BRIDAL ERA ALERT!
I've joined forces with Rachel Schwab from Just Because It's Pretty and Stephanie Cardenas to wade through the waves of engagement bliss and the meticulous crafting of a dream wedding.
 We share our own, reasons behind a long engagement isn't about rushing; it's about relishing every detail that leads to 'I do.'Choosing bridesmaids can be like navigating a minefield of emotions and obligations, but it's a journey we dissect with heartfelt candor and a sprinkle of creativity.
Dress shopping we don't hold back on the details of our own quests for the gown that whispers 'the one.' From the emotional support of a stylist to the revelation that your dream dress may have been waiting on your Pinterest board all along,
We're here to share the trials and triumphs as if you were right there with us!
Stephanie Cardenas's IG:
@stephhcardenas
Stephanie Cardenas's Tiktok:
@stephhhcardenas
Rachel Schwab aka Just Because It's Pretty's IG:
@justbecauseitspretty
Rachel Schwab aka Just Because It's Pretty TikTok:
@justbecauseitspretty
You can watch the full episodes on our Youtube
Youtube - Confessionsofawannabeitgirl
Confessions of A Wannabe It Girl’s TikTok:
@wannabeitgirlpodcast
Confessions of A Wannabe It Girl’s IG:
@confessionsofawannabeitgirl
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome to Confessions of a Wannabe it Girl
.
I'm your host, marley Fregging,and I'm here to help you filter
out all the bullshit and becomethe next it Girl.
This podcast explores thereality of what it really takes
to make it out there.
As it turns out, it is way lessInstagrammable than I thought
it was going to be.
I'm still very much a work inprogress, but there's simply
(00:27):
nothing else I'd rather be doingthan chasing my dreams.
So let's learn from my mistakesand work together to achieve
our dreams with more confidence,clarity and direction.
Let's get after it All right.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Well, guys, welcome to what are we calling this?
The bridal round table, thebridal era?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I don't know Our wedding episode.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that'scute, that's cute.
All the things, all the things.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
There's just so much, too many things.
Okay, so I'm joined by Rachel,or, as you might know, her just
because it's pretty, andStephanie Cardenas how are you
guys?
Thank you guys so much forbeing here.
Thank you, we're excited.
I am so excited to start withall things.
(01:11):
Wedding you know, there's notas much.
I mean, maybe there is.
I just didn't really like thepodcast resources I found
regarding a wedding information,so I'm very excited to dive
into it.
We are all three engaged.
I've known you both not beingengaged, both second time.
Podcast.
Returning guests yes, look atus.
I know I'm so excited, so let'sstart with when you got engaged
(01:33):
and when is your wedding.
Steph, do you want to go first?
Cool Me, I'm like Rachel, okay.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
So when I got engaged and when is my wedding?
Yes, okay, I got engaged.
So, when I got engaged and whenis my wedding?
Yes, okay, I got engaged Me.
I got engaged September 7th2022 in Paris, france, with my
fiance, obviously.
Who else would it be?
So, yeah, that happened aboutit's 2024.
(02:00):
Like two years ago, which is,or a year and a half going to be
, but, yeah, best experienceever, and then I will be getting
married July 13th at 2024.
So, like two and a half months.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Oh fuck so like tomorrow literally tomorrow
actually.
I'm late to my wedding.
She needs to be in hair andmakeup.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
No, actually, yeah, so oh my gosh, it comes by so
fast.
And then Rachel actually yeah.
So, oh, my gosh, it comes by sofast.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
And then, rachel, when did you get engaged?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
I got engaged last May in Florence, italy.
Look at us abroad, girls.
We were on a trip after hismedical school graduation and
Florence is my favorite place,so he proposed there.
It was lovely.
More than lovely.
I wish I knew the exact date,but I don't, so we won't tell
anyone.
More than lovely.
I wish I knew the exact date,but I don't, so we won't tell
anyone.
And then I'm getting marriednext April, so April 4th 2025.
So it's a long engagement too.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah, I'm going to double down on the long
engagement as well.
I mean, I did a whole podcastepisode about it, so we're not
going to go deep into my storyhere at all, but I got engaged
July 8th 2023, and we will begetting married May 17th 2025.
Yep, yes, okay, love it, loveit.
So we all chose longengagements.
Why?
Speaker 1 (03:16):
did you choose?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
long engagement stuff .
Speaker 3 (03:19):
So for me one when we got engaged abroad too, it was
it was just a trip we were goingon and like we have been
together for so long.
So when it happened, it wasmore of like the anticipation of
engagement.
And when, yeah, the day came,you don't know what you're going
to feel.
I mean obviously excitement andstuff.
But I was just so on cloud nine, like it was almost so euphoric
(03:42):
that I was like I want to livein this bubble and it was the
best.
Because when I got engaged Iwas actually by myself and my
whole life.
I thought I was going to havelike family there and stuff.
But I was so happy in that twoweek bubble I didn't even post
my engagement till like twoweeks later.
I was literally going to bringthat up.
I was literally.
I was like happy, and so Ireally enjoyed that part of it
and I really just wanted to beengaged.
(04:03):
I feel like a lot of peoplekind of like rush into it, and I
come from a family that doesn'tdo all this traditional wedding
stuff.
My fiance's family is very like.
I think when we got engaged,the first thing they asked was
like when's the date?
And I was like he just asked me, you know, and so I wasn't even
thinking about it.
So I really took my time andfor me it just felt better to
(04:23):
kind of I don't know, just like,take your time with it.
Yeah, milk it, like this is theonly time we'll ever get to do
all this fun stuff.
So milk it.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
No, I totally agree with that.
It was in the acting classLiterally yeah.
Be in the bridal.
I was in the acting class and,like I was talking, I just met
this guy new acting class and Iwas like no, enjoy it.
He'd just been married.
He was like enjoy it, it's theshortest period in your
relationship.
I was like that's interesting.
That is so true.
Unless I mean you met one monthand got married a month too,
(04:56):
then that's not true.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
But for everyone else that applies, then we need to
be having a differentconversation.
Yeah, yeah, it's so different.
We're all worried aboutdifferent things.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
But like it's so funny you say long engagement
because honestly, like whatwe're all around like a two year
mark where we I feel likethat's not even long I feel like
that's like girl.
Realistically that's how longpeople should take, because the
process one is like a lot andyou just have to be on the same
page, so it's really not thatlong.
Like I feel like longengagement is like pushing the
light if you're like five years,yeah, yeah.
(05:22):
I feel like we're like normaland I have a friend who is still
on her.
She's going on her 12th year ofengagement, yeah, and when I
met her she was engaged andshe's still engaged and I was
like, oh, y'all are just vibing.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
You're vibing with it , Rachel.
Why did you?
Speaker 4 (05:40):
choose the long engagement.
That's a great well, it'sactually pretty simple.
So my brother got engaged a fewweeks before me.
He's 30.
So he's five years older thanme and he's getting married next
weekend.
So his date I know.
So his date was already set andpart of it was like we cannot
be planning two weddings at once.
(06:00):
That is, that's so much.
My poor mother, she does notneed to do that.
And the other part of it I hada few friends who were getting
married in the fall.
So then when we were looking atdates I didn't want it to be
too much for my friends.
I was very much thinking ofeveryone else when picking a
date.
I have a friend group of 13from college.
That's a lot.
(06:21):
To go to three weddings inthree months, that's ridiculous.
Then I wanted good weather.
I can't speak, not like youguys.
It's so great to get marriedhere.
I'm in New York everyoneJanuary February.
It's a little dreary, it's notreally beautiful.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
It's kind of the same here, though it's been worse
recently.
Us complaining about 60s.
We're in Canadian.
Same here, though it's beenrecently it's been worse, yeah,
us complaining about.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
No, I know in like a what's that was canadian goose
sweaters like yeah sweater,jacket what are those called?
Speaker 3 (06:52):
I hear you, I hear you.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
What's a fucking jacket canada, goose, canada
there we go.
So that I would say half of itwas that and the other half is
that I am such a meticulousplanner like I wanted to be able
to focus on one thing at a timeand do it like really right.
Like I've been dreaming aboutthis my whole life, haven't we
all?
And so like, for example,bridesmaid proposal like I
(07:14):
didn't want to have to like rushsomething like that.
Like I want to be able to focuson that, and then the shower,
and then the bachelorette, likethere's so many things you have
to plan.
So I was like let's spread itout, I don't need to rush into
any of this.
We're young, we're happy, Iwant to be engaged for a while,
like let's get married when wewant to get married on our own
time, type of thing, and also togive me time to plan everything
(07:37):
very meticulously and not bestressed.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
I feel very similar to that, except for you're like
nice and you're being consciousof all your friends, which I
would like to say is myreasoning for doing it too.
But honestly, I like, justdon't want to share.
The attention is the truth.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I love that for you.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
I love that for you.
Thank you, you shouldn't.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Thank you, no, totally.
So you know, speaking ofbridesmaids, seeing it kind of
got brought up, I feel like it'skind of people are like a
little in or all out onbridesmaids these days, yeah,
Like are you?
Having bridesmaids.
I know you're havingbridesmaids and I'm really
curious to dive into yourSomething Blue as well.
Oh, we'll talk.
Rachel, kick us off.
Tell us about your bridesmaids.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
Okay, so for a second , I was not going to have
bridesmaids.
I have.
I feel very fortunate.
I have a lot of really closefriends.
I have college friends, homefriends, camp friends.
I have a lot of cousins.
I sadly don't have any sisters,but I will have three soon to
be sisters through marriage andmy brothers.
(08:41):
So there are so many people inmy life and I was like how am I
supposed to have a normal amountLike so wild to me.
So then I was like no, like Iwant people around me wearing
pink.
I was like I don't want to getready alone.
That sounds sad.
Like so lots of thought.
I had went through differentways of how I could have
(09:03):
different people in my life, bea part of it and not just be
bridesmaids.
I mean, realistically, we allknow it being a bridesmaid is
such a fake title.
I mean it's so sweet, but likeyou're literally just wearing a
colored dress, like there's notmuch more to it.
Um, and you know, I was reallystressed about the whole
bridesmaid thing for sure,because I just couldn't choose
(09:27):
certain people versus not.
And I'm still having troublewith it, even though I asked my
bridesmaids already.
I totally still feel guiltythat I couldn't include all of
my friends bridesmaids.
(09:49):
I think it is half of itsfamily, um, no cousins.
And so I had to think of otherways to incorporate other
friends, because I was like Ican't do this and a lot of them
are like set numbers of peopleas well, and so I would never
just have like one or two likeright, you can tell I'm feeling
really guilty.
So I had some of my collegefriends, some home friends and
abroad friends, whateverbridesmaids we can talk about
the whole proposal thing later.
(10:10):
But I did that.
And then my camp friends.
I grew up with them, I've knownthem since I was seven, eight.
They're such important peopleto me and I wanted to honor them
in a different way.
So our camp colors were blueand gold and I was like like how
cute would it be if I askedthem to be my something blue, so
they're kind of wear blue tothe wedding.
(10:30):
I did a whole little thing forthem too.
They're obviously coming on thebachelorette, all that fun
stuff, so it's like anunofficial bridesmaid basically.
Uh, and I thought it was justanother fun way to kind of have
them involved, have themincorporated in like a special
part of the day and then I don'tneed to think of like I don't
(10:51):
know I need, I don't need towear blue shoes or something.
So that's what I did for themand I also think it's a really
good idea if someone doesn'twant to have bridesmaids, like a
fun way to incorporate yourfriends without being like it's
so official.
It's like a fun way toincorporate your friends without
being like it's so official,and then I don't think I even
posted about this.
