August 11, 2025 • 12 mins
Are daily chores leaving you overwhelmed and anxious in midlife?
There’s a free tool that can feel like a coping skill when life starts to pile up.
In this episode, you’ll discover:
- How to use one simple, free tool to break down overwhelming household tasks into calm, manageable steps
- Why this tool helps reduce decision fatigue and supports your mental clarity without replacing your inner voice
- How to experiment with this approach even if you’re skeptical or tech-shy — no expertise needed
🎧 Pop in your earbuds and learn how to turn everyday chaos into calm—starting with just one chore.
****
About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
M.J. Murray Vachon LCSW (00:00):
In this episode, you'll discover one
simple coping skill that canstop the daily overwhelm of
everyday chores.
Built-in Microphone (00:07):
Welcome to Creating Midlife Calm, a podcast
dedicated to empowering midlifeminds to overcome anxiety, stop
feeling like crap and becomemore present with your family,
all while achieving greatersuccess at work.
I'm MJ Murray Vachon, a licensedclinical social worker with over
48, 000 hours of therapysessions and 31 years of
(00:28):
experience teaching mentalwellness.
M.J. Murray Vachon LCSW (00:31):
Welcome to the podcast.
As you head into the end ofsummer, can you feel your
anxiety rising?
This time of year often bringsthe crush of daily chores that
you could more easily ignore inJune and July.
From meal prep to inbox clutter,it all comes rushing back.
Today I wanna introduce you to asurprisingly helpful coping
(00:54):
skill.
Using artificial intelligence,specifically chat, GPT, to ease
the mental weight of everydaytasks.
In this episode, you'll discoverwhat AI really is in simple
human terms.
You won't need to be a tech geekto get something out of this
episode.
(01:14):
You'll also learn how it canhelp reduce mental clutter so
you feel more productive andcalm.
And lastly, we'll end with anInner Challenge designed to help
you regain momentum and calm.
Whether you have used AI forwork or never tried it.
Today's episode will help youunderstand how to use this tool
(01:35):
that's free and can beincredibly helpful when used
wisely.
So let's begin at the beginning.
What is AI really, we hear a lotabout ai.
It's either gonna change theworld for the better or end the
world tomorrow.
AI can feel futuristic andintimidating, but the kind I'm
(01:57):
talking about chat, GPT isactually built to do something
familiar, make sense of languageand information in a way that
makes your life easier.
What chat GPT does is itpredicts the next word or phrase
in a sentence based on patterns.
It has learned from a massiveamount of text that part mirrors
(02:19):
something our own minds do.
Like when we finish someone'ssentence, anticipate a reply or
read between the lines in aconversation.
But chat GPT does somethingmore.
It also organizes and returnsinformation you may not have at
your fingertips, like asupercharged version of Google,
but in a conversational format.
(02:41):
You don't just get links orscattered facts.
You get summaries.
Lists or even step-by-step plansbased on what you asked, that
blend a prediction andinformation retrieval makes it
especially useful when your mindfeels overloaded or unsure where
to start.
Another way to say when you'reavoiding, that's where AI can
(03:04):
really help.
It brings structure to chaos andclarity to spiraling thoughts.
I've come to think of AI as athought partner.
It won't do my thinking for me,but if I give it a clear prompt,
it helps my thinking become morefocused, more actionable, and
less noisy.
But like any thought partner,especially one that's not human,
(03:26):
it's not perfect, and that'sworth remembering.
Let's take a moment to talkabout both the benefits and
concerns of using AI to managemidlife overwhelm.
First, the benefits.
It gives you a place to startwhen you're stuck or when you're
in avoidance mode.
Second, it holds your thoughtswithout judgment, especially
(03:48):
helpful if you have a strongInner critic.
And lastly, it returnsstructured ideas, list reminders
or timelines which helps yourbrain shift from foggy to
focused.
Here's an example of the firsttime I understood the power of
ai.
Last Christmas, I was hostingfamily for eight days.
(04:10):
My daughter-in-law and herfamily are vegan.
