August 8, 2025 • 60 mins
Welcome to Chronically The Sickest - the sickest podcast you know.
On today’s episode I’m joined by dopamine dressing queen, Saffy.
We get into the new DSM-5, comorbid neurodivergence and what it means to walk a mile in someone's shoes.
Find Saffy on Instagram @neuroparklysaffy
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:04):
Hello folks, and welcome to Chronically the Sickest, the
podcast where we talk about all things that make us chronically
the sickest people we know. I'm Clark, your host.
It's nice to chat with you this week.
Join us as we dive into the episode, sit back, relax, and
enjoy the show. Hello SAF, and welcome back to
(00:34):
Chronically the Sickest. This episode will almost
certainly be out before your main episode, but technically
welcome back. Hi, thank you for having me on
again Clock. I had a lot of fun last time,
which yes will be actually next time.
So I'm really excited to be backand just be able to chat about
(00:55):
some. Controversial topics, yes I
know. I feel like you are actually the
perfect person to do this episode with just because on
your main app we talked about the fact that you were diagnosed
with both ADHD and autism later in life, which same here.
So I think this will be a very fun episode.
(01:18):
I think so too. Should be good.
Our experiences might be a little bit different with this
topic because I'm in the US and you're in Australia.
So the big kind of question of this episode or the topic, the
inflammatory controversial topicis, is ADHD in autism?
(01:38):
All these late diagnosis, are they like, are they real?
Is this just a trend? Is this just the kids want
something to be wrong with them?I would really like to discuss
that because, I mean, you were diagnosed later in life.
And as a lot of people in this community know, like autism is a
(02:00):
disabling condition. Like that's literally part of
the diagnostic criteria is that it has to affect you negatively.
And so I would love to hear maybe a little bit about your
diagnosis process and what you think about this idea that late
diagnosed Audi HD is a trend? Yeah, well for me for diagnosis,
(02:27):
I was diagnosed with ADHD 1st and that's like a rocky story
because I was diagnosed by multiple psychologists about 3
years ago. So I would have been, I think I
was like 19 when it when psychologist first my personal
psychologist brought it up as a suggestion and then I got
(02:50):
officially diagnosed by an ADHD psychologist.
But then in Australia, the process like a psychologist's
diagnosis is valid, but if you ever want to try medication for
ADHD, you have to have a psychiatrist diagnosis.
So I actually only got that about a year ago.
I did first try to see a psychologist one time and it
(03:15):
really didn't go down well and ended quite badly.
And it took me about a year and a half to want to try that again
and see another psychiatrist. And then that second time was
when I got the diagnosis and wasable to stop medication.
So it's like confusing because Iwas diagnosed 3 years ago, but
you kind of also diagnosed one year ago.
(03:36):
I'm like, I don't know, take it as you want.
Well that means you're like EE triple E diagnosed with ADHD.
So if anyone wants to fight you on it, you can be like, no, I
really have it. Yes, multiple people can give
you the stance. And then with autism, I was
diagnosed in April this year, sothat was quite new.
(04:00):
But I feel like because I'd already learned so much through
the ADHD diagnosis and like getting pulled into the
neurodivergent community that way, that it felt less jarring.
Like I, I already knew a bit about autism and you're a
divergent. So it's like, you know, easier
to accept the second diagnosis than the first, I feel.
(04:21):
Yeah, that like transitional period where you're like, Oh my
gosh, everything in my life could be explained by this
diagnosis and then. Yeah, the big thing is you think
like you have this personality and then you get diagnosed and
you're like, I don't have a personality, I have a diagnosis.
Like everything I thought was me, it's just ADHD and autism.
(04:44):
It's like, oh, I'm not unique. Like I thought, I'm like in this
group of everyone else that's sosimilar.
Oh my gosh, that is wow. I feel a little called out
because that's exactly how I felt.
I was like, Oh my gosh, no, I I don't have a personality.
That's cool. It's just all my quirks.
(05:05):
They were a neurosis. Yes, but I feel like this is
such a good topic to chat about because I was thinking about it
the other day and I posted a reel on Instagram and then I
reposted it the same reel onto YouTube Shorts.
(05:26):
And what it was, is it was basically just like me doing
sort of like skit thing talking about how even before you're
diagnosed and even if you were to never receive that diagnosis,
if you're autistic, you're always autistic.
Like so it's like what we were saying before, I think we
(05:47):
weren't recording yet, but what we were basically saying is that
like the diagnosis just says what you are, but you've always
been autistic or had ADHD beforethat point.
And after that point, it doesn't, the diagnosis doesn't
mean you suddenly get whatever it is.
It's just giving you knowledge about yourself and how you've
always been. And so I did a little reel on
(06:10):
that basically saying like, you know, even like even if I were
never diagnosed with autism, I would still actually be
autistic. I just wouldn't know and no one
else would maybe not know. Like they wouldn't know either.
And so on Instagram like that was fine.
But then it when I put it onto YouTube it blew up but on the
wrong side of the. Internet, I knew that where it
(06:32):
was going. Yeah, so I ended up like just
stopping looking and replying tocomments because I was like, I
can't, I can't be bothered at this stage.
But it was just all these peoplelike, yeah, but you can't just
decide you're autistic and and all this stuff.
And they all ended up talking about like self diagnosis in the
comments and stuff, which was like, not really what I've been
(06:54):
talking about anyway. And it's a whole different
topic. And I was like a couple of
comments. I was like, I have a diagnosis.
I'm just saying that like, it just proves that something has
always existed. Doesn't make the thing exist.
But I ended up just stopping to reply because I was like, I
(07:15):
can't deal. Like all these people who just
did, they don't care to, like, listen to other opinions.
But yeah, it was kind of interesting.
And it wasn't like it was OK because it didn't feel like a
personal attack. Like I was able to handle it OK.
But it was really weird having it blow up on, like, the other
(07:35):
side of the Internet when I'm soused to, you know, when you're
in your own, like, comfortable community bubble on social
media, you see people that are like you and you all sort of
connect and it feels really niceand positive.
And it's just occasionally when you post something and instead
of going to that like little community, you have it like pops
to some other random opposite community and you're like, Oh
(07:58):
no, so. Yeah, the Internet, I think, is
very weird right now because we are so used to being in our own
bubbles where you're like, everyone agrees with me and
everyone knows exactly what I'm going through.
And then you forget that like there are people who believe
completely the opposite of you. Yeah.
And I mean, that's also, like, not a good thing.
(08:21):
You know, it's not always good to just be surrounded by yes men
and everyone who agrees with youand just says yes to everything.
Like it is, yeah, it's not goingto help you learn or grow in
your opinions. But then I feel like sometimes
the Internet is so, like, one thing or the other, you know,
(08:42):
Like, I feel like my posts either go to everyone who's like
me or they just fly off and go to everyone who's the exact
opposite. It's like, it's like, where's
the middle ground? Like, I feel like we need that
more. Yeah, there's a lot of echo
chambering on the Internet. Yes, no, I think I tried to film
(09:02):
a real where I was like trying to explain the like feeling of
like, why can't? Why can't we have a nuanced
opinion? Like why isn't there like a
middle of like, yes, I do believe this thing, but also
let's talk about this. And it just every time I tried
to film it, I was like, this isn't going to go well.
Speaking on this exact topic is exactly what's going to happen.
(09:25):
OK, first of all, so sorry that your real got on or your YouTube
short got on the wrong side of the Internet.
That's always annoying. But I am glad that you're
handling it well. Thanks.
Also, totally unrelated, but I really like your cute little
dinosaur earrings. I've been like distracted by
them this whole time and like checking them out.
(09:48):
They're very cute. They're I think they're from
Amazon, but thank you. No, I love them.
They're like my favorite. I just have like 17 pairs and
whenever I can't figure out an earring to put with my outfit,
I'm just like, oh, good thing I have lots of color versions of
dinosaurs. But thank you.
(10:11):
OK, So now that you kind of talked a little bit about like
your experience as someone with Audi HD as is the shortened
condensed version of autistic and ADHD, how do you feel like
the response has been to having a diagnosis late in life?
(10:33):
Like what? What has that been like for you?
It's really interesting. I think people have been less
surprised by my autism diagnosisthan they have by my ADHDI think
I kind of kept the ADHD diagnosis, like mostly private.
I didn't like go about sharing it, but I also didn't keep it a
(10:54):
secret. I was just like sort of in
between about it. But often I think when I
mentioned it to people offhandedly, they'd be like, oh,
really? I'm like a little bit surprised,
like people I know in my life. But once I got the autism
diagnosis, I was actually like really happy about that one and
(11:16):
really wanted to celebrate it. Not that I wasn't happy about
ADHD, it's just that I was goingthrough so many struggles at the
time when I got my autism diagnosis.
So I was like, OK, thank you forlike validating everything, like
right when I needed it. And so I was like, you know
what, I'm just going to do an Instagram post on my public and
(11:38):
my private account and I'm goingto put it on my Facebook account
so all like my old relatives cansee it too.
I was like, I'm just going to say hello, guys, I got this
diagnosis. Bye.
And that's pretty much what I did.
I just did a post. I was like, hey, guess what?
I got this diagnosis today. And then that was like the whole
of the post. But yeah, it felt.
(12:03):
Like. People have been less surprised
about that and a lot of people have been very supportive.
Both not that like people that Idon't know in real life, but
also my family, I feel like they've been better about it.
I don't know since I maybe because I just did it in a big
post and they didn't find out about it individually.
(12:25):
You know, like if everyone's leaving positive comments, you
can't learn very well posts saying like I don't support you
or something. So works easier that way.
But yeah, I've been very fortunate to, I feel like have a
generally good response across the board.
But I know it's not like that for a lot of people.
(12:46):
And I think there are a lot of people who aren't also who give
the opinion that adult diagnosisor a trend and all that.
They aren't necessarily saying it personally, like picking out
people, but they're just saying it.
There's a lot like just general,like just say like, oh, it's
ridiculous, all these people, all these, and it's kind of just
(13:07):
referencing the community as a whole rather than pinpointing
someone. I think you make a really good
point that people individually can be like, of course, like, I
support you. I'm so glad that you got this
diagnosis and like great and like being positive, but making
those comments about the whole of the late diagnosis community
(13:32):
and. It's like people would never
that be like, oh, I'd never likeattack you like I know you like
you're the. Exception in their mind.
What you Yeah. And so when they make those big
statements in their mind or not even, but they just think like
they're excluding you, like you're not part of that sweeping
(13:53):
statement they're making. And I think that's across the
board with so much, you know, like people like, you could
literally put that to anything. Like I think that happens
probably a lot with homophobic stuff as well.
It's like, yes, but I like love and accept you.
But I'm going to make this grandsweeping statement about like
(14:13):
everyone who's gay, but it doesn't mean you.
And I think that happens probably in every like
marginalized group you'd find some sort of equivalent.
Yes, people love to have like a sense of everyone thinks that
they're a good person, you know,And so it would contradict their
(14:37):
like the version of themselves that they see if they were to be
like, no, your diagnosis isn't valid.
