July 7, 2025 • 63 mins
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
You are now entering the prism. Go.
What up? So this is not breaking for
anybody who's listening, but it is breaking for you, literally.
(00:22):
As we ended the recording session last week, the cops
raided the fish tank house and kicked everybody out.
The show's over. Like permanently, they're going
to figure. Something else out, but the
season's over. It ended that day.
Good. That was depressing to watch.
I know. Just just the environment.
(00:42):
Like, I didn't understand the importance of, like, set design
until I saw that set. Yeah.
And that was a problem. Yeah.
Hugh that looked like where crimes took place.
Hugh, after he listened to the episode, he goes, it's great how
you don't like fish tank, have never watched fish tank and you
hate fish tank and you made an episode about fish tank and I'm
(01:04):
like, this is the way. Yeah, it was extremely
distressing. Yeah, it was a problem, and
anyone who tells me otherwise iswrong.
Yeah, he's mad at me because I keep calling him a rat.
Is he narc? No, because he looks like a rat.
(01:27):
Jesus Christ dude, you're going to be like one of the first
adult men that's been put in a trash can since the 80s.
I love Hugh and I love his rat ways.
Hugh will like bulge a disc throwing you in a trash.
Can this is probably true, but yeah, so fish tank died and I
(01:52):
think you killed it. You know what, If that's the
only power I have in this world,then I'm glad I had it and I
regret nothing. Yeah, I I get it.
So what do you have? We're going to look at the
lyrics from a song based on the musical Grease.
(02:19):
Slam Frank and Frank the Musical.
You never heard of it? Nope.
Nope. What song are we looking at?
Summer Lovin. Oh yeah, I feel like we've done
this before. I don't know that we have.
(02:41):
We may have talked about it, butI don't think that we've brought
the right amount of light to it.Summer nights, OK.
Oh yeah. Summer nights, Even though the
correct naming convention would dictate.
It's called summer lovin. Not in musical format.
(03:06):
Yeah. There's no basis behind what you
said there. So you're just wrong, Russell.
Like in the format of a musical,they tend to put.
Nah. Yeah, that's usually where they
put the. That's what the title usually
is. Is whatever.
Like the emphasis is at the end.Nah, man.
Chorus. It's all about the chorus, That
hook. Not in musicals.
(03:30):
Oh, I forgot you were a thespian.
Yeah. I stand corrected.
The floor is yours, Russell. Although I'm probably wrong, I
just kind of. I'm pretending that I know
anything because I'm thinking that's the.
Entire foundation of our. It's like defying gravity.
(03:53):
Popular stars. That's one that doesn't really
have a chorus though. Dream to dream because like a
lot of musicals don't have choruses.
Like especially like the classical musicals don't have
(04:16):
like the songs don't really havea chorus.
It's a it's like a monologue, but to song.
Yeah, well, this one specifically does have kind of a
returning. Yeah, this is a not a musical,
this is a. It's a musical.
No, this is a it's a musical gayguys attempt at being cool.
(04:43):
Who directed Grease? I have.
No idea. Came out in 1978.
I feel like it's older than thatbut.
I thought it was the 80s, but I mean, I guess it's.
It's almost the 80s. Let's see.
(05:04):
Randall Kaiser. You think he escaped from
Germany because they would have found out about him?
Randall Kaiser, an American filmmaker.
Early life. Let's see.
(05:28):
No early life on, OK all right. He was born in Lebanon, PA.
OK, there you go. There you go.
Yeah, yeah, OK. Yeah, just a regular guy,
(05:49):
extremely homosexual guy. He has an advanced closet.
Yeah, well, I mean, let's see. What else?
Blue Lagoon. Oh, he's a pedophile.
Interesting. This is the movie where you see
what's her name's boobs. And she was, like, 15.
I can't remember her name. Oh, God.
(06:12):
Yeah. Brooke Shields.
So you can't even like, buy thatmovie anymore?
Yep. Pretty sure you still can, yeah.
I feel like that should be illegal.
I feel like it is illegal. Yeah, I mean the old skirt, that
Romeo and Juliet movie still available.
No, it's not. Yes, it is.
No way. Yes, it is.
(06:34):
I can't remember. It was like, no.
No, no, no, no, no. Don't search it up online.
You've already like, dinged me twice.
I'm already on thin ice with theFBI at the moment, I'm sure.
So this is his filmography, Honey, I blew up the kids.
(06:56):
OK, OK, wait, hold on. I'm I'm turning, I'm turning
back on him. So you got Blue Lagoon, Grease,
Flight of the Navigator, all those are like movies that at
least some people have heard of.And then you just got a whole
bunch of nothings. You got returned to Blue Blue
(07:18):
Lagoon and then you got Big Top Pee Wee, a Pee Wee Herman movie.
Yep. Honey I Blew Up the Kid.
A sequel in the Honey I Shrunk the Kids franchise.
Or as I like to call it, the Honey Eye franchise.
(07:43):
A franchise that ruined Mick Rick Moranis his life and got
his wife killed. I don't know if that's true, but
I'm going to go with that. Didn't he get beat up on the
streets? Rick Moranis.
Yeah, look at him. Probably.
Almost certainly. He's coming back, though,
(08:03):
because Mel Brooks is directing from a chair 300 miles away over
Zoom. We'll be directing Spaceballs
too. Nice.
Good. Yeah, I know.
He stepped away from acting for a.
While yeah, it was after his wife died.
So it was like to raise his son or something.
I think it was because his wife was killed by Harvey Weinstein
(08:28):
and he just didn't like that life anymore.
But then when Mel Brooks, who isdefinitely worse than Harvey
Weinstein just going by age, decided he wanted to make
another movie, he's like, I'm in.
I need another yacht. Mel Brooks is 99 years old.
(08:51):
He's got to be a rapist. I don't think you can be that
old in Hollywood and not have raped somebody.
Helen Mirren, we're coming for you.
What's wild is the Harvey Weinstein didn't even have a
penis and he was doing it. He had something.
He had a nub, yeah. He had a pseudo vagina.
(09:16):
An assault nub, Yeah. Yeah, but there's I know we
don't. Talk about politics.
But something cool happened. We saved $200.
Now on what? On the purchase of safety
equipment. What does that even mean?
The means of my ears aren't going to have to explode every
single time because I was too cheap to buy a silencer.
(09:40):
Oh no, that's not happening. It's got to happen.
It's not. Did you say that that passed?
Yeah, it didn't. Yeah, it did.
It hasn't yet. You don't know why?
Because I live here and nothing good is going to happen while
I'm here. You know what?
I figured out why you have like your Standing Sleep episodes so
(10:02):
that we can warp you into another reality so good things
can happen. Yeah, let me see, because I
haven't heard anything about that.
No, the triple B. Oh yeah, no, that's not in
there. Look it up.
There's no way. Look.
It up, they were going to take the registration requirement out
(10:29):
as well, but they were like. No, we're just going to make it
free. It's not free.
You still have to pay for postage and your Internet bill
eliminates $200 fee. Oh good, the Hill cannot be
reached. Good, I'm glad I don't want to
(10:50):
read the Hill. NRAILA Congress passes Big
beautiful bill now headed to Trump.
It'd be funny if he fucking beat.
Yeah, I thought about that. You fought so hard for this.
Like you guys are not allowed togo on vacation till you get this
(11:10):
done. Yeah, I guarantee he has no idea
what's in that bill. But it has his name on it, so
he's happy. Yeah.
Has a stink all over it. Major appeal of the NFA
provisions since exception nearly a century ago.
Additionally, the bill opens theNFL, NF, the NFL, the NFA, the
(11:31):
new legal changes. Legal challenges?
Yeah, not good enough. Not good enough, but.
No, there's no buts. Not when it comes to this.
It is still. He had infringed upon.
He had 10,000 pages, He had 10,000 pages and he couldn't fix
(11:52):
it. Thune's secretary is who got it
thrown out. Mike.
Thune. Yeah, he needs to fire her or
him. I probably should not have said
that. Yeah, yeah, that was.
I'm just going to firing on like1 cylinder, so pretend that
(12:20):
didn't happen. So what?
Yeah, I don't know. So you're saying that they.
It was so close to like getting thrown out like because it's not
constitutional, it it's in contradiction.
What's not constitutional? This giant bill restriction.
This giant bill that nobody reads that you think the.
NFA restriction. The National Firearms Act, yes,
(12:42):
that is against the Bible. So that's against just being
alive. And the reason why the assistant
to the regional manager threw itout because?
She's a giant homo. Is because it was not a tax
(13:03):
related thing and so that's why they changed.
It to half of that bullshit isn't related to tax at all.
That was the reasoning that theyhad and.
Here's the thing. Here's the thing.
Here's the thing. The original thing was a tax on
it because we're not allowed to have a registry, right?
It's not a registry when you file for that tax stamp.
(13:23):
Yeah, no, they're not allowed tokeep the the database.
They're not allowed to keep your.
You have to register it, but they're not allowed to look at
it. They're not allowed to keep it,
but they keep forgetting to delete it and they keep paying a
fine for it, and they will keep paying a fine, a fine for it in
perpetuity so they can keep fucking looking at it.
(13:45):
It's ridiculous. Yeah.
So that was like their concession.
It's like, OK, well, we're not going to make people pay for it.
And that goes back to the original point of it.
Now it is solely a registry. And so that's going to throw it
into legal hot water, the original NFA.
We have 1 Thomas Massie. We have 1 Thomas Massie.
(14:07):
Whatever, Russell, be mad. We have 1 Thomas Massie.
Nobody else is. Nobody else is throwing their
hands up and going, hey, what the fuck are we doing?
He said we're going to spend less money.
He said we're not going to go towar.
He said we're not fucking with Iran.
He said we're not going to deal with Israel's bullshit.
(14:31):
What have we done so far? We've spent all of the money and
then some, plus more. He hasn't done anything with
guns because he didn't fight forthat at all.
All he did was call Elon Musk a homosexual because Elon went,
hey, you're doing the opposite of the thing you said you'd do.
(14:53):
And then he bombed A sovereign nation because another nation
wanted him to. You want to know what's crazy?
Israel's not allowed to have nukes either.
You want to know why? Because of the Nuclear
Proliferation Act signed by likeall of the countries in the
(15:13):
world except for Israel. You want to know what they have
A lot of? Fucking nuclear bombs.
