July 14, 2025 • 43 mins
Understanding how people feel appreciated varies significantly between individuals, with five distinct appreciation languages determining what makes team members feel truly valued.
• Words of affirmation can be delivered through praise for accomplishments, character affirmations, or personality trait recognition
• Recognition delivery matters significantly – some prefer public praise while others find it mortifying
• Understanding if someone prefers one-on-one, small group, or large group recognition is crucial
• Written appreciation allows some people to save and reference positive feedback later
• Creating a "Working With Me" guide helps teams understand individual preferences and communication styles
• Generic praise becomes meaningless when overused or applied too broadly
• Workplace appreciation must be specific and personalized to remain effective
• The Discord has a poll about appreciation languages – join and share your preferences
Join our Discord to participate in the appreciation languages poll and continue the conversation! Click the link in our show notes to access the server with just one tap.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So then I said get your hands off that squeegee.
(00:05):
And they're like I'm not goingto do it.
And I'm like well then, I'mcalling the police.
So that's where that ended.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
So did the guy that was walking the alpaca ever make
it across the street?
Speaker 1 (00:21):
No, and the wild thing was there was an Arby's
Right behind him.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Wow, yeah, I just can't believe.
This all started With a sack ofmagic beans that you got from
your neighbor.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Even, even weirder than that, it was a Tuesday.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Do you think it's because you accidentally used
suntan lotion instead oftoothpaste on your toothbrush?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
That could definitely be a part of it, and the water
was coming out in reverse.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
And the water was coming out in reverse.
See, you never think of thosethings when you're traveling to
the East Coast and like yourworld is just flipped upside
down, I know.
And that's why it should havebeen an email.
Welcome back to CorporateStrategy, the podcast.
That could have been an email.
I'm Clark and he's Bert.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
He doesn't get to talk.
This is the Clark Show.
I mean technically it is so goahead.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Oh, what a time.
It's almost Independence Day.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Yeah, our listeners have already passed Independence
Day.
This is a Monday.
Yeah, they're're like, what areyou talking?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
about it's not independence day.
Yikes, you're right, and we'relike we're ahead a little bit
too.
So this is like way past.
This is, oh man, I just brokethe whole like time sequence the
continuum is just snapped forour listeners.
I'm sorry, sorry.
I'm sorry.
I did that to you.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Let's just start over .
I'll cut out the beginning,don't worry, let's start over.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Go ahead, do it again .
No, no, no.
I think you got to enter us tobe correct this time?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Welcome back to another episode of
CorporateStrategybiz, thepodcast that could have been an
email of CorporateStrategybiz,the podcast that could have been
an email.
I'm Clark.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
I'm.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Bruce.
Hey Bruce, Tell me about yourquips today.
What are you quipping?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Oh, I've got the quips aplenty.
They call me the quippinator.
I ordered a sandwich to run onmy quiptendo and it's just let
me tell you it's Quipulating itcomes with a bag of Quips.
Oh, quips and Queso.
(02:53):
Wow, I feel like we're ending.
Let's roll it back, let's do it, let's start over again.
I think we need to start over,yeah.
Third time.
It does the charm, go ahead.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Oh, okay, me again.
Howdy y'all.
Welcome back to another episodeof CorporateStrategybiz, the
podcast.
That could have been an email.
How y'all doing out there?
I'm Clark, I'm Clark, I'm Bruce.
I feel like we're in a Rick andMorty episode.
(03:27):
We're just going through everysingle dimension and we're just
coming out of somethingdifferent.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
One of these is good.
Trust me, one of these willwork.
We'll get there.
We'll get there.
One of them will be a good one,I promise One day.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
I mean, what episode is this 171?
Speaker 1 (03:42):
170.
170.
Wait, what episode is this?
171?
170.
1-7-0.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Wait, no, no, this is 171, isn't it?
No, no, because we ended it on.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Oh, you're right, it is 171.
Yeah, yep, you're right, man,you're right.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
The continuum is broken, Like we are time warping
right now.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It's scary.
Well, 169 was the end of theshow, so it's really hard to
keep counting after the showends.
That was our last episode, so Idon't really know how we do the
numbers henceforth.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
I don't know where we are.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Episode two you and me Starting over Episode two.
Yeah, but we're not starting.
This is the end.
I mean it's the end, it's over,we're in the aftermath.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
We're in the afterlife.
The post show, this is all postshow.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's what itis.
This is just the post show.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Welcome to the post show episode 169, part two.
This is 169, well, technicallyit's 169, part three.
Yep, Part of our series ofepisodes that we're doing per
Clark's insistence on lovelanguages.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Absolutely Well, not love languages because it's the
workplace, but appreciationlanguages for the workplace.
That is the mini series we areon.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
And love languages with extra steps.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Yeah yeah, love languages with extra steps, but
don yeah, love languages withextra steps, but don't kiss your
coworkers, don't touch, notouching, no, touchy, no touchy.
So in the last episode shouldwe just jump right into it?
Absolutely All right, let's doit.
Let's do it.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Maybe we should start over one more time.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Should we?
It might get weird.
I'm a little scared, to behonest.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
I don't know where the next one's going to go Maybe
just keep going, just in case.
All right, I'll keep going,okay.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
You ready?
Yeah, you're not ready.
I'm looking at you right now.
You're not ready.
I can see it in your beadylittle eyes.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
I'm not going to do anything.
Go talk about your lovelanguage.
Come on, let's hear it.
What language of love do weneed to learn?
Speaker 2 (05:47):
No, touching Appreciation languages, thank
you.
So in the last episode weintroed the topic appreciation
languages in the workplace.
How important appreciation isfor the people around you, but
sadly not everybody feelsappreciated in the same way.
People feel appreciateddifferently, and that's why this
(06:11):
book was written.
The five appreciation languagesbasically coming off the whole
entire, to your point, the lovelanguages, which is relationship
, how do you express and howdoes your partner express love?
This is very similar, but inthe workplace no love, no touch,
no love.
And this is how you feelappreciated in the workplace.
(06:31):
And so in the initial one wegave an overview of all five of
the appreciation languages.
There may be more, we'll talkabout that.
They have outlined in this book.
So words of affirmation,quality time talk about that.
That they have outlined in thisbook.
So words of affirmation,quality time, acts of service.
(06:53):
The last one is gifts.
I guess is how we say it, sotangible gifts is what they
specifically call it.
And then the last one isappropriate, I'm going to say
that out loud so everybody hearsit again Appropriate, physical
touch, very important.
No touching, no touching, justdon't.
And if you do, just don't.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
How about that?
Just don't Best advice I cangive you.
Just don't, Just don't do it.
So today in our mini-series,we're going into the and we also
have the poll live on theDiscord.
I've got to cut in.
Thank you, there's a poll.
That's live on the discordright now.
Go fill it out, because we wantto use data from your
(07:28):
participation to help informupcoming episodes.
So do that.
Please continue clark yeah,I'll be.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I'll be really curious to those poll results of
what you think your yourappreciation language is.
And then there's a quiz quizthat both Bruce and I took to
determine what is our primaryand what is our secondary
appreciation place in theworkplace.
And so we will probably publishthat quiz at some point,
because I'd be curious.
You think it's this.
Now take the quiz, let's seewhat it actually might be, and
(07:59):
maybe it's a bad quiz.
We will be the judge of thatonce we get there.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Can I ask a question before we move on?
Did what you think you werematched up with what you were?
No, okay, interesting, whatabout you?
We'll save that then.
I didn't know what this waswhen you gave me the quiz, so I
was like I don't know, I don'tknow what.
I'm doing, I'm just answering.
I'm answering questions thatare being asked of me, so
(08:23):
answering.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
I'm answering questions that are being asked
of me, so I'm just doing thebest I can.
Fair enough, all right.
So let's go into the very firstone Today we are talking about
words, words of affirmation.
That is the first language ofappreciation that we're going to
be talking about, and I thoughtit'd be good for us to talk
about just in general what thisthing is and why it matters.
And then I have kind of fivedifferent vectors, that there's
(08:44):
a whole entire book around thisthat I'm reading that gives
different perspectives on whatthis is and what the different
types of words of affirmationare and how people appreciate
them, because, as you think,like words of affirmation, like
what, for you, comes to mind inthe workplace.
Thank you, thank you, yes.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
You did great Good job.
Okay, wow, I liked it.
You really turned in thatreport.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Yowza, you sent an email, that's really all I can
think of yeah, that's all I got,fair enough.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
I've never heard anything other than those four
specific examples.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Do you get applause every time that you send an
email?
Now I'm really concerned aboutyour day to day.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
There's actual clapping happens behind me, but
when I turn around it's gone.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
So wow, and this this time warp is really throwing
things off, but I think I seewho's doing that in your
background right now.
See who's doing that in yourbackground right now.
Oh good, because I can't, maybeI can help you out.
So the book gives a couple ofthings that really fit into the
(09:55):
words of affirmation.
The first one is praise foraccomplishments.
It's similar to what you'resaying it's like okay, you
accomplished something, youcompleted a big project you did
really well, kind of pulling theteam forward and getting the
right collaboration, and weshould give you praise for that
because it's a job well done,which is, I think, what you were
alluding to and I think isprobably the most common words
of affirmation.
It's just praise foraccomplishments.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
So, and I'm ignorant to all of this, this is very
much like a Clark-led thing.
So I have questions and I'msorry for our listeners if I
seem exceptionally stupid inthis regard.
But praise for accomplishments,Like, we're literally just
saying like as far asappreciation language goes, this
(10:42):
is its own category, separateand apart from the others.