This is a trend. I really think you need to fix
your neurodivergence. So instead they make sweeping
statements to everyone else, butthey go, no, but like you, I
love you and you go wait. It's like, so do you believe
(14:59):
what you just said and put out into the ether into the public,
or do you believe what you just said to me?
Because they're contradicting statements and they're like, for
me, I have family members that are like, it's so great that
like you got this diagnosis and I'm like really proud of you.
And like you're speaking out online.
(15:20):
And then they post things on social media that are like, you
know, people who shall not be named in the government with
three letter acronym names in the US government are like
saying that we need to fix autism and that autism is called
Best Buy vaccines. And they like to post all about
that. And then they're like, but
you're fine. Like, thanks, friend.
(15:43):
I. It is weirdly jarring.
Is it so I wanna ask, 'cause you're in Australia, is it the
same over there? Like, is autism derogatory over
there? Like, is that something that
they're trying to fix? Quote UN quote?
(16:05):
So it's hard to know exactly because I haven't lived as an
autistic person anywhere else. But we One thing I really like
is our political system is less black and white and people
(16:27):
aren't as ruled by their political beliefs.
Like often times you can have lots of friends and family and
you won't even know who they would vote for.
It's just not something that's really discussed.
It's like sort of private and itdoesn't like govern every
decision you make, I suppose. So that is helpful.
(16:51):
And I feel like our government has a lot less control in, in
stuff like that. It has to pass through a lot of
levels for something to happen and change to be made.
So I feel like that can be very helpful.
But like definitely socially there is still the thing of
(17:12):
people like that do use autisticas an insult.
Like if someone's, I don't know,just doing something odd or
being silly or whatever, they'llbe like, oh, you're so autistic
or something like that as an insult.
And I definitely have heard thatoften.
But yes, so like at that level, like the social community level,
(17:36):
it's definitely a problem. And they would still behave as
some people in Australia who believe that vaccines cause
autism and whatnot, like, you know, but I do feel like they
have less power over our policies and such.
(17:57):
Wow, that is fascinating. That sounds the political part
sounds delightful. Sorry.
The other stuff obviously not, but OK.
I just want to talk to whoever started spreading the rumor that
vaccines cause autism. I just want to talk to them
because they got around to a lotof countries real fast.
It's such a yeah, ridiculous because it was like one study
(18:22):
and it wasn't well done and likeit was really bad because just
because something's in the studydoesn't mean you should take it
at face value. You need to look at like the
significance of it, like the P value and all that.
Like there's so much stuff. How many people were in the
study, how long the follow up, what they tested, yada yada.
(18:43):
Like you can't just because it'swritten in a study be like, Oh
yeah, I mean, it's good. Like that would be nice, but
that's not the reality. And because there was one really
bad study done on vaccines and autism, it's like created this.
And so many people have created good quality studies that have
(19:03):
disproved this. But because of this one study
and it getting into the media and all sorts, you just end up
with all these people who still stick by it even though it was
poorly done. Yeah, like it was disproven.
Sorry. OK, I was, I was, you were
(19:24):
saying that and I was like, whatstudy is it?
Because I know that it's from a while ago and I have like, OK,
it's wow. It's a study from the 1990s and
it has since been retracted. So it's like.
Yeah. That's just crazy that like, all
of this 30 years later, I'm bad at math 35, whatever.
(19:46):
Yeah, it's like it has such a grip over society to be like
vaccines cause autism and autismis bad and we want to fix it,
when in reality, yes, it's a disabling condition, but at the
same time, it's not the worst thing that could happen to you.
(20:10):
You could have measles. Yeah, no.
And it is so linked to your personality.
But it's odd because yeah, you could like if you could
theoretically take the autism orADHD or whatever out of someone,
you'd be taking away a lot of disabling aspects of their life
(20:31):
for sure. But you'd also be taking like
their whole personality. So they'd just be like a nothing
like like you wouldn't have anything that makes you, you.
So it's kind of hard because they are so joined.
So it's like, why would you wantto get rid of it if that was
even a thing? Like, surely you don't want the
(20:51):
people you love to just be like shells of people?
Wow, what a way to put that 'cause I mean, we started off
this episode being like, gettingthe diagnosis later in life is
like, Oh my gosh, all of my personality was actually
neurodivergent. But then on the flip side of
that, if you take away the neurodivergent, you take away
(21:13):
the person. Yeah.
Well, I hope the listeners are gonna have the same revelations
I'm having 'cause it is. I mean, you get this.
I mean, you kind of said that you had it more with your ADHD
diagnosis, 'cause that one kind of a little more drawn out.
But like getting the diagnosis, you really have to grapple with
(21:33):
like every moment of your life up until the diagnosis and look
back on it and be like, whoa, I was this thing.
Yeah, the amount of like reflecting you do is insane.
So like it depends what situation, like whether it's
(21:54):
leading, knowing you're going for an assessment and like
leading up to that. Or it could be like once you've
got the diagnosis and then you're like once you've got it,
you're like, Oh my gosh, reflecting on all of this.
And, and it's also like it's twoparts because it's reflecting
like seeing your personality in the diagnostic criteria, but
(22:15):
it's also things like grieving and like looking back and being
like, would this bad thing have happened if I'd known and got in
support or this bad thing or this bad thing and like it.
It's insane the amount of thinking you do about your
diagnosis once you receive it. There is always the idea of when
(22:37):
you get your diagnosis late, you're like, what would it have
been like if I'd gotten it earlier?
But then you speak to people whohave gotten it earlier and
they're like, it's not the same as right now.
People would call you slurs and you would be stuck in a
classroom where they didn't let you speak.
And like it wasn't this like utopian experience even though.
(23:01):
Like you said, you have to like you, you think, oh, I wish I'd
had that. I wish I'd had that.
And then all these people who did have it and they're like,
this is how bad it was. And then like, I don't know if
they wish for the opposite or not, but like it's so lose lose
because the grass really is not greener on the other side at
(23:24):
all. You just think it is.
And like, maybe you would have been lucky and gotten all of the
help and support you needed, butlikely you would not have is the
unfortunate reality. People are gonna hate to hear
that one. Yeah, no, the grass is not
always greener. Oh I would really like to ask
(23:45):
someone who was diagnosed earlier if they have the same
question of like. Feel like you should do an
episode of comparing like like diagnosed person versus early
diagnosed person and comparing childhood and growing up
(24:06):
experiences and stuff. OK, yes, but there's also people
that I found out through, you know, the deep dive you do on
the Internet after being diagnosed, as we all do.
I assume is there are people whowere diagnosed when they were
younger, their parents never told them and they got
(24:26):
rediagnosed as an adult. And that not just that fuck that
would fuck me up. I would trust no one ever for
the rest of my life. I'd be so I'm I'd be more angry
with my parents then than if I than I was now.
Yeah, I know that. Yeah.
Sorry. That was I'm sorry.
Would be insane. I don't know.
'Cause that's worse. You're like, I really could have
(24:47):
had a different experience than I did growing up, feeling like
growing up neurodivergent, not knowing you're a neurodivergent.
Like people use all these different words for it, but it's
like you feel broken. You feel like there's something
wrong with you and you feel likelife takes way more energy for
(25:08):
you than everyone else. And you just assume that that's
just how it is and everyone elseis powering through it.
And in reality, they're not. I've seen people compare it to,
you know, you get, you either get the diagnosis, like the
label of autism autistic, or youget the label of weird, odd,
stupid, silly, quirky, all sortsof like other labels that you'd
(25:32):
rather not have. Perhaps if you'd just been given
that one label, it's like, oh, that's way easier.
Like at least you know something.
It's a neutral term rather than potentially getting awful terms
given to you. Yeah, OK.
I really like that you just called autism a neutral term,
(25:53):
because it is and. Wow.
I forget sometimes that labels don't have to a define you and
they don't have to mean anythingother than oh this is my life
experience. Yeah, and I mean, it's hard
because so much with like the term autism especially, I feel
(26:16):
like it's a constant. Like there there's a camp of
people who are like, it's a superpower and then they can't
have people who are like, it's bad.
It's like this terrible thing that takes away someone's life
and whatever. But it doesn't have to be
either. You're allowed.
It's neutral and you're allowed to acknowledge.
These are the parts I like aboutit and being autistic.
(26:37):
And this is what I hate about it.
This is what I wish was different.
It's like anything else, you know, you can say like my brown
hair is neutral. You know, some days I might be
like, I love my hair, woo Hoo, and other days I hate it.
But it's like it's nearly good nor bad.
And it's the exact same way withneurodivergence.
(26:58):
It just is and. Good analogy.
I'm just thinking in in the linear.
What is that? Yeah, adjacent.
Sorry. It was like the lines and
they're parallel. God, can you tell I failed math?
Adjacent to your brunette analogy is the like people think
(27:24):
blondes have more fun and when you go blonde, people like it
more and you get more attention and people think that it's silly
when you're a little bit dumb versus if you're dumb and
brunette, people just call you dumb and brunette and that's the
exact same thing. I'm sorry, my brain was like,
yes, this is a good one. I like this.
(27:46):
OK, sorry, I wow, can you tell that I am never divergent?
OK, I feel like this is a littlebit been in all over the place
episode, but I'm kind of liking it.
I personally am having a lot of.Yeah, I feel like we're just
going down lots of tangents and it's great.
This is what happens when we don't have a like line by line.
(28:11):
How we're going to do an episodeis.
But I like it. Well, the listeners.
Malarkey. We could have gone on a tangent
about here for like ages or, or dinosaur earrings or something.
So at least the tangents we've been going on are somewhat
related, you know? They are.
And I'm assuming the people who are gonna be listening to this
(28:31):
are like, Oh yes, you know, they're here for this.
And I think honestly, they'd be here for the weird hair
conversation or the earring conversation as well.
But I'm just like sitting here and you're like saying something
and I'm like flabbergasted. I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is
crazy. And I'm like, people are gonna
love this. So I'm just like, yes, we've
(28:52):
gone off on so many tangents, but I feel like they've all
been, yeah, kind of related to what we're talking about.
Yeah, to bring my. OK, I was gonna say I was like,
what are you grabbing? Hello.
I know I'm actually a little bitsad that mine hasn't come out.
The I feel like, wow, yeah, thisis gonna be such a weird
episode. But the like question of like
(29:19):
why do you think that people find late diagnosis to be like
invalid? Like what do you think the
reason is like? I would love to hear your
opinion on potsies. Listen up.
We both know that precinctopy sucks.
Fainting to passing out when you're alone though, that is 2
(29:44):
thumbs down. It's so nerve wracking.
Like what if I pass out and hit my head or I start getting dizzy
while I'm driving? Am I gonna be safe or just in
general am I going to be safe asa disabled woman?
That anxiety, that is what gets you.
But I don't have that anymore. Well, I do have anxiety.