But I'm having my cousin.
I know I'm having my cousins.
(11:13):
There's literally so manypeople and I'm like I can't, I
don't know what to do.
So I'm having my cousins usherthe ceremony, like another way
to honor different people, andthey're going to wear a hot pink
too.
So more pink.
Everyone's going to be happy.
So I know who would havethought sorry everyone, you have
(11:34):
to wear a pink, Um.
so I came up with a lot ofunique ideas to incorporate
everyone, but still stressedabout the bridesmaid thing, even
though it's done.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
No, totally.
How did you feel about thebridesmaids?
How many bridesmaids do youhave?
Speaker 3 (11:48):
I don't have a single bridesmaid, you just have the
maid of honor.
I just have a maid of honor.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yes, we're getting the flip.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Wow.
No, wait but same likeLiterally the opposite, because
I'm not having a maid of honor.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Yeah, Like so I'm doing the well, we're kind of
doing the same thing.
Like I was just so stressedabout all these people in my
life.
I moved a lot growing up and soI have so many important people
from just different areas of mylife.
I also have, like my fiance'sfamily, Like my.
I have two brothers also do nothave two sisters, Like okay.
I do have two sisters but theyare not like we didn't grow up
together.
So, yeah, it wasn't like this,like, oh, I have two sisters to
(12:29):
help me, one's like super little, and then the eldest one she's
40.
And so I'm like there's justlike a big disconnect.
So I was like, okay, I onlyhave two brothers like in my
immediate family and I was justlike they both have long-term
relationships too, too, that I'mclose to, and so many things.
So I was just like I'm notgoing to do it and I'm just
going to like have differentroles in my wedding where people
(12:52):
will feel special and like apart of it.
And then the Bachelorette waslike it's a big one, I'm going
in two weeks.
Where are you going?
I'm going to Cartagena,colombia.
That's where my family's fromColombia.
So I just thought of doing iton the coast over there Felt
like very special to me.
My cousin and some of myfriends are also from there.
So it was like perfect and Iwanted people to kind of get a
(13:14):
taste of who I was.
So, yeah, I just I didn't wantto stress about the dresses,
like you said, it really is justa title and I have nothing
against, like you know,bridesmaids at all.
It wasn't this like vendetta,because I feel like on TikTok
you get.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
People are angry.
Yeah, people are angry.
Bridesmaids like I love them.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
I love that.
We could just be like oh my god, love that for you.
Here's why I did it, but alsolove that for you, and this is
why I did like it's just a combo, yeah, um, yeah.
I was not like I know somepeople uh couldn't do all of
that.
I'm having a wedding here in LA.
Me and my fiance are the onlyones here, so to have
bridesmaids for me and to havethis like job role on these
(13:54):
friends who are already flyinghere for my wedding, I just
thought it was going to be toomuch because they would have to
do all this other stuff on topof buying an outfit, on top of
buying.
I was just like no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Everyone's in.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Texas, and let's just who can come to the
bachelorette can come.
It does not mean you're abridesmaid or not, you are just
like my best friend, and so itjust helped so much, cause I
actually had a lot of friendswho were like I can't make it if
I want to go to your wedding.
You know, I don't know.
There's like so many thingsthat come into play.
So same thing I was trying tobe very conscious about, like my
(14:29):
friend situations and there'sother weddings, people know
other people.
I was like you're alreadycoming to LA.
I just care about you coming toLA, so don't worry about this
whole bridesmaid title.
If you can make it to thebachelorette, come to the
bachelorette.
And I'm so happy.
It all turned out perfect andI'm going to party with my BFFs
and I'm so excited.
We love that, we love that.
Speaker 4 (14:47):
So how many people are going on the bachelorette?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Yeah, Because I'm so- .
Speaker 4 (14:50):
Doing basically the same thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
Okay, cool.
So it's 10 of us, but I hadoriginally invited quite a few.
Like I had my little collegegroup, but I have a high school
group I've stayed really closeto.
I have my childhood bestfriends and then cousins.
Also, I'm Latina, I come from abig family, so I had cousins
and stuff, but it all worked outand so, yeah, it turned out to
be 10 of us and so one of mybest friends is Charlie.
(15:13):
He's coming on the trip, buthe's also my officiant.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
So it's like everyone .
Speaker 3 (15:16):
yeah, has like I love that.
Yeah, they're double role.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
My cousin's my maid of honor, so she's the only one
I asked cutest proposal ever,like, like I said I'm the first.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Oh my god, it's all on her instagram.
I was like, wait, I have to go.
Look, you have to.
It was the most intimate, chillthing.
But like I thought it was justso precious.
Um, I like I said, don't tellus.
I made like a little customizedbox for her, super simple, but
it was like all really cutie.
I got her name engraved on likea ysl lipstick.
Her favorite like lip color isa red lip, so got her a classic
YSL, got her name on it.
I did like Jo Malone scentedcandles like a makeup bag.
(15:53):
Yeah, I kind of went for a moredesigner feel because she
really likes designer items andshe's just one girl, so I was
like I can spoil you.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I didn't have to pay for like 10 other people.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
Yeah, I know Jealous Respectfully.
But like love you guys.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
But it was nice to do it for one person, oh, yeah,
well, so this will take me rightinto my next question.
I'll tell you I haven't askedmine yet.
Yeah, nope, we have time.
We have time.
Well, that's, I'm curious.
Yeah, actually think I'm thebasic bitch in this like
situation.
I'm doing it very traditional,like I will have a maid of honor
(16:26):
and I will have bridesmaids, um, and no one's about to be
surprised, like everyone knows.
So, but when did you guys yeah,whatever.
When did you guys ask them Likehow far out did you feel like
this is comfy?
Speaker 3 (16:38):
for me, I know yours will probably, cause she has
more bridesmaids just for for mymaid of honor.
They all live out of town, likeI said.
So in September I had booked mywedding dress appointment and I
live here alone.
So I was like, oh my God, mymom needs to come, my grandma
needs to come.
So my cousin, who is now mymaid of honor, came with her mom
.
So anyway, we went to go try ondresses.
(17:00):
So I took them to do the wholeexperience and since she was
already in town from Florida, Ijust decided to ask her there.
So that was in September andI'm getting married in July.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
I can't math.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
I don't know.
So six something around morethan six months before.
I mean, I feel like I also tookmy time, though, because it was
just one girl and like we hadalready been kind of like I've
been hinting it for a time, butI was literally like you don't
have to do anything besides planthe Columbia trip, because
she's born and raised inColumbia.
So I was like you can that isyour one job and it was perfect,
(17:34):
cause I've been chilling guys.
It just had to have been like oh, venmo, okay, yeah, and I'll
just send you Venmo.
I'm so jealous.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I know.
So, rachel, flip side for you.
When did you decide?
Because you'd been engaged forabout a year-ish, and then you
asked.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah, and how many months was it away from the
wedding?
I I asked.
I believe it was February orend of January, so it definitely
was a good amount of timebefore.
Honestly, it just kind of feltlike the next natural thing that
I needed to do in terms ofwedding planning.
And there were some people outof town actually, two of my
(18:08):
bridesmaids live in LA.
They didn't come in.
I was like that's ridiculous.
Do not spend money on a flightto come in for this brunch that
I'm doing.
I'll mail them all to you.
But another friend who happenedto be in town that weekend.
So it all just kind of workedout and, honestly, my mom and
brother were available to helpme set it all up.
So that was really why, and Idon't know, just felt like kind
(18:32):
of the next natural thing, likedid the engagement party did the
venue, and then it was likethat was the next natural thing.
Like did the engagement partydid the venue, and then it was
like that was the next thing.
I don't know how else to say it.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
It just felt right, so I just yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:43):
I think I was ready to commit.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Yeah, I'm almost there.
I'm like, okay.
So once I hit the one year mark, I think I'm going to be like
all right, it's time, but fun,fun, hack.
This is so embarrassing.
I bought some of the gifts togo in the box because I am going
all out in these boxes.
I've had a year to save forthem and whatnot.
I bought some of the stuff onBlack Friday Perfect Genius.
(19:07):
No, literally.
Thank you, genius.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
My engraving.
It was kind of on accident, butwhen I went to go get her stuff
Sephora was doing some at thepro Promotion.
They were doing oh, you can getall.
If you buy a designer item,whatever, you get the free
engravement.
But then I got the YSL makeupbag through that, so like go to
your local Sephora oh, we lovethat and ask and see if they're
doing.
But if you live in LA, go tothe Grove.
Go to the Grove Because theygave me and I like I was like
(19:32):
talking to the girl, I was likethis is for my cousin, she's
going to be my maid of honor,and she went to the back and got
me two more YSL little makeupbags and they were perfect for
the aesthetic.
So like just ask.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
That's the thing Milk the engagement.
That's the beauty of having thetime Milk them in terms of the
gifting, I'm always trying toget free dessert.
Acting like we got engagedyesterday, that's like not real.
I love that we just got engaged.
It's been your anniversary.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
I'm like we're thinking about doing engagement
photo shoots here Like no, I amnot Like shut up, no, but I
think, like you said, a year isperfect, because now that I
asked her in September and yeah,that was a year, right after of
our engagement.
Like I said, I only had onegirl, but, like for you, I feel
like, yeah, you're right on timegirl.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Thanks, flip-flflopping, seeing it kind
of came up a little bit.
Let's talk about dresses.
You've obviously said yes tothe dress.
I don't know if you have.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
I just did.
Last.
Was it last week or two weeksago?
Oh my gosh, I just said yes tothe dress.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Beautiful I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh it first.
Okay, fine, yeah, mine'scollecting dust, actually, no, I
haven't even gotten how fuckingridiculous.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Is it that we have to order them so in advance?
It blows my mind.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Yeah, I was like a week off and he was like if you
wait one more week you'll haveto do expedited, and I was like
huh.
I'm like I thought I had plentyof time so I went to well, it
was previously called KingsleyJames.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
I don't know why, I said that Now Jackson James, now
Jackson James.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I just went there last weekend.
Yeah, you know, girl yeah yeah,I got the whole email.
So I went to Jackson James andI got Kim Casas.
Should I say that?
I don't know?
It's up to you.
Yeah, I feel like I can.
I'm excited for you.
Yeah, I don't think anyone elseis like I'm thinking of my
fiance.
He's not going to go.
What's a Kim Casas?
Speaker 2 (21:23):
If he listens to this , God bless him.
So I got a.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Kim Casas gown and she was like a designer that I
had been obsessed with, like I'mvery much like a Bridgerton.
It's like the theater girlinside of me, I guess.
But I wanted drama, I wanteduniqueness.
I can give you guys a littlesneak peek.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Yeah, I was going to say we'll do some photo.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Yeah, I want to see, I'll give you guys a little
sneak peek.
But I wanted something sodifferent.
So I was actually reallyfatigued going into looking for
dresses because I felt like Iwas looking at the same dress at
all times, which, like I havenothing against.
It's popular for a reason I getit, I respect it but for me
like nothing, felt likeStephanie and so, yeah, I went
(22:04):
with my mom.
My grandma was the first timeever doing that.
My grandma got married likesuper young.
So she you know it was likethose traditional, like Catholic
church, like you got married byShoulders covered.
Yeah, literally.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Exactly like you got married by shoulders.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Yeah, literally Exactly, and like she's a, she's
also she was a head tailor atDillard's for so many years.
She designed like wedding gownsas well.
Oh fuck, she's picking these up.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Yeah, she's like four , nine, and she was literally
like in Columbia I used to makethese gowns, so like something
better.
Wow, me and I would.
I was like okay, okay, okay, um.