I hate this entire government. I hate everything this is.
It's not worth even talking about anymore.
I don't want to deal with this. I like that I was saving 200
(15:35):
bucks so that's pretty cool. You're not saving any money
because you're you had you've been even bought a fucking
holster for your gun. I don't have a gun.
Russell Exactly. So you you're saving 200 bucks
by doing nothing. You're already saving it.
How about you just give me that $200?
Don't have it? But I'm Jewish and it was
promised to me 2000 years. Oh man, yeah.
(16:04):
Happy Birthday, America. Oh yeah, today's the 4th of
July, the day you won your independence.
And then we lost it like 6 yearslater.
You won your independence from agay guy overseas and you are
enslaved by a big gay corporation that is the United
(16:29):
States government. Now he's just close.
The gay guys that enslave you are just closer than they were.
We should have just stayed with them and.
They don't wear the white wigs anymore.
Yes, because we've we only because we stopped giving
syphilis to white people, just Italians and black guys.
(17:00):
Summer Love had me a blast. All right, let's read these
lyrics. So it's summer loving.
Had me a blast. Summer loving happened so fast.
That's a dig. It's a dig.
Yeah, 'cause that's Sandy sayingthat I met a girl.
(17:21):
Crazy for me. Met a boy, cute as can be.
I feel gay saying that. Summer days drifting away 20
Those summer nights. Oh, OK.
Wella, Wella, Wella. Tell me more.
Tell me more. Did you get very far?
(17:44):
Tell me more and. Tell me more, who who sang that?
That OK The T birds no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Under that, who asked The Who posed the question?
Oh, did you get very far? That's duty.
There's a character in Grease named Doody.
Is he Indian? No, but he's a butt hound.
(18:08):
And then the pink ladies tell memore, tell me more.
And then Marty is Marty the big fat ugly one?
I. Have no clue, let.
Me see, 'cause this, this is great.
Have you ever seen grease? Yeah, OK.
Marty is Dina Dinah Manhoff. Alright, let's see.
(18:40):
You can't give me a fucking photo from Green.
There it is. Yep.
Is that her? OK, that's not what I'm thinking
of. No, that's not her either.
I actually like that character. That just gets a real job out of
school. That just lives.
American existence. Yeah.
Fucking Rizzo. Oh yeah, she graduates and then
(19:06):
became a member of the Wu Tang Clan.
Are you serious? But isn't there a guy in the Wu
Tang Clan named Rizzo? I have no idea.
Jesus she was never hot. She was the hottest girl in
school in that fucking movie. No, she was just the meanest.
(19:26):
That's the same thing. Even today, that's the same
thing. What do you talk?
Well, I guess not anymore. Because the hottest girl in
school is a lesbian. No.
Like, because kids these days like being bisexual as a
personality choice. Yeah.
Yeah. Like those kids that made fun of
me last week, I'm surprised noneof them had septum piercings.
(19:50):
Purchase Sexual. But yeah, there is.
Let's see if I can find so BettyRizzo.
I've always thought this was hilarious.
So like, Hollywood had like, a really hard time with, like,
they had a problem casting 70 year olds to play 12 year olds.
(20:14):
Yeah, Yeah. But like, this was crazy.
Yeah, 'cause that is somebody's mom, like 100%.
That's just a lady. Like an old lady.
Yeah, that bags groceries 100%. Or a lunch lady.
Yeah, she looks like she struggles to operate the cash
register. Yeah.
(20:34):
This is the young version of her.
Yeah, it would. Like.
What a weird casting choice. Anyway, let's get back to
singing gay show tunes, OK? Marty.
Does he have like does he have acar?
Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo.Then Danny, the pink ladies and
(20:59):
the T birds, she swam by me, shegot a cramp.
Sandy pink ladies and the the trans birds.
He ran by me, got my suit damp. And pause.
How did I not fucking notice that I've seen this move this
(21:22):
movie like 12 times. I've lost over that every.
Fucking time. That's awesome.
This is a problem. These are like 14 year old 15
year old. Kids.
No, they're seniors. Are they OK?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. All right.
Never mind. Now that I think about it, I
don't know if that was it's graduation's not at the end of
the movie when they like, when it turns into an actual fantasy
(21:45):
film and they fly into the sky. No, it's a good now they're
legal. I mean they are literally legal
the whole time because John Travolta was 65.
Accurate. Speaking of John Travolta, have
you ever seen From Russia With Love, I think is what it's
(22:07):
called. No, I I know of its existence.
It's John Travolta and Jonathan Rhys Myers and they play CIA
agents and John Travolta is justa gay psychopath in that movie.
Gay just because of the undertones of John Travolta
being in the movie and Psychopath by John Travolta
(22:29):
being in the movie. Yeah, it seems like after a
while he started making acting decisions that Nicholas Cage
would have done, like with his overexpressiveness.
Yeah, because I guess Nicholas Cage.
What do you mean after a while? I don't think that was what he
was doing initially. When was the last time you
watched Greece? Cause I've seen it within the
(22:50):
last or no? I think the last time I saw it
was in high school but I've seenclips.
He's not a real person. Yeah.
And never has been. Well, what was he in before
Greece? Fucking Saturday Night Fever,
maybe? The computer's frozen, so I
(23:15):
don't know. Oh, there we go.
You overloaded it with too much porn grease.
I'm trying here. There was a face you could have
clicked on that would have takenyou to exactly what you needed,
but you closed it. No, you actually opened.
It Yep. Saturday Night Fever in 1977.
What a homosexual. Oh, it's from Paris.
(23:38):
With love. From Russia With love is the
James Bond movie. Oh my.
God, he doesn't even look happy.And he was a heartthrob.
He's a real cock throb. My man.
(23:59):
Wait, he was in Carrie? The original one, yeah, I guess
so. OK.
Cool. That doesn't mean I want to look
at it. I want to see what he looks like
in that. Sissy Spacek.
(24:23):
Oh yeah, I do remember that. Did you watch the He?
Looks like Glenn Danzig mother. Tell your children I'm walk my
way. Did you ever watch the remake?
No, I'm pretty sure she plays the mom and then remake.
(24:44):
I don't really care. Way too old to be playing
anyone's mom. Grandmother perhaps?
Well I mean, a scary witch lady needs to be played by an old
scary witch woman. So true.
Anyway, got my suit damp. I saved her life.
(25:05):
She nearly drowned hot. He showed off, splashing around
summer sun. Something's begun.
But uh oh, those summer nights and.
When you read the lyrics, you'relike, wait a second, something's
about to happen, something bad's.
About so I the upcoming lyric I do remember and I do the first
(25:26):
time I heard the song go Hmm strange thing to ask a man.
So tell me more, tell me more. Was it love at first sight?
Just pure innocent innocent The trans birds tell me more, tell
me more. And then Kaniki goes, Did she
put up a fight? 'Cause if your soccer in the
(25:49):
back of the skull out like a light.
Donkey. Puncher, you can do your
business and not even have to take her out.
So took her bowling in the arcade.
We went strolling, drank lemonade, we made out under the
dock. We stayed out till 10:00.
(26:13):
Oh risque summer fling don't mean a thing, but uh oh, those
summer nights. Tell me more, tell me more.
But but you don't got to brag. Tell me more, tell me more
(26:35):
because he sounds like a drag. Oh yeah I feel like they edited
that because Rizzo in my head Canon is much more aggressive
and would have used the term. Because he sounds like a fag.
Exactly. I feel like that was an amended,
like they realize, oh, we're doing a musical.
Oh, I'm sure that word is in that movie somewhere.
(26:58):
No, you're probably right. He got friendly holding my hand.
Well, she got friendly down in the sand and sand in your buns.
He was sweet. Just turned 18.
(27:18):
See. They made it legal.
Yep, we're good. Everybody's porn search history
just turned 18. Barely legal.
Gross. Barely Legal, just turned 18.
Had me a blast. Well, she was good, if you know
(27:41):
what I mean. God, I don't actually summer
heat boy and girl meet. I don't know what a what girl
meet is. It's a roast beef.
Is that like Bussy put the opposite a man's ass?
(28:02):
It's a girl's penis, Bussy. That's just a man's ass girl,
damn it. Hello.
(28:24):
There you go. Yeah, it had it for a second.
No, I didn't. You gotta cup the balls, kind of
shove it in and out for a littlebit to scrub up the contacts,
pull out, then you gotta scrub them.
(28:51):
So like hold that retainer button and just like just back
and forth faster. Oh look away.
I wonder if phantom power is active on that.
I wonder if you can get get zipped.
(29:14):
We're really running a tight ship here.
I have no idea what we just said.
Running a Corvette so just foundout what that was.
A class of ship, yeah, yeah, it's.
A small new ship? Cool.
I don't thought that was just like something that Georgia
(29:36):
Lucas like stole for Star Wars. For the Hammerhead Corvette,
Yeah, yeah. It's like, no, that's actually
just a Navy thing. Yeah, there's a there's one that
I really like. What just fucking happened?
Did you hear that or was that just me?
I'm gonna kill myself. Well.
(30:04):
I hate it here the. Crazy part is like you set mine
up perfectly. Yeah, it works just fine.
I didn't have to do anything with yours, it's always mine.
Yep. When are those cables coming in?
I didn't get that paycheck that I was looking for so.
(30:25):
I haven't been. Paid in a minute.
In a minute. It's fine.
I disagree, but OK. I will walk home though.
Not out of protest because there's no fuel.
I am on 1/4 tank of gas and my wife won't be back until I got.
(30:49):
I can steal some money, it's fine.
Jesus. No, we have cash for this
situation, but oh fuck. So she drove down to Texas.
She gets there, she texts everybody and goes, I made it.
I just need a new windshield. Can one thing one thing go
(31:17):
right? I'm not going to I'm.
Scared to joke about something because I know it's.
It was a rock, a little fucking.IDF All four of her tires made
the trip. A fucking IDF soldier threw a
rock at her because she supportsPalestine.
(31:38):
Not really. It was a but it was a big rock.
Hit her windshield. And so I called her and I was
like, hey, what the fuck? And she goes, Yep.
And I go, how big is it? She goes it's about 1/4 like a
the size of 1/4. That's a big fucking crack.
