June 30, 2025 • 16 mins
We're having an identity crisis on the palette cleanser... Art has found that she can pass as several different people, and has been offered some pretty cash to do just that.
Time to lay off Katy Perry people! She's also a labubu hater, and we embrace that in this space. If we uncancel one celeb, we have to cancel three in their place, so that's EXACTLY what we're doing.
Plus a show and tell piece, made from revenge, smarties, and Art's grandma's used pantyhose.Want get on the soapbox and spruik something? https://www.speakpipe.com/concealedwithartsimone
Join me on the socials:
Instagram: instagram.com/concealedwithartsimone/
Tik Tok: tiktok.com/@concealedwithartsimone
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
We're back for another Palette Cleanser episode.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
I'm art Simone and recently I found out that I
have a long lost twin thanks to the Concealed super salutes.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Yes you heard it right, I.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Have a long lost twin. And you know who that
long lost twin is? It's Dom Dollar. And I hear going,
who is Dom Dollar? That's what my mum said to
me anyway, And I said, well, you're the one that
should be answering questions, mum, because why do I have
a twin who is the same age as me, is
from Australia and looks identical?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
What's going on here? What's the true story?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
And you know, Avid Concealed listeners would know my mum
from her previous episode. Go and listen to it if
you haven't. But she wouldn't give up. She wouldn't give
you any information about my long lost twin. Was he
conceived in a test tube? We actually part of a
long lost government top secret testing thing. Are we like
twins separated at birth? There was that study where they
(01:06):
had they separated twins and put them in different housing
and different socioeconomical things and studied them for years. They
didn't even know each other.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Have I just cracked the code? Well, let me take
you back anyway.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
So we were posting a video on the socials and
someone commented that I zimone look like the gay version
of Dom Dollar. And if you don't know who Dom
Dollar is, he is a world famous DJ. He's currently
on the front page of the Rolling Stone. He got
the cover and he has lots of incredible songs like
insert song name here and that other song and also
(01:38):
a song with Turvilier.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Good for him, but it's not my cup of tea.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
But for example, if you are from Melbourne, his music
would go down really well at REVS or he's performed
underneath the car pass like underneath the road very festival,
and if you know anything about me, not involved with
festivals at all. So this is a real triumphant proof
that you know nature versus if you grew up in
the Northern Territory, apparently you want to be a DM
(02:04):
performance person. The only difference between me and Dom Dollar
is that Dom Dollar has a big old mustache. So
I emm a drag queen and I have a lace
front mustache in my possession. I pulled it out, glued
it on lah and behold, same person, same person.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
My whole life is a lie.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
So if anyone actually wants to know what Dom Dollar
looks like in drag, look at me. I have reached
out to Dom Dollar's people and asked to put him
in drag, but he has not replied to anything. It's
Pride month, gosh rude. But look, it's been quite fun.
It went very viral. It's over a million views on TikTok.
It's really hard for me, I will admit to you.
(02:43):
People's because I've been working very hard in my life
to be a superstar drag queen.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
You know, I've did lots of things.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
I worked for thirteen years to get my profile out there,
and in the last twelve months, the most popular I've
been has one for dressing is Cathday Night and two
for looking like Dom Dollar. So it's a been a
bit difficult for me personally. I am having an identity crisis.
Dom Dollar did comment on the video and he said
that he'll write the music and I can do the gigs.
(03:10):
So guys, you may be seeing me underneath the car
park road thing. I actually have been asked to do
a fake DJ said as Dom Dollar by one of
the clubs here in Melbourne. I was googling him earlier
because I don't really know much about him that except
that he stole my face.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
Rude.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
You know, you go on Google and you see the
suggested questions. The first question is how much does it
cost to hire Dom Dollar? And I'll tell you what
they say, forty five thousand dollars. I'd be a lot cheaper,
but I will not be Dom Dollar for legal purposes.
I will be either Dom doll Hairs or dumb Dollar.