So my mom was like lovedanything and everything.
She never got married, myparents never got married, so my
mom was like on cloud nine.
I wanted to give her thatexperience.
And they both, like all threeof us kind of I have the video
(22:46):
and we all like went towards theKim Casas section anyway,
before I even told them about it, and we all like hovered and we
all kind of like picked thesetwo gowns that were like one was
the dress I ended up gettingand the other one was the one I
went in for, and they were likeout of these, like the whole
store, these two, and so we wereall kind of already on the same
page.
Synergy yeah, that's great,though I had an amazing guy help
(23:11):
me.
He, oh, my God, I believe it'sCorey.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
I think that's the most important part, your
stylist.
Speaker 3 (23:17):
Yes.
My stylist Makes or breaks theexperience he was literally the
only man there and at first Igot a little nervous cause I was
like, oh my God, I got the onlyman, like okay, I hope it works
out Like not that that's aproblem.
But I was just like yeah, youjust like you don't know.
And he is literally now named myfairy godmother, like we cried
in.
I'm not even being dramatic.
(23:38):
I know this sounds so dramatic,but I have never had such a
more magical experience in mylife.
He really hooked it up.
He knew I was a content creatortoo, but he also understood
that, like I'm paying for my ownwedding, yeah.
So he like hooked me up with agreat collaboration on this
dress as well.
I've got to.
I've got to with a greatcollaboration on this dress as
well.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
I've got to, I've got to.
Oh wow, Literally that wassmart of you.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Yeah, like dream partnership with Jackson James.
I know they do work with a lotof other girls, but I was
shocked because I I don't feellike I was as big as them.
So I was just like that'llnever happen to me and he just
like, very yeah very god.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
It was amazing.
I got my dream dress, my dreamveil.
He was like here, veil's on meand I was like shut up.
Speaker 3 (24:25):
No, I'm not joking, those are expensive.
Why are they so expensive?
It's literally two.
No one told us about that.
I was literally.
I was going to say a word.
I probably can't say on apodcast, but I was just
speechless.
You could cuss.
No, I was literally.
I was gagged because I wasliterally like what?
But yeah, it was like such abeautiful experience.
I think we got a little tooturnt on champagne with my
grandma and my mom, but he justloved my family.
He actually doesn't work thereanymore, he just left, but I was
(24:46):
like I was his last like client.
It was meant to be and he wentout all out for me.
He was like you're such a, yourfamily, you are just great
vibes.
And so, yeah, my finding mywedding dress and like trying it
on and having it with this guywas like the best experience of
my life, like I was like I'llnever have something so magical.
But every other dress was astruggle, though.
I was like this is a scam didyou have?
Speaker 2 (25:08):
well, did you have the traditional?
Like tears in your eyes um,this is the fucking dress.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
I not the first time.
I tried mine on twice, so Iwent back so that day I knew it
was it.
But he was like can you give ita second?
Speaker 4 (25:22):
And I was like okay, I'll give it a second.
Mad respect to him Honestly.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I was telling him how detailed I've been with my
wedding.
I'm so intentional.
I haven't been impulsive at all.
Everything I want is for areason, and he could feel that.
And so I ended up going backwith my fiance's family and my
two best friends from here in LA, and there I cried because I
think I let myself, I think thelast few times.
(25:47):
You know you also, you try onso many.
I don't know about y'all, but Itried on so many and sometimes
like you're in a $15,000 gownand I was like I'm not going to
make myself cry Like I wanted tocry, but there's no way that I
can't like it, exactly so Ithink a lot of it was that I was
like there's so many and Ididn't want to get myself to
(26:08):
like it, but my dress was like.
The second time I put it on toshow my fiance's family, I like
cried and everyone in the storewas like you look like the
Virgin Mary and I was likecrying and I was just like
really it was hilarious, I wasdying.
But yeah, I did cry the secondtime, but not the first time.
I had a lot of body dysmorphiagoing on.
(26:30):
Yeah, honest, yeah, I was likeI tried on so many dresses
because I always thought I wasgoing to be an A-line girly, not
me just like hijacking thedress I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
No, we love to Sorry, Rachel, no go, go ahead.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
But I always thought I was going to be an A-line
girly, yeah, and when I wastrying on dresses like ball
gowns, I was like that's alittle too much for me.
Mermaid's not for me.
The straighter dresses, likeyou know, the cool girl dresses
that are so popular.
Study the styles before is ahuge help.
It's so helpful.
And then I walk in and trythese A-line dresses and I was
like this is the ugliest shit.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I've ever seen on me.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
You have to put it on your body, yeah, and it just
didn't look right, yeah, andeveryone, even the guy, was like
it's not fitting you, why areyou hiding?
I'm like, I'm not hidinganything like I feel like I'm
not this like voluptuous girly,um, and turns out those tighter
fitting dresses just looked alittle bit I am so dead, so
opposite of me.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Rachel, tell us about because you so you also have to
give us.
You have the beauty of being inNew York and I feel like I went
deep down the rabbit hole oftrying to understand bridal
fashion week.
You just went, invited to amillion events, so I need you to
tell us your dress situation,but also give the girls what
they need to know about New Yorkfashion week.
Bridal fashion week You've beentwice too.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
I've been twice.
Yeah, I've been twice.
I mean two or three times.
So the first time I'll startbridal fashion week, the first
time I ever got invited, I waslike what?
Like I got an email to like anevent and I was like what is
this Like?
Is it made up?
I had no idea.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
Yeah, it sounds fake, I literally had no idea.
Speaker 4 (28:03):
Sounds fake.
It's totally real.
It's basically a fashion weekfor and it's when all of the
designers kind of drop theirlatest collections and then you
know like they go, they havetheir trunk shows and things
like that afterwards, but it'slike they premiere them during
this bridal fashion week.
So this time was I feel likewhen I've gone in the past let's
(28:25):
back up a little I was justlike oh, they're pretty,
whatever.
Like I wasn't the girly whoknew all the designers.
Yeah, nothing, which is likethe most not me thing ever I
know.
Like I didn't know one weddingdress designer, obviously.
No, that was now honestly same.
I knew nothing which is likethe most not me thing ever.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
I know, like I didn't know one wedding dress designer
.
Speaker 4 (28:42):
No that was me.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Honestly same yeah.
Speaker 4 (28:44):
I can tell you every single fucking one, but I had no
idea about any of it.
Like even like months after Iwas engaged I had a friend
texting me who's also engaged,Like you need to go to this
designer, this designer, thisdesigner I was like great, but
who are they?
Like I didn't know a thing.
So going in the past to bridalfashion week fun, pretty dresses
, Wahoo I was like great, We'llpost some pictures.
(29:06):
But this time it was reallyinteresting going because I was
in the midst of wedding dressshopping at the same time, so it
overlapped very nicely and veryunintentionally.
So I was previewing these otherdresses and some of the events.
I was trying on dresses, whichwas really interesting because
it was like me alone, not withmy mom.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
Isn't it the weirdest experience?
Speaker 4 (29:30):
And they're like clamping you and you're like who
am I going to show?
Oh, I was showing a random girlwho I met at the event and at
the next one, two girls who workin PR who invited me.
It was just me and them at theappointment and I was like
you're my mom yeah, and they'llbe the realist.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
They'll be like love it, Don't oh exactly.
Speaker 4 (29:57):
It was wild because it was like I literally was just
coming off of wedding dressshopping.
So that was interesting.
So I would say going to it whenI was dress shopping was really
great because it made me kindof solidify that I was going to
go back and buy my dress, that Idid.
Seeing what was coming out andbeing like, oh, I don't like any
of that, that's not for me.
Yes, so I don't know.
It's really interesting, and soif you're listening and you are
(30:18):
wedding dress shopping and ithappens to be around final
fashion week, stay on everyone'sstories, see what's coming up,
cause then you could go to atrick show and buy it and all
that fun stuff.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Literally me to Rachel.
When I see her at these events,I like message her, I'm like
did you see this certaindesigner?
And she's like, yeah, wasn't it?
And then, sure enough, theycome out and I'm like she was
right, it ain't it, yeah, ain'tit?
Not it.
Oh, did you end up trying?
So okay, then we have to hearyour yes moment.
So I've.
Recently there was one from.
So Bridal Fashion Week has twodrops Just for let me save you
(30:52):
the headache of trying to figurethis out from Google.
Oh my God, give me the tea.
Brando, fashion Week has twodrops One that's supposed to be
spring summer of the coming yearand then fall winter of like
the coming year, so it would-.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
It makes no sense.
It makes no fucking sense.
It's so hard to conceptualizeit.
But then Right, if it doesn'tdrop until next year, you can
still buy it now.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Now, but it won't be until you have your dress the
next year.
It's so confusing.
Speaker 4 (31:16):
It's so mind-blowing.
Whoever came up with it, Idon't understand.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Horrible idea.
Just call them like the newest.
Like can we just put the date?
Speaker 4 (31:24):
The latest drop will come this date, right so because
I've had this long engagement.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
I tried on wedding dresses kind of early.
I started around Thanksgiving.
My parents were my mom, mostimportantly, not my dad was
heading on a two month worldcruise, so she wasn't going to
be here for a while.
So I was like we got to knocksome of this out of the way in
case like you know you're nothere.
You got to buy it, right, I'mnot going to go the first time
without my mom to try on weddingdresses, so I started early and
then the first drop that wasnew had already come out and I
(31:52):
was looking at the newestdresses and there was a dress I
really liked from a.
It was a Berta dress, I'll justsay it.
Speaker 3 (31:57):
I was going to say can I say it?
Yeah, you can.
Berta was me before Kim Casas.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
Like Berta was, I was going to fly to New York to
their flagship store.
I was going to fly to New.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
York.
No, I was a Berta, that was.
I wish I could have brought youwith me.
That was literally the onlybrand, like the only wedding
dress brand that I was like ohmy God, designer that I really
that I really, really.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
That was the one that online I'm like this is it?
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yeah, this is the moment, and then I completely
changed.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
So I tried on this bird address that I do, I can't
say I don't not love and doesn'trun rent free a little bit in
my brain.
And then I was like, well, I'mnot need, I don't need to commit
to one more round comes out, solike I'm just gonna wait to see
what they come out.
I love you, bird up.
But then I'm texting Rachel andI'm like, how's the new line?
And it came out and I was justlike, well, it's that other one
(32:47):
from the other one, because thisone ain't giving me what I need
.
The newest drop, um, so fair,okay, but I want to go back I
can't believe you got to try iton, though.
No, I didn't try it on, I justdeeply went through every
influencer, I know checking tosee if they're just and like I'm
down to the wedding contentcreators that I think have a
similar body type to me, likeI'm creepy.
Speaker 4 (33:09):
I'm creepy as fuck, no it's not creepy at all.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I feel like, well, what else is it there for?
Like social media, there me tostock everything, no like.
But literally I use it as likeit's my google.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Just let me see videos instead of googling it,
and then it's like you know, afreaking couldn't have said it
better yeah, like clip arts,thing of right I want to hear
did you be brutally honest aboutI will you're saying yes to the
dress moment?
Was it like?
Because it seems like yours waslike the TV show.
Speaker 4 (33:38):
Mine was, mine was different, mine was very good,
we love that Like negative.
First of all, no one offered mechampagne ever in all of my
wedding dress.
Trying on some of the placeshere.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
You have to bring your own.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Oh really.
But the thing is with that.
I don't like champagne, I don'tlike drinks with bubbles, it's
just the thought.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
You were like I wasn't going to drink it, but
where is it Tips?
But you should have offered it.
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 4 (34:08):
I guess you have to ask.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, you have to ask .
