February 4, 2024 • 25 mins
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Say goodbye to the guilt and shame that have handcuffed your happiness, and join me as we redefine what it means to lead with vibrancy. We'll navigate through the belief systems that chain us to the grindstone and discover that, sometimes, stepping away to indulge in a little fun is exactly what our business needs to breakthrough. This episode isn't just a conversation; it's a revolution in embracing pleasure as a catalyst for growth, and I'm excited for us to embark on this path of ease, flow, and yes, a touch of magic. Let's commit to tearing down barriers and building a life that's not just efficient but effervescent.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Imagine igniting more pleasure and fun into your work
week and gaining a massivebenefit from this, including
more money, better relationshipsand a more vibrant radiant
energy that magnetizesopportunities to you.
(00:21):
Stay with us.
We're diving in in this episode.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
We're tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader
podcast, your premierdestination for breaking through
your current professionalbarriers.
Your coach and host, Lisa Jeffs, will help you transcend
limitations and achieve newlevels of professional success
beyond self-doubt, sabotage andburnout.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Welcome to the show.
We are now in 2024.
This is season two of Confident, connected Leader, where we're
going to be diving deeper intowhat it means to truly be
connected to you.
And what I mean by connected inthis sense is really tapping
(01:15):
into your authentic, energeticsignature, which is what you
bring to the table of your work,your genius and what is going
to truly magnetize the rightteam members, the right clients,
(01:42):
the right opportunities acrossthe board.
When we are operating from aplace of authenticity to who we
are and what we are here toexperience in the world, magic
unfolds.
This episode we're going to betalking about beyond achieving
(02:04):
and the essential role ofpleasure and fun in leadership.
I'm going to be speakingdirectly from a feminine lens
because I do believe in theworld of business that many
(02:24):
women and these are generalstatements, so these are not
applicable for every woman orevery man these are applicable
for what I've seen in my worldand what I've experienced.
I know for myself.
I've spent many years in a rolewhere achieving a goal was very
(02:48):
important.
It was my primary focus,whether that was a goal in my
own body when I was runningmarathons or was training hard
for weightlifting.
Whether it was a goal in schoolor work-related,
business-related, there wasalways a focus on doing,
(03:11):
achieving the mental aspect ofit.
A lot of time in my brain, alot of time thinking so much
that sometimes it was hard toshut off at night.
And this is something I seeoften with people who come to me
seeking help.
They are very much in a role ofdoing.
(03:35):
Sometimes they're not achievingwhat they want to achieve.
A lot of times they areachieving what they want to
achieve and they want to knowwhy.
They have questions on.
I mean, I'm doing all thesethings but I'm not moving the
needle, I'm not breaking throughthat upper limit, and the key
here, or the strategy, is notdoing more whatsoever.
(04:00):
It's really looking at whatneeds to change within.
All right, we need to look atwhat is going on within us that
is preventing us from breakingthrough the next side.
And I want to really dive intothe role of pleasure and fun,
(04:21):
because it's very overlooked inour society.
It's very deprioritized and I'moffering, through this episode,
a new perspective that I inviteeveryone to bring in of
pleasure and fun is not a rewardfor doing work, and this is
(04:45):
challenging because this is,especially in North America how
we've been raised.
When we went to school, when wewent to elementary school, what
was the reward for sitting anddoing work?
The reward was recess.
So we would enjoy time outsideas a reward for doing our work.
(05:07):
Sometimes, when we didn't getfinished our work, we wouldn't
get recess.
Do you see where the problemstems from?
That?
As adults, we often put thisgoalpost in front of us, and I'm
talking in regards to businessowners.
(05:28):
So business owners or businessleader in the corporate realm,
where we have certain targets wewant to meet and we are working
towards these targets, oftennot realizing that as soon as we
get to that target, we rarelytake time to enjoy it and then
(05:52):
it's off to the next target.
