September 4, 2025 • 18 mins
Join host Shelby John as she shares powerful strategies for navigating transition times in sobriety. Whether you're dealing with back-to-school stress, seasonal changes, or major life shifts, this episode provides actionable tools to help you thrive instead of just survive.
What You'll Learn:
5 Essential Transition Tools for Women in Recovery:
- Transition Rituals - How to intentionally mark changes and set intentions
- The STOP Technique - A proven method to rewire your brain's stress response
- Support Check-ins - Building proactive connection points before you're struggling
- Energy Audits - Protecting your energy during overwhelming times
- Nervous System Reset - Revolutionary approach using remote neurofeedback therapy
Key Topics Covered:
- Why transitions trigger women in recovery more intensely
- How substance use rewires our brain's response to uncertainty
- Creating new neural pathways for conscious choice vs reactive behavior
- Back-to-basics approach during high-stress periods
- Remote neurofeedback therapy as brain training for regulation
Featured Resource:
Learn about Shelby's remote neurofeedback therapy program - a non-invasive, at-home brain training solution that helps retrain your nervous system's response to stress, anxiety, and triggers. Perfect for women ready to take their recovery to the next level.
Shelby's Website: www.shelbyjohn.com
Free Consultation: Available for remote neurofeedback therapy.
Support the show
Oh, and by the way, if you didn’t know, my remote Neurofeedback Therapy program is up and running. Learn more here!
If you aren't part of the Confident Sober Women Facebook group, it's a great place to be. There are over a thousand other sober women there building lives they don't want to escape from. Come on over and join us.
And if you haven't read my memoir, grab a copy today and maybe a second one for a friend. There is so much hope in recovery, and I shared my story so raw and vulnerable so that others would know they aren't alone and that there is a way to live well, manage relationships, parent your kids, and have a healthy body, all while staying sober. Grab a copy of Recovering in Recovery: The Life-Changing Joy of Sobriety wherever books are sold.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Hello and welcome to the Confident Sober Women
podcast.
I'm your guide, shelby John.
I'm the mother of three, wifeto one and sober since July 1st
2002.
As sober women, we havesomething huge in common, and
when we share our lives and ourstories with each other, we feel
that sense of belonging andconnection.
(00:30):
So we know we are no longeralone.
In this podcast you will hearreal life talk about building
confidence and transforming yourlife beyond recovery.
So come on, let's talk recovery.
So come on, let's talk.
Hey, it's me, shelby.
(00:50):
Have you ever wondered what'sreally happening in your brain
during recovery?
Are you ready to take controlof your anxiety, sleep better
and finally feel focused andconfident?
I want to introduce you to agame changer that's transforming
women's recovery remoteneurofeedback therapy.
I want you to a game changerthat's transforming women's
recovery Remote neurofeedbacktherapy.
I want you to think of this asa personal trainer for your
brain.
It's helping you build newneuropathways right from the
(01:14):
comfort of your own home.
So if you're dealing withanxiety that just won't quit, if
you have ADHD that's makinglife chaotic or sleep issues
that leave you exhausted,neurofeedback could be your
missing piece.
It's science-backed braintraining that works with your
natural healing process, helpingyou regulate emotions and build
(01:37):
lasting confidence.
The best part is, you don'tneed to add another appointment
to your busy schedule.
My remote neurofeedback programbrings professional guidance
and support right to your livingroom.
Do you want to learn more aboutneurofeedback therapy?
You can go to my website,wwwshelbyjohncom to download my
(01:58):
free guide.
Is Neurofeedback Right for you?
Together, we'll create the calm, confident future you that you
deserve.
That's wwwshelbyjohncom.
Take the first step towardstraining your brain for lasting
change.
Well, hey there, sober ladies,thank you so much for joining me
today for the Confident, soberWomen podcast, where we are
(02:20):
creating a movement of powerful,wisdom-seeking women who are
building lives of confidence,joy and profound personal
enlightenment beyond initialrecovery.
