August 13, 2024 • 39 mins
This week’s episode offers a refreshingly candid and insightful look into the life of a young Zoomer (Gen Z), you get to meet and listen to my oldest daughter, Mackenzie, as she navigates the challenges and joys of living in the bustling city of Washington, D.C. Kristen Daukas, Mackenzie's mother and the host of the podcast, skillfully guides the conversation, exploring topics ranging from the financial realities of homeownership for Gen Z, to the social media-driven pressures of modern relationships and celebrations.
Throughout the discussion, Mackenzie's perspective shines through as she shares her experiences with the demands of her career, the camaraderie of her close-knit group of friends, and the bittersweet feelings of leaving her hometown behind. Kristen's empathetic approach and genuine interest in understanding her daughter's generation create a warm and engaging dialogue, inviting listeners to gain a deeper appreciation for the unique perspectives and experiences of young adults today.
The episode serves as a testament to the power of open and honest communication between generations and the importance of embracing the diverse paths that define the modern coming-of-age journey. By doing so, we can all gain a deeper understanding and appreciation for each generation's unique experiences and perspectives.
Interested in possibly being a guest on the show? Click the link to get started!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kristen Daukas (00:00):
Kristen, welcome to Conversations on the rocks,
(00:06):
the podcast where the drink isstrong and the stories are
stronger. I'm your host, Kristendaukas, and this isn't your
average chat fest. Here. Realpeople spill the tea alongside
their favorite drinks, from thehilarious to the heart
wrenching. Each episode a wildcard, you'll laugh, you may cry,
but you'll definitely learnsomething new. So grab whatever,
(00:26):
what's your whistle and buckleup. It's time to dive into the
raw, the real and theridiculously human. Let's get
this chat party started. Heyeverybody, it's Kristen, and you
are tuned in to this week'sepisode of conversations on the
rocks, and the last episode Ihad Jen, my bestie, my bestest
(00:48):
bestie in the world. Becauseremember I said, if you think
you've got the bestest bestie,you're wrong. But today I have a
very well it is actually anunexpected guest, because when
she said that she wanted to dothis. I was gobsmacked, because
she was vehemently against it.
And whereas I had my best friendon before, I have on a young
lady who gave me the title ofmom, I have my oldest beautiful
(01:12):
daughter, Mackenzie, and I'm soexcited that she's here.
Mackenzie, tell everybody? Hey,
Unknown (01:21):
hi,
Kristen Daukas (01:24):
normally, she won't shut up, and now she's
gonna give me one word answers.
Unknown (01:27):
Yeah, sure. Why
Kristen Daukas (01:29):
don't you? Why don't you tell everybody a
little bit about yourself?
Unknown (01:33):
Okay, I'm 25 years old.
I live in DC with like 10 peopleI know from my hometown, which
is insane. I am a catering salesmanager at a large convention
hotel in DC, and I have a littleside gig being like a host,
bartender, top master kind ofdeal. Yeah. I mean, just living
(01:56):
my life in DC, she's living
Kristen Daukas (02:01):
her best life, and what we're going to be
talking about today is hergeneration. And if you know me,
or if you've listened to thisshow and don't know me, you know
that I am a huge, huge advocatefor Gen Z. I am a Gen Xer, and
for the most part, Gen Xersbirthed the Gen Z and they get a
(02:22):
lot of crap. They really do. Andyou know, I was talking to a
friend who when I told her I wasgoing to be interviewing you,
and I'm actually going to bedoing this the entire month of
August. So my entire month ofAugust shows are with Gen Z,
ers, one of Mackenzie's friendsis going to sit in the hot seat
here in a couple of weeks. Andmy friend said, Why don't you
(02:44):
ask them why they don't want towork? And I said, Hold on,
that's absolutely not true. Arethere some out there that don't
want to absolutely but everysingle Gen Z or I know, busts
their ass and they do it.
Because, why? Mackenzie? I mean,we have no choice. You have to
because one of the things I wantyou to talk about is your
(03:08):
perspective of, you, know, yourfuture. I've said it before, and
I truly it makes me very sad tomake this statement, but I
really, I just can't see the wayour world is right now, how you
and your sisters and any of yourfriends will ever own your own
house or a condo? I mean, I knowyou've got one friend that has
(03:31):
but that's just she's isn't she,like the only one of your
friends that has her own place
Unknown (03:38):
in DC, I have four friends that own, two own, or
three of them own in Virginia.
One owns in DC proper. I thinkit's two condos, a row house and
an actual house. And then I havea friend back at home who does
own a house in Boone. And
Kristen Daukas (03:58):
how does that make you feel? Do you think? Do
you think that you'll ever beable to own property?
Unknown (04:03):
I guess it depends on where I decide to like, settle,
to like, you know, have a familyand live for the majority of my
life. But if, situationallyspeaking, right now in DC,
absolutely not.
Kristen Daukas (04:17):
And how do you like big city living?
Unknown (04:19):
You know, I don't mind it. It's kind of crazy. You
know, going home from the barsat two in the morning and the
Uber you're looking out thewindow and you're seeing, like,
all these amazing monuments andlike, just like the city life
moving around. I definitely missNorth Carolina. I miss the
comfort, the Southern Comfort,literally. But I like it,
(04:41):
generally speaking, there's alot for me out here. There's a
lot of good opportunity, whichis why I moved here. But I mean,
you know, there's no place likehome, literally. So I would like
to live in maybe a more of ahybrid area, where they're a
little bit suburbia, a littlebit of city. So.
Kristen Daukas (05:00):
So you live in DC, and it is a very contentious
area. How did, how do I knowthat it makes me nervous, as
your mom having you live therewith all of the unrest, how do
you how do you feel about allthe political and things going
(05:23):
on there, the protests. Do youever feel not safe? What? What's
your take on that
Unknown (05:29):
with the protests? I never like feel unsafe because
of them. I do think whathappened this past week was
absolutely insane, and we thereshould be no place to that, and
this city or America in general,but where I actually like put my
head to rest, we don't haveprotesting over here, over by
(05:50):
where I work. We definitely haveprotests when we have certain
events and stuff. So I just haveto remember that I am safe due
to the security that we employ.
And DC police kind of have acontrol on things, but it's hard
to say, because you look atvideos from this past week, you
(06:14):
see people attacking the policeofficers, and they're not doing
much. They're not able to reallyarrest people, from my
understanding, it's kind of likea it's a no man's land when it
comes to that kind of stuff. Theonly time I feel like kind of
unsafe is probably like walkinghome at night, just what you're
(06:35):
not supposed to do. Yeah, that'swhy we have scooters and Ubers,
just because it can, I mean,it's there are crazy people
everywhere. I'm grateful I donot have a car with the car
jackings. It's
Kristen Daukas (06:53):
everywhere. I mean, obviously in your more
populous areas, you're going tohear about it more often, but it
happens here in Winston. I mean,you know that you lived here,
you grew you know you grew uphere. Let's talk a little bit
about the technology you beingfrom the 20th century, and not
the 21st century. Yeah, shestill has, she's a 19 you did
(07:18):
not, you know, you're not thatyou can really remember your
first couple of years, but forthe most part, a lot of people
in your generation have nevernot known technology, right,
right? And you know your yourlittle sister, she definitely, I
mean, by that point, we hadiPads and laptops and stuff like
that. You not so much. We didn'thave an iPad when you were
(07:40):
little, but that didn't stop youfrom watching Blues Clues and
all those other fun shows in thePower Puff Girls, but it was,
you know, with my background,you guys knew that I was always
a little ahead of the curve withyou and your friends, right?
However, there were alwayslittle situations. How do you
(08:01):
think growing up in the middleof social media and all that
technology? Do you think? Andyou know, there's a lot going on
right now on legislation wherethey're trying to really make it
illegal for anyone under 13 tohave social media. What's your
take on how that impacted yougrowing up, and the friendships
and the relationships that youhad.