So when we see ignitingpleasure and fun into our day as
a reward for a job well done,we are doing ourselves a grave
disservice and a lot of timeswhat happens is we become very
(06:12):
numbed out, very unfulfilled,and can really put a damper on
our creativity and ourinnovation.
So why is this important?
Why do we want to ignite andprioritize pleasure and fun?
(06:34):
And those are different, right,pleasure is different than fun,
but they are on the same line.
So if you're not having a lotof fun in your life, I can
pretty much guess you're nothaving a lot of pleasure, and
vice versa.
So here's a challenge that I seewith a lot of female business
(06:56):
leaders and men.
If you're listening, I inviteyou to stay, because this is
probably applicable to you.
I'm simply speaking through thefemale lens, because this is
what I know is that often we canallow ourselves these rest days
right, or we can go to the spa,and there's nothing wrong with
(07:22):
any of that.
In fact, it's highly encouraged.
But I want to look beyond whatwe can do for ourselves as
leaders, beyond the spa day.
Often when we do activitieslike that at least I know for
myself it's a form of relaxation, whether I've been working
(07:46):
really hard on a project or I'mtired and I just want to go and
get away and have a nicerelaxing day.
And sometimes even that can bechallenging if we're very heady
and we are thinking, thinking,thinking.
Sometimes we're not evenpresent to enjoy that spa day.
And again, there's igniting andprioritizing pleasure and fun
(08:12):
into your day and really sellingyourself on why this is
important.
It so goes beyond the and I'musing spa day as a general idea
Because, as a society, at leastspecifically in North America,
(08:34):
we've given permission to thesesort of things.
So we've given permission to gohave a relaxing day or go have
a time where you're unwinding.
It's very much seen as we havea permission slip for it.
(08:54):
But if we're looking at pleasureor fun, there can be a lot of
shame in regards to that.
So if you look at someone who'sindulging in a pleasurable
activity, thinking about howsociety shames this, so whether
that is indulging in, even theword indulging, what does that
(09:18):
bring up for you?
What do you think?
Is that something that youareis in your mind thinking
immediately this is notsomething that's beneficial, or
is it, oh, indulging, I'mintrigued, I'm curious about
that.
Or does your brain immediatelygo to that something that's bad
or wrong?
(09:38):
Because if we think about whatpeople indulge in, whether that
is in luxury or food or Now time, time off, sex shopping, often
we can bring up a lot of ideasthat say, okay, this is wrong or
(10:03):
bad or it's been shamed,whereas really what's wrong with
it?
Indulging is quite differentthan having an addiction to or
using it as a means wheresomeone else is getting hurt in
the process, because indulgingin something does not constitute
(10:29):
all those negatives.
But when we think aboutpleasure, often we think about
indulging, and when there's somuch shame wrapped up in it,
then we are not going toprioritize it or where it's
going to be hard for us toprioritize it.
So let's redefine what thismeans, because when we
prioritize pleasure and fun,it's going to boost your
(10:53):
creativity and your innovation.
Immerse yourself in activitiesdaily that bring you joy is
going to significantly enhanceyour creativity.
Pleasure acts as a catalyst forinnovative thinking.
Think about how many timesyou've been trying to figure
(11:16):
something out or trying to dosomething and you're working
really hard and you're at yourcomputer or you're doing
something and it's just notworking.
It's just not going, the wheelsaren't turning and nothing is
coming from it.
And you step away and you go dosomething and suddenly the idea
(11:37):
comes or suddenly you haveclarity, igniting scheduling.
In prioritizing pleasure andfun, you are breaking the
monotony of routine and allowingthese fresh ideas to surface.
This edge is invaluable in yourleadership, whether wherever
(12:01):
you are working, whatever sphereyou are working in, igniting
and prioritizing pleasure isgoing to enhance your resiliency
.
I want you to think about, in asense, where.
Think about someone or evenyourself when you've been
overworked.
You're overworked, you're burntout, you're tired.
(12:25):
Think about when someone comesand asks you for something.