I'm your host, shelby John, andevery week we have empowering
conversations to help you builda life you don't want to escape
(02:41):
from, because we all knowsobriety is only the beginning,
and today we're talking aboutsomething that can catch even
the strongest woman in recoveryoff guard, and that is
transition times.
Of course, we are in the backto school rush that's happening
right now.
There's also the shift fromsummer to fall, and there might
(03:04):
even be other major life changesor transitions that are causing
you to feel emotional landminesand can create some unrest for
those of us in recovery.
I know in my own life wetransitioned our two daughters
back to college and my son,who's the youngest, is a senior
in high school, and so thatmeans at the end of this year we
(03:24):
will have two graduates.
And to say this has been anemotional time is a bit of an
understatement for me.
I find myself tearing up atrandom times, not able to keep
their bedroom doors open, andeven spending excess money on
Amazon to contribute to my quoteunquote making things era,
(03:46):
which I'm branding as a newcoping skill.
So I say all of that to let youknow that I'm right there, in
it with you and staying sober,one day at a time through it all
.
But here's what I want you toknow that right from the start,
you don't have to white knuckleyour way through these
challenging times.
Today, I want to share with youfive practical tools you can
start using immediately.
(04:07):
Plus, then, I'm going to tellyou about a game changing
resource that's beentransforming lives in my
practice, including my ownremote neurofeedback therapy.
So let's first ask the questionwhy do transitions trigger us so
much in recovery?
And I want to get real for amoment.
(04:27):
Transitions are hard foreveryone, but when you're in
recovery, they can feel evenmore overwhelming.
But really, why is that?
It's because our brains arewired to seek familiar patterns
and change disrupts thosepatterns.
So think about it.
For years, most of us usesubstances to cope with
(04:50):
uncertainty, stress and theunknown.
And then, when September rollsaround and suddenly everyone's
schedules change kids are backto school, work gets busier, or
when the seasons shift and ourenergy levels fluctuate, our
nervous system's can go intooverdrive your brain might start
sending those old, familiarsignals.
Like this is uncomfortable,this feels uncertain.
(05:13):
Remember what we used to dowith this feeling.
But here's the beautiful truthYou're not the same person you
were when you first got sober,and you have tools.
Now you have strength, andtoday I'm going to give you five
more.
So let's get into it.
Tool number one is thetransition ritual.
The first tool is creating whatI call a transition ritual.
(05:35):
This isn't about complicatedceremonies.
It's about intentionallymarking the change.
So when you're facing anytransition, I want you to take
10 minutes or, you know, in mycase, 10 hours or 10 days to
acknowledge what you're leavingbehind.
So it might just be things likethe summer routines or the nice
(05:57):
weather, or your kids home withyou, whatever it is.
Acknowledge that that thing.
And then I want you to identifythree things that you're
grateful for about the upcomingchange.
And then I want you to set oneclear intention for how you want
to show up during thistransition.
Personally, I do this everyseason change, every time my
(06:19):
kids go back to school, evenwhen I'm starting a new project,
or even the seasons.
It helps my brain to processthe change and stop resisting it
so much.
So for me, I spent time beforeand after acknowledging what we
were leaving behind, which wasan incredible summer break
(06:41):
together.
We really really had so muchfun.
And then I noted three thingsthat I was grateful for with the
upcoming change.
One is the weather has beenincredible here.
It's been beautiful, with thecooler mornings and the cooler
evenings.
I'm grateful that we get totravel to visit the girls and
spend time with them in theirenvironment, and I'm grateful
(07:03):
that my son lets me make hislunch every day so I can kind of
sprinkle my love into his foodand let that speak to him.
So tool number two is the STOPtechnique.
It's an acronym, and whentransition anxiety hits.
I want you to really go to this.
Use this STOP acronym S is forstop what you're doing.
(07:26):
Just stop what you're doing.
