July 21, 2025 • 42 mins
We dive into quality time as a workplace appreciation language, exploring how it manifests differently from personal relationships and impacts team dynamics.
• Survey results from our Discord show Acts of Service (7 votes) and Words of Affirmation (2 votes) leading workplace appreciation languages
• Quality Time breaks down into five distinct "dialects": focused attention, quality conversation, shared experiences, working together on tasks, and small group dialogue
• Understanding which dialect resonates with colleagues requires observation or direct conversation about preferences
• Workplace quality time differs significantly from personal relationships, requiring professional boundaries while still fulfilling connection needs
• Collaboration sessions and team problem-solving can satisfy quality time needs while remaining professionally productive
• Companies implementing appreciation language awareness could significantly improve employee satisfaction and retention
• Personal experiences with "lean coffee" meetings demonstrate how quality time activities create meaningful workplace connections
Join our Discord community through the link in the show notes. Please share this podcast with friends and colleagues, and leave us a review - we truly appreciate your support!
Click/Tap HERE for everything Corporate Strategy
Elevator Music by Julian Avila
Promoted by MrSnooze
Don't forget ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ it helps!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I just want to take the time to thank Clark, my
podcast co-host, for all thegood things he brings to every
podcast that I couldn't dospecifically.
I suck at creating content anddriving compelling podcast
material, and without Clark Itruly believe this podcast would
(00:23):
have ended on episode six.
So thanks, Clark, foreverything you do.
Thank you, Bruce.
How's that?
How's that?
I?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
feel really appreciated because of you,
because I am words ofaffirmation, which is the first
appreciation language in theworkplace.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
That's your thing and that's what we talked about
last episode, so if you didn'tlisten to that, go back.
Actually, there's two episodeson our series of appreciation,
so go listen to those.
This is the third.
On the second topic of thisseries, welcome back to
Corporate Strategy Podcast.
Put in an email.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark andlet's get into it.
(01:11):
We did a survey in our Discord,which you haven't seen yet,
have you Clark?
No, I haven't seen the survey.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
I did not participate in the survey because I was
cute.
Well, one I was, I was.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I was a broad.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Actually, no, no, no wait.
I think I popped in there.
I think I popped in there anddid something because I wanted
to participate.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
I'm not okay, well, thank you but I'll figure it out
I appreciate your participation.
I mean, to be fair, you did makethe survey, I just copy pasted
it.
So in the on our discord, whichyou can join by going into the
show notes and clicking join ourdiscord, uh, we have a
marketing you channel which isfocused on uh, sharing job ideas
and and sharing you knowpersonality types.
I thought this is kind of theperfect place to put a survey
about which appreciationlanguage you feel most valued at
(01:48):
Interesting.
So, of the choices, if this isyour first episode listening,
you can go with words ofaffirmation, which is our last
episode.
Acts of service, quality time,which we're talking about today,
tangible gifts or appropriatephysical touch, and do you know
what the most picked?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
one was clark if you tell me physical touch, I'm
going to flip my leg.
Oh I would not.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
I would have quit the podcast like 169.
It would have been the lastepisode.
I would have shut down thediscord because we have nothing
but freaks in there and youwould have never heard from
bruce and clark again.
Thank god, uh, no way no one,literally no one.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Interesting, interesting, okay, I I think
access service might be first.
Then that's my hunch, you are100.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Correct access service had seven votes.
Words of affirmation Well, sixvotes, sorry, because there's
always one.
So words of affirmation twoQuality time none.
Tangible gifts one and none forphysical touch Appropriate
physical touch.
So thank you to our Discordcommunity for participating in
(02:58):
the poll.
It's good information.
I myself am an acts of serviceperson, so I get it, I agree,
and I'm excited to get ofservice person.
So I get it, I agree, and I'mexcited to get to that episode.
But that's not what we'retalking about today.
You know it'll be interesting.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Yeah, unfortunately we're not quite there yet.
It'll be interesting like afterwe explain them, because I can
tell you like reading this book,I definitely have changed my
thinking on some of these somuch so that I can actually kind
of see physical touch.
We're going to get there.
But spoiler.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think it's going to be a really good discussion and
we might change some people'sminds we're going to run a poll
after the series ends maybe acouple weeks after someone has a
chance to listen to theepisodes and we'll do the same
questions plus a.
Did you change your answer?
So I'm very curious, once weget through this, to see how
this shakes out.
But today you're gonna have toeducate me because again I'm the
(03:51):
moron in the room.
Here.
You are the expert.
What the heck are we talkingabout?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
All right.
Well, before we dive indirectly into it, we did get
some feedback, some not sopositive feedback, on how we
intro the topic One.
Some people said we were toogoof and not taking it seriously
enough.
Oh who, someone said that.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
I got some anonymous feedback Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Listen, this is, people take this seriously and
you guys are not introing itwith enough importance of how
impactful it could be, and soI'm really excited because I
think this person could have alot of feedback.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
but I wanted to clarify.
I actually don't disagree withthat feedback at all, so agree,
I would say we definitely wereyou should have a better
collection.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
We definitely were skeptical in the beginning of
like how is this going to go?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
So I was giving some clarification points.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah, I'm going to give you a little bit of
clarification that I was givenone, the test that we referenced
.
So there is like with this bookthere's an official test
because of course you know,books have to like sell things
and somehow make money ifthey're independent companies,
so they sell.
Basically a test.
If you buy the book you getlike a free code and that is
like the official test.
That does not include, or didnot originally include, physical
(05:01):
touch, but they added it afterbecause they got a lot of
feedback that actually said youknow what I can actually see
this one and that's why my mindhas been shifting a little bit
on that appreciation language,which is interesting.
So now the test includes that.
So the test that we took wasjust something random on the
internet that was found.
So what we took and what itgave us the results on might not
be accurate and we'll find theaccurate ones so we can actually
(05:22):
tell what we are, so we cantake it.
So that was one clarification.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
The second.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Thing that I thought was important that we didn't
really do in the beginning.
The intro of this topic isreally all this book is about is
it's a ways to communicateappreciation and encouragement
to others in the workplace, andit's not just about like
retention or like people beinghappy to work together, but it's
truly about appreciating othersand encouraging others, and so
(05:49):
it had like three points that Iactually thought were really
good.
When you think about this inthe workplace, certain
individuals will actually valueone language as their primary
and usually will have asecondary and sometimes they
even appreciate a third, butusually the first two are like
their main things that dominatethe majority of the appreciation
that they feel in the workplace.
The second is the mosteffective communication of
(06:11):
appreciation.
Encouragement happens when themessage is sent in the language
of appreciation most valued bythe receiver, which I think is
pretty obvious, becauseobviously you know you want to
give it in the way that theywant to receive it.
However, just like inrelationship love languages,
sometimes you actually want togive the same appreciation that
you appreciate, if that makessense.
(06:33):
So it's only natural to be likeI like getting gifts, so I'm
going to give Bruce a gift andyou might be like I don't care
about gifts, but that's thenatural human instinct thing to
do, but it's obviously not theright thing.
You need to think outwardly,not inwardly, as you're thinking
about showing appreciation.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Small aside.
I've experienced that beforewhere people would send me gifts
and I would.
I would get actually like upset, like please don't send me
gifts, I don't like this.
It's like I have to tell I'mlike I'm sorry, I really don't
like this.
So like please don't do it andlike I get that.
Okay, please don't do it and Iget that.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Yeah, yeah.
And then some people just don'tlike clutter.
It's like stop giving me, justrandom crap, I don't want this.
Where am I supposed to put this?
And you feel bad for throwingit away.
I totally get that.
And then the third note ismessages of appreciation,
encouragement and language isnot valued by the recipient,
will tend to miss the mark, likeyou just said.
I mean, but it's like if youdon't appreciate that and
someone doesn't, they're likeman.
(07:23):
I made Bruce feel great.
I got him this little plushything I found on the internet.
That was the exact, you know,movie character he liked.
Like actually you hated that,and it's missing the mark of
showing appreciation, eventhough you're trying to do a
nice thing.
So it's really important youthink outwardly and not inwardly
, as you're showing appreciation, and that's why we're going
through these, so you can try to, at the end, understand and
(07:45):
observe what is theirappreciation and try to discover
that, if you will, so that wayyou can communicate it properly.
So a couple of clarifications,but I thought it was all really
good kind of feedback and thingsto bring up at the beginning of
this.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Appreciate those clarifications and appreciate
the feedback from our anonymousdonor.
A question that you might ormight not have the answer to is
appreciation language in theworkplace the same as
appreciation language irl?
Speaker 2 (08:15):
or is it different?
You're thinking, is itdifferent?
Yeah, I think it's differentbecause I feel like you don't
think it is, uh, I think I, Iabsolutely think it is.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Um, you know, when I, when I meet my friends and fam
irl, I give them a hug, you knowI'll run my fingers through
your hair.
You know, whatever it takes tomake sure that you know I
appreciate you.
But if someone ever did that tome at work, oh I'd call hr.
So like I think thereabsolutely is a difference
(08:48):
between what you preferprofessionally and what you
prefer in all othernon-professional situations.
I just throwing that out thereas a question and uh, yeah, yeah
, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
That's interesting and, by the way, I want everyone
to know that even before thispodcast, he also told me he
would put his hands through myhair.
I just want everyone to knowthat that actually happened.
And now he's bringing it uphere like it's the first time.
It's the second time in like a10-minute span.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
It won't be the last time we're not going to do this
episode with at least like twomore mentions of fingers and
hair.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I'm so scared.
I actually, you know, somethinginteresting that I was thinking
about, too is, like, after weget through these, I think the
final episode of this we shouldgo through some of these
afterthoughts, like things thatcame to mind like is it
different?
Um, I had some other thingslike is it kind of skewed based
on the type of job you do?