You've already had a hard day,you've been doing all this,
you've been doing all that andthen someone asks what's your
response?
Typically, you're going to geta little irritated or you're
going to have some responsethat's not your favorite,
(12:46):
desirable response Becauseyou're so overworked.
It's like when I see this as avisual, it's like a stick that
has no, that's just been in theheat and it's.
You know, we snap it and itjust snaps.
It's fragile, it just breaks.
Whereas if you're ignitingpleasure into your life, it's
(13:11):
like bringing in this flow ofenergy, this I don't like using
the word juicy, but I'm going touse it here this juicy energy
into your life, where you're nolonger a stick that just breaks
easy.
Right?
You know those sticks I don'tknow when.
You remember being a kid andpicking up those fresh branches
(13:36):
and they were really hard tobreak, they were really
resilient.
You could bend them and twistthem and they weren't breaking.
This is what happens when youare feeling alive with energy,
because you are prioritizing howyou feel, things that you love
to do, and you become thisradiant, vibrant, emotionally
(13:59):
resilient business leader.
I can't tell you how manybenefits that prioritizing fun
and joy and pleasure is going tobring you.
I can simply Google it and find, I'm sure, many, many
(14:24):
researched articles on the topic.
Even our logic can say, yeah,it's going to help our health
and well-being, and at the coreof any leader, the foundation of
good leadership, is health andwell-being.
So there's so many sellingpoints to this.
(14:44):
Why don't we prioritize it?
Why is it so hard?
I know for myself.
Part of it is simply justbelieving we are deserving, and
there's a lot of women who havebeen programmed away from
believing that we deservepleasure in our lives.
(15:05):
And let's define what pleasureis for a minute, because a lot
of times our brain can go to sexas pleasure and as that it
completely is part of it or ispart of that realm.
Pleasure can simply mean when Ithink of it, because I'm
prioritizing.
The reason why I'm doing thispodcast is moving into 2024.
(15:31):
This has been a big focus forme that I am no longer okay with
just climbing ladders as much,as my ambitions are not going to
change, they've actually gottenbigger.
The way about it I am movinginto a place that accepts much
(15:55):
more, allowing in as opposed tomaking things happen, which is
fine, and I did it for manyyears.
But moving into my mid to myearly mid 40s, I'm no longer
available for that.
I'm no longer in that space, atleast not now.
That may change at any point,but now I'm in a space that I'm
(16:18):
excited to allow more and when Ithink about pleasure, what I
think about it is really beingpresent, mindful and asking
myself daily what it is that I'mneeding and desiring in the
world of pleasure and fun, andgiving that to me myself,
(16:42):
without the guilt or without theshame.
So what I invite you to do andI'm in a program that starts
this week that's going to helpto guide me.
So this is going to be anongoing conversation of what I'm
noticing by prioritizingpleasure and prioritizing fun.
(17:05):
I think the recommended hoursto schedule in minimum four
recommended six to 10.
That's a lot of time and I'm upfor it, but I don't.
I invite you to start with 20minutes and if there's any
excuses that you are coming upwith where you can't put in 20
(17:30):
minutes, I want you to challengethose excuses.
Ultimately, I think a goodtimeframe before is minimum a
few hours a week that should bescheduled in for pleasure and
fun minimum.
So if you have nothingscheduled in right now, I invite
you to put in 20 minutes Now byputting that in.
(17:50):
If you think to yourself, Ihave no idea what I would
actually do in that time.
That's a great place to be.
You're in an exploratory time ofgetting to know yourself better
, of inquiring what it is that Ienjoy, what it is that is
actually going to bring mepleasure.
What is that?
(18:10):
Maybe it's simply picking up ahobby that you have wanted to do
for a long time but you haven'tallowed yourself the time to do
it.
Maybe it is simply connectingdeeper with your body, whatever
that means.
There's many, many, many, manyof us who are disconnected from
(18:33):
our body.
