Cults to Consciousness

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Rosei Quartz was part of the Seventh Day Adventist church in Canada where her father became a very performative and charismatic Pastor. It never felt authentic to Rosei and things got worse when he started using stories (which were most likely fabricated) about her in his very public sermons. This put an unwelcome target on her back as a chiId that stuck with her throughout her years in the ch...

As a teenager, devoted to her faith, Carrie Saum felt being born a woman was a punishment. Her mother was a strongly devout Christian woman who implored on Carrie that if she didn’t go to Russia on a teen mission trip, Russians would go to Hell and their blood would be on her hands. These teen trips were mostly run by other young adults who put the kids in ill*gal and morally questionable situations. However, nothing was o...

Amy Duggar, cousin to the famous Duggar family from TLC’s “19 Kids and Counting” exposes what life was REALLY like on and off the big screen. Her own childhood was plagued by a narcissistic and cruel father who would constantly take her on a roller coaster of ups and downs. Her grandfather (Jim Bob & her mother’s father) was also a character that parents knew could not be alone with their kids. However, there was even ...

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Amy Duggar, cousin to the famous Duggar family from TLC’s “19 Kids and Counting” exposes what life was REALLY like on and off the big screen. Her own childhood was plagued by a narcissistic and cru*l father who would constantly take her on a roller coaster of ups and downs. Meanwhile, her uncle Jim Bob’s family seemed to have everything together. Perfectly behaved children combined wi...

Thembi Buthelezi came to America from South Africa, becoming very successful in New York City. Her sister back home was deeply involved in a cult there, who told her she could syphon her sister’s life through magic and sacrifice. Thembi’s life started falling apart the minute her sister arrived in her home and she knew something was wrong. Thembi distanced herself from her sister, went to ministerial school and ended up in...

Charlotte Hayes was adopted as a baby to Seventh-Day Adventist parents who used the doctrine to h*rm her in unimaginable ways. She was forced to eat raw vegan, not given adequate nutrients and kept dang*rously thin, while the rest of the family ate normally. On top of that, CSA started happening at age 7 and she was told it was to prepare her for being a wife. Charlotte will further discuss her former mother’s obsessions w...

Charlotte was adopted as a baby to Seventh Day Adventist parents who used the doctrine to harm her in unimaginable ways. More details on her childhood can be found in part one linked below. Finally, at 18 years old, she enlisted a couple friends through Snapchat to help her escape just days before her former father, who made threats on her life for exposing his abuse, returned home. With only a bag of clothes, an erased iP...

CW: CSA, rape.  Charlotte Hayes was adopted as a baby to Seventh-Day Adventist parents who used the doctrine to harm her in unimaginable ways. She was forced to eat raw vegan, not given adequate nutrients and kept dangerously thin, while the rest of the family ate normally. On top of that, CSA started happening at age 7 and she was told it was to prepare her for being a wife. When signs of physical abuse caught the at...

CW: CSA. Jacinta LeGore was born and raised in the Jehovah’s Witnesses. After being forced to confess that she had been CSA’d, then subsequently punished for it, it lead her down a shame spiral. Feeling worthless, she decided to get married at 16 to hopefully heal the part of her that the Elders and her parents thought was “impure”. The marriage ended up being another painful situation which ended in being disfellowshipped...

Alissa Watson comes back to update us with some news of her father. She was a devout Jehovah’s Witness through adulthood, marriage and two children, despite a birthing scare that could’ve taken a dark turn if she ended up needing a blood transfusion. Her husband knew his wife was not allowed to receive blood due to the strict doctrine around it, but he was not willing to lose his wife over it. This sent him down a deeply r...

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CW: CA, mentions of suicide- Jamie Mustard was born into one of the most influential fringe movements in the 1970s: Scientology. Raised on a mythos of spaceships and made to believe that it was his life’s purpose to help save the world, he was determined to survive—not only unsurvivable neglect but also the impossible physical and psychological gauntlet of extreme poverty and illi...

After an amazing discussion with Jenna Miscavige, we knew we had to come back and further discuss what led her out of her Scientology marriage. Even further, we will explore the tactics that set former Scientologists up for failure when it comes to relationships after the cult. A real and raw conversation about the hardships faced when raised in a militaristic, emotionless prison like environment. 

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Jenna Miscavige was born into and grew up in Scientology. Her uncle, David Miscavige, is the leader of Scientology. Jenna details her nearly parentless life as a number in the militaristic conditions where they kept the children. Her mother was a high ranking member, so when she saw how she lived in what felt like royal conditions compared to her, she doubled down in her beliefs with ...

Following our incredible interview with Melissa Duge Spiers, today we go LIVE to confront the question...  Is Seventh-Day Adventism a Cult? 

Melissa grew up in the shadow of control, silence, and secrets inside the insular fundamentalist sect, Seventh-Day Adventist Church. From being beaten for resisting a childhood home perm to seducing a forbidden public school athlete in her parents’ bed to reclaim her autonomy...

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CW: mentions of eating disorders, female GM, CSA, SA.  Melissa Duge Spiers grew up in the shadow of control, silence, and secrets inside the insular fundamentalist sect, Seventh-Day Adventist Church. From being beaten for resisting a childhood home perm to seducing a forbidden public school athlete in her parents’ bed to reclaim her autonomy, Melissa’s early years were shaped by ...

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CW:  CA, DV, Mentions of CSA Material & Suicidal Attempts/Ideation.  Zett Espinoza was born into a professional criminal family in Los Angeles. Her mother struggled with mental illness and that often left the children neglected and afraid. Initiated into gang life around 12 years old, Zett’s father was conditioned for illegal activity. He started an illegal empire and em...

CW: Suicidal ideation, self harm.  Born in the 1970s in Wisconsin, Arno grew up in a turbulent environment with alcohol, fighting, and family dysfunction around him.  As a teenager, he was angry, rebellious, and looking for belonging. That led him toward white power skinhead culture in the late 1980s. He became a founding member of a major U.S. skinhead gang and the lead singer of a hate-metal band that glorified...

CW:  SA, ED, Suicidal Ideation.  Growing up Ultra Orthodox in an extremely abusive home, left Tzivya Murrin completely unprepared for the outside world. She tried to get help multiple times to get away from her parents, but the system failed her. Once she finally got someone on the outside to listen, hands were held out to pull her out of her dangerous situation. However, some of those hands lead her right back i...

CW:  CSA, CA, ED, Suicidal Ideation.  In a system that keeps victims silent in their pain, perpetrators go unchecked and are further emboldened to inflict harm. Tzivya Murrin was trapped in this system. No matter what she did, her parents found reason for extreme punishment. She asked for help multiple times from her community and instead was handed right back to her abusers. Time and time again the system failed...