat I could, but it's just was
I was getting worse and worseand worse.
I was like, okay, that's fineAnd I and the thing was, and he
(17:44):
would have sent me to thehospital sooner, but I made him
promise me not to take me backto the one because they sent me
home and they didn't do anything.
And I don't want to be stuckthere with people that don't
know what they're doing And justbeing her was Or that you feel
that just don't care, they don't, and they didn't care at all At
all.
And so I was like, okay, like Ineed to go, i do need to go to
(18:05):
the hospital.
So he called an ambulance andthen the guys get me in the car
and I'm like where'd?
they're like all right, wheredo you want to go?
And I'm like, not Cox, anywhere, but Cox Hospital, please.
You're like, no problem, mercyis literally and this was like
the biggest God thing ever,because Mercy Hospital is a
faith-based hospital and theypray over you, They, whatever
(18:31):
you need.
They're phenomenal people.
I'm like, how did I not know togo here first?
Right, the healthcare systemthere is just beyond, beyond.
And so if you live in Missouri,go to Mercy Hospital, okay 100%
.
And they take me to the hospitaland as soon as they get me
there, like I'm laying down andI hear the car, like you know,
(18:54):
they're rolling me down as fastas I can through the emergency
room And I'm watching peoplelike they're so overflowing.
There are so many people there.
I see people like sitting justlike up on the floor up against
the walls just kind of waiting,and they quickly are rubbing it
and they're like we got to getthis one in right now.
Like open up an ICU room, she'sgoing to ICU, we're going to do
all the scans and we're takingher straight to ICU.
(19:15):
So like we don't know.
And I can see the girl'ssneakers next to me and I like
she's like my guardian angel Andshe's I can see her like take
me to my room and they flip meover because on your belly is
like the best way to breathewhen you're in distress like
this.
So they put me on my belly andlike so if you're having anxiety
(19:35):
attacks, anything like that,where you feel like it's just
too much.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
Is that why I?
Speaker 2 (19:40):
like my weighted blankets, yes, so you want the
pressures on your chest and it'sbecause your whole body just
flip it over and you lie on yourbelly and you just look from
one side to the next So that thewhole pressure can come onto
the chest.
So, with your head turnedsideways, you know.
So like I'm watching her shoesand she's like okay, honey,
she's like I have no idea howyou're even alive right now.
(20:03):
She goes, but we're going to,we're going to get you in here
as fast as we can.
And so they're doing like X-raywhile I'm laying down and they
got, they're pumping me full ofeven more, like I'm holding an
oxygen tank in my arm andthey're like hold this, and
they're sticking IVs in me,right, okay.
Then they pull me into the catscan room, like we're gonna do a
(20:27):
cat scan.
So they pull the oxygen machineout and I have to like lie
there with my arms over my head,you know, on my belly still,
but I'm holding the oxygenmachine so that it's out of the
scan And she's, i can feel likeher hand's holding me and she's
like you're doing so good, justbreathe.
And it's gonna be really still.
You know, i got you After that,like they put me back in the
room and then I see her toes andshe's like tapping her toes and
(20:51):
she's just kind of waiting.
And then somebody comes in andtalks to her and they're like
hey, oh, wow, you're still here,like I thought you were
supposed to leave.
She goes, i'm not leaving, shegoes.
I was obviously, but I'm notleaving until we get this one,
this one fits, situated.
She goes, this is so scary.
She goes.
I just I need to know, you knowshe's gonna make it through.
I was like it was your angel, iwas, it was amazing, it was
(21:13):
amazing.
So she eventually leaves and Iget the new one and they take me
up to my ICU room and they getme comfortable And I literally,
and the thing is, it's like Igot worse.
I got worse over the next liketwo or three days because I
couldn't even like if I was home, i knew I could get up and I
(21:34):
could go to the bathroom and I'dcome back And like by the time
I was in the hospital, Icouldn't even like eat.
Like they'd bring me food and Ineeded help to get.