But on celebrity look alikes. This is not the first
(03:47):
time this has happened to me, because I also get
recognized for another person, and that is the singer young
Blood and blood is spelt with you, but he's a
UK singer, artist, rockstar and apparently we look really similar,
so much so that I was at Mardi Gras afterparty
(04:07):
at Lame Way last year and you know, big night
the night before, so not feeling my best, but still
went out, you know, pride, and I got a tap
on the sholder while I was there with my friends
and this guy goes, I'm not sure if you get this,
but has anyone ever told you that you look like
and in that moment I was waiting for him to
(04:28):
go Art Simone, or I was waiting for him to
recognize me as Art, and I was like, oh, here
we go again. Yes, got me, Yes, it's me Art Simone.
And he goes young Blood. I said, what who? He
goes young Blood. You've even got the eyebrows. It's amazing.
Look at the eyebrows, all for you.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Come on?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
And I was surrounded by my group of friends who
have not let me live that down ever since, so
much so that they just changed my contact profile photos
to young Blood. They send me pictures of young Blood,
they say, have you ever seen the two of them
the room together? No, I am not young Blood, i
am not Dom Dollar, I'm not casfe Night.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
I'm Art Simon.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
But you know what, I'm happy for the attention, and
I'm grateful that my face. Maybe I've got a career
after I do drag and I have to not wear
makeup anymore. If I can look like all these people,
they're going to get hold too. So that's a long
lasting career if you ask me. Anyway, That's what's been
happening in my world. But stick around because coming up
the soapboxes back, we've got a little artifact to show you,
(05:29):
and I am going to be giving you the top
three celebrities that need.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
To be canceled right now. This is the palette cleanser.
Let's go see out of backs.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh, welcome back to the artifacts are I saw something
out of my purse and you have to listen to it.
It's show and tell for adults, and I get to
bring in some of my more cursed items. But also
don't forget if you also want to show off one
of your things, send a picture jump of the socials
and send it an email with a picture and I
can show it off to the people. Maybe don't even
explain what it is, and then I can try and
(06:02):
work it out.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
I'll get it wrong.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
But the item I brought for you from the depths
of my purse is a family heirloom that was gifted
to me when I was but a whee lass. There
may be something about me that you may have worked out.
But I am very hard on myself. I want to
do the best that I can, and when I don't
do the best that I can, I get really really
angry at myself. And it's happened since I was a kid.
I'm pretty sure. In the episode with My Mum, she
talks about the stories of me and kindergarten, where I'd
(06:26):
be really upset that I couldn't read and other people could.
The good news for you and me is that that
did not end at kindergarten, did not end in primary school.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
High school, nor on RuPaul's drag Race.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I made enemies in my brain about all the people
that were better at things than I was not healthy
to do. But apparently my family liked to encourage that
because there was one person. This was from high school.
The nickname for this person was smarty Pants, because they
really like to emphasize how much smarter they were than myself.
But also everyone I really didn't gel well with me.
(07:00):
You don't rub it in. So my grandmother misted me,
not needted me. So she's sewed from her used pantyhose,
so it's really got some of my beautiful grandmother's soul
in there. She created the smarty Pants voodoo dole, so
he is a.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Little voody doll boy.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
He's got a little smiley face on in a Marone
school uniform. And then this is the piece of resistance.
She has glued little smarties all over his pants, so
he's Smarty pants. He does come complete with a whole
bunch of pins. And I would use this in high
school to enact revenge on Smarty Pants.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Did it work? Absolutely not. Did it make me feel better?
Hell yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
This is not the only voodoo doll I have that
was made for me by a family member. And let's
just say that they're still being made to this day.
The gauntlet has been passed on and down to another
person in my family. Be careful because if you wrong me,
you may be too into one of these. We need
(08:12):
to cancel these celebrities, all right. You know, Katie Perry
is a currently canceled queen and she is touring the
country at the moment, and people aren't happy with her,
clearly because she went to space, well kind of went
to space. She floated for a bit and looked into
a camera and then kissed the ground. But they also
didn't like her because she was working with that producer
and made that bad song Woman's World.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
So people don't like it. They've canceled her.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
But you know what, after all of that, I think
she can kind of stick around because I recently found
out that we have something in common, Katy Perry and
I and it's not being you know, talented song people,
you know, singers, artists, actors, dancers, good looking.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Katie Perry also hates laboo boots so much so that
at a concert the other day she literally kicked one
out of someone's hands. She's like, so for that, I
am going to officially here today for everyone uncanceled.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Katie Perry.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Sorry, she's not the cancelation list, but I hear you going.
