Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption & Foster Care

Question: I was the one who wanted to adopt.  My husband agreed because I wanted it so bad, but now, I’m the one who wishes we hadn’t done it. We adopted a 5-year-old little girl, who is now 7.  The awful truth is that I don’t love this child. I don’t even like her very much. I wish I could turn back the clock.

Resources:

• Creating and Cultivating Attachment (Resource)
• Understanding and Overcoming Blocked Care (Free Cour...

Are you confused about having an open adoption? Do you worry about what this means for your family. Join us today to talk about open adoption with Sara Easterly, an adoptee, Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, a birth parent, and Lori Holden, an adoptive parent. In addition to co-authoring the book, "Adoption Unfiltered", they host a podcast of the same name.

In this episode, we cover:

• What is meant by the term “open...

Question: Hubby and I are finally ready to take the plunge and become foster parents. We wanted to wait until our youngest was in high school. We’ve started listening to your podcast, and you’ve mentioned on several of the shows that we would likely have a choice between the local county child welfare agency and a private agency. Which should we choose?

Resources:

• Choosing a Foster Care Agency (Resource page)
• Becoming a Foster Par...

Do you worry about applying the Reasonable and Prudent Parent Standard as a foster parent? Check out this interview with Rhonda Serrano, a senior attorney at the ABA Center on Children and the Law, and Kate Schultz, the Deputy Director at Foster Family Alliance of North Carolina and a licensed foster parent. 

In this episode, we cover:

• Where does the concept and term for “reasonable and prudent parent” come from?
• What we...

Question: We’ve been waiting for 15 months for an expectant mom to choose us to adopt her baby. We finally got chosen, but I’m filled with fear. Are we the right family for this baby? Are we up to parenting her? Will we be ruining our lives and maybe hers?

Resources:

• Evaluating Risk Factors in Adoption (Resource page)
• Raising a Child with Prenatal Substance Exposure (Resource page)
• Explaining Prenatal Substance Exposure,...

Are you parenting an adopted teen or young adult? Check out our interview about important conversations we need to make sure we have. Our guest is Katie Naftzger ,an LICSW, an adult adoptee, and the author of Parenting in the Eye of the Storm: The Adoptive Parent’s Guide to Navigating the Teen Years. She also has a course for adoptive parents: The Four Paths To Securing The Relationship With Your Adopted Teen Or Young Adult.

Question: My husband and I are seriously considering domestic infant adoption. In my research I have found grants are available for people who want to adopt. We make decent money, but do not want to spend all of our savings on adoption fees when we know expenses will only go up when we have a child. Will filling out applications for grants be a waste of time for us or will they consider us even though we make decent money?

Foster youth or children who have been in the foster care system make up over 80% of children being sexually exploited. What can you do to prevent this from happening to your child? We talk with Audrey Morrissey, Co-Executive Director of My Life My Choice, a survivor-led nonprofit fighting sexual exploitation of youth.

In this episode, we cover:

• What are some of the different forms that sexual exploitation can take?
• What...

Question: I am a nurse and am very aware of the benefits of breast milk. I always imagined I would get breast milk from a milk bank if I adopted. Just recently, I read there aren’t many milk banks around, and they can have a supply issue and be very expensive. I then stumbled upon adoptive parents inducing lactation to feed their adopted baby. How common and easy is this? Is it successful? Does never being pregnant before and havin...

Do you think your child was exposed to alcohol or drugs during pregnancy? If so, a diagnosis can help your child access services and support. Check out this show with Dr. Yasmin Senturias, a developmental-behavioral pediatric specialist with 28 years of experience in developmental pediatrics and prenatal substance exposure. She worked with the American Academy of Pediatrics on developing their FASD Toolkit.

In this episode...

Question: We adopted our son at two, but we were his foster parents since he was three months. He is now in second grade and is really struggling in school both academically and with bad behaviors. His teacher is not open to hearing me talk about trauma and how his trauma is impacting his learning and behavior. I think she thinks that since he’s been with us for almost his entire life that he hasn’t had trauma. We seem to be gettin...

Are you struggling to feel connected to your child? Do you sometimes wish you could turn the clock back and not be parenting this child? If so, you need to listen to this interview with Melissa Corkum, adoptee, adoptive mom, and co-author of Reclaim Compassion: The Adoptive Parent’s Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith.

In this episode, we cover:

• What is blocked care, and how does it differ from ...

Question: We are close to adopting two kids from foster care. Is there somewhere that shows the possible options for things we should ask for in adoption assistance?  I don’t want to rely just on the child welfare office to hopefully tell us all the possible options.

Resources:

• Josh Kroll, Adoption Subsidy Resource Center, Families Rising (Formerly NACAC)
  • joshk@nacac.org
  • 651-644-3036, extension 115
• Foster Care Su...

Are you thinking about domestic infant adoption? This is an interview you must listen to! We talk with adoption medicine pediatrician, Dr. Todd Ochs, about common risk factors you should know about before adopting an infant.

In this episode, we cover:

• Common Risk Factors in Domestic Infant Adoption
  • Lack of prenatal care.
    • Why do expectant moms who are considering making an adoption plan often have limited prenatal ...

Listener Response: An aspect of adopting that we didn’t hear about was how your mental health is challenged throughout the process. It’s a roller coaster of emotions, and this isn’t discussed as often as organic issues such as drug or alcohol use.

Resources:

• Creating a Family Online Support Group
• Adoption Process & Important Considerations
• Self-Care for Parents and Caregivers

This podcast is produced by www.Creat...

Do you want to raise a child that can bounce back from all the hard stuff life throws at them? Join us to talk about this with Dr. Caroline Leaf, a communication pathologist and clinical and cognitive neuroscientist. She is the author of several books, including Switch on Your Brain, Think Learn Succeed, and How to Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess.

In this episode, we cover:

• The mind/brain/body connection.
• The ...

Question: We’ve been waiting for a little over a year, and so far, no birth mom has asked to meet with us. I think we need to revamp our profile book.

Resources:

• What is an Adoptive Parent Profile? (Resource page)
• Understanding the Birth Parent's Experience (Resource page)
• Adoption Process & Important Considerations (Resources)

This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit ...

Nicole Chung, author of All You Can Ever Know, has done it again with another wonderful memoir about growing up as a transracial adoptee and then losing both her adoptive parents. A Living Remedy is a story about family love and loss, regardless of how the family is formed.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Family love. 
  • You were well, if not always perfectly, loved.
  • You were temperamentally different from your parents, es...

Question: We are adopting an 8-year-old little girl from the country of Georgia. I would love some concrete tips on how our family (four bio kids) can best communicate with her and foster attachment despite the language barrier. Are there any tools you can recommend or strategies to help non-English speaking adoptees feel more comfortable in their new environment?

Resources:

• Creating and Cultivating Attachment (Resource...