Because of Them: Pride Then, Pride Now | Pride Arc Finale | Ep 23 - Coffee with Gays™: Every Sip Is A Story

Episode Transcript
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Blaine (00:05):
Welcome to Coffee with Gaze.
I'm Blaine and I'm Reid, andthis is the finale to our Pride
episode.
Actually, and we're titlingthis one Because of them
Remembering the Icons BehindPride and what Pride Means to Us
.
Today We've done athree-episode Pride arc and this
episode today I would call alove letter to the icons of the

(00:28):
people who kind of made Prideand a reminder that kind of we
have the next chapter to writein our generation.
So what do you think, reed?

Reed (00:41):
I support you, Blaine.

Blaine (00:44):
How was your Pride?
You didn't do anything, did you?
No as we discussed.
I'm going to cut you off.
I went to Sitges Pride inBarcelona.

Reed (00:53):
What you went to Sitges, sitges.

Blaine (00:56):
Sitges.
It's a gay beach town inBarcelona.
If you haven't been, I totallyrecommend it.
It's one of the coolest placesin Spain and it's just 20
minutes outside of Barcelona andI think the coolest thing about
it and I'm just going to bereal controversial here I really
don't like people fromBarcelona.
I'm sorry, this is like mysecond time in Barcelona.

(01:18):
I'm just no.
I love the rest of Spain.
I love Madrid.
I could move there in aheartbeat.
It's like a metropolitan NewYork.
But you know Barcelona doesn'tdo it for me.
But Sitges love it and I thinkthe reason I like it is because
there aren't really people fromBarcelona in Sitges.
It's all like the rest ofEurope.

Reed (01:40):
So what's wrong with the people of Barcelona?

Blaine (01:43):
They're snobby.

Reed (01:45):
I meant to ask hey Blaine, welcome back from Spain, how
was your trip?

Blaine (01:49):
Thank you.
I'm a little tan and veryexcited about it.
It was a great time.
It was my friend's 40thbirthday.
We had a fabulous time.
But, yeah, love Stitches.
Pride Parade was absolutelyincredible, super fun.
It wasn't as packed as Ithought it would be, but I think
that was great.

Reed (02:07):
So yeah, now my question did you guys already know that
the Pride stuff was going on?
So that's why you strategicallyplanned.

Blaine (02:13):
We put ourselves in that situation.

Reed (02:16):
Got it, got it yeah.

Blaine (02:18):
Yeah, you would not have done that.
I have a feeling.

Reed (02:21):
I mean not that I would.
I would have definitely gone toSpain.
So next time you guys are goingto Spain, yes, I'll hitch a
ride, but I probably would nothave been a part of the pride
stuff now still not a pride fanno, it's just not me, sorry,
it's just, I'm not a pride guy.

Blaine (02:38):
I also think we have to get a little bit of housekeeping
out of the way for Coffee withK's.
You said something um in aprevious episode that you want
to apologize for.

Reed (02:46):
Yes, I'd like to apologize for using the term polygamy.
Again, no judgment to anyrelationship out there.
My apologies for using the termpolygamy.

Blaine (02:58):
That was really controversial.
People really had a lot to sayon social about that one.

Reed (03:02):
I like to think that I did address it when it did happen,
right yeah?

Blaine (03:07):
you did, but you're just Mr Monogamous, and that's just
all there is to it.

Reed (03:12):
Well, let me also say I am no saint, I'm you know we know
that.

Blaine (03:18):
We definitely know your number isn't 20.

Reed (03:20):
It's probably way lower.
Um sorry, but yes I, it'sprobably way lower, it's higher,
but yes, yeah, I'm no judgment.
I support everybody.
It's all about love.

Blaine (03:31):
All about love.
Well, speaking of you know, wehave been running our first
series sets of series, so tospeak, on our Coffee with Gay
social channels.
The first one was Because ofthem looking back on the lives
that made Pride possible,Something that I've been doing a
little bit solo, but I enjoyedit a lot, Really looking at the
gay icon.
So we're going to talk aboutthat this episode.

(03:51):
But before we start and dive into the whole shebang, I wanted
to do a game, because we haven'tdone a game in like forever.
I don't think you and I havejust done a game.

Reed (04:00):
Oh, shit, a game.

Blaine (04:02):
No, I'm actually really super excited about this one and
it's titled Did that Gay ThingActually Happen?
And I'm going to give you fourmultiple choice questions, okay,
and only one of the options isreal, and three things are just
kind of made up and so you'regoing to have to guess which one

(04:23):
is real and which one isn't sothe only one of the four things
is real.
All right, shoot.
Okay, hit me.
Multiple choice, okay, ready,I'm ready.
Read which one of theseactually happened.
In the 1990s, a group of dragqueens in texas legally adopted
each other to create a chosenfamily tree.
That's option A.

(04:44):
B a San Francisco lesbian baronce accepted live chickens as a
cover charge.
C a trans activist once threw ahigh heel at a senator during a
hearing on marriage equality.
And then Marsha P Johnsonmodeled for Andy Warhol.

Reed (05:01):
I think it's going to be C or D.

Blaine (05:04):
You have to pick one, you can't just pick two.

Reed (05:07):
I live in the gray area, Blaine, no there's no gray area
in Multiple Choice.

Blaine (05:10):
Did you take the?

Reed (05:11):
SAT.
I actually didn't, okay, well,there's no gray areas.

Blaine (05:15):
Let's go with C?
C.
That is wrong.
Marsha P Johnson did indeedmodel for Andy Warhol.
That bitch p johnson did indeedmodel for andy warhol.
That which it's actuallyamazing, it's um and I'll put
photos of it, ladies andgentlemen series in the 1970s
where she was glan glammed upand it was like portraits of
drag queens and transgenderindividuals.

(05:36):
Okay, which one of these was areal moment in gay history?
Uh, one, a group of of queernuns chain themselves to a
cathedral altar to protest thePope.
Okay.
In 1980s, a Chicago gay barhosted Ronald Reagan look-alike
contest where the winner was alesbian in full drag.

(05:56):
C Bayard Rustin helped writespeeches for MLK and advised
Coretta Scott King on how tothrow a proper cocktail party.
D in 1977, protesters threwcream pies in Anita Bryan's face
on live television.

Reed (06:14):
I'm going to go with C.

Blaine (06:17):
You know what?
It was?
A partial.
That was a partial.
That's a little tricky of me.
It's actually D Anita Bryan gotfull pied on live TV in 1997.
Do you know who Anita Bryan was?
The crazy religious lunatic?

Reed (06:30):
Yeah, I look up her recipes online all the time.

Blaine (06:34):
No, you don't.
Oh my God, this video was socrazy.
She was just spewing hate onlive TV and then literally some
guy just came up and just fullon put a pie in her face.
Yeah, southern Baptist, crazylady.
And then literally some guyjust came up and just full on
put a pie in her face.
Yeah, southern Baptist, crazylady.
Which one of these is actuallyreal A the original rainbow flag
design included glitter sewninto the fabric for gay sparkle

(06:58):
power.
A gay couple.
B A gay couple in 1960s, northCarolina got arrested for
cohabitating in matching robes.
C in 1983, lesbians in Bostonstarted a pirate radio station
called Dyke Airwaves.
And.
D a group of lesbians formed acoalition called the Blood
Sisters to generate blood duringthe AIDS crisis.

Reed (07:22):
It's either B or D.

Blaine (07:24):
But you can't exist in the gray area, Reed.
We already talked about it.
Rules the rules.
Pick B, D.

Reed (07:30):
I feel like B you threw in the robes.

Blaine (07:36):
Really.
Clearly, you didn't watch,because of them, our series, so
it was D.
It is D.
Yeah, the Blood Sisters wereactually real and that was their
name and they had banners andeverything and it actually was
really one of my favoriteepisodes that I recorded.
So, okay, okay.

(07:56):
Last question which of these isa real gay historical event?
A 19th century drag queen sothat'd be 1800s, just so you
know got arrested for hostingillegal drag balls and demanded
a presidential pardon.
In 1982, lesbians in Portlandformed a motorcycle gang that
only allowed members who coulddeadlift their own weight In C.

(08:20):
In 1979, a gay man in Ohiotried to legally marry himself
so he could get health insurance.
And then D RuPaul once ran forthe mayor of San Francisco as a
joke campaign called Wigs andTaxes.

Reed (08:36):
I'm going to go with D.

Blaine (08:39):
That is wrong.
I think you've gotten all ofthese wrong.
It is actually a 19th centurydrag queen got arrested for
hosting illegal drag balls anddemanded a presidential pardon.
We will talk about him again.
If you had watched Because ofthem, our series, you would know
that read.

Reed (08:59):
I'm just so a part of it that I didn't think that I
needed to watch it.

Blaine (09:02):
You just didn't need to watch and didn't have to
understand our history.
Well good, it'll be a goodlearning experience for you.
So this year 2025 Pride Verydifferent, I think, from
previous Prides, probably overthe last decade Did you do any
stateside Pride celebrating?
No, I didn't.
I heard about Dallas's pride,but here's the deal.