A lot of places only have itfor your say yes moment.
But if you ask, they'll usuallycough it up Not me being the
alcoholics with the alcoholicgroup.
Wait, now that I know you haveit and I know other stores like
Jackson James, as well asLovella in LA you can bring your
own champagne Not that I didthat, you know.
And if you did.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
who cares?
Wait, I just okay.
So I went to one.
I'm so sorry to interrupt you,but the first one I went to they
didn't.
No, yeah, they didn't offer,but it was kind of like a Galia
Lahav did right at the top.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Okay, they were like we know our shit's expensive.
Speaker 4 (34:42):
Yeah, injured Jackson James had the whole.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Jackson.
James did the whole thing forsure, they were fine, but I
would say food was offeredbecause it was an event, so I
did do a try on there.
At the event there waschampagne, but I don't count
that Totally.
Yeah, no, I wouldn't count iteither, because that one was on
accident.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
But yeah, no, I didn't get it on the first one.
You want the?
Speaker 2 (35:01):
traditional moment, wait, that sucks, you're so
right.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
It's the thought that counts.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
I will send you champagne.
Speaker 4 (35:07):
Thank you, I would have pretended to drink.
Just for the photo, the contentyeah that Content, yeah, that
you can't even post becauseyou're in the dress no,
literally, yeah, wedding dressshopping.
So I feel like I took a reallystrategic approach because,
again, I knew nothing going intothis and then I learned so much
(35:33):
.
So I'm from outside of Phillyand I wanted to go with my
mother-in-law and my mom, so wewent there.
First, there's two stores thatpeople told us to go to and I
was like I probably won't buy mydress at one of these.
I need to go to a place thathas a lot of styles, options,
designers and see what I like onmy body Without giving so much
(35:54):
away.
I obviously I want to be aprincess and be in a ball gown,
but I'm five foot.
That's so not realistic.
So I was like I need to go getthat out of my system.
Literally I probably will go insomething tighter, because I'm
literally so short, I'm 5'1".
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Okay, so we're on the same age here.
Oh, so I'm the tall queen ofthe room.
Okay, no, here's a tall one.
No, this is making so muchsense and you don't even think
about it.
You go in and try on thesegowns and it's like made for a
seven foot, like model.
Speaker 4 (36:23):
It's for a model.
I know my mom was thinking.
I'm a model, and my mom wastrying to break it to me.
She's like you're five foot,Like you're standing on the
pedestal.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
You're really not that tall.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
You're both cute.
My parents are out theregassing me up.
You look like a model.
I fucking don't.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
But I actually found a dress at my first appointment
I believe it was the first one Itried on and we really liked it
.
Like we left thinking that wasthe one.
It wasn't Spo spoiler alert itwas like a tight fitted dress we
were going to switch.
We were going to do so manythings to switch it.
We were going to switch thelace add, like this skirt
(37:07):
situation.
But we were like, oh, like ourstylist, like kind of what we
were going back to, to what wewere saying earlier.
She knew what she was doing.
She heard me.
She was like put this, put thisand do this.
She was great.
And then I went to anotherappointment the same day, hated
everything.
We were like, oh, we like thatother dress so, and the stylist
wasn't that good.
So I really think the stylistcan really make or break the
(37:29):
experience.
I totally agree.
And then, and then I had aMonique Lillier dress on my
Pinterest board for like.
Since I started looking and Iwas like I I have to go try it
on before I commit to adifferent dress, and I'm also
going to go to Mark Ingram,which is another bridal store
here, where they carry a bunchof different designers that I
(37:51):
was interested in here in NewYork.
Totally recommend going there.
Um went to.
Monique hated the dress on me.
It was beautiful.
I just was too short.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Yeah, and it breaks your heart.
I was just so short.
Speaker 4 (38:02):
No I like went in I told the stylist, I was like I
want that dress and he's, andthen I put on and I was like
yeah, and he was like do youwant to try on anything else?
I was like not really.
No, I was like I came for thisreason.
I'm devastated, but that's okay.
It's good to see things youdon't like.
So still thought I was gettingthe other dress next day.
Rolls around, my mom's stillhere.
(38:23):
I actually thought people weredming me go to burda, go to
burda, go to burda.
I got so many dms go to burdaso I was like mom, let's go to
burda.
Um made an appointmentliterally 30 minutes before.
Uh had so much fun trying ondresses there.
I will say, since you haven'ttried it on yet, the one thing
that I found like physically,literally uncomfortable.
(38:44):
They have a bodysuit in all oftheir dresses.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
There's tight ones.
Have bodysuits?
Yeah, I didn't know that.
Yeah, which is?
Speaker 4 (38:51):
really it's smart, it's interesting.
But when I was trying them on Iwas like I feel suffocated,
like it was really interesting.
So I didn't find the one there,but I had lots of fun trying on
their most expensive dresses.
I tried on the dress thatBerta's daughter wore she made
for her.
I know I was like wow, look atme.
(39:12):
And then I went to Mark Ingramthat day, readied by the other
dress, and I had another reallygreat stylist.
I told her what I liked.
She pulls these dresses.
She pulls one.
I was like I like that.
Um, I was like it might be toomuch for you.
We put it on and we were bothlike whoa.
And we were like this is the onethat he was, just like it felt
(39:34):
so special, like you felt likeit was the one.
Um so yeah, did you cry.
That was really exciting, so Idon't cry ever.
It's a really weird thing, solike got engaged, didn't cry,
but I was like I felt emotionalbut I didn't cry, and we were
(39:57):
also getting rushed out of theappointment at the same time.
Like our time was up and we'relike, can we put it on again?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
so but you might be about to buy it so like, let her
exactly.
Speaker 4 (40:08):
I know.
So she did.
Shelly was great.
We love shelly.
Um, talked to her this morning.
So then we were like, oh, thisis the dress.
And then slapped on it and thenI had to wait for my mom to
come back to new york because Iwanted her to be there.
Like they measure every singlepart of your body, something I
didn't know going into- thisliterally, dress is made for you
(40:28):
.
Yes, exactly, um, I was going tosay.
Funny enough, it ended up beinga dress that I had saved on my
Pinterest board as well, that Ididn't even remember.
I was looking back and I waslike, oh my God, that's my dress
.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
I was like, oh, it was meant to be so that actually
happened to me too, and it's itwasn't subconscious, yeah and
okay.
So I don't want to be like thatcrazy.
It wasn't too.
It wasn't the exact photo, butthe style that I was looking for
, that I kept catching myselfpinning.
I was like pinning certainwedding dresses that I thought I
(41:04):
wanted, which was like veryA-line, not quite ball gown but
not quite mermaid, just likeA-line loose, whatever.
And I was like also pinning acertain style that I felt like
was also kind of part of me, andthen that aesthetic came to
fruition in my dress because Iwas like, whoa, this was not
what I am.
Speaker 4 (41:23):
It's so funny how that happened.
It's so funny, start pinning.
Speaker 2 (41:26):
Start pinning.
Well, the funniest part is like.
I've tried on a million dresses, I've had a lot of time,
whatnot, and I thought I wasgoing to, for sure, be a fitted
girly.
That's what's in the Pinterestboard.
Really Definitely a ball gownA-line girly.
Definitely a ball gown A-linegirly, isn't it crazy, you just
flip.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
You just flip it.
You never know, you never know,you don't know until you put a
dress on your body.
Speaker 4 (41:47):
You don't know.
You can't judge it until it'son you.
Speaker 3 (41:49):
Literally and try literally.
Anyone listening, Everyonelistening.
Speaker 4 (41:53):
Everyone, everyone.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
Go, try as many freaking dresses as you can, all
the styles, oh, I agree.
Literally the widest range youcan think of the fun ones that
you're like so-and-so's daughterwore.
I had one.
I tried on the one that everyinfluencer in LA-.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
Is it the?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
Gali Elhav white lace one.
Speaker 2 (42:11):
It's the Kim Kisos ball gown one, the Kim Kisos
ball with the white bead.
Speaker 4 (42:15):
With the white bead yeah, literally.
Speaker 3 (42:16):
That one.
Speaker 4 (42:17):
I know exactly what you're talking about.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
You have to try it on .
You got to get it out of yourstomach, oh my God.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
And it was stunning.
Speaker 3 (42:23):
I was literally like I cannot believe I'm wearing
this on, but like that wholeLike have fun, have fun and do
it, but also have so much gracewith yourself, because although
my finding mine was like sofairytale-like and so beautiful
because of my stylist only, Iwould say the process before
that was like terrible.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Yeah, I cried after the first day of trying on
dresses, because I was just likeso tired it's overwhelming,
yeah.
And I was like kind of concernedabout like the committee making
sure the committee was happyand like I could still come to
realization.
And I'm not going to lie, Ihaven't said yes to the dress
yet, so like I could bebullshitting right now, but like
I don't think I'm going to cry.
I haven't said yes to the dressyet, so like I could be
(43:03):
bullshitting right now, but likeI don't think I'm going to cry
Like I literally think I'm justgoing to be like okay, I'm at
peace Like it's this one, notlike the big dramatic moment and
I'm dramatic girly.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
I think I cried on the second time because I was
like it's done, Like it's a taskcompleted yes, it was beautiful
, that's what my mom said.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
A task completed yes, it was beautiful.
That's what my mom said.
Yeah, I think I was relieved.
She literally said thank Godit's done.
Yeah, it was the anxiety.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Absolutely.
I think that's what it was.
Obviously, I did love it, but Ihaven't cried for anything else
and it also wasn't this crazydramatic cry.
It was a little teary-eyedbecause everyone's staring at
you telling you how beautifulyou are.
So I was like that is reallykind Like wow, it's going to
happen at your wedding too.
I know I was like, oh God, whatam I going to do?
(43:47):
Got to get prepared, startpracticing, give yourself grace.
Give yourself so much grace and, like any standard you have for
yourself, just kind of try tothrow it out the window and just
accept your body in the moment,because I was really struggling
.
The first video I put onInstagram where it's like come
with me to try on dresses andlike I don't know, it's a reel I
made, I don't even know why.
I posted it because I hate thatvideo so much and it did so
(44:10):
well-ish, because we all want tosee dresses.
Speaker 1 (44:12):
Oh my God, yeah, everyone wants to see the
dresses and people are like ohmy God, stephanie.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
I was like, guys, this was the worst day of my
life and I'm posting it becauseI tried on fun dresses and I
want to share them.
But there was one dress therethat is still my Roman Empire.
Speaker 1 (44:24):
Yeah, it's in my head rent free, but yeah, it happens
.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Because if you're short and not, tall like this
girl.
You're short Not everyone's anextra, extra, extra small.
It is what it is, yeah.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
Okay, I was going to say no dresses fit in any way
shape.
They're all like they're, soeither so big, so small, it's
like the craziest sizing thatthey have.
It just makes no sense.
Um, but I will say I don't knowif you guys did this.
Going to more than one place totry on dresses in one day is so
much.
It is so exhausting, sooverwhelming.
(45:02):
It's like the headache you getfrom going to the mall times a
thousand.
You're drained.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
Yeah, two a day is an absolute max.
Three, you're actually crazyyeah.
Speaker 4 (45:12):
No, I agree.
No Three, you're out of yourmind.
Mental capacity One you'retired.
Speaker 2 (45:17):
See, I can handle two , but I'm nuts.
We did oh, I was losing my mind.
See, I can handle two, but likeI'm nuts, like we did, oh, I
was losing my mind, I can.
The first day we did one andthen two, and then the third day
we ended with just one and Iwas like oh, like that was a lot
.
