November 18, 2023 • 28 mins
Have you ever felt stuck in a rut, yearning for a breakthrough, but the chains of insecurity have kept you bound? Brace yourself for a riveting conversation with our special guest, Tracy Hester Glass. This remarkable woman bared her soul and shared her journey of healing from the throes of a painful divorce after 24 years of marriage. Tracy's story, which inspired her book 'Get Up Girl, Let's Go Getting Unstuck and Living Free', is a testament to the resilience and the solid foundation built on Christ.
During our chat, Tracy delves into how she triumphed over her insecurities, learned to value herself as a woman, and stepped into the boldness God ordained for her. It's a tale of transformation.
In the final part of our heart-to-heart, we touch upon the importance of discerning God's will and the power of saying 'no' to things that don't align with our divine path. Tracy gives us an insight into her journey of deciphering God's message and the art of communicating it effectively. Be prepared to be inspired to let your gifts shine bright!
Thank you for taking the time to like, subscribe, share, and comment. Visit leadingladies.life to find out more. Also, follow @leadingladieslife on social. Amber & Lisa are authors of the multi-award-winning book, Leading Ladies: Discover Your God-Grown Strategy for Success, which dives into the power of community and empowering women of faith to rise up and make a difference, using our gifts and faith to shine brightly in the world. Watch the Facebook Live edition on our YouTube Channel @coffeechatladies .
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Would you be surprised to know that some of
the most successful women of ourtime face challenges just like
you and I do?
Hi, I'm Amber and I'm Lisa.
We're authors of the bookLeading Ladies Discover your
God-grown strategy for success.
We invite you to join us in anhonest, messy-bun conversation
(00:30):
about the things we'd ratherkeep hidden in our lives.
Some of those things can keepus from moving forward in
purpose.
So grab a cup of somethingdelicious, kick off your shoes
and hang out with us for thenext 30 minutes.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Good morning and welcome to another coffee chat
with Amber and Lisa, and we areso happy to have a dear friend
and amazing award-winning authoron the podcast today, tracy
Hester Glass.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
We're so excited to have you with us.
For those of you that don'tknow, Tracy is one of our
contributors in the book.
Tracy officially gave uschapter two.
She is one of the firstchapters that we edited.
Her chapter is entitled StopWaiting for Permission.
We are happy to talk about that.
She has a book titled Get UpGirl, let's Go Getting Unstucked
(01:22):
and Living Free, and the bookis under Tracy Hester.
She's also a newlywed.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Yes, yeah.
Lots of stuff going on.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
You're a busy lady.
Tell us a little bit just aboutyour inspiration for that book.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Actually, lisa, my inspiration came because I was
walking through a divorce.
After 24 years of being married, I had gotten to the point
where I was on the other side ofgetting healed and I just felt
like there are so many womenthat are walking through a
divorce and just need hope.
And so it came from thatinspiration that I was ready to
(02:03):
tell my story, and I guess thatwas my first step in leading.
Both is being comfortable withtalking about the D, which is
the divorce.
I think that if you've walkedthrough a divorce, there can be
a lot of embarrassment and shameand you don't really want to
talk about it.
You just want to sweep it inthe car and say, okay, can this
(02:23):
just go away?
So it was out of obedience.
I felt like the Lord was sayingyou need to get this out, it
needs to help people, and it washealing for myself to begin to
write about it.
I had gone through an amazinghealing journey.
Often times there are stillresidue that's left over as we
(02:44):
go through a healing journey,and there still is, because when
we have trauma in our life, itis a process that we go through.
And it was all of that combined, lisa, why I wrote the book, I
didn't think that the book wasgoing to have the impact that it
is having right now because,honestly, I'm a new writer.
(03:05):
This writing game came to melater in life.
I'm not the girl that could say, oh, I was always journaling in
my diary and always dreamingabout releasing the book.
No, that's not me.
It was a gift.
Later on that, I think, cameout of desperation that I wanted
to heal and at the time I stillam the mentoring director at my
(03:29):
church and so I was mentoringwomen.
I was asking the Lord what arethe keys, god, for women to
really be set free in life andto live the victorious and
abundant life that's promised inscripture?
And so I felt like writing thatbook was a step to help them.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
I remember when you said, actually at the beginning
of this, that you went into thiswhole process thinking I'm not
even a writer, I'm a speaker, Idon't want to write a book.
But Tracy actually was thefirst one to finish a chapter in
this book, because I was on thephone with her talking about
(04:07):
Get Up, girl, let's Go, and wewere working on that cover
project and I started talking toher about the idea of leading
without permission and so shewrote that chapter and it
released some things in me thatmade me be able to tell my story
, and I think that's one of thepowerful things of telling our
(04:29):
stories that it makes it that werelease people to tell their
stories and live in transparencyand vulnerability and get those
old things that are draggingalong like a dead horse off of
us.
Yeah, one of those things thatyou said, a lady came to, came
to you and she saw that you wereholding something back.
(04:51):
Is it because of shame orbecause you don't want to shine
too bright?
So great Paradox.
Let me pull some things apart inmy story and say, okay, I'm
going to be real, real, honest,let's be honest.
And if I was trying, if I wastransparent enough to walk
through it.
Let's be transparent enough touse that to help some people.
(05:13):
And so I was so thankfulbecause that didn't even that,
just didn't even only help thebook.
It helped me and the power oftransformation and that's the
power of vulnerability.
But, tracy, tell me, before,before you walked out, before
you walked into divorce, wereyou already in ministry?