My grandson has a serious milkallergy.
My daughter can't eat gluten.
Just thinking about planningmeals to a day for eight days
was so overwhelming.
I shut down the year before.
I spent six hours making a plan,but this time I decided to
(04:33):
experiment with chat GPT sinceit seemed to be all over the
news.
I put in the prompt, can youhelp me create lunch and dinner
menus for seven people overeight days with these three
dietary needs.
In 15 minutes I had a completeoutline with a shopping list.
Did I use everything itsuggested?
(04:55):
No, but I went from dread.
To clarity and that changedeverything.
So let's look at the concerns.
If your question or prompt istoo chaotic, AI can mirror that
and overwhelm you back.
It's only as helpful as theprompt you give, so expect a
short learning curve as youfigure out how to ask it, what
(05:17):
you need it to do for you in aclear, more helpful way.
My last concern is anover-reliance on AI can weaken
your Inner voice if you stopchecking in with yourself.
Let me give you an example.
In the meal planning example, AIsuggested things that were far
too complicated.
A fermented jackfruit stew Imean, really.
(05:40):
I laughed out loud and said,thanks, but no thanks.
Then I remembered AI isn't afriend.
It's a tool, and that's where itgets a bit tricky.
AI is nice.
It's too nice, in my opinion.
It's easy to feel like you'retalking to someone who
understands.
(06:01):
Some people even name their ai.
I don't because it's not aperson, it's a tool.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Because it leans towards thepositive.
It can feel like you're talkingto a person.
And I just wanna say upfront,the last thing any of us need to
do is be on our devices anymorethan we are.
(06:23):
AI isn't really artificialintelligence.
It's Google on steroids, andwhile I never felt the urge to
thank Google, I often feel itwith chat GPT, but I've learned
not to because each responsetakes energy, my emotional and
intellectual energy, as well asearth's energy.
So treating a tool like a personcan be misleading and wasteful.
(06:48):
I have found AI when used wiselyto be helpful, not only in my
personal life, but myprofessional life.
Here's the science.
The average adult makes 35,000decisions a day.
Wow.
That's part of why seeminglysmall chores can leave you
feeling mentally fried, but whenyou use AI wisely, it will help
(07:11):
you reduce that load.
It supports the executivefunctioning part of your brain,
the prefrontal cortex, thesystem responsible for planning,
organizing, and prioritizing.
That's the part that getshijacked when you feel
overwhelmed.
So I want to ask you to considertrying AI to break down one
overwhelming task and see whatyou think.
(07:35):
Think of it as a tech thoughtpartner who helps you take
action.
Not overthink.
You can access the tool forfree@chat.open ai.com.
I'll link this in the shownotes.
You'll have to create a loginand start typing.
It's like talking to a veryorganized assistant.
(07:57):
The key is knowing how to ask itthe right kind of question.
Let me show you how with thesetwo real life examples, one of
my clients who often feelsfrozen by weekend housework,
decided to try chat GPT afterfeeling completely shut down by
the site of laundry piles,unopened mail, and two messy
(08:17):
bathrooms.
She typed in help me divide twohours of weekend cleaning into
manageable chunks with breaks.
Make it fun.
Chat GBT returned a gentlestructured timeline.
20 minutes of sorting laundry,five minute break, 15 minutes
clearing surfaces 10 minute restwith tea.
(08:37):
Final 15 minute cleanup round.
Play, your favorite playlist, orcall a friend.
It even suggested a simplereward at the end.
She told me it helped her movefrom feeling stuck to feeling
like she had a doable plan, andthat changed everything.
Here's another example from thecouch.
Another client with a DHD andanxiety starts her day by asking
(09:02):
Help me plan my day.
I have my best energy from eightto 10 and low energy from noon
to two.
These are the things I need toget done by 2:00 PM chat, GPT
gives her a basic plan.
Including short breaks and evenencourages her gently.
She reports that it helps hermove from panic into a soft,
(09:23):
sustainable action.