Yeah, 'cause that's going to spider web.
(32:01):
I hate my life. No, just.
Have her, What's the point anymore?
Have her cruise around on that and then get a ticket.
No have the glass just fly at her.
She wears glasses, she'll be fine.
I can't. I don't know what our deductible
is, but. Probably 1000 bucks.
(32:21):
Yeah, I need to go to Safelite and and see what I can't ours.
My windshield on the Mazda didn't cost that much.
So you were 50 bucks. Yeah.
Nice. Yeah, I fucking I punched it.
That's smart. It's a smart thing to do.
I didn't know I was going to break my windshield.
(32:45):
What other outcome I don't know.Did it just get what the fuck is
happening? I don't know Corvettes.
Are hello, hold on, hello, Hello, hello, wait, why is it
(33:11):
hello? Why is it doing that?
I don't know what's going on now.
Did we? We never did.
Are we coming through the speakers?
Are we coming through the speakers?
Why is it echoing so bad? It's fine.
(33:34):
Oh, it's like, really bad. Yeah.
So Spacey. Yeah, why?
OK, what are you my? The world's just gaslighting
you, Russell. This didn't happen.
None of this exists. All these problems that you're
having are fabricated and in your head.
(33:56):
Fuck it. And I'm in your head and stereo.
Tell me more. Tell me more.
How much did he spend? Tell me more.
Tell him. Oh, how much dough did he spend?
Yeah, so sorry. That was important, wasn't it?
Yep. Tell me more.
Tell me more. Could he?
Could she get me a friend? I got you got to love a Sonny.
(34:21):
He turned colder. That's where it ends.
So I told her we'd still be friends.
Then we made our true love vow, Huh?
(34:41):
Yeah, it's a little backwards. You would expect it to.
Somebody gave up. Yeah, in writing this and then.
Dude, stop. Stop touching.
Stuff. Hello this is bad.
Quit touching things, summon it.Is that better?
(35:08):
I fixed it. I fixed it.
I don't know how but I fixed it.You're going to ruin something
else. Though I'm going to ruin my
pants. Yeah.
Summer dreams ripped at the scene.
OK. Now pause.
That's definitely not a hymen reference.
(35:29):
No, it's a boner reference. Do you got another one of those?
Yeah. Can I have one?
Yeah. Where are they?
Right here. Oh, Jesus.
Help. I fixed it.
Nice. Fuck yeah.
(35:59):
Yeah, Grease is a fucked up movie.
Yeah, it's weird, but my favorite movie is the original
Romeo and Juliet. Because of the child porn dude.
Do you know the exact minute and2nd that it shows?
Up with the phone, we watched itin English class.
Did you destroy the tape on the VHS?
(36:21):
So at that spot. We watched it in English class
in 7th grade and. I'm imagining half the guys in
the bag. You were like, nice.
So I'm trying to remember how itwent.
(36:41):
So she, the teacher watches it every year with the students.
I'd get it. She's a guidance counselor now,
so. She's guidancing them toward a
life of sin, but she. Would hit the button on the
screen to like turn it off when that moment happens and then
(37:04):
turn it back on. But she hit the volume up button
instead. No, she turned off her monitor
on her computer on accident. I don't know how it happened.
I think what she was doing was like unplugging something, but
she unplugged like the VGA to her monitor instead of for the
thing. I don't know exactly how it
happened, but anyway, yeah, we're watching it and I think
(37:26):
maybe somebody was like, here itcomes, here it comes and it just
showed her tits. And we look back and she goes.
I turned off my screen and. Then one of the guys like as
they're leaving the, the class slips are like a 20.
Thanks, Teach. Yeah.
(37:47):
But yeah, that was crazy. Crazy awesome.
Yeah, 'cause I was in 7th grade,maybe.
See. That I feel like it's OK for
you. I feel like there is.
A yeah, child porn's OK if it's for you kids.
Yeah, yeah. Certainly rabbit child.
Porn, it's for kids, always was.Can't you?
(38:11):
Like legally, if you're like a 15 year old with a cell phone,
you take a picture of your penis, get charged with child
porn. Yeah, well.
Yeah, I think so. But what are they going to do?
Put you in prison with all of the rapists.
Don't be sending Dick pics. Maybe that's the move that the
(38:33):
the left is gonna make to try tolimit the amount of stuff out
there. I'm really trying to help to
save us. From ourselves making it legal
for kids to. Make it illegal and then also
start prosecuting to that extent.
The left is gonna do that. I.
Think so, yeah. Make it illegal for kids to
(38:55):
watch porn. No to the left.
Is gonna do that. Do that to themselves, yeah.
The left is going to make it illegal for kids.
To watch porn because it's like considered an aggression to send
a Dick pic to a woman. No, the left is going to go.
We need to make kids watch porn as part of their curriculum.
But only old man balls. Not young baby.
(39:15):
Boy, it's. Guy on guy only?
Yeah, that's what do you mean? The right is the people that's
making it illegal to watch porn if you don't have a license, if
you don't, if you don't, if you don't show that shifty Jew from
(39:37):
Canada your government ID, you cannot go on Pornhub.
Really. Yeah, in Texas and in Oklahoma,
I think, huh? Yeah.
You got to like register and like have your ID and everything
you never heard of. This I think I remember the
Texas one. Yeah, I don't know if it's here,
but yeah. That's fucking wild.
(40:00):
Well, it's stupid because what it's doing is just putting
people onto fringe websites thatdon't have that restriction.
I think that the unsolicited Dick pic stuff has a big left
problem though. That's.
That leftists send each other unsolicited Dick pics, Yes.
(40:23):
I feel like to protect victims. That guys that dress up as women
send children pictures of their penis.
Yes, I do believe that is a problem on the left.
You are right. That dudes keep raping children.
Yeah, that is a left problem. You're think so?
Yeah, I think that I think dudesraping children is a problem
(40:43):
that happens mostly on the left,other than in the Catholic
Church. Yeah.
Exactly, I was about to say. We don't consider them dudes
except for the Pope. Nice.
But yeah, yeah, no, yeah, Tricksis for kids.
(41:09):
And Dick pics. Is for kids as well.
There is an SD card floating around Wisconsin with a picture
of my penis on it. I don't know where it is.
Oh, someone's going to get burned hard.
I'm sure it's in my house and they're in my parents old house.
It's. Like in the baseboards, some,
(41:31):
like Renault companies are goingto.
I'm not going to say where, but I do have, I do there.
I there's a spot in the house where I think I know where it
is. I'm breaking into that house one
day. Just to burn the evidence?
No, because I got. So you could be.
In there possession of child porn no.
I got that's my penis and. Then you're like, you're in
court having to defend yourself.You stand up dramatically on the
(41:53):
fucking witness stand. You pulled out your pants.
I have a break mark on the tip of my penis so it's pretty easy
to match. And it just never grew.
It's still the same size your your lawyer's like I rest my
case, I do. Remember, because I took it on
this really shitty digital camera that I had gotten for my
birthday. And I do remember like looking
at it and being really disappointed because it was a it
(42:14):
was like really fat like like I wasn't really necessarily
disappointed than the length. Like I was like it could be
bigger, but I did my best to make it as big as possible,
right? But it was just real thick and I
wasn't super pleased about it. That's not a thing, that's a
problem. I know, I just didn't like the
(42:36):
look of it and it was a different colour than the rest
of my body. Like someone stacked extra.
Because I'm in my basement. I'm in my basement.
The walls are white and we have,like, those bright fluorescent
lights, you know? It's a dungeon down there, Yeah.
(42:58):
Where child porn is made. Exactly and so.
Like the show for a fish tank? Yeah, and there's a mirror on on
the wall and I and A treadmill in front of the mirror.
And then I'm standing, you know,behind the treadmill and looking
at the mirror and taking the picture and the way that the
(43:20):
treadmill 'cause it's like lengthwise this way like I'm
you're approaching. The side of.
It Yeah, yeah. So like where the where like the
console of the treadmill is likethat is like casting a shadow
and I'm pasty fucking white right.
And so all my Dick has a weird like green tint to it because of
(43:43):
the shadow because I'm already agrey human being and.
Everybody's doing a different colour on.
Everybody. Is that the name of your penis
is Bruce? No, it's Bruce Banner.
No, it's Larry Bird, because Larry Bird's nickname was the
legend. So the.
(44:08):
Oh yeah, so. Like got good ball control.
Because of like the shadow and everything.
Like there was like a green tintto my shaft and I was like why
is this happening to me? And you only had enough space
for like one more shot you couldn't risk.
It no. I got discouraged and I just
took the SD card out and hit it.I don't know why I kept it.
(44:29):
'Cause you kind of like the It'skind of good, yeah.
So yeah, I don't, you know, but yeah, that.
Dude, Can you imagine how terrifying it is to go purchase?
Like go to like a thrift store, like a Goodwill or something and
(44:49):
just purchase like an SD card. Yeah, dude, that's a dice roll.
Well, I mean like if you found it, would you turn it in or
would you burn it? I'd.
Shred it. I'd shred it and burn it.
(45:16):
I feel like you should. Turn dude, I'm about to turn you
in. I just.
Want to stop? That's on mine.
Dude. That's a baby.
I know. Stop.
But imagine being a 7th grader. In that context, it would be
sweet. So.
We're old men. So when this movie came out or
(45:40):
when this movie came out, this is from like the Sixties, 1968,
I thought the guy that played Romeo was Zac Efron.
And so I thought this was all happening like today, but like
back when I was in 7th grade. So I was like, I could find her.
I looked her up and she was like80.
(46:01):
EW. Died at 73.
Where does it say that? Her name is Hussey on the thing
you clicked. Oh yeah, Yep, Elizabeth Hussey.
And she really was 1. Yep, that's accurate.
It was such a like, the shot wascompletely pointless too.
(46:28):
Like the director was probably like just a pet.
Well, I guess all directors are.So yeah, the director is just a
pedophile because the scene is they are.
They had like, spent the night together and.
And then they wake up because the sun's, like, coming through
(46:48):
the window and it wakes them up and they're like, oh, shit.
And he's got to run, you know, before her parents see him.
And it's just a quick shot of her, like, turning over and you
just see one boob just flop over.
Yeah. And and so like, there was no
(47:09):
reason for her to be naked in this scene at all.