Unknown (08:21):
I mean, like in middle school, I remember becoming
friends with people on Facebookthat were friends of friends,
which then blossomed into actualfriendships. I met one of my
closest friends through likeInstagram or Facebook, and then
we didn't even go to the sameschool. And then the next year,
(08:42):
when we were high school, we metlike, we were hanging out, and
like, became super close justbecause of social media. So I
mean, I think it's nice forbridging gaps between friend
groups and like, you know,friends of friends. So I mean, I
think, I mean 13, I mean, Iguess that makes sense, but that
was more so for I feel likepeople like my generation, and
(09:04):
not the younger people, becausenow, like these young kids are
doing things at like 11 yearsold that I was doing at like
1314, years old. So I mean,Tiktok has taken everyone by
storm. You see these people onthere and you're like, oh my
gosh, they're like, 11 yearsold, doing these crazy Tiktok
dances, whatever. So, I mean, wedefinitely didn't have
Kristen Daukas (09:28):
that. What about the negative side of it, like
the cyberbullying, um, I
Unknown (09:32):
mean, we had this one platform called Ask fm, which
you could, like, send peoplequestions anonymously or put
their put your name, but it wasmore anonymously, and that was,
that was probably the worst itcould have been for cyber
bullying. I think if you'retalking like random people cyber
(09:53):
bullying, then like you'relooking at like Omegle and those
chat rooms and stuff. Of but Idon't think, like, for me, like
Instagram was really like acyber bullying platform. Twitter
was kind of rough. You get in aTwitter fight with somebody, and
(10:13):
everyone sees that stuff, andyou know, it's still out there
to this day, you don't go backand delete it. But I mean, then
I think the net, the biggestnegative impact that social
media has on us is on how welook and societal norms.
Kristen Daukas (10:31):
Let's talk about that. You know,
Unknown (10:33):
it's you see like the Kim Kardashians, the Kylie
Jenners on social media. You ofcourse, think they're beautiful
and want to look like them, butthen it's putting unrealistic
ideas into young women and youngmen's heads, that that's what
they have to look like to beaccepted by people, or
especially, you know, to like beliked by whoever they're desired
(10:57):
to be liked by. And it's it'ssad for sure, because you see
the eating disorders and themental health disorders come out
of that. I mean, we've all beenthere, been through it.
Kristen Daukas (11:09):
I and, you know, I have a real big soap box when
it comes to societal norms. AndI think one of the conversations
that I'm having with one of yourfriends is along the lines of,
you know, real relationships.
And you know, we have, we justfound out this week that,
apparently, if you are a cat, asingle cat lady, it's a bad
thing which you are. You're asingle, double cat lady,
Unknown (11:35):
two cats, with two cats.
Kristen Daukas (11:38):
And I think that that is just, there's so much
wrong with those statements andthose sentiments. And you know
that I'm a big but I want youguys to find someone you know,
well, first of all, you got tobe happy with yourself, right?
I've always talked to that, andif you you've got to make
yourself happy. You can't putthat job on somebody else. But
at the same time, you knowyou're not supposed to go
(12:00):
through your entire life alone,and it's always easier to have
somebody you know by your sideto support you. How do you and
then, oh, reminds me, I've gotanother question on this one
that kind of segue into this. Doyou feel pressured? Do you feel
pressured to be in arelationship? Do you want to be
in a relationship? I mean, howdo you feel about that? Do you
feel like society pressures youthat you're less than if you're
(12:23):
not in a relationship. I mean,obviously they, they do, you
know, if you're JD Vance, ifyou're not married with five
kids,
Unknown (12:32):
so I do not feel pressured by society to be
dating. Do I want to be in arelationship? Yeah, but, I mean,
that's just like, I feel likeeverybody wants someone so but
no, I don't feel pressured by Idon't feel pressured by society
to be in a relationship. I don'teven think I saw that comment
from him.
Kristen Daukas (12:52):
Oh yeah, it just, it was just a couple of
days ago. Yeah, that that's whyyou're seeing all the memes now,
of like, you know, the the timecover with Taylor with her cats.
And, you know, talking about thechildless cat lady, like, I
don't know, she's doing prettydamn good for herself to be a
childless cat lady.
Unknown (13:12):
She's, yeah, she's fine.
Kristen Daukas (13:15):
Oh no, gosh, we could talk about that for a
really long time. Okay, sospeaking of one of the
conversations with my friend whomade the why don't they want to
work comment, she just recentlyattended a wedding, and it just
kind of made my knee jerk, andI've asked you this. I love your
(13:36):
generation. You know that, butwhy are y'all so extra? Why are
you so extra and we'll just usethe birthdays as a thing. Why
can't you just go to the cornerbar and get drunk like we did?
Why do y'all have to take thesetrips? I mean, I love it. It's a
great adventure. I'm notjudging, but I'm like, you know,
if it's a, you know, 25 a fiveand an O, you know, those are
(13:58):
always big birthdays in my book,fives and O's. But like, I mean,
I don't call you out. You'redoing one for your 26 you're
going to New Orleans. I can'teven remember. I think I can
remember, I got drunk with myfriends. That's what I did for
my 26th birthday,
Unknown (14:12):
and that's what I'm doing for my 26th birthday, just
with different views and moremore fun. I don't know. I mean,
I am going to New Orleans for my26th birthday with a group of,
like 10 people, and we'restarting to potentially, maybe
have more people come. We'llsee. I don't know what it is. I
(14:34):
mean, only two out of the 10 ofus have ever been and everyone
is extremely excited. We're allvery excited. But, I mean, I
don't know it's, it's a veryspecific thing that's really
started happening since I movedto DC. It's just, I mean, if you
have the time to go and do it,then we're gonna go do it. I
(14:56):
mean, pretty much for everybirthday that we have, we are
renting out. Some sort of spaceat a bar or restaurant to
celebrate and then makinganother stop along the way
before we go home. But I mean,
Kristen Daukas (15:10):
you're making experiences that I mean, I'm
not. I'm not making judgingyourself.
Unknown (15:15):
You can always make more money, you can always make
more memories, and just live bythat and but, yeah, I mean, I've
had friends ask me to go toTulum for their birthdays. And,
you know, it's like, it's crazy,so, but I'm excited. So
Kristen Daukas (15:30):
maybe not the birthday, but let's talk about
the weddings and the engagementsand the honeymoons and the stuff
like that. Like, I mean, some ofthese young ladies, these brides
to be. They're freaking crazy. Imean, it is insane. How like
these bachelorette partiestrips? I mean, it's one thing
(15:50):
for a trip, but then, and youcould probably describe it
better than me, you know,there's outfits of the day.
There's got to be a color youcan't do. Talk a little bit
about that, because that ismadness to me.
Unknown (16:01):
I mean, I, I feel like, like, 10 years ago, obviously, I
was 15 years old, and I don'tknow if that was happening back
then, but I feel like it's likea recent thing to have the, you
know, the pink pony club event,the we're all wearing white, the
breads wearing black, or we'reall wearing tan. It's just, if
(16:24):
you think about it in adifferent way, it's kind of
helpful for outfits. So at leastyou know you're gonna have to
wear a very specific outfit whenevery single night. So there's
no oh, I don't know what I'mgonna wear. That's a good so I
see it that way, like for mywhat was it? My 25th 24th
(16:44):
birthday. My 24th birthday, Itold everybody to wear black,
which I have to interrupt
Kristen Daukas (16:50):
her real quick.
We thought that was going to bethe end of because she
introduced the entire family,meaning her dad and I, to the
concept of a golden birthday.
Now it pretty much ticked all ofher sisters off because
Mackenzie explain what a goldenbirthday is. A
Unknown (17:04):
golden birthday is when you turn your age on the day you
were born. So for me, I was bornon September 24 and I was
turning 24 on the 24th and itwas a Saturday. So of course, we
had a huge party. And I wasenjoying birthday party,
actually, with one of my friendsthat I used to work at the bar
with, and it was both of ourgolden birthdays. So of course,
(17:25):
we had to go all out, but goldeneverybody
Kristen Daukas (17:28):
else in the family missed it. I guess my
golden birthday was when Iturned 17. Your dad was when he
turned five. Poor Cassie, she'sthe one closest. I mean, she had
hers when she was four, and yourSydney was when she turned 14.
But apparently, for those of usthat are Gen X, there is an
opportunity for us at somepoint, if we stay alive that
long. And what is that? Ourplatinum birthday? What's it
(17:53):
called?
Unknown (17:53):
I would assume so, or like, silver birthday,
Kristen Daukas (17:56):
but Silver's less than gold. We're gonna say
platinum. It's
Unknown (18:01):
when you turn the age on the year.
Kristen Daukas (18:04):
So if I can make it to 68 I'm having a platinum
birthday party, and y'all areall invited.
Unknown (18:09):
I highly doubt I'm gonna see 2098 but
Kristen Daukas (18:13):
you had yours, you're able to to embrace it. So
I guess that means so Sid's gotto make it to Can't she can't
even do it. She can't, she'sshe's screwed. She was born in
2001 she screwed Cassie too. Soyour dad and I are the only ones
that have any chance left. But Ido, I do agree with you on the
(18:37):
fact of it does help forplanning. It just seems so bossy
to me. There just seems like awhole lot of bossiness. And I
shouldn't say that word, becausethat's not, that's really, that
has a bad connotation. Therejust seems like a lot of
demands. Maybe that's not bossy.
It's very demanding on and it'snot the bride that's really
orchestrating this. It's hermaid of honor, or, you know, her
(18:59):
bridesmaids that are kind oforchestrating this, but I think
it's demanding.