Like that I have the littlebucket toilet like right by the
bed And like I couldn't evenmove from there, like literally
scoop my booty over like sixinches that way, and then off
(21:56):
onto the little tiny toiletthere, like I couldn't even do
that on my own And my phone wasin my bag and nothing inside of
me was like hey, like try to getup and go get it or ask
somebody if they can hand it toyou.
Like for three days like Ididn't have my any communication
And then my one nurse came inand she's like we're so glad
you're here and you're gonna getbetter.
(22:17):
Your whole orientation wearingher name is Hope.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
And that's somebody I know, mercy.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Hope, yeah, and just like any Hope, like I feel it
was, it's not all sunshine andbutterflies.
You know like it's hard.
Hope is hard sometimes, likeyou know that there's going to
be something difficult, sodifficult.
But if you can just look beyondand that was like the epitome
of what she was, because she'dcome in and and she said She's,
(22:45):
we're expecting you to be herefor about two months Two months,
yeah, she said, and it's gonnaget really hard, she said,
because we're the only peopleyou're gonna see.
And so start thinking like howyou wanna get better and you
wanna get home.
Just start thinking about thatAnd like, see yourself in it,
like visualizing, visualizing,visualization.
(23:06):
Like visualize, and then youknow, next time your husband can
bring you things, like he canbring you pictures that your
kids have drawn, Like theydidn't know, like my kids are
teenagers.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
Nobody's gonna draw me anything.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
But like cards and pictures of them.
And then she's like and we canput them on the wall here And it
can be like your wall, likejust this whole, like
realization of what is happeningto me right now.
And so, just like looking back,it was heartbreaking because I
didn't even know that I neededto fight.
You know, like my body was soready to be asleep that it
(23:43):
didn't know how to fight.
Yeah, so it was.
I was getting so much anxietyfrom my lungs being full.
So by the time they had donethe cats, get an action and
everything they had found thatmy lungs were over 98% flooded
And by that point they haddiagnosed me with ARDS, which is
(24:03):
acute respiratory distresssyndrome, and 60 something
percent of people that get itdie.
Like it's not, you can comeback from it, obviously, but
with them being flooded thatmuch, that was very very scary.
Very concerning.
That's why they were so like weneed to hurry up and get her,
(24:24):
Try to get all this out of herand like figure out enough for
her to fight it and everything.
So when I finally got in thehospital, that's what was like.
So it was my body's like tryingto fight And that's what was so
hard and it hurt so much.
So I would get these anxietyattacks and like I wrote about
it, about how it just feels,like it literally felt like an
(24:46):
elephant would just walk acrossmy chest and then sit on it And
like I felt like this weight Andthen I, you know, like you ever
have those dreams when you justwake up and you're like like
you're drowning.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
Oh my God, you just have to like take that breath.
Yeah, because you're drowning.
Yes, yes.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
And it's that over and over again And I'm just like
, like you have that sensationand I couldn't even take a
breath like that, Like it wasliterally like in the night
start coughing, So my breathswere so incredibly shallow, like
just right here And that was it, And so I'm like I can't call,
like can you give me something?
(25:24):
so I'm not coughing becauseit's hurting me so bad.
And so they would put me on athing and it kind of like maybe
a little tired.
The anxiety was horrible andthey had me on some anxiety,
something for anxiety, which isit helped, but it didn't help me
sleep.
So it was kind of like in thislucid state, like the whole time
, just kind of like very chill,but I wanted to sleep.
(25:44):
I literally I can't think thatthings happening to my body, I
just feel like I'm, i just wantto go to sleep forever.
On the third morning I wassleeping and most of the time
when I would wake up I wouldwake up with an anxiety attack
like 100%, like freaking outright.
But on this morning I felt thishot I call it a warm hug, okay
(26:11):
On my heart.
Sure, it just wrapped itselfaround me from the inside all
the way out to the outside of mybody.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
And I felt yes, 100%.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
And I knew that, like if I could describe how it it
felt yellow and gold, Like Ifelt like it was light, like an
energy of warm gold colors.
Like I saw them when I felt themand it happened.
(26:42):
So it was like a heart hug fromthe inside out and it just
really tight on the inside of me.
