April 10, 2023 • 30 mins
Have you lost sight of your dreams because of chronic pain, illness, injury, physical handicap, or mental illness? Are you struggling with the idea that God has forgotten about you? Then this episode of Coffee Chat with Amber & Lisa is for you! Tune in to the third episode of The Stuck Series. This episode contains some compelling revelations as the hosts recount their journey of walking through personal challenges as well as the story of one of the Leading Ladies, Lisa McIntire, who as the head of a non-profit journeyed through breast cancer. They found their reliance on God and calling was much greater than they had ever imagined.
Thank you for taking the time to like, subscribe, share, and comment. Visit leadingladies.life to find out more. Also, follow @leadingladieslife on social. Amber & Lisa are authors of the multi-award-winning book, Leading Ladies: Discover Your God-Grown Strategy for Success, which dives into the power of community and empowering women of faith to rise up and make a difference, using our gifts and faith to shine brightly in the world. Watch the Facebook Live edition on our YouTube Channel @coffeechatladies .
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Episode Transcript
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Unknown (00:10):
Would you be surprised to know that some of the most
successful women of our timeface challenges just like you
and I do. Hi, I'm Amber. And I'mLisa. We're authors of the book
leading ladies, discover yourgod brown strategy for success.
We invite you to join us in anhonest, messy bun conversation
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about the things we'd ratherkeep hidden in our lives. Some
of those things can keep us frommoving forward in purpose. So
grab a cup of somethingdelicious, kick off your shoes
and hang out with us for thenext 30 minutes.
Hello, everyone. Good morning.
We are live here on Facebook.
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Thank you guys for joining us.
It's been a hectic week. I knowfor me, I've been working on two
magazinesfor leading hearts. And Lisa has
been catching up on all of theedits for the book. Yes, it's
lots of fun little edits, wewere very encouraged that we got
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our edit back early. That meanswe didn't make too many horrible
mistakes. But there were lots ofcommas that we didn't put in
spaces we shouldn't have put in.
And all of that has to be fixed.
Yeah, it's amazing. You thinkyou've done writing all your
life. And even if you've doneblogs, or anything like that
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magazine articles, I've been inpublishing for over 26 years,
and you never stop learning.
Writing this book has been awhole new learning curve. I know
for me in writing, I am so gladto have had Lisa in this, how
many of you have a bestgirlfriend, you're like, Oh, my
goodness, I am so thankful thatyou were beside me in this. And
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we have learned by a baptism offire, which is my favorite way
to learn. I can't say it's myfavorite way to learn. Either
way, I dive in most of the time.
If our week is busy, I'm sureyour host has been to and the
fact that you stopped by thismorning just to check in and
hear what we have to say. That'sreally great. We're happy to
have you here. You know, asalways, we always invite you
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guys to the conversation. We'vebeen talking for this past month
about deafness and being stuckin certain situations. And I
know that this one isparticularly close to my heart
because it's like when your bodyjust doesn't keep up with your
calling. And I can say that as Ilook into the half century mark,
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and everyone's like, Oh, you'rea young thing. I tell you what
my bones don't work as same asthey did that I went bowling
last night was to lace up myhands. I have a serious hand
injury. I should not have that.
Okay, I have to have my hand todo my work. And now my bowling
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injuries from holding a ball. Ifeel like I'm flying right now
this morning. So it's kind ofinteresting, all those aches and
pains and you're like, Oh no, Ican't do exactly what I used to
do. I don't like to be on rollerskates anymore. I will never
take up a ministry of RollerSkating. I did roller skate. I
loved roller skating. I wasnever a roller skate backwards
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person. But you know, I don'tknow that my legs would work
like that anymore. I think Icould move forward. I just don't
know how graceful I would be.
You know, I went to Banjul Ofcourse, we weren't first to get
a dances. So going into Capecorral. That was the only way we
could use this thing to a danceyou could get to right? Yeah, it
was like, Okay, going throughthe Imperial Tetra I white
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heart. My favorite was the sweetcomfort band and Milan ever.
Yeah. Oh my goodness. Sobasically, today's conversation
we're in just right now. But ittruly is an issue. We do get
older, we start to not tofunction quite like we used to.
We don't keep up quite like weused to. But then there is a
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deeper side to this conversationas well. What do you do when
your body just doesn't playright with your calling or your
purpose? Are those things youknow you need to be about doing?
And how do you handle thosemoments? You know, we think
about people who go throughthings like terminal illness
where God has given them adiagnosis that says you have
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these days left and they are putinto a position to where they
must choose how they fulfillthose days to the best of their
ability. We're not making lightof anything like that. We
recognize that that's a totallydifferent type of walking
through life where your bodyjust the skin you live in just
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simply does not play niceWith your purpose, or with what
your passion and desire is forthose days, but there are also
scenarios that many of us walkin, we say, we can't do XYZ for
God, or we can't be involved inthese things. Because my health
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isn't predictable. Physical bodyisn't predictable. My mental
health isn't predictable. And itdoes keep us sometimes from
doing what God has called us todo, it can certainly be a
distraction, and something thatgets in the way. I think that
sometimes we have a differentidea about what purpose looks
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like who God causes in influenceand leadership. I mean, we feel
like at the end of the day, thatwe should have something, it's
almost like building a building,we should have this part of the
building done, I believe thatthe heavenly equation of purpose
doesn't quite add up to ourhuman equation of getting things
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done and built. And it's hard tokind of come into agreement and
alignment with that, as humanbeings because we naturally
desire to work, we naturallydesire to feel like we have
something to show for our effortat the end of the day, and
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sometimes we can't see it, andwe'll never see it in this
lifetime. And we talked a lotabout Lisa's autoimmune issue
might and mental health issues.