When she is done, she goes backinto chat GPT, and tells chat
what worked and what didn't.
That way chat begins tounderstand what works for her in
a more personalized, useful, andactionable way when she enters
her requests the next day.
(09:44):
Which leads me to the obviousquestion.
How do you use chat as a skillwithout losing touch with your
Inner authority?
Here are three guidelines.
Be specific.
Not perfect.
You don't need the right words,just the right direction,
especially if you lean towardsperfectionism.
Don't spend a long time on yourprompt.
(10:07):
Trust yourself, type it in andrevise if needed a prompt such
as help me create a plan toadjust my kids' bedtime from
10:00 PM to 8:00 PM over thenext 12 days, or organize family
weekend chores, so they'redivided fairly amongst my two
children, ages eight and 10.
Give me tips on how to guidethem to do the chores and not
(10:30):
complain.
Another guideline is keep yourown Inner compass, your own
authority.
You don't have to follow itssuggestions.
Exactly.
Edit, adapt.
You're the expert on your life.
It's a thought partner.
Not a dictator.
You be you.
And lastly, practice reflection.
(10:51):
After using it, pause and ask.
Did that help me feel more calmor more confused?
Use it wisely and AI won'treplace your Inner voice.
It will actually strengthen it.
Here's your Inner Challenge thisweek.
Use chat, GPT or another AI toolto help you with one chore that
feels overwhelming.
(11:12):
Start with a prompt like this.
Give me a three step plan to getstarted on.
And insert whatever it is youwanna do.
Laundry, grocery planning, inboxcleaning, organizing a room.
When you're done reflect, did Ifeel calmer?
What surprised me would I trythis again?
(11:32):
No pressure to master it.
Just try it and observe whathappens.
In this episode, we explored howAI can reduce the mental clutter
that often makes daily choresfeel impossible.
We covered what AI really is, alanguage prediction tool.
The benefits and concerns ofusing AI for mental clarity and
(11:54):
a coping skill, using AI as acalm, structured thought
partner, not a crutch, and mostimportantly, how to use this
tool in a way that supports notreplaces your own Inner voice,
your own Inner wisdom.
Join me on Thursday for afollow-up where we'll dive into
how to use AI as a thoughtpartner for anxious thinking.
(12:18):
Thanks for listening to creatingMidlife Calm.
In this episode, you'll discover one
simple coping skill that canstop the daily overwhelm of
everyday chores.
Built-in Microphone (00:07):
Welcome to Creating Midlife Calm, a podcast
dedicated to empowering midlifeminds to overcome anxiety, stop
feeling like crap and becomemore present with your family,
all while achieving greatersuccess at work.
I'm MJ Murray Vachon, a licensedclinical social worker with over
48, 000 hours of therapysessions and 31 years of
(00:28):
experience teaching mentalwellness.
M.J. Murray Vachon LCSW (00:31):
Welcome to the podcast.
As you head into the end ofsummer, can you feel your
anxiety rising?
This time of year often bringsthe crush of daily chores that
you could more easily ignore inJune and July.
From meal prep to inbox clutter,it all comes rushing back.
Today I wanna introduce you to asurprisingly helpful coping
(00:54):
skill.
Using artificial intelligence,specifically chat, GPT, to ease
the mental weight of everydaytasks.
In this episode, you'll discoverwhat AI really is in simple
human terms.
You won't need to be a tech geekto get something out of this
episode.
(01:14):
You'll also learn how it canhelp reduce mental clutter so
you feel more productive andcalm.
And lastly, we'll end with anInner Challenge designed to help
you regain momentum and calm.
Whether you have used AI forwork or never tried it.
Today's episode will help youunderstand how to use this tool
(01:35):
that's free and can beincredibly helpful when used
wisely.
So let's begin at the beginning.
What is AI really, we hear a lotabout ai.
It's either gonna change theworld for the better or end the
world tomorrow.
AI can feel futuristic andintimidating, but the kind I'm
(01:57):
talking about chat, GPT isactually built to do something
familiar, make sense of languageand information in a way that
makes your life easier.