T take three deep breaths Oobserve what you're feeling
without judgment that's the keyand P proceed with intention.
So this technique literallyrewires your brain's response to
stress and instead of those oldautopilot reactions you're
(07:47):
creating a new neuropathway, onethat leads to conscious choice
instead of reactive behavior.
So yesterday evening I couldfeel the anxiety building in my
body and it was kind ofunprompted.
There really wasn't anythinggoing on.
I was just home doing stuff andhonestly, what it was was
emotions.
It was just a lot of emotions,and it created me to start kind
(08:11):
of flitting around even morethan I normally am, to be maybe
a little snappy and on the vergeof tears.
And at one point I just stoppedwhat I was doing and I stood
still for a moment and I tookthree deep belly breaths in
through my nose and then slowlyout through my mouth.
I took note of what I wasfeeling right then.
(08:33):
So I observed that I wasfeeling sad, I was a little
lonely and truly I was justlonging for my kids, and then I
resisted the temptation to shutthat down or dismiss it or judge
myself for those feelings.
And then I intentionally stoodup.
I stood a little taller, Iforced my shoulders down and
(08:53):
back and then I looked at what Iwas already involved in and I
quickly made a plan for the restof the night.
So remember to use S-T-O-P Toolnumber three is the support
check-in.
Transitions are not the time toisolate.
Sometimes we want to, right, Iknow I do sometimes.
(09:14):
I want you to identify threepeople in your support network
right now and then scheduleregular check-ins with them over
the next two weeks.
So this could be your sponsor,a sober friend, a therapist or a
family member.
The key is I want you to beproactive.
I want you to have thesealready scheduled in.
Don't wait until you'restruggling or really already are
(09:37):
in isolation.
I want you to reach out whenyou're feeling good and create
those connection points.
These are literally justcheck-ins.
They don't have to be about you.
In fact, it's better if theyaren't, frankly.
So those three people out ofthe three people, some of them
can be people in your life thatyou know are going through a
really hard time or people thatcould really use some
(09:58):
encouragement.
So, for example, I have a verydear friend that is going
through a big marital crisisright now and I have been
intentionally checking in withher just to see how she's doing
and she's also one of my supportpeople.
But I wanted to show her somelove and so I did that again
yesterday, just to kind of checkin and schedule a phone call to
(10:21):
get an update and to see howshe's doing.
And then you can also have thatone or maybe two people that
you share the full-on truth with.
You want to make sure those arepeople that you know you can
trust with your story.
Tool number four is the energyaudit.
Transitions can be a realenergy drain, so during
transitions, our energy oftengets really scattered.
(10:44):
So I want you to do what I callan energy audit.
Some of you may have heard theterm back to basics, and that's
what this is.
So during times of transitionand high stress, you have to
focus on only the things thatare absolutely necessary, only
the things that have to be done.
So things like feeding yourselfproperly, getting to work on
(11:05):
time, making sure your kids areclean and fed and they get to
school, getting adequate sleep,moving your body regularly just
really the basics of life.
This is not the time to bepicking up a new hobby or
starting a home renovation orengaging with a lot of friends
socially or trying to changesomething really big about your
(11:25):
health.
So I want you to list all thethings that are demanding your
energy right now Work changes,school schedules, relationship
dynamics, even seasonaldepression, if that's part of
your story and starting to creepin.
And then I want you to askyourself what can I eliminate or
delegate?
I want you to really think hardabout the delegation part and
(11:49):
think about, for example, whatyour kids can do.
So your kids can do their ownlaundry, starting in middle
school.
They can pack their own lunches.
Your partner could possiblypick up a different chore or a
specific task that you couldreally use some help with, and
this doesn't have to be forever,it can just be for a specific
time period.
And this doesn't have to beforever, it can just be for a
specific time period.
(12:09):
And I want to also list outwhat needs my full attention.
So things like your recovery,your sleep, your kids, your
health.
