November 27, 2023 • 46 mins
Dear Daughters of God, Episode 9: A Story of Hope Amidst Tragedy and Unfairness
In this episode, the host Stephanie Eccles, an educator, counselor, school administrator and natural storyteller from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints, shares a heartbreaking story of a tragic event in her school, Excelsior Academy, where two students were victims of a familicide. She recounts her struggle with the darkness of the situation, and a subsequent spiritual experience that restored her faith. The episode underscores the vital importance and healing power of faith, specifically in the Atonement of Savior Jesus Christ. The episode concludes with a beautiful song and a dedication to those affected by the tragedy.
100-year sentence ordered for Utah teen who killed family seeking 'clean slate' | KSL.com
Thanks for listening! I'm on Instagram as deardaughtersofgod. Follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/invites/contact/?i=1iyjqx0cq4kbk&utm_content=qr66nqv
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I am Stephanie Eccles.
This is Dear Daughters of God,Episode 9, engraven upon his
hand.
My name is Stephanie Eccles.
I'm an educator, counselor,school administrator, and
natural storyteller.
From my perspective as a memberof The Church of Jesus Christ of
Latter day Saints, I share avariety of life experiences that
(00:25):
bring us hope and joy in ourSavior, Jesus Christ.
Welcome, dear daughters of God.
I address you that way becausethat's what you are to Him.
To our Heavenly Father, you aredear.
Before we get started, I have adisclaimer.
(00:48):
This episode is for matureaudiences only.
Please keep that in mind.
Now I'll get into the story.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (01:02):
It is an exciting holiday weekend
in January of 2020.
On Monday is Martin Luther KingDay and I'm looking forward to a
little extra sleep this weekendbecause there's no school on
Monday.
And on Saturday, my husband andI, Richard, we have tickets to a
(01:25):
special event.
Our friends Brad and Kelly Allenhave given us tickets to the
Utah Jazz Game.
Um, Brad and his teenage son,Brayden, they were our
ministering brothers.
in episode eight, I explainedwhat ministering sisters were.
Well, ministering brothers arejust like ministering sisters,
(01:46):
but they're the men and youngadult men.
That volunteer their time to actas agents of our savior, Jesus
Christ, and they try to meet thespiritual needs and emotional
needs of the families that areassigned to work with and giving
jazz tickets is far beyond thejob description, but Brad and
(02:09):
Kelly are very generous and theycouldn't use the tickets on this
particular evening and theyoffered the tickets to Richard
and me.
So we were excited to take thembecause the seats, they were in
the lower bowl, right underneaththe basket.
Now for me, It was more of asocial experience and Night out
(02:35):
on the town, but for Richard, itwas all about the sport like it
is for most people that go tothe jazz game when we get there
Saturday, January 18th, we'resitting in these fantastic seats
and I am having a hoot watchingthose audience members that are
(02:56):
season ticket holders that havethese routines that they stand
up and do after every time thejazz make a basket or a foul
shot.
These special routines, likethey do these nods to each
other, these hand motions, veryceremonial.
(03:17):
It's just a blast to watch.
Well, we're having a great time.
And about halfway through thegame, maybe not quite halfway
through, I get a text messagefrom a colleague at work, which
is unusual for about 830 atnight on a Saturday.
So, I do pay attention to thismessage, and the message is so
(03:44):
disturbing, and sad, and awful.
It says...
That there's been this rumorthat's coming to her from a
friend of hers at the hospital,the local hospital in Tooele.
(04:06):
And it has to do with ourschool, Excelsior Academy, and
it's a father of our school hasbeen at the hospital with his
teenage son, and there's been arumor of murders.
(04:28):
And these murders perhapsinclude two students at our
school, Excelsior Academy, aseventh grader and an eighth
grader.
But maybe it's just rumor.
I'm really shocked as I readthis message.
I read it again and againthinking, is this for real?
(04:54):
But she emphasizes Maybe it'sjust rumor.
I mean, we certainly hope it'sjust rumor.
I'm taking it in thinking Whatdoes this mean?
What could this mean?
She mentions their names, butall this is rumor Nothing's for
(05:16):
sure.
I decide I'm not going to say aword about this to Richard.
I'm going to let him enjoy thegame and I'm going to go take a
walk.
I need to move.
This is way too serious to sithere.
So I walk up about.
What feels like 100 stairs outof the basketball stadium area
(05:42):
up to the rotunda of the DeltaCenter up to where the food
court is.
I tell Richard I need to go geta shake and go to the bathroom.
So I'm walking the rotunda areajust trying to get out some of
the anxiety I'm feeling aboutthis news.
(06:02):
I eventually get in line to getthat shake.
Hoping that another message willcome in and say, this was just a
rumor, but no message is comingin.
And I'm thinking, about whothese kids are and their family
(06:25):
and thinking how, how could thisreally?
Really be true.