Well then, who else is on it? Don't worry, I've
got your sordered because I've got three celebrities that need
to be canceled right now. And I'm going to start
off pretty strong. Tyra Banks. Yeah, I'm starting off with
a really big strong one. Tyra Banks, who is now
a Sydney resident and just in the last week has
(09:25):
opened up her ice cream shop, Smise and Dream the
ice Cream Fantasy. She is unhinged. Look, I'm all for it.
I'm all for a crazy lady who's selling her wares.
But the thing that made me want to cancel her
is I was very fortunate enough to be invited to
the opening of this ice cream shop.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
So I got an invite.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
I just want to read you a few things from
this invite where I was like, Okay, this is too much, babes.
I know you're happy, you've got your open card and
you're going on the ferry. I know you're happy, you're
in Sydney, lovely weather, your family's here.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
That's good.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
But this is how intensely serious she is about her
SMIs and Dream ice Cream factory. It goes a bit
like this, I'm inviting you to step inside my SMIs
and Dream ice Cream fantasy.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
And this bit is in bold and yes, I'll be there.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Not that Ai ice cream hair chick at the top
of this invite, the real me, but with faux hair.
I'll personally be guiding you through the full on SMIs
and Dream ice Cream experience. This is not a basic
ice cream shop. This is Flavor Theater with epic lighting
(10:39):
that I made sure makes you look hot with the
wile the ice cream stays cold. I'll feed you my
stories and maybe spoon feed a few of you.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
This isn't just a launch, It's my dream.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
I want you right in the middle of it.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Wow, Tyra Mayle has really gone wild since America's next
Top Model.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Look. I love it. I'm sure it was written with
chat GPT, but it is so intense. It's a bit
of milfy.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
I mean, ice cream is sexy, and Tyra is sexy,
but I just wasn't prepared for that to be in
my inbox. And I feel like I needed a cold
shower or maybe a cold ice cream after it. But
I'm sorry, Tyra Banks, but for your unhinged ice cream fantasy,
you are canceled all right, next up on the list,
and it's probably gonna break a lot of people's hearts.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I'm gonna have to cancel Sarah Jessica Parker. Now she's gone.
She's gone.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
I've had enough, and you know why Love Sex in
the City and just like that also the worst name
for a TV show in the world. But if you
haven't had the pleasure of watching this television show, it
is the worst written thing I have ever seen. It
is so out of touch, it is so so bizarre.
The characters don't make any sense. And I love every
(12:04):
bit of it, like every bit, and I hate myself
for it, and I hate Sarah Jessica Parker for it.
I hate that she's made me fall in love with
this bizarre TV show that I have to watch every week.
I had to get a Max subscription so I could
watch it. Most people got that to watch The Last
of Us. No, I was so I can watch my
still little show with Sarah Jessica Parker and all her
little friends.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
It's really bad.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
So for catfishing me into wanting to watch your television
show and me secretly liking it. Sarah Jessica Parker, you
had cancer. Last one that canceled list today is singer,
acrobatic person, tight jumpsuit wearer Benson Boone. I'm sorry, Boone,
(12:49):
but you get in the boot. You were canceled and
I go go, why why?
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Oh? This guy's just winging.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
It's because he has a victim complex at the moment
I saw he release the whole music video like parroting
that everyone doesn't like him. What is going on? Just
sing your song and jump off the piano and shut up.
I do feel a bit bad for him because one
of the reviews said that apparently he wrote his album
in was it seventeen days or seventeen hours? I think
it was seventeen hours, And apparently you can tell I
(13:15):
won't be listening to it. Also, the boy's like twenty
two years old, but also looks like he's thirty eight,
and that's a bit ominous. Benson Boone, did you sell
your soul to the devil so you could flip?
Speaker 1 (13:25):
Was all?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
The flipping made the skin on your face move a
bit weirdly, So maybe it just doesn't find the place
to sit back down again.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
I don't know about aerodynamics or space travel, but I
think there's something weird happening when you flip. But Benson
Boone for atrocities to the jumpstick nation and victim complex.