What am I doing out of habitthat no longer serves me?
Things that I could probablylet go.
I don't need to be doing.
Be ruthless here.
(12:30):
Your recovery depends on youprotecting your energy like the
precious resource it is, andtool number five is the nervous
system reset.
Here's that absolutelyrevolutionary thing I have added
in my practice that you couldutilize as well to understand
more about your own nervoussystem and then to train your
(12:51):
brain.
Many women in recovery aredealing with dysregulated
nervous systems.
Years of substance use, traumaand stress have literally
rewired our brains, andtraditional therapy is great.
Obviously, I am a mental healththerapist and traditional
therapy is great.
Obviously, I am a mental healththerapist.
(13:12):
I use EMDR therapy.
It's amazing.
But sometimes we need even morethan what traditional therapy
can provide, or we need it to bedone in a different way, and
that's where remoteneurofeedback therapy comes in,
and I'm incredibly excited to beable to offer this to the women
in my community.
Neurofeedback therapy is likegoing to the gym for your brain.
It's a non-invasive therapythat uses real-time brainwave
(13:34):
activity monitoring to teachyour brain how to regulate
itself more effectively.
So we're talking about actuallyretraining your brain's
responses to stress, anxiety andeven triggers, and what makes
my remote program so powerful isthat you can do this from your
own home.
You get to train your brainliterally from your couch or
your bed or your car or wherever.
(13:56):
No more driving to appointments, no more scheduling around work
and family.
You get the same incredibleresults with the convenience and
privacy you deserve.
So I've watched women go fromhaving panic attacks during
their kids' school pickup tofeeling calm and centered.
I've seen clients who used tohave three glasses of wine in
(14:21):
order to handle work stressnavigate the challenges of life
with clarity and confidence, andthe best part is the brain
starts learning new patternsimmediately.
Most of my clients noticechanges within the first few
sessions.
So let's do a quick recap ofyour transition toolkit.
Number one is to createtransition rituals Think,
(14:44):
acknowledge gratitude andintention.
Number two is use the stoptechnique.
Stop what you're doing, takethree deep breaths, observe what
you're feeling without judgment.
Proceed with intention.
Number three is schedulesupport check-ins.
Have three people that youregularly check in with and can
(15:05):
talk to, even before you're in achallenge.
Number four is audit yourenergy, think back to basics,
focusing only on what needs tobe done immediately.
Number five is consider nervoussystem work.
Let's talk about implementingthat remote neurofeedback
therapy program.
Now, these aren't just copingskills, these are life skills
(15:28):
that will serve you in everytransition you face.
If you're listening to this andthinking, I need more support
for my nervous system, so I wantyou to know that help is
available.
My remote neurofeedback therapyprogram is appropriate for
anyone who wants to use it, butit specifically does help women
in recovery who are ready totake their healing to the next
(15:50):
level.
And one of the best thingsabout it is it's not under our
licensure, so it can be usedacross state lines and we're not
bound by those same things thattraditional therapy has us
bound.
You don't have to keep fightingthe same battles with anxiety,
sleep issues, emotionalreactivity, adhd, depression.
(16:15):
Your brain has incrediblecapacity for change.
Neuroplasticity is real andit's never too late to create
new patterns.
I am currently accepting newclients for my remote
neurofeedback therapy programand I would love to talk with
you about how this could becomepart of your recovery toolkit.
It's a wonderful opportunityfor you, for your family and for
(16:39):
your peace.
You can find more informationabout neurofeedback therapy on
my website, shelbyjohncom.
You can even schedule a freeconsultation there if you'd like
to talk a little bit more andget in depth about it.
I'll put that link in the shownotes below.
You can also reach out to medirectly on social media.
So remember, sober ladies,transitions don't have to derail
(17:00):
your recovery or your life.
With the right tools andsupport, they can actually
become opportunities for growthand increased confidence.