Quite a few ladies in the book,talk about their situations in
leadership that took a turn, andthey found herself reevaluating
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everything that God had calledthem to even their purpose in
that time. So I think be achallenge. Lisa, I know we
touched on your autoimmuneissue, one of the main labels of
that being rheumatoid arthritis,but there is a lot of stuff
packed down into Yeah, I thinksometimes. And it's something
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that I think more and more,we're learning more about
autoimmune disorders, and whatthey can do to us. Basically,
it's where our body turnsinward. And rather than fighting
off the bad things, thebacterias and the things that
those free radicals that get inus from stress and toxins,
instead of fighting thosethings, it turns inward and
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bites us in particular areas.
And for me, I do have severalautoimmune disorders. And for
most people who have autoimmunedisease, it's not always easy
for doctors to find out exactlywhat it is dippin them with, it
usually starts with a lot ofsymptoms that are across the
board similar having to do withjust muscle fatigue, and joints
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that don't work and pain andthings like that. Those things
can kind of keep you wanting tocurl up into a fetal position
most of the time and notfunctioning. And while I smile,
as I say that there are daysthat are very debilitating, you
can look at a person and noteven know that they go through
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that on the daily. And so a lotof times we expect things from
people that they're not capableof always giving us consistently
because of these conditions. Asa person who walks with these
types of symptoms, I have tofigure out what do I need to do
to still be able to function aseasily as possible through life,
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I have to think about things awhole lot more than I used to, I
have to plan for things a wholelot more than I used to, I have
to be wise about what I do andwhat I don't do. This is not the
same. Of course, as someone whopossibly has a disability, maybe
a physical disability, maybethere's been an accident and you
lost a limb or what about peoplewho go through lives not being
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able to hear or not being ableto see we know people every day
who have found ways to overcomeand push through. It doesn't
change the fact that they don'thave a leg or they don't have
their sight. What has somehowhappened is they're able to push
through those situations andstill function in a daily way.
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We met wonderful women as weinterviewed for this book, and
we went through this process oneof our leading ladies Lisa
McIntyre. Her chapter is such amagnificent chapter when meeting
Lisa, what was so remarkable tome about her story was just the
simple fact that she has livedfor many, many years of her life
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with an autoimmune disease. Thisautoimmune disease is a special
one to where she was told shewould probably never see her
50th year she wouldn't make itto a 50th birthday. And lo and
behold 49th birthday, she goes,Okay, I'm not supposed to live
to 50 What am I going to do withthis next year? This is all I've
got. What am I doing?
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How am I going to shoot my shotin this situation? And God
basically started to work withher on putting together a blog,
which is one of the mostbeautiful blogs I've ever seen.
Lisa is an amazing writer andcommunicator. But also on top of
that diagnosis, she received abreast cancer diagnosis and went
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through months of treatment,mastectomy, and had to gain her
health back, all while being incharge of a nonprofit, a very
good sized nonprofit. Where doyou find what it takes to crawl
through those kinds ofsituations. And I found that it
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was incredibly profound thatLisa, she has always been a top
notch businesswoman. She hasalways done excellent, she came
out of the accounting worldworking with the medical
community, and she has alwaysbeen dedicated to excellence.
But here as the executivedirector for a big nonprofit,
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and having visibility in thecommunity having to liaison and
here you are, well, natural, Ithink COVID kind of close things
down for the season of when shewas in chemo. Of course, she had
to be very careful in thatseason. But she had people in
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place that helped the process,and she had to be incredibly
reliant on the people. Now herboard of directors knew that God
had put her in that place. Andwe're confident of her giftings
right, no matter what capacityexactly, I remember her telling
me, she said, there were times Ifelt like I didn't even deserve
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a paycheck. Because I was insuch a state, I was questioning
my worth questioning here, myhair was falling out here. I
couldn't attend some meetings,we had regular zoom meetings.
But I think the dedication, Lisahad to establishing a good team.
And those people being in placemade all of this sickness
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walking through this and havingto be absent possible. So in
that Lisa had to be open to Ican't do this in my own
strength. And I think we allneed to get to the place where
we know that God, I can't dothis in my own strength. And I
need to see if there are peoplealongside me who can help me.
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And it's that whole concept thatwe keep hitting on the past
couple of weeks, who do you havearound you? What kind of people
are in your inner circle. Andfor those of us that are even in
business in the working world,what people do we have around us
as our support team. And whenthings like this happen, having
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that team having that circle ispretty much indispensable,
because the reality is, is weare disposable. There are other
people that can step in and dowhat we do. But recognizing the
strengths and the team aroundyou recognizing what it means to
be a true team. Without this, Ican do this better than her I
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should be in her position.
recognizing those type of peoplemaking sure that they feel they
are a part of what's happeningis key to being able to move
through moments like this. Yeah.
And I know, a lot of times wecarry so much on our shoulders,
we're very afraid more over thanto disappoint ourselves to
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disappoint others, right. Andwhen God takes away our ability
to step up as much, and ourhearts there to step up, a lot
of times support from othersaround us that means a lot and
hard when you go into situationnumber one where you feel like
if you can't operate a certainlevel of a sudden your whole
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future is up. Or there's someoneon your team that was
discouraged or didn't understandwhy you can't operate like you
used to operate because this isreally unseen. And in all
honesty, you're disappointingthem is the hardest thing to
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work through. Especially if theydon't have any personal
experience with anything likethis themselves. If they
themselves don't struggle withanything. Life is easy to move
through in that way orpotentially they don't have a
loved one someone that they'veknown who has had any type of
limitation. It's very hard forthem to really understand what
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you're walking through.
