July 24, 2025 • 39 mins
Satan's playbook against women isn't as hidden as you might think. In this eye-opening conversation with Emily Wilson Hussem, we pull back the curtain on spiritual warfare, and how to fight the subtle tactics the enemy designed to pull us away from intimacy with God.
Scriptures referenced:
- John 10:10
Resources:
About Emily:
Website | Instagram
Emily's favorite Bible: NRSV
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Ellen Krause (00:04):
At the Coffee and Bible Time podcast.
Our goal is to help you delightin God's Word and thrive in
Christian living.
Each week, we talk to subjectmatter experts who broaden your
biblical understanding,encourage you in hard times and
provide life-building tips toenhance your Christian walk.
We are so glad you have joinedus.
(00:25):
Welcome back to the Coffee andBible Time podcast, where our
goal is to help you delight inGod's Word and thrive in
Christian living.
I'm your host, ellen, and todaywe're talking about a topic
that affects all of us asbelievers, and that is how the
(00:46):
enemy works to pull us away fromintimacy with God.
And joining us today to discussthis is Emily Wilson Husem, a
speaker, worship leader, authorand encourager of women.
Her newest book, sincerelyStoneheart, so incredibly
creatively exposes the subtleways the enemy lies to us, and
(01:12):
we'll be using it as a launchingpoint to explore how women
today can resist spiritualattack and walk in truth.
So, emily, welcome to thepodcast and truth.
Emily Wilson Hussem (01:27):
So, emily, welcome to the podcast.
It's a gift to be with all ofyou with you and with all your
listeners out there, whetheryou're in the car at home.
We're so delighted to be withyou today and sharing this
conversation.
Ellen Krause (01:33):
Absolutely Well.
I just want to start out bysaying, emily, that you are so
incredibly self-aware, Thanks,and just such a gifted writer.
You have effectively put intowords what I have felt, what I
have lived, what I have thought,that I didn't even know were
(01:55):
stumbling blocks to myrelationship with God.
Yes, many I did, but the liesare very deceitful.
I did, but you like.
Yeah, the lies are verydeceitful.
So I just hope our listeners,by the end of this conversation,
will also gain greater insightinto the enemy's musings, so
that we can all be on guard andpursue a closer relationship
(02:18):
with God.
Emily Wilson Hussem (02:19):
I hope so too.
Ellen Krause (02:20):
Emily, I just want to start with a verse from John
10.10 that says the thief comesonly to steal and kill and
destroy.
I came that they may have lifeand have it abundantly, says
Jesus.
I just kind of wanted to groundour conversation in that verse.
Knowing that you've writtenthis book from the enemy's
(02:45):
perspective, how has this versesort of shaped your thoughts
going into the writing of thisbook?
Emily Wilson Hussem (02:52):
Yeah, absolutely.
This verse really was thefoundation of writing the whole
book.
I am, you know, I haveself-awareness, but really the
book came out of 14 years ofministry with women.
I've been walking with women onretreats and at conferences and
at events and in teaching for 14years now and I have seen that
(03:14):
all the enemy tries to do everysingle day is steal our peace,
our hope, kill any sort of, youknow, rootedness we have in the
Lord, this destruction of, likeyou said, our intimacy with God.
The enemy wants to destroy allof that and pull us away from
the Lord as much as possible.
So that's what I've seen overthese years is how the enemy has
(03:36):
really worked to destroy women,but how those of us who have
seen in freedom, all of us whohave seen and know the freedom
found in Jesus, this life ofabundance that he's promised us
so many women for all of theseyears that I've talked with and
loved and listened to they arein that place where the enemy is
(03:56):
just stealing all their hope,stealing all their peace.
So I thought let's unpack thisand share about the life of
abundance that's promised us andhow we can really, in our
everyday lives, claim that andlive that and root ourselves in
the life of abundance that Jesuspromised us.
It was the exploration of thatthat brought me to write
Sincerely, stoneheart.
Ellen Krause (04:16):
And I think we're going to get into what some of
these are.
But just having read about someof these in book yesterday,
even I found myself falling intoone of the traps that was in
there within our family dynamicsand I had I was just so glad I
was self aware enough to say, mygoodness, like this is flat out
(04:41):
an attack of the enemy and weare not going to let this
distract us from our goals.
And so well, let's talk alittle bit about understanding
the enemies.
Emily Wilson Hussem (04:52):
Yeah, how did the?
Ellen Krause (04:53):
concept for Sincerely Stoneheart.
Help you think differentlyabout the enemy's strategies.
Emily Wilson Hussem (05:01):
For sure.
So Sincerely Stoneheart is inthe spirit of CS Lewis's the
Screwtape Letters.
You do not have to have readthe Screwtape Letters in order
to understand my book and whatCS Lewis did and he readily
admits that he was not even thefirst one to do this.
He said there was someone whowrote Lies from a Devil hundreds
of years ago.
And really what it did writingfrom a senior demon to a junior
(05:22):
demon, teaching that juniordemon how to destroy women what
the Screwtape Letters did for somany people and what Sincerely
Stoneheart has been doing forwomen since the day that it
published is really like unveil,the way that the enemy works on
us in a way that you know,writing this book, what the
Screwtape Letters did was havepeople reading going aha, I've
(05:45):
fallen for that.
Aha, oh, my goodness, this iswhat's going on in my life.
This is what's at play here.
This isn't just some likehappenstance thing.
This is the enemy subtlyworking on me to pull me away
from God.
So what I've done in SincerelyStoneheart right, looking at the
devil's playbook against womenafter all of these years is
writing out these lies right,and we'll get into many of them
(06:09):
Belovedness, distraction,dissatisfaction, prayer, right.
So many lies, so that writingit in this way of oh my goodness
, this is how the devil works onme.
So women can say, aha, I'venever seen it like this before
my eyes are opened, I can'tunsee what I've seen now in
reading this and reallyunderstanding the way that the
(06:30):
enemy is trying to steal, killand destroy.
And not only that, once we seeit, we can't unsee it, but we
can also make change.
Like you said, you saw in yourown family.
After reading SincerelyStoneheart, you see this dynamic
in your family and you thinknot only am I going to see
what's happening here, I'm goingto do something different and
I'm going to make a change aboutit, because this spirit of
(06:54):
writing really brings light tothe darkness.
Ellen Krause (06:58):
So it's important for us to be spiritually aware,
but not fearful, but discerning.
How do we go about doing?
Emily Wilson Hussem (07:09):
that, yeah, absolutely.
That's really a matter of beingrooted in prayer with the Lord,
right?
We don't live our life like, ohgosh, the enemy's after me at
every turn.
We stand on the truth of theresurrection.
We stand on the promises ofJesus.
We stand on the truth of theresurrection, we stand on the
promises of Jesus.
(07:30):
And when we are vigilant andwhen we are aware of what really
the enemy is trying to do inour hearts and in our families
and in our motherhood and in ourrelationships, whatever life
season you're in, the ways thatthe enemy is trying to get into
those relationships, we don'tlive in fear.
We live in truth and we live invigilance to say how can I
protect my relationships fromthe ways that the enemy is
trying to destroy them?
How can I protect my marriagefrom the ways that the enemy is
(07:52):
going to subtly sneak in?
How can I protect my own heartfrom dissatisfaction and anger
and sin and envy?
It's not a matter of living infear, right?
It's a matter of saying no, no,I'm being watchful and I'm
being, just like you said,discerning about where the Lord
is calling me to make goodchoices.
(08:14):
Protect my own heart, protectmy relationships and make sure
they are rooted in the Lord'sheart and what he wants for me
and all of my relationships inmy life.
Ellen Krause (08:25):
Does that make sense?
It does, it does, and it's very, very important to bring this
to the forefront so that it'salmost like you can immediately
spot these things head on.
So let's talk about.
What are some of these liesthat we commonly believe in?
Your experience and you'veministered to so many women what
(08:46):
are some of the most commonwhispers that the enemy is doing
to women today?
Emily Wilson Hussem (08:51):
yeah, one of the biggest ones, of course,
has to do with identity, ouridentity as beloved of god, our
chosenness and the lord's lovefor us.
So so many women all theseyears I've listened to them and
they really cannot bringthemselves to believe that
they're beloved.