They can actually becomeopportunities for growth and
increased confidence.
You've already proven you cando hard things.
You got sober and you'vemaintained your recovery through
challenges before I know youhave.
You have everything it takes tothrive through whatever
transition you're facing rightnow.
(17:23):
Thank you so much for joining metoday on the Confident Sober
Women podcast.
If this episode resonated withyou, please share it with
another woman who might need tohear this message.
And remember you're not justsurviving in recovery, you're
thriving.
I'll see you next week withanother episode designed to
support you on this incrediblejourney.
Until then, stay confident andremember that sobriety is only
(17:47):
the beginning.
See you next time.
Thank you for joining me forthis week's episode of Confident
Sober Women.
If you enjoyed thisconversation, hit the subscribe
button above so you won't missany upcoming episodes.
And hey, if you really loved it, leave me a review.
You can learn more about theSober Freedom Inner Circle
(18:09):
membership atwwwshelbyjohncoachingcom.
Forward slash inner circle.
See you next time.
Hello and welcome to the Confident Sober Women
podcast.
I'm your guide, shelby John.
I'm the mother of three, wifeto one and sober since July 1st
2002.
As sober women, we havesomething huge in common, and
when we share our lives and ourstories with each other, we feel
that sense of belonging andconnection.
(00:30):
So we know we are no longeralone.
In this podcast you will hearreal life talk about building
confidence and transforming yourlife beyond recovery.
So come on, let's talk recovery.
So come on, let's talk.
Hey, it's me, shelby.
(00:50):
Have you ever wondered what'sreally happening in your brain
during recovery?
Are you ready to take controlof your anxiety, sleep better
and finally feel focused andconfident?
I want to introduce you to agame changer that's transforming
women's recovery remoteneurofeedback therapy.
I want you to a game changerthat's transforming women's
recovery Remote neurofeedbacktherapy.
I want you to think of this asa personal trainer for your
brain.
It's helping you build newneuropathways right from the
(01:14):
comfort of your own home.
So if you're dealing withanxiety that just won't quit, if
you have ADHD that's makinglife chaotic or sleep issues
that leave you exhausted,neurofeedback could be your
missing piece.
It's science-backed braintraining that works with your
natural healing process, helpingyou regulate emotions and build
(01:37):
lasting confidence.
The best part is, you don'tneed to add another appointment
to your busy schedule.
My remote neurofeedback programbrings professional guidance
and support right to your livingroom.
Do you want to learn more aboutneurofeedback therapy?
You can go to my website,wwwshelbyjohncom to download my
(01:58):
free guide.
Is Neurofeedback Right for you?
Together, we'll create the calm, confident future you that you
deserve.
That's wwwshelbyjohncom.
Take the first step towardstraining your brain for lasting
change.
Well, hey there, sober ladies,thank you so much for joining me
today for the Confident, soberWomen podcast, where we are
(02:20):
creating a movement of powerful,wisdom-seeking women who are
building lives of confidence,joy and profound personal
enlightenment beyond initialrecovery.
I'm your host, shelby John, andevery week we have empowering
conversations to help you builda life you don't want to escape
(02:41):
from, because we all knowsobriety is only the beginning,
and today we're talking aboutsomething that can catch even
the strongest woman in recoveryoff guard, and that is
transition times.
Of course, we are in the backto school rush that's happening
right now.
There's also the shift fromsummer to fall, and there might
(03:04):
even be other major life changesor transitions that are causing
you to feel emotional landminesand can create some unrest for
those of us in recovery.
I know in my own life wetransitioned our two daughters
back to college and my son,who's the youngest, is a senior
in high school, and so thatmeans at the end of this year we
(03:24):
will have two graduates.
And to say this has been anemotional time is a bit of an
understatement for me.
I find myself tearing up atrandom times, not able to keep
their bedroom doors open, andeven spending excess money on
Amazon to contribute to my quoteunquote making things era,
(03:46):
which I'm branding as a newcoping skill.
