Season 7 Episode #13 Google Is Free, Babe

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Tired of being the on-call cultural encyclopedia? You're not alone.

Every BIPOC educator knows the feeling—you're minding your business at your child's baseball game, shopping for groceries, or enjoying dinner with your spouse when someone approaches with that look. Suddenly you're fielding questions like "Do you speak African?" or "Is that traditional outfit a costume?" or the ever-popular "Do you celebrate the 4th of July?" Questions that could have been answered with a three-second Google search now demand your emotional labor.

In this raw and refreshingly honest episode, we dive into why these interactions are so exhausting. It's not about shutting down curiosity—it's about the assumption that marginalized people should drop everything to educate others, regardless of time, place, or context. These moments represent unpaid emotional labor that we didn't sign up for, especially when they come from educated professionals who should absolutely know better.

But don't worry—I've got you covered with practical strategies for handling these situations while preserving your dignity and energy. Whether you choose to respond with grace by suggesting resources, establish clear boundaries about what you're willing to discuss, or deploy a bit of well-deserved sarcasm, you have options that put your wellbeing first. Remember: no one has the right to make you the unwilling spokesperson for your entire cultural group.

Ready to build stronger boundaries and navigate these interactions with confidence? Subscribe to the Cultural Curriculum Chat for weekly insights, and check out my blog for deeper dives into topics that matter to BIPOC educators. Leave a review, and I'll give you a personal shout-out in a future episode!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to the Cultural Curriculum Chat.
I'm your host, jeba Edmonds,and today we're diving into one
of the most hilariouslyexhausting parts of being a
BIPOC educator getting asked themost ridiculous questions, you
know, the ones Questions thatcould have easily been answered

(00:21):
with a three-second Googlesearch.
Yep, today's episode is titledGoogle's Free Babe the questions
we hear way too often.
Okay, let's get into this Fromso do you speak African?
To why is it offensive to touchyour hair?
Or do you celebrate the 4th ofJuly?

(00:42):
Or where is Liberia?
Did you live like in huts orsomething?
Or the other one?
What is the point of BlackHistory Month?
The list goes on.
And it's not just students.
These often come from fellowprofessionals who definitely
should know better.
These are highly educatedpeople, or even people walking

(01:03):
on the street.
Having some common sense wouldreally go a long way, and we are
way past the times of well, myintentions were good, were they?
Though?
Would you ask those type ofquestions to your best friend,
let alone to a stranger?
And if they give you that kindof weird, wonky side eye, then

(01:26):
you look at them going.
I'm sorry, was that offensive?
What do you think?
Take a wild guess Now.
Why do you think, my friend,these questions are tiring?
Let's be clear.
Curiosity is not the issue,it's the lack of effort and

(01:51):
context.
It's assuming that people likeme are the spokesperson for all
Black, indigenous and otherpeople of color and, frankly,
it's emotional labor that wedidn't sign up for.
You cannot walk to me andexpect me to give you
experiences that aren't my own.
I would never think aboutasking you to be the
representative of your culturalgroup.

(02:13):
So then, when you're looking tome with that perplexed look on
your face and my reaction, someof you might be like oh well, I
just am curious, I just wantedto know.
And you seem like a trustingperson to want to know.
Well, this trusting person islike you can read.

(02:33):
There's search engines that youcan utilize that will not waste
my time.
It'll be your time that youhave to take to do the work and,
yes, you might be looking at megoing.
Well, jeb, you are aprofessional in this space and
you are an expert in this space.
Yes, I am, but you don't needto ask me at our kids' baseball

(02:55):
tournament if I speak African.
That's not something you needto know and you don't have to
ask me while I am, you know,minding my business at a
wonderful date with my husbandif my African gown that I'm
wearing to our anniversary is acostume?
Nah, you don't need to do that.
You know, there's that oldadage of if you don't have

(03:17):
anything nice to say, don't sayit at all.
Yeah, we need to bring thatback to the forefront because
some people yeah, we need tobring that back to the forefront
Because some people, damn havethe audacity to ask those type
of questions.
And that's why I want to tellyou, think about it in the terms
of people in our marginalizedgroups being constantly

(03:37):
bombarded with these ridiculousquestions.
If you're trying to work,you're trying to read, trying to
, you know, push your kid on theswing at a local park.
We don't need these extraquestions.
These are some things that youmight say.
Oh well, I'm just trying tostrike up a conversation, jen.