So when I say like hey, Craig,great job recording that podcast
, that's me asserting anappreciation language to Craig
and this actually motivatesCraig, according to the book.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yes, If Craig is motivated by this.
Yes, if this is a love orappreciate.
I know you got it stuck in myhead, you dirty dog.
If this is my appreciationlanguage, this could be one of
the vectors.
But everybody, even if yourwords of affirmation praise
might not actually be that thingthat you care about, but for
some people there are otherthings, that kind of categories.
(11:22):
Yes, subcategories, if you willso, yes, praise this one's
really basic.
I think everyone understands it.
The book.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
not everyone's affected by it.
Right Like and that's whatwe're saying here is there are
different personality types thatare impacted in different ways.
Praise and affirmation.
You might think that Craiglikes me telling him he did a
good job recording the podcast,but Craig doesn't actually care,
like that's literally water off, correct back Cause he's a
(11:50):
beaver and beavers don't havethe ability to retain water yeah
.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Yeah, exactly yeah, that oil, definitely yeah, as
natural as skin keeps the water,just yeah, we got it.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I'm just keeping a level.
I'm making sure I understandthis as you go through, so
continue.
Yeah, you got it.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
So, yes, so some people like are all about the
praise, like, anytime you doanything, give them claps,
whatever, like in general, thatis what a lot of people think of
is when they think of words ofaffirmation.
But, to your point, some peoplelike Craig, even though that
might be happening, some peoplejust might not appreciate that.
(12:31):
Okay, whatever, like good job,that doesn't mean anything to me
.
So the study basically saysthat, just in general, keeping
praise top of your mind whenthings happen and praising
others is a good thing to do.
People will be more motivatedand you can kind of blanket
everybody pretty muchappreciates everybody getting
accomplishments and praise forthose accomplishments when they
happen.
However, there are ways tomaximize this, to make it even
more effective for the personthat you are giving praise to,
and that goes into two differentcategories.
(12:53):
Some people appreciate when youtalk about their character, you
give them an affirmation ofcharacter.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Like hey.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Bruce, your integrity and reporting that potentially
security vulnerability thatpeople have been exploiting was
really great and it helped usprotect our company from bad
actors.
Thank you for being such agreat part of our team.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
I feel great I don't know why.
Feel motivated.
I feel really motivated to justdo more work.
I love it.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
I feel really motivated to just do more work.
I love it, but basically somepeople look for that as like
take it beyond just the greatjob to tell them about something
that's deep and core to themand basically add that in to the
praise.
So honesty, integrity,compassion, things like that
basically affirms theircharacter and goes deeper than
just one level, and so callingthose things out and even
(13:43):
thinking about those thingsallows you to be more effective
to people who may be feeling ormay need this appreciation
language in the workplace.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
So, level one, tier one, thank you, you did a great
job, hey.
Team good work today.
Team good work today.
Tier two hey Clark, I reallyappreciated the way that you
handled that delicate situationwith the foreigners.
They get a little uppity, youknow, because they're not from
(14:15):
the United States, and youreally brought that foreign
class to them.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
You feel motivated.
I think you got to go one leveldeeper, like saying, hey, I
really appreciated how, wheneveryone was down in the dumps
about missing the projectdeadline, you were there for
them.
You showed empathy and you wereable to rally the team around
and encourage them that theycould continue on.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So it's almost like you're singling out while making
everyone else look bad.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Well, this, this could be not in front of
everybody, it could beindividual, yeah yeah, this is
definitely a private thing toconsider yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
So you can take that private and affirm the character
.
When Bruce really fumbled thatpodcast example earlier, you
kind of held the whole thingtogether.
People were going tounsubscribe and if it wasn't for
your correction, God knows whathappened.
Thanks for that.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Yep, it's going one level deeper.
It's not just saying hey,thanks for saving the podcast,
you're going one level deeper.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Yeah, reaching down to the bus yeah, exactly, you
really gotta like slide overthem, but you gotta call out a
new character trait along theway.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
So I think you're getting there.
We'll see at the end of this ifyou figure this out, I'm
learning.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
yeah, all right, I going to use these on my team.
No touching, though, yeah notouching.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Please don't use that on your team.
They would not appreciate that.
A next level to that, whichalso can make this more
effective, is the praise forpersonality.
So we kind of mentioned itbefore.
I think there's differencesbetween things that are
character-based honesty,integrity, compassion versus
things that arepersonality-based.
Hey, you are always soorganized when you do your work
(15:47):
and I always feel disorganizedwhen I'm doing mine, but you
really help me understand what'sgoing on in your space and it's
really easy for me tounderstand.
So thank you for being soorganized within your work,
because I think it makes ourwhole organization better.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
So calling out the specific personality trait.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
No, you can't do that .
Don't do that.
Hr is not liking that.
It's not a physicalcharacteristic, oh okay, it's a
personality characteristic.
You're getting there, try again.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Okay, try again.
Come on, all right.
I really like the way you takethe time to explain things to
people, even though they'reabsolutely incapable of learning
.
You have this energy that youexude and a willingness to put
up with really frustratingsituations and persevering
(16:34):
through.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
That was great, very good.
I feel so motivated.
I feel like I'm ready to runthrough a wall.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
Oh, wow, I'm learning .
Okay, all right, so we got tierone, tier two, tier three.
Does it go?
Speaker 2 (16:49):
deeper.
So now it kind of goes intothat's how you can be effective
in giving praise.
However, now it comes down tothe how and where.
To your point earlier.
Like not everybody wants to begiven these words of affirmation
in front of everybody, likesome people just don't want that
they're like, I don't like tobe called out in front of crowds
(17:09):
.
Maybe I'm a little more?
This is what I was wondering,this one is really important
because, even though you think,as a good boss like I, always
give praise, I call them up tothe stage and from everybody, I
rally them on Little did youknow?
Some people hate that.
That is.
Their worst fear is gettingpublicly acknowledged, even
though they want to beacknowledged for their work.
They want to be told they'redoing a good job.
They don't want it to be infront of everybody.
(17:30):
Hmm, I actually this one'sinteresting.
I have a person on my team.
We give out like a you know MVPaward, if you will, and we have
our own buzz on it or whateverevery year to like one person as
part of our large organization.
And they got it.
And their worst fear came true.
They were brought up on stagein front of everybody and
afterwards they told me I didn'tknow this.
(17:52):
They were like hey, just so youknow.
That was an absolute nightmarefor me.
I was sweating through myclothes.
I hated every second of havingto go up there.
Wow, please, if you can do notlet that happen again.
And I had no idea and I'm like.
I felt so bad because I'm likewhy wouldn't you want to Like?
Because I'm OK with that,that's OK for me from like a
words of affirmation perspective.
(18:13):
I'm fine being in front ofpeople I didn't even think about
.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
How do they want to be recognized and interesting
and for me I'm I'm alwaysreluctant to praise my team in a
public space, so like we evenhave a shout outs channel on our
Slack and if my coworkerslistening they're probably
laughing when I said that outloud because it's kind of it's
(18:39):
kind of turned into like a backpadding ceremonial place where
it's like congratulations forchecking your email, you did
your job today.
Hey, love you.
So I don't give my team anykind of public shout out, but I
always try to make sure that Irecognize and give words of
specifically affirmation andpraise and call out specifically
what they did.
(18:59):
Well, privately, because I feellike you can't ever muck that
up right.
Like I don't know if the bookhas anything right, like yeah, I
don't know if the book hasanything to say about this, but
like I don't think anyonespecifically doesn't like their
manager saying hey, you didreally good, thanks for doing
that.
You know, like privately,publicly, I can see that being a
problem, so I just don't do it.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , and there's there's one more
vector to that.
But I want to finish thisconversation because I actually
think there is a case where whatyou just said is not good.
But I'm going to bring thatcontroversial thing up.
Sure, let's go together.
(19:45):
Or if I'm working with someone,that's great.
Some people like it in front ofothers and maybe it's not
others, as in large groups itcould be like just their team,
people they know, people they'recomfortable with, they're like
yeah, this is like I would loveto be recognized in front of the
peers that I work with everyday, that I trust and I know do
good work.
I don't care about everybodyelse, I just want to be
recognized in front of them sothey know that I'm doing good
work as well, and then I'mgetting this praise in front of
(20:05):
them.
It would make me feel proud.
So some people like small groupkind of words of affirmation
outside of one-on-ones and notin the larger setting which I
never really thought of.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
That too, I can see that I didn't know there'd be a
difference, but I guess it makessense yeah, I, I do do that, I
do give shout outs and like theteam calls, but never in the big
calls, I leave that to the bigwigs.
Yeah for sure.
And I think it means more right.
Like if you get, if you get theaffirmation from like CEO, cmo,
(20:35):
and they're like yeah, you rockCraig, then it's like well, I
mean, Bruce always told me Irocked and I quit believing him
after a while.
But like when CEO says it, wow,that really makes my heart
sparkle.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
It was meaningful, right Because?
You have less interaction.
So when it happens it's kind ofrare.
It's not like this continualthing.
Okay, whatever Bruce thinks I'mcool, we talk every day.
Ceo that never talked to mylife has recognized me for work
that they know I did.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
That's a big deal, but I's it is important to
understand if that person wantsit publicly or privately.
Yeah, uh, I I, I can see that Ican even see that for me a
little bit.
I definitely like the moreprivate praise than public.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Yeah, yeah it's so difficult, like as I was
thinking about this, because,like, as you're giving out a big
award, it's usually a surprisefor the person getting it.
You know what I mean.
Like most of the time it's likeit's supposed to be now.