So I say all of that to let youknow that I'm right there, in
it with you and staying sober,one day at a time through it all
.
But here's what I want you toknow that right from the start,
you don't have to white knuckleyour way through these
challenging times.
Today, I want to share with youfive practical tools you can
start using immediately.
(04:07):
Plus, then, I'm going to tellyou about a game changing
resource that's beentransforming lives in my
practice, including my ownremote neurofeedback therapy.
So let's first ask the questionwhy do transitions trigger us so
much in recovery?
And I want to get real for amoment.
(04:27):
Transitions are hard foreveryone, but when you're in
recovery, they can feel evenmore overwhelming.
But really, why is that?
It's because our brains arewired to seek familiar patterns
and change disrupts thosepatterns.
So think about it.
For years, most of us usesubstances to cope with
(04:50):
uncertainty, stress and theunknown.
And then, when September rollsaround and suddenly everyone's
schedules change kids are backto school, work gets busier, or
when the seasons shift and ourenergy levels fluctuate, our
nervous system's can go intooverdrive your brain might start
sending those old, familiarsignals.
Like this is uncomfortable,this feels uncertain.
(05:13):
Remember what we used to dowith this feeling.
But here's the beautiful truthYou're not the same person you
were when you first got sober,and you have tools.
Now you have strength, andtoday I'm going to give you five
more.
So let's get into it.
Tool number one is thetransition ritual.
The first tool is creating whatI call a transition ritual.
(05:35):
This isn't about complicatedceremonies.
It's about intentionallymarking the change.
So when you're facing anytransition, I want you to take
10 minutes or, you know, in mycase, 10 hours or 10 days to
acknowledge what you're leavingbehind.
So it might just be things likethe summer routines or the nice
(05:57):
weather, or your kids home withyou, whatever it is.
Acknowledge that that thing.
And then I want you to identifythree things that you're
grateful for about the upcomingchange.
And then I want you to set oneclear intention for how you want
to show up during thistransition.
Personally, I do this everyseason change, every time my
(06:19):
kids go back to school, evenwhen I'm starting a new project,
or even the seasons.
It helps my brain to processthe change and stop resisting it
so much.
So for me, I spent time beforeand after acknowledging what we
were leaving behind, which wasan incredible summer break
(06:41):
together.
We really really had so muchfun.
And then I noted three thingsthat I was grateful for with the
upcoming change.
One is the weather has beenincredible here.
It's been beautiful, with thecooler mornings and the cooler
evenings.
I'm grateful that we get totravel to visit the girls and
spend time with them in theirenvironment, and I'm grateful
(07:03):
that my son lets me make hislunch every day so I can kind of
sprinkle my love into his foodand let that speak to him.
So tool number two is the STOPtechnique.
It's an acronym, and whentransition anxiety hits.
I want you to really go to this.
Use this STOP acronym S is forstop what you're doing.
(07:26):
Just stop what you're doing.
T take three deep breaths Oobserve what you're feeling
without judgment that's the keyand P proceed with intention.
So this technique literallyrewires your brain's response to
stress and instead of those oldautopilot reactions you're
(07:47):
creating a new neuropathway, onethat leads to conscious choice
instead of reactive behavior.
So yesterday evening I couldfeel the anxiety building in my
body and it was kind ofunprompted.
There really wasn't anythinggoing on.
I was just home doing stuff andhonestly, what it was was
emotions.
It was just a lot of emotions,and it created me to start kind
(08:11):
of flitting around even morethan I normally am, to be maybe
a little snappy and on the vergeof tears.
And at one point I just stoppedwhat I was doing and I stood
still for a moment and I tookthree deep belly breaths in
through my nose and then slowlyout through my mouth.
I took note of what I wasfeeling right then.
(08:33):
So I observed that I wasfeeling sad, I was a little
lonely and truly I was justlonging for my kids, and then I
resisted the temptation to shutthat down or dismiss it or judge
myself for those feelings.