(03:58):
Are you really, if you've nevermet me from Adam and you think
this is your moment to shine,come on now Really.
Yeah, I thought so.
So my question to you is okay,I might have stepped in it.
I might have asked that type ofa question.
How do we, as BIPOC individualsand other people of color and

(04:21):
other marginalized groupsrespond, and especially in these
times where things are veryvolatile, how can we use some
grace, but also some sarcasm anda little dignity as well, for
yourself?
Here's some examples of how youcould respond, and let's start
with the grace part.

(04:41):
You know I'm a very faithfulperson, so I always think, okay,
jeb, lead with grace, and it'ssomething that, if I got that
question, I would lead withgrace like this.
That's a great question to lookup.
I recommend and then yourfavorite resource that you can
share with them.
But then if you are in asetting with your family that
you just don't want to bebothered, or even in the

(05:03):
workplace, you could set someboundaries.
I'm not comfortable being youronly resource on this and
sometimes you need to hit themwith some sarcasm.
Ah yeah, because I clearlycarry the cultural encyclopedia
on me at all times.

(05:24):
Whether you lead with grace,some boundaries or some sarcasm,
those little strategies issomething you can use to keep it
moving.
It tells that person youcommunicated back with.
That is not my issue.
That is something for you toinvestigate, that is something

(05:44):
for you to work on and we are inthis collective.
But also it is not my time totake the energy to explain
everything to you.
You are a lifelong learner, myfriend, and so is that person
asking you that ridiculousquestion in the ice cream aisle
yes, I even get that too, thereas well.

(06:06):
I mean, seriously, can't I justget my Ben injuries in pee, I
know right, I tell you.
I can tell you this stuff allday and again.
Sometimes you just want to justsay, ah, google is free, babe,

(06:27):
just look it up.
Just do yourself a favor,because you are just looking
like the biggest fool right now,you know.
And also to be culturally awareof the circumstances and the
places that you are.
No, I'm not going to give youmy life story at my kid's tennis

(06:51):
tournament.
I don't know you like that,cheryl.
I don't know, cheryl, but youknow, just work with me here.
And there's all kinds ofinstances where you want to be
in fellowship with others andthat is wonderful.
But again, when you are at a bigchamber event or a networking

(07:11):
meeting or a conference, you aretrying to break the ice and
think about what questions couldI ask somebody like Jebe?
That will really give me adeeper understanding of that
person.
I really want you to thinkabout icebreakers.
You could even chat GPTicebreakers to ask a person that

(07:37):
is BIPOC or from a differentmarginalized community, that
won't make me look like a donkey, but not like a donkey.
You know what I'm saying, right?
So these are the types ofthings that you have at your
disposal and it's free.
These are some things that willnot make you look crazy if you

(07:58):
do the work first.
And you can give me as manyexcuses as you can.
Trust me, I have heard it all,jeb, but we don't live in such a
diverse area.
But if we did, I know I bet mybottom deli would ask that same
question to somebody else in adiverse environment, in a

(08:20):
diverse community.
It does not excuse yourignorance yeah, I'd said it,
your ignorance, and ignorance isnot always going to be bliss.
You might get a side eye, youmight get cussed out.
Yes, you might get a side eye,you might get cussed out.
I'm just trying to help you,boo.
That's all I'm saying.
I'm just trying to walk youthrough this experience with a

(08:44):
little humor, but also fromheart, from lessons that I
really know you are capable ofdoing.
It doesn't take long to searchthose types of questions.
You might want to say, okay,what is the importance Google of
Black History Month.
You might want to go back andgo.
Is African even a language?

(09:07):
I'll give you that freebie.
No, it's not.
I tell you, if I got a dollarfor every time any of these
ridiculous questions that I saidin the intro came up, honey, it
would be my own Jebba network.
I'm putting it out there in theuniverse.
It will happen.
So, questions or not, you arecapable of looking up those

(09:34):
answers without making yourselflook foolish.
So if you've been asked one toomany times of these particular
questions and you want to buildstronger, healthier boundaries
in your workspaces, I want youto check out my blog post that
goes deeper into this topic.
Also, I want you to sign up forthe Inclusive Educator

(09:56):
Newsletter, where I share weeklytools, templates and occasional
sarcastic memes to keep yougoing, and the links are also in
the show notes in this episode.
If today's episode made youlaugh, sigh or even say, oh,
just same, be sure to subscribe,share and leave a review.

(10:22):
Hey, I'll even do you onebetter.
If you leave that review, Iwill give you a shout out in a
future episode.
Yes, and that will get morereach for more people to find
this podcast.
Thank you so much and I hopeyou enjoyed this episode today.

(10:44):
I'm Jeva Edmonds and I'll catchyou next time on the Cultural
Curriculum Chat.