They struggle so much tobelieve that they're loved truly
(09:14):
, unconditionally by God becausethey've been through so much
pain and they've been through somuch heartache and they've
experienced so much conditionallove in their lives, love that
was based on their behavior orhow they looked or their actions
or whatever it was.
So I won't give away too manyspoilers for your readers so
they don't know everything thathappens in the book, but I deal
(09:35):
with belovedness early on in thebook in a letter called Looking
for the Keys.
Each letter has a title like asong and Looking for the Keys.
I really have reflected on thisso much in my own life in those
moments where I struggled tobelieve my belovedness and how
I've watched and watched myselfso much in life strive and look
(09:56):
like looking around franticallyfor my belovedness in awards, in
love from a boyfriend, inaccolades, career, whatever it
is All of these things have beenfrantically trying to find my
identity in and have come upshort every time I talk about it
.
Like you lose your keys andyou're looking for your keys.
(10:18):
Listeners out there, maybe thishas happened to you.
You go for an importantappointment and you realize your
car keys aren't in the rightplace.
I don't know if some of you aremore organized than I am, but I
sometimes can be disorganized.
And you go and you can't findthem and you're looking around
everywhere and you're likethinking, oh my gosh, maybe it's
a winter time.
You're like, oh, is it in mycoat pocket, or this and that?
And you're running aroundbecause you are on this time
(10:40):
crunch and you're like I have tofind the keys and you're
totally panicked.
And that analogy and I bring alot of different analogies that
came up in my heart over thecourse of writing this book that
analogy painted the picture forme of this is the way I've
tried to find my identity in mylife Frantically looking through
every pocket maybe it's here,maybe it's here, maybe it's here
(11:01):
, maybe it's here when thereality is that the keys were in
my back pocket.
You ever look for if yourglasses wear and you're looking
around for your glasses andthey're on your head the whole
entire time Like they were hereall along.
The lie that so many womenbelieve I'm not beloved, I'm not
even lovable, I'm not evenlikable.
So many women believe that lie.
(11:22):
When you're looking around forthe keys you're looking for,
you're on for identity and itwas in your backpack all along.
Jesus has always been there,always ready to tell us who we
are, to speak to us of ourbelovedness and our identity,
and it's not supposed to be afrantic search.
The Lord's love is always there, it's always waiting for us,
(11:43):
and that's, I think, over theseyears, one of the biggest lies
that I've seen women believe.
Because the enemy wants tostrike us at identity.
Because when and many of youknow this when our identity is
rooted in Jesus, it's so muchharder for the enemy to work on
us when we know who we are andwe stand firm in who we are in
(12:03):
Christ.
Oh, my goodness, that gives usa surety, a sureness of the way
we speak, act, the choices thatwe make.
And we are so much harder towork on for the enemy when we
know who we are and whose we arein Jesus.
So I think that thatfoundational aspect is where the
enemy really has tried to workon so many women for so many
(12:25):
years?
Ellen Krause (12:25):
Absolutely, and if we don't have that, we start to
look for it in so many otherplaces, right Like our
appearance, our possessions, ourcompany, all these things and
then we get lost.
Emily Wilson Hussem (12:37):
And so many women are like I'm so lost, I
don't know why I'm lost.
I'm like, well, let's talkabout your identity and go from
there.
You know when our identity isrooted there.
You know where you are on themap.
You're not just like, oh mygosh, I'm totally lost.
You know who you are and whoseyou are Changes everything
everything Absolutely Well.
Ellen Krause (12:58):
Another thing that seems to really get us off
track is comparison and thewhole distraction, shame,
self-doubt, keeping us fromtrusting God fully.
There's kind of a lot manythings wrapped up in there but
how does that impact us?
Emily Wilson Hussem (13:17):
Yeah, absolutely.
Comparison is like whew, it isone of the ways and social media
has made it so much worse, andI think you can speak to your
own experience with comparison.
Everybody has their ownexperiences, but the enemy
really and I saw it as I wrotethis book wants to pit women
(13:37):
against each other.
He wants women to hate eachother because when there is
unity among women, that's theway God designed the world right
For unity and harmony andbeauty and peace.
But the enemy sneaking in todestroy all of this in the fall,
the comparison is what theenemy wants to keep at the
forefront of.
Every friendship between women,every way that women see one
(14:01):
another.
When women are celebrating withone another, the enemy is
losing.
I know that the enemy hatesthat, the comparison that he's
tried to sew of trying to bemore beautiful, trying to be
skinnier or funnier or get abetter report card or be faster,
all of these different areas ofour lives, when we think, man,
I got to be better than her, Igot to do better than her, and
(14:24):
not only that, when a womanwho's more beautiful or who gets
a boyfriend or whatever it is,the enemy really wants us to
hate each other.
He wants us to hate ourselves.
I really believe that, not onlyourselves each other, because
it really fractures ourrelationships and we're not able
to truly love one another.
As women call each other higher, as women celebrate one another
(14:46):
as women, when that hatred ofone another comes out of that
comparison game.
I don't know what yourexperience has been like, ellen,
in comparison in life, maybe inschool, growing up.
What has been your experienceof the way the enemies use
comparison between women?
Ellen Krause (15:04):
Well, I mean, I feel like it's something that
you notice as early as gradeschool.
I will tell you my first thingthat I really remember noticing
and that was in my neighborhoodgrowing up and I was just a very
young girl and my body type isthat I have like this tiny
(15:25):
little pooch like in my abdomen.
I was born that way, I justhave it.
My girls have it now.
But I remember there wasanother girl in the neighborhood
whose stomach was perfectlyflat and at that super young age
thinking gosh, why is it mystomach perfectly flat, like
(15:45):
hers?
Emily Wilson Hussem (15:46):
What's wrong with me and?
Ellen Krause (15:48):
isn't it crazy how it just, even at such a young
age, we're already comparingourselves and thinking what's?
Wrong with us Like no, that'show God made me.
Emily Wilson Hussem (16:00):
It's so sad to think of so many little
girls and I talk about that inthe book too, in the letter
called Take it and Run With it.
So many young women like thatat a young age were like just a
sentence said off the cuff aboutthe way their body looks or
their intelligence or whateverit is, and how those moments are
ones that the enemy will useagainst a woman forever.
(16:22):
Remember what that person said.
Remember what that person said.
Remember what that person saidand, going back to that verse,
it steals and kills and destroysyour peace and your confidence
and all of those things.
And it's amazing and I had to goback to myself as a little girl
too, just like you have here,to see where the enemy started
sneaking in when I was just ateeny, tiny girl, with that
(16:44):
comparison with those thingsthat people say, and you're like
, oh my goodness, this has notbeen just my adult life, this
has been since I was small andit kind of breaks your heart in
a profound way.
But the beauty of that isbringing those moments and those
struggles to healing with theLord.
So thanks for sharing that thatmoment of you as a little girl.
It's such a tender, vulnerablething.
Ellen Krause (17:05):
How about you?
What personal lives have youhad to overcome in your own walk
?
Emily Wilson Hussem (17:12):
For me.
I share about it in the book.
I really struggled as a girlwho loved Jesus.
In college, people were awfulto me.
They were so awful.
This was back between 2000 and2010.
I was in college, at ArizonaState, and I was a girl who
loved the Lord, I loved my faithand people made fun of me.
They called me names behind myback, they would gossip about me
(17:33):
and it was such a struggle, ohmy goodness.
It was so painful because itwasn't like right and many of
you might've had this experienceout there.
It wasn't like I was forcing mylove for Jesus on anyone.
I was just living it in the waythat I wanted to Going to
church on Sundays.
I wasn't going to parties, Iwasn't sleeping around, which
were very common things to do ata quote unquote party school
(17:53):
like Arizona State, and peoplewere awful to me about it.
And there came a time whensomeone sat me down and said you
should probably know whatpeople are saying behind your
back, because it's pretty bad.
And he said nobody wants youaround.
We just don't want you aroundanymore.
And yeah, it was horrible.
It was a really toughexperience, but it shaped me and
(18:14):
it's a beautiful testimony thatI get to share with young
people.
Because I came into a fork inthe road of.
Am I going to keep living myfaith?
Am I going to keep doing this?
Do I even want to be callednames and made fun of and walk
this hard road?