(09:25):
You know, pride used to be inour local gay neighborhoods and
then somehow I feel like a bunchof straight people that do all
the permitting and stuff decidedthat we can no longer be in our
gay neighborhoods and now wehad to go to awful places.
So downtown LA is host LA prideinstead of West Hollywood and
it's basically in Chinatown,which makes zero sense.

(09:47):
In Dallas, we have an unfairpark, which is this depressing
place where it's only coolduring the state fair.

Reed (09:54):
Wait a minute.
I thought I thought WeHo wasWest Hollywood and I thought
that was the cool part.
I've never been to California.

Blaine (10:02):
It is.
They have WeHo Pride now, whichis like a week before, and it's
kind of like what we're doinghere in Dallas, where we have
our own gay pride parade inSeptember, like we used to do,
but the official parades, likethe official prides and
festivals are now in these likefar off areas that aren't in our
gay neighborhoods.

(10:22):
It's ridiculous.
I mean we have like rainbowplastered streets in Cedar
Springs, yeah, but we used tohave our parade like on those
streets and now they have it atFair Park, which is like a
depressing concrete jungle.
It's because they said thatthere was too much traffic and

(10:44):
that it was dangerous, and it'sjust bullshit.

Reed (10:47):
Well, I mean think about it this way, not to take side of
the city planner or whomever isin charge of this, but have
other events also been moved to,like Fair Park?

Blaine (11:00):
No, just the state fair.

Reed (11:02):
Oh, so you're telling me that they're having full on
parades of other.

Blaine (11:06):
Well, I don't even know of any other parades that we
have.

Reed (11:09):
Okay, and that's my point.

Blaine (11:11):
I mean it's ridiculous.
And you know they did the samething in LA and they've done it
all over the place.
Basically, here's my take thestraights are trying to kick us
out of our neighborhoods andwe're done with it.
And that brings me into theintro to our episode.
I'm so excited about Pride thisyear.
You know why?
Why, I feel like we finallytook our pride back this year

(11:33):
because it used to be like allthese corporate sponsors.
It was like IBM would changetheir stupid logo.
Ibm really Like, why would youhave like an IBM logo?
That's a pride logo, that's astupid, it's the most boring
company in the world.
And you're going to have aPride logo Dumb.
And then you have Target thathad, like I don't know, these
huge displays of Pridemerchandise which just kept
getting more and more outrageousevery single year.

(11:55):
Last year they were liketargeting children caused a huge
uproar.
This year it was like a tinylittle, like nothing thing.
And you know what?
I'm fine with it.
I'm absolutely fine with it.

Reed (12:08):
You seem very fine with it .
You seem kind of angry about it.

Blaine (12:14):
I am angry about it Because look, here's the deal
too Like a lot of straightpeople move into our gay
neighborhoods.
They want to take over.
You go to West Hollywood, forexample, where I also used to
live, and what happens?
Vanderpump puts in that stupidtom tom restaurant and a bunch
of straight people go and havetheir dates there it's not tom
tom, it's called like it'scalled tom tom.
It was called pump pumps closed.

(12:35):
Now why it's she closed it?
Who knows, because it wasn'tpopular anymore.
I don't know.
But tom tom is still open.
And guess who goes there?
Not gay people, only freakingstraight people.
You go there and there's a tonof straight people on dates.
What guy is taking a girl tothe gay neighborhood for a date?
I do not get it.

Reed (12:54):
Do you think that, like there are many situations,
circumstances that could behappening here, right, the guy
could be gay and that could behis girl, best friend, A right
the guy could?
Be gay and that could be hisgirl best friend a b?
Um.
The girl said babe take me to.

Blaine (13:11):
You know, whatever, they love that Vanderpump show and
that's why they want to do it.
And it's just gross to me likewe, we don't have a lot of
spaces, you know.
It's not like we take up a lotof space, like the straights
take up all space, and it's likethe girls that bring their
bachelorette parties to our bartoo.
Like I'm over that too, I am.
Don't you expect me to comeentertain you at our gay bar,

(13:32):
especially if you don't have agay friend with you.

Reed (13:34):
So Blaine dislikes bachelorette parties?
No, as much as I dislike therainbow flag.

Blaine (13:41):
Look, I don't mind a bachelorette party, as long as
you're one respectful and two.
Ideally, if you go to a gay bar, have a gay friend with you.
We are not here to entertainyou.
Does that make sense?

Reed (13:55):
I mean, I'm pretty entertaining sometimes when I'm
drinking.
I'm pretty entertaining, Idon't care.

Blaine (13:59):
I know the gays are very entertaining, so I get the lure
and the draw, but it's justgotten a little ridiculous.

Reed (14:04):
Why do we have to segregate?

Blaine (14:07):
I'll tell you why.
It's because a lot of like whathas happened with Pride, for
example.
So over the last 10 years, wesaw this like huge, inclusive
move that all these companieswere doing.
The reality of the situation is, they took over Pride, they
started sponsoring it andbecause they started sponsoring
it, it was all of a sudden hadbecome kid friendly.
Like what?
Like Pride has never been a kidfriendly event.

(14:29):
It's always guys dancing inSpeedos and doing whatever they
want.
Like now should it be lewd?
I don't think so, but at thesame time, like we should be
able to have fun.
This is not a child's event,and the fact that I still see
people on social media sayingthat Pride Festival should be
some kind of child event is justridiculous to me.

(14:50):
It's basically like saying likeoh, we should have
five-year-olds at Coachella.

Reed (14:55):
Like that's dumb.
I see your point and Iunderstand your frustration.
However, I think it's more thanjust that.
I think you should take abreather on the bachelorette
parties.
They're bringing in money,they're bringing in revenue.
They're bringing in income.

Blaine (15:14):
Usually they expect me to buy them drinks and that's
not happening.
One just not, and two I justthink they're usually rude and
disrespectful and they scream inyour face and they expect you
to entertain them, and I'm notyour entertainment as a gay man.
That's my point.

Reed (15:30):
I feel like you could easily get screamed in the face
by an upset gay man.
But yes, I support you.

Blaine (15:37):
But you know what?
It's our gay bar and it's meantfor gay people.
Period, okay, and you know whatit's meant for gay people Period
Okay, and you know what Fliesare welcome, but it's just
gotten to the point wherestraight people make decisions
for our gay community and that'swhere I draw the line.
That's happened with Pride,with this corporate sponsorship
thing, with things like pronounsand DEI and whatever else, and

(16:02):
I'm just freaking sick of it.
It's our community and it's notall these straight people that
get involved that know nothingabout it.
They don't know our experience,they don't know what we go
through and they pretend to andthey pretend to care about us
once a year.
Who really cares?

Reed (16:16):
You really think that they just pretend to care about us?
Yeah?

Blaine (16:18):
1000%.
I mean again.

Reed (16:21):
You think?

Blaine (16:21):
the CEO.
Stop.
You think the CEO of IBM caresabout you because his logo is
rainbow.

Reed (16:26):
I mean no.
So let me.
Let me put it to you this waythe one stupid thing that the
CEO of Chick-fil-A did, forexample, was announce that he
was against gay marriage, forexample, against gay marriage,
for example.
Now, for every one of you thathave gotten upset that the CEO

(16:48):
of Chick-fil-A has said this,you know outwardly, publicly,
whatever.
Have you ever thought toyourself the numerous Fortune
500 companies that you probablyprovide revenue to by purchasing
their products?
Did you ever think for a secondthat maybe their CEO also feels

(17:09):
the same way?

Blaine (17:10):
Yeah, for sure, and they've been pandering this
whole time with this prideridiculousness and guess what?
This is the first year I didn'tgo on every website and have a
rainbow logo and I'm fine withit.

Reed (17:20):
Yeah, because the rainbow logo is tacky as fuck.

Blaine (17:22):
By the way, leave us the hell alone.
It's our community.
That's my point.
Yeah, because the rainbow logois tacky as fuck.
99% of US companies pulled backon their pride sponsorships

(17:42):
this year, and I think thebiggest one was the Boise Parade
.
They and Utah.
They lost like $400,000.

Reed (17:51):
You said Boise Utah.

Blaine (17:53):
No Boise Idaho.

Reed (17:55):
And then the Salt.

Blaine (17:55):
Lake City, Utah pride too.
They each lost like 400 grandin corporate sponsorships.
And then New York pride lostsomething like $750,000 in
corporate sponsorships.
But the reality is, here's thedeal.
Pride used to be fun because itwas basically the gay bars that
would put the floats together.
We didn't need Disney andT-Mobile and freaking whoever.

Reed (18:18):
Okay, first of all, let me stop you for a second.

Blaine (18:20):
Wait, and some stupid like bank card like Capital One
putting together a float.
Okay, well, did you ever thinkthat maybe these corporations
and some stupid like bank cardlike Capital One?

Reed (18:25):
putting together a float.
Okay Well, did you ever thinkthat maybe these corporations
started this?

Blaine (18:30):
God, you're pissing me off.

Reed (18:32):
I'm just saying Do you not think that some group of gay
people didn't complain aboutthis, and that's why the
corporations.