And then I intentionally stoodup.
I stood a little taller, Iforced my shoulders down and
(08:53):
back and then I looked at what Iwas already involved in and I
quickly made a plan for the restof the night.
So remember to use S-T-O-P Toolnumber three is the support
check-in.
Transitions are not the time toisolate.
Sometimes we want to, right, Iknow I do sometimes.
(09:14):
I want you to identify threepeople in your support network
right now and then scheduleregular check-ins with them over
the next two weeks.
So this could be your sponsor,a sober friend, a therapist or a
family member.
The key is I want you to beproactive.
I want you to have thesealready scheduled in.
Don't wait until you'restruggling or really already are
(09:37):
in isolation.
I want you to reach out whenyou're feeling good and create
those connection points.
These are literally justcheck-ins.
They don't have to be about you.
In fact, it's better if theyaren't, frankly.
So those three people out ofthe three people, some of them
can be people in your life thatyou know are going through a
really hard time or people thatcould really use some
(09:58):
encouragement.
So, for example, I have a verydear friend that is going
through a big marital crisisright now and I have been
intentionally checking in withher just to see how she's doing
and she's also one of my supportpeople.
But I wanted to show her somelove and so I did that again
yesterday, just to kind of checkin and schedule a phone call to
(10:21):
get an update and to see howshe's doing.
And then you can also have thatone or maybe two people that
you share the full-on truth with.
You want to make sure those arepeople that you know you can
trust with your story.
Tool number four is the energyaudit.
Transitions can be a realenergy drain, so during
transitions, our energy oftengets really scattered.
(10:44):
So I want you to do what I callan energy audit.
Some of you may have heard theterm back to basics, and that's
what this is.
So during times of transitionand high stress, you have to
focus on only the things thatare absolutely necessary, only
the things that have to be done.
So things like feeding yourselfproperly, getting to work on
(11:05):
time, making sure your kids areclean and fed and they get to
school, getting adequate sleep,moving your body regularly just
really the basics of life.
This is not the time to bepicking up a new hobby or
starting a home renovation orengaging with a lot of friends
socially or trying to changesomething really big about your
(11:25):
health.
So I want you to list all thethings that are demanding your
energy right now Work changes,school schedules, relationship
dynamics, even seasonaldepression, if that's part of
your story and starting to creepin.
And then I want you to askyourself what can I eliminate or
delegate?
I want you to really think hardabout the delegation part and
(11:49):
think about, for example, whatyour kids can do.
So your kids can do their ownlaundry, starting in middle
school.
They can pack their own lunches.
Your partner could possiblypick up a different chore or a
specific task that you couldreally use some help with, and
this doesn't have to be forever,it can just be for a specific
time period.
And this doesn't have to beforever, it can just be for a
specific time period.
(12:09):
And I want to also list outwhat needs my full attention.
So things like your recovery,your sleep, your kids, your
health.
What am I doing out of habitthat no longer serves me?
Things that I could probablylet go.
I don't need to be doing.
Be ruthless here.
(12:30):
Your recovery depends on youprotecting your energy like the
precious resource it is, andtool number five is the nervous
system reset.
Here's that absolutelyrevolutionary thing I have added
in my practice that you couldutilize as well to understand
more about your own nervoussystem and then to train your
(12:51):
brain.
Many women in recovery aredealing with dysregulated
nervous systems.
Years of substance use, traumaand stress have literally
rewired our brains, andtraditional therapy is great.
Obviously, I am a mental healththerapist and traditional
therapy is great.
Obviously, I am a mental healththerapist.
(13:12):
I use EMDR therapy.
It's amazing.
But sometimes we need even morethan what traditional therapy
can provide, or we need it to bedone in a different way, and
that's where remoteneurofeedback therapy comes in,
and I'm incredibly excited to beable to offer this to the women
in my community.