Unknown (19:04):
I mean it, I agree, but I think it only if you're not
giving me enough heads up, likeif you text me three days before
your wedding or before yourbachelorette, that you want me
to have seven different outfitsper theme, response. But if you
(19:25):
were dressing in all black, ifyou asked me four months
beforehand, that's completelydifferent story. You've given me
more than enough time to putaside money to do it, you know,
buy pieces here and there. Like,figure out what I'm going to
execute on that, and I feel likethat's appropriate, but I also
think it's not like, this iswhat we're doing. It's how do
(19:47):
you guys feel about doing this?
Like, if you ask me how I feelabout doing pink pony club on
Friday night, and I'm like, Oh,that's a great idea. And half
the other girls are like, No, Idon't want to do that. Then,
like, you need to also. Listento your audience.
Kristen Daukas (20:01):
What is pink?
What is the, what's the pinkpony club?
Unknown (20:05):
It's like chapel Ron's thing. Like, just pink. Pink
Pony Club. Like cowgirl,sparkly. Okay, all right, space,
cowgirl, without the space. So Idon't know, but it could be, it
could be worse. There could itcould be Bridezilla esque. And
(20:29):
if you think about it, thesetrips are just photo
opportunities. True. They reallyare. They're fun. They're fun. I
went on a bachelorette in June,and it was so much fun. It was
like a cabin kind of weekend. Wewent to the middle of North
Carolina and had the best timeever. And we had, like, I think
(20:50):
we did, like, like a kind of,like a country redneck kind of
vibe. And then the other onewas, like, super girly, like
cottage core fairy kind of deal.
And I luckily had some stuff,and was able to borrow some
stuff from a friend. But then wedid the T shirts where all of
(21:11):
our faces were on it. So insteadof one of the themes, the bride
gave us all t shirts with ourfaces on it. And it was super
cool. So, I mean, if all, Idon't know how I would probably
react to, like, a super, like,intense, strict voucher, having
that been my first one, andbeing a being as great as it
(21:33):
was, right, I hope they're,
Kristen Daukas (21:38):
I hope they're all like that. They're not going
to be. You know that. And I knowsome of your I know some of your
friends, so I can guarantee youthey're not going to be like
that. How much are these girlsspending on not the one that you
just went to, but you know, Iknow plenty of your other
friends have been to the reallycrazy bachelorette type
weekends. That's that's a lot ofmoney. You guys are money that
you don't have. I might add,
Unknown (21:59):
yeah, credit cards are great credit but they're not
right. They are in thosesituations when you have to,
like, drop a lot at one time,right? Trying to think of anyone
that I know that's been on aintense voucher at
Kristen Daukas (22:22):
that's all right, that's all right.
Unknown (22:27):
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Kristen Daukas (22:55):
So let me ask you this, what are, what would
you say are some of the biggestchallenges that your generation
faces. You know, whether it'seconomic, social, environmental,
what are some of the biggestissues that you think that
you're having to your group'shaving to deal with? We can we
kind of touched on money?
Unknown (23:11):
Definitely, money.
Yeah, for sure. And then also,like,
for me right now, like you weresaying, we hate to work. I hate
working, but it's like somethingthat we just have to do, like
(23:31):
you said, we just have to do itlike and the people we are
working for do not want to adaptto society. They don't want to
change. They don't want to bemodern. They like
Kristen Daukas (23:47):
these. Talk about that. Talk about that.
What do you mean?
Unknown (23:52):
These corporate companies are unaware that, like
we know that there are othercompanies that we can go and
work for that, adapt to likethat, work from home, that flux,
this flux schedule. I'm notsaying like we all want work
from home jobs, but we want theability to be able to work from
home without it being an issue.
And I feel like, after covid,you know, work from home was
(24:15):
huge, and then everyone waslike, screw that. We're going
back to in office seven days orfive days a week. Like, you have
to be there for X amount ofhours, and it's hard, you know,
some people have kids, somepeople have other jobs. Some
people like, they have, youknow, like, if you have an
appointment, I have to, youstill have to go into work, and
(24:37):
then you have to leave early.
And then you're, you're like,This is not, this is not
conducive to my lifestyle.
Pretty much, it's not
Kristen Daukas (24:47):
conducive to living. Is? It's very true. I
mean, I think about the factthat, you know, I'm not gonna
say I'm blessed because I workedmy ass off to work for myself,
right? Absolutely. But I knowfor sure that I would not be
able to do things like i. Hey,I'm going up Wednesday to Sunday
to visit you, right? And I'mstill working. I mean, you've
seen that. What you know, I'mworking. I'm working in the
(25:07):
morning so, and I agree withyou, especially, even in your
position, which is a very onsite position, there's no reason
why you can't work from home twodays a week, exactly, you know,
I'm not saying every day,because it's very, it is a very
hands on thing, and definitelynot days where you have events,
that's, I mean, but you have, Idon't think they give you guys
enough credit to be able to, youknow, use that. Remember when I
(25:29):
was talking sometimes my biggestfrustration with Gen Z is the
lack of critical thinking. YouYou made the comment that you
weren't even sure what thatmeant. That's critical thinking.
That's saying, Okay, I've,here's my schedule this week. I
have, you know, I've got officework on this day and this day I
don't need to be in the office.
However, I've got a big event onTuesday and Thursday. That's
(25:49):
critical thinking. That's going,you know, just taking an
overview. And I you girls are mygirls. You my my three hens are
very good with criticalthinking, but you were raised by
me, right? There are definitelysome of your generation that you
just go, what are you thinking?
Because you're not and what, andI've often said to one of my
(26:11):
other little ribs with Gen Z, isyour lack of sense of urgency,
right? So, but I think that'smore of a Kristen thing, because
I'm just like, go, go, go, go,go, all the time. And you know,
you guys have a differentapproach. So let's talk a little
bit about your approach to workand life balance. And you know,
(26:34):
you work to pay your bills,which most of us do. But I just,
and I'm, I'm happy for y'allthat you recognize that it's
like the person I told you. Itold you I ran into yesterday
that you went to school with.
One of the things I said, Isaid, good for you for
recognizing that being ateacher, which was causing her
so much stress, it was affectingher mentally and physically. I
(26:57):
said, good for you for honoringyourself. Whereas my parents
would have been like, you stay,you stay. You got to work, work,
work, work, work. You know,unless you've got like, 105
degree temperature, you go in.
Unknown (27:12):
See, that's the thing.
Is, there are other jobs outthere that we can go and get. If
I wanted to quit my jobtomorrow, I would be fine. Would
I be like, Oh, wow, I just didthat. I would be fine, because I
know that I could go down thestreet and get a bartending job
or a serving job and make twiceas much money, right?
Kristen Daukas (27:30):
Because everybody's getting drunk up in
DC,
Unknown (27:35):
especially in my election year. One thing we do
not lack is restaurants andbars. And yes, it is an election
year, so that's going to bereally interesting. And I like,
do hope that I see the benefitsof that in my position at my
hotel, you know, smallconvention, small conferences
with delegates coming in and outvisiting so we'll see. Yeah. I
(27:58):
mean, I think, I mean, I feellike I have, I have a sense of
urgency, but that's because ofthe career path I've chosen.
Like, you know, event planning,there has to be some sort of
emergency, like situation, butI've always been that way,
because being raised by you andyou had it was, if I wanted to
have a play date or sleepoverwith somebody, had to come to
(28:21):
you with a plan. You're gonnatake me there, they're gonna
bring me home. And you'd belike, okay, because I remember
too many times, I'd be like,Well, I don't know. I guess
you're just gonna take me andpick me up. You'd be like, not
happening. So then it was like,Well, I want this to happen, so
let me try to make up. Make itwork. When I was in high school,
you're going to, you know, highschool parties and whatnot, I
always had an escape plan. Assoon as we walked in, I was
(28:43):
like, Where, if, if the policeshow up and bust this party?
Where am I going? Where? What ismy exit route? And do I know
where I am? I definitely alwaysknew where I was. I was very I'm
not directionally challenged atall. So I feel like it
definitely has sense of urgency,but I do understand what you're
saying. I have a friend that haszero salt, zero urgency
(29:05):
whatsoever for anything, and ittakes her forever to get ready.
And she's always like, I'm gonnabe ready at 830 and like, you
know, nine o'clock rolls around,she's like, Okay, now I'm ready.
So, but I love her. She knowsthis. She's one of my best
friends, so she's definitelygonna see this.
Kristen Daukas (29:26):
But we all have that friend, your aunt, Jen, can
be that way. We, you know, ifyou can call it bpt, or we used
to call it, you know, Jennifertime. I mean, you know, some
people just, and it's not, it's,I think they are, they just kind
of go, Okay, let me get this onemore thing done, and then I'll
go do this. So I call, you know,just one more thing syndrome.