This can't really be trueEventually, I have got to get
back to that basketball game ormy husband's gonna be wondering
where in the world I am So Imake my way back down to our
(06:46):
seats With a, with a shake andthat's when I get another
message and this message is evenmore hard hitting.
It is a confirmation that thisbad news is true.
(07:12):
There's been a familicide andtwo of our students from
Excelsior Academy.
A teenage boy who attends thelocal high school, not our
school, has killed three of hissiblings and his mother and
(07:35):
attempted to kill his father,but his father fought for his
life and they both ended up atthe hospital.
then more messages start comingthrough, and now it's starting
to get out to the public.
As it turns out, we laterunderstand that this occurred
(07:59):
the night before.
But the police investigationkept it quiet, and now it's
getting out to the public.
my colleague is saying, it wouldbe best if we didn't.
If you give us a publicstatement from Excelsior, even
(08:20):
though we can't release the nameof these students, they haven't
been publicly released.
The community now in TooeleCounty, they know that there's
been this tragedy of homilicide.
And they know that they'restudents from Excelsior.
(08:43):
Can you send me A statement.
So I begin writing a statement
I'm surrounded by noise in thisbasketball stadium, by the
cheers of the fans, by theirstomping feet, by the bouncing
(09:06):
of the basketball, by the sirenof that horn that keeps going
off.
I think I've got to drown outthis noise and bring my focus
in.
just think about the hearts ofthe families of our community as
(09:35):
I'm struggling with the realitythat this crime really did
occur.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Microp (09:51):
I say, the Excelsior family is
saddened to hear of the horribleevent in Grantsville.
We share in the sorrow offamily, friends, and community
members of those affected bythis heartbreaking loss of life.
(10:13):
We ask that the Excelsior familypull together to help one
another with the shock and painof this tragedy.
May our love surround you.
In the meantime, the jazz gameis going on and Richard has no
idea any of this is happening.
(10:36):
When the game ends and we'rewalking out, I begin to tell
him, Richard.
What's Unfolded.
The next day it's all over theinternet.
As it turns out, there was onesibling, the oldest sibling,
(10:58):
that was not home when thetragedy occurred.
He was away at college, atBrigham Young University.
We had known him at a, previousschool and I had never made that
connection.
I had known him maybe ten yearsearlier.
The two students whose liveswere taken were new to
(11:21):
Excelsior.
Their names were Matthew andMilan Haney.
They had enrolled in Excelsiorin August of 2019.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (11:33):
So I didn't know them well, but I
did know what kind of studentsthey were, gentle, accepting,
inviting, warm and friendly toall the students around them.
(11:54):
On Monday afternoon, there was agathering at the Tooele School
District.
Stephanie test (12:00):
Many agencies were involved.
The Utah State Board ofEducation had representatives
there.
The police department, socialservices,
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micr (12:10):
and
Stephanie test (12:10):
Excelsior Academy
Microphone (Samson Q2U Mic (12:13):
Tula School District, who hosted the
meeting, had two students thatwere involved in this tragedy.
First, the perpetrator, 16 yearC.
J.
Haney, and his sister, anothervictim, Alexis Haney, 15 years
(12:35):
old, In this meeting, we talkedabout the plan for the week.
We knew that we would be thefocal point of news media from
across.
The nation and that reportershad the responsibility to
produce a story that ourresponsibility as administrators
(12:58):
of education was to protect theprivacy of our students to keep
school in session to keep ourstudents safe and to continue
learning as usual, as best aspossible.
It was a humbling experience tosee how many volunteers were
(13:19):
willing to come and help ourstudents and teachers process
this overwhelming situation.
(13:42):
We had counselors that weregoing to come from Valley
Behavioral Health and theOdyssey House, and give their
time to meet with our students.
and our teachers to counsel withthem.
I wrote a letter to my teachersthat they received
Stephanie test (14:03):
On Monday,
Microphone (Samson Q2U M (14:04):
Martin Luther King Day,
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (14:05):
so they would know It would be very
likely that they'd be approachedby members of the media.
they need to know what to do.
And that was to refer thosemembers of the media to me.
Stephanie test (14:19):
We would have one representative that would
speak to this story.
that was for the safety of ourstudents and everyone involved
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (14:30):
at the advice of the Utah State
Board of Education.
Stephanie test (14:39):
Tuesday morning came.
We had pictures of Matthew andMilan Haney.
In the front foyer, thevolunteer counselors from
Odyssey House and ValleyBehavioral Health.
I came to the school and I hadarranged for offices to be
(15:01):
available for them.
News media members were all overTooele Valley, in trucks, in
helicopters, and walking byfoot.
They were making phone calls tothe school.
Gratefully, they were not tryingto get in the school.
(15:25):
We started just as we told theparents we would.
In the first period class.
Over the PA, I welcome thestudents back to school, and we
started with a moment ofsilence.
In memory of Matthew and MilanHaney.
(15:56):
After the moment of silence,then we went into a calming
breath exercise.