You kind of feel like a salmonswimming upstream when it would
be so much easier for a salmonto just turn around and go the
other way.
But I came to this fork in theroad of.
Do I want to do this?
(18:34):
And the answer was yes.
The answer was looking atscripture and Jesus not saying I
offer you a Tempur-Pedicmattress and a Chick-fil-A
number one.
He says if you want to followme, pick up your cross and
follow me right and in theBeatitudes, right.
When they hate you because ofme, blessed are you.
And so I kept on that path.
(18:55):
But that lie that nobody wantedme around stuck with me.
It still affects me today andthe Lord and I have been on this
amazing healing journey andit's been so beautiful.
But there are times where itstill comes up when I'm at
social gatherings, am I annoyingpeople?
Am I bothering people Like dopeople want me around?
Like those like come up everyonce in a while.
I've healed a lot, but thosethings, as you know, they affect
(19:16):
us so deeply.
Just one thing one person saidand some of you out there
listening you could probablypinpoint right the thing that
someone said.
You're like, oh yeah, haven'tthought about that in a while
and it's affected me a lot.
And the beauty about speakingabout these things is that it
offers us an opportunity to justbe even more healed by the Lord
.
When we say these things outloud and talk about how they've
affected us, it gives them lesspower over us, you know.
Ellen Krause (19:39):
Yes, yes, I completely agree, and I think
that that's really whatSincerely Stoneheart does for
the person who reads it, becauseit allows you to go into a very
real, practical situation inour life.
You're thinking about how thathas impacted a personal example
(20:06):
of this particular thing,enacted like a, you know, a
personal example of thisparticular thing, and then I
think we'll store that in ourminds to be able to say, okay,
comparison's going on right nowI'm going to put an end to it
because I don't want to take apart in that or gossip you talk
about in the book.
Let's jump into technology.
Just a little bit.
how has technology just becomethis double-edged sword and how
(20:31):
is it being used?
To distract us Totally?
Emily Wilson Hussem (20:34):
Well, as you and I both know, technology
can be used for amazing things.
We're having a conversationhere right that I hope, edifies
your listeners and really givesthem something to think about
and pray about.
But technology in and of itselfcan, as we know, be used to
steal, kill and destroy so manyaspects of our lives.
(20:54):
When I started writing the book, I got to thinking about the
worldwide web.
As I unpacked all of this, Ithought web a spider builds a
web to catch prey.
And then I started thinking ohmy goodness, we're all stuck in
this web.
We're all prey to this movementof trying to trap us all in
this web.
We're all trapped in the web.
(21:15):
Walk through an airport on anygiven day.
Is anyone speaking to eachother?
No, I imagine, like flying inthe 1970s, people were having
conversations, talking aboutlife, reading their newspaper,
of course, but the newspaperends.
It's not a black hole.
Once you finish that last wordon the newspaper, you're going
to fold it up and maybe talk tosomeone.
But this web that we're all in?
(21:35):
I thought, oh my goodness,we're all trapped.
The web started at home andthen it is in our pockets and
we're all interconnected in thisweb and the enemy uses it at
every single turn to hisadvantage to distract us,
firstly, from the people infront of us, and that's one of
the things that, oh my goodness,changed my life forever.
After writing SincerelyStoneheart, there's so many
(21:57):
changes I've made in my lifeafter realizing, oh my goodness,
the enemy realized people.
When they feel seen right by aperson in person you're looking
at each other when they feelseen, when they feel heard, when
they feel seen by a person inperson, you're looking at each
other.
When they feel seen, when theyfeel heard, when they feel known
that's God's design they feel asense just of worth and value
as a person.
So how could the enemy sneak inwith this web to make it so
(22:21):
that nobody looks at each otheranymore?
You try to talk to a teenager.
In this day and age it'sterrifying.
They look at you like a deer inthe headlights.
You're like you're talking tome.
Why are you talking to me, what?
And I'm like, oh my gosh, I amso afraid for the future of our
world.
I don't know if you have thatexperience, but when you try to
just talk off the cuff to ateenager there are really many
(22:41):
of them.
Not all of them I won't paintwith too broad of a brush.
Many of them are really thrownoff.
And so the way that the enemytries to distract us just from
connection with one another,from seeing one another, there's
such a huge breakdown, and oneof the biggest ones is in the
family unit distracting peoplefrom one another in a family so
(23:02):
that everybody's on theirscreens all the time.
Nobody has any realconversations, you know, so that
nobody looks at each other ortalks to each other.
That's all like just copingwith life on screens.
And one of the other thingsthat I'll mention is the enemy
using screens to distract usfrom all of our feelings, like
all the ways that we feel andall the things that we're going
(23:24):
through.
And I talk about how the enemywants us to spend our life
running away from our problemsrather than taking them to the
Lord in dedicated prayer.
He wants us to use screens andtechnology as our main coping
mechanism.
I feel sad or I feel angry, soI'm just going to scroll on
Instagram to just hope, likehope, those feelings go away.
(23:45):
And what I talk about in thebook that I've realized in my
own life is that, like youscroll for a little while and
the feelings are still there,like it doesn't make anything go
away.
It doesn't actually help, itjust numbs us, and numbing us to
our deep feelings, the way Goddesigned us to feel deeply and
to have angst and wrestle withthings and things going on in
(24:09):
our lives.
He wants to be there with usand for us to go to him, and the
enemy wants that to be the lastthing that we do.
So all of these distractions inour life the enemy tries to put
at the forefront so that wedon't go to Jesus.
Have you seen that play out inyour own life or in your family,
ellen?
Ellen Krause (24:26):
Oh, my goodness, I sure have.
It's interesting becauseseveral years ago my daughter
worked at a restaurant.
She was like a hostess of avery, very busy restaurant in a
touristy town.
And she came home and she saidMom, it's so sad to see families
sitting at tables out to eat ata dinner and they're all on
(24:48):
their conversations, like yousaid, where you're looking at
people in the eye.
I think it's just it does.
(25:09):
It numbs us from having to haverelationships, it numbs us to
have difficult conversations,perhaps to say how we're feeling
, and so it's a danger for sure,I think, for the family unit
and something that we need totake ownership, I think, of.
Emily Wilson Hussem (25:29):
Totally, totally To change.
And I talk to so many moms orfamilies or even women who are
single to say I feel liketechnology is controlling me and
that I'm not in control of itanymore.
And what I tell them is that ittakes one conscious choice
right For a mom, right in herhome, to look at, okay, how is
this all going?
(25:50):
And if it's not going accordingto you know the way, what God
wants for us, we need to makeconcrete changes and we need to
live out those changes.
If technology is controlling us, we need to get back in control
of technology and do some.
Parents or, you know, peoplehave to make some choices that
people are going to be unhappywith.
Yeah, you bring a basket right.
I totally, totally feel whatyour daughter said.
(26:13):
As a person who is a waitressmyself, nobody looks at each
other.
Bring a basket to the tableright At the dinner, you know,
and everybody puts their phonein the basket and that's it.
So like it might take somegetting used to you to be like,
oh my gosh, gosh, we used tojust look at our screens the
whole time.
It might take some getting usedto, but it's a.
There are worthwhile changes tobe made to take back control of
(26:35):
our use of technology.
Ellen Krause (26:37):
Yeah, you know one thing my husband is actually a
really good conversationalist.
I mean not so much, but weactually have like these little
cards too for the dinner table,and they're so fun because they
ask things that you justwouldn't even think of to get a
conversation started and just tohear another side of what
(27:00):
someone in your family thinksabout something that you never
even would have thought to talkabout.
So I love those little chatpack type card things.
Emily Wilson Hussem (27:08):
I love them too.
I think they're so fabulous.
I love when someone puts themlike on a table at a wedding and
they're just like little thingsfor people to chat about rather
than like, oh, what do you dofor work.
It's like, no, let's just havesome real conversations and
learn about just the people atour table and have fun with it.
I love that there's a lot ofdifferent companies that make
them, but they're such abeautiful little tool for
(27:29):
connecting with one another.
Ellen Krause (27:31):
Yes, yes, absolutely.
Well, there's just one morethat I wanted to talk about that
really hit my heart, and it wasthis need for women to value
their worth based on theirproductivity and their
performance and you talk abouthow it even starts.
so young is the grades that youget, and I definitely could
(27:54):
relate to that.