When you really haven't got anything to complain about, you
might can backflip out of here, you bitch. So Box alright,
(13:54):
it's time for my favorite segment because I'm not required
to do anything.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
It's all up for you.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
It's the soap oop, where we give my beautiful podcast
airtime to.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
One of you. And it's that easy. You just need
a jump on the socials.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
We've got a link at the bio there where you
can send in a sixty second soapbox moment and here going, Well,
what's going in the soapbox? Well, it can be anything.
You could be spooking your wares. You could be sending
a message to someone out there. You could be promoting
a gig you're doing. You could be reading a poem
or singing a song. It's anything, and we're about to
find out what we have this week for our soapbox
(14:29):
because I I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Okay, here we go, but it's me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Your stomach. I've been trying to communicate with you for months,
but to no avail. It's a mess down here as
your stomach. I've been doing my best for babes. You
got to meet me halfway. I know you've said in
the past that you don't like kombucha. I know you've
said it's fizzy yogurt water. But I'm pleading with you
today on this podcast to give it another chance. I
(14:57):
your stomach desperately need those organic live cultures and antioxidants.
I'm begging you to try drinking Remedy kombucha. It's delicious
and I'm craving that sweet no sugar, all natural flavor.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Everything is making sense now because you know what rocked
up to my house yesterday, twelve bottles of Remedy komb butcher.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
I don't know how we made that happen. That's magical.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
I have said previously that kom Butcher is physiogurt water
and I'm not really a fan, but I did have
a very very tough time the last couple of weeks.
Without going into too much information, but the stomach was
not happy. So maybe this is the time. Okay, I
will vow here on this airtime to try this remedy
(15:47):
komb butcher, whatever it is, and maybe check in on
the socials to see what I think about it.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I'll put my update there. Thank you to my stomach
for sending that in, and thank you to a remedy. Well.
Thank you so much for joining us here for the
palate cleanser.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Once again, it's been an absolute joy to tickle your
equals here, and don't forget. If you want to jump online,
you can submit a voice note for either our soapbox,
which is where you can promoe anything.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
But also for arts advice. You want to bring that
segment back again for you.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
If you have anything you need a bit of help
with a bit of advice on I'm here to help you.
Just send through a voice note on our socials. Don't worry,
We'll be back next week with a new Concealed episode
and our guest is a crazy, redheaded ball of energy
who has a badger tatoo, is a pole.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Dancing diva, author and will never leave the country because
of what she's concealed. And then you've got to strap
in for that one, guys, so I can't wait for
you to hear it. I musimone.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
You're all waldy fabulous and we'll see you next week, babe,
We're back for another Palette Cleanser episode.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
I'm art Simone and recently I found out that I
have a long lost twin thanks to the Concealed super salutes.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Yes you heard it right, I.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Have a long lost twin. And you know who that
long lost twin is? It's Dom Dollar. And I hear going,
who is Dom Dollar? That's what my mum said to
me anyway, And I said, well, you're the one that
should be answering questions, mum, because why do I have
a twin who is the same age as me, is
from Australia and looks identical?
Speaker 1 (00:43):
What's going on here? What's the true story?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
And you know, Avid Concealed listeners would know my mum
from her previous episode. Go and listen to it if
you haven't. But she wouldn't give up. She wouldn't give
you any information about my long lost twin. Was he
conceived in a test tube? We actually part of a
long lost government top secret testing thing. Are we like
twins separated at birth? There was that study where they
(01:06):
had they separated twins and put them in different housing
and different socioeconomical things and studied them for years. They
didn't even know each other.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Have I just cracked the code? Well, let me take
you back anyway.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
So we were posting a video on the socials and
someone commented that I zimone look like the gay version
of Dom Dollar. And if you don't know who Dom
Dollar is, he is a world famous DJ. He's currently
on the front page of the Rolling Stone. He got
the cover and he has lots of incredible songs like
insert song name here and that other song and also
(01:38):
a song with Turvilier.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Good for him, but it's not my cup of tea.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
But for example, if you are from Melbourne, his music
would go down really well at REVS or he's performed
underneath the car pass like underneath the road very festival,
and if you know anything about me, not involved with
festivals at all. So this is a real triumphant proof
that you know nature versus if you grew up in
the Northern Territory, apparently you want to be a DM
(02:04):
performance person. The only difference between me and Dom Dollar
is that Dom Dollar has a big old mustache. So
I emm a drag queen and I have a lace
front mustache in my possession. I pulled it out, glued
it on lah and behold, same person, same person.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
My whole life is a lie.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
So if anyone actually wants to know what Dom Dollar
looks like in drag, look at me. I have reached
out to Dom Dollar's people and asked to put him
in drag, but he has not replied to anything. It's
Pride month, gosh rude. But look, it's been quite fun.