And then it wrapped its armsaround me other way, on the
outside, and the whole time, forthe before that whole time,
while I was dying, the wall infront of me had a clock and it
had a crucifix And I would justsee the clock and the crucifix
and the clock and the crucifixAnd I never, like, knew what day
(27:06):
it was or what time of day itwas.
You, know I'd have to like, lookoutside to the window to see,
like through the morning,through the clock at night, like
I didn't even know, i had noidea of time And this beautiful
crucifix just staring right backat me.
And so when I opened my eyesthat morning, with this heart,
hug all.
I'm looking at is this gorgeouscrucifix that I stole and it's
(27:29):
in my room now.
I let him know I'm good And Icall the chaplain.
I'm like, while I'm packing mythings up, i'm taking the
crucifix off of this wall, i'mtaking it out with me because it
saved my life, and she's likeplease tell me the story later,
which I haven't yet, but I needto You send her this, i know,
and she's like it's okay.
It's okay, You know, we lovethat.
(27:50):
Good for you.
I'm like just put it on my bill, you know what I mean.
And she said no, no, like it'sfor you guys.
I'm like awesome, like I justwant to let you know so the next
person has theirs.
So make sure you replace theone that I'm taking, because
somebody else needs to havetheirs here, right, yeah, so
it's this beautiful vision ofhope, of like time that doesn't
even exist, because it doesn't,and then salvation and hope and
(28:16):
new life and the whole thing.
So it was just incredible.
So after that point I turned ahuge corner and I started
getting better right And I cansit up in my bed and have an
appetite.
I can actually get myself tothe toilet right there.
And it was so strange becauseI'd sit there and like they
(28:37):
would forget to close thecurtain, so like there's a
window to my door and I'msitting on the toilet and I feel
like the little kitty cat likeeating litter box, like don't
look at me, don't look at melike that.
Well, they're walking by andI'm just.
It was so embarrassing And mygoal at that point was I'm going
(28:59):
to go to the toilet by myselfthere, that toilet.
But for now I had these, i hadthis oxygen tubes in my nose and
it was like an accordion thatran from my nose all the way up
around my ear where I held it,and then the band just kind of
was like and it wasn't, it washumidity and oxygen together.
(29:20):
So they did humidity and oxygenso that, because you can't do
pure oxygen when you're, keep itwet, yeah, yeah.
So when the respiratorytherapist would come in and look
at it, or the respiratorytechnician, he'd pull the paper
out and look at all my numbersand like my breathing habits,
right, and he says, okay, he'slike, well, you turned the
corner, you're doing really good.
He's like just, he's like we'regonna maybe in a few days we'll
(29:44):
be able to like move you topure oxygen, but we need to give
it some more time.
So in my head I'm thinking, oh,my gosh, i need to be able to
breathe better so that they cangive me oxygen, so that I can
live and then get to thebathroom.
And I'm like I just want to getto the bathroom, like baby
steps.
My goal is to go to the bathroom.
(30:04):
Sure, turn the goals.
Yes, little bit of it, thankyou.
He leaves, and then they allleave, and it dawns on me
pranayama breathing.
This is the breathing that weteach in our bighram sequences.
And as I'm going, through thedialogue in my head, because you
are also a yoga instructor.
Yes, so knowing the dialogue andteaching it, it literally what
(30:24):
happens is?
is it literally, when you do itproperly all the way through,
it filters out all the gunk inthe bottom of the lungs and it
pushes it out?
Yeah, so if I can breathe likeI teach people to breathe I can
get out of here.
I go to the bathroom like I'mlike I can't do this, i'm so
(30:45):
angry So I sit up in my bed andit literally like I sit up and I
let my legs just hang off theside and just so I can get my
spine straight, and so youinterlace your fingers and put
them underneath your chin andthen you take a deep inhale in
and you Cold out.
Let's do it All right Straightspine, straight spine And
interlace all your fingers.
And then touch your knuckles toyour chin and then look forward
(31:07):
So you can see yourself in thecamera.
So move forward, right.
And then sacrobellion.
So it's nice and tight, likeyou're at the beach, yes, and
you're pulling in it, and thenkind of like, because we're
sitting, it's okay, but kind oflike, squeeze your booty so that
your tailbone is doing this andyou're like, okay, so squeeze,
suck it in and then lookstraight at yourself in the
mirror.