Blaine (18:43):
No, no, no, I have been in the boardroom on this one.
I know exactly what it is.
It's pandering and it's because, after gay marriage was
legalized, the entire countrystarted shifting towards
accepting gay people then, andthat's when all of this started.
By the way, it started with thewhite house lighting up in
pride colors, having a prideflag, which was great.
It was a monumental experience,you know, a monumental thing

(19:06):
that happened in our history.
I'm fine with that.
But then it turned into thispandering year after year after
year.
Then it turned into like justcorporate greed of like let's
just sell all the pride merch wecan for Walmart or Target.
Have you seen that Walmartmerch?
It's tacky AF.
No gay person is wearing it.

Reed (19:26):
That's not true.
I see a lot of gay dudeswearing rainbow shit.

Blaine (19:30):
Okay, first of all, most of our Pride merch is pretty
tacky unless it's done by anon-corporate person like
somebody cool on Etsy orsomething like that.
We have Pride merch, not usCoffee with Gays.
I'm saying people that wearcool pride stuff like that,
stuff's found like somewhereelse there is there cool pride
stuff well, I can tell you it'sdefinitely not a target in

(19:52):
walmart.
Okay, that's for sure.
It's not and it never should bewell, I don't recall.

Reed (20:01):
And again, this is just.
This is from mr anti-pride, notanti-pride, but just not.
You don't recall.
And again, this is just.
This is from Mr Anti-pride, notanti-pride, but just not.

Blaine (20:07):
You don't have to be anti-pride.
You're the one that wanted todo this pride.

Reed (20:12):
Oh well, I was just saying , cause it is pride month, you
know.
Oh, let's, let's do some ride,but um, I don pre-Pulse
nightclub.

Blaine (20:26):
It really started well, 2016.
Yeah, but that was also gaymarriage too.
It all happened at the sametime.

Reed (20:34):
Was gay marriage before or after the shooting?
The shooting was June 12th.
Are you looking that up rightnow?

Blaine (20:39):
Of course I am.

Reed (20:40):
Yep, you tapped those fingers.
Producer.

Blaine (20:44):
It was actually 2015, which is what I thought, so that
happened a year later.
But my point is, that's whenthe momentum started, and then
it just got like really out of.

Reed (20:55):
I think I, honest to God, think it blew up because as, as
a resident Orlando resident,when pulse nightclub happened I
had never seen.
So, prime example, the Sundaymorning, uh, after the pole
shooting.
So the shooting occurred June12th, saturday night, sunday
morning, chick-fil-a that wasright down the street from Pulse

(21:18):
Nightclub opened up and made abunch of food and brought it
over to all the victims and thefamilies and everything else.

Blaine (21:27):
Oh, that was nice of them.

Reed (21:28):
It gives me goosebumps to this day, so that's why I get so
upset whenever people are allanti-Chick-fil-A, like I was
there when they opened up forpolls.

Blaine (21:37):
By the way, I'm going to get like dude.
This is a dirty little secret.
You know who eats the mostChick-fil-A?
Gay people.

Reed (21:44):
I mean literally.

Blaine (21:50):
Gay people work at Chick-fil-A.
Gay men eat so much Chick-fil-Aand they're really secret about
it.
It's like a thing.

Reed (21:53):
I'm not being secret like I love Chick-fil-A sauce look,
I'll eat Chick-fil-A too.

Blaine (21:58):
Like you can have whatever stance you want as an
owner of a company, I don't care.
Again, like once again, noteveryone has to accept
everything, like I'm so sick ofthis.
I'm so sick of this, yeah yeah.
I'm so sick of the pandering.
I'm so sick of the performativebullshit and the reality is I
just don't you just want to liveyour life?

(22:19):
Yeah sometimes, yeah, and youknow what?
I want to go to a pride paradeand not have a bunch of straight
people marching in.

Reed (22:23):
You lost me.
You lost me and I want to go toa Pride parade.
You know what Reed I?

Blaine (22:27):
would like to take you to a fun Pride parade, as we've
started reclaiming it.
Will you come to the DallasCedar Springs Pride parade in
September?
No, you should.
We do a fabulous thing with myhairstylist.
He has the salon right on CedarSprings and we do a whole
spread and everything and we goout to the street and then we
watch all the floats.

Reed (22:48):
It's a lot of fun and you have drinks and food and
everything and you have abathroom If I wanted to stare at
hot dudes in, like leatherhalters or whatever.

Blaine (22:58):
They're not even leather halters, more like g-strings.

Reed (23:01):
Let me just be honest.
I have a Twitter account.
Okay, I'm good, I'm good, I'mgood, I'm solid.

Blaine (23:05):
Oh, what's your dirty twitter?
I'm not telling you my dirtytwitter, oh my god, do we have
to search for that?

Reed (23:11):
holy shit I'm probably stupid enough to have it the
same as all my other handles.
But whatever, we're not gonnago there.

Blaine (23:17):
Oh my god that is gonna totally be a clip for sure.
Um, everyone search for reed'sdirty twitter.
Um, I didn't even know itexisted, by the way.
Um, we learned so much abouteach other here, reid, I didn't
know, I know, this is whathappens.

Reed (23:31):
Did you drug my wine?
My wine is.

Blaine (23:33):
I know it's a little wine tonight because we're
actually filming at night,because somebody was a little
late today, but look, at the endof the day, pride was never
theirs is my thing.
It was always about us.
It was always about our peopleand it's ours.
And it started with resistanceand not like freaking rainbow
cupcakes and silly littlet-shirts at Target.

Reed (23:55):
Yes, yes, blaine, I understand what you're saying.
However, for those of youheterosexual individuals out
there that like to support yourgay community, you are more than
welcome to no problem.
We accept you just like youaccept us.

Blaine (24:11):
I have plenty of straight friends that accept us
and that accept me as a gay man,and I'm super thankful for them
.
Don't get me wrong.
Like I love my straight friendsthat are allies, I'm not
talking about those people.
I'm talking about the peoplethat just don't care, that
pander to the gay community,that pander during Pride and
that at the end of the day, likeyou know, I don't know it's a

(24:33):
performative act.
That's really what it is.

Reed (24:35):
And I'm just kind of over it.

Blaine (24:37):
So I'm totally okay with the bullshit sponsorships being
done.
Maybe our Prides will now justbe a little more homespun,
without all the crazy floats.
I remember one year I was at apride parade and Disney did a
float in West Hollywood and itlike shot confetti like every
like five feet, which I thoughtwas very like bad for the

(24:57):
environment.
There was confetti all overSanta Monica Boulevard and I was
just like what has this becomeLike?
It used to just be kind of likefun little bar floats and now
we've turned into like Disney,like full on, like animatronics
with confetti.

Reed (25:13):
And, by the way, I would love to see you can get me at a
at a pride parade when there isa Hallmark channel float at the
parade.
Sign me up for that prideparade, cause I would love to
see a Hallmark channel float.

Blaine (25:29):
Well, I'm sure they have one at the Thanksgiving Day
Parade with Macy's, and that'swhere they should stay oh my
goodness yeah, and you know whatI want.
I want, like Jock Bar andRoundup and, you know, yeehaw
and all that kind of gym bar,whatever you want to call them
exactly.
So, by the way, welcome tohaving our pride back, enjoy it,
all that kind of gym bar,whatever you want to call them
Exactly.
So, by the way, welcome tohaving our pride back, enjoy it.

(25:52):
It's what it used to be andlet's get rid of the streets out
of our freaking business.

Reed (25:57):
We're not going to get rid of the streets.

Blaine (25:59):
No, I'm just saying out of our business.
That's all I'm saying.

Reed (26:02):
Sure, sure, sure, yeah no.

Blaine (26:05):
I just I don't.
You don't have to come to ourparade, you don't have to, like
you know, critique us becauseguys are in jockstraps.
It's just, it's a ridiculousthing to me.

Reed (26:15):
That's all I'm saying.
How about?
We don't even need a parade.
We're good.
We're good guys, we cancelebrate.
We listen us.
As gays, we celebrate a lot, alot.
Don't you think that wecelebrate on a daily, nightly
basis?

Blaine (26:29):
I just think you're missing the point and that was
the point of our Because of themseries, and we'll just get to
the next part of this showBecause we are clearly going to
agree to disagree.

Reed (26:41):
Yes.

Blaine (26:44):
Are we going to talk about Pulse?
Yes, we are going to talk aboutPulse, for sure.
So we've basically beenspending Pride talking about
kind of unsung heroes this year,because I think what really has
hit me looking at kind of thisGen Z generation of kids that
are gay, is they just reallydon't understand the people that
came before us, and it reallyreally drives me crazy.

(27:07):
It's almost like they don'tunderstand our history and like
what gay people have reallygotten gone through in order to
get the rights that we have.
And, by the way, it's not justgay people, like so many
different minority groups havefought a good fight to get
rights, and I think a lot of ithas been, yes, protesting or yes
, marching, and gay pride kindof came from that too, you know,

(27:30):
post Stonewall riots.
But a lot of it, too, is justabout being a decent, honorable
human and getting people to justaccept you after a period of
time.
Right, I really wanted to kindof explore a lot of these kind
of people that kind of were fromour history and talk about it.