A little bit, or like yourcompensation level, potentially,
I don't know.
And then I also had how do youactually discover your
(09:50):
co-workers appreciation language.
I think that'll be reallyimportant to talk about, because
that will help you kind offigure out how to implement
something like this in yourday-to-day life.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Love it.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I think it's a great idea.
You're ready to jump in.
You want to start with qualitytime.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
I'm ready, let's do it.
You know we spend a lot of timetogether.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
We sure do, and I appreciate it.
I appreciate the time we spendtogether.
Yeah, yeah, I would agree.
I would agree it's good time.
Quality time, like personally,is pretty easy to understand.
It's like we spend timetogether doing this.
We also spend time togetherdoing other things.
You spend time together withfamily, like people who really
appreciate it kind of make apoint to spend time with others.
(10:34):
But in the workplace, like Ithink there's different aspects
of quality time, or I think thebook said something around like
they coined it, as dialects ofquality time and I'll give you a
few, because I think it'll besomething around like they
coined it, as dialects ofquality time and I'll give you a
few because I think it'll beinteresting to kind of talk
through them and some I didn'teven really think about.
But the couple that they namedspecifically were focused
(10:54):
attention, quality conversation,a shared experience, working
with coworkers on a task orsmall group dialogue, working
with coworkers on a task orsmall group dialogue, and all of
those are importantly, you know, distinctual, because you might
want quality time but not inthe sense of like I need more
(11:14):
one-on-one time with Bruce, butit's like I actually like I
would love if we went and bowledtogether as a shared experience
and that is way more fun for meand something I would really
enjoy to bond with my coworkersand I would feel appreciated.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
So interesting because now I'm starting to, I
already agree with anonymousdonors feedback.
But now I'm like, well, yes,absolutely, that test was
botched, because I love doingone on one or or small group
projects, either virtually or inperson, where, like, we're
going to get together and we'regoing to, you know, all of our
(11:49):
brains are going to work on aproject at the same time in a
room, all things firing, like.
I did that yesterday with myteammates and we accomplished
some great stuff and I felt goodafterwards, I'm sure.
Well, I hope they felt good too, hope they appreciated the
quality time.
But, like, that to me is greatand I I do like doing that sort
of thing.
But going bowling with mycoworkers makes me want to look
(12:14):
for a way to injure myself so Inever have to do it again.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Yeah, yeah, you could .
I think that's a really goodpoint.
It's like, when you look at it,it's interesting because it's
almost like a shared thingyou're doing, it's a shared
experience, or like working on adirect task, but you basically
are delineating.
I want to keep it work related,not get it outside of work.
And like that is an importantdistinction, because some people
(12:38):
just like to go grab a beer,blow off steam, but I think what
you're saying is like.
I agree with that, even thoughquality time wasn't ranked high
on the test that we took, whichnow we know is botched, so we
won't reference it too muchanymore.
But I do love exactly whatyou're saying, like my one on
ones that I spend likeworkshopping something with
someone I feel like are some ofmy favorites because, like we
(13:00):
just get to brainstorm togetherand I don't do that a lot with
smart people Every single day.
It's like I normally justattending meetings, project
updates, making decisions,whatever, but actually like
doing a workshop with somebodyand putting our brains together
is one of the coolest things.
I think that is a generalincorporate.
It's just a ton of fun that's.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
That's.
My favorite kind of work isworking session work, like you
get one or you get two or threelike good brains in a room and
you solve a problem and you walk.
It's so funny because usuallywhen those things happen, you
walk out having accomplishedsomething which you might not
have been able to do in thatsame amount of time on your own.
I almost guarantee you wouldn'tbe able to do it.
(13:40):
And like the result is alwaysbetter because it's more brains
in the problem, but you're notsegmenting it over email or a
chat or like it's it's real time, like that's.
That's the good stuff for me.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
Yeah, yeah, that's the type of activity I always
talked about, like managing yourenergy, not necessarily your
time, and it's like I know I gettired in the afternoon and
having a session like that inthe afternoon, I'm like I'm so
energized because I'm like thatwas incredibly fun.
It was high energy, we wereproductive in what we were
trying to do and I feel, like,to your point, like we came out
with a better result than Icould have done on my own,
either because we got further orbecause, like the power of our
(14:14):
brains together, the product wasactually more refined that we
ended with, which is one of thecoolest things to do.
So I'm right there with you.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yeah, that's my favorite kind of quality time.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Yeah, yeah, I agree, and it's interesting too because
and I think about this becauseI have a relatively large team,
I think I have like 16, 17people now, and so the fact that
you don't know is scary, justby the way.
Yeah, we're actively hiring oneperson, so I can't remember did
we officially send an offer ornot?
Hopefully they accept.
Um, but I was thinking aboutlike sometimes I view employees
(14:47):
of mine as like needy if they'relike, hey, can we like just jam
on this for a while, becauseI'm like, yeah, you can do it on
your own and I don't have thetime to like jam with 17 people
every single day on somethinglike you got to find other
people to do that with.
And then I, when I think aboutit more, it's like it's probably
because their appreciationlanguage is like getting that
time to work together onsomething like they would feel
(15:08):
appreciated if I did that.
Because I'm not taking the timeto do it, they're probably
feeling less appreciated, whichis really interesting to think
about.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
That was.
That was my next question isyou know, I clearly like quality
time or jam sessions as like a,as a sub qualification of
quality time.
Like quality time or jamsessions as like a as a sub
qualification of quality time,but like what, if I like this,
but the person I don't know orthat I'm working with, I don't
know if they like this or notLike.
What's the strategy there?
How do you, how do you ensurethat my appreciation isn't
(15:37):
clashing with their appreciation?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
no-transcript.
Okay, I feel like they'reinterested in this.
Or if they're just hold up ontheir own every day, it's like
they probably wouldn't likesomething like this.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Do you think it's inappropriate, like if we ever
find a good test, to run it withour teams?
Speaker 2 (16:20):
That's the hard part, I think and the book even talks
about that Is it like?
It feels almost like it's atask or a chore to like force
people to do it?
But you know this, you'veattended leadership trainings.
It's like they always get youto do like the Myers-Briggs or
the strength assessments, orlike you're always forced to do
those or whatever.
True colors is another one, andthen you bring it to like the
(16:43):
session and you put it on alittle plaque in front of you so
everyone knows if you're red,blue, green, whatever it's like
they kind of do that yeah, I'vebeen in a few of those and I'm
like I still don't reallyunderstand the color thing.
But it helps you like engagewith people, so like I get that
and it might be interesting insome settings where it's totally
appropriate.
Um, but sometimes asking isawkward, like me going up to you
(17:04):
and be like, hey, do you reallyfeel appreciated when we jam
together?
Like it's just an awkwardquestion.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
That's why I'm wondering, like, if I approach
it from a, like assuming we canfind a good survey, or like a
good test, like if I said, hey,I took this and I learned
something about myself and Iwill just straight up tell you,
you know, for me it's uh, wordsof, or it's um acts of service,
dang it, acts of service, thankyou, it's acts of service and
(17:32):
words of affirmation for me.
Uh, so you guys know, like whatI like, I would love if you
took the test so I know what youlike.
That way I don't find myselfdoing the wrong thing for you.
Like, you know, if I approachit from a this way, I never put
you through something you don'twant to go through.
Like, is that the approach?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's interesting.
It's like do you do thatupfront and you just ask your
team to do it, so you're allkind of on the same page, and
then some people will be like,ah, this is some you know,
stupid woo, woo, new age typestuff, why do I need to do this?
But some people might getreally engaged and be like you
know what?
I think this would be awesome.
(18:11):
And you try to figure out.
And when people ask, hey,you're really great at
connecting with people andworking with others, how do you
do it?
Then you can kind of naturallybring the topic up.
But I don't know.
I'm kind of with you.
I'd rather just ask my wholeteam it's not that big, you're
like guys.
It will take like five minutes.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
Take the test.
If you don't feel comfortabledoing it, don't do it, but like,
yeah, this is, this is for meto help you when it comes to how
we recognize and appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
Yeah yeah, I agree.
Yeah, another couple ofstrategies they gave and we 'll
dive into it more towards theend but is like, obviously,
observing is one.
If someone's always asking like, hey, how did?
How was the report that I gaveyou?
Like they're probably lookingfor words of affirmation to be
like, yeah, you did great, thatwas so awesome.
Like they're fishing for thatcompliment a little bit.
And the other thing is also tolisten to their complaints.
(19:00):
I guess someone's kind oftalking and be like man, this
person just really won't maketime to like meet with me and
talk about this.
They're probably quality time.
You know they want to meet withothers and they appreciate when
other people take the time tomeet with them.
So it gave you some really likeinteresting ways to handle it.
And I think the last one, whichI thought was interesting too,
was ask how they're encouraged.
Be like, hey, when you'refeeling discouraged or you're
(19:20):
feeling like you can't dosomething, what really excites
you or encourages you to kind ofpick things back up and get
started again, and that might bean interesting way to ask it
where it doesn't feel so awkward.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Yeah, I liked all those avenues because I was like
that's interesting.
But to your point, like with abig team, it's hard to observe
and like figure out exactly.
Like figuring out which of thefive are you and I'm going to
put post-its on a wall and kindof map where Bruce sits, like
based on your day-to-dayinteractions, it just sounds too
complicated.
Just saying hey, take afive-minute test, sounds way
easier I'm.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I'm far too stupid slash lazy to be able to do that
for my team.
Yeah, so I know I gotta, Igotta, use the test I feel, like
I'm literally thinking about myteam and I'm like I think I
could.
I think I could tell youexactly what each of them liked.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
So yeah, maybe I'm half as stupid as I thought I
was I feel like both of ouroffices, like we're gonna look
like charlie from always sunnyand the mean like where he's got
all the red lines goingeverywhere.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
But it's not Pepe Sylvia, it's the appreciation
language.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yes, it's each of your team members and their
appreciation language.