Sometimes relationships reallycan take a hard hit in those
moments, friendships and lovedones that you felt got you just
don't get to anymore. Yeah, whatdo you do with
that that's a lot ofdisappointment. You know, you're
disappointing them. And in theprocess, you can feel like even
you're disappointing God whenthe reality is is he's not
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caught off guard by yourcircumstance. I think we've kind
of discussed a little bit justsimply how God can use us. We
talked about Katie Nicole alittle bit with her anxiety. You
and I have had our issues. Butwhat is the main thing that you
feel is important to do when youare in that place of stuckness?
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Because your body is just notworking like it? Should your
chemicals aren't playing nicewith your brain? What do you do
to still have forward motion?
Well, I think there's anincredible beauty in just what
we're doing here is being honestabout the state of what you're
dealing with your humanity. Imean, munity. I mean, I think
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that it's incredible how justbeing real and not playing to
play ball when you're like, Hey,I'm just having a hard time
today. But also still pointingto the goodness of God, I just
love Dr. Michelle Bankston, shedeals with some serious terminal
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diagnosis is but at the sametime, it has not shaded her
desire to shine God into a verydark place of her cane, which
she is very transparent about. Iknow she has this little yellow
hard hat that she puts up on herprofile. And it's in those
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moments that you know that she'sin her most pain, right? So
that's how she lets people knowthis is a bad day. This is a bad
day, I need your prayers. And Ithink just letting people into
those moments of I may seempolished on the outside, but I
am in chronic pain. Exactly. Andthis day, it feels like I do not
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want to live, I think that thething that it comes down to how
are you able to move forward inthe midst of these times where
you just don't see how you'regoing to put one foot in front
of the other. I think what wehave to remember is Jesus is
willing to meet us right wherewe are, it does not matter our
circumstance, it does not matterthe details, he's not caught off
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guard by them. He knows ourcondition, He knows our
humanity, and he's ready to meetus right where we are with
whatever we need. You know,there are moments of divine
healing that I have seen Godpour out on people. I have also
seen people who have walkedthrough life without those
moments of dramatic divinehealing, and God still uses
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them. People often don't knowwhat battles we face behind
closed doors, what's reallygoing on on the inside,
especially when we continue topush through with His grace and
His strength. But he will meetus right there. Every single
time we allow Him in he willmeet us He will walk with us
through those situations, yourgiftings and your callings don't
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have to go up on a shelf becauseof your human condition. When
you are leaning on Jesus Callingupon him, asking him to come
into the place you're in. He isalways going to meet you there.
And he's always going tofellowship with you there. And
it is in that fellowship that wefind the strength, you know,
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something we've talked about thepast couple of weeks as being
willing to not just have thattunnel vision and look down but
to look up and out. How do Ipull myself out of those very
difficult days? Well, first ofall, I have to be thoughtful
about my physical condition. Ido have some things that I have
to do differently than everybodyelse. Another thing is, I can't
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stay down here. I have to lookup and out. I have to look at
what there is that can bring joyand also what can I do to bring
joy to others. And those arejust practical things. People
say Oh, well that doesn't soundlike anything major. It is major
when you are stuck in adifficult difficult place.
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Sometimes it's hard to pick youreyes up and outward and ask
Jesus to meet you in thatsituation. One of the things
that I've dealt with over theyears is chronic migraines and I
know a lot of ladies have thatissue and I can push myself so
much trying to work through amigraine and work through a
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migraine like do I operate atthe same level I I know if I'm
just pushing and pushing andpushing and pushing against pain
my body is going to be dealingwith that pain a lot longer than
I thought I would just givemyself a break exactly yourself
a break even with all thesemagazine deadlines, and
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I honestly was feeling veryfrustrated last week. I emailed
my publicSir, I said, I don't think I'm
gonna make this deadline. Right?
I said, it's just too much rightnow to meet this. And I have to
be okay with not meeting mydeadline. Exactly. And I can
beat myself up a lot for notbeing here, when I really know
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here is not where I have thecapacity to be exact. And how am
I overriding God's limitation? Imean, Paul, his grace being made
perfect in our weakness.
Sometimes our weakness is justour humaneness. And we can
operate here.
Right? And I'm telling you,that's like, no, no, no, take
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that down. Take that down. Myexpectation for you is totally
different from your expectationfor yourself. You know, we do
have biblical examples of whatit was like to walk in these
difficult moments. The apostlePaul, we don't know exactly what
his affliction was that look atall that Paul accomplished
through the power of Jesusthrough him in the whole scheme
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of Christianity, Paul was ableto do a mighty work for God step
into his giftings and hiscallings, in spite of, you know,
you think about the woman withthe issuance of blood. And while
we basically hear her story upto the point of her healing, and
then she disappears into what Ibelieve is probably into that
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whole sea of people who continueto tell people about the
goodness of Jesus. When I thinkabout that story, she lived in
isolation. She was basicallylooked upon as unclean for 12
years, she walked with thataffliction. And then in one
moment, her faith made herwhole, I'm not going to deny
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that God can't make us whole inone second, but I do know that
when he chooses not to or whenit doesn't happen for us, that
doesn't shortchanges on beingable to walk in God's goodness
and being able to serve othersand to do His kingdom work. It
doesn't stop any of that. Itdoesn't stop it. There are many
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people, we've got a few commentsShinohara Hi, it's so good to
see you here. Jinora is one ofmy Ruby ribbon friends. I've
only met her online, but I'vewatched her walk from a distance
as a Christian businesswoman.
And she's blessed me that shesays that sometimes our weakness
is our pride. You are so right.