The winner of our MVP of thequarter award for the best sales
numbers come up on stage andthen they announced the name
(21:37):
Like they don't really knowahead of time.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
So like that was a tough one, cause, like how do
you get ahead of that to be likeyeah, especially if you put
like your employees in for it,you know it's like oh yeah, I
put craig in for this, like Ithink, I think craig can win it
yeah, oh, craig hates absolutelyyeah like this is their literal
worst nightmare to have to goon stage.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
This one's tough because it's like big things
like that it's sometimes hard toavoid because you don't want to
like bring them into one-on-one, be like hey, bruce, I know you
don't want to go up on stage.
You're in for a big award ifyou do win.
Would you be okay with themcalling you out on stage, or
would you rather not let thathappen?
It just feels awkward I don'tknow.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
I feel like we've kind of missed the mark on
behavior in general with peoplebecause we're so focused on like
, hey, what?
What's your t-shirt size and doyou like chocolate or vanilla
ice cream on your cake?
But like it really should be,hey, is it okay if I like give
you a shout out to the wholecompany on our slack like, would
(22:42):
you like that, versus like mejust telling you you did a great
job?
Like I feel like we should behaving those kind of
conversations to reallyunderstand what the person likes
and what that would motivatethem and make them feel good.
And even I feel like evenhaving that conversation I don't
know what the book says aboutthis, but like asking people
about their specific preferencein words for affirmation like
(23:05):
that in itself shows a care andattention and a respect for the
employee that I feel like youdon't really ever get right.
It's like, oh, they actuallycare about what I want, not just
doing something because theydon't want me to quit my job.
Like that that seems reallynice.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Yeah, yeah, it makes it more human because it's like
it's less about the corporatismof it and it's more about how do
you want to feel appreciated,which that's what I really like
about this.
Like to your point, I thinkthere's strategies of you can
probably figure out what someoneis without letting them feel
awkward about it or making themfeel awkward as you're talking
through it, feel awkward asyou're talking through it, but,
(23:46):
like in that situation.
It's just.
It is tough because, likeusually, those things happen in
a public setting, in front ofeverybody.
And we're just assuming thateverybody is okay with that and
that literally might be theirworst nightmare to have that
happen and they might leave.
And you're like why would theyleave?
Like I just gave them the bestaward that everybody gets all
year.
Like what happened?
And they basically come backand say, hey, you didn't ask me
my preferences about how I feltand wanted to be recognized and
(24:09):
I just don't feel comfortablelike having that happen to me
again.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
And it's.
You know, I'm not.
This might sound like ageneralization, but in tech
specifically, there's a lot ofvery different types of
personalities and preferenceswhen it comes to communication
and recognition and publicspeaking it's.
I think it's crucial if you arein a space where folks are not
(24:35):
all the same a type personality,you get to the bottom of, like
what do they want, what do theylike, before you put them in for
something.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Absolutely, and it's you know, something that you and
I may have talked about I don'tknow that we've talked about it
on this podcast, but issomething I I've seen that has
controversial reviews is, in aworkplace, having a working with
Bruce guide that every newemployee basically has to fill
out, and so they fill out forthemselves.
This is how I operate best.
(25:03):
This is how working with mewill go well, interesting, yeah,
and so like, fill out forthemselves.
This is how I operate best.
This is how working with mewill go well, interesting, yeah,
and so like they define, hey,working with me.
Just so you know I'm a morningperson.
I love to have my focus time inthe morning to accomplish my
tasks, and when you're readingmy working with Clark book, you
would learn all this about me tobe like, okay, I'll avoid
scheduling meetings in themorning because that's when they
like to do all their work, andI'll save it for the afternoon.
(25:25):
Or, hey, during lunch, like Ilike to just put my headphones
on and kind of stay to myself.
But I also love playing pingpong.
Like I would love to play pingpong in the afternoons with, you
know, some of some of thecoworkers, if I can and so, like
I've seen mixed reviews on, isthat pretentious, like if you
need a guide just to be a humanand work with people.
(25:46):
Like is that pretentious or isthat actually a good thing,
because everybody's just sodifferent?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
See, I know what I'm about to say will probably make
some people go hippy, dippy, woo, woo, like oh, there goes the
participation trophy group again.
But I truly think that's agreat idea and it's not because
(26:12):
I want it for myself, butbecause I deeply care about the
well-being and happiness ofeveryone I work with.
Like work sucks, it reallysucks.
And I think if everyone filledout that little book or if they
had a little bio about them intheir Slack profile or whatever
and it's the first time you'reworking with someone, maybe it's
(26:33):
the first time you're going toa meeting, you check that and
you're like oh, they actuallysaid they don't like high energy
.
So I'm not going to come intothis being bombastic and trying
to make the sale.
Instead, I'm going to focus on,like having a meaningful
conversation, listening to whatthey have to say.
Like I feel like that canreally set you up for good
relationship, success withpeople, good first impressions.
(26:54):
You know, knowing how to workwith people like that could be
huge.
But I think there's a.
Unfortunately there is a groupof people out there and it's a
pretty big group that sees anykind of new age recognition of
mental health and, you know,psychology and personal
(27:16):
well-being as weakness andthey're like, oh, we didn't have
this and we did the copier workin the 1980s, we don't need it
today.
And it's like, well, yeah, youdidn't know about it back then,
but, like we understand now, youknow.
Like this is a.
This is a much better way forus to work.
I mean, we saw thistransitioning to agile literally
just you and me moving intolike agile based methodology,
(27:40):
which was a much better way forus to work.
There are people who are soresistant to it, but it made our
lives better.
It made everyone's life better.
So I think this is a great idea.
I love it personally.
Yeah, I'd love to do it.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Like, what you're saying is like every nobody's
you can never make a decisionthat everyone's gonna be happy
with.
Someone will always have aproblem, no matter what you do
and everything can turn yeah,exactly Like everything can turn
to a slippery slope, but set upthe guide rails, say here's the
things we put into it.
We don't put things like, likeit's okay.
If you say, hey, I have apeanut allergy, so if you could
(28:14):
not eat peanuts around me so Idon't die, like that'd be great,
like that's totally fine.
But if you're starting to addin all these optional
preferences to be like, hey, ontuesdays I really don't like the
smell of fish, then I thinkit's getting pretentious.
Where it's like okay, nownobody can eat fish in the
office on tuesdays because larrydoesn't like fish on tuesdays
and like that's taking it toofar you've got to like guideline
(28:37):
it the.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
The line in the sand for me is really the how do you
interact, or how do you like tobe interacted with?
What is your interactionpreference?
Slack, email, call what's thebest way to work with you?
Just knowing that can be superbeneficial.
And then, I think, on top ofthat, just understanding the
personality a little bit, Idon't see that as a bad thing at
(29:03):
all.
I think that could really help.
And having this, you know, maybehaving them take like a thing
like this, like hey, what's your, what's your, you know,
appreciation, love, language,and they're like yeah, I
actually really like qualitytime, believe it or not, and I'm
like ah, I guess that for you,but I'll make sure that we have
like you know, one-on-ones wherewe talk to each other and
(29:27):
actually like get to know eachother, kind of thing, like
because that could be meaningful.
That could be the differencebetween them being motivated and
continuing to work and want tostay here, versus here's a $20
gift card.
You did great.
And they're like cool, this isgoing in the trash, I didn't
need this, yep.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
Absolutely, and you know what I think could take
that, even like one step furtherhaving the option to share,
like something personal, likehey, a little bit about me.
You know I have two kids, fourdogs and one goldfish named
larry the goldfish, and larry ismy best friend and like having
the option super weird.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
Just hold on, hold on .
I gotta stop you right there.
Like we cannot prove you havetwo kids, four dogs and a
goldfish and you name thegoldfish and the goldfish is
your best friend.
Like I am now worried you are aserial killer listen I'm not
here to judge.
We've gone too far.
Now I need to know less.
(30:18):
I need to know less about youbecause I'm afraid that you're
going to cut me into littlebitty pieces and feed me to
Larry.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
It's happened before.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
It'll happen again, man, that is a human-sized
amount of fish food you have onyour wall back there, Like it's
just a human-sized amount, Like160 pounds Weird.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
You also have a dehydrator back there.
Is that what you're making?
Are you homemade?
Speaker 1 (30:44):
fish food Weird.
You could fit at least half abody in that thing, right?
Speaker 2 (30:51):
So, like I, mean half a body.
How big is that dehydrator?
How big is that dehydrator,leonard?
Yeah, I think you could fitprobably like two arms and a
head in there.
What do you think?
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Oh yeah, that's definitely a two arm and a head
in there.
What do you think?
Oh yeah, that's definitely atwo-arm and a head dehydrator
for sure.
I noticed you wear rubbergloves all the time.
That's interesting.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Yeah, what's your appreciation language?
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Physical touch?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Great, no touching but this is, I think, like a
cool addition to if you have aworkplace guide is like, if you
want, you can put a personalthing in there.
Cause how awesome would it beif, like, someone's joining new
and you're like, oh, before Iset up a meeting, I'll check out
their notes of how to work bestwith them.
Like okay, cool, like I justlearned a little bit about them
(31:38):
and then I can make a morepersonal connection than just a
work connection.
And some people might say, yeah, I like to keep working life
separate, so no person nopersonal notes, which is totally
cool, I guess that's totallycool, yeah, so anyways, I think
that could be a really cooladdition in the workplace.
That, agree, some people thinkis pretentious, but I think
people are so different and likehaving something like this with
(31:59):
the right guidelines, couldhelp your workplace be basically
build a much better culture,because you're treating each
other like humans I mean withoutharping on these people anymore
, but like the, the very peoplewho'd be like I don't want this
guide.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
This is some hippy dippy nonsense.