So, going back to quality time,yeah, I was trying to think
about like focused attention,like some people just want like
focused time to work with you onthings and I can tell you, like
my direct reports, there's somethat I can tackle everything I
need in like two weeks with themin like a 30 minute session,
(20:48):
and then there's some where itjust they, they want to talk
about everything.
It's like I need a couple ofhours with you every week to
like work through things.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
And for me cause.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I don't think this is my top one, like it's hard for
me Cause I'm like I canprioritize my time doing
something else, but of course Iwant to be empathetic, I want to
listen to them, I want to bethere for them, so like I make
the time.
But it's really interestingbecause this helped me figure
out.
It's like this person justwants focused attention with me
to work through things, andthat's how they're going to feel
appreciated, and when I getmore distant, they probably feel
(21:18):
less appreciated.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
So what are the breakdowns?
For quality time?
It's focused attention.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Focused attention, quality conversation, which I
take as could be just more thansurface level of like man.
Yeah, the weather man so crappytoday, but it's like actually
like in depth.
Yeah, I heard your dog wasgoing to college, like when's it
supposed to graduate, kind ofthing, exactly.
Yeah, like what color down areyou giving him, what kind of
treats?
Yeah, I think they wouldappreciate that he's getting the
(21:47):
good boy.
Uh, scholarship yeah thescholarship full ride, full ride
, good boy.
Scholarship.
Uh, shared experience.
So this is like something thatyou'd go and do together like,
okay, full ride, good boy.
Scholarship.
Shared experience so this islike something that you'd go and
do together, like bowling, graba beer, like shared, something
that you're doing together,working with coworkers on a task
(22:09):
, and then small group dialogue.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
How is working with coworkers on tasks?
Not I, uh, I guess qualityconversation are you thinking
like shared experience yeah,well, yeah, but I mean, shared
experience that's, that's likebowling, right, like so I guess.
Yeah, working with co-workersand tasks, the shared experience
work addition and what was thelast one right um, that is small
group dialogue so we get agroup together but you're not
(22:35):
necessarily working on something.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
You're just like water cooler, chatting people
okay, let's get together as ateam it's my team every week.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Yeah, that's what we literally do that every week
yeah, yeah, yeah, it's funny.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I used to have a a weekly or bi-weekly team meeting
and I got feedback from my team.
They're just like hey, yeah,this feels like it was mainly my
more senior managers.
They're like feels like it'stoo productive, like we're kind
of just getting around andchatting, like do you think we
can make this monthly?
Speaker 1 (23:00):
I'm like yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
This is for you guys, so I don't care how frequent it
is.
And then they all got feedbackfrom their teams that they
wanted to have the 30 minutebi-weekly meeting because they
appreciated getting to just chat, that's funny, that's funny
funny yeah, I, I know my teamloves our weekly team meeting
because it's where all the teacomes out.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
So it's like, oh, I gotta, I gotta know, I gotta
know what's up.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
So like that, you want to know what's up you gotta
go to that meeting, yeah andthat helps you connect them like
human level too, because whatyou said is like you're taking
it out of work and you're kindof relating to them on a human
level, because you're likeeveryone's feeling this and this
is our opportunity to talk ittogether yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Uh, it's vegas rules in my team meeting, so yeah yeah
, I like that.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, um, and then, like, the next aspect of this
was to each one of these things,you know, there's a who, when,
where, how, and we're kind oftalking about that right now.
It's like for like quality timeor focused attention.
It's like focused attention,quality conversation Is it us
getting together and liketalking about non-work stuff?
Is it just spending time so youcan talk about your work and
(24:07):
things ongoing, like who needsto be involved?
Where is this Like?
Is this just one-on-one in anoffice or something?
Or in a conference room?
Where?
So?
Is it in the workplace?
Is it out of the workplace?
And then, how do you actuallygo about it?
So, like what is happeningthroughout that conversation,
and like each of these thingskind of has different, each one
of those of people where whatthey might appreciate and what
(24:30):
they might not appreciate asmuch, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
This is really weird because, compared to last week's
words of affirmation, words ofaffirmation was very structured,
right, like it was.
It was very much a.
You have to acknowledge thework the person did and you have
to give them like almost alittle exposition on why you're
giving the affirmation.
It can't just be clark thanksfor doing this, like it's got to
(24:55):
be.
You did this because, or likeyou did this and we needed it.
And here's the outcome and noone else could do this.
Thank god for you.
You've been putting this getthis earth specifically for this
task.
If not for you, then who?
Uh, like it was, it was veryformulaic and like this is not
that at all.
This is very variable, right,like.
(25:16):
Is it work related or is it notwork related?
Is it in the office, is it outof the office?
Is it one-on-one or is it group?
Like this almost feels likesome.
Like it is the Pepe Silviaboard.
Like I need to figure out, likespecifically, all these
different variables before I doany kind of quality time with
someone, or else they mightthink I'm a total jerk.
(25:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
Yeah, this one for me .
I was struggling too, becauseI'm just like man that's so many
to your point, like so manyvariables, how can you possibly
accommodate all those?
And like you can't, frankly,like you really can't try and
experiment with everyone to belike, okay, did they like this,
did they not like this?
To your point, will become thePepe Silvia board.
So you definitely can't do thatand that's why I think you've
got to come up with a better wayto discover this one and figure
(26:00):
out what they truly like.
Two tests yeah, maybe Osamawill give you two tests.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
If you get quality time on test one, then you're
taking a second test and I'msorry, but that's the rules.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
We'll do it together.
It'll be quality time for us todo together this test.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, both, both parties have to do it in this
case, because if they do it andthey're like, yeah, I like pizza
in a group in the office, butI'm like, and I hate pizza in
the office with one on oneperson, like it's, like yo,
we're not a fit, like this isn'tgoing to work.
We got to switch it up and dolike words of affirmation or
something, because like, nah,this ain't it.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Yeah, this one, I was almost thinking is it just
because we're humans and we'repeople?
Yes, that's why this one's sohard, because, like, I love
being in a small group chattingabout some just random crap in
our lives and the last TV showthat happened and all that, but
I hate when Bruce is there.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
You, know what I mean .
Speaker 2 (27:03):
That's a very human thing to be like.
It's going to ruin the wholevibe and it ruined my whole vibe
and I no longer want toappreciate.
I don't feel appreciated withthe small group conversations if
Bruce is there, because youknow that's how people think
about it.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
This is a throwback.
We're going to go back in time10 plus years.
You already know where this isgoing.
We used to do a lean coffee inour office and it was a really
fun thing.
That was only semi-work related,but lean coffee is basically an
agenda agenda list meetingwhere you show up, you put
(27:39):
stickies on the table and thenyou kind of do like a almost
like a scrum con bond forconversation and it was really
fun.
Like we talk about game ofThrones, cause that was popular
at the time.
We talk about like movies,games, programming, talk about
work, occasionally, likewhatever made it onto the thing
we voted, and then we decidedthat's the next thing we're
going to talk about.
Right, like some people wouldcome in the break when we were
(28:00):
doing this and like you'd almostthey'd do that.
Like oh, the peasants aretalking again.
Yes, hmm, I wouldn't be joiningthem for a skinny latte or
whatever they call it.
Like you could just tell thatwas the vibe.
And now, thinking backretrospectively, it it's like
well, no, they don't appreciatequality time.
Yeah, that's.
Yeah, they're seeing that as anabsolute waste and we're a
(28:22):
bunch of idiots.
But like, yeah, truly, you knowit's, it's just funny.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I mean that session, to your like, of us not thinking
about quality time being ourtop.
Like you brought up jammingwith someone on something that
is quality time and youappreciate it.
The lean coffee was like smallgroup dialogue that wasn't
necessarily about work the mostof the time and, like to your
point, that is a quality timeattribute.
And exactly to your point, Iremember people coming in and be
(28:47):
like that's a waste of time.
I've got work to do and it'slike well no, for me.
It motivated me to work harderbecause I appreciated and wanted
to help the people around meand it also made me more
informed about things that mayor may not be work-related, but
helped me connect with someoneon a personal level and that
made me more effective in theworkplace, and so I got a ton of
value out of those.
(29:07):
I look back and like those weresome of the most fun meetings I
think we had in that time ofour work careers.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
And I'm starting to realize in this whole effort you
know, came in a skeptic, cameout a believer the thing is,
with words of affirmation andquality time, if you are able to
identify and do thisappropriately and correctly, you
can absolutely improve themorale of the person at the
other side of the conversation.
So, like you know, what somepeople thought was stupid, like
(29:35):
lean coffee, probably kept ushappy and motivated and working
and we didn't even realize thatwe were just like this is just a
fun thing, but it's like no, welooked forward to every
Wednesday morning at ninebecause, like that was, that was
the time for that and our workprobably benefited from it
because that's our appreciationlanguage.
Yeah, 100 percent, and like youcan absolutely use this to game
(29:56):
people, you know?
Speaker 2 (29:57):
Yeah, a hundred percent and like you can
absolutely use this to gamepeople, you know, yeah, yeah,
that's like something that thebook goes into later is like
don't think this is some evilcorporate thing about like
retaining people.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But it kind of is.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
It could be, though they even acknowledge it.
They're like, yeah, you couldtotally see it as that, but it's
really not supposed to be that.
It's just about being andworking together at a human
level.
Yeah, so it's interesting toyour point though, cause, like
when you think about thosethings, you're like I did
probably stay longer at thatcompany than I probably needed
to, because that's what that wasfun, and I enjoyed it and I
(30:27):
felt encouraged and like that'swhat gave me energy to keep
doing the work I was doing everysingle day.