Oh my goodness, handy that canbe. And then Miss Martinez,
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someone who I look up to somuch. Martina says, Yes, give
yourself a break. I've learnedthat the pain can be too much at
the moment God reminded me ofthis yesterday. Thank you for
the confirmation, ladies. Youknow, sometimes it's just really
tough. I look at those moments,I had surgery, the end of
September, I had to have acomplete hysterectomy and some
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other things had to had to befixed. And I remember why I was
trying so hard just to workthrough those first few weeks.
But I can honestly say thatduring those eight weeks of
being in a bed, God still usedme working on this book, and
interacting in a way to help usreally understand the women that
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we were putting within the pagesof like really wrapping my brain
around their stories, and Godwas able to meet with me, and
encourage me through thosemoments and still use me. And
you know what, God sometimesneed you on your back.
It says so true. Sometimes he'slike, no, no, no, girl, you need
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to stop working by hook or bycrook. I know this from personal
experience. And Lisa going amillion different places. She's
an incredible caregiver toothers, that God had to take her
to her back so that other peoplewould realize that she needed
the care then and then so atthat time, she also had the
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space to complete what God hadfor us to complete. Exactly. And
it was so surprising because Iwas like, how's this gonna get
done? And it was by the grace,an intervention of God because
he knew that he had to get usboth to our backs to make it
happen. Yeah, how many timeswhere do we feel that we have to
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be up on our game? And when Godsays no, I need to take the legs
out from under you. So yourealize that you need me
sometimes even our weakness, ourphysical limitations, the
lessons not just for us.
Sometimes there are lessons forthose around us. God will use
every single scrap every minutepiece of our experience you
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not just for us, but for thosearound us as well. Sometimes the
lessons not just for us, Amber,sometimes it's for other people
too. I am so very grateful thatwe talked about this topic, so
many people are listening andpaying attention. And I feel
like this is one that maybe I'llbe honest, I hesitated on
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wanting to pull this one outthere just because I think it
does come down to pride, likeShannara said, sometimes we
don't want to appear weak. Butin our weakness, we say it all
the time at scripture,especially for those people,
those of you that are of faith,we say all the time, in our
weakness, he has made strong,but honestly, why do we let our
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pride get in the way and itdoesn't witness to others, just
how good our God is just howmuch he sees us through every
moment. We just want to bringthis back full circle for a
second, and that is that webelieve God has gifted each and
every single one of you withdivine specially formed purpose.
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There's a reason you're here.
There's a reason why you get upevery day. No, maybe you're not
the President of the UnitedStates. No, maybe you aren't a
CEO of a huge company. Or maybeyou are, God still has divinely
purposed you he has a reason foryour being president. And it
doesn't just encompass big boldprojects, all those those are
wonderful. And I love to watchhim shake those trees. But it's
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also for the little things, thepeople you bump up against in
your daily life, your familymembers, your co workers, your
friends, he's given you a voiceand he's given you a purpose. We
want to encourage you onceagain, to step out into your
purpose, step out into yourgiftings you say well, I don't
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know what that is, I don't haveanything to offer. I'm just this
I'm just that you know what,just let him help you dream a
little bit. Just let him helpyou stir up those dreams and
visions and passions. He's putthem in you. He's put them in
you for a purpose. Don't knowwhat the purpose is. But I
believe he will give you insightand awareness as to what to do
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with yourself. I'm so gratefulfor our time together, we would
be remiss not to mention that weare here with purpose as well,
Amber and I have a bookreleasing in May. It is called
leading ladies exploring yourGod given just over your gods
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for success, your God. I'msitting here talking about
purpose. I'm like, Whoa, whatdid I just do with the title of
our book? In this book, weinterview and speak to over 30
plus women, these women comefrom all backgrounds, they are
all hues. They come from alldifferent jobs. They live in all
different places. The one thingthey have in common is they know
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Jesus. Yes. And we look at someof those women and we see people
who are just smoldering withsuccess. And then some of those
women we've never met before andyet their lives are just as
successful when you hear theirstories and you take from them
the information they have toshare about how God put them on
the path that they're on. Weknow your lives are going to be
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changed. I think the biggestmessage is never negate the
power the testimony that God hasgiven you to work through your
weakness, shine His glory that'sright after underestimate that
testimony. Because that, myfriends is purpose. Amen. This
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is more than just a book comingout. This is the power of God to
work in some of our most strangesituations to accomplish great.
We're flat on our backs girlswho stepped in saying it's a
step of faith. Sometimes there'spurpose buried deep and he says
just believe and by thetestimony that you will receive
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to shine my glory that ispurpose. That is the greatest
thing you can yes thank youJesus. I am so happy that you
joined us today. If you have notgone to our website leading
ladies dot live we want you togo there leading ladies dot life
there is a little online formyou can fill out to become a
(29:25):
VIP. That just gives us youremail address so that we can
give you updates about this bookand about any events we may have
happening. When you subscribe asa VIP, we are going to send you
an email with a link to our songthat was written by Mikayla
Weaver it is an amazinglyanointed song. It will bless you
(29:46):
to your core, utilize it in yourprayer time it is a prayer
utilize it just as a time ofencouragement should you need
it. It is on replay all the timehere for me, but we want to give
you that free downloadso that you can be blessed as
well. We'll give you all thedetails about the book with that
mailing list as well. Thank youguys for joining us this week.
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We're going to stay in our stuckto move forward next week.
That's right. We're gonna stayin our stuck to move forward.