It went very viral. It's over a million views on TikTok.
It's really hard for me, I will admit to you.
(02:43):
People's because I've been working very hard in my life
to be a superstar drag queen.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
You know, I've did lots of things.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
I worked for thirteen years to get my profile out there,
and in the last twelve months, the most popular I've
been has one for dressing is Cathday Night and two
for looking like Dom Dollar. So it's a been a
bit difficult for me personally. I am having an identity crisis.
Dom Dollar did comment on the video and he said
that he'll write the music and I can do the gigs.
(03:10):
So guys, you may be seeing me underneath the car
park road thing. I actually have been asked to do
a fake DJ said as Dom Dollar by one of
the clubs here in Melbourne. I was googling him earlier
because I don't really know much about him that except
that he stole my face.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
Rude.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
You know, you go on Google and you see the
suggested questions. The first question is how much does it
cost to hire Dom Dollar? And I'll tell you what
they say, forty five thousand dollars. I'd be a lot cheaper,
but I will not be Dom Dollar for legal purposes.
I will be either Dom doll Hairs or dumb Dollar.
But on celebrity look alikes. This is not the first
(03:47):
time this has happened to me, because I also get
recognized for another person, and that is the singer young
Blood and blood is spelt with you, but he's a
UK singer, artist, rockstar and apparently we look really similar,
so much so that I was at Mardi Gras afterparty
(04:07):
at Lame Way last year and you know, big night
the night before, so not feeling my best, but still
went out, you know, pride, and I got a tap
on the sholder while I was there with my friends
and this guy goes, I'm not sure if you get this,
but has anyone ever told you that you look like
and in that moment I was waiting for him to
(04:28):
go Art Simone, or I was waiting for him to
recognize me as Art, and I was like, oh, here
we go again. Yes, got me, Yes, it's me Art Simone.
And he goes young Blood. I said, what who? He
goes young Blood. You've even got the eyebrows. It's amazing.
Look at the eyebrows, all for you.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Come on?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
And I was surrounded by my group of friends who
have not let me live that down ever since, so
much so that they just changed my contact profile photos
to young Blood. They send me pictures of young Blood,
they say, have you ever seen the two of them
the room together? No, I am not young Blood, i
am not Dom Dollar, I'm not casfe Night.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
I'm Art Simon.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
But you know what, I'm happy for the attention, and
I'm grateful that my face. Maybe I've got a career
after I do drag and I have to not wear
makeup anymore. If I can look like all these people,
they're going to get hold too. So that's a long
lasting career if you ask me. Anyway, That's what's been
happening in my world. But stick around because coming up
the soapboxes back, we've got a little artifact to show you,
(05:29):
and I am going to be giving you the top
three celebrities that need.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
To be canceled right now. This is the palette cleanser.
Let's go see out of backs.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh, welcome back to the artifacts are I saw something
out of my purse and you have to listen to it.
It's show and tell for adults, and I get to
bring in some of my more cursed items. But also
don't forget if you also want to show off one
of your things, send a picture jump of the socials
and send it an email with a picture and I
can show it off to the people. Maybe don't even
explain what it is, and then I can try and
(06:02):
work it out.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
I'll get it wrong.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
But the item I brought for you from the depths
of my purse is a family heirloom that was gifted
to me when I was but a whee lass. There
may be something about me that you may have worked out.
But I am very hard on myself. I want to
do the best that I can, and when I don't
do the best that I can, I get really really
angry at myself. And it's happened since I was a kid.
I'm pretty sure. In the episode with My Mum, she
talks about the stories of me and kindergarten, where I'd
(06:26):
be really upset that I couldn't read and other people could.
The good news for you and me is that that
did not end at kindergarten, did not end in primary school.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
High school, nor on RuPaul's drag Race.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I made enemies in my brain about all the people
that were better at things than I was not healthy
to do. But apparently my family liked to encourage that
because there was one person. This was from high school.
