E55 Turning Emotional Pain Into Positive Drive

E55 Turning Emotional Pain Into Positive Drive

Hi Friends,

In this episode I talk about:

Emotional pain can really have a negative affect on our lives. What happens when we let ourselves "check out of life" so to speak and stop doing the things that we love because we are so hurt. Take the time to feel the ick and the hurt but don't stay stuck there. Take that pain and keep chasing your dreams and turn that pain into your drive to keep going.

Please reach out.

My Website is:

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My YouTube Channel is: (behind the scenes footage)

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@ClassicChroniclesdotca⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

I would love to hear from you! You can email me at:

[e-mail]

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Do you want to be a guest on my show? email me! Let's chat and get your Advice out to the world and make it a better place!

Did you find value in my episode and want to support me financially? You can buy me a coffee at:

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hi and welcome to Classic Advice.
My name is Scarlett Classic, your host.
To those of you that are new, onthis podcast I share stories
from my life in order to draw lessons from them to encourage
self improvement for a more fulfilling and happier life for
the both of us. Have you guys ever tried turning

(00:26):
emotional pain into positive drive?
I had a little bit of an epiphany or a breakthrough or
whatever you might like to call it this week.
But before we get into that, I have a very, very special shout

(00:47):
out to two of my listeners. One of them, her name is Sin,
and the other one, his name is Dave.
And these two wonderful, wonderful people went on my
website where you can buy me a coffee, you can send like a
monetary $5 donation towards theshow that I just put towards,

(01:11):
you know, buying my Zoom accountand buying the music for it and
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it just helps with the
production side of things. And anyways, I there was a
glitch and the notification frommy buy a buy me a coffee
account, the notification that they sent me coffee got sent to
spam and I found that out this week.

(01:35):
And I was so, so entirely grateful and horrified at the
same time because I wasn't able to say thank you promptly
because when people do that, youwant to say thank you very
promptly. So thank you, thank you, thank
you guys. You guys are awesome.
My listeners are the best. All right, so the story that I

(01:56):
want to share with you guys thisweek is a little bit of what
happened to me last year, which I did talk about in an episode
about emotional, emotional pain and, and deal dealing with that
betrayal of a of a close friend and being at that time of year

(02:20):
again. It, it just it got me thinking
about that whole experience. And I was in a lot of pain, a
lot of emotional pain. And I do have a history, like I
have talked on this show before that I did struggle with

(02:41):
depression. I did struggle with thoughts of
suicide. I don't anymore.
I just want to make that clear. I'm, I'm, I am good now and, but
I just, I was so down last year that I was scared that I was
going to get depressed again andfall back into that.

(03:02):
And I didn't want to, I didn't want it to get there.
So I was listening to my therapist when he told me that I
need to feel the bad feelings and process it and go through it
and not push it down and ignore that pain.
I had to let myself feel it. And when I was in that pain, I

(03:27):
felt like I couldn't come up to the microphone and I felt like I
couldn't work on my book. So I took a break and I, I know
I have explained on here before that that's why I took a break
from my show. Part of the reason anyways, then

(03:48):
the next part was my life just got thrown upside down with a
new job, a new career that I wasworking double the hours that I
used to work previously and justlearning how to juggle that and
manage my time with that. And then we sold our house and
we moved. So there was the whole move and

(04:10):
now we're living in a camper. So there was a lot of setup and
yeah, anyways, moving things, moving is not fun.
A lot of work, a lot of work. So it just took, it took a lot
of my time and I, I just stoppeddoing the show and a, a part of
me thought a lot about just quitting.
I was like, well, do I just quitbecause I haven't worked on it?

(04:31):
I'm so sporadic. I'm all over the place.
I'm not consistent. I'm not this I I then this past
couple of weeks, when I was thinking about what happened
last year, I was worried about, well, what if I start again and
something else happened and thenI quit recording and I'm not
here and I'm not consistent for you guys.
And it just and my and writing anovel, I have to be consistent

(04:55):
writing it or I forget about my characters.
And I say that Fiona has green eyes and she has blue eyes and
then my readers are like, what? And anyways, it's I caught that
error when I was editing yesterday's wife bring that up.
But it just really got me thinking about how, how, how do

(05:18):
I get through this? How do I cope with this?
And I was talking to a, a friendof mine and I was, I was just
thinking about, OK, if, if I hadsomeone else, like if, if one of
my listeners came to me with this specific problem, what
would I say to them? And the answer that I came up

(05:41):
with is to try, I guess not evenreally an answer.
It's just my, my whole emotions and changed.
And instead of being sad, I ended up getting frustrated and

(06:01):
if I'm being really honest, a little bit angry.
Like not full blown like crazy angry, just really frustrated
and irritated is that is the word really irritated.
That what what happened to me with the the pain of the
emotional betrayal the the the of of my of last year with that

(06:27):
friend that completely threw me under the bus.
I got angry. I was like, no, this, I am never
going to let something like thattake away from me again because
it, it, it, I felt like it, it almost took away a, a part of me

(06:49):
because I love writing and I love coming here and spending
time with you. I love this.
I love meeting you guys and, and, and having meetups on zoom
with my friends. I love it.
I love meeting you guys and getting emails from you and
sharing life with you guys, but my my problem was as I pulled

(07:14):
away into myself and I didn't let you guys be there for me and
that's my fault. That's that's all on me.
That's my fault and I have to own that.
I was one of the timeless truths.
I, I was talking about if you, if you, I think there's just

(07:35):
this last one. If you look back and you focus
too much on the bad, it you can't see the good ahead of you.
And that was what was happening.I so focused on the bad, not
necessarily looking very far back because it was just
happening, but I'm so focused onthe bad that I couldn't see the
good and I couldn't let you guysbe there for me.