It's like you should absolutelyhave the guide and put that in
there.
It's like, yes, I hate thisstuff because I'm gonna go into
that meeting and talk to youcompletely differently than I'm
going to talk to anyone else andyou're going to appreciate the
fact that I'm talking to youdifferently.
Like they don't even realizethat the benefit that could come
to this for them.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Yeah, I a hundred percent agree with you.
So, going all the way back tohow and where, yeah, one-on-ones
and final others.
Some people this book claimslike written appreciation so
they can file away the logs,logs.
Archive it and have it allwritten down so that they can
reference it in the futurethat's weird.
That's I mean, like you know,for me that's weird I can kind
(32:56):
of see it because, like even forme, like when you get
appreciate, when you're a type,a person who's been successful
in the workplace, you've gottena lot of praise.
Yeah, you're not gonna be ableto recall all that praise, right
like it's just like sometimesone in one ear, the other
whatever.
Well, what's sometimes nice islike when you get a note from
the ceo or big boss and theysend you something personal.
(33:16):
It's like that's kind of niceto file away, to be like that
was cool.
Will I ever look at it again, II don't know, but it was kind
of cool Huh.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Well, I mean, I've never, I've never thought of
that before, so I'm I'm glad youbrought it up and it's
something I'm going to have toask about, because I wouldn't
assume someone actually wantedit in writing, versus, you know,
hearing the CEO tell you you'regreat, we love you yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Yeah, it's interesting, so I can.
I can see it, so I could agree,like that could be, that would
be something that I would haveappreciated in former roles.
Last one is, as we talked about,public affirmation, like
telling everybody in front ofeverybody.
Some people love to be on thestage, the rah, rah, the
exciting stuff.
That is what some people wantand what they strive for.
(33:59):
So I think that covers the howyou can say more than just
praising for accomplishments andtake it out of just a base
level thing, you know, lean intothe affirmation of the
character, praise forpersonality traits.
That always takes it a couplesteps deeper.
The one thing that I think isstill controversial is praise
can go too far, and I think yourSlack channel of shout outs has
(34:22):
taken it too far and praise hasbecome shallow.
They talk about this a lot asyou have to avoid shallow praise
and by doing what you said andjust saying great job.
You sent an email like justwant to give you some kudos,
like that makes all the praisejust noise.
It's like who cares?
Like on to the next thing thatdoesn't really matter.
I don't care how many timesjohnny has been called out in
(34:42):
this channel.
Everybody gets called out inthis channel, everybody gets
called out in this channel.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
I don't look at it anymore for that reason.
It's just noise to me.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I think that's the controversial thing.
It's like if you're alwayssaying great job to everybody,
then everybody looks at it likein one ear, out the other who
cares?
He tells everybody good job, Idon't care what Bruce says.
Speaker 1 (35:05):
That's my question.
I don't care what Bruce says,so that's kind of my.
That's my question.
Right, like this is I thinkabout this when I have
one-on-ones of people is youknow I have a good team, and
when my team does a good job, Ialways tell them like I always
try and tell them like hey,really appreciate what you did
with that Turned out great.
Like thank you.
Like am I?
(35:27):
Am I over burning theappreciation to the team by
always doing that Like, should Inot say anything?
Should I be quiet?
Should I sit there, stare atthem during the one-on-one say
nothing?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Usually tell them about your dehydrator.
That helps.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Oh, okay, I'll show them Leonard the goldfish and
we'll we'll have thatconversation.
It was Larry.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Leonard is the fish food maker.
For oh, leonard, yeah, yeah,leonard is the fish food maker
for larry.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
That's the did leonard name larry.
Is that what happened?
He definitely named larry, okay, I want to know.
I mean, he has two kids, butyou didn't mention a wife, so we
know what happened there.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Yes, fish food fish food he didn't.
If you didn't put that together, no, I, I did some.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
Some filmmakers show, others tell I think you just
went right into the tell yes,absolutely.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
And I think what you didn't realize about this
working with leonard guide isyou got to read between the
lines a little bit on what'sactually happening in their
lives.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
When you read that, yeah, no, I, I picked it up.
I picked it up, I think I'mnext, I think I'm next, I think
I'm next to be fish food, 100%.
Well, this is a lot to take in.
So when you took the test, Itook the test when did words of
affirmation rank with you?
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Surprisingly, it was my top, which I did not expect
Really Big reveal.
I was not expecting that to bemy top.
I thought and we'll get intothis later my top would be acts
of service, because I alwaysappreciate when my team and
others do a good job and theyhelp accomplish a shared task.
But I guess words ofaffirmation is pretty big for me
(36:58):
.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
So, based on your test that I took, which I'm, I'm
not I'm not blaming you forthis, but I did find frustrating
.
Sometimes there was like anoption of like, do you want a
gift card, or do you want themto say thank you, and I'm like I
want them do their damn jobs.
Uh, so my option was not there,but, uh, words of affirmation
(37:21):
was number two for me, because,uh, it was the better choice of
the choices I could pick.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I think we might need to
find a better quiz to prove outthe one to validate us, but
before we send it to our discord, okay, we should probably find
something that we like and feelsright before this series ends,
we'll take another quiz and seeexactly where we lie on on the
scale.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
But yeah, for me words of affirmation was number
two, not number one.
That's interesting yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
so I think the one thing and maybe we'll get to
this at the end of the seriesit's like, well, how do you find
or how do you ask, like, whatis their appreciation language
like?
To be honest with you, evenreading this, there's so many
things like I never even thoughtof that.
I'm like, oh yeah, I like Ilike this aspect of that or I
don't like this aspect of that,and I've never even like put
that together of, oh yeah,situations in my career that I
(38:13):
haven't liked things.
I'm like that was the reasonwhy, and so that's why I kind of
like going through these, youknow, as we're talking about the
different types of praise, howand where, avoiding shallow
praise, like all that is superrelevant to how I feel
appreciated and why sometimesit's effective and sometimes
it's not.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
I couldn't agree more , and you know I just have to
say I went into this superskeptical and this whole thing
sounded real hippy dippy to me.
It was very woo woo you knowwhat I'm saying so like I was
not on board.
But this, this first breakdownyou've done here, I feel
educated.
I feel like I was not on board,but this first breakdown you've
done here, I feel educated.
I feel like I've learned athing.
So, thank you, that's whatwe're here for Learning a thing
(38:52):
Breaking down my barriers andboundaries and lifting me and
building me back up.
You know that's not easy to do,clark.
Not many people can do that,especially the people I work
with those trash bags.
You, however, you have theskills that kill when it comes
to making me feel like I canreally do the things you talked
(39:14):
about on this episode and put aseries together.
Wow, award worthy.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Thanks, clark I feel so appreciated right now I'll
tell you what I will do anotherepisode of this podcast with you
.
Retention, that's what you werehoping for.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Technically it's not an episode, it's a post show,
but yes, I do hope that you will.
Hey, you know, if our listenersmaybe haven't gotten involved
in the Discord before, you cando so right now, right this very
moment.
There's a sale actually whereyou can join our Discord for the
lowest of prices A tap, all ittakes, one tap.
(39:53):
I know you got a lot of taps inyou.
This isn't like I'm asking foryou know a billion taps.
I'm asking for one tap and thenmaybe like two or three taps to
kind of get set up.
But open your show notes, usethat powerful digit of yours, or
maybe, if you don't have handswe're not judging whatever you
(40:16):
need to do to make that linkblue, click on all the things.
Join our, our Discord.
Okay, all right, spin that tapwisely, get in our Discord and
join the conversation.
We will have a survey up allabout this very topic, this very
series that Clark has soeloquently put together for us.
(40:37):
Join in, join us, won't youPlease?
For one tap.
That's it Great job For one tap,that's it.
Great job.
No you.
What else do we want them to do?
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I think you nailed it .
I mean share, please Share us.
That's the biggest way.
Yeah, you can get more ofpeople listening to this.
We can create a bettercorporate world for all of us
who are stuck working for thecorporate evil or overlords.
That's the only way.
Share with people you like,share with people you don't like
, especially if you don't likethem.
Tell them to listen to this,because maybe they'll turn their
(41:15):
whole life around, they'll havea real transformation moment
and then they'll be better towork with.
Who?
Speaker 1 (41:20):
knows, we don't grow as a species by dividing.
We don't.
We grow by making a large humanpyramid where we tie our hands
to the feet of the people belowus.
And when every single personmakes this shape together, we
(41:41):
will ascend.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
We grow, yeah, yeah, I think that's all we've got
this week.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Yeah, no, join us, we grow.
Yeah, yeah I think that's allwe've got this week.
Yeah, no, join us.
Join us, tie your hands to myfeet.
Please, I will gladly tie yourfeet to my hands if you join us
and we will make this humanpyramid with all 10 billion
people, we will ascend to theheavens.
They won't be able to stop us.
If we're one giant pyramid,nobody can, nobody, can, nobody,
(42:07):
can.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
I mean, the pyramid is the most powerful shape, so
everything is made from thepyramid.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
That's why the aliens gave us the shape.
They came down, they told thePharaoh.
They said look, you're powerful, but you're not all powerful.
What you need to do?
Go out, get some dirt, spit inthat dirt, turn that dirt into
clay, take that clay, roll it upa hill, put more clay on top of
(42:33):
that clay.
Look what you got?
Triangle.
But it's not a triangle, it's afour-sided triangle with a
square on the bottom.
We must make the shape withbodies.
We must tie ourselves together.
Corporate Strategy the podcast.
That could have been an email.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark.
(42:54):
I think we need to go back andjust do it over again.