The nickname for this person was smarty Pants, because they
really like to emphasize how much smarter they were than myself.
But also everyone I really didn't gel well with me.
(07:00):
You don't rub it in. So my grandmother misted me,
not needted me. So she's sewed from her used pantyhose,
so it's really got some of my beautiful grandmother's soul
in there. She created the smarty Pants voodoo dole, so
he is a.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Little voody doll boy.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
He's got a little smiley face on in a Marone
school uniform. And then this is the piece of resistance.
She has glued little smarties all over his pants, so
he's Smarty pants. He does come complete with a whole
bunch of pins. And I would use this in high
school to enact revenge on Smarty Pants.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Did it work? Absolutely not. Did it make me feel better?
Hell yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
This is not the only voodoo doll I have that
was made for me by a family member. And let's
just say that they're still being made to this day.
The gauntlet has been passed on and down to another
person in my family. Be careful because if you wrong me,
you may be too into one of these. We need
(08:12):
to cancel these celebrities, all right. You know, Katie Perry
is a currently canceled queen and she is touring the
country at the moment, and people aren't happy with her,
clearly because she went to space, well kind of went
to space. She floated for a bit and looked into
a camera and then kissed the ground. But they also
didn't like her because she was working with that producer
and made that bad song Woman's World.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
So people don't like it. They've canceled her.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
But you know what, after all of that, I think
she can kind of stick around because I recently found
out that we have something in common, Katy Perry and
I and it's not being you know, talented song people,
you know, singers, artists, actors, dancers, good looking.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
Katie Perry also hates laboo boots so much so that
at a concert the other day she literally kicked one
out of someone's hands. She's like, so for that, I
am going to officially here today for everyone uncanceled.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Katie Perry.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Sorry, she's not the cancelation list, but I hear you going.
Well then, who else is on it? Don't worry, I've
got your sordered because I've got three celebrities that need
to be canceled right now. And I'm going to start
off pretty strong. Tyra Banks. Yeah, I'm starting off with
a really big strong one. Tyra Banks, who is now
a Sydney resident and just in the last week has
(09:25):
opened up her ice cream shop, Smise and Dream the
ice Cream Fantasy. She is unhinged. Look, I'm all for it.
I'm all for a crazy lady who's selling her wares.
But the thing that made me want to cancel her
is I was very fortunate enough to be invited to
the opening of this ice cream shop.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
So I got an invite.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
I just want to read you a few things from
this invite where I was like, Okay, this is too much, babes.
I know you're happy, you've got your open card and
you're going on the ferry. I know you're happy, you're
in Sydney, lovely weather, your family's here.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
That's good.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
But this is how intensely serious she is about her
SMIs and Dream ice Cream factory. It goes a bit
like this, I'm inviting you to step inside my SMIs
and Dream ice Cream fantasy.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
And this bit is in bold and yes, I'll be there.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Not that Ai ice cream hair chick at the top
of this invite, the real me, but with faux hair.
I'll personally be guiding you through the full on SMIs
and Dream ice Cream experience. This is not a basic
ice cream shop. This is Flavor Theater with epic lighting
(10:39):
that I made sure makes you look hot with the
wile the ice cream stays cold. I'll feed you my
stories and maybe spoon feed a few of you.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
This isn't just a launch, It's my dream.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
I want you right in the middle of it.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Wow, Tyra Mayle has really gone wild since America's next
Top Model.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Look. I love it. I'm sure it was written with
chat GPT, but it is so intense. It's a bit
of milfy.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
I mean, ice cream is sexy, and Tyra is sexy,
but I just wasn't prepared for that to be in
my inbox. And I feel like I needed a cold
shower or maybe a cold ice cream after it. But
I'm sorry, Tyra Banks, but for your unhinged ice cream fantasy,
you are canceled all right, next up on the list,
and it's probably gonna break a lot of people's hearts.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I'm gonna have to cancel Sarah Jessica Parker. Now she's gone.
She's gone.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
I've had enough, and you know why Love Sex in
the City and just like that also the worst name
for a TV show in the world. But if you
haven't had the pleasure of watching this television show, it
is the worst written thing I have ever seen. It
is so out of touch, it is so so bizarre.