(30:07):
I am an OCD girlie but not aboutpassing out or my safety because
I just click my invisi wear necklace and both my family and
emergency personnel are alerted.The dizzies are scary no matter
how many times it happens, but knowing that I have a backup
plan is what makes me feel a little bit better, so maybe
(30:29):
that'll help you too. Using code sickest for 10% off
on your invisible wear purchase at the link in your description
is an option. Sending you salty vibes.
Okie dokie. Anyway.
I think a lot of it is just theyobviously you can't, but they
(30:50):
don't see inside our heads, in our minds and outwardly they
might just think, Oh well, like I've known you since however
long, like you seem fine, you'vedone this and this and this and
like whatever else. But they don't see all the other
struggles. And especially if you're, I
mean, a lot of late diagnosed people, which is probably it's a
(31:14):
factor that makes them less targeted for diagnosis early on
is but having internally presenting symptoms of ADHD and
or autism, whichever it is. And I think that's what's hard
is like, I know with my ADHDA, lot of it is internally
(31:34):
presenting like I, I'm combination and I definitely
have outward stuff, but and a lot of learnt to like hide and
work around so hard. And so yes, everyone sees that I
arrived to events on time and myroom is very organized and
whatnot, but they don't see all the extra energy that goes into
(31:57):
like me setting a million alarmsto help me get out of bed.
And then alarms tell me to leavethe house and to remember my
phone and remember this and remember that.
And they don't see that, yes, myroom is spotless, but I have to
as soon as I use something, it has to go in exactly the right
spot. That's specifically for that.
Or else if it like if I don't dothat, I'm going to end up with
(32:19):
like doom piles everywhere. And so it's just people aren't
seeing the behind the scenes. And so it's easy to look at
someone and be like, you seem fine to me if you're not saying
into their mind or all the extraeffort they have to go to just
to achieve the same thing. Yeah.
So what is that saying that people say you want to walk a
(32:41):
mile in someone else's shoes? So maybe people just aren't
doing that when they think of late diagnosed neurodivergence.
They're just not thinking. This is very literal, but on the
bright side, I'm wearing some really comfy slippers right now,
so if someone wanted to walk a mile on my shoes right now I
feel like that'd be pretty comfy.
(33:02):
I'm sorry. Wow.
Yeah, I'm sorry. My first thought was way to take
that literally. That feels on brand, Yes.
I mean, I'm barefoot right now, so I don't.
I feel like I'm barefoot most ofthe time, so if I wanted to walk
(33:22):
a mile in my shoes, honestly it wouldn't be a good time.
It depends where the mile is. If like a mile of carpet that
would be fine. That'd be good.
I like that thing. I feel like that's not a thing
anymore. Well, I'm thinking of like a red
carpet. I don't know if there's a mile
long red carpet, but there's like long ones, you know, like
(33:43):
award shows and stuff like that.True, true.
OK, guys, we. Just gotta get famous because
obviously like, I mean, we kind of use the same, but we don't
often say that saying in Australia with mile, just
because we don't use miles, kilometers.
Yeah, right. Well, you just say like you have
to walk in someone else's shoes.So we just don't use the
(34:05):
measurement I bet. America is the one that's like,
yeah, no, let's specify I. Think kilometers are better
because if you go for a run or awalk and you can go the same
distance and you can be like sappy, I went for a one one mile
walk and I can be like well yeah, I went for almost 2K2
(34:28):
kilometer walk and so I look more impressive do the same
walk. Yeah, so.
Well also every other country uses the metric system, so that
also might make one more sense. But no for sure, Lord over me
the fact that you can go on A to2 kilometer run, my brain was
(34:54):
like kilometer does not sound like a real word but it is.
Wow OK thank you for sharing what you think because I think
the whole point of these episodes is that they are
opinion pieces. Like it isn't.
Obviously our opinions are basedon our own experiences and like
(35:19):
you're talking from your own experience, but it is just kind
of like fascinating to be like, oh, this is what I think on a
topic. Talk to someone else and go Oh
my gosh, I didn't know you felt that way.
Yeah, and that's what I find so good about.
Like that's what I really enjoy about Instagram say is I'll make
sure I follow people who are part of the neurodivergent
(35:43):
community. Often for me, autistic people
that have very different experiences than me or opinions.
And sometimes I'll watch a videoand I'll like really disagree
with it, but I'm like, that's good.
I need to keep following this person so I can keep having
these different opinions and like coming at me and I can try
(36:08):
and see it from a different way.And it just, it either
strengthens your opinion or changes it in another way, which
is also very good sometimes too.But yeah, I love that about
social media because, I mean, I barely know any autistic people
in real life, let alone autisticpeople who are very different to
me. So at least through social
(36:30):
media, I see, you know, autisticpeople of color and autistic
people in different countries all around the world in
different like socioeconomic statuses or people with higher
support needs, all sorts of likeso many different opinions and
(36:51):
like experiences. And so it's a really good place
to just like try and, you know, seek out other.
People's opinions and experiences, too.
Yeah, I mean, that's exactly what we were talking about
before with like, the echo chamber.
It's good to have access to all these different opinions and
experiences. And also, yeah, you don't have
(37:15):
to leave a hate comment if you don't agree with what someone
did. But yeah, weirdly you can just
like scroll past. Yeah, but like, social media is
built to keep you there longer. And so if they know that you're
going to watch it and rewatch itwhile you're typing, you're like
and you suck and they'll keep showing you those videos and
(37:36):
therefore you will keep doing itanyway.
OK sorry that's a different tangent.
Would love to do a topical episode on social media because
I don't think kids should have access.
Yeah, neither. But on the topic of like hate
comments, I had a a person comment on one of my videos and
it was like, I think I was talking about my travel
(37:58):
experience, but it was like having a dynamic disability.
And then, yeah, he basically like left this con accusing me
and being like, so how come you're going to skating
competition, but you can't even walk around the airport and all
this stuff. And so I was like, you know
what? I'm going to like kill him with
kindness. And I responded and I was like,
hello, thanks for your comment. I hope you're going well.
(38:19):
And I was like telling him like,this is a great opportunity to
educate yourself. I suggest you look up dynamic
disabilities online. Thank you so much for being
interested in educating yourselfabout disabilities and the
disabled community. Like all this stuff.
And then he replied. Like correcting me about
(38:46):
something to do with dynamic disabilities was just funny
because you're like someone. Did know?
Not really correct me on like mydisability.
Yeah. But anyway, all of these other
like people like my followers and community jumped on and
we're like leaving him educationin like really nice ways.
And so his comments got like a bunch of replies or giving him
(39:10):
information and education and I'm like sucks to suck.
You wanted to hate. And instead we're all just like,
informing you and being kind. And it was awesome.
Oh, I can't imagine the amount of notifications just Ding, Ding
Ding Ding, you know, like it was.
Oh, I'd be pissed. That's awesome, though.
Also to have a community of people who not only will kind of
(39:33):
like, stick up for you, but alsowho, who caught your drift.
They were like, oh, we're doing this in a nice way.
I got you. Yeah.
That's sweet. It was really cool.
Oh, my gosh. OK, honestly, I don't really
know how long I wanna do this for, but I'm gonna be really
honest. I don't know if I'm keeping this
(39:54):
in or not. I guess this is related, but I
have stayed up till like two or three in the morning for the
past like week playing Minecraft.
And so everything in my body would like to not eat, not
sleep, not go to the bathroom, not do nothing.
I just want to lay in my bed andI want to play Minecraft.
And so I'm going to be really honest, this is taking a lot of
energy, but I'm really excited to be here.
(40:16):
Well, I'm always happy to adapt to energy levels because I get
it. And also Minecraft is a real
like thing that sucks you into hyper focus I feel.
Yeah, like I haven't played it in years, but my brothers and I
used to love it. But we would literally like not
play it for months and then go like a few weeks where we'd play
it like obsessively and like youjust would just get sucked in
(40:39):
and would build like these full on worlds and all this stuff.
And it's like, I would want to do it like all day every day.
And then we'd go through a period of not playing it again
and then we'd get sucked in again.
It is very hyper focus inducing.Yes, they built it well.
I mean, it's probably yeah what they wanted.
OK, it's better than social media.
(41:00):
OK, at least I'm learning stuff in there.
That's how I feel about books. Yes.
I look at like all the insane amount of books I have.
So I have 7 bookshelves in my bedroom.
That's crazy. It's basically a library with a
bed in it at this point. That's you can even say like I
(41:22):
have, I know. They're like book pages behind
you. Yeah, but I always think like,
you know what? I have hundreds of books, but I
could have spent all that money on drugs.
So yay, books. I'm learning it's a positive way
to spend all of my money. Yeah, that was very funny thing
(41:43):
to say. Be like, well, I could be
spending it on drugs, so. OK listener, if you would like
to see Savvy's cute book wall and her outfit and her cat,
there's video on Patreon. Additionally, I did word vomit
on an entire episode about how much I love Minecraft on Patreon
(42:04):
as well, so please go do that. This is.
My side plug and yes while goingon Patreon to see my cute cat
she gets a lot of comments when I post her on Instagram.
I get all these people replying and being like, her face is so
gorgeous and I'm like, yes, I know she.
Is she's so pretty well and you have an orange boy too.
What it Jackson? Yes, Jackson.
(42:28):
I get a price OK. And we also have so Jackson's my
orange cat, and Prunella's the one who's been on screen.
She's a tortoise shell. But then they're both my cats.
But I live with my family and myyoungest brother also has his
own cat called Dina, and she's the fluffiest black cat alive.
So it's very cute because we have an orange cat and a black
(42:50):
cat and an orange and black cat.It feels like it was made to.
Be yes cat sandwich. Yes, What about you?
You have a ginger boy and do youhave any other cats?
See, I have a torti as well. Cute.
They're brother and sister, and it's not a cat sandwich, but
since they're brother and sister, the tortoise has one leg
(43:12):
that perfectly matches her brother, and so when they curl
up together they like look like yin and Yang adjoined.
Cute. Yeah, and then we found a kitten
on a roof. He's a Maine Coon and he's an
asshole. I'd love a Maine Coon.
But yes, but he's pretty and he's fluffy and I I understand I
could have paid hundreds of dollars for a Maine Coon, but
(43:34):
instead I found him on a roof. Which is always the better way?
Yes, there are so many cats, so shelter's 100%.
Yes, what do you say? Or Blues, you know, find them on
a roof as well. That works.
The what do they say online the cat distribution system where
(43:55):
you just the universe selects you to have a cat.
I love that. I do too.
I never had any intention of getting a cat when I was
younger, but I just happened to be near a like a lost dog's
cat's home, whatever, a shelter with my family.
(44:16):
And we were looking at the cats and they're all cute.
And I just saw Jackson out of like, you know, there were so
many cats and so many kittens. He was with all of his siblings,
but I just saw him and I was like, Oh my gosh.
And I was in love from that minute.
And I had no intention of like, I hadn't been interested in
getting a cat. I had my heart set on a dog.
But I saw Jackson. I was like, we're meant to be
(44:37):
like. That one's mine.
So it was very spot on. Oh.
That's the cutest. Wow.
Anyway, that was a big tangent it was, but it's working on
these cats. Amazing.