Speaker 4 (05:36):
I was.
Yeah, we were both in ministryand I think that's what made it
more shameful that they shouldknow better.
We should be able to figurethis out and yeah, and so I felt
, when it happened, that I wasnow disqualified D divorce,
disqualified from serving in anyway, and so I took a step back
(06:00):
and at the time it wasn'tnegative.
I took a step back to heal,because we can only lead out of
our own deliverance and our ownhealing in life.
I can't mentor anybody if I'mbroken.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
What did you in that process of healing?
I know a lot of people turn toa lot of different things.
Some people return to counsel.
What steps did you take to heal?
What did God lead you to towatch your heart come back to a
healthy space?
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Lisa, honestly, I didn't know the steps initially,
so I did what was comfortableand I was hiding, I was faking
it.
You know how you'd have thisdeep gut pain that's going on.
You still need to show up, needto show up for work, need to
show up for my kids, need toshow up right, because only the
(06:50):
strong survive.
And so I was showing up like Ishow up, smile on the face, pain
, the pain I've never, uh, dealtwith before emotionally like
this.
And so one day, my daughter,who had come home that year from
college.
I came downstairs and she hadleft me a note on an napkin and
(07:11):
it said mom, I need you tosurvive.
And I realized at that pointthat I'm not doing a good job of
faking it, I'm not doing thisright.
And so it was at that pointthat I reached out to someone
and I began counseling and Ispent two years in with a
wonderful woman who is Iconsider her my spiritual mentor
(07:34):
, and she really transformed,helped me see how God sees me,
even though I'm walking throughthis divorce.
And how do I come out this aspure goal, how do I still give
God glory in the face of chaos?
And, wow, that was such avaluable time, and so I know
that was orchestrated by theLord for me to go through that
(07:56):
process so that I could write achapter in the 80s, right a book
and do the ministry that I did.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
Wow, have you written this chapter for us, your own
book?
You have an establishedministry.
You are going places andspreading a message to help
other women go through this.
I just want to make sure thatour listeners know Tracy does
have a website, tracyhestercom,and can people contact you for
(08:27):
things through your website?
Absolutely.
I'm very excited about anotherproject that you are doing.
Every once in a while I willcatch videos on social media
that Tracy has put out.
She is doing a project with herdaughter, courtney.
It's called mommy issues.
Tell me about this project alittle bit, because I think this
(08:50):
is something many women motherdaughters, even mother sons.
It's a little different dynamic, but I'm excited about it okay,
my daughter Courtney, she'samazing, do you ever?
Speaker 4 (09:01):
because are you both mothers, right?
You both have daughters.
Okay, it's like you look atyour daughters at their age and
I said, man, I wish I was aswise as she is and her age, and
so she's just a real old soul,lots of wisdom.
But one thing about my daughterthat I admire most about her is
she's very courageous.
She's so much more courageousthan I was, she's so much more
(09:25):
bold than I was at her age, andshe won't be 30 this year and
she just received her doctorateof psychology.
And so for the last five yearsor more, because she was an
undergrad and then masters andthen her doctor program, she is
a psychologist and so years agowe had an idea to do mommy
(09:47):
issues.
And because you don't hearpeople talking about issues with
their moms you'll hear daddyissues but you don't hear about
mommy issues and I think thatthere's this underlining respect
that I'll talk about my mother.
I'm not gonna go there with mymother, not gonna.
But we had the idea.
It was on the table because,just busyness, she had a baby,
(10:10):
I'm doing certain things andthen two years ago, her and her
husband came to live with me.
They were saving money onincome family.
My son in love was just working,my daughter was in school and
then she was pregnant and at thetime she was dealing with some
joint pain and she was havingsome issues.
And so she said mom, can wecome live with you?
(10:32):
Sure, they lived with me for ayear and a half and we noticed
that we had some issues.
The whole issue of mommy issuesbecame a lie.
Before it was a cute idea, oh,we should do this, and now it
was like, ooh, this is real, wereally do have issues, right.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
We do have an issue right here in record.
Speaker 4 (10:54):
And so we decided because the original idea was to
do record it and to help people.
But now we said, okay, let's doit.
And so we sat down on aSaturday for about four hours
and we recorded in some candidconversation of unslip and
(11:15):
talked about the divorce, talkedabout stuff like mom, why
didn't you talk about it?
Why didn't you help me duringthat season?
And I had to be honest, Icouldn't.
When you're going throughsomething so traumatic, you go
into like survival mode, right,and I'm trying to survive, I'm
(11:37):
trying to help myself.
We can't minister to others.
We're drowning.
Can't save you if I'm drowning.
So those were the kinds ofconversations that we had.
And then it's not just that shehad issues with me, but the
whole point of the podcast toois for daughters and mothers to
(11:57):
understand that mommies haveissues too.
We're not super women.
We don't wear capes 24-7.
We have blood in our veins andwe're human, because at times I
think children don't see moms ashuman.
That was the inspiration in whywe recorded mommy issues.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I think sometimes our tendency is we either we're
going women, we do a couple ofdifferent things.
Either we just like to act likethings aren't happening, I'll
just deal with it.
We kind of martyr.
I'll put it on my own behindclosed doors, I don't want to
take anybody with me.
Or we take the other turn.
We start to worry abouteveryone else.
(12:41):
How can I help them?
Oh no, I'll deal with me later.
Let me put them first.
And all of that kind of tiesinto it even goes back to your
book Girl, get Up, girl and Go.