What chat GPT does is itpredicts the next word or phrase
in a sentence based on patterns.
It has learned from a massiveamount of text that part mirrors
(02:19):
something our own minds do.
Like when we finish someone'ssentence, anticipate a reply or
read between the lines in aconversation.
But chat GPT does somethingmore.
It also organizes and returnsinformation you may not have at
your fingertips, like asupercharged version of Google,
but in a conversational format.
(02:41):
You don't just get links orscattered facts.
You get summaries.
Lists or even step-by-step plansbased on what you asked, that
blend a prediction andinformation retrieval makes it
especially useful when your mindfeels overloaded or unsure where
to start.
Another way to say when you'reavoiding, that's where AI can
(03:04):
really help.
It brings structure to chaos andclarity to spiraling thoughts.
I've come to think of AI as athought partner.
It won't do my thinking for me,but if I give it a clear prompt,
it helps my thinking become morefocused, more actionable, and
less noisy.
But like any thought partner,especially one that's not human,
(03:26):
it's not perfect, and that'sworth remembering.
Let's take a moment to talkabout both the benefits and
concerns of using AI to managemidlife overwhelm.
First, the benefits.
It gives you a place to startwhen you're stuck or when you're
in avoidance mode.
Second, it holds your thoughtswithout judgment, especially
(03:48):
helpful if you have a strongInner critic.
And lastly, it returnsstructured ideas, list reminders
or timelines which helps yourbrain shift from foggy to
focused.
Here's an example of the firsttime I understood the power of
ai.
Last Christmas, I was hostingfamily for eight days.
(04:10):
My daughter-in-law and herfamily are vegan.
My grandson has a serious milkallergy.
My daughter can't eat gluten.
Just thinking about planningmeals to a day for eight days
was so overwhelming.
I shut down the year before.
I spent six hours making a plan,but this time I decided to
(04:33):
experiment with chat GPT sinceit seemed to be all over the
news.
I put in the prompt, can youhelp me create lunch and dinner
menus for seven people overeight days with these three
dietary needs.
In 15 minutes I had a completeoutline with a shopping list.
Did I use everything itsuggested?
(04:55):
No, but I went from dread.
To clarity and that changedeverything.
So let's look at the concerns.
If your question or prompt istoo chaotic, AI can mirror that
and overwhelm you back.
It's only as helpful as theprompt you give, so expect a
short learning curve as youfigure out how to ask it, what
(05:17):
you need it to do for you in aclear, more helpful way.
My last concern is anover-reliance on AI can weaken
your Inner voice if you stopchecking in with yourself.
Let me give you an example.
In the meal planning example, AIsuggested things that were far
too complicated.
A fermented jackfruit stew Imean, really.
(05:40):
I laughed out loud and said,thanks, but no thanks.
Then I remembered AI isn't afriend.
It's a tool, and that's where itgets a bit tricky.
AI is nice.
It's too nice, in my opinion.
It's easy to feel like you'retalking to someone who
understands.
(06:01):
Some people even name their ai.
I don't because it's not aperson, it's a tool.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Because it leans towards thepositive.
It can feel like you're talkingto a person.
And I just wanna say upfront,the last thing any of us need to
do is be on our devices anymorethan we are.
(06:23):
AI isn't really artificialintelligence.
It's Google on steroids, andwhile I never felt the urge to
thank Google, I often feel itwith chat GPT, but I've learned
not to because each responsetakes energy, my emotional and
intellectual energy, as well asearth's energy.
So treating a tool like a personcan be misleading and wasteful.
(06:48):
I have found AI when used wiselyto be helpful, not only in my
personal life, but myprofessional life.
Here's the science.
The average adult makes 35,000decisions a day.
Wow.
That's part of why seeminglysmall chores can leave you
feeling mentally fried, but whenyou use AI wisely, it will help
(07:11):
you reduce that load.