But I could have done a secondin that day, but no way should
anybody ever do three in a day,in my opinion.
Speaker 3 (45:36):
No, no, no, no.
I don't think you give yourselfenough time to sit in it either
you give yourself enough timeto sit in it?
Speaker 2 (45:44):
No, not at all.
Okay.
That being said, I want toshift into wedding planning like
a little bit.
Who do you not share youropinions about your wedding?
Speaker 1 (45:52):
Thank you so much for listening to Confessions of a
Wannabe it Girl.
Don't forget to rate andsubscribe to the show.
As always, we'll see you nextTuesday.
Welcome to Confessions of a Wannabe it Girl
.
I'm your host, marley Fregging,and I'm here to help you filter
out all the bullshit and becomethe next it Girl.
This podcast explores thereality of what it really takes
to make it out there.
As it turns out, it is way lessInstagrammable than I thought
it was going to be.
I'm still very much a work inprogress, but there's simply
(00:27):
nothing else I'd rather be doingthan chasing my dreams.
So let's learn from my mistakesand work together to achieve
our dreams with more confidence,clarity and direction.
Let's get after it All right.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Well, guys, welcome to what are we calling this?
The bridal round table, thebridal era?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I don't know Our wedding episode.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that'scute, that's cute.
All the things, all the things.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
There's just so much, too many things.
Okay, so I'm joined by Rachel,or, as you might know, her just
because it's pretty, andStephanie Cardenas how are you
guys?
Thank you guys so much forbeing here.
Thank you, we're excited.
I am so excited to start withall things.
(01:11):
Wedding you know, there's notas much.
I mean, maybe there is.
I just didn't really like thepodcast resources I found
regarding a wedding information,so I'm very excited to dive
into it.
We are all three engaged.
I've known you both not beingengaged, both second time.
Podcast.
Returning guests yes, look atus.
I know I'm so excited, so let'sstart with when you got engaged
(01:33):
and when is your wedding.
Steph, do you want to go first?
Cool Me, I'm like Rachel, okay.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
So when I got engaged and when is my wedding?
Yes, okay, I got engaged.
So, when I got engaged and whenis my wedding?
Yes, okay, I got engaged Me.
I got engaged September 7th2022 in Paris, france, with my
fiance, obviously.
Who else would it be?
So, yeah, that happened aboutit's 2024.
(02:00):
Like two years ago, which is,or a year and a half going to be
, but, yeah, best experienceever, and then I will be getting
married July 13th at 2024.
So, like two and a half months.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Oh fuck so like tomorrow literally tomorrow
actually.
I'm late to my wedding.
She needs to be in hair andmakeup.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
No, actually, yeah, so oh my gosh, it comes by so
fast.
And then Rachel actually yeah.
So, oh, my gosh, it comes by sofast.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
And then, rachel, when did you get engaged?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
I got engaged last May in Florence, italy.
Look at us abroad, girls.
We were on a trip after hismedical school graduation and
Florence is my favorite place,so he proposed there.
It was lovely.
More than lovely.
I wish I knew the exact date,but I don't, so we won't tell
anyone.
More than lovely.
I wish I knew the exact date,but I don't, so we won't tell
anyone.
And then I'm getting marriednext April, so April 4th 2025.
So it's a long engagement too.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Yeah, I'm going to double down on the long
engagement as well.
I mean, I did a whole podcastepisode about it, so we're not
going to go deep into my storyhere at all, but I got engaged
July 8th 2023, and we will begetting married May 17th 2025.
Yep, yes, okay, love it, loveit.
So we all chose longengagements.
Why?
Speaker 1 (03:16):
did you choose?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
long engagement stuff .
Speaker 3 (03:19):
So for me one when we got engaged abroad too, it was
it was just a trip we were goingon and like we have been
together for so long.
So when it happened, it wasmore of like the anticipation of
engagement.
And when, yeah, the day came,you don't know what you're going
to feel.
I mean obviously excitement andstuff.
But I was just so on cloud nine, like it was almost so euphoric
(03:42):
that I was like I want to livein this bubble and it was the
best.
Because when I got engaged Iwas actually by myself and my
whole life.
I thought I was going to havelike family there and stuff.
But I was so happy in that twoweek bubble I didn't even post
my engagement till like twoweeks later.
I was literally going to bringthat up.
I was literally.
I was like happy, and so Ireally enjoyed that part of it
and I really just wanted to beengaged.
(04:03):
I feel like a lot of peoplekind of like rush into it, and I
come from a family that doesn'tdo all this traditional wedding
stuff.
My fiance's family is very like.
I think when we got engaged,the first thing they asked was
like when's the date?
And I was like he just asked me, you know, and so I wasn't even
thinking about it.
So I really took my time andfor me it just felt better to
(04:23):
kind of I don't know, just like,take your time with it.
Yeah, milk it, like this is theonly time we'll ever get to do
all this fun stuff.
So milk it.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
No, I totally agree with that.
It was in the acting classLiterally yeah.
Be in the bridal.
I was in the acting class and,like I was talking, I just met
this guy new acting class and Iwas like no, enjoy it.
He'd just been married.
He was like enjoy it, it's theshortest period in your
relationship.
I was like that's interesting.
That is so true.
Unless I mean you met one monthand got married a month too,
(04:56):
then that's not true.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
But for everyone else that applies, then we need to
be having a differentconversation.
Yeah, yeah, it's so different.
We're all worried aboutdifferent things.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
But like it's so funny you say long engagement
because honestly, like whatwe're all around like a two year
mark where we I feel likethat's not even long I feel like
that's like girl.
Realistically that's how longpeople should take, because the
process one is like a lot andyou just have to be on the same
page, so it's really not thatlong.
Like I feel like longengagement is like pushing the
light if you're like five years,yeah, yeah.
(05:22):
I feel like we're like normaland I have a friend who is still
on her.
She's going on her 12th year ofengagement, yeah, and when I
met her she was engaged andshe's still engaged and I was
like, oh, y'all are just vibing.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
You're vibing with it , Rachel.
Why did you?
Speaker 4 (05:40):
choose the long engagement.
That's a great well, it'sactually pretty simple.
So my brother got engaged a fewweeks before me.
He's 30.
So he's five years older thanme and he's getting married next
weekend.
So his date I know.
So his date was already set andpart of it was like we cannot
be planning two weddings at once.
(06:00):
That is, that's so much.
My poor mother, she does notneed to do that.
And the other part of it I hada few friends who were getting
married in the fall.
So then when we were looking atdates I didn't want it to be
too much for my friends.
I was very much thinking ofeveryone else when picking a
date.
I have a friend group of 13from college.
That's a lot.
(06:21):
To go to three weddings inthree months, that's ridiculous.
Then I wanted good weather.
I can't speak, not like youguys.
It's so great to get marriedhere.
I'm in New York everyoneJanuary February.
It's a little dreary, it's notreally beautiful.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
It's kind of the same here, though it's been worse
recently.
Us complaining about 60s.
We're in Canadian.
Same here, though it's beenrecently it's been worse, yeah,
us complaining about.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
No, I know in like a what's that was canadian goose
sweaters like yeah sweater,jacket what are those called?
Speaker 3 (06:52):
I hear you, I hear you.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
What's a fucking jacket canada, goose, canada
there we go.
So that I would say half of itwas that and the other half is
that I am such a meticulousplanner like I wanted to be able
to focus on one thing at a timeand do it like really right.
Like I've been dreaming aboutthis my whole life, haven't we
all?
And so like, for example,bridesmaid proposal like I
(07:14):
didn't want to have to like rushsomething like that.
Like I want to be able to focuson that, and then the shower,
and then the bachelorette, likethere's so many things you have
to plan.
So I was like let's spread itout, I don't need to rush into
any of this.
We're young, we're happy, Iwant to be engaged for a while,
like let's get married when wewant to get married on our own
time, type of thing, and also togive me time to plan everything
(07:37):
very meticulously and not bestressed.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
I feel very similar to that, except for you're like
nice and you're being consciousof all your friends, which I
would like to say is myreasoning for doing it too.
But honestly, I like, justdon't want to share.
The attention is the truth.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I love that for you.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
I love that for you.
Thank you, you shouldn't.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Thank you, no, totally.
So you know, speaking ofbridesmaids, seeing it kind of
got brought up, I feel like it'skind of people are like a
little in or all out onbridesmaids these days, yeah,
Like are you?
Having bridesmaids.
I know you're havingbridesmaids and I'm really
curious to dive into yourSomething Blue as well.
Oh, we'll talk.
Rachel, kick us off.
Tell us about your bridesmaids.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
Okay, so for a second , I was not going to have
bridesmaids.
I have.
I feel very fortunate.
I have a lot of really closefriends.
I have college friends, homefriends, camp friends.
I have a lot of cousins.
I sadly don't have any sisters,but I will have three soon to
be sisters through marriage andmy brothers.
(08:41):
So there are so many people inmy life and I was like how am I
supposed to have a normal amountLike so wild to me.
So then I was like no, like Iwant people around me wearing
pink.
I was like I don't want to getready alone.
That sounds sad.
Like so lots of thought.
I had went through differentways of how I could have
(09:03):
different people in my life, bea part of it and not just be
bridesmaids.
I mean, realistically, we allknow it being a bridesmaid is
such a fake title.
I mean it's so sweet, but likeyou're literally just wearing a
colored dress, like there's notmuch more to it.
Um, and you know, I was reallystressed about the whole
bridesmaid thing for sure,because I just couldn't choose
(09:27):
certain people versus not.
And I'm still having troublewith it, even though I asked my
bridesmaids already.
I totally still feel guiltythat I couldn't include all of
my friends bridesmaids.
(09:49):
I think it is half of itsfamily, um, no cousins.
And so I had to think of otherways to incorporate other
friends, because I was like Ican't do this and a lot of them
are like set numbers of peopleas well, and so I would never
just have like one or two likeright, you can tell I'm feeling
really guilty.
So I had some of my collegefriends, some home friends and
abroad friends, whateverbridesmaids we can talk about
the whole proposal thing later.
(10:10):
But I did that.
And then my camp friends.
I grew up with them, I've knownthem since I was seven, eight.
They're such important peopleto me and I wanted to honor them
in a different way.
So our camp colors were blueand gold and I was like like how
cute would it be if I askedthem to be my something blue, so
they're kind of wear blue tothe wedding.
(10:30):
I did a whole little thing forthem too.
They're obviously coming on thebachelorette, all that fun
stuff, so it's like anunofficial bridesmaid basically.
Uh, and I thought it was justanother fun way to kind of have
them involved, have themincorporated in like a special
part of the day and then I don'tneed to think of like I don't
(10:51):
know I need, I don't need towear blue shoes or something.
So that's what I did for themand I also think it's a really
good idea if someone doesn'twant to have bridesmaids, like a
fun way to incorporate yourfriends without being like it's
so official.
It's like a fun way toincorporate your friends without
being like it's so official,and then I don't think I even
posted about this.
But I'm having my cousin.
I know I'm having my cousins.
(11:13):
There's literally so manypeople and I'm like I can't, I
don't know what to do.
So I'm having my cousins usherthe ceremony, like another way
to honor different people, andthey're going to wear a hot pink
too.
So more pink.
Everyone's going to be happy.
So I know who would havethought sorry everyone, you have
(11:34):
to wear a pink, Um.
so I came up with a lot ofunique ideas to incorporate
everyone, but still stressedabout the bridesmaid thing, even
though it's done.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
No, totally.
How did you feel about thebridesmaids?
How many bridesmaids do youhave?
Speaker 3 (11:48):
I don't have a single bridesmaid, you just have the
maid of honor.