Yes, key cats are the best. OK, well, yeah, anyone, if you
want to go look at the cats, youcan do that.
(45:00):
Wow, great tangent. OK, something I wanted to say
because we're kind of talking about how social media can be an
echo chamber and having conversations like this,
following people with differing opinions is so important, I
think, for everyone because, yeah, you don't want to be stuck
with people just being like, you're correct, you're
(45:22):
absolutely right. And everything you say like
you're not going to learn. You want to either, yeah, like
you said, solidify your own opinion or be like, oh, actually
I kind of agree with you. I wanna say for the people who
are listening, these episodes are supposed to be that like
it's supposed to be. You're able to listen to
(45:44):
something that you're like, oh, I do wonder about that question
and I would like to hear your take on it.
Unlike you saying that people might not understand late
diagnosis because they don't think about what it feels like
to be in their shoes. I would also like to just say
from a science perspective, the DSM 5, the newest version of
(46:05):
like the diagnostic criteria just came out a couple years ago
and it did specify different criteria for like autism and
ADHD. Like up until 2012 you weren't
allowed to have both like so. That's really weird.
(46:26):
Yeah, so it's like that makes sense why especially girls, like
if you go to the doctor and almost like your experience, but
if this were 10 years prior, if you go in there and they go this
looks like neurodivergence and they go, oh, which one?
And they go, well, if it's autism, that's kind of like a
different thing. So what if we just say that it's
(46:48):
ADHD and you're good? And like she could just, she
just might need to like listen to music while she does her
homework versus now you go in and you could be like, oh, hey,
you have ADHD. Hey, something still feels like
it's different, missing like. Oh.
You can have another thing like that wasn't an option before, so
(47:09):
of course there's so many more diagnosis now.
Also, yeah, it, it's a whole thing to like think about and
wonder about because even in Australia ADHD isn't classified
as a disability. And like our healthcare system,
the autism is. And it's because I think it's
(47:30):
his like medication treats the ADHD, so it's not like visible
or whatever. It's like you know that.
Makes it more. It doesn't even work for
everyone. Medication.
Some people might not want medication.
I mean, medication was part of the reason that, like, my autism
(47:52):
was found because the medicationmanages my ADHD.
And now I'm, like, more visibly autistic.
But yeah, it's interesting because then you wonder if they
couldn't diagnose both, like, would they then be more likely
to choose ADHD like practitioners because they felt
like they weren't, you know, giving someone a disability
(48:13):
title for the rest of their lifeAnd like, that's, you know, not
seen as something good or whatever in the eyes of those
people. Right it.
Makes you wonder like how many were skewed.
Yeah, it's, yeah, it's very interesting.
But I'm just thinking like how frustrating must have have been
(48:35):
to find out, like we're talking about find out like you're
autistic later in life, finding out that like your parents
technically knew like that must.Be Yeah, would mess with your
mind a lot. See.
Yeah. When you're late diagnosed and
your parents never knew either, It's you're all going on the
(48:58):
journey together. You know, there's no blame.
Like it's it's no one's fault. It's just how it ended up.
But if you knew that your parents withheld that, then
there is very different. Yeah.
Then you can point at someone and go it was your fault.
I can't do that. My mom's autistic too, so it is
(49:21):
her fault genetically. Which is hard to think.
My parents don't recognize it 'cause they already like that
too so. Yes.
Like yes, it is your mom's faultand that you're normal to her
because that's her normal. Like, in a yeah, weird topsy
turvy way. Yes, no, I did.
(49:42):
I did a whole, I did a whole episode with her about, you
know, the whole question of likein the media of can autistic
people contribute to a society? I was like, mom, what do you
think? And we literally had that whole
conversation where she was like,I didn't know there was
anything, quote, UN quote, wrongwith you because you acted like
everyone else I knew, which was me, your siblings, my mom.
(50:04):
So yeah. So I mean your family, yeah.
Yeah, also I love having autistic family members.
It is my favorite to go over andbe like Oh my gosh I love
feeling normal. I do like it too.
Like I have a cousin who's autistic and the last time I saw
him at my nana's house, I was reading a book like surprise
(50:28):
Surprise and he came up to me and he was like, do you have any
book recommendations? And so I was like, like what are
you into? Like I need to suss out this
before I give them. And when I gave him the
recommendations, he went and wrote them down and took them
away with him. And I was like, that is the
biggest someone who takes my recommendations.
(50:49):
Like he wasn't asking to be polite.
He wanted recommendations so he could go actually read them.
And I was like, that's like the dream.
Isn't it so nice to be around people who don't do the no
offense, but a little offense, the neurotypical thing of like,
let me do the polite thing and be like, oh, what are you
reading? Tell me about it.
(51:10):
And then they walk away and I'm like, you didn't remember a word
I said. I like just having conversations
because you're actually interested.
You know, I don't want to ask someone about their work if I
have no interest in their work and they're probably asked by
everyone about their work And just because it's the norm,
(51:30):
like, but if I know they like this book I read a while ago,
like let's chat about that, that's way better.
I I just think it works for everyone.
Like talk about interesting topics.
I used to always hate it when I was like a teenager and the
question all my older relatives would ask was like, how's
school? What are you going to do after
(51:52):
school? And be like, I spent all week at
school. Can we talk about something
that's not school? Like, yeah, social niceties were
never my thing. But with like late diagnosis,
you kind of said it earlier, it really is that you either have a
(52:15):
more internalized version of neurodivergence or I forgot to
say it when we were talking about it.
But the the workarounds, the like self accommodations to
essentially make yourself, I don't know if this is
politically, I don't know how tosay this, but like make yourself
have lower support needs like. Yeah, that's what made me like
(52:40):
when my first psychologist suggested ADHD, I was like, Nah,
I'm not messy. I'm not like to things like,
Nah, Nah. And then she was like, you need
to look it up and look up like compensatory is that the word
compensatory Behaviours and things cover it up and all of
that sort of stuff. And then when I started going
(53:02):
down that rabbit hole on the Internet, I was like, whoa, like
not everyone needs 10 alarms to help them leave the house on
time with everything they need and all sorts of stuff.
And yeah, that's what then was like, oh, OK.
Like I just unknowingly come up with all these behaviours to
(53:25):
help manage the behaviours that were harder in my life and
disabling it. Yeah, yeah.
So that yeah, you talk about allof your like different tools in
the main episode we did. So I'm excited for that to come
out because honestly, I think you said some things in it that
(53:46):
I was like, I like that. I'm gonna take that.
Thank you very much. But when we talk about what did
you say, compensatory, whatever.Behaviors or whatever, yes.
My was like, I don't know, the stuff that we use, it makes
sense why the people around us or just the public in general
(54:10):
are like, what do you mean you're autistic?
Like you've like you said, you were able to accomplish XY and
Z. I've seen you look me in the
eye. I've seen you go to school like
you have a driver's license, like stuff like that, where like
you met the criteria of a functional societal human.
(54:35):
You're like, well, that doesn't mean that I don't have a
disability. It just means that I had to like
run to keep up with people who were walking.
Like I was just having to work alot harder.
And that's the same with a lot of marginalized commuters like
we were talking about. So just it makes sense that
there's such an idea that like diagnosis isn't valid because
(54:57):
people are like, what do you mean?
And I mean, it's probably why autistic and neurodivergent
people have such a strong crossover, but with all sorts of
other illnesses and disorders and stuff.
It's just like when you're usingso much energy and resources
from your body and mind just to do things everyone else does
(55:22):
with like barely any thought, then of course you can end up
with like your body is going to start having things that shut
down and stop acting funny and all sorts.
Like what else? I mean, that's like, I'm an
autistic burnout. And that's like the prime
example. Like that's how you get there is
(55:44):
your body is spending so much just to do the bare minimum and
it can't do that forever. Yeah, I can do a whole thing on
autistic burnout, man. That is like I, Yeah, I am also
an autistic burnout, but I don'thave the capacity to not be in
(56:06):
it. So I'm just gonna play Minecraft
for 8 hours after this and call it a day 'cause that's my way of
compensating for the way my nervous system is right now.
And I love it. And if anyone says I'm not
autistic, I would like to refer them to this moment.
Well, Safi, we legally have beenrecording for an hour and I
(56:32):
would like to go play Minecraft.Do you have anything else that
you would like to say? No, I think we've covered
everything really. I suppose the one thing else
that I would add is just that it's not a trend right now to
have ADHD and autism. So yes, the diagnosis are
trending up, but the amount of people is actually staying the
(56:58):
same. It's just that more of these
people are being caught in diagnostic assessments.
So I think that's an important thing for people to remember.
Like it's not like there are more people with ADHD and autism
and whatever else, it's just that they're being caught more
and actually getting the diagnosis.
(57:19):
So it's definitely not a trend. Like scientifically it is a
trend going upwards, but it is not a trend as in like a fad.
It's not like it's just more people getting the recognition
of who they are. Yes, yeah, statistically you
will see it go up as the people who are supposed to get
diagnosed get diagnosed now, andthen it'll plateau because all
(57:43):
those people existed before thiscriteria came out.
Yes, very weird. They've always existed.
Mind blown. Just kidding, I don't think this
is going to change anyone's mind, but hopefully they can
listen to differing opinions andthen be like, and I don't
believe a word of that, but at least they listened.
(58:07):
Well, Saffy, for anyone who doesn't know who you are, which
is like their own fault, where can they find you?
You're on social media. We talked about it in this
episode. Where can I find you?
Yes. So I'm on Instagram which is at
Neuro Sparkly Saffy and if you're watching, I have little
(58:31):
Prunella in front of the camera again.
And if you want incentive to go follow my Instagram, she is on
there a lot. So go follow Neuro Sparkly
Saffy. I also have YouTube which is
Saffron County Smith and I started a blog recently which
I'm really enjoying and that's also called Neuro Sparkly Safi.
(58:54):
But you can have a link tree on my Instagram with everything.
So if you get lost or whatever, just go to my Instagram and then
go to the link tree and then that could tell you so.
Right, which I will link it in the show notes so that this can
be easier for everyone. They go to your Instagram, they
go to the link tree, they can doeverything they want there and
(59:15):
you really do post a lot of cat pictures.
It's delightful. Yeah, it's hard not to.
I take a million photos every day.
I'm like, everyone has to see them.
They're too cute to keep to myself.
Yes. No, that's a good point.
OK. Well, listener, that is all we
have for you today. Go follow Saff on Instagram and
(59:37):
YouTube and the blog. But otherwise, I'm Clark, this
is Saffy, and this has been chronically the sickest podcast
you know. That's all folks.
Thank you so much for listening.If you liked this episode, click
that follow up button on your podcast app of choice to get
(59:59):
notified every other week. You can find the podcast on
Instagram and TikTok at Chronically the Sickest Podcast.
Let me know if you have any questions or just want to chat.
I love hearing from y'all. Until next time, I'm Clark, and
this has been Chronically the Sickest podcast you know.