But the part of it that reallystruck me that I'm going to take
home is the part about prayer.
You know we're talking to God,but he's not sitting right there
.
You're having a one-on-oneconversation, like he's there
spiritually but not physically,and you sort of get this sense.
(28:15):
You describe it just as like isthis a waste of time?
Is this?
I know God, you're there andyou're listening, but it's not
something that you can chuck offyour productivity list and
really think.
You know, I've accomplished alot Now over the years.
I've definitely grown, grown,grown in that and I'm so
(28:35):
grateful for prayer.
I think it's like the closestconnection we have to God and
being able to talk to him.
But I just want to see if maybeyou would expand on that a
little bit.
I thought it was just so.
Emily Wilson Hussem (28:47):
Thank you.
It changed me forever too, anda lot of women who read
Sincerely Stoneheart.
They bring that up as one ofthe most impactful parts of the
whole entire thing in looking atprayer Because, like you
mentioned, I talk about how wego back to when we were small
and how the report card was suchan important part of our lives
and some of you out there everyfamily.
It's a different pressure orstress on the report card, but
(29:10):
many women I've talked to overthe years said oh my goodness,
if I didn't get good grades, Iwas worthless and I got punished
or whatever it was.
And we are taught to orienteverything that we do to this
collection of letters to showhow valuable we are and how
smart we are and how good we are.
Nothing to do with the heart,nothing to do with our gifts,
(29:31):
nothing to do with anything likethat.
It's this set of letters to sayhow smart are you, how hard do
you work Right?
And so as children, we'retaught to believe productivity
is everything.
I have to produce or I'mworthless.
I have to produce or I just I'museless.
So it carries on into our lives, and especially in this culture
(29:52):
of hustle, hustle, hustle, domore, do more, do more.
This lie that was already sowninto many of us when we were
small comes into fruition in ourlives as single women in the
workforce, as mothers rightTaking care of children, as
mothers right, taking care ofchildren, women doing all
different kinds of things in alldifferent seasons of life.
We are taught that you have tocheck something off the to-do
list.
And if you haven't producedsomething, if you haven't made
(30:15):
something what a waste of time,like you said.
So the enemy sneaks in there tosay prayer isn't productive,
prayer is a waste of time.
You could be, look at yourto-do list, look at all these
things.
You could be doing all thesethings.
You could check things off, youcould, you know, make the
dinner or do the things orwhatever, and you'd have
something to show for it.
(30:35):
When you pray, right, you sitwith the Lord, you quote,
unquote have nothing to show forit, and the enemy wants us to
be like oh yeah, okay, thenprayer is going to be plan V on
my list, after plan A, b, c, d,e, f, g, h, a, j, k, l, m, o, p,
and so you just never getaround to it because it's not
seen as something productive.
(30:56):
If I knit a sweater, I can holda sweater, I have it there.
But prayer changes us internallyThings that we cannot see and
the enemy, boy oh boy, wants usto believe.
What a waste, so that we neverdo it when it is the most
important work we can do.
It is the central, essentialpart of the wellspring of
(31:19):
everything that all the rest ofthe productive things that we
can do can come forth from thatplace with more peace and with
more joy and with more hope thatwe receive in being rooted in
prayer with the Lord.
Realizing that and talking withso many women who that line
right, that that line of youknow that I talk about
productivity in the book.
You think man, oh man, I havefallen for that lie too many
(31:42):
times and I need to make achange.
Yeah, like I book, you thinkman, oh man, I have fallen for
that lie too many times and Ineed to make a change.
Ellen Krause (31:46):
Yeah, like I said you, putting the words to it and
thinking about it, I feel likeit takes this heavy weight off
and says, no, that's not true.
This is one of the mostvaluable uses of my time is
building my relationship withthe Lord.
So thank you for just how youso eloquently put that together.
(32:08):
And, emily, as we start to wrapthings up here, I know we could
talk about all 42 of theletters.
They're just amazing, but whatwould you say is just a final
word of encouragement to womenbattling spiritual lies?
Emily Wilson Hussem (32:23):
Yeah, god wants freedom for you and I
think that can be such a tritething.
Sometimes you could put it on atote bag and be like, oh yeah,
the Lord wants freedom for me.
But I mean that on the deepestlevel, in that he wants you to
wake up in the morning believingthe truth.
He wants you to put your feeton the floor, believing the
truth.
When those lies come in right,like you said, you want to stop
(32:46):
it as quickly as possible, allof those ways that the enemy
tries to destroy you in life.
The Lord wants you to be freeto say I'm not going to gossip,
I'm not going to choose this sin, you know, and of course, the
Christian life is easier saidthan done.
But the Lord wants you to befree from those lies.
He wants to set you free fromthose insane things that people
(33:10):
have said to you over your life.
He wants to speak truth intothose and it only comes through
going back to him again andagain and again and again.
We think of all the people whowent out to meet Jesus.
I love the hemorrhaging woman,right, she could have been
hopeless.
She could have stayed at homeand been like I have spent all
I've had.
It's not worth it.
But she goes to find the Lord,she goes to seek him, she
(33:31):
reaches out to him.
Then he sets her free from thisailment.
The Lord wants us to continueto seek him and continue to live
in that freedom, because itchanges everything.
Ellen Krause (33:42):
Absolutely Wow.
What a great way to leave aword of encouragement for our
listeners out there that onceyou are aware of what so many of
these things are, it gives youthe opportunity to be free of
that and take action like we'vetalked about Emily.
Where can listeners connectwith you and get your book?
(34:05):
Sincerely Stoneheart.
Emily Wilson Hussem (34:07):
Yeah, absolutely so.
My book Sincerely Stoneheart isavailable wherever books are
sold.
It's available on Amazon.
I have a group discussion guidethat's totally free.
That's available on my website,emilywilsonministriescom, under
my books.
You can find that there.
Women have been walking throughthis all over the world and it's
so beautiful because it startedso many real conversations that
(34:29):
really you know so often wewould never talk about most of
these things with other people,but the group discussion guide,
I hope can, you know, provide aspringboard for you to have
conversations with the women inyour life, whether that's your
mom, whether that's your Biblestudy and whether that's your
small group at your church, toreally share in your hearts
together.
(34:49):
So again, that's available atemilywilsonministriescom under
my books and, since you haven'tshown her, amazon, barnes Noble,
wherever you get a book.
Lots of Christian gift shopshave it and I would love for you
to pick up a copy and you canconnect with me online.
I'm over on Instagram trying toedify the world rather than
distract.
Give you know wonderfulencouragement for the journey.
(35:10):
So I'm just grateful for whatyou do in this world Coffee and
Bible Time.
What an edifying ministry forso many women around the world.
Ellen Krause (35:19):
Thank you, Emily.
I appreciate that so much.
Before I let you go, though, Ihave to ask you a couple of our
favorite questions for ourguests.
What is your go-to Bible andwhat translation is it?
Emily Wilson Hussem (35:30):
Yes, I have a big old Bible with a hard
blue cover.
I should have brought it toshow you.
The translation is RSV, revisedStandard Version, and it's got
big old journaling.
It's a journaling Bible and Iknow you guys are into that.
It's you know.
It's one of those ones whereyou had to find the right pens
in order for it to not leakthrough.
But I just love highlightingand writing and writing on the
(35:53):
sides and writing whateverprayers are on my heart to the
Lord, so I love that it has that, you know, area on the sides
for me to be able to do that.
Ellen Krause (36:01):
So do tell then your favorite journaling pens
are.
Emily Wilson Hussem (36:04):
Oh gosh, I don't know the brand.
I know this, but this is notsomething I know.
I bought them a while back whenI got the Bible, and I've just
been using them ever since, soI'm sorry that I'm not a good
resource on that.
Ellen Krause (36:16):
No worries.
Well, I just thank you so much,emily, for being here, for
sharing your heart, for saying,bringing to life things that so
many of us have thought of, butgiving us an opportunity to see
them for what they are and toprevent them from distracting us
(36:36):
from the truth of God's lovefor us.
So, thank you so much.
Emily Wilson Hussem (36:39):
Oh, it's been such a gift.
I am, you know, just along withyou on the journey.
You and I are in this together,along with all the listeners,
so thank you to all of you forjust sharing in this
conversation today.
