S2E22: Wakaya Wells (Choctaw Nation)

When Wakaya Wells, a two-spirit poet from the Choctaw Nation, speaks of the sanctuary they found in writing, it's more than just words on a page—it's a testament to the power of self-expression in navigating one's identity. Our latest episode invites listeners into Wakaya's inspiring journey, revealing how education at Dartmouth and the Institute of American Indian Arts became the forge for their transformation into a fiction writer and a voice within their respective communities. Their narrative is a beacon for anyone who's wrestled with inner turmoil, demonstrating how one can channel the chaos of conflicting ideologies and mixed emotions into a wellspring of strength and enlightenment.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
I think about living with a mental illness and that
there's good and bad and there'sgifts that it brings, and maybe
sometimes you would call whatthe experience is like a curse
as well.
But I try to hold that up inthat balance and think about how
things can be both frighteningand dangerous and yet also

(00:28):
protective.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
First Peoples Fund presents the Collective Spirit
Podcast.
The Collective Spirit moveseach of us to stand up and make
a difference, to pass onancestral knowledge and simply
extend a hand of generosity.
The Collective Spirit Podcastfeatures Native artists and
culture bearers who discuss thepower of Indigenous art and

(01:03):
culture.
We discuss the power ofIndigenous art and culture.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Hello everyone, my name is Wakaya Wells.
I'm a citizen of the ChoctawNation of Oklahoma and I
currently live in Minneapolis,minnesota.
But I was born and raised inthe Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma

(01:28):
in the 10 and a half counties,the reservation there right
along the Texas border.
I'm a poet, I'm a writer andthen I'm a storyteller as well.
When I was a kid probablyaround in middle school I grew
up in the Bible Belt and growingup church was a big deal to me,
to my family and my life and myyounger years.

(01:50):
I grew up in a family churchand was surrounded by loved ones
and uplifting and a lot of love.
And then, when some of myfamily members my grandparents,
passed away, we started going tothe Southern Baptist Church,
and I'm two-spirit.
I didn't have those words whenI was that young, but I do now.

(02:11):
Growing up queer in a SouthernBaptist Church was really
challenging, and so there was alot I was processing at the time
and didn't really have anyoneto talk to, and so I started
writing and I think it was toprocess guilt and shame and

(02:36):
things like sin, which I thinkis a Christian word or idea, and
process that, and so I had thismath notebook and used to sit
and write and try and reconcilemy relationship with my God at
the time and that's how itstarted.

(02:59):
I don't remember being inschool or going to class or
anything like that.
It just came out of necessityand a desire to have some
healing and so that was myintroduction as a kid.
And then over time differentthings were introduced to me, or

(03:20):
through school or through.
My sister told me about spokenword poetry once she had went
off to college and learned aboutthat, and so I got into that
and In college it was takingsome classes.
Growing up in the ChoctawNation in the town I was in it
was, I think I've always been aperson that learned just as much

(03:42):
outside of the classroom as Idid in it.
And the town I grew up in wasreally diverse and had a lot of
characters and there was a largefreedman community of Choct
Freedmen.
There was a large circuspopulation, so they called it
Circus City, usa.
So I think growing up there andbeing amongst different folks

(04:04):
and going to public school andnot always having resources, and
so that's really had an effecton me and my outlook and how I
understand the world, for betteror worse.
And then I went to college atDartmouth in New Hampshire.
I feel like it was thisopportunity to really learn and

(04:28):
understand myself better andgrow and figure out who I was.
And then later I found myselfat Institute of American Indian
Arts getting creative writing.
I had never really wrotefiction and I applied for
fiction and poetry and I waslike I've been writing poetry a

(04:48):
long time, maybe I should learnsomething new and maybe my work
deserves to be longer than apage or two.
Maybe the stories I'm tellingare longer and need more space.
And so I was like I'll writefiction, I'll try to write
fiction.
And so that's what I did thereand was surrounded by amazing

(05:10):
native writers, talented,brilliant people and mentors and
students alike.
Just a lot of powerfulconversations happen at that
place and that part of the world, and so that's set me on this
journey that I'm on now and howI found my way to First People's
Fund as well.

(05:35):
My identities and who I am shapemy work a lot and my experience
growing up where I grew up, andso I always say it goes back to
healing.
I think I write to heal.
I think that's why I sit withthings and why I type them into

(05:55):
my phone and why I need to getaway sometimes and put words to
what I'm feeling.
I think it's to heal, so that Ican look back on things and not
say, oh, that was just trauma.
That was trauma that Iexperienced.
I can, I'm okay with sayingthat, but I would also like to

(06:21):
learn from it and grow from itand heal from it and it not
continue to cause harm to me,and so I think that's what
inspires me to do what I do.
And then, obviously, I guess Iwould just say I'm crazy, like I

(06:42):
have bipolar disorder, and Iplay a lot with this idea of
madness and what we deem crazy.
In the Choctaw language, theword for crazy is tasimbo, and
what I've been told about it isthat it can be good and bad.
And so I think that idea ofbeing good and bad really finds
its way into what I write aboutand the experience of living

(07:06):
with mental illness and how theWestern world understands
something like bipolar disorder,what the doctors tell me and
then what I experienced formyself and the struggles and the
suffering that I go through.
And, interestingly enough, whenI was in my program at IAIA, I

(07:27):
was starting to write the novelthat I'm working on now and it's
very autobiographical, which Ithink probably a lot of first
novels for writers are, and Ihad a mentor say I wonder what
this character you're writingabout, this young person who is

(07:48):
deemed crazy by the world.
I wonder what their role wouldhave been 200 years ago.
And that comment has reallyhung with me for a long time
because Native people, we dream,we're dreamers and we're
healers and we carry medicinewith us and there's things that

(08:13):
we did back then that I think westill do today.
And I think about that a lotwhen I think about living with a
mental illness and that there'sgood and bad and there's gifts
that it brings, and maybesometimes you would call what
the experience is like a curseas well.

(08:33):
The experience is like a curseas well, but I try to hold that
up in that balance and thinkabout how things can be both
frightening and dangerous andyet also dangerous protective
For me and my belief system.
For Choctaws.
We have the diamondbackrattlesnake, who we revere, so

(08:56):
it's on all of our clothing.
All the diamonds is where itcomes from, and so we revere
this snake because it used toprotect over our gardens and our
livelihoods and would keep ourcrops safe, and I don't know.
There's a balance to that andan understanding of you're meant
to fear this thing and yet it'salso protecting you and taking

(09:20):
care of an extension of yourself, and we used it for other
medicine as well.
But I think the spiritualunderstanding of that for me has
been the good and the bad andthe balance of the two, and so
that's something that alsoinspires my work the collective

(09:58):
spirit podcast is produced byfirst people's fund, whose
mission is to honor and supportindigenous artists and culture
bearers through grant making,initiatives, mentorship.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
Learn more at firstpeoplesfundorg.