Because, in all honesty, wekeep ourselves in a space to
where we're really not steppinginto where we need to be what
God's called us to do.
(13:02):
We're so busy trying toprivately not bring anything on
anybody else or take care ofeveryone else.
We don't do business at hand.
What kind of things did youhave to do to finally start
stepping out in boldness, takingthe bull by the horns?
That's a good question.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
Lisa, I think it started with me understanding my
value as a woman.
You know, this morning I wasreading in Proverbs 31, and
verse 18 really jumped out at me, and I couldn't even finish
reading the rest of the chapter,because what it said is that
(13:43):
she sees her merchandise as good, and I didn't see my
merchandise as good, I saw it asdamaged.
In you're in a singing groupyou might sing.
In you're the background singeroh, I could be a good
background singer, but God wascalling me to lead, take a lead
(14:06):
in the band, in my circle ofinfluence.
And so it's getting to thepoint of just saying, yes, god,
I will step out, even though Ifeel insecure, intimidated and
not prepared.
Right?
So really it was overcomingsome insecurities and learning
(14:27):
the value of just saying yes toGod, right?
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I love that.
I love that she sees hermerchandise as good.
She sees it as good Because Goddoes not treat our gifts like
we're in the bargain basement ofwe.
We are equal in whatever wehave and we don't see we're
wanting to compare ourmerchandise with other people's
(14:54):
merchandise.
They're Delce and Gabana andI'm like Walmart special, blue
Light special.
That is not.
That's not who we serve, and wewant to know that all that we
have to offer is of value.
We all have something veryvaluable to offer.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
So incredible.
I'm glad they brought thatfirst to our attention today.
Speaker 4 (15:23):
And you know, what I noticed to Amber is that the
merchandise that she wasreferring to was nothing of her
outward, it was all her inward,her character, her how God
gifted her and saying I'mputting it on display Was hot,
she was bad.
If you read it, what she stuff,she did, man, she was something
(15:46):
else and I just believe thatProverbs 31 is really a model
for us.
It's not, it's nothing.
You know how you say, oh, Iwant to be a Proverbs 31 woman,
a man.
Or saying, oh, I want my wifeto be a Proverbs 31 woman.
You know what.
She's nothing to be intimidatedabout, saying, oh, no, I can't
be her.
It's just something for us togrow and see her character and
(16:08):
how blessed she was because sheknew who she was in God and she
was not holding back.
She had the ministry to me ofduplication and multiplication
times 10 of the things that werecoming out of her and I was
inspired this morning as I wasreading about her that her
merchandise was good and that iswhat we as women have to begin
(16:31):
to see as our merchandises.
I'm valuable, I bring somethingto the table, my voice needs to
be heard because God has givenme something to say.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
We have a.
We were at the NationalReligious Broadcasters
conference and one of the womenthat were signing their books
and her name escapes me, she'san ASSA.
I know she's in the AdvancedWriters and Speakers and
Associates wrote a book on theProverbs 31 woman and she did it
.
Basically, speaking from theaspect of what does it mean to
(17:03):
be a Proverbs 31 woman.
We hear this word virtuous, wethink about different emotions
and really what the Hebrew wordmeans.
In there, that word virtuousalmost seems like an
unattainable thing.
And then you read all thethings that she does and you're
going, oh, I'm not virtuous, Ican't do that.
But really what that word meansis wrong.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
And wisdom.
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
It's okay.
Some of us have had to learn tobe strong.
We've been strong at differentpoints in our life.
But that seems a little bitmore like with God's help, we
can do that.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
Absolutely.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
I want to read a little bit from your book.
I have some words that I reallyappreciate.
When we get to the close ofyour chapter, you talk about how
you have God's permission toshine bright.
You don't really need anyoneelse's permission, it's God's
permission that counts.
And you say God is compellingus to lead boldly with a fresh
(18:00):
perspective, with Jesusperspective.
His goal is to fulfill the willof his father.
So let's not allow the invisibleleash of our insecurities, bias
, past fears, negative self-talkor anything else to hold us
back from taking bold steps offaith.
What is bold leadership?
It's doing what God has askedus to do fully.
(18:22):
It's asking others to follow usonly as we follow Christ.
The best leadership is when ourgoal mirrors Christ's mission
to serve others.
Everything we do points toJesus, not building our
popularity or social mediafollowing, not increasing our
bank account, promoting ourproducts or agenda.
I loved that and I feel likethe focus for us as women is
(18:46):
sometimes we're so busypromoting others or just busy
helping build up everyone elsein the kingdom we stop, we
forget Our purpose is to buildup Jesus and to build up who he
is and there's stuff he put inyou that were specifically
placed there with purpose.
Yes, love, which you saidearlier about just being willing
(19:09):
to say yes, pushing past thefear, pushing past the
insecurities that's had to bethe story of my life Just say
yes to him and embrace what hehas for you.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
I love that.
I know and you know what, tracy.
One of the other things thatreally hit me and I know we're
running short on time to say yesto God is to say no to people
sometimes.
And to say yes to God is to sayyes to our self-care and yes to
taking care of the things thatneed to be taken care of in our
(19:46):
own lives.
So we can say I fully say yesto God.
How do you deal withdisappointing people now?
How do you navigate?
Speaker 4 (19:56):
that?
Yeah, that's a great question,amber, because honestly, it's a
work in process.