(01:00:21):
Disclaimer, this is a conversational podcast and while
we make sure our diagnosis journey, symptoms and treatment
plan, this is not medical advice.
If you have any questions regarding your health, please
reach out to your doctor and have a great day.
Hello folks, and welcome to Chronically the Sickest, the
podcast where we talk about all things that make us chronically
the sickest people we know. I'm Clark, your host.
It's nice to chat with you this week.
Join us as we dive into the episode, sit back, relax, and
enjoy the show. Hello SAF, and welcome back to
(00:34):
Chronically the Sickest. This episode will almost
certainly be out before your main episode, but technically
welcome back. Hi, thank you for having me on
again Clock. I had a lot of fun last time,
which yes will be actually next time.
So I'm really excited to be backand just be able to chat about
(00:55):
some. Controversial topics, yes I
know. I feel like you are actually the
perfect person to do this episode with just because on
your main app we talked about the fact that you were diagnosed
with both ADHD and autism later in life, which same here.
So I think this will be a very fun episode.
(01:18):
I think so too. Should be good.
Our experiences might be a little bit different with this
topic because I'm in the US and you're in Australia.
So the big kind of question of this episode or the topic, the
inflammatory controversial topicis, is ADHD in autism?
(01:38):
All these late diagnosis, are they like, are they real?
Is this just a trend? Is this just the kids want
something to be wrong with them?I would really like to discuss
that because, I mean, you were diagnosed later in life.
And as a lot of people in this community know, like autism is a
(02:00):
disabling condition. Like that's literally part of
the diagnostic criteria is that it has to affect you negatively.
And so I would love to hear maybe a little bit about your
diagnosis process and what you think about this idea that late
diagnosed Audi HD is a trend? Yeah, well for me for diagnosis,
(02:27):
I was diagnosed with ADHD 1st and that's like a rocky story
because I was diagnosed by multiple psychologists about 3
years ago. So I would have been, I think I
was like 19 when it when psychologist first my personal
psychologist brought it up as a suggestion and then I got
(02:50):
officially diagnosed by an ADHD psychologist.
But then in Australia, the process like a psychologist's
diagnosis is valid, but if you ever want to try medication for
ADHD, you have to have a psychiatrist diagnosis.
So I actually only got that about a year ago.
I did first try to see a psychologist one time and it
(03:15):
really didn't go down well and ended quite badly.
And it took me about a year and a half to want to try that again
and see another psychiatrist. And then that second time was
when I got the diagnosis and wasable to stop medication.
So it's like confusing because Iwas diagnosed 3 years ago, but
you kind of also diagnosed one year ago.
(03:36):
I'm like, I don't know, take it as you want.
Well that means you're like EE triple E diagnosed with ADHD.
So if anyone wants to fight you on it, you can be like, no, I
really have it. Yes, multiple people can give
you the stance. And then with autism, I was
diagnosed in April this year, sothat was quite new.
(04:00):
But I feel like because I'd already learned so much through
the ADHD diagnosis and like getting pulled into the
neurodivergent community that way, that it felt less jarring.
Like I, I already knew a bit about autism and you're a
divergent. So it's like, you know, easier
to accept the second diagnosis than the first, I feel.
(04:21):
Yeah, that like transitional period where you're like, Oh my
gosh, everything in my life could be explained by this
diagnosis and then. Yeah, the big thing is you think
like you have this personality and then you get diagnosed and
you're like, I don't have a personality, I have a diagnosis.
Like everything I thought was me, it's just ADHD and autism.
(04:44):
It's like, oh, I'm not unique. Like I thought, I'm like in this
group of everyone else that's sosimilar.
Oh my gosh, that is wow. I feel a little called out
because that's exactly how I felt.
I was like, Oh my gosh, no, I I don't have a personality.
That's cool. It's just all my quirks.
(05:05):
They were a neurosis. Yes, but I feel like this is
such a good topic to chat about because I was thinking about it
the other day and I posted a reel on Instagram and then I
reposted it the same reel onto YouTube Shorts.
(05:26):
And what it was, is it was basically just like me doing
sort of like skit thing talking about how even before you're
diagnosed and even if you were to never receive that diagnosis,
if you're autistic, you're always autistic.
Like so it's like what we were saying before, I think we
(05:47):
weren't recording yet, but what we were basically saying is that
like the diagnosis just says what you are, but you've always
been autistic or had ADHD beforethat point.
And after that point, it doesn't, the diagnosis doesn't
mean you suddenly get whatever it is.
It's just giving you knowledge about yourself and how you've
always been. And so I did a little reel on
(06:10):
that basically saying like, you know, even like even if I were
never diagnosed with autism, I would still actually be
autistic. I just wouldn't know and no one
else would maybe not know. Like they wouldn't know either.
And so on Instagram like that was fine.
But then it when I put it onto YouTube it blew up but on the
wrong side of the. Internet, I knew that where it
(06:32):
was going. Yeah, so I ended up like just
stopping looking and replying tocomments because I was like, I
can't, I can't be bothered at this stage.
But it was just all these peoplelike, yeah, but you can't just
decide you're autistic and and all this stuff.
And they all ended up talking about like self diagnosis in the
comments and stuff, which was like, not really what I've been
(06:54):
talking about anyway. And it's a whole different
topic. And I was like a couple of
comments. I was like, I have a diagnosis.
I'm just saying that like, it just proves that something has
always existed. Doesn't make the thing exist.
But I ended up just stopping to reply because I was like, I
(07:15):
can't deal. Like all these people who just
did, they don't care to, like, listen to other opinions.
But yeah, it was kind of interesting.
And it wasn't like it was OK because it didn't feel like a
personal attack. Like I was able to handle it OK.
But it was really weird having it blow up on, like, the other
(07:35):
side of the Internet when I'm soused to, you know, when you're
in your own, like, comfortable community bubble on social
media, you see people that are like you and you all sort of
connect and it feels really niceand positive.
And it's just occasionally when you post something and instead
of going to that like little community, you have it like pops
to some other random opposite community and you're like, Oh
(07:58):
no, so. Yeah, the Internet, I think, is
very weird right now because we are so used to being in our own
bubbles where you're like, everyone agrees with me and
everyone knows exactly what I'm going through.
And then you forget that like there are people who believe
completely the opposite of you. Yeah.
And I mean, that's also, like, not a good thing.
(08:21):
You know, it's not always good to just be surrounded by yes men
and everyone who agrees with youand just says yes to everything.
Like it is, yeah, it's not goingto help you learn or grow in
your opinions. But then I feel like sometimes
the Internet is so, like, one thing or the other, you know,
(08:42):
Like, I feel like my posts either go to everyone who's like
me or they just fly off and go to everyone who's the exact
opposite. It's like, it's like, where's
the middle ground? Like, I feel like we need that
more. Yeah, there's a lot of echo
chambering on the Internet. Yes, no, I think I tried to film
(09:02):
a real where I was like trying to explain the like feeling of
like, why can't? Why can't we have a nuanced
opinion? Like why isn't there like a
middle of like, yes, I do believe this thing, but also
let's talk about this. And it just every time I tried
to film it, I was like, this isn't going to go well.
Speaking on this exact topic is exactly what's going to happen.
(09:25):
OK, first of all, so sorry that your real got on or your YouTube
short got on the wrong side of the Internet.
That's always annoying. But I am glad that you're
handling it well. Thanks.
Also, totally unrelated, but I really like your cute little
dinosaur earrings. I've been like distracted by
them this whole time and like checking them out.
(09:48):
They're very cute. They're I think they're from
Amazon, but thank you. No, I love them.
They're like my favorite. I just have like 17 pairs and
whenever I can't figure out an earring to put with my outfit,
I'm just like, oh, good thing I have lots of color versions of
dinosaurs. But thank you.
(10:11):
OK, So now that you kind of talked a little bit about like
your experience as someone with Audi HD as is the shortened
condensed version of autistic and ADHD, how do you feel like
the response has been to having a diagnosis late in life?
(10:33):
Like what? What has that been like for you?
It's really interesting. I think people have been less
surprised by my autism diagnosisthan they have by my ADHDI think
I kind of kept the ADHD diagnosis, like mostly private.
I didn't like go about sharing it, but I also didn't keep it a
(10:54):
secret. I was just like sort of in
between about it. But often I think when I
mentioned it to people offhandedly, they'd be like, oh,
really? I'm like a little bit surprised,
like people I know in my life. But once I got the autism
diagnosis, I was actually like really happy about that one and
(11:16):
really wanted to celebrate it. Not that I wasn't happy about
ADHD, it's just that I was goingthrough so many struggles at the
time when I got my autism diagnosis.
So I was like, OK, thank you forlike validating everything, like
right when I needed it. And so I was like, you know
what, I'm just going to do an Instagram post on my public and
(11:38):
my private account and I'm goingto put it on my Facebook account
so all like my old relatives cansee it too.
I was like, I'm just going to say hello, guys, I got this
diagnosis. Bye.
And that's pretty much what I did.
I just did a post. I was like, hey, guess what?
I got this diagnosis today. And then that was like the whole
of the post. But yeah, it felt.
(12:03):
Like. People have been less surprised
about that and a lot of people have been very supportive.
Both not that like people that Idon't know in real life, but
also my family, I feel like they've been better about it.
I don't know since I maybe because I just did it in a big
post and they didn't find out about it individually.
(12:25):
You know, like if everyone's leaving positive comments, you
can't learn very well posts saying like I don't support you
or something. So works easier that way.
But yeah, I've been very fortunate to, I feel like have a
generally good response across the board.
But I know it's not like that for a lot of people.
(12:46):
And I think there are a lot of people who aren't also who give
the opinion that adult diagnosisor a trend and all that.
They aren't necessarily saying it personally, like picking out
people, but they're just saying it.
There's a lot like just general,like just say like, oh, it's
ridiculous, all these people, all these, and it's kind of just
(13:07):
referencing the community as a whole rather than pinpointing
someone. I think you make a really good
point that people individually can be like, of course, like, I
support you. I'm so glad that you got this
diagnosis and like great and like being positive, but making
those comments about the whole of the late diagnosis community
(13:32):
and. It's like people would never
that be like, oh, I'd never likeattack you like I know you like
you're the. Exception in their mind.
What you Yeah. And so when they make those big
statements in their mind or not even, but they just think like
they're excluding you, like you're not part of that sweeping
(13:53):
statement they're making. And I think that's across the
board with so much, you know, like people like, you could
literally put that to anything. Like I think that happens
probably a lot with homophobic stuff as well.
It's like, yes, but I like love and accept you.
But I'm going to make this grandsweeping statement about like
(14:13):
everyone who's gay, but it doesn't mean you.
And I think that happens probably in every like
marginalized group you'd find some sort of equivalent.
Yes, people love to have like a sense of everyone thinks that
they're a good person, you know,And so it would contradict their
(14:37):
like the version of themselves that they see if they were to be
like, no, your diagnosis isn't valid.
This is a trend. I really think you need to fix
your neurodivergence. So instead they make sweeping
statements to everyone else, butthey go, no, but like you, I
love you and you go wait. It's like, so do you believe
(14:59):
what you just said and put out into the ether into the public,
or do you believe what you just said to me?