So I hope you guys join us nextweek for another conversation of
moving forward in stucknessmoving forward in our perceived
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stucknessand thank you so much for
joining us and you guys. Have agreat rest of the weekend. Bye
Would you be surprised to know that some of the most
successful women of our timeface challenges just like you
and I do. Hi, I'm Amber. And I'mLisa. We're authors of the book
leading ladies, discover yourgod brown strategy for success.
We invite you to join us in anhonest, messy bun conversation
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about the things we'd ratherkeep hidden in our lives. Some
of those things can keep us frommoving forward in purpose. So
grab a cup of somethingdelicious, kick off your shoes
and hang out with us for thenext 30 minutes.
Hello, everyone. Good morning.
We are live here on Facebook.
(00:55):
Thank you guys for joining us.
It's been a hectic week. I knowfor me, I've been working on two
magazinesfor leading hearts. And Lisa has
been catching up on all of theedits for the book. Yes, it's
lots of fun little edits, wewere very encouraged that we got
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our edit back early. That meanswe didn't make too many horrible
mistakes. But there were lots ofcommas that we didn't put in
spaces we shouldn't have put in.
And all of that has to be fixed.
Yeah, it's amazing. You thinkyou've done writing all your
life. And even if you've doneblogs, or anything like that
(01:36):
magazine articles, I've been inpublishing for over 26 years,
and you never stop learning.
Writing this book has been awhole new learning curve. I know
for me in writing, I am so gladto have had Lisa in this, how
many of you have a bestgirlfriend, you're like, Oh, my
goodness, I am so thankful thatyou were beside me in this. And
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we have learned by a baptism offire, which is my favorite way
to learn. I can't say it's myfavorite way to learn. Either
way, I dive in most of the time.
If our week is busy, I'm sureyour host has been to and the
fact that you stopped by thismorning just to check in and
hear what we have to say. That'sreally great. We're happy to
have you here. You know, asalways, we always invite you
(02:22):
guys to the conversation. We'vebeen talking for this past month
about deafness and being stuckin certain situations. And I
know that this one isparticularly close to my heart
because it's like when your bodyjust doesn't keep up with your
calling. And I can say that as Ilook into the half century mark,
(02:44):
and everyone's like, Oh, you'rea young thing. I tell you what
my bones don't work as same asthey did that I went bowling
last night was to lace up myhands. I have a serious hand
injury. I should not have that.
Okay, I have to have my hand todo my work. And now my bowling
(03:05):
injuries from holding a ball. Ifeel like I'm flying right now
this morning. So it's kind ofinteresting, all those aches and
pains and you're like, Oh no, Ican't do exactly what I used to
do. I don't like to be on rollerskates anymore. I will never
take up a ministry of RollerSkating. I did roller skate. I
loved roller skating. I wasnever a roller skate backwards
(03:27):
person. But you know, I don'tknow that my legs would work
like that anymore. I think Icould move forward. I just don't
know how graceful I would be.
You know, I went to Banjul Ofcourse, we weren't first to get
a dances. So going into Capecorral. That was the only way we
could use this thing to a danceyou could get to right? Yeah, it
was like, Okay, going throughthe Imperial Tetra I white
(03:48):
heart. My favorite was the sweetcomfort band and Milan ever.
Yeah. Oh my goodness. Sobasically, today's conversation
we're in just right now. But ittruly is an issue. We do get
older, we start to not tofunction quite like we used to.
We don't keep up quite like weused to. But then there is a
(04:11):
deeper side to this conversationas well. What do you do when
your body just doesn't playright with your calling or your
purpose? Are those things youknow you need to be about doing?
And how do you handle thosemoments? You know, we think
about people who go throughthings like terminal illness
where God has given them adiagnosis that says you have
(04:34):
these days left and they are putinto a position to where they
must choose how they fulfillthose days to the best of their
ability. We're not making lightof anything like that. We
recognize that that's a totallydifferent type of walking
through life where your bodyjust the skin you live in just
(04:55):
simply does not play niceWith your purpose, or with what
your passion and desire is forthose days, but there are also
scenarios that many of us walkin, we say, we can't do XYZ for
God, or we can't be involved inthese things. Because my health
(05:17):
isn't predictable. Physical bodyisn't predictable. My mental
health isn't predictable. And itdoes keep us sometimes from
doing what God has called us todo, it can certainly be a
distraction, and something thatgets in the way. I think that
sometimes we have a differentidea about what purpose looks
(05:37):
like who God causes in influenceand leadership. I mean, we feel
like at the end of the day, thatwe should have something, it's
almost like building a building,we should have this part of the
building done, I believe thatthe heavenly equation of purpose
doesn't quite add up to ourhuman equation of getting things
(05:58):
done and built. And it's hard tokind of come into agreement and
alignment with that, as humanbeings because we naturally
desire to work, we naturallydesire to feel like we have
something to show for our effortat the end of the day, and
(06:18):
sometimes we can't see it, andwe'll never see it in this
lifetime. And we talked a lotabout Lisa's autoimmune issue
might and mental health issues.
Quite a few ladies in the book,talk about their situations in
leadership that took a turn, andthey found herself reevaluating
(06:39):
everything that God had calledthem to even their purpose in
that time. So I think be achallenge. Lisa, I know we
touched on your autoimmuneissue, one of the main labels of
that being rheumatoid arthritis,but there is a lot of stuff
packed down into Yeah, I thinksometimes. And it's something
(07:00):
that I think more and more,we're learning more about
autoimmune disorders, and whatthey can do to us. Basically,
it's where our body turnsinward. And rather than fighting
off the bad things, thebacterias and the things that
those free radicals that get inus from stress and toxins,
instead of fighting thosethings, it turns inward and
(07:21):
bites us in particular areas.