Now when you inhale, you'regoing to close the back of your
(31:29):
throat like a snore and you'reinhaling through your nose, so
close your mouth through.
Your mouth is soft, and thenwe're going to inhale for six
seconds.
So inhale, hold it Now exhale.
So when you're inhaling andexhaling, your belly is pulling
(31:55):
in.
So with the compression of thebelly in, it pushes on the lungs
.
So the lungs are pushing outmore than they need to And like
the full motion would beinhaling with your elbows all
the way up, up, up, up just alittle while here, and then hold
it, exhale, head goes back Andthen pull your elbows to the
(32:17):
front of you and then keeplooking back And that's your
inhale, exhale.
So how many times you do that?
So, on a regular basis.
You're supposed to be doing itlike in a class we do five and
then we do 10.
And they're supposed to be atleast six seconds of an inhale
and at the most, six seconds, atleast six seconds of an exhale.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
This just came to me.
Yes, tell me, i'm reading this.
The last podcast that I did waswith Carla in April, and then
April texted her and I something, and it has to do exactly with
what you just said.
Okay, she sends this.
God answered in the name hegave.
Is recorded in the originalHebrew is Y-H-W-H.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Yahweh.
Speaker 1 (33:05):
But that's the way it's recorded.
Over the centuries humans havearbitrarily added an A and an E
in there to get Yahweh,presumably because we have a
preference for vowels.
There was a moment in time whenMoses had the courage to ask
God what his name is.
Perhaps this is why Yahweh wasconsidered an unspeakable name,
(33:28):
because quite literally, it isnot supposed to be spoken but
breathed.
But scholars and rabbis havenoted that the letters Y-H-W-H
represent breathing sounds oraspirated consonants.
When pronounced withoutintervening vowels, it actually
(33:49):
sounds like breathingY-H-N-H-W-H-X-Hell.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Yahweh.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
Y-H-W-H, our God has given us his name as our very
breath of life, A constantreminder for us that it is only
because of him that we live.
He is our life sustaining power, And when you said that, I was
just like that's what that is.
You were breathing, You had thespiritual knowing and you had
(34:22):
this practice and you were beinghealed by that.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
So in the Sanskrit the word pranayama literally
translates to breath of life,And we know that.
They know how sacred that isAnd that is creator.
That's creator connection.
It blew my mind that and then,knowing that and visualizing
(34:50):
like literally the breath oflife in me while I'm trying to
come back, so like my inhaleswere, i could maybe get two
seconds in worth And then I'dstart to exhale and I'd be
coughing up a storm.
So it started off super smallbut I was able to like push and
push and I knew like it's okay.
Also, you know a little bit TMI, the whole coughing and peeing
(35:14):
all over myself.
Yeah, i literally like had thembring me extra towels and I
would like wrap my body intowels because I'd be sitting
there and I cough and I'd likeprobably pee on myself, you know
.
And so during the breathing,like I'm like wrapped up in
towels, like a big baby diaper,and I'm like breathing and like
allowing myself to cough up thisjunk, and then more inhales,
(35:37):
more exhales and pushing, andthe more I knew it, if I can
push harder, cough more, it'sokay, i can get out of here
faster.
I knew it.
And, sure enough, he came backto see me two days later.
He came back to see me a dayafter that, the day after I
started, and he goes back to thepaperwork and he pulls it out
and he looks at me and he says,oh my gosh.
(35:58):
He goes, you are doing so good.
He said I'm gonna.
I think I'm gonna put, i canput you on oxygen.
Now He says you want to trysome oxygen?
I was like, yes, i do.
I was like.
I want it because I need to goto the bathroom by myself.
I need to just dive laughingbecause it's such an ordeal to
like even get up.
(36:18):
Number one, you know.
and then number two it would belike having to like disconnect
and reconnect my own oxygen inorder to like take myself to the
bathroom, to connect to like alittle take, you know.
So, like the first couple oftimes like I had they had to
help me do it anyways, you know,And once I learned how they did
it, I did it on my own and Ididn't tell anybody.