(07:56):
And I need to really learn to let people be there for me.
It's so easy for me to be there for you.
And maybe that's you. Maybe you're going through a
really hard time right now and you want to reach out, but
you're like, oh, but maybe she'sgoing through a crummy time.
No, I don't care if I'm going through a crummy time or not.

(08:20):
Always reach out to me. I love being there for you guys
and so many of you showed me that you feel the same way
because when I was going througha tough time, you guys reached
out to me. So many of you reached out to
me. Dave, Cyn, JJ, Kevin, Amy, so

(08:46):
many of you reached out to me when I was going through about
time and I just, I, I couldn't, I, I just, so I'm sorry, sorry
that I couldn't let you guys be there for me.
This is, I'm working on it. We're all working on something.

(09:08):
I'm working on that. And I'm now turning my emotional
pain of what happened to me lastyear and I'm instead of it just
living there now I'm going to turn that emotional pain into my
positive drive to never let thathappen again.

(09:30):
And when I am down, I, I coped with it much better.
I didn't fall into depression. I definitely wasn't suicidal or
any of that. I dealt with it in that regard.
I did leaps and bounds and I didit a lot better than say
previous years. So that is a good thing and I
need to congratulate myself and say that was good.

(09:52):
I didn't get depressed. That was really, really good.
But I also need to let my community be there for me.
So I guess my, my question for you guys is, do you allow people
to be there for you or do you pull away and be very honest

(10:16):
with yourself? Because I'm, I just had that
kind of dawn on me that I was like, oh, I mean, it was so
obvious, obviously, but it just,I'm not going to, I'm now bound
and determined because I it, youknow, when you go through the
stages of grief of sadness, and then it turns into anger later.

(10:39):
Now I'm at the anchor stage where I'm like, no, this is not
happening again. I'm not going to let it happen
again. Regardless of how I feel.
I'm going to show up here, You guys keep me accountable and
regardless how I feel, I'm goingto work on my book.
Doesn't matter. I have a laptop.
I can have it charged if we're going into town and I don't have

(10:59):
time to work on it. If I know I'm not going to have
time to work on it later that evening, I'll bring my laptop
with me and I'll write it right as we're cruising around.
Ask my husband to drive for 1/2 an hour while I work on my book.
Not a not a big deal, actually. Technically I can work on it
from my phone. It's just annoying typing with
your thumbs. But turning that that emotional

(11:26):
pain, let yourself use that anger for something good and
turn it into a positive drive that you're like, I'm not going
to let that do that again. Nope.
I'm going to turn this emotionalpain into something really,
really good and I'm going to keep chasing my dreams and I'm
going to keep going and it doesn't matter.

(11:47):
People can get me down and I canfeel the ick and I can feel the
bad, but it's not going to take me away from my community.
I'm going to let people be therefor me and I'm going to keep
chasing my dreams regardless of how I feel.
I'm going to keep showing up forpeople because you guys always
show up for me. Always.
It's blows me away. If I wasn't so fired up, I

(12:10):
probably would cry right now. I'm really, really fired up
right now. So do you, do you let people be
there for you or do you pull away?
And the lesson that I, like all of us talking to myself here to
take away from all of this is just to allow people to be there

(12:31):
for you because people want to be there for you.
They do. And I know that all of you guys
want to be there for me. So let them let people be there
for you. And I know it's, you know, at
the time I was coping the best way that I knew how at the time

(12:53):
and I did what I could and I was.
So don't get too down on yourself.
You know, if I look back, I could have dealt with that a lot
better. You did what you could at the
time. You dealt with it the best way
you knew how at the time. And that's a good thing.
I didn't get depressed. That's a good thing.
Take the win 'cause now I'm a little bit upset that I missed

(13:18):
on my show. I'm upset that now, you know, I
missed all that time to work on my book.
Because those two things, why they're so important to me, they
really, I love doing them, but they bring me so much
fulfillment and so much joy. And last year, had those

(13:44):
notifications not gone into my spam, and I knew that they were,
you guys were there for me, theyprobably would have made a big,
big difference at the time, but it's making a big difference

(14:04):
now. So yeah, we, we learn from our
mistakes. We do the best that we can.
That leads into the challenge ofthe week for this week is let
your people be there for you. Let your people be there for
you. I need to let my community, you

(14:27):
guys, be there for me and you know it.
You guys were always there even though I was inconsistent.
I'd go in my stats and I'd say, yeah, you guys are still
listening. You're still here.
And as JJ always says to please pause, love yourself, love

(14:49):
yourself, and forgive yourself when you do make mistakes or
could have coped better. Get the best that you could at
the time, did the best that you could at the time, and you're
doing your best now. Love yourself and be aware of
your ripple. We all have a ripple in life.

(15:10):
Let's make it a +1. You guys stay classic, stay you,
stay uniquely you. You guys are the best.
I really, really mean that from the bottom of my heart.
You guys rock. You're the best.
And my website isclassicchronicles.ca.
If you want to head on over there, you can send me an e-mail
or if you want to, you can set up an appointment for a virtual

(15:34):
chat. We can have coffee together over
Zoom. I would love to.
I always love connecting with mylisteners.
So you guys take care and we'll catch you next time.
Bye.