You know like I think we shouldstart over.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
Start from the top.
I felt like it was a littlerocky.
It was our first one of theseries.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
Yeah, Give us a little break.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Let.
I felt like it was a littlerocky.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
It was our first one of the series yeah, I gave us a
little break.
Let's run it back.
I'm still not feeling it.
I think we should roll back thetape, but until then, you're on
mute.
We'll see you next week.
So then I said get your hands off that squeegee.
(00:05):
And they're like I'm not goingto do it.
And I'm like well then, I'mcalling the police.
So that's where that ended.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
So did the guy that was walking the alpaca ever make
it across the street?
Speaker 1 (00:21):
No, and the wild thing was there was an Arby's
Right behind him.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Wow, yeah, I just can't believe.
This all started With a sack ofmagic beans that you got from
your neighbor.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Even, even weirder than that, it was a Tuesday.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Do you think it's because you accidentally used
suntan lotion instead oftoothpaste on your toothbrush?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
That could definitely be a part of it, and the water
was coming out in reverse.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
And the water was coming out in reverse.
See, you never think of thosethings when you're traveling to
the East Coast and like yourworld is just flipped upside
down, I know.
And that's why it should havebeen an email.
Welcome back to CorporateStrategy, the podcast.
That could have been an email.
I'm Clark and he's Bert.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
He doesn't get to talk.
This is the Clark Show.
I mean technically it is so goahead.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Oh, what a time.
It's almost Independence Day.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Yeah, our listeners have already passed Independence
Day.
This is a Monday.
Yeah, they're're like, what areyou talking?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
about it's not independence day.
Yikes, you're right, and we'relike we're ahead a little bit
too.
So this is like way past.
This is, oh man, I just brokethe whole like time sequence the
continuum is just snapped forour listeners.
I'm sorry, sorry.
I'm sorry.
I did that to you.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Let's just start over .
I'll cut out the beginning,don't worry, let's start over.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Go ahead, do it again .
No, no, no.
I think you got to enter us tobe correct this time?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Welcome back to another episode of
CorporateStrategybiz, thepodcast that could have been an
email of CorporateStrategybiz,the podcast that could have been
an email.
I'm Clark.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
I'm.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Bruce.
Hey Bruce, Tell me about yourquips today.
What are you quipping?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Oh, I've got the quips aplenty.
They call me the quippinator.
I ordered a sandwich to run onmy quiptendo and it's just let
me tell you it's Quipulating itcomes with a bag of Quips.
Oh, quips and Queso.
(02:53):
Wow, I feel like we're ending.
Let's roll it back, let's do it, let's start over again.
I think we need to start over,yeah.
Third time.
It does the charm, go ahead.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Oh, okay, me again.
Howdy y'all.
Welcome back to another episodeof CorporateStrategybiz, the
podcast.
That could have been an email.
How y'all doing out there?
I'm Clark, I'm Clark, I'm Bruce.
I feel like we're in a Rick andMorty episode.
(03:27):
We're just going through everysingle dimension and we're just
coming out of somethingdifferent.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
One of these is good.
Trust me, one of these willwork.
We'll get there.
We'll get there.
One of them will be a good one,I promise One day.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
I mean, what episode is this 171?
Speaker 1 (03:42):
170.
170.
Wait, what episode is this?
171?
170.
1-7-0.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Wait, no, no, this is 171, isn't it?
No, no, because we ended it on.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Oh, you're right, it is 171.
Yeah, yep, you're right, man,you're right.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
The continuum is broken, Like we are time warping
right now.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It's scary.
Well, 169 was the end of theshow, so it's really hard to
keep counting after the showends.
That was our last episode, so Idon't really know how we do the
numbers henceforth.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
I don't know where we are.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Episode two you and me Starting over Episode two.
Yeah, but we're not starting.
This is the end.
I mean it's the end, it's over,we're in the aftermath.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
We're in the afterlife.
The post show, this is all postshow.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's what itis.
This is just the post show.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Welcome to the post show episode 169, part two.
This is 169, well, technicallyit's 169, part three.
Yep, Part of our series ofepisodes that we're doing per
Clark's insistence on lovelanguages.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Absolutely Well, not love languages because it's the
workplace, but appreciationlanguages for the workplace.
That is the mini series we areon.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
And love languages with extra steps.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Yeah yeah, love languages with extra steps, but
don yeah, love languages withextra steps, but don't kiss your
coworkers, don't touch, notouching, no, touchy, no touchy.
So in the last episode shouldwe just jump right into it?
Absolutely All right, let's doit.
Let's do it.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Maybe we should start over one more time.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Should we?
It might get weird.
I'm a little scared, to behonest.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
I don't know where the next one's going to go Maybe
just keep going, just in case.
All right, I'll keep going,okay.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
You ready?
Yeah, you're not ready.
I'm looking at you right now.
You're not ready.
I can see it in your beadylittle eyes.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
I'm not going to do anything.
Go talk about your lovelanguage.
Come on, let's hear it.
What language of love do weneed to learn?
Speaker 2 (05:47):
No, touching Appreciation languages, thank
you.
So in the last episode weintroed the topic appreciation
languages in the workplace.
How important appreciation isfor the people around you, but
sadly not everybody feelsappreciated in the same way.
People feel appreciateddifferently, and that's why this
(06:11):
book was written.
The five appreciation languagesbasically coming off the whole
entire, to your point, the lovelanguages, which is relationship
, how do you express and howdoes your partner express love?
This is very similar, but inthe workplace no love, no touch,
no love.
And this is how you feelappreciated in the workplace.
(06:31):
And so in the initial one wegave an overview of all five of
the appreciation languages.
There may be more, we'll talkabout that.
They have outlined in this book.
So words of affirmation,quality time talk about that.
That they have outlined in thisbook.
So words of affirmation,quality time, acts of service.
(06:53):
The last one is gifts.
I guess is how we say it, sotangible gifts is what they
specifically call it.
And then the last one isappropriate, I'm going to say
that out loud so everybody hearsit again Appropriate, physical
touch, very important.
No touching, no touching, justdon't.
And if you do, just don't.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
How about that?
Just don't Best advice I cangive you.
Just don't, Just don't do it.
So today in our mini-series,we're going into the and we also
have the poll live on theDiscord.
I've got to cut in.
Thank you, there's a poll.
That's live on the discordright now.
Go fill it out, because we wantto use data from your
(07:28):
participation to help informupcoming episodes.
So do that.
Please continue clark yeah,I'll be.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I'll be really curious to those poll results of
what you think your yourappreciation language is.
And then there's a quiz quizthat both Bruce and I took to
determine what is our primaryand what is our secondary
appreciation place in theworkplace.
And so we will probably publishthat quiz at some point,
because I'd be curious.
You think it's this.
Now take the quiz, let's seewhat it actually might be, and
(07:59):
maybe it's a bad quiz.
We will be the judge of thatonce we get there.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Can I ask a question before we move on?
Did what you think you werematched up with what you were?
No, okay, interesting, whatabout you?
We'll save that then.
I didn't know what this waswhen you gave me the quiz, so I
was like I don't know, I don'tknow what.
I'm doing, I'm just answering.
I'm answering questions thatare being asked of me, so
(08:23):
answering.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
I'm answering questions that are being asked
of me, so I'm just doing thebest I can.
Fair enough, all right.
So let's go into the very firstone Today we are talking about
words, words of affirmation.
That is the first language ofappreciation that we're going to
be talking about, and I thoughtit'd be good for us to talk
about just in general what thisthing is and why it matters.
And then I have kind of fivedifferent vectors, that there's
(08:44):
a whole entire book around thisthat I'm reading that gives
different perspectives on whatthis is and what the different
types of words of affirmationare and how people appreciate
them, because, as you think,like words of affirmation, like
what, for you, comes to mind inthe workplace.
Thank you, thank you, yes.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
You did great Good job.
Okay, wow, I liked it.
You really turned in thatreport.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Yowza, you sent an email, that's really all I can
think of yeah, that's all I got,fair enough.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
I've never heard anything other than those four
specific examples.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Do you get applause every time that you send an
email?
Now I'm really concerned aboutyour day to day.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
There's actual clapping happens behind me, but
when I turn around it's gone.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
So wow, and this this time warp is really throwing
things off, but I think I seewho's doing that in your
background right now.
See who's doing that in yourbackground right now.
Oh good, because I can't, maybeI can help you out.
So the book gives a couple ofthings that really fit into the
(09:55):
words of affirmation.
The first one is praise foraccomplishments.
It's similar to what you'resaying it's like okay, you
accomplished something, youcompleted a big project you did
really well, kind of pulling theteam forward and getting the
right collaboration, and weshould give you praise for that
because it's a job well done,which is, I think, what you were
alluding to and I think isprobably the most common words
of affirmation.
It's just praise foraccomplishments.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
So, and I'm ignorant to all of this, this is very
much like a Clark-led thing.
So I have questions and I'msorry for our listeners if I
seem exceptionally stupid inthis regard.
But praise for accomplishments,Like, we're literally just
saying like as far asappreciation language goes, this
(10:42):
is its own category, separateand apart from the others.
So when I say like hey, Craig,great job recording that podcast
, that's me asserting anappreciation language to Craig
and this actually motivatesCraig, according to the book.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yes, If Craig is motivated by this.
Yes, if this is a love orappreciate.
I know you got it stuck in myhead, you dirty dog.
If this is my appreciationlanguage, this could be one of
the vectors.
But everybody, even if yourwords of affirmation praise
might not actually be that thingthat you care about, but for
some people there are otherthings, that kind of categories.