I just have a maid of honor.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yes, we're getting the flip.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Wow.
No, wait but same likeLiterally the opposite, because
I'm not having a maid of honor.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Yeah, Like so I'm doing the well, we're kind of
doing the same thing.
Like I was just so stressedabout all these people in my
life.
I moved a lot growing up and soI have so many important people
from just different areas of mylife.
I also have, like my fiance'sfamily, Like my.
I have two brothers also do nothave two sisters, Like okay.
I do have two sisters but theyare not like we didn't grow up
together.
So, yeah, it wasn't like this,like, oh, I have two sisters to
(12:29):
help me, one's like super little, and then the eldest one she's
40.
And so I'm like there's justlike a big disconnect.
So I was like, okay, I onlyhave two brothers like in my
immediate family and I was justlike they both have long-term
relationships too, too, that I'mclose to, and so many things.
So I was just like I'm notgoing to do it and I'm just
going to like have differentroles in my wedding where people
(12:52):
will feel special and like apart of it.
And then the Bachelorette waslike it's a big one, I'm going
in two weeks.
Where are you going?
I'm going to Cartagena,colombia.
That's where my family's fromColombia.
So I just thought of doing iton the coast over there Felt
like very special to me.
My cousin and some of myfriends are also from there.
So it was like perfect and Iwanted people to kind of get a
(13:14):
taste of who I was.
So, yeah, I just I didn't wantto stress about the dresses,
like you said, it really is justa title and I have nothing
against, like you know,bridesmaids at all.
It wasn't this like vendetta,because I feel like on TikTok
you get.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
People are angry.
Yeah, people are angry.
Bridesmaids like I love them.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
I love that.
We could just be like oh my god, love that for you.
Here's why I did it, but alsolove that for you, and this is
why I did like it's just a combo, yeah, um, yeah.
I was not like I know somepeople uh couldn't do all of
that.
I'm having a wedding here in LA.
Me and my fiance are the onlyones here, so to have
bridesmaids for me and to havethis like job role on these
(13:54):
friends who are already flyinghere for my wedding, I just
thought it was going to be toomuch because they would have to
do all this other stuff on topof buying an outfit, on top of
buying.
I was just like no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Everyone's in.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Texas, and let's just who can come to the
bachelorette can come.
It does not mean you're abridesmaid or not, you are just
like my best friend, and so itjust helped so much, cause I
actually had a lot of friendswho were like I can't make it if
I want to go to your wedding.
You know, I don't know.
There's like so many thingsthat come into play.
So same thing I was trying tobe very conscious about, like my
(14:29):
friend situations and there'sother weddings, people know
other people.
I was like you're alreadycoming to LA.
I just care about you coming toLA, so don't worry about this
whole bridesmaid title.
If you can make it to thebachelorette, come to the
bachelorette.
And I'm so happy.
It all turned out perfect andI'm going to party with my BFFs
and I'm so excited.
We love that, we love that.
Speaker 4 (14:47):
So how many people are going on the bachelorette?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Yeah, Because I'm so- .
Speaker 4 (14:50):
Doing basically the same thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
Okay, cool.
So it's 10 of us, but I hadoriginally invited quite a few.
Like I had my little collegegroup, but I have a high school
group I've stayed really closeto.
I have my childhood bestfriends and then cousins.
Also, I'm Latina, I come from abig family, so I had cousins
and stuff, but it all worked outand so, yeah, it turned out to
be 10 of us and so one of mybest friends is Charlie.
(15:13):
He's coming on the trip, buthe's also my officiant.
Speaker 4 (15:15):
So it's like everyone .
Speaker 3 (15:16):
yeah, has like I love that.
Yeah, they're double role.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
My cousin's my maid of honor, so she's the only one
I asked cutest proposal ever,like, like I said I'm the first.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Oh my god, it's all on her instagram.
I was like, wait, I have to go.
Look, you have to.
It was the most intimate, chillthing.
But like I thought it was justso precious.
Um, I like I said, don't tellus.
I made like a little customizedbox for her, super simple, but
it was like all really cutie.
I got her name engraved on likea ysl lipstick.
Her favorite like lip color isa red lip, so got her a classic
YSL, got her name on it.
I did like Jo Malone scentedcandles like a makeup bag.
(15:53):
Yeah, I kind of went for a moredesigner feel because she
really likes designer items andshe's just one girl, so I was
like I can spoil you.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I didn't have to pay for like 10 other people.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
Yeah, I know Jealous Respectfully.
But like love you guys.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
But it was nice to do it for one person, oh, yeah,
well, so this will take me rightinto my next question.
I'll tell you I haven't askedmine yet.
Yeah, nope, we have time.
We have time.
Well, that's, I'm curious.
Yeah, actually think I'm thebasic bitch in this like
situation.
I'm doing it very traditional,like I will have a maid of honor
(16:26):
and I will have bridesmaids, um, and no one's about to be
surprised, like everyone knows.
So, but when did you guys yeah,whatever.
When did you guys ask them Likehow far out did you feel like
this is comfy?
Speaker 3 (16:38):
for me, I know yours will probably, cause she has
more bridesmaids just for for mymaid of honor.
They all live out of town, likeI said.
So in September I had booked mywedding dress appointment and I
live here alone.
So I was like, oh my God, mymom needs to come, my grandma
needs to come.
So my cousin, who is now mymaid of honor, came with her mom
.
So anyway, we went to go try ondresses.
(17:00):
So I took them to do the wholeexperience and since she was
already in town from Florida, Ijust decided to ask her there.
So that was in September andI'm getting married in July.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
I can't math.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
I don't know.
So six something around morethan six months before.
I mean, I feel like I also tookmy time, though, because it was
just one girl and like we hadalready been kind of like I've
been hinting it for a time, butI was literally like you don't
have to do anything besides planthe Columbia trip, because
she's born and raised inColumbia.
So I was like you can that isyour one job and it was perfect,
(17:34):
cause I've been chilling guys.
It just had to have been like oh, venmo, okay, yeah, and I'll
just send you Venmo.
I'm so jealous.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I know.
So, rachel, flip side for you.
When did you decide?
Because you'd been engaged forabout a year-ish, and then you
asked.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah, and how many months was it away from the
wedding?
I I asked.
I believe it was February orend of January, so it definitely
was a good amount of timebefore.
Honestly, it just kind of feltlike the next natural thing that
I needed to do in terms ofwedding planning.
And there were some people outof town actually, two of my
(18:08):
bridesmaids live in LA.
They didn't come in.
I was like that's ridiculous.
Do not spend money on a flightto come in for this brunch that
I'm doing.
I'll mail them all to you.
But another friend who happenedto be in town that weekend.
So it all just kind of workedout and, honestly, my mom and
brother were available to helpme set it all up.
So that was really why, and Idon't know, just felt like kind
(18:32):
of the next natural thing, likedid the engagement party did the
venue, and then it was likethat was the next natural thing.
Like did the engagement partydid the venue, and then it was
like that was the next thing.
I don't know how else to say it.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
It just felt right, so I just yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:43):
I think I was ready to commit.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Yeah, I'm almost there.
I'm like, okay.
So once I hit the one year mark, I think I'm going to be like
all right, it's time, but fun,fun, hack.
This is so embarrassing.
I bought some of the gifts togo in the box because I am going
all out in these boxes.
I've had a year to save forthem and whatnot.
I bought some of the stuff onBlack Friday Perfect Genius.
(19:07):
No, literally.
Thank you, genius.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
My engraving.
It was kind of on accident, butwhen I went to go get her stuff
Sephora was doing some at thepro Promotion.
They were doing oh, you can getall.
If you buy a designer item,whatever, you get the free
engravement.
But then I got the YSL makeupbag through that, so like go to
your local Sephora oh, we lovethat and ask and see if they're
doing.
But if you live in LA, go tothe Grove.
Go to the Grove Because theygave me and I like I was like
(19:32):
talking to the girl, I was likethis is for my cousin, she's
going to be my maid of honor,and she went to the back and got
me two more YSL little makeupbags and they were perfect for
the aesthetic.
So like just ask.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
That's the thing Milk the engagement.
That's the beauty of having thetime Milk them in terms of the
gifting, I'm always trying toget free dessert.
Acting like we got engagedyesterday, that's like not real.
I love that we just got engaged.
It's been your anniversary.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
I'm like we're thinking about doing engagement
photo shoots here Like no, I amnot Like shut up, no, but I
think, like you said, a year isperfect, because now that I
asked her in September and yeah,that was a year, right after of
our engagement.
Like I said, I only had onegirl, but, like for you, I feel
like, yeah, you're right on timegirl.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Thanks, flip-flflopping, seeing it kind
of came up a little bit.
Let's talk about dresses.
You've obviously said yes tothe dress.
I don't know if you have.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
I just did.
Last.
Was it last week or two weeksago?
Oh my gosh, I just said yes tothe dress.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Beautiful I'm so excited.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Oh it first.
Okay, fine, yeah, mine'scollecting dust, actually, no, I
haven't even gotten how fuckingridiculous.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Is it that we have to order them so in advance?
It blows my mind.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Yeah, I was like a week off and he was like if you
wait one more week you'll haveto do expedited, and I was like
huh.
I'm like I thought I had plentyof time so I went to well, it
was previously called KingsleyJames.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
I don't know why, I said that Now Jackson James, now
Jackson James.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I just went there last weekend.
Yeah, you know, girl yeah yeah,I got the whole email.
So I went to Jackson James andI got Kim Casas.
Should I say that?
I don't know?
It's up to you.
Yeah, I feel like I can.
I'm excited for you.
Yeah, I don't think anyone elseis like I'm thinking of my
fiance.
He's not going to go.
What's a Kim Casas?
Speaker 2 (21:23):
If he listens to this , God bless him.
So I got a.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
Kim Casas gown and she was like a designer that I
had been obsessed with, like I'mvery much like a Bridgerton.
It's like the theater girlinside of me, I guess.
But I wanted drama, I wanteduniqueness.
I can give you guys a littlesneak peek.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Yeah, I was going to say we'll do some photo.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Yeah, I want to see, I'll give you guys a little
sneak peek.
But I wanted something sodifferent.
So I was actually reallyfatigued going into looking for
dresses because I felt like Iwas looking at the same dress at
all times, which, like I havenothing against.
It's popular for a reason I getit, I respect it but for me
like nothing, felt likeStephanie and so, yeah, I went
(22:04):
with my mom.
My grandma was the first timeever doing that.
My grandma got married likesuper young.
So she you know it was likethose traditional, like Catholic
church, like you got married byShoulders covered.
Yeah, literally.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Exactly like you got married by shoulders.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Yeah, literally Exactly, and like she's a, she's
also she was a head tailor atDillard's for so many years.
She designed like wedding gownsas well.
Oh fuck, she's picking these up.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Yeah, she's like four , nine, and she was literally
like in Columbia I used to makethese gowns, so like something
better.
Wow, me and I would.
I was like okay, okay, okay, um.
So my mom was like lovedanything and everything.
She never got married, myparents never got married, so my
mom was like on cloud nine.
I wanted to give her thatexperience.
And they both, like all threeof us kind of I have the video
(22:46):
and we all like went towards theKim Casas section anyway,
before I even told them about it, and we all like hovered and we
all kind of like picked thesetwo gowns that were like one was
the dress I ended up gettingand the other one was the one I
went in for, and they were likeout of these, like the whole
store, these two, and so we wereall kind of already on the same
page.
Synergy yeah, that's great,though I had an amazing guy help
(23:11):
me.
He, oh, my God, I believe it'sCorey.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
I think that's the most important part, your
stylist.