As we had gentle music playing,then we invited our students, if
they wished, to share a happymemory within their first period
classes.
(16:17):
Later in their English LanguageArts classes, they'd have an
opportunity to write a goodbyeto Matthew Milan.
at the end of that week, we gavethose goodbye letters to the
father of Matthew Milan, ColinHaney.
The counselors began to seestudents and staff members.
(16:39):
I took an interview with themedia.
Of course, I did not speak aboutMatthew and Milan, but rather
the effect that this situationhad on our school.
S Later in the day, I was in myoffice.
(17:02):
My office was free for thisshort time period, and I thought
I could get a little work done,just catch up with the regular
type of educational work.
Up to this point, I had feltsuch gratitude for my knowledge
of the gospel of Jesus Christ,for my understanding that life
(17:26):
did not end with the death.
of these people whose lives weretaken, but that there was life
after death, that there waseternal life, that they again,
(17:47):
that they could return and livewith their Heavenly Father and
Heavenly Mother again, eventhough their lives were taken
prematurely, that there was.
The plan of salvation, eternalfamilies, and that this family
(18:09):
could be together again forever.
And that's what I had held on tofrom that moment in the Delta
Center was how blessed I feltthat I knew that.
(18:34):
And now that I was in my office,I thought that perhaps now we
were past the hardest part as aschool, that now we'd start the
healing.
But at this moment, in myoffice, a clear picture of Mrs.
(19:02):
Haney came into my mind.
I could see her in the mainoffice of the Excelsior Middle
School.
She had visited there on FridayI was passing through that
office on my way to walk to theelementary school and she was
(19:29):
looking very distressed and itwasn't like her to look
distressed.
The office had many people in itand I remember her face and at
this point as I'm in my officeHer face, her very distressed
(19:54):
face, is overwhelming my mind,and a darkness came over me, and
I felt physically weak.
(20:17):
I was not yet at my desk whenthis occurred.
And I backed up towards my deskto grasp my desk for support.
And I felt such sadness anddarkness, like there was no
(20:52):
hope, that nothing could bedone.
Nothing could make this horribleinjustice right.
(21:17):
Nothing could redeem thishorrible injustice that was done
to her and to these children.
Like all was lost.
At this point.
(21:45):
I prayed with urgency to myHeavenly Father.
Please, Father, help me.
There is no hope.
(22:05):
There is no light.
There is only darkness.
Please help me, Father.
At this point, words came in mymind.
(22:27):
They were, go, go to the officeof your colleague two doors down
and talk to that counselor.
(22:48):
I didn't know that counselor.
I had never met that counselorexcept only that morning and
welcomed her into that office.
But I braced myself and stoodand prayed for the strength and
(23:15):
walked to the office two doorsdown and she was free I said,
Hello She said, Hello, come in,please I explained to her Not
(23:38):
knowing anything about herhistory, her faith, I explained
that what I once felt, which wasthat I, over the weekend, felt
(23:59):
blessed to understand that therewas life after death.
And that this family could bereunited and have eternal life.
That now All my hope was gone.
(24:20):
And that darkness had overcomeme.
There was no hope that couldredeem this horrible injustice.
It was too heinous a crime.
And she said, I see, I see.
(24:46):
I share your faith.
May I share a story with you?
I said yes.
Yes.
And she shared her story abouther son who suffered from mental
(25:07):
illness.
And it was a story of greatunfairness.
She didn't know how she couldlive with it, considering his
circumstance and how life turnedout for him.
(25:32):
Because in the end...
And how life was, it was just soterribly unfair.
And then she said, Then I was in, I was in a
Sunday school class, and it wasbrought to my attention, a
(25:58):
lesson on atonement.
And a certain statement wasshared that was in the book,
Preach My Gospel.
She said, it was this statement,she brought it out.
(26:19):
She shared it with me.
quote, as we rely on theatonement of Jesus Christ.
He can help us endure ourtrials, sicknesses, and pain.
(26:42):
We can be filled with joy,peace, and consolation.
All that is unfair about lifecan be made right through the
Atonement.
of Jesus Christ, unquote.
(27:08):
she said, I understood that ourSavior Jesus Christ had paid for
my sins, but I did notunderstand that He could make
right all the unfairness.
(27:31):
And here it says.
That all that is unfair aboutlife can be made right through
the atonement of Jesus Christ.
And when she said that, I knewthose words they were for me,
(27:51):
that the Lord had answered myprayer.
an
once again, I felt peace and light.
I was reminded one more time,that if I will humble myself and
(28:15):
reach out.
In humility, and ask in faith,that he will show me the way,
and indeed, he did, Osiris.
(28:38):
This spiritual experiencebrought to my mind a scripture
found in the Book of Mormon, inthe Book of Mosiah, chapter 4,
verse 9.
It says this, quote, Believe inGod, believe that he is, and
(28:59):
that he created all things, bothin heaven and in earth.