(27:50):
I personally love history.
I mean, part of the reason Istarted this podcast thing is
because I love researchingthings and talking about it
Because you were alive back then.
So it makes sense and you know,I just I really thought it was
important to kind of like digback and talk about some of
these people from the past.

(28:10):
I mean, a lot of people don'tremember, even like Matthew
Shepard who died in 1998.
I mean, when we talk aboutviolence against the gay
community, I mean even Iabsolutely remember Matthew
Shepard.

Reed (28:24):
I remember Ellen DeGeneres getting on.
She flew out to um, god, uh,what is it called?
I remember Ellen DeGeneresflying out to Laramie, getting
on stage crying and saying thisisn't why I came out.
I didn't want this is I didn'twant this to happen go ahead
please finish her oh no, I mean,I just to me.

Blaine (28:48):
It just seems like I think that I hear a lot of
people talk today about beingsuper afraid to live in this
country and just with thingsgoing on in legislation let's
not even legislation, let's sayexecutive orders or whatever.
And you know there's 20something year old kids and
obviously I remember MatthewShepard as well.

(29:10):
I mean he was tied to a fence.
He was, you know, 20 years old,tied to a fence, beaten I
should say, and left dead.
He didn't die until like fivedays later.
But he was in the cold for 18hours and he did die five days
later and it was just absolutelya tragic moment kind of in our
history.

Reed (29:28):
He was also HIV positive.

Blaine (29:30):
Was he?
I actually didn't know.

Reed (29:33):
Yes, if you watch the movie that they made about it,
the police officer actually thatrenders aid to him at the time
she's not wearing gloves andit's a big concern.
That's a part of the movie orscene in the movie.
It's a big concern that youknow she gets his blood on her
and doesn't know what to do atthat point.

(29:54):
Oh really.

Blaine (29:56):
See, I'm not surprised at all about that.
I mean, there's so much fearback then and it's such a
different world today than whatit used to have.
I mean, I said this I actuallywas just in, obviously, spain
and I met somebody from thequote unquote, new Middle East
and you know he's moving toEurope.
Because he said you can loseyour job, you can lose your life

(30:19):
, even be taken away in a car.
You know if people really didfind out.
And as he's gotten older in hislike late thirties, super
attractive guy, he's gottenolder in his like late thirties,
super attractive guy, he'swealthy, really accomplished.
People are asking like why areyou in your late thirties not
married?
And it's like this reallybizarre thing.
It really hearkens back to thedays of what these people went

(30:43):
through and we just don't livein that world anymore.
And I think, like the peoplethat went through a lot of these
trials and tribulations, Ithink are worth talking about
and it's almost like we'veforgotten about them, in my
opinion, and that's what I guessirritates me more than anything
.

Reed (31:00):
First of all, very handsome Spain guy that Blaine
met.

Blaine (31:06):
A Middle Eastern.
I won't say what country, butone of them.

Reed (31:09):
Or all.
There's a large number of thepopulation, the gay population,
that is in their late 30s andnot married Some.

Blaine (31:19):
My point is if you live in certain countries, yes, I
know, and you have thatclassification.
you have a mark on your back.
That is not the case here inthe United States today, but not
that long ago, in 1998, whichyou know is like 20, but 27
years ago, obviously, matthewShepard was killed and tied to a

(31:40):
fence and beaten to death.
So we've made a lot of progressin just 28 years that you can
feel as safe as you can Like.
If something like that happenedtoday I mean we would it would
be like completely shocking.

Reed (31:54):
For sure, for sure.
I mean I coined the phrasefirst world problems.
I mean we don't have manyproblems here in the US.

Blaine (32:01):
I agree, I think people have just become so I don't know
.
I think they become so attunedto just focusing on little
things.
They forget the big picture,they forget how far we've come.
They forget like, again,they've forgotten who came
before us and how much hard workwent into it.

(32:23):
I mean, I've been a part ofthis gay rights movement for 20
years and you know, yeah,there's still work to do, but
like I think we're in a prettygood place.
I mean, I was in Portugal lastyear.
You know, guys, they're likestill like talk about headless
torsos, like you get on Grindr,like you won't even see a face
pic period.

Reed (32:43):
I don't know, what that means.
Shut up, I've never had agrinder.

Blaine (32:49):
Okay, well, basically nobody's showing their face
right, and I will say I went ona date with a guy Like this,
yeah, basically yeah, and withhis head cut off, yeah.
And I went on a date with a guyI mean he was so nervous, he

(33:11):
was sweating, it was.
He was just like we went tolike the most secluded place.
It's just not very comfortablein other parts of the world, and
that's Portugal.
So I think we just forget howgood we have it and look, I know
there's other states where it'snot as comfortable.
Obviously, we live in Texas.
I've been to the deep South,but I've seen huge.
My grandfather, though, livesin East Texas.
I mean, the acceptance I feelthere, compared to what it was
like I don't know 10 years ago,is night and day different.

Reed (33:34):
Right.
I mean I came out when I was 22.
I'm 39 at the moment, so it'scome a long way.
It has come a very long wayjust in that short period of
time time.
And coming from somebody whowas born and raised in South
Florida, for example, Dallasalone houses more gay bars and
gay institutions than where Igrew up in South Florida, like

(33:57):
Fort Lauderdale, Miami area.
You know what I mean.
It's kind of shocking.

Blaine (34:01):
Yeah, it's true.
Yeah, there's just there was ahuge cost for the gay community
being visible, in my opinion,and that's kind of like this
section for me is like thepeople that we've covered really
in our Because of them series.
To recap it's basically HarveyMilk and Gilbert Baker who did

(34:23):
the Pride Flag.
Your favorite thing?
We can talk a little bit aboutthat.

Reed (34:26):
No, it's okay.

Blaine (34:27):
And then also Matthewthew shepherd.
But then, like also, we hadthings like the pulse nightclub.

Reed (34:32):
You and I both have um pulse nightclub was actually my
first ever gay bar.
That was my first ever gay barwhen I was 21, about to turn 22,
and, um, I shortly came outafter I went to Pulse for the
first time, but it really was asafe space.

(34:57):
I know that sounds reallycliche to say, but for me, when
I was in my early 20s andterrified of coming out of the
closet, it was a safe space.
It was a safe space.
It was a safe space.
Everybody was everybody everybartender, every manager, the
door guy, the drag queens andgosh I think it was Sassy, which

(35:17):
I'm not familiar with all ofthe drag queens, but Sassy and
there was another one that we'reoutside smoking a cigarette and
when I I ended up getting a jobthere as a door guy.

Blaine (35:29):
Oh my God, do you wear a door guy at polls?

Reed (35:32):
Yes, I like to say bouncer , but we all don't really look
like a bouncer yeah.
I know I was a door guy.
I checked IDs and then I sweptup cigarette butts at the end of
the night.
But when I was sweeping upcigarette butts they were

(35:55):
outside smoking a cigarette andthey were just the friendliest,
kindest people to me.
And when pulse, when the poleshooting happened, myself and a
group of my friends that hadused to frequent pulse hadn't
been to pulse in quite some timelike we.
The only time that we wouldhave gone to pulse at that point
in time probably would havebeen for a special occasion or a
birthday.
But we still knew bartendersand we were so close to, you
know, the managers andbartenders that were in Pulse
when the shooting happened.
And it was.

(36:15):
It was terrifying.
Now.
Now, just to say how terrifyingit was and how sad it was.
Waking up the morning afterPulse or the few days after
Pulse nightclub shooting, seeingChick-fil-A open, for example,
on a Sunday, which I know is,you know, may not be a big deal
to you guys, but to seeChick-fil-A open on a Sunday

(36:40):
just to help out this, you know,group of victims that are gay,
the gay community, for example,victims that are gay, the gay
community, for example then fastforward two, three, four a week
later, every single storefronthad a rainbow flag, had a
rainbow support.
Like, if you go to Orlando andthe area that I lived in, which
is the area kind of near polls,you can't not see a rainbow or

(37:04):
some sort of LGBTQ support inone of the windows.
It's all over and it.
To go on Facebook after thatand see the amount of love
outpouring from France to youknow, all across the country it
was it really makes you think toyourself like oh, wow, you know
, like we really have come along way.
It's sad that it took 49 peopleto pass away, for example, but

(37:27):
yeah, we have come a very longway.
I'm sorry.
Please tell your story.

Blaine (37:33):
I mean that was a great thing.
I was just going to explain.
Like we have 49 people died.
I mean it happened on a Latinnight at Pulse.
The gunman, omar Mateen,pledged allegiance to ISIS
during the attack, but it wasn'tlike really clarified that it
was a direct connection.
I don't think we ever got ananswer as to what his real

(37:53):
motive was.

Reed (37:54):
I think the wife had questioned his sexuality.
I think, that's what it mighthave been, too as well.
I mean, there's all speculationout there.

Blaine (38:03):
But it was also really sad because the bar was very
tight and then there was so muchconfusion that people were like
trampling each other.
It was just awful.

