What if there was a more profound way of expressing your emotions at work beyond just being "happy"? Let's get into a stimulating chat about harnessing and articulating emotions more accurately within the workplace. Drawing valuable insights from Mark Brackett's book, 'Permission to Feel,' we ponder upon the multi-layered emotions we experience in our professional lives, and how the term "happy," though commonly used, might not be doing full justice in describing those emotions.
We explore alternative words and phrases that go beyond happy - 'excited', 'joyful', 'appreciated', 'valued' and how they paint a more comprehensive picture of our emotional landscape at work. Also, we discuss the power of 'gratitude' as a tool for making others feel appreciated and valued. Plus, we share real-world strategies to incorporate and express these emotions during daily workplace interactions. This is a must-listen episode for anyone looking to enrich emotional communication at work. Join us to continue this riveting discussion on our substack, and make sure to check out our recommended reads in the description.
Laughter, Love, and Blessings,
Heather
Resources and links mentioned in this episode:
- Permission to Feel - Marc Brackett, Ph.D.
- Atlas of the Heart - Brene Brown Ph.D.
- Join the conversation on Substack: thepolkadotdesk.substack.com!
Social Links:
Episode Transcript
But emotions are the most powerful force inside the
workspace, as they are in everyhuman endeavor.
They influence everything fromleadership effectiveness to
building and maintaining complexrelationships, from innovation
to customer relations.
That's a quote from Permissionto Feel by Mark Brackett, phd.
(00:21):
Emotions Talking about emotionscan bring up a lot of emotions,
but broaching this subject inthe workplace can add another
layer of complexity to theconversation.
But it doesn't have to be thatway.
(00:42):
This mini-series will coverfive words or word categories
that we can start to bring intothe workplace to help
communicate our emotions in morespecific and helpful terms.
Hello and welcome.
To Connect the Dots, lead theWay.
I'm your host, heather Valseric.
I'm a white female with short,strawberry blonde hair.
(01:03):
I have on tortoise shellglasses and a blue shirt that
says Be Kind.
I'm sitting in front of a tealwall with multiple pieces of art
displayed.
Welcome to day one of thismini-series.
And today's word or wordcategory actually comes from Amy
Lawn.
She responded to my LinkedInpost asking for suggestions for
(01:25):
this series and she said Happyand All Versions, and I loved
that request right, like justthe word happy and in all
versions of that, and itreminded me of a study that Mark
Brackett talked about inpermission to feel, where they
(01:45):
asked subjects for three wordsto describe what they would most
like to feel at work, and happywas the number one choice.
He said it's like the defaultchoice, the one that we blurt
out with much thought.
But he goes on to talk aboutthe second and third responses,
(02:08):
which included words likeexcited, joyful, appreciated,
supported, fulfilled, respected,inspired, accomplished.
Valued also was another topchoice, and it was actually
mentioned twice as much by womenthan it was men.
And just thinking about this inthe word happy, right, as I
(02:34):
talk about this, right, it feelsgeneric.
It's the I'm fine or I'm doinggood of emotions.
Right, we say it, but do wereally mean it?
In Atlas of the Heart, brenéBrown defines happiness as the,
as the feeling of pleasure oftenrelated to immediate
(02:56):
environment or certaincircumstances, and this makes
this makes sense.
Right, that the happy is thedefault response.
It's the here and now.
But that wasn't what thequestion asked in the study.
They asked for three words todescribe what the subject would
(03:18):
most like to feel at work, andthat's why the second and third
responses were so importantExcited, joyful, appreciated,
valued.
These tell more of a story.
They tell different stories InBrené Brown's book Atlas of the
(03:42):
Heart.
You will find joy and happinessin the places we go when life is
good section.
She defines joy as an intensefeeling of deep spiritual
connection, pleasure andappreciation.
Finding connection with yourwork can absolutely bring you
(04:02):
joy.
Appreciation for the people andthe work that you do supports
that joyful feeling.
But how do we talk about thatat work?
Are you going to hop on a Zoommeeting next week and when
someone sees you and asks you,well, how's your project going?
Or are you going to be likewell, I'm filled with joy about
(04:22):
the project currently?
That would be weird.
You're definitely going to getsome weird looks on that, but
maybe we can introduce thefeeling like this you know the
project is going really well andthe team is pulled together to
overcome some last minutechanges.
It has been a joy to work withthis team so far.
(04:45):
We dug a little deeper there.
A few of the terms that werementioned in that study reminded
me of gratitude, right, thefeeling of appreciation and
being valued.
If someone shows or expressesgratitude, the other person
(05:09):
feels appreciated or valued.
Gratitude is another term in alist in places you go when life
is good, and she wrote.
Gratitude is an emotion thatreflects our deep appreciation
for what we value, what bringsmeaning to our lives and what
(05:30):
makes us feel connected toourselves and others.
In the workplace, we can helpothers feel appreciated and
valued by showing gratitude.
As a leader, you should bepracticing gratitude, showing it
to your team, to your peers, toyour leader.
Honestly, really, we all do.
(05:53):
There's no leader titlerequired there.
So how do you bring gratitudeinto the workplace?
Well, we can thank people, wecan tell them what we're
grateful for about them, but isthat going to go far?
Why not?
So when you're showinggratitude, it needs to be
(06:17):
genuine, it needs to be real.
Get to know that person andexpress gratitude in the way
that is meaningful to them.
So the word happy in theworkplace.
Should we use the word happy?
Absolutely, there is a time andplace for the word happy.
But next time you start toanswer a question with a version
(06:39):
of well, I'm happy or I'm happywith it, maybe work to go a
little deeper.
Does it bring you joy?
Does it make you grateful?
Do you feel valued or excited?
I would love to know what wordsyou would use instead of happy
in the workplace.
So head over to my sub stackwith the link in the description
(07:01):
to comment.
Let's continue thatconversation there and make sure
that you check out the links inthe description to learn more
about Mark Brackett's bookpermission to feel and Brene
Brown's book Atlas of the Heart.
Those are two books that youwill hear me talk about in all
episodes this week, so if youwant to check those out, links
(07:22):
are below.
I'll be back tomorrow with morewords for the workplace.
Until then, remember that youare loved, you are worthy and
there are great things ahead foryou in this life if you trust
and believe in the Lord.
Bye, thanks for watching.
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