Ellen Krause (36:50):
Well, if today's conversation stirred something
in you, please share it with afriend, and don't forget to
check out our community andresources at
coffeeandbibletimecom.
Until next time, keepdelighting in God's word.
At the Coffee and Bible Time podcast.
Our goal is to help you delightin God's Word and thrive in
Christian living.
Each week, we talk to subjectmatter experts who broaden your
biblical understanding,encourage you in hard times and
provide life-building tips toenhance your Christian walk.
We are so glad you have joinedus.
(00:25):
Welcome back to the Coffee andBible Time podcast, where our
goal is to help you delight inGod's Word and thrive in
Christian living.
I'm your host, ellen, and todaywe're talking about a topic
that affects all of us asbelievers, and that is how the
(00:46):
enemy works to pull us away fromintimacy with God.
And joining us today to discussthis is Emily Wilson Husem, a
speaker, worship leader, authorand encourager of women.
Her newest book, sincerelyStoneheart, so incredibly
creatively exposes the subtleways the enemy lies to us, and
(01:12):
we'll be using it as a launchingpoint to explore how women
today can resist spiritualattack and walk in truth.
So, emily, welcome to thepodcast and truth.
Emily Wilson Hussem (01:27):
So, emily, welcome to the podcast.
It's a gift to be with all ofyou with you and with all your
listeners out there, whetheryou're in the car at home.
We're so delighted to be withyou today and sharing this
conversation.
Ellen Krause (01:33):
Absolutely Well.
I just want to start out bysaying, emily, that you are so
incredibly self-aware, Thanks,and just such a gifted writer.
You have effectively put intowords what I have felt, what I
have lived, what I have thought,that I didn't even know were
(01:55):
stumbling blocks to myrelationship with God.
Yes, many I did, but the liesare very deceitful.
I did, but you like.
Yeah, the lies are verydeceitful.
So I just hope our listeners,by the end of this conversation,
will also gain greater insightinto the enemy's musings, so
that we can all be on guard andpursue a closer relationship
(02:18):
with God.
Emily Wilson Hussem (02:19):
I hope so too.
Ellen Krause (02:20):
Emily, I just want to start with a verse from John
10.10 that says the thief comesonly to steal and kill and
destroy.
I came that they may have lifeand have it abundantly, says
Jesus.
I just kind of wanted to groundour conversation in that verse.
Knowing that you've writtenthis book from the enemy's
(02:45):
perspective, how has this versesort of shaped your thoughts
going into the writing of thisbook?
Emily Wilson Hussem (02:52):
Yeah, absolutely.
This verse really was thefoundation of writing the whole
book.
I am, you know, I haveself-awareness, but really the
book came out of 14 years ofministry with women.
I've been walking with women onretreats and at conferences and
at events and in teaching for 14years now and I have seen that
(03:14):
all the enemy tries to do everysingle day is steal our peace,
our hope, kill any sort of, youknow, rootedness we have in the
Lord, this destruction of, likeyou said, our intimacy with God.
The enemy wants to destroy allof that and pull us away from
the Lord as much as possible.
So that's what I've seen overthese years is how the enemy has
(03:36):
really worked to destroy women,but how those of us who have
seen in freedom, all of us whohave seen and know the freedom
found in Jesus, this life ofabundance that he's promised us
so many women for all of theseyears that I've talked with and
loved and listened to they arein that place where the enemy is
(03:56):
just stealing all their hope,stealing all their peace.
So I thought let's unpack thisand share about the life of
abundance that's promised us andhow we can really, in our
everyday lives, claim that andlive that and root ourselves in
the life of abundance that Jesuspromised us.
It was the exploration of thatthat brought me to write
Sincerely, stoneheart.
Ellen Krause (04:16):
And I think we're going to get into what some of
these are.
But just having read about someof these in book yesterday,
even I found myself falling intoone of the traps that was in
there within our family dynamicsand I had I was just so glad I
was self aware enough to say, mygoodness, like this is flat out
(04:41):
an attack of the enemy and weare not going to let this
distract us from our goals.
And so well, let's talk alittle bit about understanding
the enemies.
Emily Wilson Hussem (04:52):
Yeah, how did the?
Ellen Krause (04:53):
concept for Sincerely Stoneheart.
Help you think differentlyabout the enemy's strategies.
Emily Wilson Hussem (05:01):
For sure.
So Sincerely Stoneheart is inthe spirit of CS Lewis's the
Screwtape Letters.
You do not have to have readthe Screwtape Letters in order
to understand my book and whatCS Lewis did and he readily
admits that he was not even thefirst one to do this.
He said there was someone whowrote Lies from a Devil hundreds
of years ago.
And really what it did writingfrom a senior demon to a junior
(05:22):
demon, teaching that juniordemon how to destroy women what
the Screwtape Letters did for somany people and what Sincerely
Stoneheart has been doing forwomen since the day that it
published is really like unveil,the way that the enemy works on
us in a way that you know,writing this book, what the
Screwtape Letters did was havepeople reading going aha, I've
(05:45):
fallen for that.
Aha, oh, my goodness, this iswhat's going on in my life.
This is what's at play here.
This isn't just some likehappenstance thing.
This is the enemy subtlyworking on me to pull me away
from God.
So what I've done in SincerelyStoneheart right, looking at the
devil's playbook against womenafter all of these years is
writing out these lies right,and we'll get into many of them
(06:09):
Belovedness, distraction,dissatisfaction, prayer, right.
So many lies, so that writingit in this way of oh my goodness
, this is how the devil works onme.
So women can say, aha, I'venever seen it like this before
my eyes are opened, I can'tunsee what I've seen now in
reading this and reallyunderstanding the way that the
(06:30):
enemy is trying to steal, killand destroy.
And not only that, once we seeit, we can't unsee it, but we
can also make change.
Like you said, you saw in yourown family.
After reading SincerelyStoneheart, you see this dynamic
in your family and you thinknot only am I going to see
what's happening here, I'm goingto do something different and
I'm going to make a change aboutit, because this spirit of
(06:54):
writing really brings light tothe darkness.
Ellen Krause (06:58):
So it's important for us to be spiritually aware,
but not fearful, but discerning.
How do we go about doing?
Emily Wilson Hussem (07:09):
that, yeah, absolutely.
That's really a matter of beingrooted in prayer with the Lord,
right?
We don't live our life like, ohgosh, the enemy's after me at
every turn.
We stand on the truth of theresurrection.
We stand on the promises ofJesus.
We stand on the truth of theresurrection, we stand on the
promises of Jesus.
(07:30):
And when we are vigilant andwhen we are aware of what really
the enemy is trying to do inour hearts and in our families
and in our motherhood and in ourrelationships, whatever life
season you're in, the ways thatthe enemy is trying to get into
those relationships, we don'tlive in fear.
We live in truth and we live invigilance to say how can I
protect my relationships fromthe ways that the enemy is
trying to destroy them?
How can I protect my marriagefrom the ways that the enemy is
(07:52):
going to subtly sneak in?
How can I protect my own heartfrom dissatisfaction and anger
and sin and envy?
It's not a matter of living infear, right?
It's a matter of saying no, no,I'm being watchful and I'm
being, just like you said,discerning about where the Lord
is calling me to make goodchoices.
(08:14):
Protect my own heart, protectmy relationships and make sure
they are rooted in the Lord'sheart and what he wants for me
and all of my relationships inmy life.
Ellen Krause (08:25):
Does that make sense?
It does, it does, and it's very, very important to bring this
to the forefront so that it'salmost like you can immediately
spot these things head on.
So let's talk about.
What are some of these liesthat we commonly believe in?
Your experience and you'veministered to so many women what
(08:46):
are some of the most commonwhispers that the enemy is doing
to women today?
Emily Wilson Hussem (08:51):
yeah, one of the biggest ones, of course,
has to do with identity, ouridentity as beloved of god, our
chosenness and the lord's lovefor us.
So so many women all theseyears I've listened to them and
they really cannot bringthemselves to believe that
they're beloved.
They struggle so much tobelieve that they're loved truly
(09:14):
, unconditionally by God becausethey've been through so much
pain and they've been through somuch heartache and they've
experienced so much conditionallove in their lives, love that
was based on their behavior orhow they looked or their actions
or whatever it was.