Reed (38:11):
So the way the bar is set up which I think this is on
multiple documentaries thesedays or on YouTube the way the
bar is set up, there istechnically only one entrance in
.
If you were to look for anemergency exit out the back,
that is the entrance that hewalked through.
He walked through what's behindthe bar, the patio.
That's the only other emergencyentrance that you could have

(38:35):
exited out of.
And I think that the way hecame in he sprayed bullets and
kind of like herded everyoneinto a corner.

Blaine (38:44):
Yeah, that's exactly what happened.
Yeah, I had a really dearfriend that had a place in
Orlando at the time so I went toOrlando all the time.
We would go to every time I wasthere I was doing business with
him.
We did business together, andevery time we would go he would
take me straight, him and hiswife take me to Pulse.
They were friends with theowners and we would just get the

(39:06):
best treatment ever.
They would give us like Pulse.
They were friends with theowners and we would just get the
best treatment ever.
They would give us like bottleservice.
They didn't even do bottleservice at Pulse.

Reed (39:13):
No, if any of you've ever been to Pulse, it was not a
bottle service kind of place.

Blaine (39:18):
We would roll up and they would like be like oh, we
have to do bottle service forthem, which was a little
embarrassing, but you know.

Reed (39:29):
Did you go there when they had a two-way mirror in the
bathroom, like you're at theurinal peeing and you could see?

Blaine (39:34):
oh yeah, yep, yep, yep, yeah, yeah, um, it was always
fun.
Everybody was always so much.
Yeah, I have to say too, theorlando gay scene, especially
back then, was like super funtoo.
I mean like parliament housewas great, I mean I really had a
great time.
But I do remember it was justso devastating.
Actually, my business partnerback then he was on the board of
the One Pulse Foundation aswell, which has given him a ton

(39:56):
of money and it's amazing toyour point, which is how much
the community really came aroundeverybody after that event
happened, because it was reallydevastating as and just to say
as much as I dislike the rainbowflag to drive from my, from my
house, just like two miles upthe street and pass, every

(40:20):
single business had a rainbowflag or a rainbow heart in their
window showing support like youcouldn't.

Reed (40:27):
I think still to this if you drive through that area in
Orlando, it's nothing but likerainbow everything.

Blaine (40:32):
That is true.
And do you even know what therainbow flag stands for, Reed?
You have this like deep hatredof this rainbow flag and I just
want to like talk about it.
I know I did a video on it.

Reed (40:44):
I feel like it's just too much.
It's too much.
Come up with a cool rainbowlogo.

Blaine (40:52):
No, the original is great.
Well, the original actually hadmore colors than what it does
today, because Are you kiddingme?

Reed (41:00):
I thought we added like four colors.

Blaine (41:02):
Oh no, no, that's called the progress flag, which we'll
go ahead and put a thing inthere.
That is not what I'm talkingabout.
I'm talking about.
I'm talking about, um, the sixcolor flag that we have today.
That's just really the rainbowflag, like, kind of like red,
orange, yellow, green, blue,purple red, orange, yellow, yes,
violet actually.
But yes, we talked about gilbertbaker, who's the one, harvey

(41:22):
milk, who was the gay politicianwho was like murdered um by a
conservative um, but but HarveyMilk was the one who had Gilbert
Baker design the flag and wedid it because of them, for that
as well, and it was like reallyfascinating.
But originally it had hot pinkand turquoise as well.
The only reason they got rid ofthose two colors was because
there was fabric shortages.

(41:43):
It wasn't like some kind ofweird political thing, so.
But I will say hot pink stoodfor sex and turquoise stood for
magic and art.
So I'm kind of like, I'm kindof okay with those two going,
because I don't think that was avalue of the community.
So, the way it stands today,I'm just going to tell you what
the colors mean.
I'm going to put the flag up inthe video too.

Reed (42:02):
Pins and needles over here .

Blaine (42:03):
Okay, so red is for life , orange is for life, orange is
for healing, yellow is forsunlight, green is for nature,
blue is for serenity and violetis for spirit.
Remember when we had spirit day?
Did you ever do spirit day?

Reed (42:20):
Or were you not gay then?
First of all, I've been gaysince the day I was born.

Blaine (42:23):
Yeah, but you know what I mean Like out.
We had like spirit day at somepoint.
I forgot what that was.
I think it was like a TrevorProject thing or It'll Get
Better thing.

Reed (42:31):
I actually like Spirit Day .
So what year was Trevor Project?

Blaine (42:35):
I mean it's Better Project.
I think did Spirit Day, but Ithink that was when I was in
college because I wore purple,but that's.
Violet is Spirit, but we'releft with those colors and
here's my take on the pride flagis my point.

Reed (42:49):
Back up.
Sorry, what's the updated prideflag?
That's it.

Blaine (42:53):
Red, orange.
So red is for life, orange isfor healing, yellow is for
sunlight, green is for nature,blue is for serenity and violet
is for spirit.
Keep going, because apparentlyoh, and then what has happened
since this?
This was like what we settledon right After they kind of ran
out of the colors.

Reed (43:11):
And just to be clear, I have not disliked the rainbow
flag prior to its update.
Both, okay.
Okay, just to be clear.

Blaine (43:22):
So what ended up happening is really really,
during 2000 and during theGeorge Floyd thing, everybody
thought that the flag wasn'tinclusive, so then we added
black and brown to.

Reed (43:33):
That to stop you.
You said during 2000.

Blaine (43:36):
I'm sorry, 2020.
I guess it was 2021.
Sorry, dating myself Black andbrown.
To include biopic individualsin our community.
So that got added, and thenthat wasn't enough.
So then we added a transstripes to it, so for the our
community.
So that got added, and then thatwasn't enough.
So then we added a transstripes to it, so for the trans
communities, who are basicallyputting their flag into it, and
then, on top of that, then theintersex people weren't done, so

(43:58):
then they put a circle on themiddle of it for the intersex
and now, if you really want toget crazy, there's two feathers
for two spirit.
So you know, the reality of thesituation is this thing can
just get completely out ofcontrol by and we have, like I
don't know, like each community,like asexuals, bears, leather
people, like they all have aflag, which is fine, they all

(44:18):
have a flag, but like it doesn'tall have to be on one flag.
The reality of the situation isthe original pride flag is
perfect as it is because it's arainbow, it's a spectrum, it's a
prism and it's inclusive ofeverybody.
It never had to do with color,gender, any of these things.
It just was inclusive of ourcommunity.

Reed (44:35):
It was all walks of the rainbow.

Blaine (44:38):
you know all colors of the rainbow, whatever, and I
personally believe that really,and I will say, like, either
straight people or peoplepandering to straight people
even created this whole thingwith the progress flag and all
these different flags and addingthings to them, because it was
a bunch of people wanting,feeling like they weren't
included, wanting to be included, and then people like creating

(44:59):
something to sell to them, andit just drives me crazy.

Reed (45:04):
So you're, so you're anti-progression is what you're
saying.

Blaine (45:06):
Oh, I'm so anti.
Anything but the six colorpride flag like it won't happen,
except for this one.
This is my america americanflag pride pin, so I'll do that
so?

Reed (45:19):
so you're saying that the american flag needed to needed
to be pride themed?

Blaine (45:24):
no, it doesn't.
It doesn't.
I just I just happened to dothis Um and again like.
There's this whole conversationthis year of like should, um,
our federal buildings have, uh,pride flags?
People feel literally attackedbecause the pride flag isn't
flying over federal buildings.
Look, here's the deal.
You and I are both Americans,we live in the United States and

(45:46):
we're US citizens.
Guess what?
We are represented by theAmerican flag.
At the end of the day, I don'tthink our federal buildings have
to fly a pride flag in order tobe accepted as an American.
It should be completelyseparate.
And, by the way, I can't evenkeep up with what our pride flag
has become because it's sodisgusting where we've gone with
it, adding all these differentelements.

(46:08):
The federal government can'tkeep up with it if I can't and
the rest of us can't.

Reed (46:13):
They can't keep up with the alphabet that we've stolen
Exactly.
You know, like we already haveso many letters of the alphabet,
do we really need to take everycolor and shade?

Blaine (46:24):
No, we don't.
We can just be happy with thefact that it's a prism and it's
inclusive of everybody that'swhy I'm saying you should just
change the rainbow like changeit.

Reed (46:32):
It's a tacky ass flag anyway, and I mean that prior to
its update I think you shouldwatch her, because I mean sorry
pre-its update what?

Blaine (46:40):
I think you oh pre-its update, so you don't like the
new update is what you're sayingno, I don't either.

Reed (46:45):
Yeah, no, no, I didn't like it before it got updated
and I especially don't like itnow.
I think I specified that,coming from a person that does
not like the rainbow, like, doesnot a fan of the rainbow flag
and anything else, to see somuch support for the LGBTQ

(47:08):
community driving down thestreet, it did it.
It kind of it's gut-wrenching,it makes you feel emotional.
It's happy, you know, to see somany people that you never
thought I mean, these are peopleagain, because it stands for
something I, and I appreciatethat I just don't like the
rainbow.
I just don't like the rainbow.
I just don't like the rainbowflag.