We live in our heads, we arethinking and thinking and
overthinking and planning andstrategizing, and we're in our
heads and when we're relaxingalso, we're not really in our
body relaxing.
So maybe it's simply that.
Maybe it's simply connectingmore into your body.
(18:54):
What it feels like, bringingyour attention from your mind
into your heart space and askingyour heart space what is it
that you need?
What is it that you're desiringand practicing this week,
honoring and committing to thattime you putting into your
(19:16):
calendar and just taking noticeof the excuses that come up or
what you're saying to yourselfor the resistance that's coming
up Again.
I'll reiterate shame is a bigone for this Right.
If you are scheduling it in forseven o'clock on a Monday,
let's say, and you havesomething to hand in or a prior
(19:40):
to, or work to get done and it'snot done yet.
Look and see, pay attention towhat you're telling yourself.
That are you?
Are you easily ready to wipethat 20 minute commitment out of
your calendar to get more workdone?
Do you feel guilty forprioritizing a pleasure and fun
(20:04):
when there's still work to bedone?
Do you feel ashamed,embarrassed?
Would you tell someone thatthis is what you're doing or
would you feel reallyembarrassed about it?
These are things you want tolook at, because these are the
things that are operating behindthe scenes and controlling
really the level of fulfillment,satisfaction and joy that you
(20:28):
are allowing into your life.
Even when I'm working with aclient who comes to me, who is
stuck and stagnant at a certainpoint in their business, the
answer is never doing more.
Never doing more of the samethings might mean a different
(20:48):
strategy.
It might mean doing somethingdifferently, but it's never
simply doing more of what's notalways working.
And imperative is when we go inand look at the belief systems
that are operating and almost, Iwould argue, every single one
(21:11):
I'd have to sit down and reallythink about.
Has there been one that been aclient who's been igniting joy
and pleasure and fun into a lifethat has, as I don't think so,
not that I can remember.
I've been coaching for over 10years and I don't believe that
there has.
Often it's this person isoverworked, they're burning out,
(21:33):
they're very much in their heada lot of the time, disconnected
from their body, and they'rejust looping around the same
thing over and over and overagain and there are no way,
shape or form prioritizing funor pleasure.
It's counterintuitive to.
It goes against what our brain,our ego, is telling us right.
(21:59):
Our ego says do more, you can't, there's no time for pleasure
and fun.
That's irresponsible.
We have to figure this out.
We have to figure this out anda person will just loop the same
thought pattern around andaround and often the answer is
stepping away, going andchanging your state, your state
(22:23):
of being, your frequency run up.
What better way to raise yourfrequency to indulging in
something pleasurable andallowing your next step to come
in.
Imagine that, that we actuallyget to indulge in pleasure and
get the answers we need.
(22:44):
This is what I'm challengingyou to do to play with, because
easy said than done when, let'ssay, we have a bill that we need
to pay and we're trying tofigure out where the money is
going to come from, and then youhave Lisa over here.
(23:07):
Coach, lisa say go do somethingpleasurable and fun, your mind
is going to go to that's insane,that's irresponsible.
No way I'm going to sit andfigure this out some more.
When we do the same things overand over, we get the same
results.
So if you're in a place whereyou're ready to really explode
(23:27):
not only your business, andexplode in a good way and enjoy
your life because life is shortand we are not here forever and
you're ready to experience themagic that life has and the
vibrancy and magnetism that youcan hold as a leader, which is
(23:52):
not only going to help yourmission, it's going to help
every aspect of your life unfoldwith so much more ease and flow
and magic than this is anon-negotiable.
I'm here with you.
I'm not speaking on this topicas an expert.
I'm speaking on it as a studentwho is in the process of
(24:18):
experiencing this for herself.
Let's stay connected.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Thank you for tuning into the Confident, connected
Leader podcast.
Lisa Jeffs is committed tohelping you break through
barriers and climb to newprofessional heights.
Today's episode inspired you.