Yeah, I did not serve the movie.Yeah, whatsoever.
Super fucked up and the movie was like PG at the time.
Really. Yeah, you can catch some sloppy
tit PG. Yeah, we're like back.
In PG13 days like the Goonies I think they drop an F bomb.
(47:29):
Yeah, you can still drop F bombsin The Goonies or in PG13
movies, it just can't be in reference to actual fucking.
I've looked this up I. Think it's changed?
No, yeah, it's gotten. More shrimp on this, but so
yeah, that's what I'm saying. So you can say.
(47:52):
Because wasn't that like a big deal in The Wolverine and
Deadpool stuff? Like they can say the word now.
Yeah, because it's rated R, but it's not.
So it's, it's the context it which is set in and it also is
on a spectrum it it goes to a board of people and they watch
the movie and they give it a rating based on it as a whole.
(48:17):
So what directors do is they'll aim for a rating, but.
And when they don't even try, itjust goes.
R Well, they yes, well, I kinda,yeah.
But the studio that's paying forit would have a fit if.
Yeah, it's at a certain point you'll you'll have to cut stuff
out and that's where you'll get an unrated cut.
(48:39):
Oh so. The director's cut the the copy
to. Of the.
The director's circumcision, which is really just an unrated
cut, is really just the. Original movie as filmed.
No, it's just a fake rated R stamp.
It's just a stamp. It's just rated R and they just
(49:02):
stamp it on there for advertising.
Because in reality, if it's in aplastic clamshell box, there's
no real rape in it. It's all fake rape.
You have to watch like movies that you find online to find
like like you have to. Go to Goodwill and then start
grabbing. Yeah, you have to go to Goodwill
and follow somebody into the changing room.
(49:26):
Yeah, like that unrated is just for advertising, but the way
that it has kind of always been,and it's gotten a little like
through the age has gotten stricter and lenient like in
different places. But for the most part, you can't
say shit in rated PG13 movies ifyou're describing excrement.
(49:49):
But you can say it if you're saying oh shit.
But if you say it a whole bunch of times, that's going to push
your rating to R And the same thing with fuck.
You can say oh fuck, are you fucking kidding me?
But you can't say let's fuck. It just is completely about
(50:09):
context. Like that is kind of how they
rate stuff and then tits are offlimits and then pussy is just
completely off limits. But we can see penis.
Because they're funny. I guess.
I don't think anyone's ever seriously said that's a handsome
penis. I think everyone just laughs
(50:32):
because again, penises are just funny.
Yeah, I don't. I've never seen a handsome
penis. I always got him first of all,
my pastor said I have a very handsome penis.
Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen a handsome penis.
I've seen some pretty ugly penises, like that one from Hall
(50:56):
Pass. Yep, that one's crazy.
It's really, really upsetting for your manager to talk to me
about that movie. Yeah, he's brought it up.
Three other times yesterday he was quoting Blazing Saddles in
my meeting where he was telling me that he is not writing me up
(51:17):
for something. He's at the end of it.
We were talking shop about the movie Blazing Saddles.
He goes where are all the white women at?
And then there's that scene fromAirplane.
It's my favorite scene that I'veseen.
I haven't seen the movie, but I keep seeing this clip.
(51:40):
I really need to watch this movie.
Can you say scene one more time?Scene.
Thank you. Sorry, Skein.
Not as satisfying. Where it's the two black guys
and the stewardess comes up to talk to him and she can't
understand him. And this old lady comes up
behind and she goes, it's OK, I got it.
I speak jive. Oh yeah.
(52:04):
Yeah, I remember that. I love that.
That movie is so packed with jokes constantly.
Yeah, dude, have you ever had Cajun cheese Nuggets or cheese
(52:25):
curds? They're the same.
Thing you mean, have I ever fucked a southern French white
man? Is that what you're saying?
Yeah. No, he's like French.
Yeah. What are you talking about?
Cheese Nuggets? What the fuck is that?
(52:46):
It's a cheese curd. OK, that's a cheese curd.
Yeah, which is a nugget of cheese.
No, Yeah, no, a curd is a specific material.
Yeah, you can have a curd nugget, I guess, but a cheese
nugget and a cheese curd would be very different things.
(53:06):
A nugget is the form, the shape,something is taking.
Yeah, a curd is a physical specimen.
Of cheese. Why are you here?
And they call. You here just to hurt me.
Everyone else has and I'm just jumping on the bandwagon.
It feels good to be on the winning side for once.
(53:28):
You're. Doing that laughing and it makes
you really uncomfortable becauseyou did this earlier today when
I like opened the door just out of your.
Eyesight. It was terrifying.
There was that specific laugh. There's like a weird wheezing
thing where you just didn't inhale for the longest.
You don't have lung capacity to just exhale for as long as you
did. I have better lung capacity than
(53:49):
my dad does. Hey, it's not funny.
I almost died. The man's drowning standing up.
Yeah, that was weird. My wife got some and I'm looking
(54:09):
forward to that. Cheese curds?
Yeah. I was just wondering if putting
Cajun spices on them is a bastardization of cheese.
In your Wisconsin sensibilities,no.
Because if that would be then then deep frying cheese curds
would be a bastardization and I'd never blasphemy the holy
(54:33):
Culver's. Praise be, yeah.
I ate 14 taquitos between when Iclocked out and when I came.
Here are. You talking like tornado sized
or like the smaller? No, they fucking.
(54:53):
I go to the. I went to Casey's and they had
like 2 boxes of 15 taquitos and.Like microwave ones or?
Yeah, like the OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you now.
Yeah. And.
You drop 1. I did drop one on my way out the
door earlier, but no, I threw itout 'cause there's poop on that
(55:16):
floor. Why'd you poop poop on the?
Floor. It wasn't me, it was the demon
Chihuahua with no team. It's not a Chihuahua if it
doesn't have teeth, it's a gum wall.
It's a diarrhoea Wawa. Actually, that thing doesn't
even sit to shit. He's just pre lupinous.
(55:37):
Yeah, she's just. So when death fucks, it's just.
Goobbering out of her. I didn't.
I don't. That's the only way.
That's the only that's the only verb that I have is goobbering.
That's yeah, she goobers her shit out of her ass.
Does the owner like keep this dog around as a portable pocket
pussy or something that'll that's the only thing that
(55:57):
explains is things existence? They found her outside of like a
Home Depot. And didn't leave it.
Yeah. They resuscitated roadkill,
Yeah. It was just a Maria was just a
migrant Chihuahua looking for a job and they just they kidnapped
her. I should fucking call ICE
(56:20):
actually. Yeah, no, they found her like
outside of a Home Depot or something like 20 years ago.
That would be a really funny joke.
If they probably wouldn't shoot them, shoot the.
Dogs, I see. Yeah.
But but yeah, it's old. It's old.
(56:43):
It only farts in liquid. I just imagine trying to bark.
At the door then I don't know. I don't know if like this shit
has like isopropyl alcohol in itbut it dries so fast.
It's all solvents. Yeah, it's it like immediately
(57:05):
evaporates and so it like adheres to the carpet
immediately. It's disgusting.
Do you smell smoke? Did you fart?
I mean, it's 4th of July. Yeah, but it smells like
cigarette smoke. Probably there's like 1-2 three
(57:28):
holes on that wall. That's true, yeah.
Yeah, I definitely smell it. Yeah.
OK, I just don't want him to think it was us.
But anyway. It won't matter if it was.
What's he going to do, fire me? I want to quit anyway.
(57:51):
Yeah, that dog is. It happened again.
Yeah. Let me see if I can fix it.
Hello. Yeah.
Why? Hello?
Why? Whatever What?
(58:20):
Good. I pay into this.
You just saved me a bill. Enjoy.
Yeah. Jesus.
Christ. Well, that wasn't good.
(58:42):
Russell, quit rusting it. That is awful.
Did I fix it? I think I fixed it.
I mean, I didn't fix it. We.
Just don't hear ourselves. So I guess that is.
A Wait, you don't hear yourself?No.
Oh damn it, how about now? Yeah.
(59:03):
Are you hearing it now, Mr. Krebs?
Nope. Seriously.
Yeah, not hearing it. It's like up very high.
Well, I'm sorry. They're up now.
It's gone, I hear. Yep, there we.
Go shit that was this is going to be unusable.
I'm going to check our with our receptionist to make sure that
(59:27):
we're not on fire the. Truck just left.
What truck? Oh, OK.
He vapes, he should not be smoking.
He does both. This is America doesn't.
Fucking feel like it does it. I don't know people are saving
$200 out there. No, they're not.
(59:52):
What is the most inconvenient place that you peed your pants?
In my bed yesterday. No, right now I was wearing
footy pyjamas. I was too old.
That is super unfortunate. I was too old to be wearing
footy pyjamas, but like so I wasyoung, but I was old enough to
(01:00:18):
not piss my pants and I did do it on purpose.
I really had to pee Where at my grandma's house up in Wisconsin
for Christmas. I don't know what part in the
Christmas vacation that we were that this was it could have been
right before right after, but itwas during Christmas vacation.
We usually spend the whole week or week and a half there and I
(01:00:42):
just, I'm laying in bed and I'm just too lazy to get up and I
got to pee. I'm wearing footy pajamas and so
I just pee and then I get up to go tell my mom I peed my pants.
(01:01:10):
It really did not work out in mypaper.
Russell, you have college tours tomorrow.
What are you doing? Yeah, you need to be in bed
asleep. Why is it doing this?
(01:01:31):
Oh man. Why?
I just lost the entire right half of my hearing.
Really. Yeah, good.
How about now? Still shitty.
Well, you know what? Up, up.
I'm literally just touching. I'm touching nothing now.
I'm hearing. About now, Yep.
(01:01:55):
Yep, Yep, it's almost back. There it is.
Are you serious? Yes, quit touching shit.
I literally did this. Russell, it's gone, now it's
back. Quit farting at the board.
Fired pot shots. What is happening?
Now we have to gut the board, clean it and throw it back
(01:02:17):
together. I'm going to gut.
I just, I don't want to be here anymore.
Can we go? Yeah, we can call it.
I haven't ever pissed my pants ever.
I'm going to have that on record.
You pissed your pants this morning.
You swore. Yeah, I called you a faggot.
(01:02:40):
You're right. All right.