Because I'm a people pleaser, Iwant others to be happy, but I
think that God is, in thisseason, teaching me something
about exactly what you just saidis that if I give everything
away, then I have nothing leftfor myself or for him.
(20:19):
And he's teaching me to reallythink about what if what I'm
doing really aligns with hiswill and his plan, because I'm a
person that I could have 30things going at a time, right,
and they're all great things,good things, but they're not
necessarily God things.
And so I'm learning in thisseason to put the priority as
(20:43):
the God thing and hear God'svoice in this season.
And, honestly, he's teaching methat to say no to some things.
I don't like saying no because Ifeel like, oh, a door, oh, I
should walk through it.
But recently I've had to say no.
I'm sorry I can't do that rightnow because it resonates with
me immediately that that's notin my will house.
(21:05):
Sometimes we want to do thingsand that's it's not part of my
message.
It's great that you haveinvited me to this event, but I
can't do it because it's notresonating with me and so it's
just that inner voice that wealways hear, with God speaking
to us.
For me, it's peace.
I'm always led by, do I feelpeace, and even if I disappoint
(21:29):
a person, I'm not disappointingGod.
And but I've learned to speakmy truth in a way that is it
speaks life, not death, and Godis teaching me how to say things
too.
It's all in how things are said, right, and it's thank you, I
appreciate that, butunfortunately I'm not gonna be
able to do that right now I'mnot going to say no it is.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
It's okay, I'm learning that and there might be
someone who's listening today,who you want to walk in your
dreams, you want to walk in yourgiftings, but you're gonna have
to put some things on the tableand say maybe have to go back
to some people and say, in thisseason, god's encouraging me to
go towards this way and I can'tdo this any longer.
(22:15):
And that's a hard conversationto have.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
It is, it is.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
We need to give ourself permission to do what
God's called us to do anddisappoint some people along the
way, because I'd rather havethat, I'd rather be doing and
being fulfilled in what God'scalled me to do than help and be
fulfilling someone else's.
(22:39):
Not that we're not called tohelp.
We're just not called toeverything that comes our way
and we don't need thatdistraction.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
That you have Also the ability to discern, because
God is there with you and in youand guiding you discern what is
for you to pick up and what isfor you to put down and walk
away from.
And once again, that's justlike saying no, you don't need
permission to do what you feelyou are called to do and to
(23:09):
release those things that youfeel you're not supposed to do.
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yeah, yeah, because at the end of the day it is a
thing of I always imagine juststanding before Jesus and him
saying to me Tracy, why didn'tyou do what I asked you to do?
And then I'm making up excusesGod, I didn't want to offend and
I didn't want to shine throughwriting, I'm not really this and
(23:34):
that.
And then he just smiles andsays, man, because you didn't do
what I asked you to do, you'regoing to miss out on some stuff.
And that keeps me focused onhow to do the will of the Father
, because I love him, I want toplease him and I don't want to
miss any open door that he mighthave for me.
(23:56):
I like surprises and he oftensurprises me when I take that
risk right and do it afraid andblows my way.
It blows my mind.
What is produced when I say yes?
Speaker 3 (24:10):
It's been a great time this morning to get to talk
about this, and I can talk toyou guys all day.
I told her before we went live.
Amber and I are not verydignified, so we were one
another.
We say that all the time, butyou just made this a very easy
conversation this morning, tracy, and we're so happy to have
(24:31):
your contribution to the book.
We believe God is going to usethat chapter mightily.
We know he already is and hasbeen doing so.
We get reports from women allthe time about different ways
this book has spoke to them andyour chapter is a huge part of
how women are seeing, how theyare able to walk into their
(24:53):
gifts differently than prior toreading it.
So that whole being stucksituation.
You're doing amazing things andGod's using your words to help
women work past some difficultthings.
So thank you, thank you forthis morning.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Thank you for having me and congratulations on just
the success of the book.
God is really moving andopening doors, and isn't that
amazing, just so.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
Amber and I, the one expected most of what has been
happening.
We've just gone.
We thought we had a good idea,right, Amber?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Yes, and it's a God thing and it morphed along the
way and we're so excited thatwomen are connecting with
stories.
And then they're saying theymay not connect with a person's
story but they're like I know aperson who needs to read this
and they're giving it to theirfriends and one of the ladies is
(25:46):
giving it away and we're justexcited because one of the
realizations that I said wethought that this book was just
about empowering women to walkin God's call, but I feel like
God's going to bring in people,women, into aligning with who he
is, just because there's somany amazing stories women who
(26:11):
even don't know Jesus canconnect with and it's just a
very meeting, a very felt needthat I did not even imagine in
the, in reaching people withGod's love, and that's
incredible.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
It's obvious.
You guys said yes, and look atthe impact.
God always blows it up.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
God blows it up extendently what we could ask or
imagine if we just show up.
To just have to show up and sayyes.
Speaker 3 (26:45):
Exactly.
Speaker 4 (26:46):
Yeah, it's exciting, you guys.
Speaker 3 (26:48):
We're happy to have you along with us.
We're going to be working verydiligently on a couple of things
that we'll fill you in on hereat the end.
We are working on an audioversion of the book.
Hopefully that will come soonand very soon.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
So we hope you have a wonderful week you too, and
thanks for having me.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
In a world that often tries to confine and categorize
bestselling book, leadingLadies discover your God-grown
strategy for success celebratesthe diverse tapestry of women
just like you and their uniquejourneys of faith.
Join Lisa and I as we partnerwith over 30 women from every
hue, age and walk of life,united by one mission to let
(27:35):
Christ shine through our giftswherever we are.