We'd be honored if you couldsubscribe, rate and leave a
review To stay updated withpractical tips and insights.
Follow us on LinkedIn,instagram or Facebook.
(24:47):
You'll find all relevant links,including those for our
complimentary gifts andtrainings, in the show notes.
Until our next episode, embraceyour confidence and stay
connected.
Imagine igniting more pleasure and fun into your work
week and gaining a massivebenefit from this, including
more money, better relationshipsand a more vibrant radiant
energy that magnetizesopportunities to you.
(00:21):
Stay with us.
We're diving in in this episode.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
We're tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader
podcast, your premierdestination for breaking through
your current professionalbarriers.
Your coach and host, Lisa Jeffs, will help you transcend
limitations and achieve newlevels of professional success
beyond self-doubt, sabotage andburnout.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Welcome to the show.
We are now in 2024.
This is season two of Confident, connected Leader, where we're
going to be diving deeper intowhat it means to truly be
connected to you.
And what I mean by connected inthis sense is really tapping
(01:15):
into your authentic, energeticsignature, which is what you
bring to the table of your work,your genius and what is going
to truly magnetize the rightteam members, the right clients,
(01:42):
the right opportunities acrossthe board.
When we are operating from aplace of authenticity to who we
are and what we are here toexperience in the world, magic
unfolds.
This episode we're going to betalking about beyond achieving
(02:04):
and the essential role ofpleasure and fun in leadership.
I'm going to be speakingdirectly from a feminine lens
because I do believe in theworld of business that many
(02:24):
women and these are generalstatements, so these are not
applicable for every woman orevery man these are applicable
for what I've seen in my worldand what I've experienced.
I know for myself.
I've spent many years in a rolewhere achieving a goal was very
(02:48):
important.
It was my primary focus,whether that was a goal in my
own body when I was runningmarathons or was training hard
for weightlifting.
Whether it was a goal in schoolor work-related,
business-related, there wasalways a focus on doing,
(03:11):
achieving the mental aspect ofit.
A lot of time in my brain, alot of time thinking so much
that sometimes it was hard toshut off at night.
And this is something I seeoften with people who come to me
seeking help.
They are very much in a role ofdoing.
(03:35):
Sometimes they're not achievingwhat they want to achieve.
A lot of times they areachieving what they want to
achieve and they want to knowwhy.
They have questions on.
I mean, I'm doing all thesethings but I'm not moving the
needle, I'm not breaking throughthat upper limit, and the key
here, or the strategy, is notdoing more whatsoever.
(04:00):
It's really looking at whatneeds to change within.
All right, we need to look atwhat is going on within us that
is preventing us from breakingthrough the next side.
And I want to really dive intothe role of pleasure and fun,
(04:21):
because it's very overlooked inour society.
It's very deprioritized and I'moffering, through this episode,
a new perspective that I inviteeveryone to bring in of
pleasure and fun is not a rewardfor doing work, and this is
(04:45):
challenging because this is,especially in North America how
we've been raised.
When we went to school, when wewent to elementary school, what
was the reward for sitting anddoing work?
The reward was recess.
So we would enjoy time outsideas a reward for doing our work.
(05:07):
Sometimes, when we didn't getfinished our work, we wouldn't
get recess.
Do you see where the problemstems from?
That?
As adults, we often put thisgoalpost in front of us, and I'm
talking in regards to businessowners.
(05:28):
So business owners or businessleader in the corporate realm,
where we have certain targets wewant to meet and we are working
towards these targets, oftennot realizing that as soon as we
get to that target, we rarelytake time to enjoy it and then
(05:52):
it's off to the next target.
So when we see ignitingpleasure and fun into our day as
a reward for a job well done,we are doing ourselves a grave
disservice and a lot of timeswhat happens is we become very
(06:12):
numbed out, very unfulfilled,and can really put a damper on
our creativity and ourinnovation.
So why is this important?
Why do we want to ignite andprioritize pleasure and fun?