Because they're contradicting statements and they're like, for
me, I have family members that are like, it's so great that
like you got this diagnosis and I'm like really proud of you.
And like you're speaking out online.
(15:20):
And then they post things on social media that are like, you
know, people who shall not be named in the government with
three letter acronym names in the US government are like
saying that we need to fix autism and that autism is called
Best Buy vaccines. And they like to post all about
that. And then they're like, but
you're fine. Like, thanks, friend.
(15:43):
I. It is weirdly jarring.
Is it so I wanna ask, 'cause you're in Australia, is it the
same over there? Like, is autism derogatory over
there? Like, is that something that
they're trying to fix? Quote UN quote?
(16:05):
So it's hard to know exactly because I haven't lived as an
autistic person anywhere else. But we One thing I really like
is our political system is less black and white and people
(16:27):
aren't as ruled by their political beliefs.
Like often times you can have lots of friends and family and
you won't even know who they would vote for.
It's just not something that's really discussed.
It's like sort of private and itdoesn't like govern every
decision you make, I suppose. So that is helpful.
(16:51):
And I feel like our government has a lot less control in, in
stuff like that. It has to pass through a lot of
levels for something to happen and change to be made.
So I feel like that can be very helpful.
But like definitely socially there is still the thing of
(17:12):
people like that do use autisticas an insult.
Like if someone's, I don't know,just doing something odd or
being silly or whatever, they'llbe like, oh, you're so autistic
or something like that as an insult.
And I definitely have heard thatoften.
But yes, so like at that level, like the social community level,
(17:36):
it's definitely a problem. And they would still behave as
some people in Australia who believe that vaccines cause
autism and whatnot, like, you know, but I do feel like they
have less power over our policies and such.
(17:57):
Wow, that is fascinating. That sounds the political part
sounds delightful. Sorry.
The other stuff obviously not, but OK.
I just want to talk to whoever started spreading the rumor that
vaccines cause autism. I just want to talk to them
because they got around to a lotof countries real fast.
It's such a yeah, ridiculous because it was like one study
(18:22):
and it wasn't well done and likeit was really bad because just
because something's in the studydoesn't mean you should take it
at face value. You need to look at like the
significance of it, like the P value and all that.
Like there's so much stuff. How many people were in the
study, how long the follow up, what they tested, yada yada.
(18:43):
Like you can't just because it'swritten in a study be like, Oh
yeah, I mean, it's good. Like that would be nice, but
that's not the reality. And because there was one really
bad study done on vaccines and autism, it's like created this.
And so many people have created good quality studies that have
(19:03):
disproved this. But because of this one study
and it getting into the media and all sorts, you just end up
with all these people who still stick by it even though it was
poorly done. Yeah, like it was disproven.
Sorry. OK, I was, I was, you were
(19:24):
saying that and I was like, whatstudy is it?
Because I know that it's from a while ago and I have like, OK,
it's wow. It's a study from the 1990s and
it has since been retracted. So it's like.
Yeah. That's just crazy that like, all
of this 30 years later, I'm bad at math 35, whatever.
(19:46):
Yeah, it's like it has such a grip over society to be like
vaccines cause autism and autismis bad and we want to fix it,
when in reality, yes, it's a disabling condition, but at the
same time, it's not the worst thing that could happen to you.
(20:10):
You could have measles. Yeah, no.
And it is so linked to your personality.
But it's odd because yeah, you could like if you could
theoretically take the autism orADHD or whatever out of someone,
you'd be taking away a lot of disabling aspects of their life
(20:31):
for sure. But you'd also be taking like
their whole personality. So they'd just be like a nothing
like like you wouldn't have anything that makes you, you.
So it's kind of hard because they are so joined.
So it's like, why would you wantto get rid of it if that was
even a thing? Like, surely you don't want the
(20:51):
people you love to just be like shells of people?
Wow, what a way to put that 'cause I mean, we started off
this episode being like, gettingthe diagnosis later in life is
like, Oh my gosh, all of my personality was actually
neurodivergent. But then on the flip side of
that, if you take away the neurodivergent, you take away
(21:13):
the person. Yeah.
Well, I hope the listeners are gonna have the same revelations
I'm having 'cause it is. I mean, you get this.
I mean, you kind of said that you had it more with your ADHD
diagnosis, 'cause that one kind of a little more drawn out.
But like getting the diagnosis, you really have to grapple with
(21:33):
like every moment of your life up until the diagnosis and look
back on it and be like, whoa, I was this thing.
Yeah, the amount of like reflecting you do is insane.
So like it depends what situation, like whether it's
(21:54):
leading, knowing you're going for an assessment and like
leading up to that. Or it could be like once you've
got the diagnosis and then you're like once you've got it,
you're like, Oh my gosh, reflecting on all of this.
And, and it's also like it's twoparts because it's reflecting
like seeing your personality in the diagnostic criteria, but
(22:15):
it's also things like grieving and like looking back and being
like, would this bad thing have happened if I'd known and got in
support or this bad thing or this bad thing and like it.
It's insane the amount of thinking you do about your
diagnosis once you receive it. There is always the idea of when
(22:37):
you get your diagnosis late, you're like, what would it have
been like if I'd gotten it earlier?
But then you speak to people whohave gotten it earlier and
they're like, it's not the same as right now.
People would call you slurs and you would be stuck in a
classroom where they didn't let you speak.
And like it wasn't this like utopian experience even though.
(23:01):
Like you said, you have to like you, you think, oh, I wish I'd
had that. I wish I'd had that.
And then all these people who did have it and they're like,
this is how bad it was. And then like, I don't know if
they wish for the opposite or not, but like it's so lose lose
because the grass really is not greener on the other side at
(23:24):
all. You just think it is.
And like, maybe you would have been lucky and gotten all of the
help and support you needed, butlikely you would not have is the
unfortunate reality. People are gonna hate to hear
that one. Yeah, no, the grass is not
always greener. Oh I would really like to ask
(23:45):
someone who was diagnosed earlier if they have the same
question of like. Feel like you should do an
episode of comparing like like diagnosed person versus early
diagnosed person and comparing childhood and growing up
(24:06):
experiences and stuff. OK, yes, but there's also people
that I found out through, you know, the deep dive you do on
the Internet after being diagnosed, as we all do.
I assume is there are people whowere diagnosed when they were
younger, their parents never told them and they got
(24:26):
rediagnosed as an adult. And that not just that fuck that
would fuck me up. I would trust no one ever for
the rest of my life. I'd be so I'm I'd be more angry
with my parents then than if I than I was now.
Yeah, I know that. Yeah.
Sorry. That was I'm sorry.
Would be insane. I don't know.
'Cause that's worse. You're like, I really could have
(24:47):
had a different experience than I did growing up, feeling like
growing up neurodivergent, not knowing you're a neurodivergent.
Like people use all these different words for it, but it's
like you feel broken. You feel like there's something
wrong with you and you feel likelife takes way more energy for
(25:08):
you than everyone else. And you just assume that that's
just how it is and everyone elseis powering through it.
And in reality, they're not. I've seen people compare it to,
you know, you get, you either get the diagnosis, like the
label of autism autistic, or youget the label of weird, odd,
stupid, silly, quirky, all sortsof like other labels that you'd
(25:32):
rather not have. Perhaps if you'd just been given
that one label, it's like, oh, that's way easier.
Like at least you know something.
It's a neutral term rather than potentially getting awful terms
given to you. Yeah, OK.
I really like that you just called autism a neutral term,
(25:53):
because it is and. Wow.
I forget sometimes that labels don't have to a define you and
they don't have to mean anythingother than oh this is my life
experience. Yeah, and I mean, it's hard
because so much with like the term autism especially, I feel
(26:16):
like it's a constant. Like there there's a camp of
people who are like, it's a superpower and then they can't
have people who are like, it's bad.
It's like this terrible thing that takes away someone's life
and whatever. But it doesn't have to be
either. You're allowed.
It's neutral and you're allowed to acknowledge.
These are the parts I like aboutit and being autistic.
(26:37):
And this is what I hate about it.
This is what I wish was different.
It's like anything else, you know, you can say like my brown
hair is neutral. You know, some days I might be
like, I love my hair, woo Hoo, and other days I hate it.
But it's like it's nearly good nor bad.
And it's the exact same way withneurodivergence.
(26:58):
It just is and. Good analogy.
I'm just thinking in in the linear.
What is that? Yeah, adjacent.
Sorry. It was like the lines and
they're parallel. God, can you tell I failed math?
Adjacent to your brunette analogy is the like people think
(27:24):
blondes have more fun and when you go blonde, people like it
more and you get more attention and people think that it's silly
when you're a little bit dumb versus if you're dumb and
brunette, people just call you dumb and brunette and that's the
exact same thing. I'm sorry, my brain was like,
yes, this is a good one. I like this.
(27:46):
OK, sorry, I wow, can you tell that I am never divergent?
OK, I feel like this is a littlebit been in all over the place
episode, but I'm kind of liking it.
I personally am having a lot of.Yeah, I feel like we're just
going down lots of tangents and it's great.
This is what happens when we don't have a like line by line.
(28:11):
How we're going to do an episodeis.
But I like it. Well, the listeners.
Malarkey. We could have gone on a tangent
about here for like ages or, or dinosaur earrings or something.
So at least the tangents we've been going on are somewhat
related, you know? They are.
And I'm assuming the people who are gonna be listening to this
(28:31):
are like, Oh yes, you know, they're here for this.
And I think honestly, they'd be here for the weird hair
conversation or the earring conversation as well.
But I'm just like sitting here and you're like saying something
and I'm like flabbergasted. I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is
crazy. And I'm like, people are gonna
love this. So I'm just like, yes, we've
(28:52):
gone off on so many tangents, but I feel like they've all
been, yeah, kind of related to what we're talking about.
Yeah, to bring my. OK, I was gonna say I was like,
what are you grabbing? Hello.
I know I'm actually a little bitsad that mine hasn't come out.
The I feel like, wow, yeah, thisis gonna be such a weird
episode. But the like question of like
(29:19):
why do you think that people find late diagnosis to be like
invalid? Like what do you think the
reason is like? I would love to hear your
opinion on potsies. Listen up.
We both know that precinctopy sucks.
Fainting to passing out when you're alone though, that is 2
(29:44):
thumbs down. It's so nerve wracking.
Like what if I pass out and hit my head or I start getting dizzy
while I'm driving? Am I gonna be safe or just in
general am I going to be safe asa disabled woman?
That anxiety, that is what gets you.
But I don't have that anymore. Well, I do have anxiety.
(30:07):
I am an OCD girlie but not aboutpassing out or my safety because
I just click my invisi wear necklace and both my family and
emergency personnel are alerted.The dizzies are scary no matter
how many times it happens, but knowing that I have a backup
plan is what makes me feel a little bit better, so maybe
(30:29):
that'll help you too. Using code sickest for 10% off
on your invisible wear purchase at the link in your description
is an option. Sending you salty vibes.