Within the pages of LeadingLadies, you'll find a wealth of
wisdom, inspiration andpractical guidance.
These women share theirpersonal stories, triumphs,
failures and the lessons they'velearned along the way.
Leading Ladies is more thanjust a book.
It's a movement, a call toaction for women of faith to
(27:57):
rise up, support one another andmake a difference in the world.
Together, let's celebrate thestrength, resilience and faith
of Leading Ladies from everybackground and be inspired to
let Christ shine through yourgifts wherever you may be.
Leading Ladies, discover yourGod-grown strategy for success,
available now wherever books aresold.
Would you be surprised to know that some of
the most successful women of ourtime face challenges just like
you and I do?
Hi, I'm Amber and I'm Lisa.
We're authors of the bookLeading Ladies Discover your
God-grown strategy for success.
We invite you to join us in anhonest, messy-bun conversation
(00:30):
about the things we'd ratherkeep hidden in our lives.
Some of those things can keepus from moving forward in
purpose.
So grab a cup of somethingdelicious, kick off your shoes
and hang out with us for thenext 30 minutes.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Good morning and welcome to another coffee chat
with Amber and Lisa, and we areso happy to have a dear friend
and amazing award-winning authoron the podcast today, tracy
Hester Glass.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
We're so excited to have you with us.
For those of you that don'tknow, Tracy is one of our
contributors in the book.
Tracy officially gave uschapter two.
She is one of the firstchapters that we edited.
Her chapter is entitled StopWaiting for Permission.
We are happy to talk about that.
She has a book titled Get UpGirl, let's Go Getting Unstucked
(01:22):
and Living Free, and the bookis under Tracy Hester.
She's also a newlywed.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Yes, yeah.
Lots of stuff going on.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
You're a busy lady.
Tell us a little bit just aboutyour inspiration for that book.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Actually, lisa, my inspiration came because I was
walking through a divorce.
After 24 years of being married, I had gotten to the point
where I was on the other side ofgetting healed and I just felt
like there are so many womenthat are walking through a
divorce and just need hope.
And so it came from thatinspiration that I was ready to
(02:03):
tell my story, and I guess thatwas my first step in leading.
Both is being comfortable withtalking about the D, which is
the divorce.
I think that if you've walkedthrough a divorce, there can be
a lot of embarrassment and shameand you don't really want to
talk about it.
You just want to sweep it inthe car and say, okay, can this
(02:23):
just go away?
So it was out of obedience.
I felt like the Lord was sayingyou need to get this out, it
needs to help people, and it washealing for myself to begin to
write about it.
I had gone through an amazinghealing journey.
Often times there are stillresidue that's left over as we
(02:44):
go through a healing journey,and there still is, because when
we have trauma in our life, itis a process that we go through.
And it was all of that combined, lisa, why I wrote the book, I
didn't think that the book wasgoing to have the impact that it
is having right now because,honestly, I'm a new writer.
(03:05):
This writing game came to melater in life.
I'm not the girl that could say, oh, I was always journaling in
my diary and always dreamingabout releasing the book.
No, that's not me.
It was a gift.
Later on that, I think, cameout of desperation that I wanted
to heal and at the time I stillam the mentoring director at my
(03:29):
church and so I was mentoringwomen.
I was asking the Lord what arethe keys, god, for women to
really be set free in life andto live the victorious and
abundant life that's promised inscripture?
And so I felt like writing thatbook was a step to help them.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
I remember when you said, actually at the beginning
of this, that you went into thiswhole process thinking I'm not
even a writer, I'm a speaker, Idon't want to write a book.
But Tracy actually was thefirst one to finish a chapter in
this book, because I was on thephone with her talking about
(04:07):
Get Up, girl, let's Go, and wewere working on that cover
project and I started talking toher about the idea of leading
without permission and so shewrote that chapter and it
released some things in me thatmade me be able to tell my story
, and I think that's one of thepowerful things of telling our
(04:29):
stories that it makes it that werelease people to tell their
stories and live in transparencyand vulnerability and get those
old things that are draggingalong like a dead horse off of
us.
Yeah, one of those things thatyou said, a lady came to, came
to you and she saw that you wereholding something back.
(04:51):
Is it because of shame orbecause you don't want to shine
too bright?
So great Paradox.
Let me pull some things apart inmy story and say, okay, I'm
going to be real, real, honest,let's be honest.
And if I was trying, if I wastransparent enough to walk
through it.
Let's be transparent enough touse that to help some people.
(05:13):
And so I was so thankfulbecause that didn't even that,
just didn't even only help thebook.
It helped me and the power oftransformation and that's the
power of vulnerability.
But, tracy, tell me, before,before you walked out, before
you walked into divorce, wereyou already in ministry?
Speaker 4 (05:36):
I was.
Yeah, we were both in ministryand I think that's what made it
more shameful that they shouldknow better.
We should be able to figurethis out and yeah, and so I felt
, when it happened, that I wasnow disqualified D divorce,
disqualified from serving in anyway, and so I took a step back
(06:00):
and at the time it wasn'tnegative.
I took a step back to heal,because we can only lead out of
our own deliverance and our ownhealing in life.
I can't mentor anybody if I'mbroken.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
What did you in that process of healing?
I know a lot of people turn toa lot of different things.
Some people return to counsel.
What steps did you take to heal?
What did God lead you to towatch your heart come back to a
healthy space?