Love you guys. Bye.
You are now entering the prism. Go.
What up? So this is not breaking for
anybody who's listening, but it is breaking for you, literally.
(00:22):
As we ended the recording session last week, the cops
raided the fish tank house and kicked everybody out.
The show's over. Like permanently, they're going
to figure. Something else out, but the
season's over. It ended that day.
Good. That was depressing to watch.
I know. Just just the environment.
(00:42):
Like, I didn't understand the importance of, like, set design
until I saw that set. Yeah.
And that was a problem. Yeah.
Hugh that looked like where crimes took place.
Hugh, after he listened to the episode, he goes, it's great how
you don't like fish tank, have never watched fish tank and you
hate fish tank and you made an episode about fish tank and I'm
(01:04):
like, this is the way. Yeah, it was extremely
distressing. Yeah, it was a problem, and
anyone who tells me otherwise iswrong.
Yeah, he's mad at me because I keep calling him a rat.
Is he narc? No, because he looks like a rat.
(01:27):
Jesus Christ dude, you're going to be like one of the first
adult men that's been put in a trash can since the 80s.
I love Hugh and I love his rat ways.
Hugh will like bulge a disc throwing you in a trash.
Can this is probably true, but yeah, so fish tank died and I
(01:52):
think you killed it. You know what, If that's the
only power I have in this world,then I'm glad I had it and I
regret nothing. Yeah, I I get it.
So what do you have? We're going to look at the
lyrics from a song based on the musical Grease.
(02:19):
Slam Frank and Frank the Musical.
You never heard of it? Nope.
Nope. What song are we looking at?
Summer Lovin. Oh yeah, I feel like we've done
this before. I don't know that we have.
(02:41):
We may have talked about it, butI don't think that we've brought
the right amount of light to it.Summer nights, OK.
Oh yeah. Summer nights, Even though the
correct naming convention would dictate.
It's called summer lovin. Not in musical format.
(03:06):
Yeah. There's no basis behind what you
said there. So you're just wrong, Russell.
Like in the format of a musical,they tend to put.
Nah. Yeah, that's usually where they
put the. That's what the title usually
is. Is whatever.
Like the emphasis is at the end.Nah, man.
Chorus. It's all about the chorus, That
hook. Not in musicals.
(03:30):
Oh, I forgot you were a thespian.
Yeah. I stand corrected.
The floor is yours, Russell. Although I'm probably wrong, I
just kind of. I'm pretending that I know
anything because I'm thinking that's the.
Entire foundation of our. It's like defying gravity.
(03:53):
Popular stars. That's one that doesn't really
have a chorus though. Dream to dream because like a
lot of musicals don't have choruses.
Like especially like the classical musicals don't have
(04:16):
like the songs don't really havea chorus.
It's a it's like a monologue, but to song.
Yeah, well, this one specifically does have kind of a
returning. Yeah, this is a not a musical,
this is a. It's a musical.
No, this is a it's a musical gayguys attempt at being cool.
(04:43):
Who directed Grease? I have.
No idea. Came out in 1978.
I feel like it's older than thatbut.
I thought it was the 80s, but I mean, I guess it's.
It's almost the 80s. Let's see.
(05:04):
Randall Kaiser. You think he escaped from
Germany because they would have found out about him?
Randall Kaiser, an American filmmaker.
Early life. Let's see.
(05:28):
No early life on, OK all right. He was born in Lebanon, PA.
OK, there you go. There you go.
Yeah, yeah, OK. Yeah, just a regular guy,
(05:49):
extremely homosexual guy. He has an advanced closet.
Yeah, well, I mean, let's see. What else?
Blue Lagoon. Oh, he's a pedophile.
Interesting. This is the movie where you see
what's her name's boobs. And she was, like, 15.
I can't remember her name. Oh, God.
(06:12):
Yeah. Brooke Shields.
So you can't even like, buy thatmovie anymore?
Yep. Pretty sure you still can, yeah.
I feel like that should be illegal.
I feel like it is illegal. Yeah, I mean the old skirt, that
Romeo and Juliet movie still available.
No, it's not. Yes, it is.
No way. Yes, it is.
(06:34):
I can't remember. It was like, no.
No, no, no, no, no. Don't search it up online.
You've already like, dinged me twice.
I'm already on thin ice with theFBI at the moment, I'm sure.
So this is his filmography, Honey, I blew up the kids.
(06:56):
OK, OK, wait, hold on. I'm I'm turning, I'm turning
back on him. So you got Blue Lagoon, Grease,
Flight of the Navigator, all those are like movies that at
least some people have heard of.And then you just got a whole
bunch of nothings. You got returned to Blue Blue
(07:18):
Lagoon and then you got Big Top Pee Wee, a Pee Wee Herman movie.
Yep. Honey I Blew Up the Kid.
A sequel in the Honey I Shrunk the Kids franchise.
Or as I like to call it, the Honey Eye franchise.
(07:43):
A franchise that ruined Mick Rick Moranis his life and got
his wife killed. I don't know if that's true, but
I'm going to go with that. Didn't he get beat up on the
streets? Rick Moranis.
Yeah, look at him. Probably.
Almost certainly. He's coming back, though,
(08:03):
because Mel Brooks is directing from a chair 300 miles away over
Zoom. We'll be directing Spaceballs
too. Nice.
Good. Yeah, I know.
He stepped away from acting for a.
While yeah, it was after his wife died.
So it was like to raise his son or something.
I think it was because his wife was killed by Harvey Weinstein
(08:28):
and he just didn't like that life anymore.
But then when Mel Brooks, who isdefinitely worse than Harvey
Weinstein just going by age, decided he wanted to make
another movie, he's like, I'm in.
I need another yacht. Mel Brooks is 99 years old.
(08:51):
He's got to be a rapist. I don't think you can be that
old in Hollywood and not have raped somebody.
Helen Mirren, we're coming for you.
What's wild is the Harvey Weinstein didn't even have a
penis and he was doing it. He had something.
He had a nub, yeah. He had a pseudo vagina.
(09:16):
An assault nub, Yeah. Yeah, but there's I know we
don't. Talk about politics.
But something cool happened. We saved $200.
Now on what? On the purchase of safety
equipment. What does that even mean?
The means of my ears aren't going to have to explode every
single time because I was too cheap to buy a silencer.
(09:40):
Oh no, that's not happening. It's got to happen.
It's not. Did you say that that passed?
Yeah, it didn't. Yeah, it did.
It hasn't yet. You don't know why?
Because I live here and nothing good is going to happen while
I'm here. You know what?
I figured out why you have like your Standing Sleep episodes so
(10:02):
that we can warp you into another reality so good things
can happen. Yeah, let me see, because I
haven't heard anything about that.
No, the triple B. Oh yeah, no, that's not in
there. Look it up.
There's no way. Look.
It up, they were going to take the registration requirement out
(10:29):
as well, but they were like. No, we're just going to make it
free. It's not free.
You still have to pay for postage and your Internet bill
eliminates $200 fee. Oh good, the Hill cannot be
reached. Good, I'm glad I don't want to
(10:50):
read the Hill. NRAILA Congress passes Big
beautiful bill now headed to Trump.
It'd be funny if he fucking beat.
Yeah, I thought about that. You fought so hard for this.
Like you guys are not allowed togo on vacation till you get this
(11:10):
done. Yeah, I guarantee he has no idea
what's in that bill. But it has his name on it, so
he's happy. Yeah.
Has a stink all over it. Major appeal of the NFA
provisions since exception nearly a century ago.
Additionally, the bill opens theNFL, NF, the NFL, the NFA, the
(11:31):
new legal changes. Legal challenges?
Yeah, not good enough. Not good enough, but.
No, there's no buts. Not when it comes to this.
It is still. He had infringed upon.
He had 10,000 pages, He had 10,000 pages and he couldn't fix
(11:52):
it. Thune's secretary is who got it
thrown out. Mike.
Thune. Yeah, he needs to fire her or
him. I probably should not have said
that. Yeah, yeah, that was.
I'm just going to firing on like1 cylinder, so pretend that
(12:20):
didn't happen. So what?
Yeah, I don't know. So you're saying that they.
It was so close to like getting thrown out like because it's not
constitutional, it it's in contradiction.
What's not constitutional? This giant bill restriction.
This giant bill that nobody reads that you think the.
NFA restriction. The National Firearms Act, yes,
(12:42):
that is against the Bible. So that's against just being
alive. And the reason why the assistant
to the regional manager threw itout because?
She's a giant homo. Is because it was not a tax
(13:03):
related thing and so that's why they changed.
It to half of that bullshit isn't related to tax at all.
That was the reasoning that theyhad and.
Here's the thing. Here's the thing.
Here's the thing. The original thing was a tax on
it because we're not allowed to have a registry, right?
It's not a registry when you file for that tax stamp.
(13:23):
Yeah, no, they're not allowed tokeep the the database.
They're not allowed to keep your.
You have to register it, but they're not allowed to look at
it. They're not allowed to keep it,
but they keep forgetting to delete it and they keep paying a
fine for it, and they will keep paying a fine, a fine for it in
perpetuity so they can keep fucking looking at it.
(13:45):
It's ridiculous. Yeah.
So that was like their concession.
It's like, OK, well, we're not going to make people pay for it.
And that goes back to the original point of it.
Now it is solely a registry. And so that's going to throw it
into legal hot water, the original NFA.
We have 1 Thomas Massie. We have 1 Thomas Massie.
(14:07):
Whatever, Russell, be mad. We have 1 Thomas Massie.
Nobody else is. Nobody else is throwing their
hands up and going, hey, what the fuck are we doing?
He said we're going to spend less money.
He said we're not going to go towar.
He said we're not fucking with Iran.
He said we're not going to deal with Israel's bullshit.
(14:31):
What have we done so far? We've spent all of the money and
then some, plus more. He hasn't done anything with
guns because he didn't fight forthat at all.
All he did was call Elon Musk a homosexual because Elon went,
hey, you're doing the opposite of the thing you said you'd do.
(14:53):
And then he bombed A sovereign nation because another nation
wanted him to. You want to know what's crazy?
Israel's not allowed to have nukes either.
You want to know why? Because of the Nuclear
Proliferation Act signed by likeall of the countries in the
(15:13):
world except for Israel. You want to know what they have
A lot of? Fucking nuclear bombs.