(11:22):
Yes, subcategories, if you willso, yes, praise this one's
really basic.
I think everyone understands it.
The book.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
not everyone's affected by it.
Right Like and that's whatwe're saying here is there are
different personality types thatare impacted in different ways.
Praise and affirmation.
You might think that Craiglikes me telling him he did a
good job recording the podcast,but Craig doesn't actually care,
like that's literally water off, correct back Cause he's a
(11:50):
beaver and beavers don't havethe ability to retain water yeah
.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Yeah, exactly yeah, that oil, definitely yeah, as
natural as skin keeps the water,just yeah, we got it.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I'm just keeping a level.
I'm making sure I understandthis as you go through, so
continue.
Yeah, you got it.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
So, yes, so some people like are all about the
praise, like, anytime you doanything, give them claps,
whatever, like in general, thatis what a lot of people think of
is when they think of words ofaffirmation.
But, to your point, some peoplelike Craig, even though that
might be happening, some peoplejust might not appreciate that.
(12:31):
Okay, whatever, like good job,that doesn't mean anything to me
.
So the study basically saysthat, just in general, keeping
praise top of your mind whenthings happen and praising
others is a good thing to do.
People will be more motivatedand you can kind of blanket
everybody pretty muchappreciates everybody getting
accomplishments and praise forthose accomplishments when they
happen.
However, there are ways tomaximize this, to make it even
more effective for the personthat you are giving praise to,
and that goes into two differentcategories.
(12:53):
Some people appreciate when youtalk about their character, you
give them an affirmation ofcharacter.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Like hey.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Bruce, your integrity and reporting that potentially
security vulnerability thatpeople have been exploiting was
really great and it helped usprotect our company from bad
actors.
Thank you for being such agreat part of our team.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
I feel great I don't know why.
Feel motivated.
I feel really motivated to justdo more work.
I love it.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
I feel really motivated to just do more work.
I love it, but basically somepeople look for that as like
take it beyond just the greatjob to tell them about something
that's deep and core to themand basically add that in to the
praise.
So honesty, integrity,compassion, things like that
basically affirms theircharacter and goes deeper than
just one level, and so callingthose things out and even
(13:43):
thinking about those thingsallows you to be more effective
to people who may be feeling ormay need this appreciation
language in the workplace.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
So, level one, tier one, thank you, you did a great
job, hey.
Team good work today.
Team good work today.
Tier two hey Clark, I reallyappreciated the way that you
handled that delicate situationwith the foreigners.
They get a little uppity, youknow, because they're not from
(14:15):
the United States, and youreally brought that foreign
class to them.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
You feel motivated.
I think you got to go one leveldeeper, like saying, hey, I
really appreciated how, wheneveryone was down in the dumps
about missing the projectdeadline, you were there for
them.
You showed empathy and you wereable to rally the team around
and encourage them that theycould continue on.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So it's almost like you're singling out while making
everyone else look bad.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Well, this, this could be not in front of
everybody, it could beindividual, yeah yeah, this is
definitely a private thing toconsider yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
So you can take that private and affirm the character
.
When Bruce really fumbled thatpodcast example earlier, you
kind of held the whole thingtogether.
People were going tounsubscribe and if it wasn't for
your correction, God knows whathappened.
Thanks for that.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Yep, it's going one level deeper.
It's not just saying hey,thanks for saving the podcast,
you're going one level deeper.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Yeah, reaching down to the bus yeah, exactly, you
really gotta like slide overthem, but you gotta call out a
new character trait along theway.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
So I think you're getting there.
We'll see at the end of this ifyou figure this out, I'm
learning.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
yeah, all right, I going to use these on my team.
No touching, though, yeah notouching.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Please don't use that on your team.
They would not appreciate that.
A next level to that, whichalso can make this more
effective, is the praise forpersonality.
So we kind of mentioned itbefore.
I think there's differencesbetween things that are
character-based honesty,integrity, compassion versus
things that arepersonality-based.
Hey, you are always soorganized when you do your work
(15:47):
and I always feel disorganizedwhen I'm doing mine, but you
really help me understand what'sgoing on in your space and it's
really easy for me tounderstand.
So thank you for being soorganized within your work,
because I think it makes ourwhole organization better.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
So calling out the specific personality trait.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
No, you can't do that .
Don't do that.
Hr is not liking that.
It's not a physicalcharacteristic, oh okay, it's a
personality characteristic.
You're getting there, try again.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Okay, try again.
Come on, all right.
I really like the way you takethe time to explain things to
people, even though they'reabsolutely incapable of learning
.
You have this energy that youexude and a willingness to put
up with really frustratingsituations and persevering
(16:34):
through.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
That was great, very good.
I feel so motivated.
I feel like I'm ready to runthrough a wall.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
Oh, wow, I'm learning .
Okay, all right, so we got tierone, tier two, tier three.
Does it go?
Speaker 2 (16:49):
deeper.
So now it kind of goes intothat's how you can be effective
in giving praise.
However, now it comes down tothe how and where.
To your point earlier.
Like not everybody wants to begiven these words of affirmation
in front of everybody, likesome people just don't want that
they're like, I don't like tobe called out in front of crowds
(17:09):
.
Maybe I'm a little more?
This is what I was wondering,this one is really important
because, even though you think,as a good boss like I, always
give praise, I call them up tothe stage and from everybody, I
rally them on Little did youknow?
Some people hate that.
That is.
Their worst fear is gettingpublicly acknowledged, even
though they want to beacknowledged for their work.
They want to be told they'redoing a good job.
They don't want it to be infront of everybody.
(17:30):
Hmm, I actually this one'sinteresting.
I have a person on my team.
We give out like a you know MVPaward, if you will, and we have
our own buzz on it or whateverevery year to like one person as
part of our large organization.
And they got it.
And their worst fear came true.
They were brought up on stagein front of everybody and
afterwards they told me I didn'tknow this.
(17:52):
They were like hey, just so youknow.
That was an absolute nightmarefor me.
I was sweating through myclothes.
I hated every second of havingto go up there.
Wow, please, if you can do notlet that happen again.
And I had no idea and I'm like.
I felt so bad because I'm likewhy wouldn't you want to Like?
Because I'm OK with that,that's OK for me from like a
words of affirmation perspective.
(18:13):
I'm fine being in front ofpeople I didn't even think about
.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
How do they want to be recognized and interesting
and for me I'm I'm alwaysreluctant to praise my team in a
public space, so like we evenhave a shout outs channel on our
Slack and if my coworkerslistening they're probably
laughing when I said that outloud because it's kind of it's
(18:39):
kind of turned into like a backpadding ceremonial place where
it's like congratulations forchecking your email, you did
your job today.
Hey, love you.
So I don't give my team anykind of public shout out, but I
always try to make sure that Irecognize and give words of
specifically affirmation andpraise and call out specifically
what they did.
(18:59):
Well, privately, because I feellike you can't ever muck that
up right.
Like I don't know if the bookhas anything right, like yeah, I
don't know if the book hasanything to say about this, but
like I don't think anyonespecifically doesn't like their
manager saying hey, you didreally good, thanks for doing
that.
You know, like privately,publicly, I can see that being a
problem, so I just don't do it.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , and there's there's one more
vector to that.
But I want to finish thisconversation because I actually
think there is a case where whatyou just said is not good.
But I'm going to bring thatcontroversial thing up.
Sure, let's go together.
(19:45):
Or if I'm working with someone,that's great.
Some people like it in front ofothers and maybe it's not
others, as in large groups itcould be like just their team,
people they know, people they'recomfortable with, they're like
yeah, this is like I would loveto be recognized in front of the
peers that I work with everyday, that I trust and I know do
good work.
I don't care about everybodyelse, I just want to be
recognized in front of them sothey know that I'm doing good
work as well, and then I'mgetting this praise in front of
(20:05):
them.
It would make me feel proud.
So some people like small groupkind of words of affirmation
outside of one-on-ones and notin the larger setting which I
never really thought of.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
That too, I can see that I didn't know there'd be a
difference, but I guess it makessense yeah, I, I do do that, I
do give shout outs and like theteam calls, but never in the big
calls, I leave that to the bigwigs.
Yeah for sure.
And I think it means more right.
Like if you get, if you get theaffirmation from like CEO, cmo,
(20:35):
and they're like yeah, you rockCraig, then it's like well, I
mean, Bruce always told me Irocked and I quit believing him
after a while.
But like when CEO says it, wow,that really makes my heart
sparkle.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
It was meaningful, right Because?
You have less interaction.
So when it happens it's kind ofrare.
It's not like this continualthing.
Okay, whatever Bruce thinks I'mcool, we talk every day.
Ceo that never talked to mylife has recognized me for work
that they know I did.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
That's a big deal, but I's it is important to
understand if that person wantsit publicly or privately.
Yeah, uh, I I, I can see that Ican even see that for me a
little bit.
I definitely like the moreprivate praise than public.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Yeah, yeah it's so difficult, like as I was
thinking about this, because,like, as you're giving out a big
award, it's usually a surprisefor the person getting it.
You know what I mean.
Like most of the time it's likeit's supposed to be now.
The winner of our MVP of thequarter award for the best sales
numbers come up on stage andthen they announced the name
(21:37):
Like they don't really knowahead of time.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
So like that was a tough one, cause, like how do
you get ahead of that to be likeyeah, especially if you put
like your employees in for it,you know it's like oh yeah, I
put craig in for this, like Ithink, I think craig can win it
yeah, oh, craig hates absolutelyyeah like this is their literal
worst nightmare to have to goon stage.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
This one's tough because it's like big things
like that it's sometimes hard toavoid because you don't want to
like bring them into one-on-one, be like hey, bruce, I know you
don't want to go up on stage.