And for me, I do have severalautoimmune disorders. And for
most people who have autoimmunedisease, it's not always easy
for doctors to find out exactlywhat it is dippin them with, it
usually starts with a lot ofsymptoms that are across the
board similar having to do withjust muscle fatigue, and joints
(07:42):
that don't work and pain andthings like that. Those things
can kind of keep you wanting tocurl up into a fetal position
most of the time and notfunctioning. And while I smile,
as I say that there are daysthat are very debilitating, you
can look at a person and noteven know that they go through
(08:03):
that on the daily. And so a lotof times we expect things from
people that they're not capableof always giving us consistently
because of these conditions. Asa person who walks with these
types of symptoms, I have tofigure out what do I need to do
to still be able to function aseasily as possible through life,
(08:27):
I have to think about things awhole lot more than I used to, I
have to plan for things a wholelot more than I used to, I have
to be wise about what I do andwhat I don't do. This is not the
same. Of course, as someone whopossibly has a disability, maybe
a physical disability, maybethere's been an accident and you
lost a limb or what about peoplewho go through lives not being
(08:50):
able to hear or not being ableto see we know people every day
who have found ways to overcomeand push through. It doesn't
change the fact that they don'thave a leg or they don't have
their sight. What has somehowhappened is they're able to push
through those situations andstill function in a daily way.
(09:12):
We met wonderful women as weinterviewed for this book, and
we went through this process oneof our leading ladies Lisa
McIntyre. Her chapter is such amagnificent chapter when meeting
Lisa, what was so remarkable tome about her story was just the
simple fact that she has livedfor many, many years of her life
(09:37):
with an autoimmune disease. Thisautoimmune disease is a special
one to where she was told shewould probably never see her
50th year she wouldn't make itto a 50th birthday. And lo and
behold 49th birthday, she goes,Okay, I'm not supposed to live
to 50 What am I going to do withthis next year? This is all I've
got. What am I doing?
(10:00):
How am I going to shoot my shotin this situation? And God
basically started to work withher on putting together a blog,
which is one of the mostbeautiful blogs I've ever seen.
Lisa is an amazing writer andcommunicator. But also on top of
that diagnosis, she received abreast cancer diagnosis and went
(10:22):
through months of treatment,mastectomy, and had to gain her
health back, all while being incharge of a nonprofit, a very
good sized nonprofit. Where doyou find what it takes to crawl
through those kinds ofsituations. And I found that it
(10:43):
was incredibly profound thatLisa, she has always been a top
notch businesswoman. She hasalways done excellent, she came
out of the accounting worldworking with the medical
community, and she has alwaysbeen dedicated to excellence.
But here as the executivedirector for a big nonprofit,
(11:08):
and having visibility in thecommunity having to liaison and
here you are, well, natural, Ithink COVID kind of close things
down for the season of when shewas in chemo. Of course, she had
to be very careful in thatseason. But she had people in
(11:28):
place that helped the process,and she had to be incredibly
reliant on the people. Now herboard of directors knew that God
had put her in that place. Andwe're confident of her giftings
right, no matter what capacityexactly, I remember her telling
me, she said, there were times Ifelt like I didn't even deserve
(11:50):
a paycheck. Because I was insuch a state, I was questioning
my worth questioning here, myhair was falling out here. I
couldn't attend some meetings,we had regular zoom meetings.
But I think the dedication, Lisahad to establishing a good team.
And those people being in placemade all of this sickness
(12:13):
walking through this and havingto be absent possible. So in
that Lisa had to be open to Ican't do this in my own
strength. And I think we allneed to get to the place where
we know that God, I can't dothis in my own strength. And I
need to see if there are peoplealongside me who can help me.
(12:35):
And it's that whole concept thatwe keep hitting on the past
couple of weeks, who do you havearound you? What kind of people
are in your inner circle. Andfor those of us that are even in
business in the working world,what people do we have around us
as our support team. And whenthings like this happen, having
(12:56):
that team having that circle ispretty much indispensable,
because the reality is, is weare disposable. There are other
people that can step in and dowhat we do. But recognizing the
strengths and the team aroundyou recognizing what it means to
be a true team. Without this, Ican do this better than her I
(13:18):
should be in her position.
recognizing those type of peoplemaking sure that they feel they
are a part of what's happeningis key to being able to move
through moments like this. Yeah.
And I know, a lot of times wecarry so much on our shoulders,
we're very afraid more over thanto disappoint ourselves to
(13:41):
disappoint others, right. Andwhen God takes away our ability
to step up as much, and ourhearts there to step up, a lot
of times support from othersaround us that means a lot and
hard when you go into situationnumber one where you feel like
if you can't operate a certainlevel of a sudden your whole
(14:03):
future is up. Or there's someoneon your team that was
discouraged or didn't understandwhy you can't operate like you
used to operate because this isreally unseen. And in all
honesty, you're disappointingthem is the hardest thing to
(14:23):
work through. Especially if theydon't have any personal
experience with anything likethis themselves. If they
themselves don't struggle withanything. Life is easy to move
through in that way orpotentially they don't have a
loved one someone that they'veknown who has had any type of
limitation. It's very hard forthem to really understand what
(14:45):
you're walking through.
Sometimes relationships reallycan take a hard hit in those
moments, friendships and lovedones that you felt got you just
don't get to anymore. Yeah, whatdo you do with
that that's a lot ofdisappointment. You know, you're
disappointing them. And in theprocess, you can feel like even
you're disappointing God whenthe reality is is he's not
(15:08):
caught off guard by yourcircumstance. I think we've kind
of discussed a little bit justsimply how God can use us. We
talked about Katie Nicole alittle bit with her anxiety. You
and I have had our issues. Butwhat is the main thing that you
feel is important to do when youare in that place of stuckness?