And so when you think about itin like hindsight, you're just
like holy cow, like that made abig difference to my happiness
at work.
Well, it's.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
It's kind of sad because, yes, you could use this
nefariously, but like let's.
Let's just think through this.
Like, logically, right Companydecides we're all in on
appreciation and we're going towe're going to use this book,
we're going to use this test,we're going to identify and
we're going to optimize forappreciation with our employees,
(31:00):
train people on it, make ithappen, because this is going to
produce better work.
What's the negative of this?
Right?
Like they get better, they getbetter outcomes.
The individual contributors,like you and me, were like I
love working here.
This place appreciates me.
I want to work harder.
Like it really is.
Even in the most nefarious case, if you are delivering on what
(31:23):
the employee wants, it's goingto create a net positive for
both parties.
Like I see no way this couldactually be used for true evil.
It's almost like lawful evil,but it's still good for everyone
.
So I don't know I'm becoming abeliever of this whole thing
until we get to touching andthen I'm out of here.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Yeah, and then touching.
We got to tread lightly becauseit gets real dangerous.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
We need.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
HR.
Hr enters the chat for thatconversation.
But yeah, I agree with you,it's hard to see how this could
go poorly, and I think the wayit goes poorly is because of
people trying to be greedy, getahead in their career.
They're going to figure outways to do this or ways to game
the system to say, well, I needto feel appreciated by getting
(32:10):
promoted.
And this person didn't make mefeel appreciated because Bruce
assumed that my language wassomething else and then it
wasn't, and he shouldn't getpromoted.
I should get promoted.
Like you know, that's going tohappen, or?
Speaker 1 (32:21):
they're like well, we're meeting your appreciation
language.
You don't need a pay raise thisyear.
Like you can see the cracks.
But I feel like if it's at thatlevel, you should have been
gone a year ago.
Like you should have been gonea year ago.
Like you should have seen that,that flashing train lights in
the distance and gotten out waysooner.
(32:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
Yeah, yeah.
I think this is one of thosethings that the reason
corporations don't do it isbecause it's hard, it is hard,
it's not easy.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
It requires care and attention and evaluation, which
are three words thatcorporations absolutely despise.
So, yeah, it's not going tohappen.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Yeah, it's so funny too, because at the end of the
day, it's going to help yourbottom line.
If you do this, you're going toattain and attract great people
.
Everyone's going to be happy.
Therefore, working harder andspending more time like this
will help in the longterm.
And so it's so sad to say whatwe're saying, but it is one of
those things that it's likewhat's what's easy for a
corporation.
Throw out a reward program thatif you get so many points, you
(33:25):
get a $10 gift card to best buy,like that's easy, that's the
easy cop out way to do it.
The right way to do it issomething like this Well, this,
well, I'm here.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
I'm very curious about the gifts episode.
Like I really want to know thedeets on that.
No spoilers, but like nospoilers, that's that probably
more than touching for me.
I I'm just give me the deets ongifts because I I associate
gifts with I'm giving you a gift, so I don't have to give you a
raise.
I'm giving you a gift becauseyou did crunch over the weekend,
or something like here's yourpizza, thanks, thanks for you
(33:58):
know, bleeding sweat throughyour veins, uh like it is, I'm
interested.
Yeah, I, I'm interested.
But you know, I truly believeif companies did this with the
right intent, like personallyspeaking, if I knew that a
company was going to evaluateeveryone's appreciation language
and make it an effort to dobetter, I would take a pay cut
(34:21):
to go work at that companybecause I would know that they
were invested in retention andkeeping their employees happy
and ensuring it's like a goodworkplace environment.
Like I would work for less forthat.
You know, like that's that thatincreases, hypothetically
speaking, that increases youractual longevity, right, Because
(34:41):
if you're less stressed, if youare burning yourself less
because you like your workenvironment and you feel like it
is a place where you'reappreciated, then you're not
thinking am I going to lose myjob?
Am I going to you know, like,how am I going to make you know,
next year work here?
Like I think it?
Just you get into a cycle ofpositivity and it would lead to
a much better result.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I 100% agree with you .
Yeah, yeah, I think the theactual like implementation of
this.
Imagine, if you're imagine, ifyou're interviewing to go to
this company and you're like,well, what's like the culture,
like in, like a gold starcompany would be like.
You know, something that webelieve in is that everybody has
a primary and a secondaryappreciation language to feel
(35:23):
encouraged in the workplace andlike.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Imagine hearing that when you're interviewing and
you're like I hear thatinterview and I'm like, can I
just work for great?
Can that when you'reinterviewing and they're like,
bro, I hear that in an interviewand I'm like can I just work
for free?
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Can I start today?
At that point I'm sending aresignation note to my boss and
I'm like I'm out, I got anotherjob.
But eventually I carried thatto be like, yeah, mine is acts
of service and, like my teamknows that, like this is my
primary appreciation languageand they help like me, they help
appreciate me by doing doingthat language and we have
guidelines and rules around thatof how you can do that in a way
(35:53):
that, uh, you know, fits insideof our corporate structure.
And like how cool would that beto hear.
Like that's something that'sbeen implemented all the way
down to whoever you're talkingto and they take it seriously
and that's the way they work Iwould die happy, uh, like I've
been.
Speaker 1 (36:09):
I've been work heaven .
Are you crying?
Speaker 2 (36:11):
I see a tear just it can't be real.
It can't be real you know thisgoes to your quality time, where
we started this as a tasktogether to talk about this next
appreciation language.
We jammed on it and we gotexcited.
I feel like I could run througha wall right now.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
I could literally punch through steel plates with
my fist.
No glove, just straight through, right this second, five
minutes from now.
No, because the feeling'scoming down.
But if there was a steel platethat I could punch through with
my fist bare fist, right now,I'd do it.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Honestly, I'm in danger to those around me
because I feel like One Punchman right now.
You're glowing, you're glowing.
I could hit somebody and theycould die immediately.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
I'm afraid to run my fingers through your hair for
fear they might get singed fromthe glow.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Please, no, please, no.
We need the physical touch.
We need the physical touchepisode.
Yesterday I got him well,that's, that's quality time.
Um, we have three more, whichyou already alluded to acts of
service, tangible gifts and aphysical touch and then we got
like a wrap-up episode.
So that's what's coming next,not necessarily in that order.
(37:31):
We can really go whatever orderwe want.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
So okay, all right.
Well, uh, don't tell me nospoilers, I'm very excited for
next week, uh.
So don't tease it, don't giveme a hint, because I don't want
to know.
But I do want to know, just alittle hint.
Just give me a little hint,like just a tiny, tiny little
hint, you sure?
No, I don't want to knowanymore.
I've changed my mind.
I mean, okay, I won't tell youwhat if.
(37:53):
What if my love language issurprise?
What if I like surprise?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
my love language depends on the day on.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
On tuesdays I'm all about surprise, but on thursdays
it's all spoilers.
I don't want anything but knownexpectations.
That's it.
That's it.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
Fridays physical touch all day.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
No fun day Friday baby more like fondle Friday, am
I right?
Ooh, oh gross.
Look out for suitcases.
Look out for those suitcases.
They don't.
They don't appreciate thephysical touch and neither does
(38:41):
the owner of that suitcase.
Just FYI, you creep out there.
Well, thank you, clark.
Once again, I really appreciateyou taking point on this and
making this happen.
Maybe we should hang out laterand, you know, spend some
quality time together, just as alittle reward for the work
you've done here.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
Maybe some shared activity would be fun, like
sipping acai balls through astraw.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
It's not acai, but yeah, yeah, close enough, close
enough.
What is it again?
I already forgot.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Tapioca.
That's what it is tapioca,that's what day I've had.
I can't differentiate betweenthe two.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
I want some pure diabetes water with tapioca soup
at the bottom, through a strawfour times as big, adding four
times as much plastic to theenvironment, please, and I want
to pay $11 for this drink.
So plastic to the environment,please, and I want to pay $11
for this drink.
So let's make it happentogether, shall we?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Some ungodly amount.
I'm right there with you.
I just heard a clock.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
I just heard a clock.
Yeah, it's my clock.
We talked about that before,haven't we?
We talked about my clock.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
I mean, usually your mic cuts it out, but this time
no.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
I heard it.
It's because I'm talking whilethe clock is chiming.
That's why.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
It's a good signal, though, Like hey, this is the
end of your work day.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Cut it off.
Cut it off.
No, I mean it chimes every houruntil 10 o'clock at night, and
then it stops chiming.
Nice, I like that I have alovely picture on my clock of a.
It looks like a StudioGhibli-esque animated field.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
It's gorgeous they made it field.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
It's gorgeous and there's little butterflies in
the background.
Oh, wow, you have to shoot me apicture right now.
Yeah, yeah, it's great.
I love, love it.
It's kleido.
Clock shout out, kleido.
Yeah, not sponsored.
If not sponsored, if.
If you want to join our notsponsored discord again, go to
the show notes.
We also have swag.
If you ever want to like wear acorporate strategy shirt around
, you could do that through ourspread shop.
(40:31):
You can get a link to podcastson other platforms.
You can go to our website.
There's so many things you cando.
It's all in the show notes, inthe all the links link tree.
Click that, check it out.
But, importantly, the mostimportant thing you can do is
share this podcast with yourfriends, family, loved ones and
the people you hate the most,because it doesn't matter what
side of the fence you fall on.
If you think this is the bestpodcast on the planet, friends.
(40:53):
If you hate it, enemies.
But guess what?
Your enemies are our friendsand we want them here.
So please share, please leaveus a review.
We would so appreciate that.
This is a word-of-mouthmarketing podcast, because we
are weirdos who hide ouridentities, so you have to do
the work for us.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Thank you for doing that by the way, we appreciate
you, Clark, for your constantsupport and continued
encouragement of this podcast.