So I won't give away too manyspoilers for your readers so
they don't know everything thathappens in the book, but I deal
(09:35):
with belovedness early on in thebook in a letter called Looking
for the Keys.
Each letter has a title like asong and Looking for the Keys.
I really have reflected on thisso much in my own life in those
moments where I struggled tobelieve my belovedness and how
I've watched and watched myselfso much in life strive and look
(09:56):
like looking around franticallyfor my belovedness in awards, in
love from a boyfriend, inaccolades, career, whatever it
is All of these things have beenfrantically trying to find my
identity in and have come upshort every time I talk about it
.
Like you lose your keys andyou're looking for your keys.
(10:18):
Listeners out there, maybe thishas happened to you.
You go for an importantappointment and you realize your
car keys aren't in the rightplace.
I don't know if some of you aremore organized than I am, but I
sometimes can be disorganized.
And you go and you can't findthem and you're looking around
everywhere and you're likethinking, oh my gosh, maybe it's
a winter time.
You're like, oh, is it in mycoat pocket, or this and that?
And you're running aroundbecause you are on this time
(10:40):
crunch and you're like I have tofind the keys and you're
totally panicked.
And that analogy and I bring alot of different analogies that
came up in my heart over thecourse of writing this book that
analogy painted the picture forme of this is the way I've
tried to find my identity in mylife Frantically looking through
every pocket maybe it's here,maybe it's here, maybe it's here
(11:01):
, maybe it's here when thereality is that the keys were in
my back pocket.
You ever look for if yourglasses wear and you're looking
around for your glasses andthey're on your head the whole
entire time Like they were hereall along.
The lie that so many womenbelieve I'm not beloved, I'm not
even lovable, I'm not evenlikable.
So many women believe that lie.
(11:22):
When you're looking around forthe keys you're looking for,
you're on for identity and itwas in your backpack all along.
Jesus has always been there,always ready to tell us who we
are, to speak to us of ourbelovedness and our identity,
and it's not supposed to be afrantic search.
The Lord's love is always there, it's always waiting for us,
(11:43):
and that's, I think, over theseyears, one of the biggest lies
that I've seen women believe.
Because the enemy wants tostrike us at identity.
Because when and many of youknow this when our identity is
rooted in Jesus, it's so muchharder for the enemy to work on
us when we know who we are andwe stand firm in who we are in
(12:03):
Christ.
Oh, my goodness, that gives usa surety, a sureness of the way
we speak, act, the choices thatwe make.
And we are so much harder towork on for the enemy when we
know who we are and whose we arein Jesus.
So I think that thatfoundational aspect is where the
enemy really has tried to workon so many women for so many
(12:25):
years?
Ellen Krause (12:25):
Absolutely, and if we don't have that, we start to
look for it in so many otherplaces, right Like our
appearance, our possessions, ourcompany, all these things and
then we get lost.
Emily Wilson Hussem (12:37):
And so many women are like I'm so lost, I
don't know why I'm lost.
I'm like, well, let's talkabout your identity and go from
there.
You know when our identity isrooted there.
You know where you are on themap.
You're not just like, oh mygosh, I'm totally lost.
You know who you are and whoseyou are Changes everything
everything Absolutely Well.
Ellen Krause (12:58):
Another thing that seems to really get us off
track is comparison and thewhole distraction, shame,
self-doubt, keeping us fromtrusting God fully.
There's kind of a lot manythings wrapped up in there but
how does that impact us?
Emily Wilson Hussem (13:17):
Yeah, absolutely.
Comparison is like whew, it isone of the ways and social media
has made it so much worse, andI think you can speak to your
own experience with comparison.
Everybody has their ownexperiences, but the enemy
really and I saw it as I wrotethis book wants to pit women
(13:37):
against each other.
He wants women to hate eachother because when there is
unity among women, that's theway God designed the world right
For unity and harmony andbeauty and peace.
But the enemy sneaking in todestroy all of this in the fall,
the comparison is what theenemy wants to keep at the
forefront of.
Every friendship between women,every way that women see one
(14:01):
another.
When women are celebrating withone another, the enemy is
losing.
I know that the enemy hatesthat, the comparison that he's
tried to sew of trying to bemore beautiful, trying to be
skinnier or funnier or get abetter report card or be faster,
all of these different areas ofour lives, when we think, man,
I got to be better than her, Igot to do better than her, and
(14:24):
not only that, when a womanwho's more beautiful or who gets
a boyfriend or whatever it is,the enemy really wants us to
hate each other.
He wants us to hate ourselves.
I really believe that, not onlyourselves each other, because
it really fractures ourrelationships and we're not able
to truly love one another.
As women call each other higher, as women celebrate one another
(14:46):
as women, when that hatred ofone another comes out of that
comparison game.
I don't know what yourexperience has been like, ellen,
in comparison in life, maybe inschool, growing up.
What has been your experienceof the way the enemies use
comparison between women?
Ellen Krause (15:04):
Well, I mean, I feel like it's something that
you notice as early as gradeschool.
I will tell you my first thingthat I really remember noticing
and that was in my neighborhoodgrowing up and I was just a very
young girl and my body type isthat I have like this tiny
(15:25):
little pooch like in my abdomen.
I was born that way, I justhave it.
My girls have it now.
But I remember there wasanother girl in the neighborhood
whose stomach was perfectlyflat and at that super young age
thinking gosh, why is it mystomach perfectly flat, like
(15:45):
hers?
Emily Wilson Hussem (15:46):
What's wrong with me and?
Ellen Krause (15:48):
isn't it crazy how it just, even at such a young
age, we're already comparingourselves and thinking what's?
Wrong with us Like no, that'show God made me.
Emily Wilson Hussem (16:00):
It's so sad to think of so many little
girls and I talk about that inthe book too, in the letter
called Take it and Run With it.
So many young women like thatat a young age were like just a
sentence said off the cuff aboutthe way their body looks or
their intelligence or whateverit is, and how those moments are
ones that the enemy will useagainst a woman forever.
(16:22):
Remember what that person said.
Remember what that person said.
Remember what that person saidand, going back to that verse,
it steals and kills and destroysyour peace and your confidence
and all of those things.
And it's amazing and I had to goback to myself as a little girl
too, just like you have here,to see where the enemy started
sneaking in when I was just ateeny, tiny girl, with that
(16:44):
comparison with those thingsthat people say, and you're like
, oh my goodness, this has notbeen just my adult life, this
has been since I was small andit kind of breaks your heart in
a profound way.
But the beauty of that isbringing those moments and those
struggles to healing with theLord.
So thanks for sharing that thatmoment of you as a little girl.
It's such a tender, vulnerablething.
Ellen Krause (17:05):
How about you?
What personal lives have youhad to overcome in your own walk
?
Emily Wilson Hussem (17:12):
For me.
I share about it in the book.
I really struggled as a girlwho loved Jesus.
In college, people were awfulto me.
They were so awful.
This was back between 2000 and2010.
I was in college, at ArizonaState, and I was a girl who
loved the Lord, I loved my faithand people made fun of me.
They called me names behind myback, they would gossip about me
(17:33):
and it was such a struggle, ohmy goodness.
It was so painful because itwasn't like right and many of
you might've had this experienceout there.
It wasn't like I was forcing mylove for Jesus on anyone.
I was just living it in the waythat I wanted to Going to
church on Sundays.
I wasn't going to parties, Iwasn't sleeping around, which
were very common things to do ata quote unquote party school
(17:53):
like Arizona State, and peoplewere awful to me about it.
And there came a time whensomeone sat me down and said you
should probably know whatpeople are saying behind your
back, because it's pretty bad.
And he said nobody wants youaround.
We just don't want you aroundanymore.
And yeah, it was horrible.
It was a really toughexperience, but it shaped me and
(18:14):
it's a beautiful testimony thatI get to share with young
people.
Because I came into a fork inthe road of.
Am I going to keep living myfaith?
Am I going to keep doing this?
Do I even want to be callednames and made fun of and walk
this hard road?
You kind of feel like a salmonswimming upstream when it would
be so much easier for a salmonto just turn around and go the
other way.
But I came to this fork in theroad of.
Do I want to do this?
(18:34):
And the answer was yes.