(47:29):
This is me.
I think it's tacky as fuck.

Blaine (47:31):
Wow.
Well, the reality is it standsfor a lot of people that came
before you.

Reed (47:37):
And I support them.
Just don't expect me to wearone.

Blaine (47:41):
You don't have to.
I mean you don't have to, but Ialso think you're probably
feeling a lot of this because ithas just been, in my opinion,
bastardized over the last likeespecially 10 to 15 years.

Reed (47:54):
It's just tacky in my opinion, but okay.

Blaine (47:57):
I mean I don't know.
I really like took a deep diveinto kind of a lot of historical
figures that you know I wasinspired by in our community,
that I didn't even really knowabout, um, necessarily Um.
So, like, one of my favoriteswas Baird Rustin, um he's a bear

(48:18):
what.
Baird Rustin.

Reed (48:20):
I'm listening.

Blaine (48:21):
Okay, so the?
This is the crazy thing abouthim.
He was a black, openly gay manand he was the chief organizer
for the 1963 March on Washingtonfor Martin Luther King.

Reed (48:33):
Very cool.
He died August 24th 1987.

Blaine (48:36):
Yes, the crazy thing about this story for me and what
inspired me about his story andhe spoke at that rally too but
people didn't even televise itbecause he was gay and you know
he never stopped fighting, nomatter what.
And he, you know he planned thesecurity for Dr King and his

(48:58):
speeches.
I mean he was his right handbut you know he never really
graduated above a deputy, likehe was kind of always like at
the side because in thatcommunity and at that time he
wasn't really allowed to besuper high level because of his
sexuality.
I mean that just like blows mymind today.

(49:20):
Right, like you can be like thearchitect of, like the greatest
civil rights movement in theworld and yet still be basically
a second-class citizen I meanthis all goes back to the first
episode we recorded showing carygrant.

Reed (49:36):
Yeah, he couldn't be openly gay yeah, exactly, I mean
catherine hepburn.

Blaine (49:42):
None of these people could be openly gay, so it
doesn't surprise me I mean hedid live, did live openly gay,
and I mean this is obviously inthe sixties and he was fighting
for, you know, rights forAfrican Americans, um, but then
again he was like a brand, likesomehow also a second class
citizen because he was, you know, a homosexual as well.
It's just such a powerful storyto me, it's just like amazing,

(50:05):
and that's why I'm like we haveso many people that, to me, the
pride flag represents them,because they were the ones who
really showed up and fought forthe right to be us today.

Reed (50:21):
Now remember, we are saying this like I will just
throw out the elephant in theroom.
We are two white males, so forus to say, hey, what are you
complaining about?
You know, we have it so easy.

Blaine (50:37):
We have it so easy to other people, ethnic backgrounds
look, I mean, I actuallyprofiled quite a few um black,
gay, um historical figures.
I mean marcia p johnson for one.
Obviously she's like, the mostfamous of all.
Um most likely was killed uh,for her advocacy at the end of

(51:02):
the day, um, but she wasdefinitely the, you know,
probably the one that everybodythinks about when they think
about, like the gay civil rightsmovement.
I would say Um, but she was uh,she was uh um, she was uh trans
and she actually one of thethings I loved is she really
founded an organization to helptrans youth and uh transition.

(51:25):
Things I loved is she reallyfounded an organization to help
trans youth and transition.
She was one of the people atthe Stonewall riots that
actually like fought, and youknow that's where these pride
parades started from, by the way, reed is Stonewall it was a
raided bar in New York andChelsea.
Have you ever been?

Reed (51:39):
No no.

Blaine (51:41):
It's still there.
It's so cool.

Reed (51:43):
I mean, I believe it.
It's cool.
I thought that I actuallythought it was in London, but
it's in New York.
Yes, I fully accept myignorance when it comes to this,
but it's okay.

Blaine (51:55):
I think those are the people that you kind of have to
honor.
I agree, you know there wasanother woman that I profiled is
Nicole Ramirez, who was a dragqueen as well, Also worked with
Marsha, and you know I'm sorryshe didn't work with Marsha.
Nicole Ramirez is another one,and she's a Chicago drag queen.

(52:19):
A lot of these drag queens haveliterally changed the shape of
our history today.

Reed (52:25):
Right, it's ironic that you say that because a movie
that I remember growing up on myparents rented it from
blockbuster and we watched itover and over and over I know
right um, it was called too longfoo.
Thanks for everything, julienewmar, now the have you seen it
?
No are you serious?

(52:46):
We're talking.
Patrick swayze, john leguizamoand wesley snipes are the three
main characters, and they're alldrag queens that are that are
making their way from new yorkto la for some big drag
competition.
So is this like?

Blaine (53:05):
Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, but US-based.

Reed (53:09):
I don't know.

Blaine (53:10):
You don't know that movie.

Reed (53:11):
Yeah, no, but I will say Stockard Channing was in it,
like really, like Blythe Danner,really big-name actors were in
this movie and honestly, as akid I was like, oh my God, john
Leguizizamo, so he's actually agirl mom, like I was so stupid.
But if you watch this movie asa drag queen he looks legit.

(53:34):
But um, I remember watchingthose growing up and my family
was so funny that they were likesubtly telling me that they
were accepting and I wasoblivious to it, you know yeah,
it's, um.

Blaine (53:51):
I mean, the fight is just like amazing to me, um, and
but none of those people aredrag queens, you know?

Reed (53:58):
that's another, oh, that's another rant for another day
they're not, but that's but forthem to play these.
So I did learn that patrickswayze, his mom, was a showgirl,
either a showgirl or something,and he spent a lot of time, uh,
with her in the dressing roomslike with all these women
getting ready and whatnot, and Iguess he had a lot.

(54:21):
He ended up meeting a lot ofgay people or a lot of drag
queens at some point in time andthat's why he showed his
support.
Wesley Snipes 1995, likedressing up in drag, to be in a
movie.

Blaine (54:34):
I guess that is kind of like pretty revolutionary.

Reed (54:36):
John Leguizamo like.

Blaine (54:39):
Well, I have to tell you one of the, I think, coolest
things that I learned duringthis series speaking of biopic
gay individuals was was WilliamDorsey Swan.
You know the sisters of theperpetual indulgence in our
community.
They're the.
They're the guys that dress uplike the nuns.

(55:00):
It's a little irreverent, butit's a thing.

Reed (55:03):
No.

Blaine (55:04):
Oh, they do a lot for the community and they're always
raising money and stuff.
Anyway, one of them popped upin my comments and was like you
really have to profile WilliamDorsey Swan.
I was like who's William DorseySwan Do you know?
I can guarantee you not oneperson probably watching any of
this knows.

Reed (55:24):
That's not necessarily true.
We have some very intelligentlisteners true.

Blaine (55:27):
Well, he was born into slavery in maryland in 1858 and
then he was emancipated and hewas the first drag queen ever
and he looked, looks fabulous inthese photos and they're like
the real, like 1890s, likephotos black and white, like
everything?
yeah, that's why that questionthat you asked earlier it was I

(55:47):
was like no way yeah no, and hewas an emancipated slave, moved
to washington dc and he wouldhave these like fabulous drag
balls with like candlelightmusic, and then he would have
other emancipated slaves thereas well and he got arrested like
a ton uh for it, because youweren't allowed to be lewd and
dressed as a woman back then.

(56:10):
Um, but man, he made a reallygood woman, I gotta say, like he
was tall and gorgeous and uh atleast in the pictures, when I
can tell and uh really just hadthese fancy parties.
But he did ask for a pardonfrom Theodore Roosevelt, I think
.
Is that right?
I'm almost positive that'scorrect.

(56:30):
But oh, no, sorry, that's notright.
Grover Cleveland, that's whatit is.
Grover Cleveland, who wasprobably our worst US president
ever.
He didn't give him one, by theway.

Reed (56:43):
I'm listening.

Blaine (56:44):
But anyway, he was the first drag queen speaking of,
and I mean that was in the 1890s, that's when it all kind of
started.
I guess I wonder how he came upwith that idea.
Like that's the first RuPaul.
Do you watch RuPaul's Drag Race?

Reed (57:01):
No, I don't.

Blaine (57:03):
I don't have you ever.

Reed (57:06):
Yeah, I've watched it, but I think it's funny.
In my opinion it's comedy.

Blaine (57:11):
I do like RuPaul, I don't really watch it anymore.
I used to a lot more, but Idon't really do that much more.

Reed (57:17):
I mean, rupaul has made a dynasty for herself himself
herself.

Blaine (57:24):
I think it's.
It's himself.
I guess herself.
My name is Rue.

Reed (57:28):
Rue.

Blaine (57:28):
Yeah, I guess he's always Rue, nevermind Um.
But yeah, I don't know.

Reed (57:34):
RuPaul is in too long food , by the way.

Blaine (57:37):
Oh, so there you go.
Then it's all fine If RuPaul'sin it.
It's If RuPaul's in it.

Reed (57:42):
Circa 1995.
You have to watch it.
I'm telling you, it's a greatmovie.