(06:34):
And those are different, right,pleasure is different than fun,
but they are on the same line.
So if you're not having a lotof fun in your life, I can
pretty much guess you're nothaving a lot of pleasure, and
vice versa.
So here's a challenge that I seewith a lot of female business
(06:56):
leaders and men.
If you're listening, I inviteyou to stay, because this is
probably applicable to you.
I'm simply speaking through thefemale lens, because this is
what I know is that often we canallow ourselves these rest days
right, or we can go to the spa,and there's nothing wrong with
(07:22):
any of that.
In fact, it's highly encouraged.
But I want to look beyond whatwe can do for ourselves as
leaders, beyond the spa day.
Often when we do activitieslike that at least I know for
myself it's a form of relaxation, whether I've been working
(07:46):
really hard on a project or I'mtired and I just want to go and
get away and have a nicerelaxing day.
And sometimes even that can bechallenging if we're very heady
and we are thinking, thinking,thinking.
Sometimes we're not evenpresent to enjoy that spa day.
And again, there's igniting andprioritizing pleasure and fun
(08:12):
into your day and really sellingyourself on why this is
important.
It so goes beyond the and I'musing spa day as a general idea
Because, as a society, at leastspecifically in North America,
(08:34):
we've given permission to thesesort of things.
So we've given permission to gohave a relaxing day or go have
a time where you're unwinding.
It's very much seen as we havea permission slip for it.
(08:54):
But if we're looking at pleasureor fun, there can be a lot of
shame in regards to that.
So if you look at someone who'sindulging in a pleasurable
activity, thinking about howsociety shames this, so whether
that is indulging in, even theword indulging, what does that
(09:18):
bring up for you?
What do you think?
Is that something that youareis in your mind thinking
immediately this is notsomething that's beneficial, or
is it, oh, indulging, I'mintrigued, I'm curious about
that.
Or does your brain immediatelygo to that something that's bad
or wrong?
(09:38):
Because if we think about whatpeople indulge in, whether that
is in luxury or food or Now time, time off, sex shopping, often
we can bring up a lot of ideasthat say, okay, this is wrong or
(10:03):
bad or it's been shamed,whereas really what's wrong with
it?
Indulging is quite differentthan having an addiction to or
using it as a means wheresomeone else is getting hurt in
the process, because indulgingin something does not constitute
(10:29):
all those negatives.
But when we think aboutpleasure, often we think about
indulging, and when there's somuch shame wrapped up in it,
then we are not going toprioritize it or where it's
going to be hard for us toprioritize it.
So let's redefine what thismeans, because when we
prioritize pleasure and fun,it's going to boost your
(10:53):
creativity and your innovation.
Immerse yourself in activitiesdaily that bring you joy is
going to significantly enhanceyour creativity.
Pleasure acts as a catalyst forinnovative thinking.
Think about how many timesyou've been trying to figure
(11:16):
something out or trying to dosomething and you're working
really hard and you're at yourcomputer or you're doing
something and it's just notworking.
It's just not going, the wheelsaren't turning and nothing is
coming from it.
And you step away and you go dosomething and suddenly the idea
(11:37):
comes or suddenly you haveclarity, igniting scheduling.
In prioritizing pleasure andfun, you are breaking the
monotony of routine and allowingthese fresh ideas to surface.
This edge is invaluable in yourleadership, whether wherever
(12:01):
you are working, whatever sphereyou are working in, igniting
and prioritizing pleasure isgoing to enhance your resiliency
.
I want you to think about, in asense, where.
Think about someone or evenyourself when you've been
overworked.
You're overworked, you're burntout, you're tired.
(12:25):
Think about when someone comesand asks you for something.
You've already had a hard day,you've been doing all this,
you've been doing all that andthen someone asks what's your
response?
Typically, you're going to geta little irritated or you're
going to have some responsethat's not your favorite,
(12:46):
desirable response Becauseyou're so overworked.