The answer was looking atscripture and Jesus not saying I
offer you a Tempur-Pedicmattress and a Chick-fil-A
number one.
He says if you want to followme, pick up your cross and
follow me right and in theBeatitudes, right.
When they hate you because ofme, blessed are you.
And so I kept on that path.
(18:55):
But that lie that nobody wantedme around stuck with me.
It still affects me today andthe Lord and I have been on this
amazing healing journey andit's been so beautiful.
But there are times where itstill comes up when I'm at
social gatherings, am I annoyingpeople?
Am I bothering people Like dopeople want me around?
Like those like come up everyonce in a while.
I've healed a lot, but thosethings, as you know, they affect
(19:16):
us so deeply.
Just one thing one person saidand some of you out there
listening you could probablypinpoint right the thing that
someone said.
You're like, oh yeah, haven'tthought about that in a while
and it's affected me a lot.
And the beauty about speakingabout these things is that it
offers us an opportunity to justbe even more healed by the Lord
.
When we say these things outloud and talk about how they've
affected us, it gives them lesspower over us, you know.
Ellen Krause (19:39):
Yes, yes, I completely agree, and I think
that that's really whatSincerely Stoneheart does for
the person who reads it, becauseit allows you to go into a very
real, practical situation inour life.
You're thinking about how thathas impacted a personal example
(20:06):
of this particular thing,enacted like a, you know, a
personal example of thisparticular thing, and then I
think we'll store that in ourminds to be able to say, okay,
comparison's going on right nowI'm going to put an end to it
because I don't want to take apart in that or gossip you talk
about in the book.
Let's jump into technology.
Just a little bit.
how has technology just becomethis double-edged sword and how
(20:31):
is it being used?
To distract us Totally?
Emily Wilson Hussem (20:34):
Well, as you and I both know, technology
can be used for amazing things.
We're having a conversationhere right that I hope, edifies
your listeners and really givesthem something to think about
and pray about.
But technology in and of itselfcan, as we know, be used to
steal, kill and destroy so manyaspects of our lives.
(20:54):
When I started writing the book, I got to thinking about the
worldwide web.
As I unpacked all of this, Ithought web a spider builds a
web to catch prey.
And then I started thinking ohmy goodness, we're all stuck in
this web.
We're all prey to this movementof trying to trap us all in
this web.
We're all trapped in the web.
(21:15):
Walk through an airport on anygiven day.
Is anyone speaking to eachother?
No, I imagine, like flying inthe 1970s, people were having
conversations, talking aboutlife, reading their newspaper,
of course, but the newspaperends.
It's not a black hole.
Once you finish that last wordon the newspaper, you're going
to fold it up and maybe talk tosomeone.
But this web that we're all in?
(21:35):
I thought, oh my goodness,we're all trapped.
The web started at home andthen it is in our pockets and
we're all interconnected in thisweb and the enemy uses it at
every single turn to hisadvantage to distract us,
firstly, from the people infront of us, and that's one of
the things that, oh my goodness,changed my life forever.
After writing SincerelyStoneheart, there's so many
(21:57):
changes I've made in my lifeafter realizing, oh my goodness,
the enemy realized people.
When they feel seen right by aperson in person you're looking
at each other when they feelseen, when they feel heard, when
they feel seen by a person inperson, you're looking at each
other.
When they feel seen, when theyfeel heard, when they feel known
that's God's design they feel asense just of worth and value
as a person.
So how could the enemy sneak inwith this web to make it so
(22:21):
that nobody looks at each otheranymore?
You try to talk to a teenager.
In this day and age it'sterrifying.
They look at you like a deer inthe headlights.
You're like you're talking tome.
Why are you talking to me, what?
And I'm like, oh my gosh, I amso afraid for the future of our
world.
I don't know if you have thatexperience, but when you try to
just talk off the cuff to ateenager there are really many
(22:41):
of them.
Not all of them I won't paintwith too broad of a brush.
Many of them are really thrownoff.
And so the way that the enemytries to distract us just from
connection with one another,from seeing one another, there's
such a huge breakdown, and oneof the biggest ones is in the
family unit distracting peoplefrom one another in a family so
(23:02):
that everybody's on theirscreens all the time.
Nobody has any realconversations, you know, so that
nobody looks at each other ortalks to each other.
That's all like just copingwith life on screens.
And one of the other thingsthat I'll mention is the enemy
using screens to distract usfrom all of our feelings, like
all the ways that we feel andall the things that we're going
(23:24):
through.
And I talk about how the enemywants us to spend our life
running away from our problemsrather than taking them to the
Lord in dedicated prayer.
He wants us to use screens andtechnology as our main coping
mechanism.
I feel sad or I feel angry, soI'm just going to scroll on
Instagram to just hope, likehope, those feelings go away.
(23:45):
And what I talk about in thebook that I've realized in my
own life is that, like youscroll for a little while and
the feelings are still there,like it doesn't make anything go
away.
It doesn't actually help, itjust numbs us, and numbing us to
our deep feelings, the way Goddesigned us to feel deeply and
to have angst and wrestle withthings and things going on in
(24:09):
our lives.
He wants to be there with usand for us to go to him, and the
enemy wants that to be the lastthing that we do.
So all of these distractions inour life the enemy tries to put
at the forefront so that wedon't go to Jesus.
Have you seen that play out inyour own life or in your family,
ellen?
Ellen Krause (24:26):
Oh, my goodness, I sure have.
It's interesting becauseseveral years ago my daughter
worked at a restaurant.
She was like a hostess of avery, very busy restaurant in a
touristy town.
And she came home and she saidMom, it's so sad to see families
sitting at tables out to eat ata dinner and they're all on
(24:48):
their conversations, like yousaid, where you're looking at
people in the eye.
I think it's just it does.
(25:09):
It numbs us from having to haverelationships, it numbs us to
have difficult conversations,perhaps to say how we're feeling
, and so it's a danger for sure,I think, for the family unit
and something that we need totake ownership, I think, of.
Emily Wilson Hussem (25:29):
Totally, totally To change.
And I talk to so many moms orfamilies or even women who are
single to say I feel liketechnology is controlling me and
that I'm not in control of itanymore.
And what I tell them is that ittakes one conscious choice
right For a mom, right in herhome, to look at, okay, how is
this all going?
(25:50):
And if it's not going accordingto you know the way, what God
wants for us, we need to makeconcrete changes and we need to
live out those changes.
If technology is controlling us, we need to get back in control
of technology and do some.
Parents or, you know, peoplehave to make some choices that
people are going to be unhappywith.
Yeah, you bring a basket right.
I totally, totally feel whatyour daughter said.
(26:13):
As a person who is a waitressmyself, nobody looks at each
other.
Bring a basket to the tableright At the dinner, you know,
and everybody puts their phonein the basket and that's it.
So like it might take somegetting used to you to be like,
oh my gosh, gosh, we used tojust look at our screens the
whole time.
It might take some getting usedto, but it's a.
There are worthwhile changes tobe made to take back control of
(26:35):
our use of technology.
Ellen Krause (26:37):
Yeah, you know one thing my husband is actually a
really good conversationalist.
I mean not so much, but weactually have like these little
cards too for the dinner table,and they're so fun because they
ask things that you justwouldn't even think of to get a
conversation started and just tohear another side of what
(27:00):
someone in your family thinksabout something that you never
even would have thought to talkabout.
So I love those little chatpack type card things.
Emily Wilson Hussem (27:08):
I love them too.
I think they're so fabulous.
I love when someone puts themlike on a table at a wedding and
they're just like little thingsfor people to chat about rather
than like, oh, what do you dofor work.
It's like, no, let's just havesome real conversations and
learn about just the people atour table and have fun with it.
I love that there's a lot ofdifferent companies that make
them, but they're such abeautiful little tool for
(27:29):
connecting with one another.
Ellen Krause (27:31):
Yes, yes, absolutely.
Well, there's just one morethat I wanted to talk about that
really hit my heart, and it wasthis need for women to value
their worth based on theirproductivity and their
performance and you talk abouthow it even starts.
so young is the grades that youget, and I definitely could
(27:54):
relate to that.
But the part of it that reallystruck me that I'm going to take
home is the part about prayer.
You know we're talking to God,but he's not sitting right there
.
You're having a one-on-oneconversation, like he's there
spiritually but not physically,and you sort of get this sense.