Everybody in the Discord weappreciate you for always being
there for us and being soconsistent, even though
sometimes we can be inconsistent.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
So thank you, yeah that was really good, that that
followed all of the rules Goodjob.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
I'm looking back at the rules.
The rules were affirmation ofcharacter, praise for
personality traits.
We nailed it Great job.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
You did, you did.
Uh, and that wraps up yetanother episode of corporate
strategy podcast.
It could have been an email.
Make sure that you affirm yourwords and quality your time.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark andyou're on mute.
We'll see you next week.
I just want to take the time to thank Clark, my
podcast co-host, for all thegood things he brings to every
podcast that I couldn't dospecifically.
I suck at creating content anddriving compelling podcast
material, and without Clark Itruly believe this podcast would
(00:23):
have ended on episode six.
So thanks, Clark, foreverything you do.
Thank you, Bruce.
How's that?
How's that?
I?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
feel really appreciated because of you,
because I am words ofaffirmation, which is the first
appreciation language in theworkplace.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
That's your thing and that's what we talked about
last episode, so if you didn'tlisten to that, go back.
Actually, there's two episodeson our series of appreciation,
so go listen to those.
This is the third.
On the second topic of thisseries, welcome back to
Corporate Strategy Podcast.
Put in an email.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark andlet's get into it.
(01:11):
We did a survey in our Discord,which you haven't seen yet,
have you Clark?
No, I haven't seen the survey.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
I did not participate in the survey because I was
cute.
Well, one I was, I was.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I was a broad.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Actually, no, no, no wait.
I think I popped in there.
I think I popped in there anddid something because I wanted
to participate.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
I'm not okay, well, thank you but I'll figure it out
I appreciate your participation.
I mean, to be fair, you did makethe survey, I just copy pasted
it.
So in the on our discord, whichyou can join by going into the
show notes and clicking join ourdiscord, uh, we have a
marketing you channel which isfocused on uh, sharing job ideas
and and sharing you knowpersonality types.
I thought this is kind of theperfect place to put a survey
about which appreciationlanguage you feel most valued at
(01:48):
Interesting.
So, of the choices, if this isyour first episode listening,
you can go with words ofaffirmation, which is our last
episode.
Acts of service, quality time,which we're talking about today,
tangible gifts or appropriatephysical touch, and do you know
what the most picked?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
one was clark if you tell me physical touch, I'm
going to flip my leg.
Oh I would not.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
I would have quit the podcast like 169.
It would have been the lastepisode.
I would have shut down thediscord because we have nothing
but freaks in there and youwould have never heard from
bruce and clark again.
Thank god, uh, no way no one,literally no one.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Interesting, interesting, okay, I I think
access service might be first.
Then that's my hunch, you are100.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Correct access service had seven votes.
Words of affirmation Well, sixvotes, sorry, because there's
always one.
So words of affirmation twoQuality time none.
Tangible gifts one and none forphysical touch Appropriate
physical touch.
So thank you to our Discordcommunity for participating in
(02:58):
the poll.
It's good information.
I myself am an acts of serviceperson, so I get it, I agree,
and I'm excited to get ofservice person.
So I get it, I agree, and I'mexcited to get to that episode.
But that's not what we'retalking about today.
You know it'll be interesting.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Yeah, unfortunately we're not quite there yet.
It'll be interesting like afterwe explain them, because I can
tell you like reading this book,I definitely have changed my
thinking on some of these somuch so that I can actually kind
of see physical touch.
We're going to get there.
But spoiler.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think it's going to be a really good discussion and
we might change some people'sminds we're going to run a poll
after the series ends maybe acouple weeks after someone has a
chance to listen to theepisodes and we'll do the same
questions plus a.
Did you change your answer?
So I'm very curious, once weget through this, to see how
this shakes out.
But today you're gonna have toeducate me because again I'm the
(03:51):
moron in the room.
Here.
You are the expert.
What the heck are we talkingabout?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
All right.
Well, before we dive indirectly into it, we did get
some feedback, some not sopositive feedback, on how we
intro the topic One.
Some people said we were toogoof and not taking it seriously
enough.
Oh who, someone said that.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
I got some anonymous feedback Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Listen, this is, people take this seriously and
you guys are not introing itwith enough importance of how
impactful it could be, and soI'm really excited because I
think this person could have alot of feedback.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
but I wanted to clarify.
I actually don't disagree withthat feedback at all, so agree,
I would say we definitely wereyou should have a better
collection.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
We definitely were skeptical in the beginning of
like how is this going to go?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
So I was giving some clarification points.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah, I'm going to give you a little bit of
clarification that I was givenone, the test that we referenced
.
So there is like with this bookthere's an official test
because of course you know,books have to like sell things
and somehow make money ifthey're independent companies,
so they sell.
Basically a test.
If you buy the book you getlike a free code and that is
like the official test.
That does not include, or didnot originally include, physical
(05:01):
touch, but they added it afterbecause they got a lot of
feedback that actually said youknow what I can actually see
this one and that's why my mindhas been shifting a little bit
on that appreciation language,which is interesting.
So now the test includes that.
So the test that we took wasjust something random on the
internet that was found.
So what we took and what itgave us the results on might not
be accurate and we'll find theaccurate ones so we can actually
(05:22):
tell what we are, so we cantake it.
So that was one clarification.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
The second.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Thing that I thought was important that we didn't
really do in the beginning.
The intro of this topic isreally all this book is about is
it's a ways to communicateappreciation and encouragement
to others in the workplace, andit's not just about like
retention or like people beinghappy to work together, but it's
truly about appreciating othersand encouraging others, and so
(05:49):
it had like three points that Iactually thought were really
good.
When you think about this inthe workplace, certain
individuals will actually valueone language as their primary
and usually will have asecondary and sometimes they
even appreciate a third, butusually the first two are like
their main things that dominatethe majority of the appreciation
that they feel in the workplace.
The second is the mosteffective communication of
(06:11):
appreciation.
Encouragement happens when themessage is sent in the language
of appreciation most valued bythe receiver, which I think is
pretty obvious, becauseobviously you know you want to
give it in the way that theywant to receive it.
However, just like inrelationship love languages,
sometimes you actually want togive the same appreciation that
you appreciate, if that makessense.
(06:33):
So it's only natural to be likeI like getting gifts, so I'm
going to give Bruce a gift andyou might be like I don't care
about gifts, but that's thenatural human instinct thing to
do, but it's obviously not theright thing.
You need to think outwardly,not inwardly, as you're thinking
about showing appreciation.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Small aside.
I've experienced that beforewhere people would send me gifts
and I would.
I would get actually like upset, like please don't send me
gifts, I don't like this.
It's like I have to tell I'mlike I'm sorry, I really don't
like this.
So like please don't do it andlike I get that.
Okay, please don't do it and Iget that.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Yeah, yeah.
And then some people just don'tlike clutter.
It's like stop giving me, justrandom crap, I don't want this.
Where am I supposed to put this?
And you feel bad for throwingit away.
I totally get that.
And then the third note ismessages of appreciation,
encouragement and language isnot valued by the recipient,
will tend to miss the mark, likeyou just said.
I mean, but it's like if youdon't appreciate that and
someone doesn't, they're likeman.
(07:23):
I made Bruce feel great.
I got him this little plushything I found on the internet.
That was the exact, you know,movie character he liked.
Like actually you hated that,and it's missing the mark of
showing appreciation, eventhough you're trying to do a
nice thing.
So it's really important youthink outwardly and not inwardly
, as you're showing appreciation, and that's why we're going
through these, so you can try to, at the end, understand and
(07:45):
observe what is theirappreciation and try to discover
that, if you will, so that wayyou can communicate it properly.
So a couple of clarifications,but I thought it was all really
good kind of feedback and thingsto bring up at the beginning of
this.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Appreciate those clarifications and appreciate
the feedback from our anonymousdonor.
A question that you might ormight not have the answer to is
appreciation language in theworkplace the same as
appreciation language irl?
Speaker 2 (08:15):
or is it different?
You're thinking, is itdifferent?
Yeah, I think it's differentbecause I feel like you don't
think it is, uh, I think I, Iabsolutely think it is.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Um, you know, when I, when I meet my friends and fam
irl, I give them a hug, you knowI'll run my fingers through
your hair.
You know, whatever it takes tomake sure that you know I
appreciate you.
But if someone ever did that tome at work, oh I'd call hr.
So like I think thereabsolutely is a difference
(08:48):
between what you preferprofessionally and what you
prefer in all othernon-professional situations.
I just throwing that out thereas a question and uh, yeah, yeah
, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
That's interesting and, by the way, I want everyone
to know that even before thispodcast, he also told me he
would put his hands through myhair.
I just want everyone to knowthat that actually happened.
And now he's bringing it uphere like it's the first time.
It's the second time in like a10-minute span.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
It won't be the last time we're not going to do this
episode with at least like twomore mentions of fingers and
hair.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I'm so scared.
I actually, you know, somethinginteresting that I was thinking
about, too is, like, after weget through these, I think the
final episode of this we shouldgo through some of these
afterthoughts, like things thatcame to mind like is it
different?
Um, I had some other thingslike is it kind of skewed based
on the type of job you do?
A little bit, or like yourcompensation level, potentially,
I don't know.
And then I also had how do youactually discover your
(09:50):
co-workers appreciation language.
I think that'll be reallyimportant to talk about, because
that will help you kind offigure out how to implement
something like this in yourday-to-day life.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Love it.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I think it's a great idea.
You're ready to jump in.
You want to start with qualitytime.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
I'm ready, let's do it.
You know we spend a lot of timetogether.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
We sure do, and I appreciate it.
I appreciate the time we spendtogether.
Yeah, yeah, I would agree.
I would agree it's good time.
Quality time, like personally,is pretty easy to understand.