I hate this entire government. I hate everything this is.
It's not worth even talking about anymore.
I don't want to deal with this. I like that I was saving 200
(15:35):
bucks so that's pretty cool. You're not saving any money
because you're you had you've been even bought a fucking
holster for your gun. I don't have a gun.
Russell Exactly. So you you're saving 200 bucks
by doing nothing. You're already saving it.
How about you just give me that $200?
Don't have it? But I'm Jewish and it was
promised to me 2000 years. Oh man, yeah.
(16:04):
Happy Birthday, America. Oh yeah, today's the 4th of
July, the day you won your independence.
And then we lost it like 6 yearslater.
You won your independence from agay guy overseas and you are
enslaved by a big gay corporation that is the United
(16:29):
States government. Now he's just close.
The gay guys that enslave you are just closer than they were.
We should have just stayed with them and.
They don't wear the white wigs anymore.
Yes, because we've we only because we stopped giving
syphilis to white people, just Italians and black guys.
(17:00):
Summer Love had me a blast. All right, let's read these
lyrics. So it's summer loving.
Had me a blast. Summer loving happened so fast.
That's a dig. It's a dig.
Yeah, 'cause that's Sandy sayingthat I met a girl.
(17:21):
Crazy for me. Met a boy, cute as can be.
I feel gay saying that. Summer days drifting away 20
Those summer nights. Oh, OK.
Wella, Wella, Wella. Tell me more.
Tell me more. Did you get very far?
(17:44):
Tell me more and. Tell me more, who who sang that?
That OK The T birds no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Under that, who asked The Who posed the question?
Oh, did you get very far? That's duty.
There's a character in Grease named Doody.
Is he Indian? No, but he's a butt hound.
(18:08):
And then the pink ladies tell memore, tell me more.
And then Marty is Marty the big fat ugly one?
I. Have no clue, let.
Me see, 'cause this, this is great.
Have you ever seen grease? Yeah, OK.
Marty is Dina Dinah Manhoff. Alright, let's see.
(18:40):
You can't give me a fucking photo from Green.
There it is. Yep.
Is that her? OK, that's not what I'm thinking
of. No, that's not her either.
I actually like that character. That just gets a real job out of
school. That just lives.
American existence. Yeah.
Fucking Rizzo. Oh yeah, she graduates and then
(19:06):
became a member of the Wu Tang Clan.
Are you serious? But isn't there a guy in the Wu
Tang Clan named Rizzo? I have no idea.
Jesus she was never hot. She was the hottest girl in
school in that fucking movie. No, she was just the meanest.
(19:26):
That's the same thing. Even today, that's the same
thing. What do you talk?
Well, I guess not anymore. Because the hottest girl in
school is a lesbian. No.
Like, because kids these days like being bisexual as a
personality choice. Yeah.
Yeah. Like those kids that made fun of
me last week, I'm surprised noneof them had septum piercings.
(19:50):
Purchase Sexual. But yeah, there is.
Let's see if I can find so BettyRizzo.
I've always thought this was hilarious.
So like, Hollywood had like, a really hard time with, like,
they had a problem casting 70 year olds to play 12 year olds.
(20:14):
Yeah, Yeah. But like, this was crazy.
Yeah, 'cause that is somebody's mom, like 100%.
That's just a lady. Like an old lady.
Yeah, that bags groceries 100%. Or a lunch lady.
Yeah, she looks like she struggles to operate the cash
register. Yeah.
(20:34):
This is the young version of her.
Yeah, it would. Like.
What a weird casting choice. Anyway, let's get back to
singing gay show tunes, OK? Marty.
Does he have like does he have acar?
Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo.Then Danny, the pink ladies and
(20:59):
the T birds, she swam by me, shegot a cramp.
Sandy pink ladies and the the trans birds.
He ran by me, got my suit damp. And pause.
How did I not fucking notice that I've seen this move this
(21:22):
movie like 12 times. I've lost over that every.
Fucking time. That's awesome.
This is a problem. These are like 14 year old 15
year old. Kids.
No, they're seniors. Are they OK?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. All right.
Never mind. Now that I think about it, I
don't know if that was it's graduation's not at the end of
the movie when they like, when it turns into an actual fantasy
(21:45):
film and they fly into the sky. No, it's a good now they're
legal. I mean they are literally legal
the whole time because John Travolta was 65.
Accurate. Speaking of John Travolta, have
you ever seen From Russia With Love, I think is what it's
(22:07):
called. No, I I know of its existence.
It's John Travolta and Jonathan Rhys Myers and they play CIA
agents and John Travolta is justa gay psychopath in that movie.
Gay just because of the undertones of John Travolta
being in the movie and Psychopath by John Travolta
(22:29):
being in the movie. Yeah, it seems like after a
while he started making acting decisions that Nicholas Cage
would have done, like with his overexpressiveness.
Yeah, because I guess Nicholas Cage.
What do you mean after a while? I don't think that was what he
was doing initially. When was the last time you
watched Greece? Cause I've seen it within the
(22:50):
last or no? I think the last time I saw it
was in high school but I've seenclips.
He's not a real person. Yeah.
And never has been. Well, what was he in before
Greece? Fucking Saturday Night Fever,
maybe? The computer's frozen, so I
(23:15):
don't know. Oh, there we go.
You overloaded it with too much porn grease.
I'm trying here. There was a face you could have
clicked on that would have takenyou to exactly what you needed,
but you closed it. No, you actually opened.
It Yep. Saturday Night Fever in 1977.
What a homosexual. Oh, it's from Paris.
(23:38):
With love. From Russia With love is the
James Bond movie. Oh my.
God, he doesn't even look happy.And he was a heartthrob.
He's a real cock throb. My man.
(23:59):
Wait, he was in Carrie? The original one, yeah, I guess
so. OK.
Cool. That doesn't mean I want to look
at it. I want to see what he looks like
in that. Sissy Spacek.
(24:23):
Oh yeah, I do remember that. Did you watch the He?
Looks like Glenn Danzig mother. Tell your children I'm walk my
way. Did you ever watch the remake?
No, I'm pretty sure she plays the mom and then remake.
(24:44):
I don't really care. Way too old to be playing
anyone's mom. Grandmother perhaps?
Well I mean, a scary witch lady needs to be played by an old
scary witch woman. So true.
Anyway, got my suit damp. I saved her life.
(25:05):
She nearly drowned hot. He showed off, splashing around
summer sun. Something's begun.
But uh oh, those summer nights and.
When you read the lyrics, you'relike, wait a second, something's
about to happen, something bad's.
About so I the upcoming lyric I do remember and I do the first
(25:26):
time I heard the song go Hmm strange thing to ask a man.
So tell me more, tell me more. Was it love at first sight?
Just pure innocent innocent The trans birds tell me more, tell
me more. And then Kaniki goes, Did she
put up a fight? 'Cause if your soccer in the
(25:49):
back of the skull out like a light.
Donkey. Puncher, you can do your
business and not even have to take her out.
So took her bowling in the arcade.
We went strolling, drank lemonade, we made out under the
dock. We stayed out till 10:00.
(26:13):
Oh risque summer fling don't mean a thing, but uh oh, those
summer nights. Tell me more, tell me more.
But but you don't got to brag. Tell me more, tell me more
(26:35):
because he sounds like a drag. Oh yeah I feel like they edited
that because Rizzo in my head Canon is much more aggressive
and would have used the term. Because he sounds like a fag.
Exactly. I feel like that was an amended,
like they realize, oh, we're doing a musical.
Oh, I'm sure that word is in that movie somewhere.
(26:58):
No, you're probably right. He got friendly holding my hand.
Well, she got friendly down in the sand and sand in your buns.
He was sweet. Just turned 18.
(27:18):
See. They made it legal.
Yep, we're good. Everybody's porn search history
just turned 18. Barely legal.
Gross. Barely Legal, just turned 18.
Had me a blast. Well, she was good, if you know
(27:41):
what I mean. God, I don't actually summer
heat boy and girl meet. I don't know what a what girl
meet is. It's a roast beef.
Is that like Bussy put the opposite a man's ass?
(28:02):
It's a girl's penis, Bussy. That's just a man's ass girl,
damn it. Hello.
(28:24):
There you go. Yeah, it had it for a second.
No, I didn't. You gotta cup the balls, kind of
shove it in and out for a littlebit to scrub up the contacts,
pull out, then you gotta scrub them.
(28:51):
So like hold that retainer button and just like just back
and forth faster. Oh look away.
I wonder if phantom power is active on that.
I wonder if you can get get zipped.
(29:14):
We're really running a tight ship here.
I have no idea what we just said.
Running a Corvette so just foundout what that was.
A class of ship, yeah, yeah, it's.
A small new ship? Cool.
I don't thought that was just like something that Georgia
(29:36):
Lucas like stole for Star Wars. For the Hammerhead Corvette,
Yeah, yeah. It's like, no, that's actually
just a Navy thing. Yeah, there's a there's one that
I really like. What just fucking happened?
Did you hear that or was that just me?
I'm gonna kill myself. Well.
(30:04):
I hate it here the. Crazy part is like you set mine
up perfectly. Yeah, it works just fine.
I didn't have to do anything with yours, it's always mine.
Yep. When are those cables coming in?
I didn't get that paycheck that I was looking for so.
(30:25):
I haven't been. Paid in a minute.
In a minute. It's fine.
I disagree, but OK. I will walk home though.
Not out of protest because there's no fuel.
I am on 1/4 tank of gas and my wife won't be back until I got.
(30:49):
I can steal some money, it's fine.
Jesus. No, we have cash for this
situation, but oh fuck. So she drove down to Texas.
She gets there, she texts everybody and goes, I made it.
I just need a new windshield. Can one thing one thing go
(31:17):
right? I'm not going to I'm.
Scared to joke about something because I know it's.
It was a rock, a little fucking.IDF All four of her tires made
the trip. A fucking IDF soldier threw a
rock at her because she supportsPalestine.
(31:38):
Not really. It was a but it was a big rock.
Hit her windshield. And so I called her and I was
like, hey, what the fuck? And she goes, Yep.
And I go, how big is it? She goes it's about 1/4 like a
the size of 1/4. That's a big fucking crack.
Yeah, 'cause that's going to spider web.