Okie dokie. Anyway.
I think a lot of it is just theyobviously you can't, but they
(30:50):
don't see inside our heads, in our minds and outwardly they
might just think, Oh well, like I've known you since however
long, like you seem fine, you'vedone this and this and this and
like whatever else. But they don't see all the other
struggles. And especially if you're, I
mean, a lot of late diagnosed people, which is probably it's a
(31:14):
factor that makes them less targeted for diagnosis early on
is but having internally presenting symptoms of ADHD and
or autism, whichever it is. And I think that's what's hard
is like, I know with my ADHDA, lot of it is internally
(31:34):
presenting like I, I'm combination and I definitely
have outward stuff, but and a lot of learnt to like hide and
work around so hard. And so yes, everyone sees that I
arrived to events on time and myroom is very organized and
whatnot, but they don't see all the extra energy that goes into
(31:57):
like me setting a million alarmsto help me get out of bed.
And then alarms tell me to leavethe house and to remember my
phone and remember this and remember that.
And they don't see that, yes, myroom is spotless, but I have to
as soon as I use something, it has to go in exactly the right
spot. That's specifically for that.
Or else if it like if I don't dothat, I'm going to end up with
(32:19):
like doom piles everywhere. And so it's just people aren't
seeing the behind the scenes. And so it's easy to look at
someone and be like, you seem fine to me if you're not saying
into their mind or all the extraeffort they have to go to just
to achieve the same thing. Yeah.
So what is that saying that people say you want to walk a
(32:41):
mile in someone else's shoes? So maybe people just aren't
doing that when they think of late diagnosed neurodivergence.
They're just not thinking. This is very literal, but on the
bright side, I'm wearing some really comfy slippers right now,
so if someone wanted to walk a mile on my shoes right now I
feel like that'd be pretty comfy.
(33:02):
I'm sorry. Wow.
Yeah, I'm sorry. My first thought was way to take
that literally. That feels on brand, Yes.
I mean, I'm barefoot right now, so I don't.
I feel like I'm barefoot most ofthe time, so if I wanted to walk
(33:22):
a mile in my shoes, honestly it wouldn't be a good time.
It depends where the mile is. If like a mile of carpet that
would be fine. That'd be good.
I like that thing. I feel like that's not a thing
anymore. Well, I'm thinking of like a red
carpet. I don't know if there's a mile
long red carpet, but there's like long ones, you know, like
(33:43):
award shows and stuff like that.True, true.
OK, guys, we. Just gotta get famous because
obviously like, I mean, we kind of use the same, but we don't
often say that saying in Australia with mile, just
because we don't use miles, kilometers.
Yeah, right. Well, you just say like you have
to walk in someone else's shoes.So we just don't use the
(34:05):
measurement I bet. America is the one that's like,
yeah, no, let's specify I. Think kilometers are better
because if you go for a run or awalk and you can go the same
distance and you can be like sappy, I went for a one one mile
walk and I can be like well yeah, I went for almost 2K2
(34:28):
kilometer walk and so I look more impressive do the same
walk. Yeah, so.
Well also every other country uses the metric system, so that
also might make one more sense. But no for sure, Lord over me
the fact that you can go on A to2 kilometer run, my brain was
(34:54):
like kilometer does not sound like a real word but it is.
Wow OK thank you for sharing what you think because I think
the whole point of these episodes is that they are
opinion pieces. Like it isn't.
Obviously our opinions are basedon our own experiences and like
(35:19):
you're talking from your own experience, but it is just kind
of like fascinating to be like, oh, this is what I think on a
topic. Talk to someone else and go Oh
my gosh, I didn't know you felt that way.
Yeah, and that's what I find so good about.
Like that's what I really enjoy about Instagram say is I'll make
sure I follow people who are part of the neurodivergent
(35:43):
community. Often for me, autistic people
that have very different experiences than me or opinions.
And sometimes I'll watch a videoand I'll like really disagree
with it, but I'm like, that's good.
I need to keep following this person so I can keep having
these different opinions and like coming at me and I can try
(36:08):
and see it from a different way.And it just, it either
strengthens your opinion or changes it in another way, which
is also very good sometimes too.But yeah, I love that about
social media because, I mean, I barely know any autistic people
in real life, let alone autisticpeople who are very different to
me. So at least through social
(36:30):
media, I see, you know, autisticpeople of color and autistic
people in different countries all around the world in
different like socioeconomic statuses or people with higher
support needs, all sorts of likeso many different opinions and
(36:51):
like experiences. And so it's a really good place
to just like try and, you know, seek out other.
People's opinions and experiences, too.
Yeah, I mean, that's exactly what we were talking about
before with like, the echo chamber.
It's good to have access to all these different opinions and
experiences. And also, yeah, you don't have
(37:15):
to leave a hate comment if you don't agree with what someone
did. But yeah, weirdly you can just
like scroll past. Yeah, but like, social media is
built to keep you there longer. And so if they know that you're
going to watch it and rewatch itwhile you're typing, you're like
and you suck and they'll keep showing you those videos and
(37:36):
therefore you will keep doing itanyway.
OK sorry that's a different tangent.
Would love to do a topical episode on social media because
I don't think kids should have access.
Yeah, neither. But on the topic of like hate
comments, I had a a person comment on one of my videos and
it was like, I think I was talking about my travel
(37:58):
experience, but it was like having a dynamic disability.
And then, yeah, he basically like left this con accusing me
and being like, so how come you're going to skating
competition, but you can't even walk around the airport and all
this stuff. And so I was like, you know
what? I'm going to like kill him with
kindness. And I responded and I was like,
hello, thanks for your comment. I hope you're going well.
(38:19):
And I was like telling him like,this is a great opportunity to
educate yourself. I suggest you look up dynamic
disabilities online. Thank you so much for being
interested in educating yourselfabout disabilities and the
disabled community. Like all this stuff.
And then he replied. Like correcting me about
(38:46):
something to do with dynamic disabilities was just funny
because you're like someone. Did know?
Not really correct me on like mydisability.
Yeah. But anyway, all of these other
like people like my followers and community jumped on and
we're like leaving him educationin like really nice ways.
And so his comments got like a bunch of replies or giving him
(39:10):
information and education and I'm like sucks to suck.
You wanted to hate. And instead we're all just like,
informing you and being kind. And it was awesome.
Oh, I can't imagine the amount of notifications just Ding, Ding
Ding Ding, you know, like it was.
Oh, I'd be pissed. That's awesome, though.
Also to have a community of people who not only will kind of
(39:33):
like, stick up for you, but alsowho, who caught your drift.
They were like, oh, we're doing this in a nice way.
I got you. Yeah.
That's sweet. It was really cool.
Oh, my gosh. OK, honestly, I don't really
know how long I wanna do this for, but I'm gonna be really
honest. I don't know if I'm keeping this
(39:54):
in or not. I guess this is related, but I
have stayed up till like two or three in the morning for the
past like week playing Minecraft.
And so everything in my body would like to not eat, not
sleep, not go to the bathroom, not do nothing.
I just want to lay in my bed andI want to play Minecraft.
And so I'm going to be really honest, this is taking a lot of
energy, but I'm really excited to be here.
(40:16):
Well, I'm always happy to adapt to energy levels because I get
it. And also Minecraft is a real
like thing that sucks you into hyper focus I feel.
Yeah, like I haven't played it in years, but my brothers and I
used to love it. But we would literally like not
play it for months and then go like a few weeks where we'd play
it like obsessively and like youjust would just get sucked in
(40:39):
and would build like these full on worlds and all this stuff.
And it's like, I would want to do it like all day every day.
And then we'd go through a period of not playing it again
and then we'd get sucked in again.
It is very hyper focus inducing.Yes, they built it well.
I mean, it's probably yeah what they wanted.
OK, it's better than social media.
(41:00):
OK, at least I'm learning stuff in there.
That's how I feel about books. Yes.
I look at like all the insane amount of books I have.
So I have 7 bookshelves in my bedroom.
That's crazy. It's basically a library with a
bed in it at this point. That's you can even say like I
(41:22):
have, I know. They're like book pages behind
you. Yeah, but I always think like,
you know what? I have hundreds of books, but I
could have spent all that money on drugs.
So yay, books. I'm learning it's a positive way
to spend all of my money. Yeah, that was very funny thing
(41:43):
to say. Be like, well, I could be
spending it on drugs, so. OK listener, if you would like
to see Savvy's cute book wall and her outfit and her cat,
there's video on Patreon. Additionally, I did word vomit
on an entire episode about how much I love Minecraft on Patreon
(42:04):
as well, so please go do that. This is.
My side plug and yes while goingon Patreon to see my cute cat
she gets a lot of comments when I post her on Instagram.
I get all these people replying and being like, her face is so
gorgeous and I'm like, yes, I know she.
Is she's so pretty well and you have an orange boy too.
What it Jackson? Yes, Jackson.
(42:28):
I get a price OK. And we also have so Jackson's my
orange cat, and Prunella's the one who's been on screen.
She's a tortoise shell. But then they're both my cats.
But I live with my family and myyoungest brother also has his
own cat called Dina, and she's the fluffiest black cat alive.
So it's very cute because we have an orange cat and a black
(42:50):
cat and an orange and black cat.It feels like it was made to.
Be yes cat sandwich. Yes, What about you?
You have a ginger boy and do youhave any other cats?
See, I have a torti as well. Cute.
They're brother and sister, and it's not a cat sandwich, but
since they're brother and sister, the tortoise has one leg
(43:12):
that perfectly matches her brother, and so when they curl
up together they like look like yin and Yang adjoined.
Cute. Yeah, and then we found a kitten
on a roof. He's a Maine Coon and he's an
asshole. I'd love a Maine Coon.
But yes, but he's pretty and he's fluffy and I I understand I
could have paid hundreds of dollars for a Maine Coon, but
(43:34):
instead I found him on a roof. Which is always the better way?
Yes, there are so many cats, so shelter's 100%.
Yes, what do you say? Or Blues, you know, find them on
a roof as well. That works.
The what do they say online the cat distribution system where
(43:55):
you just the universe selects you to have a cat.
I love that. I do too.
I never had any intention of getting a cat when I was
younger, but I just happened to be near a like a lost dog's
cat's home, whatever, a shelter with my family.
(44:16):
And we were looking at the cats and they're all cute.
And I just saw Jackson out of like, you know, there were so
many cats and so many kittens. He was with all of his siblings,
but I just saw him and I was like, Oh my gosh.
And I was in love from that minute.
And I had no intention of like, I hadn't been interested in
getting a cat. I had my heart set on a dog.
But I saw Jackson. I was like, we're meant to be
(44:37):
like. That one's mine.
So it was very spot on. Oh.
That's the cutest. Wow.
Anyway, that was a big tangent it was, but it's working on
these cats. Amazing.
Yes, key cats are the best. OK, well, yeah, anyone, if you
want to go look at the cats, youcan do that.