It's like we spend timetogether doing this.
We also spend time togetherdoing other things.
You spend time together withfamily, like people who really
appreciate it kind of make apoint to spend time with others.
(10:34):
But in the workplace, like Ithink there's different aspects
of quality time, or I think thebook said something around like
they coined it, as dialects ofquality time and I'll give you a
few, because I think it'll besomething around like they
coined it, as dialects ofquality time and I'll give you a
few because I think it'll beinteresting to kind of talk
through them and some I didn'teven really think about.
But the couple that they namedspecifically were focused
(10:54):
attention, quality conversation,a shared experience, working
with coworkers on a task orsmall group dialogue, working
with coworkers on a task orsmall group dialogue, and all of
those are importantly, you know, distinctual, because you might
want quality time but not inthe sense of like I need more
(11:14):
one-on-one time with Bruce, butit's like I actually like I
would love if we went and bowledtogether as a shared experience
and that is way more fun for meand something I would really
enjoy to bond with my coworkersand I would feel appreciated.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
So interesting because now I'm starting to, I
already agree with anonymousdonors feedback.
But now I'm like, well, yes,absolutely, that test was
botched, because I love doingone on one or or small group
projects, either virtually or inperson, where, like, we're
going to get together and we'regoing to, you know, all of our
(11:49):
brains are going to work on aproject at the same time in a
room, all things firing, like.
I did that yesterday with myteammates and we accomplished
some great stuff and I felt goodafterwards, I'm sure.
Well, I hope they felt good too, hope they appreciated the
quality time.
But, like, that to me is greatand I I do like doing that sort
of thing.
But going bowling with mycoworkers makes me want to look
(12:14):
for a way to injure myself so Inever have to do it again.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Yeah, yeah, you could .
I think that's a really goodpoint.
It's like, when you look at it,it's interesting because it's
almost like a shared thingyou're doing, it's a shared
experience, or like working on adirect task, but you basically
are delineating.
I want to keep it work related,not get it outside of work.
And like that is an importantdistinction, because some people
(12:38):
just like to go grab a beer,blow off steam, but I think what
you're saying is like.
I agree with that, even thoughquality time wasn't ranked high
on the test that we took, whichnow we know is botched, so we
won't reference it too muchanymore.
But I do love exactly whatyou're saying, like my one on
ones that I spend likeworkshopping something with
someone I feel like are some ofmy favorites because, like we
(13:00):
just get to brainstorm togetherand I don't do that a lot with
smart people Every single day.
It's like I normally justattending meetings, project
updates, making decisions,whatever, but actually like
doing a workshop with somebodyand putting our brains together
is one of the coolest things.
I think that is a generalincorporate.
It's just a ton of fun that's.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
That's.
My favorite kind of work isworking session work, like you
get one or you get two or threelike good brains in a room and
you solve a problem and you walk.
It's so funny because usuallywhen those things happen, you
walk out having accomplishedsomething which you might not
have been able to do in thatsame amount of time on your own.
I almost guarantee you wouldn'tbe able to do it.
(13:40):
And like the result is alwaysbetter because it's more brains
in the problem, but you're notsegmenting it over email or a
chat or like it's it's real time, like that's.
That's the good stuff for me.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
Yeah, yeah, that's the type of activity I always
talked about, like managing yourenergy, not necessarily your
time, and it's like I know I gettired in the afternoon and
having a session like that inthe afternoon, I'm like I'm so
energized because I'm like thatwas incredibly fun.
It was high energy, we wereproductive in what we were
trying to do and I feel, like,to your point, like we came out
with a better result than Icould have done on my own,
either because we got further orbecause, like the power of our
(14:14):
brains together, the product wasactually more refined that we
ended with, which is one of thecoolest things to do.
So I'm right there with you.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yeah, that's my favorite kind of quality time.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Yeah, yeah, I agree, and it's interesting too because
and I think about this becauseI have a relatively large team,
I think I have like 16, 17people now, and so the fact that
you don't know is scary, justby the way.
Yeah, we're actively hiring oneperson, so I can't remember did
we officially send an offer ornot?
Hopefully they accept.
Um, but I was thinking aboutlike sometimes I view employees
(14:47):
of mine as like needy if they'relike, hey, can we like just jam
on this for a while, becauseI'm like, yeah, you can do it on
your own and I don't have thetime to like jam with 17 people
every single day on somethinglike you got to find other
people to do that with.
And then I, when I think aboutit more, it's like it's probably
because their appreciationlanguage is like getting that
time to work together onsomething like they would feel
(15:08):
appreciated if I did that.
Because I'm not taking the timeto do it, they're probably
feeling less appreciated, whichis really interesting to think
about.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
That was.
That was my next question isyou know, I clearly like quality
time or jam sessions as like a,as a sub qualification of
quality time.
Like quality time or jamsessions as like a as a sub
qualification of quality time,but like what, if I like this,
but the person I don't know orthat I'm working with, I don't
know if they like this or notLike.
What's the strategy there?
How do you, how do you ensurethat my appreciation isn't
(15:37):
clashing with their appreciation?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
no-transcript.
Okay, I feel like they'reinterested in this.
Or if they're just hold up ontheir own every day, it's like
they probably wouldn't likesomething like this.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Do you think it's inappropriate, like if we ever
find a good test, to run it withour teams?
Speaker 2 (16:20):
That's the hard part, I think and the book even talks
about that Is it like?
It feels almost like it's atask or a chore to like force
people to do it?
But you know this, you'veattended leadership trainings.
It's like they always get youto do like the Myers-Briggs or
the strength assessments, orlike you're always forced to do
those or whatever.
True colors is another one, andthen you bring it to like the
(16:43):
session and you put it on alittle plaque in front of you so
everyone knows if you're red,blue, green, whatever it's like
they kind of do that yeah, I'vebeen in a few of those and I'm
like I still don't reallyunderstand the color thing.
But it helps you like engagewith people, so like I get that
and it might be interesting insome settings where it's totally
appropriate.
Um, but sometimes asking isawkward, like me going up to you
(17:04):
and be like, hey, do you reallyfeel appreciated when we jam
together?
Like it's just an awkwardquestion.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
That's why I'm wondering, like, if I approach
it from a, like assuming we canfind a good survey, or like a
good test, like if I said, hey,I took this and I learned
something about myself and Iwill just straight up tell you,
you know, for me it's uh, wordsof, or it's um acts of service,
dang it, acts of service, thankyou, it's acts of service and
(17:32):
words of affirmation for me.
Uh, so you guys know, like whatI like, I would love if you
took the test so I know what youlike.
That way I don't find myselfdoing the wrong thing for you.
Like, you know, if I approachit from a this way, I never put
you through something you don'twant to go through.
Like, is that the approach?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's interesting.
It's like do you do thatupfront and you just ask your
team to do it, so you're allkind of on the same page, and
then some people will be like,ah, this is some you know,
stupid woo, woo, new age typestuff, why do I need to do this?
But some people might getreally engaged and be like you
know what?
I think this would be awesome.
(18:11):
And you try to figure out.
And when people ask, hey,you're really great at
connecting with people andworking with others, how do you
do it?
Then you can kind of naturallybring the topic up.
But I don't know.
I'm kind of with you.
I'd rather just ask my wholeteam it's not that big, you're
like guys.
It will take like five minutes.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
Take the test.
If you don't feel comfortabledoing it, don't do it, but like,
yeah, this is, this is for meto help you when it comes to how
we recognize and appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
Yeah yeah, I agree.
Yeah, another couple ofstrategies they gave and we 'll
dive into it more towards theend but is like, obviously,
observing is one.
If someone's always asking like, hey, how did?
How was the report that I gaveyou?
Like they're probably lookingfor words of affirmation to be
like, yeah, you did great, thatwas so awesome.
Like they're fishing for thatcompliment a little bit.
And the other thing is also tolisten to their complaints.
(19:00):
I guess someone's kind oftalking and be like man, this
person just really won't maketime to like meet with me and
talk about this.
They're probably quality time.
You know they want to meet withothers and they appreciate when
other people take the time tomeet with them.
So it gave you some really likeinteresting ways to handle it.
And I think the last one, whichI thought was interesting too,
was ask how they're encouraged.
Be like, hey, when you'refeeling discouraged or you're
(19:20):
feeling like you can't dosomething, what really excites
you or encourages you to kind ofpick things back up and get
started again, and that might bean interesting way to ask it
where it doesn't feel so awkward.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Yeah, I liked all those avenues because I was like
that's interesting.
But to your point, like with abig team, it's hard to observe
and like figure out exactly.
Like figuring out which of thefive are you and I'm going to
put post-its on a wall and kindof map where Bruce sits, like
based on your day-to-dayinteractions, it just sounds too
complicated.
Just saying hey, take afive-minute test, sounds way
easier I'm.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I'm far too stupid slash lazy to be able to do that
for my team.
Yeah, so I know I gotta, Igotta, use the test I feel, like
I'm literally thinking about myteam and I'm like I think I
could.
I think I could tell youexactly what each of them liked.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
So yeah, maybe I'm half as stupid as I thought I
was I feel like both of ouroffices, like we're gonna look
like charlie from always sunnyand the mean like where he's got
all the red lines goingeverywhere.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
But it's not Pepe Sylvia, it's the appreciation
language.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Yes, it's each of your team members and their
appreciation language.
So, going back to quality time,yeah, I was trying to think
about like focused attention,like some people just want like
focused time to work with you onthings and I can tell you, like
my direct reports, there's somethat I can tackle everything I
need in like two weeks with themin like a 30 minute session,
(20:48):
and then there's some where itjust they, they want to talk
about everything.
It's like I need a couple ofhours with you every week to
like work through things.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
And for me cause.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I don't think this is my top one, like it's hard for
me Cause I'm like I canprioritize my time doing
something else, but of course Iwant to be empathetic, I want to
listen to them, I want to bethere for them, so like I make
the time.