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Lisa, honestly, I didn't know the steps initially,
so I did what was comfortableand I was hiding, I was faking
it.
You know how you'd have thisdeep gut pain that's going on.
You still need to show up, needto show up for work, need to
show up for my kids, need toshow up right, because only the
(06:50):
strong survive.
And so I was showing up like Ishow up, smile on the face, pain
, the pain I've never, uh, dealtwith before emotionally like
this.
And so one day, my daughter,who had come home that year from
college.
I came downstairs and she hadleft me a note on an napkin and
(07:11):
it said mom, I need you tosurvive.
And I realized at that pointthat I'm not doing a good job of
faking it, I'm not doing thisright.
And so it was at that pointthat I reached out to someone
and I began counseling and Ispent two years in with a
wonderful woman who is Iconsider her my spiritual mentor
(07:34):
, and she really transformed,helped me see how God sees me,
even though I'm walking throughthis divorce.
And how do I come out this aspure goal, how do I still give
God glory in the face of chaos?
And, wow, that was such avaluable time, and so I know
that was orchestrated by theLord for me to go through that
(07:56):
process so that I could write achapter in the 80s, right a book
and do the ministry that I did.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
Wow, have you written this chapter for us, your own
book?
You have an establishedministry.
You are going places andspreading a message to help
other women go through this.
I just want to make sure thatour listeners know Tracy does
have a website, tracyhestercom,and can people contact you for
(08:27):
things through your website?
Absolutely.
I'm very excited about anotherproject that you are doing.
Every once in a while I willcatch videos on social media
that Tracy has put out.
She is doing a project with herdaughter, courtney.
It's called mommy issues.
Tell me about this project alittle bit, because I think this
(08:50):
is something many women motherdaughters, even mother sons.
It's a little different dynamic, but I'm excited about it okay,
my daughter Courtney, she'samazing, do you ever?
Speaker 4 (09:01):
because are you both mothers, right?
You both have daughters.
Okay, it's like you look atyour daughters at their age and
I said, man, I wish I was aswise as she is and her age, and
so she's just a real old soul,lots of wisdom.
But one thing about my daughterthat I admire most about her is
she's very courageous.
She's so much more courageousthan I was, she's so much more
(09:25):
bold than I was at her age, andshe won't be 30 this year and
she just received her doctorateof psychology.
And so for the last five yearsor more, because she was an
undergrad and then masters andthen her doctor program, she is
a psychologist and so years agowe had an idea to do mommy
(09:47):
issues.
And because you don't hearpeople talking about issues with
their moms you'll hear daddyissues but you don't hear about
mommy issues and I think thatthere's this underlining respect
that I'll talk about my mother.
I'm not gonna go there with mymother, not gonna.
But we had the idea.
It was on the table because,just busyness, she had a baby,
(10:10):
I'm doing certain things andthen two years ago, her and her
husband came to live with me.
They were saving money onincome family.
My son in love was just working,my daughter was in school and
then she was pregnant and at thetime she was dealing with some
joint pain and she was havingsome issues.
And so she said mom, can wecome live with you?
(10:32):
Sure, they lived with me for ayear and a half and we noticed
that we had some issues.
The whole issue of mommy issuesbecame a lie.
Before it was a cute idea, oh,we should do this, and now it
was like, ooh, this is real, wereally do have issues, right.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
We do have an issue right here in record.
Speaker 4 (10:54):
And so we decided because the original idea was to
do record it and to help people.
But now we said, okay, let's doit.
And so we sat down on aSaturday for about four hours
and we recorded in some candidconversation of unslip and
(11:15):
talked about the divorce, talkedabout stuff like mom, why
didn't you talk about it?
Why didn't you help me duringthat season?
And I had to be honest, Icouldn't.
When you're going throughsomething so traumatic, you go
into like survival mode, right,and I'm trying to survive, I'm
(11:37):
trying to help myself.
We can't minister to others.
We're drowning.
Can't save you if I'm drowning.
So those were the kinds ofconversations that we had.
And then it's not just that shehad issues with me, but the
whole point of the podcast toois for daughters and mothers to
(11:57):
understand that mommies haveissues too.
We're not super women.
We don't wear capes 24-7.
We have blood in our veins andwe're human, because at times I
think children don't see moms ashuman.
That was the inspiration in whywe recorded mommy issues.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I think sometimes our tendency is we either we're
going women, we do a couple ofdifferent things.
Either we just like to act likethings aren't happening, I'll
just deal with it.
We kind of martyr.
I'll put it on my own behindclosed doors, I don't want to
take anybody with me.
Or we take the other turn.
We start to worry abouteveryone else.
(12:41):
How can I help them?
Oh no, I'll deal with me later.
Let me put them first.
And all of that kind of tiesinto it even goes back to your
book Girl, get Up, girl and Go.
Because, in all honesty, wekeep ourselves in a space to
where we're really not steppinginto where we need to be what
God's called us to do.
(13:02):
We're so busy trying toprivately not bring anything on
anybody else or take care ofeveryone else.
We don't do business at hand.
What kind of things did youhave to do to finally start
stepping out in boldness, takingthe bull by the horns?
That's a good question.
Speaker 4 (13:22):
Lisa, I think it started with me understanding my
value as a woman.
You know, this morning I wasreading in Proverbs 31, and
verse 18 really jumped out at me, and I couldn't even finish
reading the rest of the chapter,because what it said is that
(13:43):
she sees her merchandise as good, and I didn't see my
merchandise as good, I saw it asdamaged.