Believe that he has all wisdomand all power, both in heaven
and in earth.
Believe that man doth notcomprehend all the things which
the Lord can comprehend.
(29:21):
Unquote.
It's the portion aboutcomprehension.
I was just reminded that I justsimply can't comprehend.
All these things, how they canbe worked out.
But I do understand faith.
(29:42):
and I do know that all theunfairness in this world can be
made up for through theAtonement of our Savior Jesus
Christ.
Elder Dale G.
Renlund.
of the Quorum of the TwelveApostles gives a sermonette
called Infuriating Unfairness.
(30:04):
This is in the year 2021.
Quote, Some unfairness cannot beexplained.
Inexplicable unfairness isinfuriating.
Unfairness comes from livingwith bodies that are imperfect,
(30:26):
injured, or diseased.
Mortal life is inherentlyunfair.
Some people are born inaffluence.
Others are not.
Some have loving parents.
Others do not.
Some live many years.
(30:47):
Others few.
And on and on.
Some individuals make injuriousmistakes even when they are
trying to do good.
Some choose not to alleviateunfairness when they could.
Distressingly, Some individualsuse their God given agency to
(31:10):
hurt others when they nevershould.
Different types of unfairnesscan merge, creating a tsunami of
overwhelming unfairness.
Unquote.
He goes on to say, quote, Myheart for those who face such
(31:32):
unfairness, but I declare withall my aching heart that Jesus
Christ both understandsunfairness and has the power to
provide a remedy.
Nothing compares to theunfairness he endured.
It was not fair that heexperienced all the pains and
(31:53):
afflictions of mankind.
It was not fair that he sufferedfor my sins and mistakes and for
yours, but he chose to do sobecause of his love for us.
Scripture records that ancientIsraelites complained that God
was treating them unfairly.
(32:15):
In response, Jehovah asked, Forcan a woman forget her sucking
child, that she should not havecompassion on the son of her
womb?
As unlikely as it is that aloving mother would forget her
infant child, Jehovah declaredthat his devotion was even more
(32:37):
steadfast.
He affirmed, Yea, they mayforget, yet will I not forget
thee.
Behold, I have graven thee uponthe palms of my hands.
Thy walls are continually beforeme.
Because Jesus Christ endured theinfinite atoning sacrifice, He
(33:01):
emphasizes perfectly with us.
He is always aware of us and ourcircumstances.
Unquote.
We're reminded that our Saviorwill never forget us.
That he has engraven us on thepalm of his hands.
(33:29):
That he empathizes with usperfectly.
He understands us.
He suffered our pains, all ofthe unfairness.
I do this lovely woman's thecounselor, the one that shared
(33:58):
this experience with me and gaveme the answer to my prayer.
I never saw her again after thatday, but I will always remember.
This heavenly experience, thisreawakening of the spirit and
(34:20):
the lesson about the Atonementof my Savior Jesus Christ that I
was given that day.
The funeral for the Haneys washeld that Friday.
(34:41):
That included the motherConsuela Alejandra Haney, Alexis
Haney, Matthew Haney, and MilanHaney, her three children.
The father, Colin Haney, who didfight for his life and won that
(35:03):
fight, he spoke at the funeralon the atonement of our Savior
Jesus Christ.
I was so touched.
By his faith, and his courage,at such a vulnerable time in his
life.
(35:28):
At the time of this crime, I didwonder, what was C.
J.
's motivation, the reason forthis crime?
Why did this happen?
Not too long after this horriblecrime.
(35:52):
The world was turned about withthe Corona virus and this new
story was swept, rightunderneath the rug.
It wasn't until July of 2023that the sentencing occurred.
(36:19):
On July 12th, KSL.
com published the results of thesentencing.
This is the title of thearticle.
100 year sentence ordered for Utah teen
who killed family seeking cleanslate.
(36:40):
a Grantsville man who was 16when he shot and killed his
mother and three of his siblingsin their home, planned to kill
his whole family and burn hishouse down to get a clean slate
and a new opportunity in life,
Unquote.
(37:04):
I will link this article in theshow notes.
But I've realized, as I've toldthis story.
That the story I was supposed totell today was about the
(37:26):
Atonement of our Savior, JesusChrist.
This situation is one of those infuriatingly It
is too hard to fully grasp andunderstand.
(37:51):
Elder Renlund, who wrote thesermonette that I referred to
earlier, called Infuriatingunfairness.
He says this near the ending ofthat sermonette, quote, in
(38:12):
unfair situations, one of ourtasks is to trust that all that
is unfair about life can be maderight.
Through the Atonement of JesusChrist.
Jesus Christ overcame the worldand absorbed all unfairness.
(38:40):
Because of Him, we can havepeace in this world and be of
good cheer.
If we let Him, Jesus Christ,We'll consecrate the unfairness
for our gain.
He will not just console us andrestore what was lost.
(39:05):
He will use the unfairness forour benefit.