(29:48):
But you know, for people likeus, who are always habitually
early and on time, it'll makeyou crazy. It really will, until
you just finally go, okay. Iknow this person is not going
to. Yeah, if I say six, they'renot gonna be ready. Seven
Exactly, yeah, so.
Unknown (30:07):
And then you have like, Mimi, who you say, Come over at
four. She's there at 230
Kristen Daukas (30:11):
Right? Which is why we tell her like 530 Yeah.
Unknown (30:15):
Oh my gosh, I don't know. I feel like the worst
thing about my generation isprobably we absolutely need
immediate, like, gratification,like it has, like, I don't want
to wait for something. I want itjust there. I just want it
there. That's why, like, I havethis terrible habit of taking
Ubers instead of taking themetro, because I don't want to
have to change lines. I don'twant to have to wait for the
(30:36):
metro. I just want to press abutton. A car comes, gets me and
takes me to where I need to go.
And it's cuts the time in half,if not more well,
Kristen Daukas (30:47):
if you can afford it, you know. I mean, the
big theme of our motherdaughter, theme of 2024 for us,
has been budgeting, right? And,you know, going and, you know,
getting a really clearunderstanding of, you know, and
I'll say this, the one thingabout your youngest sister,
she's really good at that. Shecan, I mean, because she breaks
it down to, okay, if I want a$500 camera, I need to work. She
(31:10):
goes, I'll have to work for 20hours. And so she, she's always
thought that way. But you, youhave gotten to be very good
about that now too. You know,nobody likes Well, nobody likes
working. We all work to pay ourbills, but, and, you know,
nobody likes working two jobs,but you do what you have to do
to live the life you want tolive. And I think you're a
little happier, even thoughyou're not crazy about, you
(31:30):
know, the couple of shifts thatyou go into the bar. But isn't,
isn't it a little bit easier nowthat you're not as stressed over
Unknown (31:39):
paying your bills? For sure. Yeah, absolutely.
Kristen Daukas (31:44):
All right, so we're coming in at the end a
little bit. What is somethingthat you want millennials, Gen X
and Boomers, the ones that arestill left, what is something
that you think is veryimportant, that they know about
your generation? Stop
Unknown (32:01):
micromanaging us.
You've already ruined our lives.
Just kidding, no. But seriously,the micromanaging and also your
employees are leaving you.
They're not leaving the job.
They love the job. They justcannot stand you. Unfortunately,
that's that's the case.
Kristen Daukas (32:20):
That was some wise words said by your mom,
right? People don't leave jobs,they leave bosses. And it's
true, and it'll be true the restof your life. I think you're
doing a great job. I don't thinkyou're in the right fit for your
personality, but I think you'rein the right industry, and
you're gonna get there. All ofyou are gonna get there. Nice if
you come across somebody in mygeneration or boomers that are
(32:42):
going to tell you they had theirshit together when they were 25
they're lying to you. They arelying to you. None of us did.
Unknown (32:49):
It's hard, you know, you see these people that are
like, I see these people thatare my age or younger, that are
like, you know, having babies,having multiple babies, or
getting married and like, buyinglike, you know, my having people
that I know buying houses is soinsane. I'm like, Oh my gosh.
Like, what did I do that? Imean, we're the same, we're the
exact same age. We grew uptogether. What did you do
(33:10):
differently that I didn't thatyou're able to do what you're
doing, but it's staying at homeand buying in your you know,
parents backyard, like, that'snot something that I see for
myself and like my future. Like,I would love to come back to
North Carolina eventually, butmost likely not five minutes
(33:32):
from where I grew up. I'm a hugebeliever in like, you have to
grow up outside of where yourroots are. Like, you cannot be
the person who you're supposedto be if you stay in the same
hometown forever. How do youknow that there's not something
better for you out there?
Because you never left, younever tried. And it's really
(33:52):
sad, but also at the same time,it's like, I get it. I stayed at
home till I was 22 and like, Iknow it sounds like you were
only 22 like you were young, butfor me, it was like I was 22
like living at home, like Ishould be gone, I should go and
like, be a different person thanI am from here, and I've seen it
(34:15):
Change the people I'm friendswith. I grew up with people that
I'm no longer speak to, nolonger friends with. I still
wish them well. But then I haveall these friends in DC that
I've made. I've made so manygreat friends here. I've made so
many connections here, that nomatter where I go, I know I'm
gonna have somebody that knows,somebody that's gonna be able to
(34:37):
help me out. You know, get me aquick in and out, a quick job,
you know. Or hey, can do, um,nowhere I should live in this
area, whatever, wherever thecase may be. And like I said, I
have like, 10 friends fromWinston, Salem, North Carolina,
that live here in DC now, one ofthem being my longest known
friend, known her since. Sixthgrade and others that I've known
(35:00):
since freshman year of highschool and middle school, like
it's an absolutely insane and Ican vouch for them that they are
not who I knew in Winston, likethey're absolutely people, and
absolutely I love each and everyone of them so much and probably
more than I did back in Winston,because we were all just like,
it was just that was it all youhad and all you had back home
(35:22):
was each other. There was notreally much to do, which is why
we got in trouble so much. Butlike, out here, like, you just
see people flourishing, and it'sso it's nice. It's nice to see
the success, successes. One ofmy best friends going from
working government contracts tobeing an English teacher, which
(35:42):
threw us all through a loop, butshe loves it. She said, Yeah,
it's stressful, but she loves itso well. And if
Kristen Daukas (35:52):
you remember when you were in high school and
all the drama, because it wasyour class, the class of 2017,
Man, y'all had all the drama.
But I told you I was like, Youthink these people are important
now, but I promise you, the dayyou graduate high school, you
will maybe stay in touch with ahandful of them, and you will
never talk to the rest of themagain unless you go to a
(36:12):
reunion. And it's true, becauseit's those second stage. You
know, some people make thosefriends in college. They're
college friends, but it reallyare those people that you meet
in that second city, or, youknow, if you leave, but you
know, the adult friends, right?
And you're right, those aregoing to be the ones that are in
your life forever. Yeah.
Unknown (36:31):
I mean, I didn't go to college, so I don't have college
friends, but, like, I'm sayingit's just that phase, you know?
Yeah, I see my friends that havecollege friends that they like.
Those are going to be themforever, but they also have some
that change like them. They'relike, I, you know, you have
those horror stories, but Iwould say, I mean, for me, like
(36:53):
these people that I'm meetingnow would be the equivalent of
my college friends. Absolutelyno, it's later in life, but some
of them will, I am more thanconfident will be in my life for
the till the end, I would hopewell
Kristen Daukas (37:09):
and you may get you probably won't all live in
the same area. You know, afterthis, you know you'll all each
launch into your own area, butyou'll stay connected, and
you're right, those you'll havethose connections, and you'll
have those friendships, andyou'll meet up, and it'll be
like, you might not see eachother, but every two or three
years, but they might be like,hey, Kenzie, I'm coming through
Charlotte. You're like, come on,you know, type, so it is, and it
(37:31):
makes me so happy to hear yousay that, because, you know,
when I did the same thing, but Iwent to Chicago, right? And
people would say to me, we're,you know, where are you from?
Or, you know, Where'd you growup? Actually, that was always
like, Where'd you grow up? And Iwould say I was born in North
Carolina, but I grew up inChicago. And I think you are,
you and your sisters are livingthat piece of it right now. You
(37:52):
were born here. Quote on youweren't, but you know what I
mean, but that this is whereyou're growing up, this is where
you're learning to be an adult,and how things work. And I'm
even though I'm your mom, I'm alittle biased. I'm super proud
of you. I'm super proud of you,and I'm and your friends, even
though I don't get to see all mylittle bonus kids that much
(38:12):
anymore, but I love to heartheir stories, you know, when
you tell me about them. So I'msuper proud of all of you. And I
going to end this with the way Istarted it, which is to say, I
love your generation. I thinkthat your generation is going to
be the savior of our world,because God knows, especially on
the boomer side, you know, it isgetting completely torn upside
(38:35):
down right now. And I think youguys are kind of, you know,
you're passionate, but you don'tlet it define you. Does that
make sense? Yeah, I mean, I'mtalking about, like, things that
are going around.
Unknown (38:47):
We're definitely going to talk back absolutely,
Kristen Daukas (38:52):
absolutely and in a constructive way, not in
the way that you used to do whenyou were 10. So no more. So
like, you're going to push back.