But it's really interestingbecause this helped me figure
out.
It's like this person justwants focused attention with me
to work through things, andthat's how they're going to feel
appreciated, and when I getmore distant, they probably feel
(21:18):
less appreciated.
Speaker 1 (21:22):
So what are the breakdowns?
For quality time?
It's focused attention.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Focused attention, quality conversation, which I
take as could be just more thansurface level of like man.
Yeah, the weather man so crappytoday, but it's like actually
like in depth.
Yeah, I heard your dog wasgoing to college, like when's it
supposed to graduate, kind ofthing, exactly.
Yeah, like what color down areyou giving him, what kind of
treats?
Yeah, I think they wouldappreciate that he's getting the
(21:47):
good boy.
Uh, scholarship yeah thescholarship full ride, full ride
, good boy.
Scholarship.
Uh, shared experience.
So this is like something thatyou'd go and do together like,
okay, full ride, good boy.
Scholarship.
Shared experience so this islike something that you'd go and
do together, like bowling, graba beer, like shared, something
that you're doing together,working with coworkers on a task
(22:09):
, and then small group dialogue.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
How is working with coworkers on tasks?
Not I, uh, I guess qualityconversation are you thinking
like shared experience yeah,well, yeah, but I mean, shared
experience that's, that's likebowling, right, like so I guess.
Yeah, working with co-workersand tasks, the shared experience
work addition and what was thelast one right um, that is small
group dialogue so we get agroup together but you're not
(22:35):
necessarily working on something.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
You're just like water cooler, chatting people
okay, let's get together as ateam it's my team every week.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
Yeah, that's what we literally do that every week
yeah, yeah, yeah, it's funny.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I used to have a a weekly or bi-weekly team meeting
and I got feedback from my team.
They're just like hey, yeah,this feels like it was mainly my
more senior managers.
They're like feels like it'stoo productive, like we're kind
of just getting around andchatting, like do you think we
can make this monthly?
Speaker 1 (23:00):
I'm like yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
This is for you guys, so I don't care how frequent it
is.
And then they all got feedbackfrom their teams that they
wanted to have the 30 minutebi-weekly meeting because they
appreciated getting to just chat, that's funny, that's funny
funny yeah, I, I know my teamloves our weekly team meeting
because it's where all the teacomes out.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
So it's like, oh, I gotta, I gotta know, I gotta
know what's up.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
So like that, you want to know what's up you gotta
go to that meeting, yeah andthat helps you connect them like
human level too, because whatyou said is like you're taking
it out of work and you're kindof relating to them on a human
level, because you're likeeveryone's feeling this and this
is our opportunity to talk ittogether yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Uh, it's vegas rules in my team meeting, so yeah yeah
, I like that.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, um, and then, like, the next aspect of this
was to each one of these things,you know, there's a who, when,
where, how, and we're kind oftalking about that right now.
It's like for like quality timeor focused attention.
It's like focused attention,quality conversation Is it us
getting together and liketalking about non-work stuff?
Is it just spending time so youcan talk about your work and
(24:07):
things ongoing, like who needsto be involved?
Where is this Like?
Is this just one-on-one in anoffice or something?
Or in a conference room?
Where?
So?
Is it in the workplace?
Is it out of the workplace?
And then, how do you actuallygo about it?
So, like what is happeningthroughout that conversation,
and like each of these thingskind of has different, each one
of those of people where whatthey might appreciate and what
(24:30):
they might not appreciate asmuch, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
This is really weird because, compared to last week's
words of affirmation, words ofaffirmation was very structured,
right, like it was.
It was very much a.
You have to acknowledge thework the person did and you have
to give them like almost alittle exposition on why you're
giving the affirmation.
It can't just be clark thanksfor doing this, like it's got to
(24:55):
be.
You did this because, or likeyou did this and we needed it.
And here's the outcome and noone else could do this.
Thank god for you.
You've been putting this getthis earth specifically for this
task.
If not for you, then who?
Uh, like it was, it was veryformulaic and like this is not
that at all.
This is very variable, right,like.
(25:16):
Is it work related or is it notwork related?
Is it in the office, is it outof the office?
Is it one-on-one or is it group?
Like this almost feels likesome.
Like it is the Pepe Silviaboard.
Like I need to figure out, likespecifically, all these
different variables before I doany kind of quality time with
someone, or else they mightthink I'm a total jerk.
(25:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
Yeah, this one for me .
I was struggling too, becauseI'm just like man that's so many
to your point, like so manyvariables, how can you possibly
accommodate all those?
And like you can't, frankly,like you really can't try and
experiment with everyone to belike, okay, did they like this,
did they not like this?
To your point, will become thePepe Silvia board.
So you definitely can't do thatand that's why I think you've
got to come up with a better wayto discover this one and figure
(26:00):
out what they truly like.
Two tests yeah, maybe Osamawill give you two tests.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
If you get quality time on test one, then you're
taking a second test and I'msorry, but that's the rules.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
We'll do it together.
It'll be quality time for us todo together this test.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Yeah, both, both parties have to do it in this
case, because if they do it andthey're like, yeah, I like pizza
in a group in the office, butI'm like, and I hate pizza in
the office with one on oneperson, like it's, like yo,
we're not a fit, like this isn'tgoing to work.
We got to switch it up and dolike words of affirmation or
something, because like, nah,this ain't it.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Yeah, this one, I was almost thinking is it just
because we're humans and we'repeople?
Yes, that's why this one's sohard, because, like, I love
being in a small group chattingabout some just random crap in
our lives and the last TV showthat happened and all that, but
I hate when Bruce is there.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
You, know what I mean .
Speaker 2 (27:03):
That's a very human thing to be like.
It's going to ruin the wholevibe and it ruined my whole vibe
and I no longer want toappreciate.
I don't feel appreciated withthe small group conversations if
Bruce is there, because youknow that's how people think
about it.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
This is a throwback.
We're going to go back in time10 plus years.
You already know where this isgoing.
We used to do a lean coffee inour office and it was a really
fun thing.
That was only semi-work related,but lean coffee is basically an
agenda agenda list meetingwhere you show up, you put
(27:39):
stickies on the table and thenyou kind of do like a almost
like a scrum con bond forconversation and it was really
fun.
Like we talk about game ofThrones, cause that was popular
at the time.
We talk about like movies,games, programming, talk about
work, occasionally, likewhatever made it onto the thing
we voted, and then we decidedthat's the next thing we're
going to talk about.
Right, like some people wouldcome in the break when we were
(28:00):
doing this and like you'd almostthey'd do that.
Like oh, the peasants aretalking again.
Yes, hmm, I wouldn't be joiningthem for a skinny latte or
whatever they call it.
Like you could just tell thatwas the vibe.
And now, thinking backretrospectively, it it's like
well, no, they don't appreciatequality time.
Yeah, that's.
Yeah, they're seeing that as anabsolute waste and we're a
(28:22):
bunch of idiots.
But like, yeah, truly, you knowit's, it's just funny.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
I mean that session, to your like, of us not thinking
about quality time being ourtop.
Like you brought up jammingwith someone on something that
is quality time and youappreciate it.
The lean coffee was like smallgroup dialogue that wasn't
necessarily about work the mostof the time and, like to your
point, that is a quality timeattribute.
And exactly to your point, Iremember people coming in and be
(28:47):
like that's a waste of time.
I've got work to do and it'slike well no, for me.
It motivated me to work harderbecause I appreciated and wanted
to help the people around meand it also made me more
informed about things that mayor may not be work-related, but
helped me connect with someoneon a personal level and that
made me more effective in theworkplace, and so I got a ton of
value out of those.
(29:07):
I look back and like those weresome of the most fun meetings I
think we had in that time ofour work careers.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
And I'm starting to realize in this whole effort you
know, came in a skeptic, cameout a believer the thing is,
with words of affirmation andquality time, if you are able to
identify and do thisappropriately and correctly, you
can absolutely improve themorale of the person at the
other side of the conversation.
So, like you know, what somepeople thought was stupid, like
(29:35):
lean coffee, probably kept ushappy and motivated and working
and we didn't even realize thatwe were just like this is just a
fun thing, but it's like no, welooked forward to every
Wednesday morning at ninebecause, like that was, that was
the time for that and our workprobably benefited from it
because that's our appreciationlanguage.
Yeah, 100 percent, and like youcan absolutely use this to game
(29:56):
people, you know?
Speaker 2 (29:57):
Yeah, a hundred percent and like you can
absolutely use this to gamepeople, you know, yeah, yeah,
that's like something that thebook goes into later is like
don't think this is some evilcorporate thing about like
retaining people.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But it kind of is.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
It could be, though they even acknowledge it.
They're like, yeah, you couldtotally see it as that, but it's
really not supposed to be that.
It's just about being andworking together at a human
level.
Yeah, so it's interesting toyour point though, cause, like
when you think about thosethings, you're like I did
probably stay longer at thatcompany than I probably needed
to, because that's what that wasfun, and I enjoyed it and I
(30:27):
felt encouraged and like that'swhat gave me energy to keep
doing the work I was doing everysingle day.
And so when you think about itin like hindsight, you're just
like holy cow, like that made abig difference to my happiness
at work.
Well, it's.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
It's kind of sad because, yes, you could use this
nefariously, but like let's.
Let's just think through this.
Like, logically, right Companydecides we're all in on
appreciation and we're going towe're going to use this book,
we're going to use this test,we're going to identify and
we're going to optimize forappreciation with our employees,
(31:00):
train people on it, make ithappen, because this is going to
produce better work.
What's the negative of this?
Right?
Like they get better, they getbetter outcomes.
The individual contributors,like you and me, were like I
love working here.