When it comes to how and when,we need to recognize and accept,
as did Alma, that it matterethnot.
for God knoweth all these thingsand it sufficeth me to know that
this is the case.
(39:28):
We can try to hold our questionsabout how and when for later and
focus on developing faith inJesus Christ.
that He has both the power tomake everything right and yearns
(39:48):
to do so.
Unquote.
I would like to dedicate thisepisode to the eternal family of
Alex Colin Haney and ConsuelaAlejandra Haney.
(40:09):
May they feel the love of Godsurround them.
I want to thank the counselorsthat volunteered at Excelsior
Academy during this tragedy thatbuoyed us up at a most desperate
time.
And to thank my Heavenly Fatherfor the plan of salvation, and
(40:35):
for my Savior, Jesus Christ.
For atoning for our sins andyearning to make up for all the
unfairness that occurs in thislife.
In episode five, we heard thestory of Nancy DeMello.
(41:00):
She is a music teacher and aprofessional vocalist.
I encourage you to go back andlisten to episode five if you
haven't heard that inspiringstory.
At the end of that episode, wewere able to hear one of the
pieces from her album calledNancy DeMello and Friends.
today we get to hear another oneof those pieces from her friends
(41:25):
within that album.
the name of this piece is Thereis Hope.
It is produced by Steve Lurid,and the vocal artist is Rebecca
Lopez Penelillo.
(41:46):
This is a beautiful piece to endour story on the atonement of
our Savior, Jesus Christ.
Will you help me spread the goodword about this podcast by
subscribing to it, rating it,and best of all, sharing it with
(42:08):
two to three members of yourfamily and friends?
Thank you for joining me today.
For now, I will say farewell.
I am Stephanie Eccles.
This is Dear Daughters of God,Episode 9, engraven upon his
hand.
My name is Stephanie Eccles.
I'm an educator, counselor,school administrator, and
natural storyteller.
From my perspective as a memberof The Church of Jesus Christ of
Latter day Saints, I share avariety of life experiences that
(00:25):
bring us hope and joy in ourSavior, Jesus Christ.
Welcome, dear daughters of God.
I address you that way becausethat's what you are to Him.
To our Heavenly Father, you aredear.
Before we get started, I have adisclaimer.
(00:48):
This episode is for matureaudiences only.
Please keep that in mind.
Now I'll get into the story.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (01:02):
It is an exciting holiday weekend
in January of 2020.
On Monday is Martin Luther KingDay and I'm looking forward to a
little extra sleep this weekendbecause there's no school on
Monday.
And on Saturday, my husband andI, Richard, we have tickets to a
(01:25):
special event.
Our friends Brad and Kelly Allenhave given us tickets to the
Utah Jazz Game.
Um, Brad and his teenage son,Brayden, they were our
ministering brothers.
in episode eight, I explainedwhat ministering sisters were.
Well, ministering brothers arejust like ministering sisters,
(01:46):
but they're the men and youngadult men.
That volunteer their time to actas agents of our savior, Jesus
Christ, and they try to meet thespiritual needs and emotional
needs of the families that areassigned to work with and giving
jazz tickets is far beyond thejob description, but Brad and
(02:09):
Kelly are very generous and theycouldn't use the tickets on this
particular evening and theyoffered the tickets to Richard
and me.
So we were excited to take thembecause the seats, they were in
the lower bowl, right underneaththe basket.
Now for me, It was more of asocial experience and Night out
(02:35):
on the town, but for Richard, itwas all about the sport like it
is for most people that go tothe jazz game when we get there
Saturday, January 18th, we'resitting in these fantastic seats
and I am having a hoot watchingthose audience members that are
(02:56):
season ticket holders that havethese routines that they stand
up and do after every time thejazz make a basket or a foul
shot.
These special routines, likethey do these nods to each
other, these hand motions, veryceremonial.
(03:17):
It's just a blast to watch.
Well, we're having a great time.
And about halfway through thegame, maybe not quite halfway
through, I get a text messagefrom a colleague at work, which
is unusual for about 830 atnight on a Saturday.
So, I do pay attention to thismessage, and the message is so
(03:44):
disturbing, and sad, and awful.
It says...
That there's been this rumorthat's coming to her from a
friend of hers at the hospital,the local hospital in Tooele.
(04:06):
And it has to do with ourschool, Excelsior Academy, and
it's a father of our school hasbeen at the hospital with his
teenage son, and there's been arumor of murders.
(04:28):
And these murders perhapsinclude two students at our
school, Excelsior Academy, aseventh grader and an eighth
grader.
But maybe it's just rumor.
I'm really shocked as I readthis message.
I read it again and againthinking, is this for real?
(04:54):
But she emphasizes Maybe it'sjust rumor.
I mean, we certainly hope it'sjust rumor.
I'm taking it in thinking Whatdoes this mean?
What could this mean?
She mentions their names, butall this is rumor Nothing's for
(05:16):
sure.