In you're in a singing groupyou might sing.
In you're the background singeroh, I could be a good
background singer, but God wascalling me to lead, take a lead
(14:06):
in the band, in my circle ofinfluence.
And so it's getting to thepoint of just saying, yes, god,
I will step out, even though Ifeel insecure, intimidated and
not prepared.
Right?
So really it was overcomingsome insecurities and learning
(14:27):
the value of just saying yes toGod, right?
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I love that.
I love that she sees hermerchandise as good.
She sees it as good Because Goddoes not treat our gifts like
we're in the bargain basement ofwe.
We are equal in whatever wehave and we don't see we're
wanting to compare ourmerchandise with other people's
(14:54):
merchandise.
They're Delce and Gabana andI'm like Walmart special, blue
Light special.
That is not.
That's not who we serve, and wewant to know that all that we
have to offer is of value.
We all have something veryvaluable to offer.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
So incredible.
I'm glad they brought thatfirst to our attention today.
Speaker 4 (15:23):
And you know, what I noticed to Amber is that the
merchandise that she wasreferring to was nothing of her
outward, it was all her inward,her character, her how God
gifted her and saying I'mputting it on display Was hot,
she was bad.
If you read it, what she stuff,she did, man, she was something
(15:46):
else and I just believe thatProverbs 31 is really a model
for us.
It's not, it's nothing.
You know how you say, oh, Iwant to be a Proverbs 31 woman,
a man.
Or saying, oh, I want my wifeto be a Proverbs 31 woman.
You know what.
She's nothing to be intimidatedabout, saying, oh, no, I can't
be her.
It's just something for us togrow and see her character and
(16:08):
how blessed she was because sheknew who she was in God and she
was not holding back.
She had the ministry to me ofduplication and multiplication
times 10 of the things that werecoming out of her and I was
inspired this morning as I wasreading about her that her
merchandise was good and that iswhat we as women have to begin
(16:31):
to see as our merchandises.
I'm valuable, I bring somethingto the table, my voice needs to
be heard because God has givenme something to say.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
We have a.
We were at the NationalReligious Broadcasters
conference and one of the womenthat were signing their books
and her name escapes me, she'san ASSA.
I know she's in the AdvancedWriters and Speakers and
Associates wrote a book on theProverbs 31 woman and she did it
.
Basically, speaking from theaspect of what does it mean to
(17:03):
be a Proverbs 31 woman.
We hear this word virtuous, wethink about different emotions
and really what the Hebrew wordmeans.
In there, that word virtuousalmost seems like an
unattainable thing.
And then you read all thethings that she does and you're
going, oh, I'm not virtuous, Ican't do that.
But really what that word meansis wrong.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
And wisdom.
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
It's okay.
Some of us have had to learn tobe strong.
We've been strong at differentpoints in our life.
But that seems a little bitmore like with God's help, we
can do that.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
Absolutely.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
I want to read a little bit from your book.
I have some words that I reallyappreciate.
When we get to the close ofyour chapter, you talk about how
you have God's permission toshine bright.
You don't really need anyoneelse's permission, it's God's
permission that counts.
And you say God is compellingus to lead boldly with a fresh
(18:00):
perspective, with Jesusperspective.
His goal is to fulfill the willof his father.
So let's not allow the invisibleleash of our insecurities, bias
, past fears, negative self-talkor anything else to hold us
back from taking bold steps offaith.
What is bold leadership?
It's doing what God has askedus to do fully.
(18:22):
It's asking others to follow usonly as we follow Christ.
The best leadership is when ourgoal mirrors Christ's mission
to serve others.
Everything we do points toJesus, not building our
popularity or social mediafollowing, not increasing our
bank account, promoting ourproducts or agenda.
I loved that and I feel likethe focus for us as women is
(18:46):
sometimes we're so busypromoting others or just busy
helping build up everyone elsein the kingdom we stop, we
forget Our purpose is to buildup Jesus and to build up who he
is and there's stuff he put inyou that were specifically
placed there with purpose.
Yes, love, which you saidearlier about just being willing
(19:09):
to say yes, pushing past thefear, pushing past the
insecurities that's had to bethe story of my life Just say
yes to him and embrace what hehas for you.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
I love that.
I know and you know what, tracy.
One of the other things thatreally hit me and I know we're
running short on time to say yesto God is to say no to people
sometimes.
And to say yes to God is to sayyes to our self-care and yes to
taking care of the things thatneed to be taken care of in our
(19:46):
own lives.
So we can say I fully say yesto God.
How do you deal withdisappointing people now?
How do you navigate?
Speaker 4 (19:56):
that?
Yeah, that's a great question,amber, because honestly, it's a
work in process.
Because I'm a people pleaser, Iwant others to be happy, but I
think that God is, in thisseason, teaching me something
about exactly what you just saidis that if I give everything
away, then I have nothing leftfor myself or for him.
(20:19):
And he's teaching me to reallythink about what if what I'm
doing really aligns with hiswill and his plan, because I'm a
person that I could have 30things going at a time, right,
and they're all great things,good things, but they're not
necessarily God things.
And so I'm learning in thisseason to put the priority as
(20:43):
the God thing and hear God'svoice in this season.
And, honestly, he's teaching methat to say no to some things.
I don't like saying no because Ifeel like, oh, a door, oh, I
should walk through it.
But recently I've had to say no.
I'm sorry I can't do that rightnow because it resonates with
me immediately that that's notin my will house.