(32:01):
I hate my life. No, just.
Have her, What's the point anymore?
Have her cruise around on that and then get a ticket.
No have the glass just fly at her.
She wears glasses, she'll be fine.
I can't. I don't know what our deductible
is, but. Probably 1000 bucks.
(32:21):
Yeah, I need to go to Safelite and and see what I can't ours.
My windshield on the Mazda didn't cost that much.
So you were 50 bucks. Yeah.
Nice. Yeah, I fucking I punched it.
That's smart. It's a smart thing to do.
I didn't know I was going to break my windshield.
(32:45):
What other outcome I don't know.Did it just get what the fuck is
happening? I don't know Corvettes.
Are hello, hold on, hello, Hello, hello, wait, why is it
(33:11):
hello? Why is it doing that?
I don't know what's going on now.
Did we? We never did.
Are we coming through the speakers?
Are we coming through the speakers?
Why is it echoing so bad? It's fine.
(33:34):
Oh, it's like, really bad. Yeah.
So Spacey. Yeah, why?
OK, what are you my? The world's just gaslighting
you, Russell. This didn't happen.
None of this exists. All these problems that you're
having are fabricated and in your head.
(33:56):
Fuck it. And I'm in your head and stereo.
Tell me more. Tell me more.
How much did he spend? Tell me more.
Tell him. Oh, how much dough did he spend?
Yeah, so sorry. That was important, wasn't it?
Yep. Tell me more.
Tell me more. Could he?
Could she get me a friend? I got you got to love a Sonny.
(34:21):
He turned colder. That's where it ends.
So I told her we'd still be friends.
Then we made our true love vow, Huh?
(34:41):
Yeah, it's a little backwards. You would expect it to.
Somebody gave up. Yeah, in writing this and then.
Dude, stop. Stop touching.
Stuff. Hello this is bad.
Quit touching things, summon it.Is that better?
(35:08):
I fixed it. I fixed it.
I don't know how but I fixed it.You're going to ruin something
else. Though I'm going to ruin my
pants. Yeah.
Summer dreams ripped at the scene.
OK. Now pause.
That's definitely not a hymen reference.
(35:29):
No, it's a boner reference. Do you got another one of those?
Yeah. Can I have one?
Yeah. Where are they?
Right here. Oh, Jesus.
Help. I fixed it.
Nice. Fuck yeah.
(35:59):
Yeah, Grease is a fucked up movie.
Yeah, it's weird, but my favorite movie is the original
Romeo and Juliet. Because of the child porn dude.
Do you know the exact minute and2nd that it shows?
Up with the phone, we watched itin English class.
Did you destroy the tape on the VHS?
(36:21):
So at that spot. We watched it in English class
in 7th grade and. I'm imagining half the guys in
the bag. You were like, nice.
So I'm trying to remember how itwent.
(36:41):
So she, the teacher watches it every year with the students.
I'd get it. She's a guidance counselor now,
so. She's guidancing them toward a
life of sin, but she. Would hit the button on the
screen to like turn it off when that moment happens and then
(37:04):
turn it back on. But she hit the volume up button
instead. No, she turned off her monitor
on her computer on accident. I don't know how it happened.
I think what she was doing was like unplugging something, but
she unplugged like the VGA to her monitor instead of for the
thing. I don't know exactly how it
happened, but anyway, yeah, we're watching it and I think
(37:26):
maybe somebody was like, here itcomes, here it comes and it just
showed her tits. And we look back and she goes.
I turned off my screen and. Then one of the guys like as
they're leaving the, the class slips are like a 20.
Thanks, Teach. Yeah.
(37:47):
But yeah, that was crazy. Crazy awesome.
Yeah, 'cause I was in 7th grade,maybe.
See. That I feel like it's OK for
you. I feel like there is.
A yeah, child porn's OK if it's for you kids.
Yeah, yeah. Certainly rabbit child.
Porn, it's for kids, always was.Can't you?
(38:11):
Like legally, if you're like a 15 year old with a cell phone,
you take a picture of your penis, get charged with child
porn. Yeah, well.
Yeah, I think so. But what are they going to do?
Put you in prison with all of the rapists.
Don't be sending Dick pics. Maybe that's the move that the
(38:33):
the left is gonna make to try tolimit the amount of stuff out
there. I'm really trying to help to
save us. From ourselves making it legal
for kids to. Make it illegal and then also
start prosecuting to that extent.
The left is gonna do that. I.
Think so, yeah. Make it illegal for kids to
(38:55):
watch porn. No to the left.
Is gonna do that. Do that to themselves, yeah.
The left is going to make it illegal for kids.
To watch porn because it's like considered an aggression to send
a Dick pic to a woman. No, the left is going to go.
We need to make kids watch porn as part of their curriculum.
But only old man balls. Not young baby.
(39:15):
Boy, it's. Guy on guy only?
Yeah, that's what do you mean? The right is the people that's
making it illegal to watch porn if you don't have a license, if
you don't, if you don't, if you don't show that shifty Jew from
(39:37):
Canada your government ID, you cannot go on Pornhub.
Really. Yeah, in Texas and in Oklahoma,
I think, huh? Yeah.
You got to like register and like have your ID and everything
you never heard of. This I think I remember the
Texas one. Yeah, I don't know if it's here,
but yeah. That's fucking wild.
(40:00):
Well, it's stupid because what it's doing is just putting
people onto fringe websites thatdon't have that restriction.
I think that the unsolicited Dick pic stuff has a big left
problem though. That's.
That leftists send each other unsolicited Dick pics, Yes.
(40:23):
I feel like to protect victims. That guys that dress up as women
send children pictures of their penis.
Yes, I do believe that is a problem on the left.
You are right. That dudes keep raping children.
Yeah, that is a left problem. You're think so?
Yeah, I think that I think dudesraping children is a problem
(40:43):
that happens mostly on the left,other than in the Catholic
Church. Yeah.
Exactly, I was about to say. We don't consider them dudes
except for the Pope. Nice.
But yeah, yeah, no, yeah, Tricksis for kids.
(41:09):
And Dick pics. Is for kids as well.
There is an SD card floating around Wisconsin with a picture
of my penis on it. I don't know where it is.
Oh, someone's going to get burned hard.
I'm sure it's in my house and they're in my parents old house.
It's. Like in the baseboards, some,
(41:31):
like Renault companies are goingto.
I'm not going to say where, but I do have, I do there.
I there's a spot in the house where I think I know where it
is. I'm breaking into that house one
day. Just to burn the evidence?
No, because I got. So you could be.
In there possession of child porn no.
I got that's my penis and. Then you're like, you're in
court having to defend yourself.You stand up dramatically on the
(41:53):
fucking witness stand. You pulled out your pants.
I have a break mark on the tip of my penis so it's pretty easy
to match. And it just never grew.
It's still the same size your your lawyer's like I rest my
case, I do. Remember, because I took it on
this really shitty digital camera that I had gotten for my
birthday. And I do remember like looking
at it and being really disappointed because it was a it
(42:14):
was like really fat like like I wasn't really necessarily
disappointed than the length. Like I was like it could be
bigger, but I did my best to make it as big as possible,
right? But it was just real thick and I
wasn't super pleased about it. That's not a thing, that's a
problem. I know, I just didn't like the
(42:36):
look of it and it was a different colour than the rest
of my body. Like someone stacked extra.
Because I'm in my basement. I'm in my basement.
The walls are white and we have,like, those bright fluorescent
lights, you know? It's a dungeon down there, Yeah.
(42:58):
Where child porn is made. Exactly and so.
Like the show for a fish tank? Yeah, and there's a mirror on on
the wall and I and A treadmill in front of the mirror.
And then I'm standing, you know,behind the treadmill and looking
at the mirror and taking the picture and the way that the
(43:20):
treadmill 'cause it's like lengthwise this way like I'm
you're approaching. The side of.
It Yeah, yeah. So like where the where like the
console of the treadmill is likethat is like casting a shadow
and I'm pasty fucking white right.
And so all my Dick has a weird like green tint to it because of
(43:43):
the shadow because I'm already agrey human being and.
Everybody's doing a different colour on.
Everybody. Is that the name of your penis
is Bruce? No, it's Bruce Banner.
No, it's Larry Bird, because Larry Bird's nickname was the
legend. So the.
(44:08):
Oh yeah, so. Like got good ball control.
Because of like the shadow and everything.
Like there was like a green tintto my shaft and I was like why
is this happening to me? And you only had enough space
for like one more shot you couldn't risk.
It no. I got discouraged and I just
took the SD card out and hit it.I don't know why I kept it.
(44:29):
'Cause you kind of like the It'skind of good, yeah.
So yeah, I don't, you know, but yeah, that.
Dude, Can you imagine how terrifying it is to go purchase?
Like go to like a thrift store, like a Goodwill or something and
(44:49):
just purchase like an SD card. Yeah, dude, that's a dice roll.
Well, I mean like if you found it, would you turn it in or
would you burn it? I'd.
Shred it. I'd shred it and burn it.
(45:16):
I feel like you should. Turn dude, I'm about to turn you
in. I just.
Want to stop? That's on mine.
Dude. That's a baby.
I know. Stop.
But imagine being a 7th grader. In that context, it would be
sweet. So.
We're old men. So when this movie came out or
(45:40):
when this movie came out, this is from like the Sixties, 1968,
I thought the guy that played Romeo was Zac Efron.
And so I thought this was all happening like today, but like
back when I was in 7th grade. So I was like, I could find her.
I looked her up and she was like80.
(46:01):
EW. Died at 73.
Where does it say that? Her name is Hussey on the thing
you clicked. Oh yeah, Yep, Elizabeth Hussey.
And she really was 1. Yep, that's accurate.
It was such a like, the shot wascompletely pointless too.
(46:28):
Like the director was probably like just a pet.
Well, I guess all directors are.So yeah, the director is just a
pedophile because the scene is they are.
They had like, spent the night together and.
And then they wake up because the sun's, like, coming through
(46:48):
the window and it wakes them up and they're like, oh, shit.
And he's got to run, you know, before her parents see him.
And it's just a quick shot of her, like, turning over and you
just see one boob just flop over.
Yeah. And and so like, there was no
(47:09):
reason for her to be naked in this scene at all.