I decide I'm not going to say aword about this to Richard.
I'm going to let him enjoy thegame and I'm going to go take a
walk.
I need to move.
This is way too serious to sithere.
So I walk up about.
What feels like 100 stairs outof the basketball stadium area
(05:42):
up to the rotunda of the DeltaCenter up to where the food
court is.
I tell Richard I need to go geta shake and go to the bathroom.
So I'm walking the rotunda areajust trying to get out some of
the anxiety I'm feeling aboutthis news.
(06:02):
I eventually get in line to getthat shake.
Hoping that another message willcome in and say, this was just a
rumor, but no message is comingin.
And I'm thinking, about whothese kids are and their family
(06:25):
and thinking how, how could thisreally?
Really be true.
This can't really be trueEventually, I have got to get
back to that basketball game ormy husband's gonna be wondering
where in the world I am So Imake my way back down to our
(06:46):
seats With a, with a shake andthat's when I get another
message and this message is evenmore hard hitting.
It is a confirmation that thisbad news is true.
(07:12):
There's been a familicide andtwo of our students from
Excelsior Academy.
A teenage boy who attends thelocal high school, not our
school, has killed three of hissiblings and his mother and
(07:35):
attempted to kill his father,but his father fought for his
life and they both ended up atthe hospital.
then more messages start comingthrough, and now it's starting
to get out to the public.
As it turns out, we laterunderstand that this occurred
(07:59):
the night before.
But the police investigationkept it quiet, and now it's
getting out to the public.
my colleague is saying, it wouldbe best if we didn't.
If you give us a publicstatement from Excelsior, even
(08:20):
though we can't release the nameof these students, they haven't
been publicly released.
The community now in TooeleCounty, they know that there's
been this tragedy of homilicide.
And they know that they'restudents from Excelsior.
(08:43):
Can you send me A statement.
So I begin writing a statement
I'm surrounded by noise in thisbasketball stadium, by the
cheers of the fans, by theirstomping feet, by the bouncing
(09:06):
of the basketball, by the sirenof that horn that keeps going
off.
I think I've got to drown outthis noise and bring my focus
in.
just think about the hearts ofthe families of our community as
(09:35):
I'm struggling with the realitythat this crime really did
occur.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Microp (09:51):
I say, the Excelsior family is
saddened to hear of the horribleevent in Grantsville.
We share in the sorrow offamily, friends, and community
members of those affected bythis heartbreaking loss of life.
(10:13):
We ask that the Excelsior familypull together to help one
another with the shock and painof this tragedy.
May our love surround you.
In the meantime, the jazz gameis going on and Richard has no
idea any of this is happening.
(10:36):
When the game ends and we'rewalking out, I begin to tell
him, Richard.
What's Unfolded.
The next day it's all over theinternet.
As it turns out, there was onesibling, the oldest sibling,
(10:58):
that was not home when thetragedy occurred.
He was away at college, atBrigham Young University.
We had known him at a, previousschool and I had never made that
connection.
I had known him maybe ten yearsearlier.
The two students whose liveswere taken were new to
(11:21):
Excelsior.
Their names were Matthew andMilan Haney.
They had enrolled in Excelsiorin August of 2019.
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (11:33):
So I didn't know them well, but I
did know what kind of studentsthey were, gentle, accepting,
inviting, warm and friendly toall the students around them.
(11:54):
On Monday afternoon, there was agathering at the Tooele School
District.
Stephanie test (12:00):
Many agencies were involved.
The Utah State Board ofEducation had representatives
there.
The police department, socialservices,
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micr (12:10):
and
Stephanie test (12:10):
Excelsior Academy
Microphone (Samson Q2U Mic (12:13):
Tula School District, who hosted the
meeting, had two students thatwere involved in this tragedy.
First, the perpetrator, 16 yearC.
J.
Haney, and his sister, anothervictim, Alexis Haney, 15 years
(12:35):
old, In this meeting, we talkedabout the plan for the week.
We knew that we would be thefocal point of news media from
across.
The nation and that reportershad the responsibility to
produce a story that ourresponsibility as administrators
(12:58):
of education was to protect theprivacy of our students to keep
school in session to keep ourstudents safe and to continue
learning as usual, as best aspossible.
It was a humbling experience tosee how many volunteers were
(13:19):
willing to come and help ourstudents and teachers process
this overwhelming situation.
(13:42):
We had counselors that weregoing to come from Valley
Behavioral Health and theOdyssey House, and give their
time to meet with our students.
and our teachers to counsel withthem.
I wrote a letter to my teachersthat they received
Stephanie test (14:03):
On Monday,
Microphone (Samson Q2U M (14:04):
Martin Luther King Day,
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (14:05):
so they would know It would be very
likely that they'd be approachedby members of the media.
they need to know what to do.
And that was to refer thosemembers of the media to me.