You're in for a big award ifyou do win.
Would you be okay with themcalling you out on stage, or
would you rather not let thathappen?
It just feels awkward I don'tknow.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
I feel like we've kind of missed the mark on
behavior in general with peoplebecause we're so focused on like
, hey, what?
What's your t-shirt size and doyou like chocolate or vanilla
ice cream on your cake?
But like it really should be,hey, is it okay if I like give
you a shout out to the wholecompany on our slack like, would
(22:42):
you like that, versus like mejust telling you you did a great
job?
Like I feel like we should behaving those kind of
conversations to reallyunderstand what the person likes
and what that would motivatethem and make them feel good.
And even I feel like evenhaving that conversation I don't
know what the book says aboutthis, but like asking people
about their specific preferencein words for affirmation like
(23:05):
that in itself shows a care andattention and a respect for the
employee that I feel like youdon't really ever get right.
It's like, oh, they actuallycare about what I want, not just
doing something because theydon't want me to quit my job.
Like that that seems reallynice.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Yeah, yeah, it makes it more human because it's like
it's less about the corporatismof it and it's more about how do
you want to feel appreciated,which that's what I really like
about this.
Like to your point, I thinkthere's strategies of you can
probably figure out what someoneis without letting them feel
awkward about it or making themfeel awkward as you're talking
through it, feel awkward asyou're talking through it, but,
(23:46):
like in that situation.
It's just.
It is tough because, likeusually, those things happen in
a public setting, in front ofeverybody.
And we're just assuming thateverybody is okay with that and
that literally might be theirworst nightmare to have that
happen and they might leave.
And you're like why would theyleave?
Like I just gave them the bestaward that everybody gets all
year.
Like what happened?
And they basically come backand say, hey, you didn't ask me
my preferences about how I feltand wanted to be recognized and
(24:09):
I just don't feel comfortablelike having that happen to me
again.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
And it's.
You know, I'm not.
This might sound like ageneralization, but in tech
specifically, there's a lot ofvery different types of
personalities and preferenceswhen it comes to communication
and recognition and publicspeaking it's.
I think it's crucial if you arein a space where folks are not
(24:35):
all the same a type personality,you get to the bottom of, like
what do they want, what do theylike, before you put them in for
something.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Absolutely, and it's you know, something that you and
I may have talked about I don'tknow that we've talked about it
on this podcast, but issomething I I've seen that has
controversial reviews is, in aworkplace, having a working with
Bruce guide that every newemployee basically has to fill
out, and so they fill out forthemselves.
This is how I operate best.
(25:03):
This is how working with mewill go well, interesting, yeah,
and so like, fill out forthemselves.
This is how I operate best.
This is how working with mewill go well, interesting, yeah,
and so like they define, hey,working with me.
Just so you know I'm a morningperson.
I love to have my focus time inthe morning to accomplish my
tasks, and when you're readingmy working with Clark book, you
would learn all this about me tobe like, okay, I'll avoid
scheduling meetings in themorning because that's when they
like to do all their work, andI'll save it for the afternoon.
(25:25):
Or, hey, during lunch, like Ilike to just put my headphones
on and kind of stay to myself.
But I also love playing pingpong.
Like I would love to play pingpong in the afternoons with, you
know, some of some of thecoworkers, if I can and so, like
I've seen mixed reviews on, isthat pretentious, like if you
need a guide just to be a humanand work with people.
(25:46):
Like is that pretentious or isthat actually a good thing,
because everybody's just sodifferent?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
See, I know what I'm about to say will probably make
some people go hippy, dippy, woo, woo, like oh, there goes the
participation trophy group again.
But I truly think that's agreat idea and it's not because
(26:12):
I want it for myself, butbecause I deeply care about the
well-being and happiness ofeveryone I work with.
Like work sucks, it reallysucks.
And I think if everyone filledout that little book or if they
had a little bio about them intheir Slack profile or whatever
and it's the first time you'reworking with someone, maybe it's
(26:33):
the first time you're going toa meeting, you check that and
you're like oh, they actuallysaid they don't like high energy
.
So I'm not going to come intothis being bombastic and trying
to make the sale.
Instead, I'm going to focus on,like having a meaningful
conversation, listening to whatthey have to say.
Like I feel like that canreally set you up for good
relationship, success withpeople, good first impressions.
(26:54):
You know, knowing how to workwith people like that could be
huge.
But I think there's a.
Unfortunately there is a groupof people out there and it's a
pretty big group that sees anykind of new age recognition of
mental health and, you know,psychology and personal
(27:16):
well-being as weakness andthey're like, oh, we didn't have
this and we did the copier workin the 1980s, we don't need it
today.
And it's like, well, yeah, youdidn't know about it back then,
but, like we understand now, youknow.
Like this is a.
This is a much better way forus to work.
I mean, we saw thistransitioning to agile literally
just you and me moving intolike agile based methodology,
(27:40):
which was a much better way forus to work.
There are people who are soresistant to it, but it made our
lives better.
It made everyone's life better.
So I think this is a great idea.
I love it personally.
Yeah, I'd love to do it.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Like, what you're saying is like every nobody's
you can never make a decisionthat everyone's gonna be happy
with.
Someone will always have aproblem, no matter what you do
and everything can turn yeah,exactly Like everything can turn
to a slippery slope, but set upthe guide rails, say here's the
things we put into it.
We don't put things like, likeit's okay.
If you say, hey, I have apeanut allergy, so if you could
(28:14):
not eat peanuts around me so Idon't die, like that'd be great,
like that's totally fine.
But if you're starting to addin all these optional
preferences to be like, hey, ontuesdays I really don't like the
smell of fish, then I thinkit's getting pretentious.
Where it's like okay, nownobody can eat fish in the
office on tuesdays because larrydoesn't like fish on tuesdays
and like that's taking it toofar you've got to like guideline
(28:37):
it the.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
The line in the sand for me is really the how do you
interact, or how do you like tobe interacted with?
What is your interactionpreference?
Slack, email, call what's thebest way to work with you?
Just knowing that can be superbeneficial.
And then, I think, on top ofthat, just understanding the
personality a little bit, Idon't see that as a bad thing at
(29:03):
all.
I think that could really help.
And having this, you know, maybehaving them take like a thing
like this, like hey, what's your, what's your, you know,
appreciation, love, language,and they're like yeah, I
actually really like qualitytime, believe it or not, and I'm
like ah, I guess that for you,but I'll make sure that we have
like you know, one-on-ones wherewe talk to each other and
(29:27):
actually like get to know eachother, kind of thing, like
because that could be meaningful.
That could be the differencebetween them being motivated and
continuing to work and want tostay here, versus here's a $20
gift card.
You did great.
And they're like cool, this isgoing in the trash, I didn't
need this, yep.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
Absolutely, and you know what I think could take
that, even like one step furtherhaving the option to share,
like something personal, likehey, a little bit about me.
You know I have two kids, fourdogs and one goldfish named
larry the goldfish, and larry ismy best friend and like having
the option super weird.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
Just hold on, hold on .
I gotta stop you right there.
Like we cannot prove you havetwo kids, four dogs and a
goldfish and you name thegoldfish and the goldfish is
your best friend.
Like I am now worried you are aserial killer listen I'm not
here to judge.
We've gone too far.
Now I need to know less.
(30:18):
I need to know less about youbecause I'm afraid that you're
going to cut me into littlebitty pieces and feed me to
Larry.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
It's happened before.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
It'll happen again, man, that is a human-sized
amount of fish food you have onyour wall back there, Like it's
just a human-sized amount, Like160 pounds Weird.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
You also have a dehydrator back there.
Is that what you're making?
Are you homemade?
Speaker 1 (30:44):
fish food Weird.
You could fit at least half abody in that thing, right?
Speaker 2 (30:51):
So, like I, mean half a body.
How big is that dehydrator?
How big is that dehydrator,leonard?
Yeah, I think you could fitprobably like two arms and a
head in there.
What do you think?
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Oh yeah, that's definitely a two arm and a head
in there.
What do you think?
Oh yeah, that's definitely atwo-arm and a head dehydrator
for sure.
I noticed you wear rubbergloves all the time.
That's interesting.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Yeah, what's your appreciation language?
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Physical touch?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Great, no touching but this is, I think, like a
cool addition to if you have aworkplace guide is like, if you
want, you can put a personalthing in there.
Cause how awesome would it beif, like, someone's joining new
and you're like, oh, before Iset up a meeting, I'll check out
their notes of how to work bestwith them.
Like okay, cool, like I justlearned a little bit about them
(31:38):
and then I can make a morepersonal connection than just a
work connection.
And some people might say, yeah, I like to keep working life
separate, so no person nopersonal notes, which is totally
cool, I guess that's totallycool, yeah, so anyways, I think
that could be a really cooladdition in the workplace.
That, agree, some people thinkis pretentious, but I think
people are so different and likehaving something like this with
(31:59):
the right guidelines, couldhelp your workplace be basically
build a much better culture,because you're treating each
other like humans I mean withoutharping on these people anymore
, but like the, the very peoplewho'd be like I don't want this
guide.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
This is some hippy dippy nonsense.
It's like you should absolutelyhave the guide and put that in
there.
It's like, yes, I hate thisstuff because I'm gonna go into
that meeting and talk to youcompletely differently than I'm
going to talk to anyone else andyou're going to appreciate the
fact that I'm talking to youdifferently.
Like they don't even realizethat the benefit that could come
to this for them.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Yeah, I a hundred percent agree with you.