(15:29):
Because your body is just notworking like it? Should your
chemicals aren't playing nicewith your brain? What do you do
to still have forward motion?
Well, I think there's anincredible beauty in just what
we're doing here is being honestabout the state of what you're
dealing with your humanity. Imean, munity. I mean, I think
(15:51):
that it's incredible how justbeing real and not playing to
play ball when you're like, Hey,I'm just having a hard time
today. But also still pointingto the goodness of God, I just
love Dr. Michelle Bankston, shedeals with some serious terminal
(16:11):
diagnosis is but at the sametime, it has not shaded her
desire to shine God into a verydark place of her cane, which
she is very transparent about. Iknow she has this little yellow
hard hat that she puts up on herprofile. And it's in those
(16:34):
moments that you know that she'sin her most pain, right? So
that's how she lets people knowthis is a bad day. This is a bad
day, I need your prayers. And Ithink just letting people into
those moments of I may seempolished on the outside, but I
am in chronic pain. Exactly. Andthis day, it feels like I do not
(16:57):
want to live, I think that thething that it comes down to how
are you able to move forward inthe midst of these times where
you just don't see how you'regoing to put one foot in front
of the other. I think what wehave to remember is Jesus is
willing to meet us right wherewe are, it does not matter our
circumstance, it does not matterthe details, he's not caught off
(17:20):
guard by them. He knows ourcondition, He knows our
humanity, and he's ready to meetus right where we are with
whatever we need. You know,there are moments of divine
healing that I have seen Godpour out on people. I have also
seen people who have walkedthrough life without those
moments of dramatic divinehealing, and God still uses
(17:41):
them. People often don't knowwhat battles we face behind
closed doors, what's reallygoing on on the inside,
especially when we continue topush through with His grace and
His strength. But he will meetus right there. Every single
time we allow Him in he willmeet us He will walk with us
through those situations, yourgiftings and your callings don't
(18:04):
have to go up on a shelf becauseof your human condition. When
you are leaning on Jesus Callingupon him, asking him to come
into the place you're in. He isalways going to meet you there.
And he's always going tofellowship with you there. And
it is in that fellowship that wefind the strength, you know,
(18:26):
something we've talked about thepast couple of weeks as being
willing to not just have thattunnel vision and look down but
to look up and out. How do Ipull myself out of those very
difficult days? Well, first ofall, I have to be thoughtful
about my physical condition. Ido have some things that I have
to do differently than everybodyelse. Another thing is, I can't
(18:46):
stay down here. I have to lookup and out. I have to look at
what there is that can bring joyand also what can I do to bring
joy to others. And those arejust practical things. People
say Oh, well that doesn't soundlike anything major. It is major
when you are stuck in adifficult difficult place.
(19:07):
Sometimes it's hard to pick youreyes up and outward and ask
Jesus to meet you in thatsituation. One of the things
that I've dealt with over theyears is chronic migraines and I
know a lot of ladies have thatissue and I can push myself so
much trying to work through amigraine and work through a
(19:27):
migraine like do I operate atthe same level I I know if I'm
just pushing and pushing andpushing and pushing against pain
my body is going to be dealingwith that pain a lot longer than
I thought I would just givemyself a break exactly yourself
a break even with all thesemagazine deadlines, and
(19:54):
I honestly was feeling veryfrustrated last week. I emailed
my publicSir, I said, I don't think I'm
gonna make this deadline. Right?
I said, it's just too much rightnow to meet this. And I have to
be okay with not meeting mydeadline. Exactly. And I can
beat myself up a lot for notbeing here, when I really know
(20:17):
here is not where I have thecapacity to be exact. And how am
I overriding God's limitation? Imean, Paul, his grace being made
perfect in our weakness.
Sometimes our weakness is justour humaneness. And we can
operate here.
Right? And I'm telling you,that's like, no, no, no, take
(20:40):
that down. Take that down. Myexpectation for you is totally
different from your expectationfor yourself. You know, we do
have biblical examples of whatit was like to walk in these
difficult moments. The apostlePaul, we don't know exactly what
his affliction was that look atall that Paul accomplished
through the power of Jesusthrough him in the whole scheme
(21:02):
of Christianity, Paul was ableto do a mighty work for God step
into his giftings and hiscallings, in spite of, you know,
you think about the woman withthe issuance of blood. And while
we basically hear her story upto the point of her healing, and
then she disappears into what Ibelieve is probably into that
(21:23):
whole sea of people who continueto tell people about the
goodness of Jesus. When I thinkabout that story, she lived in
isolation. She was basicallylooked upon as unclean for 12
years, she walked with thataffliction. And then in one
moment, her faith made herwhole, I'm not going to deny
(21:45):
that God can't make us whole inone second, but I do know that
when he chooses not to or whenit doesn't happen for us, that
doesn't shortchanges on beingable to walk in God's goodness
and being able to serve othersand to do His kingdom work. It
doesn't stop any of that. Itdoesn't stop it. There are many
(22:08):
people, we've got a few commentsShinohara Hi, it's so good to
see you here. Jinora is one ofmy Ruby ribbon friends. I've
only met her online, but I'vewatched her walk from a distance
as a Christian businesswoman.
And she's blessed me that shesays that sometimes our weakness
is our pride. You are so right.
Oh my goodness, handy that canbe. And then Miss Martinez,
(22:32):
someone who I look up to somuch. Martina says, Yes, give
yourself a break. I've learnedthat the pain can be too much at
the moment God reminded me ofthis yesterday. Thank you for
the confirmation, ladies. Youknow, sometimes it's just really
tough. I look at those moments,I had surgery, the end of
September, I had to have acomplete hysterectomy and some
(22:55):
other things had to had to befixed. And I remember why I was
trying so hard just to workthrough those first few weeks.