Stephanie test (14:19):
We would have one representative that would
speak to this story.
that was for the safety of ourstudents and everyone involved
Microphone (Samson Q2U Micro (14:30):
at the advice of the Utah State
Board of Education.
Stephanie test (14:39):
Tuesday morning came.
We had pictures of Matthew andMilan Haney.
In the front foyer, thevolunteer counselors from
Odyssey House and ValleyBehavioral Health.
I came to the school and I hadarranged for offices to be
(15:01):
available for them.
News media members were all overTooele Valley, in trucks, in
helicopters, and walking byfoot.
They were making phone calls tothe school.
Gratefully, they were not tryingto get in the school.
(15:25):
We started just as we told theparents we would.
In the first period class.
Over the PA, I welcome thestudents back to school, and we
started with a moment ofsilence.
In memory of Matthew and MilanHaney.
(15:56):
After the moment of silence,then we went into a calming
breath exercise.
As we had gentle music playing,then we invited our students, if
they wished, to share a happymemory within their first period
classes.
(16:17):
Later in their English LanguageArts classes, they'd have an
opportunity to write a goodbyeto Matthew Milan.
at the end of that week, we gavethose goodbye letters to the
father of Matthew Milan, ColinHaney.
The counselors began to seestudents and staff members.
(16:39):
I took an interview with themedia.
Of course, I did not speak aboutMatthew and Milan, but rather
the effect that this situationhad on our school.
S Later in the day, I was in myoffice.
(17:02):
My office was free for thisshort time period, and I thought
I could get a little work done,just catch up with the regular
type of educational work.
Up to this point, I had feltsuch gratitude for my knowledge
of the gospel of Jesus Christ,for my understanding that life
(17:26):
did not end with the death.
of these people whose lives weretaken, but that there was life
after death, that there waseternal life, that they again,
(17:47):
that they could return and livewith their Heavenly Father and
Heavenly Mother again, eventhough their lives were taken
prematurely, that there was.
The plan of salvation, eternalfamilies, and that this family
(18:09):
could be together again forever.
And that's what I had held on tofrom that moment in the Delta
Center was how blessed I feltthat I knew that.
(18:34):
And now that I was in my office,I thought that perhaps now we
were past the hardest part as aschool, that now we'd start the
healing.
But at this moment, in myoffice, a clear picture of Mrs.
(19:02):
Haney came into my mind.
I could see her in the mainoffice of the Excelsior Middle
School.
She had visited there on FridayI was passing through that
office on my way to walk to theelementary school and she was
(19:29):
looking very distressed and itwasn't like her to look
distressed.
The office had many people in itand I remember her face and at
this point as I'm in my officeHer face, her very distressed
(19:54):
face, is overwhelming my mind,and a darkness came over me, and
I felt physically weak.
(20:17):
I was not yet at my desk whenthis occurred.
And I backed up towards my deskto grasp my desk for support.
And I felt such sadness anddarkness, like there was no
(20:52):
hope, that nothing could bedone.
Nothing could make this horribleinjustice right.
(21:17):
Nothing could redeem thishorrible injustice that was done
to her and to these children.
Like all was lost.
At this point.
(21:45):
I prayed with urgency to myHeavenly Father.
Please, Father, help me.
There is no hope.
(22:05):
There is no light.
There is only darkness.
Please help me, Father.
At this point, words came in mymind.
(22:27):
They were, go, go to the officeof your colleague two doors down
and talk to that counselor.
(22:48):
I didn't know that counselor.
I had never met that counselorexcept only that morning and
welcomed her into that office.
But I braced myself and stoodand prayed for the strength and
(23:15):
walked to the office two doorsdown and she was free I said,
Hello She said, Hello, come in,please I explained to her Not
(23:38):
knowing anything about herhistory, her faith, I explained
that what I once felt, which wasthat I, over the weekend, felt
(23:59):
blessed to understand that therewas life after death.
And that this family could bereunited and have eternal life.
That now All my hope was gone.
(24:20):
And that darkness had overcomeme.
There was no hope that couldredeem this horrible injustice.
It was too heinous a crime.
And she said, I see, I see.
(24:46):
I share your faith.
May I share a story with you?
I said yes.
Yes.
And she shared her story abouther son who suffered from mental
(25:07):
illness.
And it was a story of greatunfairness.
She didn't know how she couldlive with it, considering his
circumstance and how life turnedout for him.
(25:32):
Because in the end...
And how life was, it was just soterribly unfair.
And then she said, Then I was in, I was in a
Sunday school class, and it wasbrought to my attention, a
(25:58):
lesson on atonement.
And a certain statement wasshared that was in the book,
Preach My Gospel.
She said, it was this statement,she brought it out.
(26:19):
She shared it with me.
quote, as we rely on theatonement of Jesus Christ.
He can help us endure ourtrials, sicknesses, and pain.
(26:42):
We can be filled with joy,peace, and consolation.
All that is unfair about lifecan be made right through the
Atonement.
of Jesus Christ, unquote.