The characters don't make any sense. And I love every
(12:04):
bit of it, like every bit, and I hate myself
for it, and I hate Sarah Jessica Parker for it.
I hate that she's made me fall in love with
this bizarre TV show that I have to watch every week.
I had to get a Max subscription so I could
watch it. Most people got that to watch The Last
of Us. No, I was so I can watch my
still little show with Sarah Jessica Parker and all her
little friends.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
It's really bad.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
So for catfishing me into wanting to watch your television
show and me secretly liking it. Sarah Jessica Parker, you
had cancer. Last one that canceled list today is singer,
acrobatic person, tight jumpsuit wearer Benson Boone. I'm sorry, Boone,
(12:49):
but you get in the boot. You were canceled and
I go go, why why?
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Oh? This guy's just winging.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
It's because he has a victim complex at the moment
I saw he release the whole music video like parroting
that everyone doesn't like him. What is going on? Just
sing your song and jump off the piano and shut up.
I do feel a bit bad for him because one
of the reviews said that apparently he wrote his album
in was it seventeen days or seventeen hours? I think
it was seventeen hours, And apparently you can tell I
(13:15):
won't be listening to it. Also, the boy's like twenty
two years old, but also looks like he's thirty eight,
and that's a bit ominous. Benson Boone, did you sell
your soul to the devil so you could flip?
Speaker 1 (13:25):
Was all?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
The flipping made the skin on your face move a
bit weirdly, So maybe it just doesn't find the place
to sit back down again.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
I don't know about aerodynamics or space travel, but I
think there's something weird happening when you flip. But Benson
Boone for atrocities to the jumpstick nation and victim complex.
When you really haven't got anything to complain about, you
might can backflip out of here, you bitch. So Box alright,
(13:54):
it's time for my favorite segment because I'm not required
to do anything.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
It's all up for you.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
It's the soap oop, where we give my beautiful podcast
airtime to.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
One of you. And it's that easy. You just need
a jump on the socials.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
We've got a link at the bio there where you
can send in a sixty second soapbox moment and here going, Well,
what's going in the soapbox? Well, it can be anything.
You could be spooking your wares. You could be sending
a message to someone out there. You could be promoting
a gig you're doing. You could be reading a poem
or singing a song. It's anything, and we're about to
find out what we have this week for our soapbox
(14:29):
because I I'm not sure.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Okay, here we go, but it's me.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Your stomach. I've been trying to communicate with you for months,
but to no avail. It's a mess down here as
your stomach. I've been doing my best for babes. You
got to meet me halfway. I know you've said in
the past that you don't like kombucha. I know you've
said it's fizzy yogurt water. But I'm pleading with you
today on this podcast to give it another chance. I
(14:57):
your stomach desperately need those organic live cultures and antioxidants.
I'm begging you to try drinking Remedy kombucha. It's delicious
and I'm craving that sweet no sugar, all natural flavor.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Everything is making sense now because you know what rocked
up to my house yesterday, twelve bottles of Remedy komb butcher.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
I don't know how we made that happen. That's magical.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
I have said previously that kom Butcher is physiogurt water
and I'm not really a fan, but I did have
a very very tough time the last couple of weeks.
Without going into too much information, but the stomach was
not happy. So maybe this is the time. Okay, I
will vow here on this airtime to try this remedy
(15:47):
komb butcher, whatever it is, and maybe check in on
the socials to see what I think about it.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
I'll put my update there. Thank you to my stomach
for sending that in, and thank you to a remedy. Well.
Thank you so much for joining us here for the
palate cleanser.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Once again, it's been an absolute joy to tickle your
equals here, and don't forget. If you want to jump online,
you can submit a voice note for either our soapbox,
which is where you can promoe anything.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
But also for arts advice. You want to bring that
segment back again for you.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
If you have anything you need a bit of help
with a bit of advice on I'm here to help you.
Just send through a voice note on our socials. Don't worry,
We'll be back next week with a new Concealed episode
and our guest is a crazy, redheaded ball of energy
who has a badger tatoo, is a pole.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Dancing diva, author and will never leave the country because
of what she's concealed. And then you've got to strap
in for that one, guys, so I can't wait for
you to hear it. I musimone.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
You're all waldy fabulous and we'll see you next week, babe,
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