Neurofeedback therapy is likegoing to the gym for your brain.
It's a non-invasive therapythat uses real-time brainwave
(13:34):
activity monitoring to teachyour brain how to regulate
itself more effectively.
So we're talking about actuallyretraining your brain's
responses to stress, anxiety andeven triggers, and what makes
my remote program so powerful isthat you can do this from your
own home.
You get to train your brainliterally from your couch or
your bed or your car or wherever.
(13:56):
No more driving to appointments, no more scheduling around work
and family.
You get the same incredibleresults with the convenience and
privacy you deserve.
So I've watched women go fromhaving panic attacks during
their kids' school pickup tofeeling calm and centered.
I've seen clients who used tohave three glasses of wine in
(14:21):
order to handle work stressnavigate the challenges of life
with clarity and confidence, andthe best part is the brain
starts learning new patternsimmediately.
Most of my clients noticechanges within the first few
sessions.
So let's do a quick recap ofyour transition toolkit.
Number one is to createtransition rituals Think,
(14:44):
acknowledge gratitude andintention.
Number two is use the stoptechnique.
Stop what you're doing, takethree deep breaths, observe what
you're feeling without judgment.
Proceed with intention.
Number three is schedulesupport check-ins.
Have three people that youregularly check in with and can
(15:05):
talk to, even before you're in achallenge.
Number four is audit yourenergy, think back to basics,
focusing only on what needs tobe done immediately.
Number five is consider nervoussystem work.
Let's talk about implementingthat remote neurofeedback
therapy program.
Now, these aren't just copingskills, these are life skills
(15:28):
that will serve you in everytransition you face.
If you're listening to this andthinking, I need more support
for my nervous system, so I wantyou to know that help is
available.
My remote neurofeedback therapyprogram is appropriate for
anyone who wants to use it, butit specifically does help women
in recovery who are ready totake their healing to the next
(15:50):
level.
And one of the best thingsabout it is it's not under our
licensure, so it can be usedacross state lines and we're not
bound by those same things thattraditional therapy has us
bound.
You don't have to keep fightingthe same battles with anxiety,
sleep issues, emotionalreactivity, adhd, depression.
(16:15):
Your brain has incrediblecapacity for change.
Neuroplasticity is real andit's never too late to create
new patterns.
I am currently accepting newclients for my remote
neurofeedback therapy programand I would love to talk with
you about how this could becomepart of your recovery toolkit.
It's a wonderful opportunityfor you, for your family and for
(16:39):
your peace.
You can find more informationabout neurofeedback therapy on
my website, shelbyjohncom.
You can even schedule a freeconsultation there if you'd like
to talk a little bit more andget in depth about it.
I'll put that link in the shownotes below.
You can also reach out to medirectly on social media.
So remember, sober ladies,transitions don't have to derail
(17:00):
your recovery or your life.
With the right tools andsupport, they can actually
become opportunities for growthand increased confidence.
They can actually becomeopportunities for growth and
increased confidence.
You've already proven you cando hard things.
You got sober and you'vemaintained your recovery through
challenges before I know youhave.
You have everything it takes tothrive through whatever
transition you're facing rightnow.
(17:23):
Thank you so much for joining metoday on the Confident Sober
Women podcast.
If this episode resonated withyou, please share it with
another woman who might need tohear this message.
And remember you're not justsurviving in recovery, you're
thriving.
I'll see you next week withanother episode designed to
support you on this incrediblejourney.
Until then, stay confident andremember that sobriety is only
(17:47):
the beginning.
See you next time.
Thank you for joining me forthis week's episode of Confident
Sober Women.
If you enjoyed thisconversation, hit the subscribe
button above so you won't missany upcoming episodes.
And hey, if you really loved it, leave me a review.
You can learn more about theSober Freedom Inner Circle
(18:09):
membership atwwwshelbyjohncoachingcom.
Forward slash inner circle.
See you next time.
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