Yeah, I did not serve the movie.Yeah, whatsoever.
Super fucked up and the movie was like PG at the time.
Really. Yeah, you can catch some sloppy
tit PG. Yeah, we're like back.
In PG13 days like the Goonies I think they drop an F bomb.
(47:29):
Yeah, you can still drop F bombsin The Goonies or in PG13
movies, it just can't be in reference to actual fucking.
I've looked this up I. Think it's changed?
No, yeah, it's gotten. More shrimp on this, but so
yeah, that's what I'm saying. So you can say.
(47:52):
Because wasn't that like a big deal in The Wolverine and
Deadpool stuff? Like they can say the word now.
Yeah, because it's rated R, but it's not.
So it's, it's the context it which is set in and it also is
on a spectrum it it goes to a board of people and they watch
the movie and they give it a rating based on it as a whole.
(48:17):
So what directors do is they'll aim for a rating, but.
And when they don't even try, itjust goes.
R Well, they yes, well, I kinda,yeah.
But the studio that's paying forit would have a fit if.
Yeah, it's at a certain point you'll you'll have to cut stuff
out and that's where you'll get an unrated cut.
(48:39):
Oh so. The director's cut the the copy
to. Of the.
The director's circumcision, which is really just an unrated
cut, is really just the. Original movie as filmed.
No, it's just a fake rated R stamp.
It's just a stamp. It's just rated R and they just
(49:02):
stamp it on there for advertising.
Because in reality, if it's in aplastic clamshell box, there's
no real rape in it. It's all fake rape.
You have to watch like movies that you find online to find
like like you have to. Go to Goodwill and then start
grabbing. Yeah, you have to go to Goodwill
and follow somebody into the changing room.
(49:26):
Yeah, like that unrated is just for advertising, but the way
that it has kind of always been,and it's gotten a little like
through the age has gotten stricter and lenient like in
different places. But for the most part, you can't
say shit in rated PG13 movies ifyou're describing excrement.
(49:49):
But you can say it if you're saying oh shit.
But if you say it a whole bunch of times, that's going to push
your rating to R And the same thing with fuck.
You can say oh fuck, are you fucking kidding me?
But you can't say let's fuck. It just is completely about
(50:09):
context. Like that is kind of how they
rate stuff and then tits are offlimits and then pussy is just
completely off limits. But we can see penis.
Because they're funny. I guess.
I don't think anyone's ever seriously said that's a handsome
penis. I think everyone just laughs
(50:32):
because again, penises are just funny.
Yeah, I don't. I've never seen a handsome
penis. I always got him first of all,
my pastor said I have a very handsome penis.
Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen a handsome penis.
I've seen some pretty ugly penises, like that one from Hall
(50:56):
Pass. Yep, that one's crazy.
It's really, really upsetting for your manager to talk to me
about that movie. Yeah, he's brought it up.
Three other times yesterday he was quoting Blazing Saddles in
my meeting where he was telling me that he is not writing me up
(51:17):
for something. He's at the end of it.
We were talking shop about the movie Blazing Saddles.
He goes where are all the white women at?
And then there's that scene fromAirplane.
It's my favorite scene that I'veseen.
I haven't seen the movie, but I keep seeing this clip.
(51:40):
I really need to watch this movie.
Can you say scene one more time?Scene.
Thank you. Sorry, Skein.
Not as satisfying. Where it's the two black guys
and the stewardess comes up to talk to him and she can't
understand him. And this old lady comes up
behind and she goes, it's OK, I got it.
I speak jive. Oh yeah.
(52:04):
Yeah, I remember that. I love that.
That movie is so packed with jokes constantly.
Yeah, dude, have you ever had Cajun cheese Nuggets or cheese
(52:25):
curds? They're the same.
Thing you mean, have I ever fucked a southern French white
man? Is that what you're saying?
Yeah. No, he's like French.
Yeah. What are you talking about?
Cheese Nuggets? What the fuck is that?
(52:46):
It's a cheese curd. OK, that's a cheese curd.
Yeah, which is a nugget of cheese.
No, Yeah, no, a curd is a specific material.
Yeah, you can have a curd nugget, I guess, but a cheese
nugget and a cheese curd would be very different things.
(53:06):
A nugget is the form, the shape,something is taking.
Yeah, a curd is a physical specimen.
Of cheese. Why are you here?
And they call. You here just to hurt me.
Everyone else has and I'm just jumping on the bandwagon.
It feels good to be on the winning side for once.
(53:28):
You're. Doing that laughing and it makes
you really uncomfortable becauseyou did this earlier today when
I like opened the door just out of your.
Eyesight. It was terrifying.
There was that specific laugh. There's like a weird wheezing
thing where you just didn't inhale for the longest.
You don't have lung capacity to just exhale for as long as you
did. I have better lung capacity than
(53:49):
my dad does. Hey, it's not funny.
I almost died. The man's drowning standing up.
Yeah, that was weird. My wife got some and I'm looking
(54:09):
forward to that. Cheese curds?
Yeah. I was just wondering if putting
Cajun spices on them is a bastardization of cheese.
In your Wisconsin sensibilities,no.
Because if that would be then then deep frying cheese curds
would be a bastardization and I'd never blasphemy the holy
(54:33):
Culver's. Praise be, yeah.
I ate 14 taquitos between when Iclocked out and when I came.
Here are. You talking like tornado sized
or like the smaller? No, they fucking.
(54:53):
I go to the. I went to Casey's and they had
like 2 boxes of 15 taquitos and.Like microwave ones or?
Yeah, like the OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you now.
Yeah. And.
You drop 1. I did drop one on my way out the
door earlier, but no, I threw itout 'cause there's poop on that
(55:16):
floor. Why'd you poop poop on the?
Floor. It wasn't me, it was the demon
Chihuahua with no team. It's not a Chihuahua if it
doesn't have teeth, it's a gum wall.
It's a diarrhoea Wawa. Actually, that thing doesn't
even sit to shit. He's just pre lupinous.
(55:37):
Yeah, she's just. So when death fucks, it's just.
Goobbering out of her. I didn't.
I don't. That's the only way.
That's the only that's the only verb that I have is goobbering.
That's yeah, she goobers her shit out of her ass.
Does the owner like keep this dog around as a portable pocket
pussy or something that'll that's the only thing that
(55:57):
explains is things existence? They found her outside of like a
Home Depot. And didn't leave it.
Yeah. They resuscitated roadkill,
Yeah. It was just a Maria was just a
migrant Chihuahua looking for a job and they just they kidnapped
her. I should fucking call ICE
(56:20):
actually. Yeah, no, they found her like
outside of a Home Depot or something like 20 years ago.
That would be a really funny joke.
If they probably wouldn't shoot them, shoot the.
Dogs, I see. Yeah.
But but yeah, it's old. It's old.
(56:43):
It only farts in liquid. I just imagine trying to bark.
At the door then I don't know. I don't know if like this shit
has like isopropyl alcohol in itbut it dries so fast.
It's all solvents. Yeah, it's it like immediately
(57:05):
evaporates and so it like adheres to the carpet
immediately. It's disgusting.
Do you smell smoke? Did you fart?
I mean, it's 4th of July. Yeah, but it smells like
cigarette smoke. Probably there's like 1-2 three
(57:28):
holes on that wall. That's true, yeah.
Yeah, I definitely smell it. Yeah.
OK, I just don't want him to think it was us.
But anyway. It won't matter if it was.
What's he going to do, fire me? I want to quit anyway.
(57:51):
Yeah, that dog is. It happened again.
Yeah. Let me see if I can fix it.
Hello. Yeah.
Why? Hello?
Why? Whatever What?
(58:20):
Good. I pay into this.
You just saved me a bill. Enjoy.
Yeah. Jesus.
Christ. Well, that wasn't good.
(58:42):
Russell, quit rusting it. That is awful.
Did I fix it? I think I fixed it.
I mean, I didn't fix it. We.
Just don't hear ourselves. So I guess that is.
A Wait, you don't hear yourself?No.
Oh damn it, how about now? Yeah.
(59:03):
Are you hearing it now, Mr. Krebs?
Nope. Seriously.
Yeah, not hearing it. It's like up very high.
Well, I'm sorry. They're up now.
It's gone, I hear. Yep, there we.
Go shit that was this is going to be unusable.
I'm going to check our with our receptionist to make sure that
(59:27):
we're not on fire the. Truck just left.
What truck? Oh, OK.
He vapes, he should not be smoking.
He does both. This is America doesn't.
Fucking feel like it does it. I don't know people are saving
$200 out there. No, they're not.
(59:52):
What is the most inconvenient place that you peed your pants?
In my bed yesterday. No, right now I was wearing
footy pyjamas. I was too old.
That is super unfortunate. I was too old to be wearing
footy pyjamas, but like so I wasyoung, but I was old enough to
(01:00:18):
not piss my pants and I did do it on purpose.
I really had to pee Where at my grandma's house up in Wisconsin
for Christmas. I don't know what part in the
Christmas vacation that we were that this was it could have been
right before right after, but itwas during Christmas vacation.
We usually spend the whole week or week and a half there and I
(01:00:42):
just, I'm laying in bed and I'm just too lazy to get up and I
got to pee. I'm wearing footy pajamas and so
I just pee and then I get up to go tell my mom I peed my pants.
(01:01:10):
It really did not work out in mypaper.
Russell, you have college tours tomorrow.
What are you doing? Yeah, you need to be in bed
asleep. Why is it doing this?
(01:01:31):
Oh man. Why?
I just lost the entire right half of my hearing.
Really. Yeah, good.
How about now? Still shitty.
Well, you know what? Up, up.
I'm literally just touching. I'm touching nothing now.
I'm hearing. About now, Yep.
(01:01:55):
Yep, Yep, it's almost back. There it is.
Are you serious? Yes, quit touching shit.
I literally did this. Russell, it's gone, now it's
back. Quit farting at the board.
Fired pot shots. What is happening?
Now we have to gut the board, clean it and throw it back
(01:02:17):
together. I'm going to gut.
I just, I don't want to be here anymore.
Can we go? Yeah, we can call it.
I haven't ever pissed my pants ever.
I'm going to have that on record.
You pissed your pants this morning.
You swore. Yeah, I called you a faggot.
(01:02:40):
You're right. All right.
Love you guys. Bye.
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