Blaine (57:48):
Well, I will definitely watch it, and you need to watch
Priscilla Queen of the Desert.
I'll consider it.
It's about these drag queensthat go across Australia on a
bus.

Reed (57:59):
Oh, no, yeah, I've heard about that, yeah, yeah.

Blaine (58:02):
It's actually really good.

Reed (58:04):
Yeah, what year was it?

Blaine (58:05):
They're going to Perth.

Reed (58:06):
I think it's in the 90s, so like around the same time.
By the way, this is like anecessary part of gay culture.

Blaine (58:13):
Read what Watching Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

Reed (58:17):
Listen man.
I was watching Tu Wong Fu atage 10.

Blaine (58:26):
Okay, like come on.
Okay, excuse me while I go getyour gay card, because you
definitely earned it.

Reed (58:31):
Thank you.
Thank you, I watched FirstWives Club.
I mean, there were no.

Blaine (58:35):
Okay, first Wives Club, by the way, is the most
underrated best movie of alltime, in my opinion.
Agreed, yeah, you know what myultimate dream is, and I just
have to divert from our veryserious discussion.
Sure, my ultimate dream forHalloween is to do First Wives
Club and to be skinny enough todo Goldie Hawn.
That won't ever happen.
I'll probably have to be DianeKeaton, that's okay.

Reed (58:57):
You mean Bette Midler?

Blaine (59:01):
Not Bette Midler.
I don't want to be Bette Midler, I'd be Diane Keaton or Goldie
Hawn, but I just really want tobe Goldie Hawn because I feel
like I'm her.

Reed (59:09):
You're just going to be an actress and have all the
feelings.

Blaine (59:12):
I mean I am, I am an actress and I do have all the
feelings and I have all thefiller too.

Reed (59:16):
Yeah, I mean, that's the reality.

Blaine (59:19):
I love that movie.
Have you gotten filler done?
Yes, I totally do.
I have calcium filler here.
I don't have lip filler, butthen I do Botox.
But yeah, I have calcium fillerin my cheeks.
It pulls them back like thisJust to kind of get rid of these
, like soften these lines here.
Well, reed, you're not quite myage yet, but once you are

(59:41):
you'll understand.
Dude, I'll be 40 in a month.
No, not 40 in a month.
What are?

Reed (59:48):
you going to do for your birthday?
Nothing.
It's August 1st Nothing.

Blaine (59:53):
I mean, that doesn't mean you shouldn't do nothing.
Oh my God, that's right aroundwhen Gay Pride is in Dallas.

Reed (01:00:02):
Just kidding God.
No, I will not get on a float.
I will not.
I'm not celebrating my 40thbirthday.

Blaine (01:00:08):
You won't get on a float in a jockstrap no.

Reed (01:00:13):
I don't know why I questioned that for so much wine
but it is.

Blaine (01:00:17):
It is on his dirty twitter, so you can find it
there no, no, no.

Reed (01:00:20):
My dirty twitter is just a bunch of nevermind.

Blaine (01:00:23):
It's nothing oh see, dirty Twitter is just a bunch of
Never mind it's nothing.
Oh, see the real tease comingout about Reed and his dirty
Twitter and his more than 20people that he's hooked up with.
See, it always comes out.

Reed (01:00:34):
I've definitely hooked up with more than 20 people.
I've not had sex with more than20 people.
I'd venture to say much less.

Blaine (01:00:42):
I'm like contemplating exactly what you're saying on
this one, but uh, okay, I don'tbelieve you, but okay like
hooked up, with hooked up andhave sex I mean, how can I go to
spain and almost like, do morethan you?

Reed (01:00:56):
and it's not no yes, blaine, yes, it's okay.
It is okay that you went tospain for a week and you've had
sex with more people.

Blaine (01:01:05):
I didn't say that.

Reed (01:01:07):
Adam alone.
Adam alone went on a cruise,for fuck's sake, and one night.
I know that's just gross, don'tsay it 30 dudes in one night,
no offense, adam, love you, loveyou Adam it's the same.

Blaine (01:01:21):
That's a little much for me.

Reed (01:01:24):
I couldn't do that because we all know Adam was just.
That's a little much for me.

Blaine (01:01:28):
I couldn't do that Because we all know Adam was
just.
Well, that's not the pride thatI was saying that we fought for
.
But okay, you know, but to eachtheir own, really to each their
own, I mean it's.

Reed (01:01:36):
For sure, for sure.

Blaine (01:01:37):
Yeah.

Reed (01:01:39):
It's just not your thing, or really mine.
Now that that night with Ab,that's that's fucking
relationship.
Anarchy, for like that'sanarchy.
That's just straight up anarchy.

Blaine (01:01:46):
What?
Having sex with 30 people onone night.

Reed (01:01:48):
And one yeah.

Blaine (01:01:49):
Oh yeah, that is total relationship anarchy for sure.

Reed (01:01:53):
That's not relationship, that's just.
That's straight anarchy, yeah.

Blaine (01:01:57):
Yeah, I would agree with that.

Reed (01:01:59):
Yeah, I love you, adam, I love you, I do.
Yeah, I love you.

Blaine (01:02:02):
I do.
Yeah, well, you just left.
Throwing him under the bus iswhat I think.

Reed (01:02:06):
No, I'm sorry, I did not mean to throw Adam under the bus
.
Fuck 30 people in one night.
He said it himself, he admittedit.

Blaine (01:02:14):
Well, I do think we get a lot of flack for this stuff,
because as we talk about, likeour rights and like I don't know
what we fought for, it's likedid we really fight for that?

Reed (01:02:28):
I'm like yeah, I mean, that's one of the things we've
fought for.
If you want to have sex with 30people in a night, yeah, you
should go right ahead.
To each their own.
To each their own, Absolutely.
I very much agree with you onthat.
I just to further explain myreasoning behind feeling the way
I do about people that talkshit about monogamous people.
I have personally experienced ajudgment for not wanting to
open up a relationship that Ihad, and again, was it from

(01:02:50):
close friend of mine who alwaysso his long-term relationship.
My barber's long-termrelationship had ended very
dramatically, like we all had tokind of help him move out of

(01:03:13):
the place and it was all becausehis boyfriend at the time had
cheated on him.
Well, he started datingsomebody else, fast forward and
come to find out one night wewere shooting pools somewhere, I
think, and out of nowhere hewas talking to his boyfriend and
said, oh yeah, if you want tobring that guy home, you can.

(01:03:33):
And I personally was kind oflike offended.
I was like I don't want to sayhis name, but let's call him
John.

Blaine (01:03:43):
I was like John.
That's not a really funnickname, by the way.
You can come up with betterones.
I have good nicknames.

Reed (01:03:48):
His name is very Asian.

Blaine (01:03:52):
Why can't you just come up with like a, like a quality
or something funny?

Reed (01:03:56):
Snoopy, we'll say Snoopy God, you're bad at this, I know.
I really am.
Uh, so I was like Uh, so I waslike dude, I thought that we
were on the same page when itcame to monogamy.
Like did you and Kyle open upyour relationship?
And he looked at me and he'slike Reed, you're just so closed
minded.
It's stupid, it's ridiculoushow closed minded you are.

(01:04:16):
And he started judging mebecause I've I've always been
monogamous.
So I mean, that was that's whatI'm saying about judgmental
people against us monogamouspeople.
Like again, I don't care ifyou're opening up your
relationship.
That particular circumstance orsituation was with a close

(01:04:37):
friend of mine who had alwaysled me to believe that he
believed in monogamy.
Right, well, the moment that Iasked him, just as his buddy, I
was like so have you and Kylestarted opening up your
relationship?
He immediately turned aroundand was like Reed, you're just
so close minded.
I can't like why wouldn't youopen up your relationship?
It's stupid not to.
I'm like now you're trying tomake me feel stupid for

(01:05:01):
believing in monogamy.
When the ultimately, thequestion was did you start
opening up your relationship?
I just want to know now,because I want to know if I need
to get three gifts forChristmas.
Two gifts Like that was a dickcomment, wow.

Blaine (01:05:17):
Well, I think we need to have a whole episode on
throuples and monogamy.

Reed (01:05:22):
I have close friends that live in Denver that are
throuples.

Blaine (01:05:24):
And I think maybe have someone else that you were
telling me about today that wecan actually interview, which I
think would be really fun.

Reed (01:05:31):
Oh yeah.

Blaine (01:05:32):
That is straight.

Reed (01:05:34):
Yes, she is, she's not though.
Straight bye, bisexual, has twobaby daddies.
Baby, yeah, baby guys,beautiful children.
Baby, yeah, baby guys,beautiful children.
They've made beautiful childrentogether, but, yeah, I would
probably describe them more asswingers.

(01:05:55):
Is that what you'd describethem as?

Blaine (01:05:57):
Yeah, I would call them swingers.

Reed (01:05:58):
Don't want to be wrong about what I'm saying.

Blaine (01:06:01):
You're so nervous about it.