You're not going to take that,that that feel the way that
Unknown (39:05):
you're trying to make me feel. Like, why are you doing
that? Like,
Kristen Daukas (39:09):
what's the point? Yeah, all right, well, I
appreciate you taking time outof your busy single cat lady
girl schedule, and to everybodyout there, thank you for
listening and tuning in anduntil we meet again. May your
drinks and coffee be as strongas the will of your oldest
daughter. Take care everybody.
Bye, as the saying goes, youdon't have to go home, but you
(39:33):
can stay here, and that's a wrapfor this week's episode. A big
thanks to my guests for sharingtheir story and to you for
listening. Don't forget to sharethe show with your friends and
spread the words. And if you'dlike to be a guest on the show,
the link is in the show notestill next time cheers you.
Kristen, welcome to Conversations on the rocks,
(00:06):
the podcast where the drink isstrong and the stories are
stronger. I'm your host, Kristendaukas, and this isn't your
average chat fest. Here. Realpeople spill the tea alongside
their favorite drinks, from thehilarious to the heart
wrenching. Each episode a wildcard, you'll laugh, you may cry,
but you'll definitely learnsomething new. So grab whatever,
(00:26):
what's your whistle and buckleup. It's time to dive into the
raw, the real and theridiculously human. Let's get
this chat party started. Heyeverybody, it's Kristen, and you
are tuned in to this week'sepisode of conversations on the
rocks, and the last episode Ihad Jen, my bestie, my bestest
(00:48):
bestie in the world. Becauseremember I said, if you think
you've got the bestest bestie,you're wrong. But today I have a
very well it is actually anunexpected guest, because when
she said that she wanted to dothis. I was gobsmacked, because
she was vehemently against it.
And whereas I had my best friendon before, I have on a young
lady who gave me the title ofmom, I have my oldest beautiful
(01:12):
daughter, Mackenzie, and I'm soexcited that she's here.
Mackenzie, tell everybody? Hey,
Unknown (01:21):
hi,
Kristen Daukas (01:24):
normally, she won't shut up, and now she's
gonna give me one word answers.
Unknown (01:27):
Yeah, sure. Why
Kristen Daukas (01:29):
don't you? Why don't you tell everybody a
little bit about yourself?
Unknown (01:33):
Okay, I'm 25 years old.
I live in DC with like 10 peopleI know from my hometown, which
is insane. I am a catering salesmanager at a large convention
hotel in DC, and I have a littleside gig being like a host,
bartender, top master kind ofdeal. Yeah. I mean, just living
(01:56):
my life in DC, she's living
Kristen Daukas (02:01):
her best life, and what we're going to be
talking about today is hergeneration. And if you know me,
or if you've listened to thisshow and don't know me, you know
that I am a huge, huge advocatefor Gen Z. I am a Gen Xer, and
for the most part, Gen Xersbirthed the Gen Z and they get a
(02:22):
lot of crap. They really do. Andyou know, I was talking to a
friend who when I told her I wasgoing to be interviewing you,
and I'm actually going to bedoing this the entire month of
August. So my entire month ofAugust shows are with Gen Z,
ers, one of Mackenzie's friendsis going to sit in the hot seat
here in a couple of weeks. Andmy friend said, Why don't you
(02:44):
ask them why they don't want towork? And I said, Hold on,
that's absolutely not true. Arethere some out there that don't
want to absolutely but everysingle Gen Z or I know, busts
their ass and they do it.
Because, why? Mackenzie? I mean,we have no choice. You have to
because one of the things I wantyou to talk about is your
(03:08):
perspective of, you, know, yourfuture. I've said it before, and
I truly it makes me very sad tomake this statement, but I
really, I just can't see the wayour world is right now, how you
and your sisters and any of yourfriends will ever own your own
house or a condo? I mean, I knowyou've got one friend that has
(03:31):
but that's just she's isn't she,like the only one of your
friends that has her own place
Unknown (03:38):
in DC, I have four friends that own, two own, or
three of them own in Virginia.
One owns in DC proper. I thinkit's two condos, a row house and
an actual house. And then I havea friend back at home who does
own a house in Boone. And
Kristen Daukas (03:58):
how does that make you feel? Do you think? Do
you think that you'll ever beable to own property?
Unknown (04:03):
I guess it depends on where I decide to like, settle,
to like, you know, have a familyand live for the majority of my
life. But if, situationallyspeaking, right now in DC,
absolutely not.
Kristen Daukas (04:17):
And how do you like big city living?
Unknown (04:19):
You know, I don't mind it. It's kind of crazy. You
know, going home from the barsat two in the morning and the
Uber you're looking out thewindow and you're seeing, like,
all these amazing monuments andlike, just like the city life
moving around. I definitely missNorth Carolina. I miss the
comfort, the Southern Comfort,literally. But I like it,
(04:41):
generally speaking, there's alot for me out here. There's a
lot of good opportunity, whichis why I moved here. But I mean,
you know, there's no place likehome, literally. So I would like
to live in maybe a more of ahybrid area, where they're a
little bit suburbia, a littlebit of city. So.
Kristen Daukas (05:00):
So you live in DC, and it is a very contentious
area. How did, how do I knowthat it makes me nervous, as
your mom having you live therewith all of the unrest, how do
you how do you feel about allthe political and things going
(05:23):
on there, the protests. Do youever feel not safe? What? What's
your take on that
Unknown (05:29):
with the protests? I never like feel unsafe because
of them. I do think whathappened this past week was
absolutely insane, and we thereshould be no place to that, and
this city or America in general,but where I actually like put my
head to rest, we don't haveprotesting over here, over by
(05:50):
where I work. We definitely haveprotests when we have certain
events and stuff. So I just haveto remember that I am safe due
to the security that we employ.
And DC police kind of have acontrol on things, but it's hard
to say, because you look atvideos from this past week, you
(06:14):
see people attacking the policeofficers, and they're not doing
much. They're not able to reallyarrest people, from my
understanding, it's kind of likea it's a no man's land when it
comes to that kind of stuff. Theonly time I feel like kind of
unsafe is probably like walkinghome at night, just what you're
(06:35):
not supposed to do. Yeah, that'swhy we have scooters and Ubers,
just because it can, I mean,it's there are crazy people
everywhere. I'm grateful I donot have a car with the car
jackings. It's
Kristen Daukas (06:53):
everywhere. I mean, obviously in your more
populous areas, you're going tohear about it more often, but it
happens here in Winston. I mean,you know that you lived here,
you grew you know you grew uphere. Let's talk a little bit
about the technology you beingfrom the 20th century, and not
the 21st century. Yeah, shestill has, she's a 19 you did
(07:18):
not, you know, you're not thatyou can really remember your
first couple of years, but forthe most part, a lot of people
in your generation have nevernot known technology, right,
right? And you know your yourlittle sister, she definitely, I
mean, by that point, we hadiPads and laptops and stuff like
that. You not so much. We didn'thave an iPad when you were
(07:40):
little, but that didn't stop youfrom watching Blues Clues and
all those other fun shows in thePower Puff Girls, but it was,
you know, with my background,you guys knew that I was always
a little ahead of the curve withyou and your friends, right?
However, there were alwayslittle situations. How do you
(08:01):
think growing up in the middleof social media and all that
technology? Do you think? Andyou know, there's a lot going on
right now on legislation wherethey're trying to really make it
illegal for anyone under 13 tohave social media. What's your
take on how that impacted yougrowing up, and the friendships
and the relationships that youhad.
Unknown (08:21):
I mean, like in middle school, I remember becoming
friends with people on Facebookthat were friends of friends,
which then blossomed into actualfriendships. I met one of my
closest friends through likeInstagram or Facebook, and then
we didn't even go to the sameschool. And then the next year,
(08:42):
when we were high school, we metlike, we were hanging out, and
like, became super close justbecause of social media. So I
mean, I think it's nice forbridging gaps between friend
groups and like, you know,friends of friends. So I mean, I
think, I mean 13, I mean, Iguess that makes sense, but that
was more so for I feel likepeople like my generation, and
(09:04):
not the younger people, becausenow, like these young kids are
doing things at like 11 yearsold that I was doing at like
1314, years old. So I mean,Tiktok has taken everyone by
storm. You see these people onthere and you're like, oh my
gosh, they're like, 11 yearsold, doing these crazy Tiktok
dances, whatever. So, I mean, wedefinitely didn't have
Kristen Daukas (09:28):
that. What about the negative side of it, like
the cyberbullying, um, I
Unknown (09:32):
mean, we had this one platform called Ask fm, which
you could, like, send peoplequestions anonymously or put
their put your name, but it wasmore anonymously, and that was,
that was probably the worst itcould have been for cyber
bullying. I think if you'retalking like random people cyber
(09:53):
bullying, then like you'relooking at like Omegle and those
chat rooms and stuff. Of but Idon't think, like, for me, like
Instagram was really like acyber bullying platform. Twitter
was kind of rough. You get in aTwitter fight with somebody, and
(10:13):
everyone sees that stuff, andyou know, it's still out there
to this day, you don't go backand delete it. But I mean, then
I think the net, the biggestnegative impact that social
media has on us is on how welook and societal norms.