Speaker 3 (23:17):
Yes.
My stylist Makes or breaks theexperience he was literally the
only man there and at first Igot a little nervous cause I was
like, oh my God, I got the onlyman, like okay, I hope it works
out Like not that that's aproblem.
But I was just like yeah, youjust like you don't know.
And he is literally now named myfairy godmother, like we cried
in.
I'm not even being dramatic.
(23:38):
I know this sounds so dramatic,but I have never had such a
more magical experience in mylife.
He really hooked it up.
He knew I was a content creatortoo, but he also understood
that, like I'm paying for my ownwedding, yeah.
So he like hooked me up with agreat collaboration on this
dress as well.
I've got to.
I've got to with a greatcollaboration on this dress as
well.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
I've got to, I've got to.
Oh wow, Literally that wassmart of you.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Yeah, like dream partnership with Jackson James.
I know they do work with a lotof other girls, but I was
shocked because I I don't feellike I was as big as them.
So I was just like that'llnever happen to me and he just
like, very yeah very god.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
It was amazing.
I got my dream dress, my dreamveil.
He was like here, veil's on meand I was like shut up.
Speaker 3 (24:25):
No, I'm not joking, those are expensive.
Why are they so expensive?
It's literally two.
No one told us about that.
I was literally.
I was going to say a word.
I probably can't say on apodcast, but I was just
speechless.
You could cuss.
No, I was literally.
I was gagged because I wasliterally like what?
But yeah, it was like such abeautiful experience.
I think we got a little tooturnt on champagne with my
grandma and my mom, but he justloved my family.
He actually doesn't work thereanymore, he just left, but I was
(24:46):
like I was his last like client.
It was meant to be and he wentout all out for me.
He was like you're such a, yourfamily, you are just great
vibes.
And so, yeah, my finding mywedding dress and like trying it
on and having it with this guywas like the best experience of
my life, like I was like I'llnever have something so magical.
But every other dress was astruggle, though.
I was like this is a scam didyou have?
Speaker 2 (25:08):
well, did you have the traditional?
Like tears in your eyes um,this is the fucking dress.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
I not the first time.
I tried mine on twice, so Iwent back so that day I knew it
was it.
But he was like can you give ita second?
Speaker 4 (25:22):
And I was like okay, I'll give it a second.
Mad respect to him Honestly.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
I was telling him how detailed I've been with my
wedding.
I'm so intentional.
I haven't been impulsive at all.
Everything I want is for areason, and he could feel that.
And so I ended up going backwith my fiance's family and my
two best friends from here in LA, and there I cried because I
think I let myself, I think thelast few times.
(25:47):
You know you also, you try onso many.
I don't know about y'all, but Itried on so many and sometimes
like you're in a $15,000 gownand I was like I'm not going to
make myself cry Like I wanted tocry, but there's no way that I
can't like it, exactly so Ithink a lot of it was that I was
like there's so many and Ididn't want to get myself to
(26:08):
like it, but my dress was like.
The second time I put it on toshow my fiance's family, I like
cried and everyone in the storewas like you look like the
Virgin Mary and I was likecrying and I was just like
really it was hilarious, I wasdying.
But yeah, I did cry the secondtime, but not the first time.
I had a lot of body dysmorphiagoing on.
(26:30):
Yeah, honest, yeah, I was likeI tried on so many dresses
because I always thought I wasgoing to be an A-line girly, not
me just like hijacking thedress I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
No, we love to Sorry, Rachel, no go, go ahead.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
But I always thought I was going to be an A-line
girly, yeah, and when I wastrying on dresses like ball
gowns, I was like that's alittle too much for me.
Mermaid's not for me.
The straighter dresses, likeyou know, the cool girl dresses
that are so popular.
Study the styles before is ahuge help.
It's so helpful.
And then I walk in and trythese A-line dresses and I was
like this is the ugliest shit.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I've ever seen on me.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
You have to put it on your body, yeah, and it just
didn't look right, yeah, andeveryone, even the guy, was like
it's not fitting you, why areyou hiding?
I'm like, I'm not hidinganything like I feel like I'm
not this like voluptuous girly,um, and turns out those tighter
fitting dresses just looked alittle bit I am so dead, so
opposite of me.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Rachel, tell us about because you so you also have to
give us.
You have the beauty of being inNew York and I feel like I went
deep down the rabbit hole oftrying to understand bridal
fashion week.
You just went, invited to amillion events, so I need you to
tell us your dress situation,but also give the girls what
they need to know about New Yorkfashion week.
Bridal fashion week You've beentwice too.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
I've been twice.
Yeah, I've been twice.
I mean two or three times.
So the first time I'll startbridal fashion week, the first
time I ever got invited, I waslike what?
Like I got an email to like anevent and I was like what is
this Like?
Is it made up?
I had no idea.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
Yeah, it sounds fake, I literally had no idea.
Speaker 4 (28:03):
Sounds fake.
It's totally real.
It's basically a fashion weekfor and it's when all of the
designers kind of drop theirlatest collections and then you
know like they go, they havetheir trunk shows and things
like that afterwards, but it'slike they premiere them during
this bridal fashion week.
So this time was I feel likewhen I've gone in the past let's
(28:25):
back up a little I was justlike oh, they're pretty,
whatever.
Like I wasn't the girly whoknew all the designers.
Yeah, nothing, which is likethe most not me thing ever I
know.
Like I didn't know one weddingdress designer, obviously.
No, that was now honestly same.
I knew nothing which is likethe most not me thing ever.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
I know, like I didn't know one wedding dress designer
.
Speaker 4 (28:42):
No that was me.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Honestly same yeah.
Speaker 4 (28:44):
I can tell you every single fucking one, but I had no
idea about any of it.
Like even like months after Iwas engaged I had a friend
texting me who's also engaged,Like you need to go to this
designer, this designer, thisdesigner I was like great, but
who are they?
Like I didn't know a thing.
So going in the past to bridalfashion week fun, pretty dresses
, Wahoo I was like great, We'llpost some pictures.
(29:06):
But this time it was reallyinteresting going because I was
in the midst of wedding dressshopping at the same time, so it
overlapped very nicely and veryunintentionally.
So I was previewing these otherdresses and some of the events.
I was trying on dresses, whichwas really interesting because
it was like me alone, not withmy mom.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
Isn't it the weirdest experience?
Speaker 4 (29:30):
And they're like clamping you and you're like who
am I going to show?
Oh, I was showing a random girlwho I met at the event and at
the next one, two girls who workin PR who invited me.
It was just me and them at theappointment and I was like
you're my mom yeah, and they'llbe the realist.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
They'll be like love it, Don't oh exactly.
Speaker 4 (29:57):
It was wild because it was like I literally was just
coming off of wedding dressshopping.
So that was interesting.
So I would say going to it whenI was dress shopping was really
great because it made me kindof solidify that I was going to
go back and buy my dress, that Idid.
Seeing what was coming out andbeing like, oh, I don't like any
of that, that's not for me.
Yes, so I don't know.
It's really interesting, and soif you're listening and you are
(30:18):
wedding dress shopping and ithappens to be around final
fashion week, stay on everyone'sstories, see what's coming up,
cause then you could go to atrick show and buy it and all
that fun stuff.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Literally me to Rachel.
When I see her at these events,I like message her, I'm like
did you see this certaindesigner?
And she's like, yeah, wasn't it?
And then, sure enough, theycome out and I'm like she was
right, it ain't it, yeah, ain'tit?
Not it.
Oh, did you end up trying?
So okay, then we have to hearyour yes moment.
So I've.
Recently there was one from.
So Bridal Fashion Week has twodrops Just for let me save you
(30:52):
the headache of trying to figurethis out from Google.
Oh my God, give me the tea.
Brando, fashion Week has twodrops One that's supposed to be
spring summer of the coming yearand then fall winter of like
the coming year, so it would-.
Speaker 4 (31:03):
It makes no sense.
It makes no fucking sense.
It's so hard to conceptualizeit.
But then Right, if it doesn'tdrop until next year, you can
still buy it now.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Now, but it won't be until you have your dress the
next year.
It's so confusing.
Speaker 4 (31:16):
It's so mind-blowing.
Whoever came up with it, Idon't understand.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Horrible idea.
Just call them like the newest.
Like can we just put the date?
Speaker 4 (31:24):
The latest drop will come this date, right so because
I've had this long engagement.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
I tried on wedding dresses kind of early.
I started around Thanksgiving.
My parents were my mom, mostimportantly, not my dad was
heading on a two month worldcruise, so she wasn't going to
be here for a while.
So I was like we got to knocksome of this out of the way in
case like you know you're nothere.
You got to buy it, right, I'mnot going to go the first time
without my mom to try on weddingdresses, so I started early and
then the first drop that wasnew had already come out and I
(31:52):
was looking at the newestdresses and there was a dress I
really liked from a.
It was a Berta dress, I'll justsay it.
Speaker 3 (31:57):
I was going to say can I say it?
Yeah, you can.
Berta was me before Kim Casas.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
Like Berta was, I was going to fly to New York to
their flagship store.
I was going to fly to New.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
York.
No, I was a Berta, that was.
I wish I could have brought youwith me.
That was literally the onlybrand, like the only wedding
dress brand that I was like ohmy God, designer that I really
that I really, really.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
That was the one that online I'm like this is it?
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yeah, this is the moment, and then I completely
changed.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
So I tried on this bird address that I do, I can't
say I don't not love and doesn'trun rent free a little bit in
my brain.
And then I was like, well, I'mnot need, I don't need to commit
to one more round comes out, solike I'm just gonna wait to see
what they come out.
I love you, bird up.
But then I'm texting Rachel andI'm like, how's the new line?
And it came out and I was justlike, well, it's that other one
(32:47):
from the other one, because thisone ain't giving me what I need
.
The newest drop, um, so fair,okay, but I want to go back I
can't believe you got to try iton, though.
No, I didn't try it on, I justdeeply went through every
influencer, I know checking tosee if they're just and like I'm
down to the wedding contentcreators that I think have a
similar body type to me, likeI'm creepy.
Speaker 4 (33:09):
I'm creepy as fuck, no it's not creepy at all.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I feel like, well, what else is it there for?
Like social media, there me tostock everything, no like.
But literally I use it as likeit's my google.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Just let me see videos instead of googling it,
and then it's like you know, afreaking couldn't have said it
better yeah, like clip arts,thing of right I want to hear
did you be brutally honest aboutI will you're saying yes to the
dress moment?
Was it like?
Because it seems like yours waslike the TV show.
Speaker 4 (33:38):
Mine was, mine was different, mine was very good,
we love that Like negative.
First of all, no one offered mechampagne ever in all of my
wedding dress.
Trying on some of the placeshere.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
You have to bring your own.
Speaker 4 (33:53):
Oh really.
But the thing is with that.
I don't like champagne, I don'tlike drinks with bubbles, it's
just the thought.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
You were like I wasn't going to drink it, but
where is it Tips?
But you should have offered it.
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 4 (34:08):
I guess you have to ask.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, you have to ask .
A lot of places only have itfor your say yes moment.
But if you ask, they'll usuallycough it up Not me being the
alcoholics with the alcoholicgroup.
Wait, now that I know you haveit and I know other stores like
Jackson James, as well asLovella in LA you can bring your
own champagne Not that I didthat, you know.
And if you did.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
who cares?
Wait, I just okay.
So I went to one.
I'm so sorry to interrupt you,but the first one I went to they
didn't.
No, yeah, they didn't offer,but it was kind of like a Galia
Lahav did right at the top.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Okay, they were like we know our shit's expensive.