So, going all the way back tohow and where, yeah, one-on-ones
and final others.
Some people this book claimslike written appreciation so
they can file away the logs,logs.
Archive it and have it allwritten down so that they can
reference it in the futurethat's weird.
That's I mean, like you know,for me that's weird I can kind
(32:56):
of see it because, like even forme, like when you get
appreciate, when you're a type,a person who's been successful
in the workplace, you've gottena lot of praise.
Yeah, you're not gonna be ableto recall all that praise, right
like it's just like sometimesone in one ear, the other
whatever.
Well, what's sometimes nice islike when you get a note from
the ceo or big boss and theysend you something personal.
(33:16):
It's like that's kind of niceto file away, to be like that
was cool.
Will I ever look at it again, II don't know, but it was kind
of cool Huh.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Well, I mean, I've never, I've never thought of
that before, so I'm I'm glad youbrought it up and it's
something I'm going to have toask about, because I wouldn't
assume someone actually wantedit in writing, versus, you know,
hearing the CEO tell you you'regreat, we love you yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Yeah, it's interesting, so I can.
I can see it, so I could agree,like that could be, that would
be something that I would haveappreciated in former roles.
Last one is, as we talked about,public affirmation, like
telling everybody in front ofeverybody.
Some people love to be on thestage, the rah, rah, the
exciting stuff.
That is what some people wantand what they strive for.
(33:59):
So I think that covers the howyou can say more than just
praising for accomplishments andtake it out of just a base
level thing, you know, lean intothe affirmation of the
character, praise forpersonality traits.
That always takes it a couplesteps deeper.
The one thing that I think isstill controversial is praise
can go too far, and I think yourSlack channel of shout outs has
(34:22):
taken it too far and praise hasbecome shallow.
They talk about this a lot asyou have to avoid shallow praise
and by doing what you said andjust saying great job.
You sent an email like justwant to give you some kudos,
like that makes all the praisejust noise.
It's like who cares?
Like on to the next thing thatdoesn't really matter.
I don't care how many timesjohnny has been called out in
(34:42):
this channel.
Everybody gets called out inthis channel, everybody gets
called out in this channel.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
I don't look at it anymore for that reason.
It's just noise to me.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I think that's the controversial thing.
It's like if you're alwayssaying great job to everybody,
then everybody looks at it likein one ear, out the other who
cares?
He tells everybody good job, Idon't care what Bruce says.
Speaker 1 (35:05):
That's my question.
I don't care what Bruce says,so that's kind of my.
That's my question.
Right, like this is I thinkabout this when I have
one-on-ones of people is youknow I have a good team, and
when my team does a good job, Ialways tell them like I always
try and tell them like hey,really appreciate what you did
with that Turned out great.
Like thank you.
Like am I?
(35:27):
Am I over burning theappreciation to the team by
always doing that Like, should Inot say anything?
Should I be quiet?
Should I sit there, stare atthem during the one-on-one say
nothing?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Usually tell them about your dehydrator.
That helps.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Oh, okay, I'll show them Leonard the goldfish and
we'll we'll have thatconversation.
It was Larry.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Leonard is the fish food maker.
For oh, leonard, yeah, yeah,leonard is the fish food maker
for larry.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
That's the did leonard name larry.
Is that what happened?
He definitely named larry, okay, I want to know.
I mean, he has two kids, butyou didn't mention a wife, so we
know what happened there.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Yes, fish food fish food he didn't.
If you didn't put that together, no, I, I did some.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
Some filmmakers show, others tell I think you just
went right into the tell yes,absolutely.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
And I think what you didn't realize about this
working with leonard guide isyou got to read between the
lines a little bit on what'sactually happening in their
lives.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
When you read that, yeah, no, I, I picked it up.
I picked it up, I think I'mnext, I think I'm next, I think
I'm next to be fish food, 100%.
Well, this is a lot to take in.
So when you took the test, Itook the test when did words of
affirmation rank with you?
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Surprisingly, it was my top, which I did not expect
Really Big reveal.
I was not expecting that to bemy top.
I thought and we'll get intothis later my top would be acts
of service, because I alwaysappreciate when my team and
others do a good job and theyhelp accomplish a shared task.
But I guess words ofaffirmation is pretty big for me
(36:58):
.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
So, based on your test that I took, which I'm, I'm
not I'm not blaming you forthis, but I did find frustrating
.
Sometimes there was like anoption of like, do you want a
gift card, or do you want themto say thank you, and I'm like I
want them do their damn jobs.
Uh, so my option was not there,but, uh, words of affirmation
(37:21):
was number two for me, because,uh, it was the better choice of
the choices I could pick.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I think we might need to
find a better quiz to prove outthe one to validate us, but
before we send it to our discord, okay, we should probably find
something that we like and feelsright before this series ends,
we'll take another quiz and seeexactly where we lie on on the
scale.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
But yeah, for me words of affirmation was number
two, not number one.
That's interesting yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
so I think the one thing and maybe we'll get to
this at the end of the seriesit's like, well, how do you find
or how do you ask, like, whatis their appreciation language
like?
To be honest with you, evenreading this, there's so many
things like I never even thoughtof that.
I'm like, oh yeah, I like Ilike this aspect of that or I
don't like this aspect of that,and I've never even like put
that together of, oh yeah,situations in my career that I
(38:13):
haven't liked things.
I'm like that was the reasonwhy, and so that's why I kind of
like going through these, youknow, as we're talking about the
different types of praise, howand where, avoiding shallow
praise, like all that is superrelevant to how I feel
appreciated and why sometimesit's effective and sometimes
it's not.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
I couldn't agree more , and you know I just have to
say I went into this superskeptical and this whole thing
sounded real hippy dippy to me.
It was very woo woo you knowwhat I'm saying so like I was
not on board.
But this, this first breakdownyou've done here, I feel
educated.
I feel like I was not on board,but this first breakdown you've
done here, I feel educated.
I feel like I've learned athing.
So, thank you, that's whatwe're here for Learning a thing
(38:52):
Breaking down my barriers andboundaries and lifting me and
building me back up.
You know that's not easy to do,clark.
Not many people can do that,especially the people I work
with those trash bags.
You, however, you have theskills that kill when it comes
to making me feel like I canreally do the things you talked
(39:14):
about on this episode and put aseries together.
Wow, award worthy.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Thanks, clark I feel so appreciated right now I'll
tell you what I will do anotherepisode of this podcast with you
.
Retention, that's what you werehoping for.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Technically it's not an episode, it's a post show,
but yes, I do hope that you will.
Hey, you know, if our listenersmaybe haven't gotten involved
in the Discord before, you cando so right now, right this very
moment.
There's a sale actually whereyou can join our Discord for the
lowest of prices A tap, all ittakes, one tap.
(39:53):
I know you got a lot of taps inyou.
This isn't like I'm asking foryou know a billion taps.
I'm asking for one tap and thenmaybe like two or three taps to
kind of get set up.
But open your show notes, usethat powerful digit of yours, or
maybe, if you don't have handswe're not judging whatever you
(40:16):
need to do to make that linkblue, click on all the things.
Join our, our Discord.
Okay, all right, spin that tapwisely, get in our Discord and
join the conversation.
We will have a survey up allabout this very topic, this very
series that Clark has soeloquently put together for us.
(40:37):
Join in, join us, won't youPlease?
For one tap.
That's it Great job For one tap,that's it.
Great job.
No you.
What else do we want them to do?
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I think you nailed it .
I mean share, please Share us.
That's the biggest way.
Yeah, you can get more ofpeople listening to this.
We can create a bettercorporate world for all of us
who are stuck working for thecorporate evil or overlords.
That's the only way.
Share with people you like,share with people you don't like
, especially if you don't likethem.
Tell them to listen to this,because maybe they'll turn their
(41:15):
whole life around, they'll havea real transformation moment
and then they'll be better towork with.
Who?
Speaker 1 (41:20):
knows, we don't grow as a species by dividing.
We don't.
We grow by making a large humanpyramid where we tie our hands
to the feet of the people belowus.
And when every single personmakes this shape together, we
(41:41):
will ascend.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
We grow, yeah, yeah, I think that's all we've got
this week.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Yeah, no, join us, we grow.
Yeah, yeah I think that's allwe've got this week.
Yeah, no, join us.
Join us, tie your hands to myfeet.
Please, I will gladly tie yourfeet to my hands if you join us
and we will make this humanpyramid with all 10 billion
people, we will ascend to theheavens.
They won't be able to stop us.
If we're one giant pyramid,nobody can, nobody, can, nobody,
(42:07):
can.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
I mean, the pyramid is the most powerful shape, so
everything is made from thepyramid.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
That's why the aliens gave us the shape.
They came down, they told thePharaoh.
They said look, you're powerful, but you're not all powerful.
What you need to do?
Go out, get some dirt, spit inthat dirt, turn that dirt into
clay, take that clay, roll it upa hill, put more clay on top of
(42:33):
that clay.
Look what you got?
Triangle.
But it's not a triangle, it's afour-sided triangle with a
square on the bottom.
We must make the shape withbodies.
We must tie ourselves together.
Corporate Strategy the podcast.
That could have been an email.
I'm Bruce and I'm Clark.
(42:54):
I think we need to go back andjust do it over again.
You know like I think we shouldstart over.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
Start from the top.
I felt like it was a littlerocky.
It was our first one of theseries.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
Yeah, Give us a little break.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Let.
I felt like it was a littlerocky.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
It was our first one of the series yeah, I gave us a
little break.
Let's run it back.
I'm still not feeling it.
I think we should roll back thetape, but until then, you're on
mute.
We'll see you next week.
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