Kristen Daukas (10:31):
Let's talk about that. You know,
Unknown (10:33):
it's you see like the Kim Kardashians, the Kylie
Jenners on social media. You ofcourse, think they're beautiful
and want to look like them, butthen it's putting unrealistic
ideas into young women and youngmen's heads, that that's what
they have to look like to beaccepted by people, or
especially, you know, to like beliked by whoever they're desired
(10:57):
to be liked by. And it's it'ssad for sure, because you see
the eating disorders and themental health disorders come out
of that. I mean, we've all beenthere, been through it.
Kristen Daukas (11:09):
I and, you know, I have a real big soap box when
it comes to societal norms. AndI think one of the conversations
that I'm having with one of yourfriends is along the lines of,
you know, real relationships.
And you know, we have, we justfound out this week that,
apparently, if you are a cat, asingle cat lady, it's a bad
thing which you are. You're asingle, double cat lady,
Unknown (11:35):
two cats, with two cats.
Kristen Daukas (11:38):
And I think that that is just, there's so much
wrong with those statements andthose sentiments. And you know
that I'm a big but I want youguys to find someone you know,
well, first of all, you got tobe happy with yourself, right?
I've always talked to that, andif you you've got to make
yourself happy. You can't putthat job on somebody else. But
at the same time, you knowyou're not supposed to go
(12:00):
through your entire life alone,and it's always easier to have
somebody you know by your sideto support you. How do you and
then, oh, reminds me, I've gotanother question on this one
that kind of segue into this. Doyou feel pressured? Do you feel
pressured to be in arelationship? Do you want to be
in a relationship? I mean, howdo you feel about that? Do you
feel like society pressures youthat you're less than if you're
(12:23):
not in a relationship. I mean,obviously they, they do, you
know, if you're JD Vance, ifyou're not married with five
kids,
Unknown (12:32):
so I do not feel pressured by society to be
dating. Do I want to be in arelationship? Yeah, but, I mean,
that's just like, I feel likeeverybody wants someone so but
no, I don't feel pressured by Idon't feel pressured by society
to be in a relationship. I don'teven think I saw that comment
from him.
Kristen Daukas (12:52):
Oh yeah, it just, it was just a couple of
days ago. Yeah, that that's whyyou're seeing all the memes now,
of like, you know, the the timecover with Taylor with her cats.
And, you know, talking about thechildless cat lady, like, I
don't know, she's doing prettydamn good for herself to be a
childless cat lady.
Unknown (13:12):
She's, yeah, she's fine.
Kristen Daukas (13:15):
Oh no, gosh, we could talk about that for a
really long time. Okay, sospeaking of one of the
conversations with my friend whomade the why don't they want to
work comment, she just recentlyattended a wedding, and it just
kind of made my knee jerk, andI've asked you this. I love your
(13:36):
generation. You know that, butwhy are y'all so extra? Why are
you so extra and we'll just usethe birthdays as a thing. Why
can't you just go to the cornerbar and get drunk like we did?
Why do y'all have to take thesetrips? I mean, I love it. It's a
great adventure. I'm notjudging, but I'm like, you know,
if it's a, you know, 25 a fiveand an O, you know, those are
(13:58):
always big birthdays in my book,fives and O's. But like, I mean,
I don't call you out. You'redoing one for your 26 you're
going to New Orleans. I can'teven remember. I think I can
remember, I got drunk with myfriends. That's what I did for
my 26th birthday,
Unknown (14:12):
and that's what I'm doing for my 26th birthday, just
with different views and moremore fun. I don't know. I mean,
I am going to New Orleans for my26th birthday with a group of,
like 10 people, and we'restarting to potentially, maybe
have more people come. We'llsee. I don't know what it is. I
(14:34):
mean, only two out of the 10 ofus have ever been and everyone
is extremely excited. We're allvery excited. But, I mean, I
don't know it's, it's a veryspecific thing that's really
started happening since I movedto DC. It's just, I mean, if you
have the time to go and do it,then we're gonna go do it. I
(14:56):
mean, pretty much for everybirthday that we have, we are
renting out. Some sort of spaceat a bar or restaurant to
celebrate and then makinganother stop along the way
before we go home. But I mean,
Kristen Daukas (15:10):
you're making experiences that I mean, I'm
not. I'm not making judgingyourself.
Unknown (15:15):
You can always make more money, you can always make
more memories, and just live bythat and but, yeah, I mean, I've
had friends ask me to go toTulum for their birthdays. And,
you know, it's like, it's crazy,so, but I'm excited. So
Kristen Daukas (15:30):
maybe not the birthday, but let's talk about
the weddings and the engagementsand the honeymoons and the stuff
like that. Like, I mean, some ofthese young ladies, these brides
to be. They're freaking crazy. Imean, it is insane. How like
these bachelorette partiestrips? I mean, it's one thing
(15:50):
for a trip, but then, and youcould probably describe it
better than me, you know,there's outfits of the day.
There's got to be a color youcan't do. Talk a little bit
about that, because that ismadness to me.
Unknown (16:01):
I mean, I, I feel like, like, 10 years ago, obviously, I
was 15 years old, and I don'tknow if that was happening back
then, but I feel like it's likea recent thing to have the, you
know, the pink pony club event,the we're all wearing white, the
breads wearing black, or we'reall wearing tan. It's just, if
(16:24):
you think about it in adifferent way, it's kind of
helpful for outfits. So at leastyou know you're gonna have to
wear a very specific outfit whenevery single night. So there's
no oh, I don't know what I'mgonna wear. That's a good so I
see it that way, like for mywhat was it? My 25th 24th
(16:44):
birthday. My 24th birthday, Itold everybody to wear black,
which I have to interrupt
Kristen Daukas (16:50):
her real quick.
We thought that was going to bethe end of because she
introduced the entire family,meaning her dad and I, to the
concept of a golden birthday.
Now it pretty much ticked all ofher sisters off because
Mackenzie explain what a goldenbirthday is. A
Unknown (17:04):
golden birthday is when you turn your age on the day you
were born. So for me, I was bornon September 24 and I was
turning 24 on the 24th and itwas a Saturday. So of course, we
had a huge party. And I wasenjoying birthday party,
actually, with one of my friendsthat I used to work at the bar
with, and it was both of ourgolden birthdays. So of course,
(17:25):
we had to go all out, but goldeneverybody
Kristen Daukas (17:28):
else in the family missed it. I guess my
golden birthday was when Iturned 17. Your dad was when he
turned five. Poor Cassie, she'sthe one closest. I mean, she had
hers when she was four, and yourSydney was when she turned 14.
But apparently, for those of usthat are Gen X, there is an
opportunity for us at somepoint, if we stay alive that
long. And what is that? Ourplatinum birthday? What's it
(17:53):
called?
Unknown (17:53):
I would assume so, or like, silver birthday,
Kristen Daukas (17:56):
but Silver's less than gold. We're gonna say
platinum. It's
Unknown (18:01):
when you turn the age on the year.
Kristen Daukas (18:04):
So if I can make it to 68 I'm having a platinum
birthday party, and y'all areall invited.
Unknown (18:09):
I highly doubt I'm gonna see 2098 but
Kristen Daukas (18:13):
you had yours, you're able to to embrace it. So
I guess that means so Sid's gotto make it to Can't she can't
even do it. She can't, she'sshe's screwed. She was born in
2001 she screwed Cassie too. Soyour dad and I are the only ones
that have any chance left. But Ido, I do agree with you on the
(18:37):
fact of it does help forplanning. It just seems so bossy
to me. There just seems like awhole lot of bossiness. And I
shouldn't say that word, becausethat's not, that's really, that
has a bad connotation. Therejust seems like a lot of
demands. Maybe that's not bossy.
It's very demanding on and it'snot the bride that's really
orchestrating this. It's hermaid of honor, or, you know, her
(18:59):
bridesmaids that are kind oforchestrating this, but I think
it's demanding.
Unknown (19:04):
I mean it, I agree, but I think it only if you're not
giving me enough heads up, likeif you text me three days before
your wedding or before yourbachelorette, that you want me
to have seven different outfitsper theme, response. But if you
(19:25):
were dressing in all black, ifyou asked me four months
beforehand, that's completelydifferent story. You've given me
more than enough time to putaside money to do it, you know,
buy pieces here and there. Like,figure out what I'm going to
execute on that, and I feel likethat's appropriate, but I also
think it's not like, this iswhat we're doing. It's how do
(19:47):
you guys feel about doing this?