I was like, yeah, I'm with thebathroom myself.
It was fantastic just knowinghow to be able to do that and
(36:42):
get myself out of there.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
I love that.
That's amazing, yeah.
So how long were you in the?
Speaker 2 (36:47):
hospital.
So, yeah, they were after Istarted that, and then, my
miracle, the whole thing.
I was only in there for ninedays.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
Wow, that's it, yeah.
And they.
They thought it was going to betwo months.
They thought it was going to betwo months, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
I had a crazy appetite, which is fantastic
because I hadn't eaten in liketwo and a half weeks, yeah, and
I was like staying up later justbecause I was like I was head
set for so long.
So I'm like, okay, stayinglater.
And Josh brought me an iPad andso I could watch movies.
So I finally got to my bag likefour days later, like I'm in my
(37:20):
bag and I get to call him andface time him for the first time
and, oh, it was just thesweetest thing.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
You know, get to see my baby and yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, so it was just amazing, i'm so sorry you went
through all that.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I'm just glad that you're okay.
In my life, in your life, in somany people's lives that we
know in our family, it justfeels like it's been such a huge
attack on everyone and insteadof saying, well, why didn't you
do this or why didn't you dothat?
You know, I've been there andI'm just trying to survive or
(37:58):
keep my kid alive, you know, andit has nothing to do with
anybody else You but that so.
I get that.
It's just so thankful you'reokay.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
It's my story and I wanna tell it.
I want people to know like,dude, i love you and you didn't
hear from me because this, thisand this you know what I mean.
Like I was dead, like you know,like I'm not, i don't ghost
people, you know.
No, you don't, You know I justliterally was becoming a ghost,
like that's it.
You know, Oh my gosh Somethingstupid like that.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
Yeah, but so from there, how has it changed?
Speaker 2 (38:33):
your life.
So I really feel like on aspiritual level, that I'm in
this whole new version of myself, 100% Like I didn't pass to the
other side and like have likethe near death but I got pretty
darn close And then coming backthe way that I did, i feel like
this whole new like purposethere's purpose.
(38:55):
There is And there was purposebefore you know.
I always felt like I was meantfor something you know And we
all should feel that way.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yeah, that's why we're here.
I just have.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
I had like amazing parents that instilled that in
me like all the time.
So I knew, you know when I hadthat confidence.
But after this it's just, it'sso much more.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
It's lighter, it's freer.
Yeah, you feel it more it flows, probably through you, more.
There's not a lot of stopsthere.
And then when you realize, whenyou come to you know a trauma,
near death experience like that,or losing someone, that you
gotta live every day like it'syour last, because you just
(39:36):
don't know, and even if you do,end up average living to what 85
, 90,?
you know you don't have a lot oftime left.
So why are we holding back thegifts that we could be sharing
with other people, Like a wordof healing?
you know You could saysomething to someone and the
Holy Spirit's totally using youand flowing it through your
(39:58):
mouth And it feels so easy andit's a gift for them and it
could change them for the restof their life.
You know, Absolutely Yeah, Andit's not our job or who.
It's the Holy Spirit's job totouch that person.
It's just are we blockingourselves from the Holy Spirit
and from communication to beable to share, Because we're not
(40:19):
close enough, we don't have aclose enough relationship, we
don't know what his voice soundslike, we don't know what our
communication is And then, whenwe do get bits of information or
intuition or gut feels, wequestion it, We question it, we
deny it, we blow it off.
But I wanna encourage anyone outthere that if you have that,
(40:39):
you hear it, you feel it, justgo with it once and see what
happens, Because it'll blow yoursocks off really.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
We should all be living in this idea that we're
so much more than this physicalbody and being able to speak
beyond that for other peoplethat feels stuck and don't know
that there's more to life thanjust what you can feel and see
And I feel like that'sliberating, so that by itself
(41:08):
and being able to share withpeople.
Popular Podcasts
United States of Kennedy
United States of Kennedy is a podcast about our cultural fascination with the Kennedy dynasty. Every week, hosts Lyra Smith and George Civeris go into one aspect of the Kennedy story.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.