But I can honestly say thatduring those eight weeks of
being in a bed, God still usedme working on this book, and
interacting in a way to help usreally understand the women that
(23:18):
we were putting within the pagesof like really wrapping my brain
around their stories, and Godwas able to meet with me, and
encourage me through thosemoments and still use me. And
you know what, God sometimesneed you on your back.
It says so true. Sometimes he'slike, no, no, no, girl, you need
(23:43):
to stop working by hook or bycrook. I know this from personal
experience. And Lisa going amillion different places. She's
an incredible caregiver toothers, that God had to take her
to her back so that other peoplewould realize that she needed
the care then and then so atthat time, she also had the
(24:05):
space to complete what God hadfor us to complete. Exactly. And
it was so surprising because Iwas like, how's this gonna get
done? And it was by the grace,an intervention of God because
he knew that he had to get usboth to our backs to make it
happen. Yeah, how many timeswhere do we feel that we have to
(24:30):
be up on our game? And when Godsays no, I need to take the legs
out from under you. So yourealize that you need me
sometimes even our weakness, ourphysical limitations, the
lessons not just for us.
Sometimes there are lessons forthose around us. God will use
every single scrap every minutepiece of our experience you
(25:00):
not just for us, but for thosearound us as well. Sometimes the
lessons not just for us, Amber,sometimes it's for other people
too. I am so very grateful thatwe talked about this topic, so
many people are listening andpaying attention. And I feel
like this is one that maybe I'llbe honest, I hesitated on
(25:21):
wanting to pull this one outthere just because I think it
does come down to pride, likeShannara said, sometimes we
don't want to appear weak. Butin our weakness, we say it all
the time at scripture,especially for those people,
those of you that are of faith,we say all the time, in our
weakness, he has made strong,but honestly, why do we let our
(25:43):
pride get in the way and itdoesn't witness to others, just
how good our God is just howmuch he sees us through every
moment. We just want to bringthis back full circle for a
second, and that is that webelieve God has gifted each and
every single one of you withdivine specially formed purpose.
(26:07):
There's a reason you're here.
There's a reason why you get upevery day. No, maybe you're not
the President of the UnitedStates. No, maybe you aren't a
CEO of a huge company. Or maybeyou are, God still has divinely
purposed you he has a reason foryour being president. And it
doesn't just encompass big boldprojects, all those those are
wonderful. And I love to watchhim shake those trees. But it's
(26:30):
also for the little things, thepeople you bump up against in
your daily life, your familymembers, your co workers, your
friends, he's given you a voiceand he's given you a purpose. We
want to encourage you onceagain, to step out into your
purpose, step out into yourgiftings you say well, I don't
(26:50):
know what that is, I don't haveanything to offer. I'm just this
I'm just that you know what,just let him help you dream a
little bit. Just let him helpyou stir up those dreams and
visions and passions. He's putthem in you. He's put them in
you for a purpose. Don't knowwhat the purpose is. But I
believe he will give you insightand awareness as to what to do
(27:12):
with yourself. I'm so gratefulfor our time together, we would
be remiss not to mention that weare here with purpose as well,
Amber and I have a bookreleasing in May. It is called
leading ladies exploring yourGod given just over your gods
(27:33):
for success, your God. I'msitting here talking about
purpose. I'm like, Whoa, whatdid I just do with the title of
our book? In this book, weinterview and speak to over 30
plus women, these women comefrom all backgrounds, they are
all hues. They come from alldifferent jobs. They live in all
different places. The one thingthey have in common is they know
(27:55):
Jesus. Yes. And we look at someof those women and we see people
who are just smoldering withsuccess. And then some of those
women we've never met before andyet their lives are just as
successful when you hear theirstories and you take from them
the information they have toshare about how God put them on
the path that they're on. Weknow your lives are going to be
(28:16):
changed. I think the biggestmessage is never negate the
power the testimony that God hasgiven you to work through your
weakness, shine His glory that'sright after underestimate that
testimony. Because that, myfriends is purpose. Amen. This
(28:39):
is more than just a book comingout. This is the power of God to
work in some of our most strangesituations to accomplish great.
We're flat on our backs girlswho stepped in saying it's a
step of faith. Sometimes there'spurpose buried deep and he says
just believe and by thetestimony that you will receive
(29:04):
to shine my glory that ispurpose. That is the greatest
thing you can yes thank youJesus. I am so happy that you
joined us today. If you have notgone to our website leading
ladies dot live we want you togo there leading ladies dot life
there is a little online formyou can fill out to become a
(29:25):
VIP. That just gives us youremail address so that we can
give you updates about this bookand about any events we may have
happening. When you subscribe asa VIP, we are going to send you
an email with a link to our songthat was written by Mikayla
Weaver it is an amazinglyanointed song. It will bless you
(29:46):
to your core, utilize it in yourprayer time it is a prayer
utilize it just as a time ofencouragement should you need
it. It is on replay all the timehere for me, but we want to give
you that free downloadso that you can be blessed as
well. We'll give you all thedetails about the book with that
mailing list as well. Thank youguys for joining us this week.
(30:07):
We're going to stay in our stuckto move forward next week.
That's right. We're gonna stayin our stuck to move forward.
So I hope you guys join us nextweek for another conversation of
moving forward in stucknessmoving forward in our perceived
(30:29):
stucknessand thank you so much for
joining us and you guys. Have agreat rest of the weekend. Bye
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