Reed (01:06:03):
No, I mean, listen, I'm not out to offend anybody, like
I've never been one to offendanybody.
I I do accept all walks of life, I accept everyone.
I just don't think it's fairfor me to get judged because I
want to be in a monogamousrelationship.
I think that's kind ofhypocritical, straight up
hypocritical.
To judge me for wanting to bein a monogamous relationship

(01:06:28):
just because you aren't in amonogamous relationship.
Does that make sense?

Blaine (01:06:32):
yeah, it does.
I think the reality of thesituation is is our community is
very diverse and everybody hastheir own little thing, and
that's what this whole fight wasfor for everybody to just live
their own damn lives the waythey wanted to, and that's what
all these people fought for.
That we've been talking aboutthis whole month, right.

Reed (01:06:52):
In my opinion, I think we're getting a little carried
away with, but that's mypersonal opinion.

Blaine (01:06:57):
No, but look, Pride is our community is just about
whatever works for you right, soyou can be right or die.
Monogamous.
Some are open, some are polyand some are still figuring it
out.

Reed (01:07:10):
Okay, you said poly and I got in trouble for saying that.

Blaine (01:07:14):
No, this is the way you said it.
You said it in a veryjudgmental way.
I'm not saying it in ajudgmental way.

Reed (01:07:19):
I said the entire word.
Instead of just saying poly, Isaid polygamy.
You do know that poly is shortfor polygamy, right, like think?

Blaine (01:07:28):
I think it was just taken a different way fuck, I
don't think I'm gonna get introuble for it, by the way.
But look, the reality of thesituation is, is, I think, that,
like I said, but look, thiswhole community has evolved so
much and everybody has their ownthing, and that makes them
happy.

Reed (01:07:47):
And guess what?

Blaine (01:07:48):
In the United States, we're allowed to live that way
Whatever makes us happy.
That's what's great.

Reed (01:07:53):
Right?
No, I agree with you, I do.
I see a lot of relationships.
So, like the young lady thatyou were talking about me
bringing on, she has her and herpartner, who's a male.
They have a beautiful daughter.
They have a beautiful well, shehas two children.
She has an older daughter thatshe had with a previous man and

(01:08:16):
now they have a younger daughterthat they both had together, if
that makes any sense.
But they're not married andthey're perfectly in love to a
degree and they make it work.
I'm not saying thatrelationships have to be
conventional or I don't know.
Not all relationships have tobe monogamous.
I get it Like you can love morethan one person, it's just not

(01:08:38):
me.

Blaine (01:08:39):
Who you love, Reed.

Reed (01:08:41):
Absolutely, absolutely.

Blaine (01:08:43):
We'll find you a man that you can be monogamous with.

Reed (01:08:45):
I am not desperate, but in the meantime.

Blaine (01:08:48):
I'm just saying that this whole fight has been for us
to do whatever the hell we want.

Reed (01:08:54):
If you're not listen, guys , if you're not out there doing
whatever the hell you fuckingwant now, then you're not living
.
I agree.
Cheers to that.

Blaine (01:09:03):
And, by the way, cheers to all of the people that really
came before us, that gave usthe ability to live and love who
we want.
Yes, thank you.
Thank you this month.
And then we had our friend Matt, who you know was forced out of

(01:09:25):
the closet.
He was a great story andreliving that was really
traumatic because that was likea year ago.
We recorded that one, finallylaunched it and then really just
all these Because of themseries you know Bayard, marsha,
stormy, the lesbian nurses whogave their blood, the blood
sisters.

Reed (01:09:43):
Matthew Shepard.
Matthew Shepard who gave theirblood, the Blood Sisters Matthew
Shepard.
Matthew Shepard Chose to gointo a chose.
To move back to Laramie Wyoming, just to you know, walk into a
gay bar or not a gay bar, I'msorry, a bar A bar, yeah, and
yeah, I mean it's just, it'sjust amazing.

Blaine (01:10:00):
There's just so many people that you can name and I
just hope that people reallytake stock and, I don't know,
think about the community andall these people who fought for
our rights, because I thinkwe're in a pretty good place
today where you can havediscussions about whatever
stupid.
What was it again?
What did they call it?
What, what was thisrelationship type thing?

Reed (01:10:21):
All right.
So it's an article that Blaine,I'm sure, will post a link for,
but it's called RelationshipAnarchy.
Do you want to?

Blaine (01:10:31):
No, we're going to do a whole thing on relationship
types later.
It's too much to get into.
It's very deep Relationship.

Reed (01:10:38):
Anarchy is all.

Blaine (01:10:39):
We're wrapping up this.

Reed (01:10:41):
You can go to our story.

Blaine (01:10:42):
You know what you can do .
You can do a read between thelines reads new series for
Coffee with Gays, becauseBlaine's been doing all the
Coffee with Gays series.
So how about you do a wholeread between the lines on
Relationship Anarchy, and Iwould love to watch it.
It would be anarchy, if I wasdoing it.
Yes, you can live any way youwant and, honestly, that's why
I'm thankful to be living in thetime that we're living now,

(01:11:03):
because, god, it was hard to begay back then.

Reed (01:11:06):
Really it was I mean, how would you know?
Oh wait, you were there, youwere right, I was there.

Blaine (01:11:13):
I feel like I've lived it in really researching
everyone's history, but, yeah, Iam glad that we're living in
the day that we are living innow.
So that's just my thought, Iagree.
What are your closing thoughtson pride, as we finally end this
pride month?

Reed (01:11:30):
God it was, it was, it was so great.
So not celebrating pride?
Well, no, I'm very, I listen,I'm.
I'm a non ashamed, openly gayman.

Blaine (01:11:44):
So pride month all for it, and I think that you can be
very prideful about that,because it's all these people
that we talked about this monththat have kind of paved the way
for you to not be ashamed.

Reed (01:11:55):
For sure, for sure, very grateful.

Blaine (01:11:57):
Yeah, otherwise you'd be like, probably sulking in a gay
bar on Melrose, you know,getting arrested in a raid.

Reed (01:12:06):
I would definitely be arrested, but yeah.

Blaine (01:12:07):
Yeah, me too, for sure, Like for sure, yeah, yeah, I
don't know.
I'm very thankful.
Like I said, I feel like wehave our pride back this year.
I feel like it's been returnedto us.
Let's have some pride in ourcommunity and thank everyone
that's really come before us and, by the way, there's a ton of
non-famous people and non-civilrights leaders that have also,

(01:12:29):
like, fought the good fight thatare no longer with us that,
like you know, we have to thankfor this.

Reed (01:12:34):
For sure.
We appreciate all everyone,anyone that's supportive of one
another, Be kind.

Blaine (01:12:41):
I just hope people really realize that what we have
today is actually a pretty goodthing and let's just be a
little bit more thankful for itand live our lives free and open
the way we can, the best way wecan.

Reed (01:12:58):
Put a little love in your heart.

Blaine (01:13:02):
Well, in that case, I'm going to end it there.
I need more wine.
I just want to say happy prideand thanks to everyone for
making Coffee with Gaze.
You know what it is.
Follow for more content likethis.
We have a lot of guests comingup in future shows.
We'll be going live every well,not live, but we'll be dropping

(01:13:22):
new episodes every Thursday,getting better at it.
Our socials are heating upbecause we have been just
posting like crazy.

Reed (01:13:31):
And when he says we, he means he Me, blaine.
Yes, blaine has been postinglike crazy.

Blaine (01:13:37):
I have gotten so good at it.
I'm just like boom.
So follow Coffee with Gaze.
It's debatable.
TikTok's the only differentone's coffee with gays pod.
Uh, because I started acompletely new account, um, for
many reasons, but, um, prettysure we got shadow banned on the
old one, oops, but uh, all theother ones are just at coffee
with gays, so follow us thereand uh, yeah, let's make this

(01:13:59):
thing a success.
We're excited to and we'd alsolike to hear, like, what you
want to hear us talk about aswell for sure, please, please,
reach out and tell us if youhave questions.

Reed (01:14:11):
If you guys want us to get a message out there for you,
please, by all means, we'rehappy to do so.

Blaine (01:14:16):
I mean half of my because of them series was
people's suggestions on peoplethat were from the gay rights
movement that I didn't even knowexisted, and I was like where
are you getting these comments?
On our social media, which youdon't check.

Reed (01:14:30):
Yeah, guys, I'm sorry, I'm really bad at the social media,
but for sure Blaine gets it.

Blaine (01:14:35):
And I will send him the messages especially if you ask
for where his naughty Twitter is.

Reed (01:14:43):
It's yeah, sure yeah.

Blaine (01:14:49):
I will.
I will definitely do it, andReid will also be posting videos
soon, because I can't do it allmyself.

Reed (01:14:54):
Right, yes, yes, yes, what Blaine said.

Blaine (01:14:57):
Well, thank you, Reid, for this episode of Coffee with
Gaze.
Thank you to everyone forlistening and I will say this
pride didn't start with us andit sure as hell doesn't end here
, oh for sure.
Cheers, Cheers, Reed.

Reed (01:15:10):
Bye guys.

Blaine (01:15:12):
Have a good one.

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Because of Them: Pride Then, Pride Now | Pride Arc Finale | Ep 23

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Because of Them: Pride Then, Pride Now | Pride Arc Finale | Ep 23