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April 21, 2025 • 9 mins

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
After 30 plus years of teaching leaders how to coach
, I still get the questionwhat's the purpose of coaching?
Why do our leaders need tocoach?
Our people are really, reallybusy and I always think about
that objection of how to handleit because I immediately want to
go to.
It can improve your culture, itcan help leaders, it can help

(00:22):
employees.
Yet when we really think aboutcoaching at its most fundamental
level, let's honestly look at asports analogy.
If you have kids and you usesports, would you honestly go up
to your kid's coach and say myson or daughter only plays games
.
They don't practice, they don'tdo anything to improve.
They have no application.

(00:43):
They have no time forapplication of what you're
teaching them.
They're just going to come andplay.
Now the first immediatereaction of someone hearing
that's going to immediately saywell, sports is different than
the workplace.
What's not different is thefundamentals of how people
improve.
First you need knowledge.
How do I make a good decision?

(01:04):
How do I handle a conversation,a conflict?
Then we need to practice it.
Do we honestly think somebodywho practices conversations at
conflict is going to be lesslikely or less skilled than
someone who never practices suchconversations?
The other day I had a leader askme about decision-making.

(01:27):
I've got an employee who justwon't pull the trigger.
They always come through me,they always want me to make the
decisions and I said do you?
And he said well, yeah.
And I said so, you own it.
They don't you want them to ownit, but you've chosen to own it
.
He said yeah, I have.
And I said so how do youfacilitate practice around
decision-making?
He said what do you mean?
So you know the answer.

(01:48):
He's not doing it and that'sokay.
I said have you thought aboutgiving a weekly case study to
get insight to their criticalthinking skills?
He said, no, that's a greatidea.
Now, great guy, wonderful guy.
And I said I'd like to use thisin my next podcast.
And he was fully aware.
So when he listens to this,I'll get an email.
But I said think about it.
Decision-making is terrifying topeople.

(02:10):
What if I make the wrongdecision?
We all know there's noguarantee of the right decision
every time.
So if you don't practice it,you won't do it.
If you're not skilled orconfident, you probably will
find a way to transfer it tosomebody else like this leader.
So if you have somebody who isdoing public speaking, they have

(02:30):
to give a speech and oh, by theway, the CEO is going to be in
attendance.
Do we honestly think somebodyis going to show up that day,
not write out an outline, notpractice, not know what they're
going to talk about, and justget up there and wing it?
Of course not.
So when we think about coachingat its most fundamental level,

(02:51):
its most fundamental level, sowhen you think about it, we also
have to be very conscientiousof one major fact If coaching is
communication, if leaders arealready talking to their
employees, they're communicatingEmbed coaching.

(03:12):
I hear it all the time.
Well, I have a weekly check-inwith my people.
Doesn't that sound wonderful?
A warm, friendly check-in?
What do we do at check-ins?
And there's nothing wrong witha check-in, by the way, even
though I said that sarcasticallybut a check-in is not coaching.
It's usually an agenda, it'susually a checklist of things

(03:32):
that need to be done or haven'tbeen done or are in the process
of being done.
That is not coaching.
Coaching is about increasingsomeone's knowledge.
It's about facilitatingpractice so they improve their
skills, and using positivereinforcement to build
confidence.
Now, what's the end result tothat?
Talent development, talentretention, easier to recruit to

(03:55):
the organization Now, beforesomebody says, well, wait,
that's the training department'sresponsibility.
Great, if it's the trainingdepartment's responsibility, do
me a favor, have them do the endof the year review, not you as
a leader.
Now, I know I sound crass rightnow.
I know I sound agitated.
I'm not agitated Yet.
Think about it fundamentallyand I'll tell you my opinion.

(04:18):
The number one reason peopledon't want to coach is they
don't know how to do it and theydon't know what to say.
They will come up with everyreason.
I recently had a vice presidentof a wealth management company
said well, this is really simplestuff that you teach.
Now we hadn't gotten to theadvanced stuff.
I said yeah, it's simple stuff.

(04:39):
You want to practice.
And he immediately had a facialexpression change.
He said well, why do you wantto practice?
I said I love to practice, andthe reason I like to practice is
it gives me insight to teachthings.
It gives me insight where Ineed to improve.
And I said, when you say thatit's pretty simple, I guess my
question is do you practice it?

(04:59):
Are you comfortable doing thatright now?
He said well, you know you'renot giving me a lot of time to
prepare, and I said so when anemployee knocks on your door, do
you tell them to go awaybecause you want more time to
prepare?
He said no great point andreally nice guy.
And I said coaching is a skill.
So, fundamentally, if we knowwhat to do, we have knowledge.
If we have skill because wepracticed it, we will become

(05:23):
more confident people.
It's that simple.
I want to give you this analogyand I remember when I was
coaching my son in a communitybasketball league kids are like
eight, nine years old and I hada dad that was so offensive
towards his son and he wouldyell when he would miss free
throws and he would scream athim and he, you know, just

(05:44):
testosterone flying.
This is a rec league, thisisn't even a competitive league.
And all of a sudden I said Iwant to talk to you after the
game.
And the guy goes.
Well, you know, my kid's got topractice.
And you know.
And I said I understand he'sgot to practice, he's eight, he
missed a free throw and youscreamed when he air balled it.

(06:04):
What do you think is goingthrough his mind?
He goes well, I don't care, youknow, I want my kid to learn.
And I said so, you don't care,do me a favor?
Handed him a basketball.
I said come with me.
Went to the free throw line.
I said hold this, stay here.
Turned around, some parents werestill in the gym and I said I

(06:25):
won't use his real name.
And I said Bob's going to showus how to shoot a free throw.
I said go ahead, everybody'swatching you.
And what I did is I flipped thescript.
Basically, I put him on thestage.
His kid was at, by the way, atthe age of eight.
I said by the way, don't youmiss that free throw?
And I mimicked him.
This man was so red he put theball down, walked out of the gym

(06:51):
, never came back again.
Funny thing was this kidstarted to become a pretty good
ball player and I'll neverforget that.
And I said think about it,that's a big stage.
So if you don't practice atthat stage gets really big.
Coaching is a stage.
It's a stage we're already on.
We're already having privateone-on-ones.

(07:12):
We're already havingend-of-the-year reviews.
Think about if you werescheduling your people weekly,
bi-weekly and theend-of-the-year review came,
versus not having those meetings.
Wouldn't the end of the yearreview go better?
Because they have a betterinsight to what their
performance has been like whatyour likes and dislikes?
Are your expectations met andmaybe even not met?

(07:34):
Wouldn't the employee benefit?
Wouldn't that endeavor becomeso much easier?
Coaching is not an in additionto endeavor thing.
Coaching is not an in additionto endeavor thing.
It's an element of what wealready do, and that's
communicate.
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