It's like when I see this as avisual, it's like a stick that
has no, that's just been in theheat and it's.
You know, we snap it and itjust snaps.
It's fragile, it just breaks.
Whereas if you're ignitingpleasure into your life, it's
(13:11):
like bringing in this flow ofenergy, this I don't like using
the word juicy, but I'm going touse it here this juicy energy
into your life, where you're nolonger a stick that just breaks
easy.
Right?
You know those sticks I don'tknow when.
You remember being a kid andpicking up those fresh branches
(13:36):
and they were really hard tobreak, they were really
resilient.
You could bend them and twistthem and they weren't breaking.
This is what happens when youare feeling alive with energy,
because you are prioritizing howyou feel, things that you love
to do, and you become thisradiant, vibrant, emotionally
(13:59):
resilient business leader.
I can't tell you how manybenefits that prioritizing fun
and joy and pleasure is going tobring you.
I can simply Google it and find, I'm sure, many, many
(14:24):
researched articles on the topic.
Even our logic can say, yeah,it's going to help our health
and well-being, and at the coreof any leader, the foundation of
good leadership, is health andwell-being.
So there's so many sellingpoints to this.
(14:44):
Why don't we prioritize it?
Why is it so hard?
I know for myself.
Part of it is simply justbelieving we are deserving, and
there's a lot of women who havebeen programmed away from
believing that we deservepleasure in our lives.
(15:05):
And let's define what pleasureis for a minute, because a lot
of times our brain can go to sexas pleasure and as that it
completely is part of it or ispart of that realm.
Pleasure can simply mean when Ithink of it, because I'm
prioritizing.
The reason why I'm doing thispodcast is moving into 2024.
(15:31):
This has been a big focus forme that I am no longer okay with
just climbing ladders as much,as my ambitions are not going to
change, they've actually gottenbigger.
The way about it I am movinginto a place that accepts much
(15:55):
more, allowing in as opposed tomaking things happen, which is
fine, and I did it for manyyears.
But moving into my mid to myearly mid 40s, I'm no longer
available for that.
I'm no longer in that space, atleast not now.
That may change at any point,but now I'm in a space that I'm
(16:18):
excited to allow more and when Ithink about pleasure, what I
think about it is really beingpresent, mindful and asking
myself daily what it is that I'mneeding and desiring in the
world of pleasure and fun, andgiving that to me myself,
(16:42):
without the guilt or without theshame.
So what I invite you to do andI'm in a program that starts
this week that's going to helpto guide me.
So this is going to be anongoing conversation of what I'm
noticing by prioritizingpleasure and prioritizing fun.
(17:05):
I think the recommended hoursto schedule in minimum four
recommended six to 10.
That's a lot of time and I'm upfor it, but I don't.
I invite you to start with 20minutes and if there's any
excuses that you are coming upwith where you can't put in 20
(17:30):
minutes, I want you to challengethose excuses.
Ultimately, I think a goodtimeframe before is minimum a
few hours a week that should bescheduled in for pleasure and
fun minimum.
So if you have nothingscheduled in right now, I invite
you to put in 20 minutes Now byputting that in.
(17:50):
If you think to yourself, Ihave no idea what I would
actually do in that time.
That's a great place to be.
You're in an exploratory time ofgetting to know yourself better
, of inquiring what it is that Ienjoy, what it is that is
actually going to bring mepleasure.
What is that?
(18:10):
Maybe it's simply picking up ahobby that you have wanted to do
for a long time but you haven'tallowed yourself the time to do
it.
Maybe it is simply connectingdeeper with your body, whatever
that means.
There's many, many, many, manyof us who are disconnected from
(18:33):
our body.
We live in our heads, we arethinking and thinking and
overthinking and planning andstrategizing, and we're in our
heads and when we're relaxingalso, we're not really in our
body relaxing.
So maybe it's simply that.
Maybe it's simply connectingmore into your body.
(18:54):
What it feels like, bringingyour attention from your mind
into your heart space and askingyour heart space what is it
that you need?