Speaker 4 (34:42):
Yeah, injured Jackson James had the whole.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Jackson.
James did the whole thing forsure, they were fine, but I
would say food was offeredbecause it was an event, so I
did do a try on there.
At the event there waschampagne, but I don't count
that Totally.
Yeah, no, I wouldn't count iteither, because that one was on
accident.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
But yeah, no, I didn't get it on the first one.
You want the?
Speaker 2 (35:01):
traditional moment, wait, that sucks, you're so
right.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
It's the thought that counts.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
I will send you champagne.
Speaker 4 (35:07):
Thank you, I would have pretended to drink.
Just for the photo, the contentyeah that Content, yeah, that
you can't even post becauseyou're in the dress no,
literally, yeah, wedding dressshopping.
So I feel like I took a reallystrategic approach because,
again, I knew nothing going intothis and then I learned so much
(35:33):
.
So I'm from outside of Phillyand I wanted to go with my
mother-in-law and my mom, so wewent there.
First, there's two stores thatpeople told us to go to and I
was like I probably won't buy mydress at one of these.
I need to go to a place thathas a lot of styles, options,
designers and see what I like onmy body Without giving so much
(35:54):
away.
I obviously I want to be aprincess and be in a ball gown,
but I'm five foot.
That's so not realistic.
So I was like I need to go getthat out of my system.
Literally I probably will go insomething tighter, because I'm
literally so short, I'm 5'1".
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Okay, so we're on the same age here.
Oh, so I'm the tall queen ofthe room.
Okay, no, here's a tall one.
No, this is making so muchsense and you don't even think
about it.
You go in and try on thesegowns and it's like made for a
seven foot, like model.
Speaker 4 (36:23):
It's for a model.
I know my mom was thinking.
I'm a model, and my mom wastrying to break it to me.
She's like you're five foot,Like you're standing on the
pedestal.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
You're really not that tall.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
You're both cute.
My parents are out theregassing me up.
You look like a model.
I fucking don't.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
But I actually found a dress at my first appointment
I believe it was the first one Itried on and we really liked it
.
Like we left thinking that wasthe one.
It wasn't Spo spoiler alert itwas like a tight fitted dress we
were going to switch.
We were going to do so manythings to switch it.
We were going to switch thelace add, like this skirt
(37:07):
situation.
But we were like, oh, like ourstylist, like kind of what we
were going back to, to what wewere saying earlier.
She knew what she was doing.
She heard me.
She was like put this, put thisand do this.
She was great.
And then I went to anotherappointment the same day, hated
everything.
We were like, oh, we like thatother dress so, and the stylist
wasn't that good.
So I really think the stylistcan really make or break the
(37:29):
experience.
I totally agree.
And then, and then I had aMonique Lillier dress on my
Pinterest board for like.
Since I started looking and Iwas like I I have to go try it
on before I commit to adifferent dress, and I'm also
going to go to Mark Ingram,which is another bridal store
here, where they carry a bunchof different designers that I
(37:51):
was interested in here in NewYork.
Totally recommend going there.
Um went to.
Monique hated the dress on me.
It was beautiful.
I just was too short.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Yeah, and it breaks your heart.
I was just so short.
Speaker 4 (38:02):
No I like went in I told the stylist, I was like I
want that dress and he's, andthen I put on and I was like
yeah, and he was like do youwant to try on anything else?
I was like not really.
No, I was like I came for thisreason.
I'm devastated, but that's okay.
It's good to see things youdon't like.
So still thought I was gettingthe other dress next day.
Rolls around, my mom's stillhere.
(38:23):
I actually thought people weredming me go to burda, go to
burda, go to burda.
I got so many dms go to burdaso I was like mom, let's go to
burda.
Um made an appointmentliterally 30 minutes before.
Uh had so much fun trying ondresses there.
I will say, since you haven'ttried it on yet, the one thing
that I found like physically,literally uncomfortable.
(38:44):
They have a bodysuit in all oftheir dresses.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
There's tight ones.
Have bodysuits?
Yeah, I didn't know that.
Yeah, which is?
Speaker 4 (38:51):
really it's smart, it's interesting.
But when I was trying them on Iwas like I feel suffocated,
like it was really interesting.
So I didn't find the one there,but I had lots of fun trying on
their most expensive dresses.
I tried on the dress thatBerta's daughter wore she made
for her.
I know I was like wow, look atme.
(39:12):
And then I went to Mark Ingramthat day, readied by the other
dress, and I had another reallygreat stylist.
I told her what I liked.
She pulls these dresses.
She pulls one.
I was like I like that.
Um, I was like it might be toomuch for you.
We put it on and we were bothlike whoa.
And we were like this is the onethat he was, just like it felt
(39:34):
so special, like you felt likeit was the one.
Um so yeah, did you cry.
That was really exciting, so Idon't cry ever.
It's a really weird thing, solike got engaged, didn't cry,
but I was like I felt emotionalbut I didn't cry, and we were
(39:57):
also getting rushed out of theappointment at the same time.
Like our time was up and we'relike, can we put it on again?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
so but you might be about to buy it so like, let her
exactly.
Speaker 4 (40:08):
I know.
So she did.
Shelly was great.
We love shelly.
Um, talked to her this morning.
So then we were like, oh, thisis the dress.
And then slapped on it and thenI had to wait for my mom to
come back to new york because Iwanted her to be there.
Like they measure every singlepart of your body, something I
didn't know going into- thisliterally, dress is made for you
(40:28):
.
Yes, exactly, um, I was going tosay.
Funny enough, it ended up beinga dress that I had saved on my
Pinterest board as well, that Ididn't even remember.
I was looking back and I waslike, oh my God, that's my dress
.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
I was like, oh, it was meant to be so that actually
happened to me too, and it's itwasn't subconscious, yeah and
okay.
So I don't want to be like thatcrazy.
It wasn't too.
It wasn't the exact photo, butthe style that I was looking for
, that I kept catching myselfpinning.
I was like pinning certainwedding dresses that I thought I
(41:04):
wanted, which was like veryA-line, not quite ball gown but
not quite mermaid, just likeA-line loose, whatever.
And I was like also pinning acertain style that I felt like
was also kind of part of me, andthen that aesthetic came to
fruition in my dress because Iwas like, whoa, this was not
what I am.
Speaker 4 (41:23):
It's so funny how that happened.
It's so funny, start pinning.
Speaker 2 (41:26):
Start pinning.
Well, the funniest part is like.
I've tried on a million dresses, I've had a lot of time,
whatnot, and I thought I wasgoing to, for sure, be a fitted
girly.
That's what's in the Pinterestboard.
Really Definitely a ball gownA-line girly.
Definitely a ball gown A-linegirly, isn't it crazy, you just
flip.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
You just flip it.
You never know, you never know,you don't know until you put a
dress on your body.
Speaker 4 (41:47):
You don't know.
You can't judge it until it'son you.
Speaker 3 (41:49):
Literally and try literally.
Anyone listening, Everyonelistening.
Speaker 4 (41:53):
Everyone, everyone.
Speaker 3 (41:54):
Go, try as many freaking dresses as you can, all
the styles, oh, I agree.
Literally the widest range youcan think of the fun ones that
you're like so-and-so's daughterwore.
I had one.
I tried on the one that everyinfluencer in LA-.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
Is it the?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
Gali Elhav white lace one.
Speaker 2 (42:11):
It's the Kim Kisos ball gown one, the Kim Kisos
ball with the white bead.
Speaker 4 (42:15):
With the white bead yeah, literally.
Speaker 3 (42:16):
That one.
Speaker 4 (42:17):
I know exactly what you're talking about.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
You have to try it on .
You got to get it out of yourstomach, oh my God.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
And it was stunning.
Speaker 3 (42:23):
I was literally like I cannot believe I'm wearing
this on, but like that wholeLike have fun, have fun and do
it, but also have so much gracewith yourself, because although
my finding mine was like sofairytale-like and so beautiful
because of my stylist only, Iwould say the process before
that was like terrible.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Yeah, I cried after the first day of trying on
dresses, because I was just likeso tired it's overwhelming,
yeah.
And I was like kind of concernedabout like the committee making
sure the committee was happyand like I could still come to
realization.
And I'm not going to lie, Ihaven't said yes to the dress
yet, so like I could bebullshitting right now, but like
I don't think I'm going to cry.
I haven't said yes to the dressyet, so like I could be
(43:03):
bullshitting right now, but likeI don't think I'm going to cry
Like I literally think I'm justgoing to be like okay, I'm at
peace Like it's this one, notlike the big dramatic moment and
I'm dramatic girly.
Speaker 3 (43:12):
I think I cried on the second time because I was
like it's done, Like it's a taskcompleted yes, it was beautiful
, that's what my mom said.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
A task completed yes, it was beautiful.
That's what my mom said.
Yeah, I think I was relieved.
She literally said thank Godit's done.
Yeah, it was the anxiety.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Absolutely.
I think that's what it was.
Obviously, I did love it, but Ihaven't cried for anything else
and it also wasn't this crazydramatic cry.
It was a little teary-eyedbecause everyone's staring at
you telling you how beautifulyou are.
So I was like that is reallykind Like wow, it's going to
happen at your wedding too.
I know I was like, oh God, whatam I going to do?
(43:47):
Got to get prepared, startpracticing, give yourself grace.
Give yourself so much grace and, like any standard you have for
yourself, just kind of try tothrow it out the window and just
accept your body in the moment,because I was really struggling
.
The first video I put onInstagram where it's like come
with me to try on dresses andlike I don't know, it's a reel I
made, I don't even know why.
I posted it because I hate thatvideo so much and it did so
(44:10):
well-ish, because we all want tosee dresses.
Speaker 1 (44:12):
Oh my God, yeah, everyone wants to see the
dresses and people are like ohmy God, stephanie.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
I was like, guys, this was the worst day of my
life and I'm posting it becauseI tried on fun dresses and I
want to share them.
But there was one dress therethat is still my Roman Empire.
Speaker 1 (44:24):
Yeah, it's in my head rent free, but yeah, it happens
.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Because if you're short and not, tall like this
girl.
You're short Not everyone's anextra, extra, extra small.
It is what it is, yeah.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
Okay, I was going to say no dresses fit in any way
shape.
They're all like they're, soeither so big, so small, it's
like the craziest sizing thatthey have.
It just makes no sense.
Um, but I will say I don't knowif you guys did this.
Going to more than one place totry on dresses in one day is so
much.
It is so exhausting, sooverwhelming.
(45:02):
It's like the headache you getfrom going to the mall times a
thousand.
You're drained.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
Yeah, two a day is an absolute max.
Three, you're actually crazyyeah.
Speaker 4 (45:12):
No, I agree.
No Three, you're out of yourmind.
Mental capacity One you'retired.
Speaker 2 (45:17):
See, I can handle two , but I'm nuts.
We did oh, I was losing my mind.
See, I can handle two, but likeI'm nuts, like we did, oh, I
was losing my mind, I can.
The first day we did one andthen two, and then the third day
we ended with just one and Iwas like oh, like that was a lot
.
But I could have done a secondin that day, but no way should
anybody ever do three in a day,in my opinion.
Speaker 3 (45:36):
No, no, no, no.
I don't think you give yourselfenough time to sit in it either
you give yourself enough timeto sit in it?
Speaker 2 (45:44):
No, not at all.
Okay.
That being said, I want toshift into wedding planning like
a little bit.
Who do you not share youropinions about your wedding?
Speaker 1 (45:52):
Thank you so much for listening to Confessions of a
Wannabe it Girl.
Don't forget to rate andsubscribe to the show.
As always, we'll see you nextTuesday.
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