(21:05):
Sometimes we want to do thingsand that's it's not part of my
message.
It's great that you haveinvited me to this event, but I
can't do it because it's notresonating with me and so it's
just that inner voice that wealways hear, with God speaking
to us.
For me, it's peace.
I'm always led by, do I feelpeace, and even if I disappoint
(21:29):
a person, I'm not disappointingGod.
And but I've learned to speakmy truth in a way that is it
speaks life, not death, and Godis teaching me how to say things
too.
It's all in how things are said, right, and it's thank you, I
appreciate that, butunfortunately I'm not gonna be
able to do that right now I'mnot going to say no it is.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
It's okay, I'm learning that and there might be
someone who's listening today,who you want to walk in your
dreams, you want to walk in yourgiftings, but you're gonna have
to put some things on the tableand say maybe have to go back
to some people and say, in thisseason, god's encouraging me to
go towards this way and I can'tdo this any longer.
(22:15):
And that's a hard conversationto have.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
It is, it is.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
We need to give ourself permission to do what
God's called us to do anddisappoint some people along the
way, because I'd rather havethat, I'd rather be doing and
being fulfilled in what God'scalled me to do than help and be
fulfilling someone else's.
(22:39):
Not that we're not called tohelp.
We're just not called toeverything that comes our way
and we don't need thatdistraction.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
That you have Also the ability to discern, because
God is there with you and in youand guiding you discern what is
for you to pick up and what isfor you to put down and walk
away from.
And once again, that's justlike saying no, you don't need
permission to do what you feelyou are called to do and to
(23:09):
release those things that youfeel you're not supposed to do.
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yeah, yeah, because at the end of the day it is a
thing of I always imagine juststanding before Jesus and him
saying to me Tracy, why didn'tyou do what I asked you to do?
And then I'm making up excusesGod, I didn't want to offend and
I didn't want to shine throughwriting, I'm not really this and
(23:34):
that.
And then he just smiles andsays, man, because you didn't do
what I asked you to do, you'regoing to miss out on some stuff.
And that keeps me focused onhow to do the will of the Father
, because I love him, I want toplease him and I don't want to
miss any open door that he mighthave for me.
(23:56):
I like surprises and he oftensurprises me when I take that
risk right and do it afraid andblows my way.
It blows my mind.
What is produced when I say yes?
Speaker 3 (24:10):
It's been a great time this morning to get to talk
about this, and I can talk toyou guys all day.
I told her before we went live.
Amber and I are not verydignified, so we were one
another.
We say that all the time, butyou just made this a very easy
conversation this morning, tracy, and we're so happy to have
(24:31):
your contribution to the book.
We believe God is going to usethat chapter mightily.
We know he already is and hasbeen doing so.
We get reports from women allthe time about different ways
this book has spoke to them andyour chapter is a huge part of
how women are seeing, how theyare able to walk into their
(24:53):
gifts differently than prior toreading it.
So that whole being stucksituation.
You're doing amazing things andGod's using your words to help
women work past some difficultthings.
So thank you, thank you forthis morning.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Thank you for having me and congratulations on just
the success of the book.
God is really moving andopening doors, and isn't that
amazing, just so.
Speaker 3 (25:18):
Amber and I, the one expected most of what has been
happening.
We've just gone.
We thought we had a good idea,right, Amber?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Yes, and it's a God thing and it morphed along the
way and we're so excited thatwomen are connecting with
stories.
And then they're saying theymay not connect with a person's
story but they're like I know aperson who needs to read this
and they're giving it to theirfriends and one of the ladies is
(25:46):
giving it away and we're justexcited because one of the
realizations that I said wethought that this book was just
about empowering women to walkin God's call, but I feel like
God's going to bring in people,women, into aligning with who he
is, just because there's somany amazing stories women who
(26:11):
even don't know Jesus canconnect with and it's just a
very meeting, a very felt needthat I did not even imagine in
the, in reaching people withGod's love, and that's
incredible.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
It's obvious.
You guys said yes, and look atthe impact.
God always blows it up.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
God blows it up extendently what we could ask or
imagine if we just show up.
To just have to show up and sayyes.
Speaker 3 (26:45):
Exactly.
Speaker 4 (26:46):
Yeah, it's exciting, you guys.
Speaker 3 (26:48):
We're happy to have you along with us.
We're going to be working verydiligently on a couple of things
that we'll fill you in on hereat the end.
We are working on an audioversion of the book.
Hopefully that will come soonand very soon.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
So we hope you have a wonderful week you too, and
thanks for having me.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
In a world that often tries to confine and categorize
bestselling book, leadingLadies discover your God-grown
strategy for success celebratesthe diverse tapestry of women
just like you and their uniquejourneys of faith.
Join Lisa and I as we partnerwith over 30 women from every
hue, age and walk of life,united by one mission to let
(27:35):
Christ shine through our giftswherever we are.
Within the pages of LeadingLadies, you'll find a wealth of
wisdom, inspiration andpractical guidance.
These women share theirpersonal stories, triumphs,
failures and the lessons they'velearned along the way.
Leading Ladies is more thanjust a book.
It's a movement, a call toaction for women of faith to
(27:57):
rise up, support one another andmake a difference in the world.
Together, let's celebrate thestrength, resilience and faith
of Leading Ladies from everybackground and be inspired to
let Christ shine through yourgifts wherever you may be.
Leading Ladies, discover yourGod-grown strategy for success,
available now wherever books aresold.
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