This place appreciates me.
I want to work harder.
Like it really is.
Even in the most nefarious case, if you are delivering on what
(31:23):
the employee wants, it's goingto create a net positive for
both parties.
Like I see no way this couldactually be used for true evil.
It's almost like lawful evil,but it's still good for everyone
.
So I don't know I'm becoming abeliever of this whole thing
until we get to touching andthen I'm out of here.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Yeah, and then touching.
We got to tread lightly becauseit gets real dangerous.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
We need.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
HR.
Hr enters the chat for thatconversation.
But yeah, I agree with you,it's hard to see how this could
go poorly, and I think the wayit goes poorly is because of
people trying to be greedy, getahead in their career.
They're going to figure outways to do this or ways to game
the system to say, well, I needto feel appreciated by getting
(32:10):
promoted.
And this person didn't make mefeel appreciated because Bruce
assumed that my language wassomething else and then it
wasn't, and he shouldn't getpromoted.
I should get promoted.
Like you know, that's going tohappen, or?
Speaker 1 (32:21):
they're like well, we're meeting your appreciation
language.
You don't need a pay raise thisyear.
Like you can see the cracks.
But I feel like if it's at thatlevel, you should have been
gone a year ago.
Like you should have been gonea year ago.
Like you should have seen that,that flashing train lights in
the distance and gotten out waysooner.
(32:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
Yeah, yeah.
I think this is one of thosethings that the reason
corporations don't do it isbecause it's hard, it is hard,
it's not easy.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
It requires care and attention and evaluation, which
are three words thatcorporations absolutely despise.
So, yeah, it's not going tohappen.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Yeah, it's so funny too, because at the end of the
day, it's going to help yourbottom line.
If you do this, you're going toattain and attract great people
.
Everyone's going to be happy.
Therefore, working harder andspending more time like this
will help in the longterm.
And so it's so sad to say whatwe're saying, but it is one of
those things that it's likewhat's what's easy for a
corporation.
Throw out a reward program thatif you get so many points, you
(33:25):
get a $10 gift card to best buy,like that's easy, that's the
easy cop out way to do it.
The right way to do it issomething like this Well, this,
well, I'm here.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
I'm very curious about the gifts episode.
Like I really want to know thedeets on that.
No spoilers, but like nospoilers, that's that probably
more than touching for me.
I I'm just give me the deets ongifts because I I associate
gifts with I'm giving you a gift, so I don't have to give you a
raise.
I'm giving you a gift becauseyou did crunch over the weekend,
or something like here's yourpizza, thanks, thanks for you
(33:58):
know, bleeding sweat throughyour veins, uh like it is, I'm
interested.
Yeah, I, I'm interested.
But you know, I truly believeif companies did this with the
right intent, like personallyspeaking, if I knew that a
company was going to evaluateeveryone's appreciation language
and make it an effort to dobetter, I would take a pay cut
(34:21):
to go work at that companybecause I would know that they
were invested in retention andkeeping their employees happy
and ensuring it's like a goodworkplace environment.
Like I would work for less forthat.
You know, like that's that thatincreases, hypothetically
speaking, that increases youractual longevity, right, Because
(34:41):
if you're less stressed, if youare burning yourself less
because you like your workenvironment and you feel like it
is a place where you'reappreciated, then you're not
thinking am I going to lose myjob?
Am I going to you know, like,how am I going to make you know,
next year work here?
Like I think it?
Just you get into a cycle ofpositivity and it would lead to
a much better result.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I 100% agree with you .
Yeah, yeah, I think the theactual like implementation of
this.
Imagine, if you're imagine, ifyou're interviewing to go to
this company and you're like,well, what's like the culture,
like in, like a gold starcompany would be like.
You know, something that webelieve in is that everybody has
a primary and a secondaryappreciation language to feel
(35:23):
encouraged in the workplace andlike.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Imagine hearing that when you're interviewing and
you're like I hear thatinterview and I'm like, can I
just work for great?
Can that when you'reinterviewing and they're like,
bro, I hear that in an interviewand I'm like can I just work
for free?
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Can I start today?
At that point I'm sending aresignation note to my boss and
I'm like I'm out, I got anotherjob.
But eventually I carried thatto be like, yeah, mine is acts
of service and, like my teamknows that, like this is my
primary appreciation languageand they help like me, they help
appreciate me by doing doingthat language and we have
guidelines and rules around thatof how you can do that in a way
(35:53):
that, uh, you know, fits insideof our corporate structure.
And like how cool would that beto hear.
Like that's something that'sbeen implemented all the way
down to whoever you're talkingto and they take it seriously
and that's the way they work Iwould die happy, uh, like I've
been.
Speaker 1 (36:09):
I've been work heaven .
Are you crying?
Speaker 2 (36:11):
I see a tear just it can't be real.
It can't be real you know thisgoes to your quality time, where
we started this as a tasktogether to talk about this next
appreciation language.
We jammed on it and we gotexcited.
I feel like I could run througha wall right now.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
I could literally punch through steel plates with
my fist.
No glove, just straight through, right this second, five
minutes from now.
No, because the feeling'scoming down.
But if there was a steel platethat I could punch through with
my fist bare fist, right now,I'd do it.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Honestly, I'm in danger to those around me
because I feel like One Punchman right now.
You're glowing, you're glowing.
I could hit somebody and theycould die immediately.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
I'm afraid to run my fingers through your hair for
fear they might get singed fromthe glow.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Please, no, please, no.
We need the physical touch.
We need the physical touchepisode.
Yesterday I got him well,that's, that's quality time.
Um, we have three more, whichyou already alluded to acts of
service, tangible gifts and aphysical touch and then we got
like a wrap-up episode.
So that's what's coming next,not necessarily in that order.
(37:31):
We can really go whatever orderwe want.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
So okay, all right.
Well, uh, don't tell me nospoilers, I'm very excited for
next week, uh.
So don't tease it, don't giveme a hint, because I don't want
to know.
But I do want to know, just alittle hint.
Just give me a little hint,like just a tiny, tiny little
hint, you sure?
No, I don't want to knowanymore.
I've changed my mind.
I mean, okay, I won't tell youwhat if.
(37:53):
What if my love language issurprise?
What if I like surprise?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
my love language depends on the day on.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
On tuesdays I'm all about surprise, but on thursdays
it's all spoilers.
I don't want anything but knownexpectations.
That's it.
That's it.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
Fridays physical touch all day.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
No fun day Friday baby more like fondle Friday, am
I right?
Ooh, oh gross.
Look out for suitcases.
Look out for those suitcases.
They don't.
They don't appreciate thephysical touch and neither does
(38:41):
the owner of that suitcase.
Just FYI, you creep out there.
Well, thank you, clark.
Once again, I really appreciateyou taking point on this and
making this happen.
Maybe we should hang out laterand, you know, spend some
quality time together, just as alittle reward for the work
you've done here.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
Maybe some shared activity would be fun, like
sipping acai balls through astraw.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
It's not acai, but yeah, yeah, close enough, close
enough.
What is it again?
I already forgot.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Tapioca.
That's what it is tapioca,that's what day I've had.
I can't differentiate betweenthe two.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
I want some pure diabetes water with tapioca soup
at the bottom, through a strawfour times as big, adding four
times as much plastic to theenvironment, please, and I want
to pay $11 for this drink.
So plastic to the environment,please, and I want to pay $11
for this drink.
So let's make it happentogether, shall we?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Some ungodly amount.
I'm right there with you.
I just heard a clock.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
I just heard a clock.
Yeah, it's my clock.
We talked about that before,haven't we?
We talked about my clock.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
I mean, usually your mic cuts it out, but this time
no.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
I heard it.
It's because I'm talking whilethe clock is chiming.
That's why.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
It's a good signal, though, Like hey, this is the
end of your work day.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Cut it off.
Cut it off.
No, I mean it chimes every houruntil 10 o'clock at night, and
then it stops chiming.
Nice, I like that I have alovely picture on my clock of a.
It looks like a StudioGhibli-esque animated field.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
It's gorgeous they made it field.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
It's gorgeous and there's little butterflies in
the background.
Oh, wow, you have to shoot me apicture right now.
Yeah, yeah, it's great.
I love, love it.
It's kleido.
Clock shout out, kleido.
Yeah, not sponsored.
If not sponsored, if.
If you want to join our notsponsored discord again, go to
the show notes.
We also have swag.
If you ever want to like wear acorporate strategy shirt around
, you could do that through ourspread shop.
(40:31):
You can get a link to podcastson other platforms.
You can go to our website.
There's so many things you cando.
It's all in the show notes, inthe all the links link tree.
Click that, check it out.
But, importantly, the mostimportant thing you can do is
share this podcast with yourfriends, family, loved ones and
the people you hate the most,because it doesn't matter what
side of the fence you fall on.
If you think this is the bestpodcast on the planet, friends.
(40:53):
If you hate it, enemies.
But guess what?
Your enemies are our friendsand we want them here.
So please share, please leaveus a review.
We would so appreciate that.
This is a word-of-mouthmarketing podcast, because we
are weirdos who hide ouridentities, so you have to do
the work for us.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Thank you for doing that by the way, we appreciate
you, Clark, for your constantsupport and continued
encouragement of this podcast.
Everybody in the Discord weappreciate you for always being
there for us and being soconsistent, even though
sometimes we can be inconsistent.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
So thank you, yeah that was really good, that that
followed all of the rules Goodjob.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
I'm looking back at the rules.
The rules were affirmation ofcharacter, praise for
personality traits.
We nailed it Great job.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
You did, you did.
Uh, and that wraps up yetanother episode of corporate
strategy podcast.
It could have been an email.
Make sure that you affirm yourwords and quality your time.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark andyou're on mute.
We'll see you next week.
Popular Podcasts
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com