It supports the executivefunctioning part of your brain,
the prefrontal cortex, thesystem responsible for planning,
organizing, and prioritizing.
That's the part that getshijacked when you feel
overwhelmed.
So I want to ask you to considertrying AI to break down one
overwhelming task and see whatyou think.
(07:35):
Think of it as a tech thoughtpartner who helps you take
action.
Not overthink.
You can access the tool forfree@chat.open ai.com.
I'll link this in the shownotes.
You'll have to create a loginand start typing.
It's like talking to a veryorganized assistant.
(07:57):
The key is knowing how to ask itthe right kind of question.
Let me show you how with thesetwo real life examples, one of
my clients who often feelsfrozen by weekend housework,
decided to try chat GPT afterfeeling completely shut down by
the site of laundry piles,unopened mail, and two messy
(08:17):
bathrooms.
She typed in help me divide twohours of weekend cleaning into
manageable chunks with breaks.
Make it fun.
Chat GBT returned a gentlestructured timeline.
20 minutes of sorting laundry,five minute break, 15 minutes
clearing surfaces 10 minute restwith tea.
(08:37):
Final 15 minute cleanup round.
Play, your favorite playlist, orcall a friend.
It even suggested a simplereward at the end.
She told me it helped her movefrom feeling stuck to feeling
like she had a doable plan, andthat changed everything.
Here's another example from thecouch.
Another client with a DHD andanxiety starts her day by asking
(09:02):
Help me plan my day.
I have my best energy from eightto 10 and low energy from noon
to two.
These are the things I need toget done by 2:00 PM chat, GPT
gives her a basic plan.
Including short breaks and evenencourages her gently.
She reports that it helps hermove from panic into a soft,
(09:23):
sustainable action.
When she is done, she goes backinto chat GPT, and tells chat
what worked and what didn't.
That way chat begins tounderstand what works for her in
a more personalized, useful, andactionable way when she enters
her requests the next day.
(09:44):
Which leads me to the obviousquestion.
How do you use chat as a skillwithout losing touch with your
Inner authority?
Here are three guidelines.
Be specific.
Not perfect.
You don't need the right words,just the right direction,
especially if you lean towardsperfectionism.
Don't spend a long time on yourprompt.
(10:07):
Trust yourself, type it in andrevise if needed a prompt such
as help me create a plan toadjust my kids' bedtime from
10:00 PM to 8:00 PM over thenext 12 days, or organize family
weekend chores, so they'redivided fairly amongst my two
children, ages eight and 10.
Give me tips on how to guidethem to do the chores and not
(10:30):
complain.
Another guideline is keep yourown Inner compass, your own
authority.
You don't have to follow itssuggestions.
Exactly.
Edit, adapt.
You're the expert on your life.
It's a thought partner.
Not a dictator.
You be you.
And lastly, practice reflection.
(10:51):
After using it, pause and ask.
Did that help me feel more calmor more confused?
Use it wisely and AI won'treplace your Inner voice.
It will actually strengthen it.
Here's your Inner Challenge thisweek.
Use chat, GPT or another AI toolto help you with one chore that
feels overwhelming.
(11:12):
Start with a prompt like this.
Give me a three step plan to getstarted on.
And insert whatever it is youwanna do.
Laundry, grocery planning, inboxcleaning, organizing a room.
When you're done reflect, did Ifeel calmer?
What surprised me would I trythis again?
(11:32):
No pressure to master it.
Just try it and observe whathappens.
In this episode, we explored howAI can reduce the mental clutter
that often makes daily choresfeel impossible.
We covered what AI really is, alanguage prediction tool.
The benefits and concerns ofusing AI for mental clarity and
(11:54):
a coping skill, using AI as acalm, structured thought
partner, not a crutch, and mostimportantly, how to use this
tool in a way that supports notreplaces your own Inner voice,
your own Inner wisdom.
Join me on Thursday for afollow-up where we'll dive into
how to use AI as a thoughtpartner for anxious thinking.
(12:18):
Thanks for listening to creatingMidlife Calm.
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