What is it that you're desiringand practicing this week,
honoring and committing to thattime you putting into your
(19:16):
calendar and just taking noticeof the excuses that come up or
what you're saying to yourselfor the resistance that's coming
up Again.
I'll reiterate shame is a bigone for this Right.
If you are scheduling it in forseven o'clock on a Monday,
let's say, and you havesomething to hand in or a prior
(19:40):
to, or work to get done and it'snot done yet.
Look and see, pay attention towhat you're telling yourself.
That are you?
Are you easily ready to wipethat 20 minute commitment out of
your calendar to get more workdone?
Do you feel guilty forprioritizing a pleasure and fun
(20:04):
when there's still work to bedone?
Do you feel ashamed,embarrassed?
Would you tell someone thatthis is what you're doing or
would you feel reallyembarrassed about it?
These are things you want tolook at, because these are the
things that are operating behindthe scenes and controlling
really the level of fulfillment,satisfaction and joy that you
(20:28):
are allowing into your life.
Even when I'm working with aclient who comes to me, who is
stuck and stagnant at a certainpoint in their business, the
answer is never doing more.
Never doing more of the samethings might mean a different
(20:48):
strategy.
It might mean doing somethingdifferently, but it's never
simply doing more of what's notalways working.
And imperative is when we go inand look at the belief systems
that are operating and almost, Iwould argue, every single one
(21:11):
I'd have to sit down and reallythink about.
Has there been one that been aclient who's been igniting joy
and pleasure and fun into a lifethat has, as I don't think so,
not that I can remember.
I've been coaching for over 10years and I don't believe that
there has.
Often it's this person isoverworked, they're burning out,
(21:33):
they're very much in their heada lot of the time, disconnected
from their body, and they'rejust looping around the same
thing over and over and overagain and there are no way,
shape or form prioritizing funor pleasure.
It's counterintuitive to.
It goes against what our brain,our ego, is telling us right.
(21:59):
Our ego says do more, you can't, there's no time for pleasure
and fun.
That's irresponsible.
We have to figure this out.
We have to figure this out anda person will just loop the same
thought pattern around andaround and often the answer is
stepping away, going andchanging your state, your state
(22:23):
of being, your frequency run up.
What better way to raise yourfrequency to indulging in
something pleasurable andallowing your next step to come
in.
Imagine that, that we actuallyget to indulge in pleasure and
get the answers we need.
(22:44):
This is what I'm challengingyou to do to play with, because
easy said than done when, let'ssay, we have a bill that we need
to pay and we're trying tofigure out where the money is
going to come from, and then youhave Lisa over here.
(23:07):
Coach, lisa say go do somethingpleasurable and fun, your mind
is going to go to that's insane,that's irresponsible.
No way I'm going to sit andfigure this out some more.
When we do the same things overand over, we get the same
results.
So if you're in a place whereyou're ready to really explode
(23:27):
not only your business, andexplode in a good way and enjoy
your life because life is shortand we are not here forever and
you're ready to experience themagic that life has and the
vibrancy and magnetism that youcan hold as a leader, which is
(23:52):
not only going to help yourmission, it's going to help
every aspect of your life unfoldwith so much more ease and flow
and magic than this is anon-negotiable.
I'm here with you.
I'm not speaking on this topicas an expert.
I'm speaking on it as a studentwho is in the process of
(24:18):
experiencing this for herself.
Let's stay connected.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Thank you for tuning into the Confident, connected
Leader podcast.
Lisa Jeffs is committed tohelping you break through
barriers and climb to newprofessional heights.
Today's episode inspired you.
We'd be honored if you couldsubscribe, rate and leave a
review To stay updated withpractical tips and insights.
Follow us on LinkedIn,instagram or Facebook.
(24:47):
You'll find all relevant links,including those for our
complimentary gifts andtrainings, in the show notes.
Until our next episode, embraceyour confidence and stay
connected.
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