Like, if you ask me how I feelabout doing pink pony club on
Friday night, and I'm like, Oh,that's a great idea. And half
the other girls are like, No, Idon't want to do that. Then,
like, you need to also. Listento your audience.
Kristen Daukas (20:01):
What is pink?
What is the, what's the pinkpony club?
Unknown (20:05):
It's like chapel Ron's thing. Like, just pink. Pink
Pony Club. Like cowgirl,sparkly. Okay, all right, space,
cowgirl, without the space. So Idon't know, but it could be, it
could be worse. There could itcould be Bridezilla esque. And
(20:29):
if you think about it, thesetrips are just photo
opportunities. True. They reallyare. They're fun. They're fun. I
went on a bachelorette in June,and it was so much fun. It was
like a cabin kind of weekend. Wewent to the middle of North
Carolina and had the best timeever. And we had, like, I think
(20:50):
we did, like, like a kind of,like a country redneck kind of
vibe. And then the other onewas, like, super girly, like
cottage core fairy kind of deal.
And I luckily had some stuff,and was able to borrow some
stuff from a friend. But then wedid the T shirts where all of
(21:11):
our faces were on it. So insteadof one of the themes, the bride
gave us all t shirts with ourfaces on it. And it was super
cool. So, I mean, if all, Idon't know how I would probably
react to, like, a super, like,intense, strict voucher, having
that been my first one, andbeing a being as great as it
(21:33):
was, right, I hope they're,
Kristen Daukas (21:38):
I hope they're all like that. They're not going
to be. You know that. And I knowsome of your I know some of your
friends, so I can guarantee youthey're not going to be like
that. How much are these girlsspending on not the one that you
just went to, but you know, Iknow plenty of your other
friends have been to the reallycrazy bachelorette type
weekends. That's that's a lot ofmoney. You guys are money that
you don't have. I might add,
Unknown (21:59):
yeah, credit cards are great credit but they're not
right. They are in thosesituations when you have to,
like, drop a lot at one time,right? Trying to think of anyone
that I know that's been on aintense voucher at
Kristen Daukas (22:22):
that's all right, that's all right.
Unknown (22:27):
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Kristen Daukas (22:55):
So let me ask you this, what are, what would
you say are some of the biggestchallenges that your generation
faces. You know, whether it'seconomic, social, environmental,
what are some of the biggestissues that you think that
you're having to your group'shaving to deal with? We can we
kind of touched on money?
Unknown (23:11):
Definitely, money.
Yeah, for sure. And then also,like,
for me right now, like you weresaying, we hate to work. I hate
working, but it's like somethingthat we just have to do, like
(23:31):
you said, we just have to do itlike and the people we are
working for do not want to adaptto society. They don't want to
change. They don't want to bemodern. They like
Kristen Daukas (23:47):
these. Talk about that. Talk about that.
What do you mean?
Unknown (23:52):
These corporate companies are unaware that, like
we know that there are othercompanies that we can go and
work for that, adapt to likethat, work from home, that flux,
this flux schedule. I'm notsaying like we all want work
from home jobs, but we want theability to be able to work from
home without it being an issue.
And I feel like, after covid,you know, work from home was
(24:15):
huge, and then everyone waslike, screw that. We're going
back to in office seven days orfive days a week. Like, you have
to be there for X amount ofhours, and it's hard, you know,
some people have kids, somepeople have other jobs. Some
people like, they have, youknow, like, if you have an
appointment, I have to, youstill have to go into work, and
(24:37):
then you have to leave early.
And then you're, you're like,This is not, this is not
conducive to my lifestyle.
Pretty much, it's not
Kristen Daukas (24:47):
conducive to living. Is? It's very true. I
mean, I think about the factthat, you know, I'm not gonna
say I'm blessed because I workedmy ass off to work for myself,
right? Absolutely. But I knowfor sure that I would not be
able to do things like i. Hey,I'm going up Wednesday to Sunday
to visit you, right? And I'mstill working. I mean, you've
seen that. What you know, I'mworking. I'm working in the
(25:07):
morning so, and I agree withyou, especially, even in your
position, which is a very onsite position, there's no reason
why you can't work from home twodays a week, exactly, you know,
I'm not saying every day,because it's very, it is a very
hands on thing, and definitelynot days where you have events,
that's, I mean, but you have, Idon't think they give you guys
enough credit to be able to, youknow, use that. Remember when I
(25:29):
was talking sometimes my biggestfrustration with Gen Z is the
lack of critical thinking. YouYou made the comment that you
weren't even sure what thatmeant. That's critical thinking.
That's saying, Okay, I've,here's my schedule this week. I
have, you know, I've got officework on this day and this day I
don't need to be in the office.
However, I've got a big event onTuesday and Thursday. That's
(25:49):
critical thinking. That's going,you know, just taking an
overview. And I you girls are mygirls. You my my three hens are
very good with criticalthinking, but you were raised by
me, right? There are definitelysome of your generation that you
just go, what are you thinking?
Because you're not and what, andI've often said to one of my
(26:11):
other little ribs with Gen Z, isyour lack of sense of urgency,
right? So, but I think that'smore of a Kristen thing, because
I'm just like, go, go, go, go,go, all the time. And you know,
you guys have a differentapproach. So let's talk a little
bit about your approach to workand life balance. And you know,
(26:34):
you work to pay your bills,which most of us do. But I just,
and I'm, I'm happy for y'allthat you recognize that it's
like the person I told you. Itold you I ran into yesterday
that you went to school with.
One of the things I said, Isaid, good for you for
recognizing that being ateacher, which was causing her
so much stress, it was affectingher mentally and physically. I
(26:57):
said, good for you for honoringyourself. Whereas my parents
would have been like, you stay,you stay. You got to work, work,
work, work, work. You know,unless you've got like, 105
degree temperature, you go in.
Unknown (27:12):
See, that's the thing.
Is, there are other jobs outthere that we can go and get. If
I wanted to quit my jobtomorrow, I would be fine. Would
I be like, Oh, wow, I just didthat. I would be fine, because I
know that I could go down thestreet and get a bartending job
or a serving job and make twiceas much money, right?
Kristen Daukas (27:30):
Because everybody's getting drunk up in
DC,
Unknown (27:35):
especially in my election year. One thing we do
not lack is restaurants andbars. And yes, it is an election
year, so that's going to bereally interesting. And I like,
do hope that I see the benefitsof that in my position at my
hotel, you know, smallconvention, small conferences
with delegates coming in and outvisiting so we'll see. Yeah. I
(27:58):
mean, I think, I mean, I feellike I have, I have a sense of
urgency, but that's because ofthe career path I've chosen.
Like, you know, event planning,there has to be some sort of
emergency, like situation, butI've always been that way,
because being raised by you andyou had it was, if I wanted to
have a play date or sleepoverwith somebody, had to come to
(28:21):
you with a plan. You're gonnatake me there, they're gonna
bring me home. And you'd belike, okay, because I remember
too many times, I'd be like,Well, I don't know. I guess
you're just gonna take me andpick me up. You'd be like, not
happening. So then it was like,Well, I want this to happen, so
let me try to make up. Make itwork. When I was in high school,
you're going to, you know, highschool parties and whatnot, I
always had an escape plan. Assoon as we walked in, I was
(28:43):
like, Where, if, if the policeshow up and bust this party?
Where am I going? Where? What ismy exit route? And do I know
where I am? I definitely alwaysknew where I was. I was very I'm
not directionally challenged atall. So I feel like it
definitely has sense of urgency,but I do understand what you're
saying. I have a friend that haszero salt, zero urgency
(29:05):
whatsoever for anything, and ittakes her forever to get ready.
And she's always like, I'm gonnabe ready at 830 and like, you
know, nine o'clock rolls around,she's like, Okay, now I'm ready.
So, but I love her. She knowsthis. She's one of my best
friends, so she's definitelygonna see this.
Kristen Daukas (29:26):
But we all have that friend, your aunt, Jen, can
be that way. We, you know, ifyou can call it bpt, or we used
to call it, you know, Jennifertime. I mean, you know, some
people just, and it's not, it's,I think they are, they just kind
of go, Okay, let me get this onemore thing done, and then I'll
go do this. So I call, you know,just one more thing syndrome.
(29:48):
But you know, for people likeus, who are always habitually
early and on time, it'll makeyou crazy. It really will, until
you just finally go, okay. Iknow this person is not going
to. Yeah, if I say six, they'renot gonna be ready. Seven
Exactly, yeah, so.
Unknown (30:07):
And then you have like, Mimi, who you say, Come over at
four. She's there at 230
Kristen Daukas (30:11):
Right? Which is why we tell her like 530 Yeah.