(28:15):
You describe it just as like isthis a waste of time?
Is this?
I know God, you're there andyou're listening, but it's not
something that you can chuck offyour productivity list and
really think.
You know, I've accomplished alot Now over the years.
I've definitely grown, grown,grown in that and I'm so
(28:35):
grateful for prayer.
I think it's like the closestconnection we have to God and
being able to talk to him.
But I just want to see if maybeyou would expand on that a
little bit.
I thought it was just so.
Emily Wilson Hussem (28:47):
Thank you.
It changed me forever too, anda lot of women who read
Sincerely Stoneheart.
They bring that up as one ofthe most impactful parts of the
whole entire thing in looking atprayer Because, like you
mentioned, I talk about how wego back to when we were small
and how the report card was suchan important part of our lives
and some of you out there everyfamily.
It's a different pressure orstress on the report card, but
(29:10):
many women I've talked to overthe years said oh my goodness,
if I didn't get good grades, Iwas worthless and I got punished
or whatever it was.
And we are taught to orienteverything that we do to this
collection of letters to showhow valuable we are and how
smart we are and how good we are.
Nothing to do with the heart,nothing to do with our gifts,
(29:31):
nothing to do with anything likethat.
It's this set of letters to sayhow smart are you, how hard do
you work Right?
And so as children, we'retaught to believe productivity
is everything.
I have to produce or I'mworthless.
I have to produce or I just I'museless.
So it carries on into our lives, and especially in this culture
(29:52):
of hustle, hustle, hustle, domore, do more, do more.
This lie that was already sowninto many of us when we were
small comes into fruition in ourlives as single women in the
workforce, as mothers rightTaking care of children, as
mothers right, taking care ofchildren, women doing all
different kinds of things in alldifferent seasons of life.
We are taught that you have tocheck something off the to-do
list.
And if you haven't producedsomething, if you haven't made
(30:15):
something what a waste of time,like you said.
So the enemy sneaks in there tosay prayer isn't productive,
prayer is a waste of time.
You could be, look at yourto-do list, look at all these
things.
You could be doing all thesethings.
You could check things off, youcould, you know, make the
dinner or do the things orwhatever, and you'd have
something to show for it.
(30:35):
When you pray, right, you sitwith the Lord, you quote,
unquote have nothing to show forit, and the enemy wants us to
be like oh yeah, okay, thenprayer is going to be plan V on
my list, after plan A, b, c, d,e, f, g, h, a, j, k, l, m, o, p,
and so you just never getaround to it because it's not
seen as something productive.
(30:56):
If I knit a sweater, I can holda sweater, I have it there.
But prayer changes us internallyThings that we cannot see and
the enemy, boy oh boy, wants usto believe.
What a waste, so that we neverdo it when it is the most
important work we can do.
It is the central, essentialpart of the wellspring of
(31:19):
everything that all the rest ofthe productive things that we
can do can come forth from thatplace with more peace and with
more joy and with more hope thatwe receive in being rooted in
prayer with the Lord.
Realizing that and talking withso many women who that line
right, that that line of youknow that I talk about
productivity in the book.
You think man, oh man, I havefallen for that lie too many
(31:42):
times and I need to make achange.
Yeah, like I book, you thinkman, oh man, I have fallen for
that lie too many times and Ineed to make a change.
Ellen Krause (31:46):
Yeah, like I said you, putting the words to it and
thinking about it, I feel likeit takes this heavy weight off
and says, no, that's not true.
This is one of the mostvaluable uses of my time is
building my relationship withthe Lord.
So thank you for just how youso eloquently put that together.
(32:08):
And, emily, as we start to wrapthings up here, I know we could
talk about all 42 of theletters.
They're just amazing, but whatwould you say is just a final
word of encouragement to womenbattling spiritual lies?
Emily Wilson Hussem (32:23):
Yeah, god wants freedom for you and I
think that can be such a tritething.
Sometimes you could put it on atote bag and be like, oh yeah,
the Lord wants freedom for me.
But I mean that on the deepestlevel, in that he wants you to
wake up in the morning believingthe truth.
He wants you to put your feeton the floor, believing the
truth.
When those lies come in right,like you said, you want to stop
(32:46):
it as quickly as possible, allof those ways that the enemy
tries to destroy you in life.
The Lord wants you to be freeto say I'm not going to gossip,
I'm not going to choose this sin, you know, and of course, the
Christian life is easier saidthan done.
But the Lord wants you to befree from those lies.
He wants to set you free fromthose insane things that people
(33:10):
have said to you over your life.
He wants to speak truth intothose and it only comes through
going back to him again andagain and again and again.
We think of all the people whowent out to meet Jesus.
I love the hemorrhaging woman,right, she could have been
hopeless.
She could have stayed at homeand been like I have spent all
I've had.
It's not worth it.
But she goes to find the Lord,she goes to seek him, she
(33:31):
reaches out to him.
Then he sets her free from thisailment.
The Lord wants us to continueto seek him and continue to live
in that freedom, because itchanges everything.
Ellen Krause (33:42):
Absolutely Wow.
What a great way to leave aword of encouragement for our
listeners out there that onceyou are aware of what so many of
these things are, it gives youthe opportunity to be free of
that and take action like we'vetalked about Emily.
Where can listeners connectwith you and get your book?
(34:05):
Sincerely Stoneheart.
Emily Wilson Hussem (34:07):
Yeah, absolutely so.
My book Sincerely Stoneheart isavailable wherever books are
sold.
It's available on Amazon.
I have a group discussion guidethat's totally free.
That's available on my website,emilywilsonministriescom, under
my books.
You can find that there.
Women have been walking throughthis all over the world and it's
so beautiful because it startedso many real conversations that
(34:29):
really you know so often wewould never talk about most of
these things with other people,but the group discussion guide,
I hope can, you know, provide aspringboard for you to have
conversations with the women inyour life, whether that's your
mom, whether that's your Biblestudy and whether that's your
small group at your church, toreally share in your hearts
together.
(34:49):
So again, that's available atemilywilsonministriescom under
my books and, since you haven'tshown her, amazon, barnes Noble,
wherever you get a book.
Lots of Christian gift shopshave it and I would love for you
to pick up a copy and you canconnect with me online.
I'm over on Instagram trying toedify the world rather than
distract.
Give you know wonderfulencouragement for the journey.
(35:10):
So I'm just grateful for whatyou do in this world Coffee and
Bible Time.
What an edifying ministry forso many women around the world.
Ellen Krause (35:19):
Thank you, Emily.
I appreciate that so much.
Before I let you go, though, Ihave to ask you a couple of our
favorite questions for ourguests.
What is your go-to Bible andwhat translation is it?
Emily Wilson Hussem (35:30):
Yes, I have a big old Bible with a hard
blue cover.
I should have brought it toshow you.
The translation is RSV, revisedStandard Version, and it's got
big old journaling.
It's a journaling Bible and Iknow you guys are into that.
It's you know.
It's one of those ones whereyou had to find the right pens
in order for it to not leakthrough.
But I just love highlightingand writing and writing on the
(35:53):
sides and writing whateverprayers are on my heart to the
Lord, so I love that it has that, you know, area on the sides
for me to be able to do that.
Ellen Krause (36:01):
So do tell then your favorite journaling pens
are.
Emily Wilson Hussem (36:04):
Oh gosh, I don't know the brand.
I know this, but this is notsomething I know.
I bought them a while back whenI got the Bible, and I've just
been using them ever since, soI'm sorry that I'm not a good
resource on that.
Ellen Krause (36:16):
No worries.
Well, I just thank you so much,emily, for being here, for
sharing your heart, for saying,bringing to life things that so
many of us have thought of, butgiving us an opportunity to see
them for what they are and toprevent them from distracting us
(36:36):
from the truth of God's lovefor us.
So, thank you so much.
Emily Wilson Hussem (36:39):
Oh, it's been such a gift.
I am, you know, just along withyou on the journey.
You and I are in this together,along with all the listeners,
so thank you to all of you forjust sharing in this
conversation today.
Ellen Krause (36:50):
Well, if today's conversation stirred something
in you, please share it with afriend, and don't forget to
check out our community andresources at
coffeeandbibletimecom.
Until next time, keepdelighting in God's word.
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