(45:00):
Wow, great tangent. OK, something I wanted to say
because we're kind of talking about how social media can be an
echo chamber and having conversations like this,
following people with differing opinions is so important, I
think, for everyone because, yeah, you don't want to be stuck
with people just being like, you're correct, you're
(45:22):
absolutely right. And everything you say like
you're not going to learn. You want to either, yeah, like
you said, solidify your own opinion or be like, oh, actually
I kind of agree with you. I wanna say for the people who
are listening, these episodes are supposed to be that like
it's supposed to be. You're able to listen to
(45:44):
something that you're like, oh, I do wonder about that question
and I would like to hear your take on it.
Unlike you saying that people might not understand late
diagnosis because they don't think about what it feels like
to be in their shoes. I would also like to just say
from a science perspective, the DSM 5, the newest version of
(46:05):
like the diagnostic criteria just came out a couple years ago
and it did specify different criteria for like autism and
ADHD. Like up until 2012 you weren't
allowed to have both like so. That's really weird.
(46:26):
Yeah, so it's like that makes sense why especially girls, like
if you go to the doctor and almost like your experience, but
if this were 10 years prior, if you go in there and they go this
looks like neurodivergence and they go, oh, which one?
And they go, well, if it's autism, that's kind of like a
different thing. So what if we just say that it's
(46:48):
ADHD and you're good? And like she could just, she
just might need to like listen to music while she does her
homework versus now you go in and you could be like, oh, hey,
you have ADHD. Hey, something still feels like
it's different, missing like. Oh.
You can have another thing like that wasn't an option before, so
(47:09):
of course there's so many more diagnosis now.
Also, yeah, it, it's a whole thing to like think about and
wonder about because even in Australia ADHD isn't classified
as a disability. And like our healthcare system,
the autism is. And it's because I think it's
(47:30):
his like medication treats the ADHD, so it's not like visible
or whatever. It's like you know that.
Makes it more. It doesn't even work for
everyone. Medication.
Some people might not want medication.
I mean, medication was part of the reason that, like, my autism
(47:52):
was found because the medicationmanages my ADHD.
And now I'm, like, more visibly autistic.
But yeah, it's interesting because then you wonder if they
couldn't diagnose both, like, would they then be more likely
to choose ADHD like practitioners because they felt
like they weren't, you know, giving someone a disability
(48:13):
title for the rest of their lifeAnd like, that's, you know, not
seen as something good or whatever in the eyes of those
people. Right it.
Makes you wonder like how many were skewed.
Yeah, it's, yeah, it's very interesting.
But I'm just thinking like how frustrating must have have been
(48:35):
to find out, like we're talking about find out like you're
autistic later in life, finding out that like your parents
technically knew like that must.Be Yeah, would mess with your
mind a lot. See.
Yeah. When you're late diagnosed and
your parents never knew either, It's you're all going on the
(48:58):
journey together. You know, there's no blame.
Like it's it's no one's fault. It's just how it ended up.
But if you knew that your parents withheld that, then
there is very different. Yeah.
Then you can point at someone and go it was your fault.
I can't do that. My mom's autistic too, so it is
(49:21):
her fault genetically. Which is hard to think.
My parents don't recognize it 'cause they already like that
too so. Yes.
Like yes, it is your mom's faultand that you're normal to her
because that's her normal. Like, in a yeah, weird topsy
turvy way. Yes, no, I did.
(49:42):
I did a whole, I did a whole episode with her about, you
know, the whole question of likein the media of can autistic
people contribute to a society? I was like, mom, what do you
think? And we literally had that whole
conversation where she was like,I didn't know there was
anything, quote, UN quote, wrongwith you because you acted like
everyone else I knew, which was me, your siblings, my mom.
(50:04):
So yeah. So I mean your family, yeah.
Yeah, also I love having autistic family members.
It is my favorite to go over andbe like Oh my gosh I love
feeling normal. I do like it too.
Like I have a cousin who's autistic and the last time I saw
him at my nana's house, I was reading a book like surprise
(50:28):
Surprise and he came up to me and he was like, do you have any
book recommendations? And so I was like, like what are
you into? Like I need to suss out this
before I give them. And when I gave him the
recommendations, he went and wrote them down and took them
away with him. And I was like, that is the
biggest someone who takes my recommendations.
(50:49):
Like he wasn't asking to be polite.
He wanted recommendations so he could go actually read them.
And I was like, that's like the dream.
Isn't it so nice to be around people who don't do the no
offense, but a little offense, the neurotypical thing of like,
let me do the polite thing and be like, oh, what are you
reading? Tell me about it.
(51:10):
And then they walk away and I'm like, you didn't remember a word
I said. I like just having conversations
because you're actually interested.
You know, I don't want to ask someone about their work if I
have no interest in their work and they're probably asked by
everyone about their work And just because it's the norm,
(51:30):
like, but if I know they like this book I read a while ago,
like let's chat about that, that's way better.
I I just think it works for everyone.
Like talk about interesting topics.
I used to always hate it when I was like a teenager and the
question all my older relatives would ask was like, how's
school? What are you going to do after
(51:52):
school? And be like, I spent all week at
school. Can we talk about something
that's not school? Like, yeah, social niceties were
never my thing. But with like late diagnosis,
you kind of said it earlier, it really is that you either have a
(52:15):
more internalized version of neurodivergence or I forgot to
say it when we were talking about it.
But the the workarounds, the like self accommodations to
essentially make yourself, I don't know if this is
politically, I don't know how tosay this, but like make yourself
have lower support needs like. Yeah, that's what made me like
(52:40):
when my first psychologist suggested ADHD, I was like, Nah,
I'm not messy. I'm not like to things like,
Nah, Nah. And then she was like, you need
to look it up and look up like compensatory is that the word
compensatory Behaviours and things cover it up and all of
that sort of stuff. And then when I started going
(53:02):
down that rabbit hole on the Internet, I was like, whoa, like
not everyone needs 10 alarms to help them leave the house on
time with everything they need and all sorts of stuff.
And yeah, that's what then was like, oh, OK.
Like I just unknowingly come up with all these behaviours to
(53:25):
help manage the behaviours that were harder in my life and
disabling it. Yeah, yeah.
So that yeah, you talk about allof your like different tools in
the main episode we did. So I'm excited for that to come
out because honestly, I think you said some things in it that
(53:46):
I was like, I like that. I'm gonna take that.
Thank you very much. But when we talk about what did
you say, compensatory, whatever.Behaviors or whatever, yes.
My was like, I don't know, the stuff that we use, it makes
sense why the people around us or just the public in general
(54:10):
are like, what do you mean you're autistic?
Like you've like you said, you were able to accomplish XY and
Z. I've seen you look me in the
eye. I've seen you go to school like
you have a driver's license, like stuff like that, where like
you met the criteria of a functional societal human.
(54:35):
You're like, well, that doesn't mean that I don't have a
disability. It just means that I had to like
run to keep up with people who were walking.
Like I was just having to work alot harder.
And that's the same with a lot of marginalized commuters like
we were talking about. So just it makes sense that
there's such an idea that like diagnosis isn't valid because
(54:57):
people are like, what do you mean?
And I mean, it's probably why autistic and neurodivergent
people have such a strong crossover, but with all sorts of
other illnesses and disorders and stuff.
It's just like when you're usingso much energy and resources
from your body and mind just to do things everyone else does
(55:22):
with like barely any thought, then of course you can end up
with like your body is going to start having things that shut
down and stop acting funny and all sorts.
Like what else? I mean, that's like, I'm an
autistic burnout. And that's like the prime
example. Like that's how you get there is
(55:44):
your body is spending so much just to do the bare minimum and
it can't do that forever. Yeah, I can do a whole thing on
autistic burnout, man. That is like I, Yeah, I am also
an autistic burnout, but I don'thave the capacity to not be in
(56:06):
it. So I'm just gonna play Minecraft
for 8 hours after this and call it a day 'cause that's my way of
compensating for the way my nervous system is right now.
And I love it. And if anyone says I'm not
autistic, I would like to refer them to this moment.
Well, Safi, we legally have beenrecording for an hour and I
(56:32):
would like to go play Minecraft.Do you have anything else that
you would like to say? No, I think we've covered
everything really. I suppose the one thing else
that I would add is just that it's not a trend right now to
have ADHD and autism. So yes, the diagnosis are
trending up, but the amount of people is actually staying the
(56:58):
same. It's just that more of these
people are being caught in diagnostic assessments.
So I think that's an important thing for people to remember.
Like it's not like there are more people with ADHD and autism
and whatever else, it's just that they're being caught more
and actually getting the diagnosis.
(57:19):
So it's definitely not a trend. Like scientifically it is a
trend going upwards, but it is not a trend as in like a fad.
It's not like it's just more people getting the recognition
of who they are. Yes, yeah, statistically you
will see it go up as the people who are supposed to get
diagnosed get diagnosed now, andthen it'll plateau because all
(57:43):
those people existed before thiscriteria came out.
Yes, very weird. They've always existed.
Mind blown. Just kidding, I don't think this
is going to change anyone's mind, but hopefully they can
listen to differing opinions andthen be like, and I don't
believe a word of that, but at least they listened.
(58:07):
Well, Saffy, for anyone who doesn't know who you are, which
is like their own fault, where can they find you?
You're on social media. We talked about it in this
episode. Where can I find you?
Yes. So I'm on Instagram which is at
Neuro Sparkly Saffy and if you're watching, I have little
(58:31):
Prunella in front of the camera again.
And if you want incentive to go follow my Instagram, she is on
there a lot. So go follow Neuro Sparkly
Saffy. I also have YouTube which is
Saffron County Smith and I started a blog recently which
I'm really enjoying and that's also called Neuro Sparkly Safi.
(58:54):
But you can have a link tree on my Instagram with everything.
So if you get lost or whatever, just go to my Instagram and then
go to the link tree and then that could tell you so.
Right, which I will link it in the show notes so that this can
be easier for everyone. They go to your Instagram, they
go to the link tree, they can doeverything they want there and
(59:15):
you really do post a lot of cat pictures.
It's delightful. Yeah, it's hard not to.
I take a million photos every day.
I'm like, everyone has to see them.
They're too cute to keep to myself.
Yes. No, that's a good point.
OK. Well, listener, that is all we
have for you today. Go follow Saff on Instagram and
(59:37):
YouTube and the blog. But otherwise, I'm Clark, this
is Saffy, and this has been chronically the sickest podcast
you know. That's all folks.
Thank you so much for listening.If you liked this episode, click
that follow up button on your podcast app of choice to get
(59:59):
notified every other week. You can find the podcast on
Instagram and TikTok at Chronically the Sickest Podcast.
Let me know if you have any questions or just want to chat.
I love hearing from y'all. Until next time, I'm Clark, and
this has been Chronically the Sickest podcast you know.
(01:00:21):
Disclaimer, this is a conversational podcast and while
we make sure our diagnosis journey, symptoms and treatment
plan, this is not medical advice.
If you have any questions regarding your health, please
reach out to your doctor and have a great day.
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