Unknown (30:15):
Oh my gosh, I don't know. I feel like the worst
thing about my generation isprobably we absolutely need
immediate, like, gratification,like it has, like, I don't want
to wait for something. I want itjust there. I just want it
there. That's why, like, I havethis terrible habit of taking
Ubers instead of taking themetro, because I don't want to
have to change lines. I don'twant to have to wait for the
(30:36):
metro. I just want to press abutton. A car comes, gets me and
takes me to where I need to go.
And it's cuts the time in half,if not more well,
Kristen Daukas (30:47):
if you can afford it, you know. I mean, the
big theme of our motherdaughter, theme of 2024 for us,
has been budgeting, right? And,you know, going and, you know,
getting a really clearunderstanding of, you know, and
I'll say this, the one thingabout your youngest sister,
she's really good at that. Shecan, I mean, because she breaks
it down to, okay, if I want a$500 camera, I need to work. She
(31:10):
goes, I'll have to work for 20hours. And so she, she's always
thought that way. But you, youhave gotten to be very good
about that now too. You know,nobody likes Well, nobody likes
working. We all work to pay ourbills, but, and, you know,
nobody likes working two jobs,but you do what you have to do
to live the life you want tolive. And I think you're a
little happier, even thoughyou're not crazy about, you
(31:30):
know, the couple of shifts thatyou go into the bar. But isn't,
isn't it a little bit easier nowthat you're not as stressed over
Unknown (31:39):
paying your bills? For sure. Yeah, absolutely.
Kristen Daukas (31:44):
All right, so we're coming in at the end a
little bit. What is somethingthat you want millennials, Gen X
and Boomers, the ones that arestill left, what is something
that you think is veryimportant, that they know about
your generation? Stop
Unknown (32:01):
micromanaging us.
You've already ruined our lives.
Just kidding, no. But seriously,the micromanaging and also your
employees are leaving you.
They're not leaving the job.
They love the job. They justcannot stand you. Unfortunately,
that's that's the case.
Kristen Daukas (32:20):
That was some wise words said by your mom,
right? People don't leave jobs,they leave bosses. And it's
true, and it'll be true the restof your life. I think you're
doing a great job. I don't thinkyou're in the right fit for your
personality, but I think you'rein the right industry, and
you're gonna get there. All ofyou are gonna get there. Nice if
you come across somebody in mygeneration or boomers that are
(32:42):
going to tell you they had theirshit together when they were 25
they're lying to you. They arelying to you. None of us did.
Unknown (32:49):
It's hard, you know, you see these people that are
like, I see these people thatare my age or younger, that are
like, you know, having babies,having multiple babies, or
getting married and like, buyinglike, you know, my having people
that I know buying houses is soinsane. I'm like, Oh my gosh.
Like, what did I do that? Imean, we're the same, we're the
exact same age. We grew uptogether. What did you do
(33:10):
differently that I didn't thatyou're able to do what you're
doing, but it's staying at homeand buying in your you know,
parents backyard, like, that'snot something that I see for
myself and like my future. Like,I would love to come back to
North Carolina eventually, butmost likely not five minutes
(33:32):
from where I grew up. I'm a hugebeliever in like, you have to
grow up outside of where yourroots are. Like, you cannot be
the person who you're supposedto be if you stay in the same
hometown forever. How do youknow that there's not something
better for you out there?
Because you never left, younever tried. And it's really
(33:52):
sad, but also at the same time,it's like, I get it. I stayed at
home till I was 22 and like, Iknow it sounds like you were
only 22 like you were young, butfor me, it was like I was 22
like living at home, like Ishould be gone, I should go and
like, be a different person thanI am from here, and I've seen it
(34:15):
Change the people I'm friendswith. I grew up with people that
I'm no longer speak to, nolonger friends with. I still
wish them well. But then I haveall these friends in DC that
I've made. I've made so manygreat friends here. I've made so
many connections here, that nomatter where I go, I know I'm
gonna have somebody that knows,somebody that's gonna be able to
(34:37):
help me out. You know, get me aquick in and out, a quick job,
you know. Or hey, can do, um,nowhere I should live in this
area, whatever, wherever thecase may be. And like I said, I
have like, 10 friends fromWinston, Salem, North Carolina,
that live here in DC now, one ofthem being my longest known
friend, known her since. Sixthgrade and others that I've known
(35:00):
since freshman year of highschool and middle school, like
it's an absolutely insane and Ican vouch for them that they are
not who I knew in Winston, likethey're absolutely people, and
absolutely I love each and everyone of them so much and probably
more than I did back in Winston,because we were all just like,
it was just that was it all youhad and all you had back home
(35:22):
was each other. There was notreally much to do, which is why
we got in trouble so much. Butlike, out here, like, you just
see people flourishing, and it'sso it's nice. It's nice to see
the success, successes. One ofmy best friends going from
working government contracts tobeing an English teacher, which
(35:42):
threw us all through a loop, butshe loves it. She said, Yeah,
it's stressful, but she loves itso well. And if
Kristen Daukas (35:52):
you remember when you were in high school and
all the drama, because it wasyour class, the class of 2017,
Man, y'all had all the drama.
But I told you I was like, Youthink these people are important
now, but I promise you, the dayyou graduate high school, you
will maybe stay in touch with ahandful of them, and you will
never talk to the rest of themagain unless you go to a
(36:12):
reunion. And it's true, becauseit's those second stage. You
know, some people make thosefriends in college. They're
college friends, but it reallyare those people that you meet
in that second city, or, youknow, if you leave, but you
know, the adult friends, right?
And you're right, those aregoing to be the ones that are in
your life forever. Yeah.
Unknown (36:31):
I mean, I didn't go to college, so I don't have college
friends, but, like, I'm sayingit's just that phase, you know?
Yeah, I see my friends that havecollege friends that they like.
Those are going to be themforever, but they also have some
that change like them. They'relike, I, you know, you have
those horror stories, but Iwould say, I mean, for me, like
(36:53):
these people that I'm meetingnow would be the equivalent of
my college friends. Absolutelyno, it's later in life, but some
of them will, I am more thanconfident will be in my life for
the till the end, I would hopewell
Kristen Daukas (37:09):
and you may get you probably won't all live in
the same area. You know, afterthis, you know you'll all each
launch into your own area, butyou'll stay connected, and
you're right, those you'll havethose connections, and you'll
have those friendships, andyou'll meet up, and it'll be
like, you might not see eachother, but every two or three
years, but they might be like,hey, Kenzie, I'm coming through
Charlotte. You're like, come on,you know, type, so it is, and it
(37:31):
makes me so happy to hear yousay that, because, you know,
when I did the same thing, but Iwent to Chicago, right? And
people would say to me, we're,you know, where are you from?
Or, you know, Where'd you growup? Actually, that was always
like, Where'd you grow up? And Iwould say I was born in North
Carolina, but I grew up inChicago. And I think you are,
you and your sisters are livingthat piece of it right now. You
(37:52):
were born here. Quote on youweren't, but you know what I
mean, but that this is whereyou're growing up, this is where
you're learning to be an adult,and how things work. And I'm
even though I'm your mom, I'm alittle biased. I'm super proud
of you. I'm super proud of you,and I'm and your friends, even
though I don't get to see all mylittle bonus kids that much
(38:12):
anymore, but I love to heartheir stories, you know, when
you tell me about them. So I'msuper proud of all of you. And I
going to end this with the way Istarted it, which is to say, I
love your generation. I thinkthat your generation is going to
be the savior of our world,because God knows, especially on
the boomer side, you know, it isgetting completely torn upside
(38:35):
down right now. And I think youguys are kind of, you know,
you're passionate, but you don'tlet it define you. Does that
make sense? Yeah, I mean, I'mtalking about, like, things that
are going around.
Unknown (38:47):
We're definitely going to talk back absolutely,
Kristen Daukas (38:52):
absolutely and in a constructive way, not in
the way that you used to do whenyou were 10. So no more. So
like, you're going to push back.
You're not going to take that,that that feel the way that
Unknown (39:05):
you're trying to make me feel. Like, why are you doing
that? Like,
Kristen Daukas (39:09):
what's the point? Yeah, all right, well, I
appreciate you taking time outof your busy single cat lady
girl schedule, and to everybodyout there, thank you for
listening and tuning in anduntil we meet again. May your
drinks and coffee be as strongas the will of your oldest
daughter. Take care everybody.
Bye, as the saying goes, youdon't have to go home, but you
(39:33):
can stay here, and that's a wrapfor this week's episode. A big
thanks to my guests for sharingtheir story and to you for
listening. Don't forget to sharethe show with your friends and
spread the words. And if you'dlike to be a guest on the show,
the link is in the show notestill next time cheers you.
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