(27:08):
she said, I understood that ourSavior Jesus Christ had paid for
my sins, but I did notunderstand that He could make
right all the unfairness.
(27:31):
And here it says.
That all that is unfair aboutlife can be made right through
the atonement of Jesus Christ.
And when she said that, I knewthose words they were for me,
(27:51):
that the Lord had answered myprayer.
an
once again, I felt peace and light.
I was reminded one more time,that if I will humble myself and
(28:15):
reach out.
In humility, and ask in faith,that he will show me the way,
and indeed, he did, Osiris.
(28:38):
This spiritual experiencebrought to my mind a scripture
found in the Book of Mormon, inthe Book of Mosiah, chapter 4,
verse 9.
It says this, quote, Believe inGod, believe that he is, and
(28:59):
that he created all things, bothin heaven and in earth.
Believe that he has all wisdomand all power, both in heaven
and in earth.
Believe that man doth notcomprehend all the things which
the Lord can comprehend.
(29:21):
Unquote.
It's the portion aboutcomprehension.
I was just reminded that I justsimply can't comprehend.
All these things, how they canbe worked out.
But I do understand faith.
(29:42):
and I do know that all theunfairness in this world can be
made up for through theAtonement of our Savior Jesus
Christ.
Elder Dale G.
Renlund.
of the Quorum of the TwelveApostles gives a sermonette
called Infuriating Unfairness.
(30:04):
This is in the year 2021.
Quote, Some unfairness cannot beexplained.
Inexplicable unfairness isinfuriating.
Unfairness comes from livingwith bodies that are imperfect,
(30:26):
injured, or diseased.
Mortal life is inherentlyunfair.
Some people are born inaffluence.
Others are not.
Some have loving parents.
Others do not.
Some live many years.
(30:47):
Others few.
And on and on.
Some individuals make injuriousmistakes even when they are
trying to do good.
Some choose not to alleviateunfairness when they could.
Distressingly, Some individualsuse their God given agency to
(31:10):
hurt others when they nevershould.
Different types of unfairnesscan merge, creating a tsunami of
overwhelming unfairness.
Unquote.
He goes on to say, quote, Myheart for those who face such
(31:32):
unfairness, but I declare withall my aching heart that Jesus
Christ both understandsunfairness and has the power to
provide a remedy.
Nothing compares to theunfairness he endured.
It was not fair that heexperienced all the pains and
(31:53):
afflictions of mankind.
It was not fair that he sufferedfor my sins and mistakes and for
yours, but he chose to do sobecause of his love for us.
Scripture records that ancientIsraelites complained that God
was treating them unfairly.
(32:15):
In response, Jehovah asked, Forcan a woman forget her sucking
child, that she should not havecompassion on the son of her
womb?
As unlikely as it is that aloving mother would forget her
infant child, Jehovah declaredthat his devotion was even more
(32:37):
steadfast.
He affirmed, Yea, they mayforget, yet will I not forget
thee.
Behold, I have graven thee uponthe palms of my hands.
Thy walls are continually beforeme.
Because Jesus Christ endured theinfinite atoning sacrifice, He
(33:01):
emphasizes perfectly with us.
He is always aware of us and ourcircumstances.
Unquote.
We're reminded that our Saviorwill never forget us.
That he has engraven us on thepalm of his hands.
(33:29):
That he empathizes with usperfectly.
He understands us.
He suffered our pains, all ofthe unfairness.
I do this lovely woman's thecounselor, the one that shared
(33:58):
this experience with me and gaveme the answer to my prayer.
I never saw her again after thatday, but I will always remember.
This heavenly experience, thisreawakening of the spirit and
(34:20):
the lesson about the Atonementof my Savior Jesus Christ that I
was given that day.
The funeral for the Haneys washeld that Friday.
(34:41):
That included the motherConsuela Alejandra Haney, Alexis
Haney, Matthew Haney, and MilanHaney, her three children.
The father, Colin Haney, who didfight for his life and won that
(35:03):
fight, he spoke at the funeralon the atonement of our Savior
Jesus Christ.
I was so touched.
By his faith, and his courage,at such a vulnerable time in his
life.
(35:28):
At the time of this crime, I didwonder, what was C.
J.
's motivation, the reason forthis crime?
Why did this happen?
Not too long after this horriblecrime.
(35:52):
The world was turned about withthe Corona virus and this new
story was swept, rightunderneath the rug.
It wasn't until July of 2023that the sentencing occurred.
(36:19):
On July 12th, KSL.
com published the results of thesentencing.
This is the title of thearticle.
100 year sentence ordered for Utah teen
who killed family seeking cleanslate.
(36:40):
a Grantsville man who was 16when he shot and killed his
mother and three of his siblingsin their home, planned to kill
his whole family and burn hishouse down to get a clean slate
and a new opportunity in life,
Unquote.
(37:04):
I will link this article in theshow notes.
But I've realized, as I've toldthis story.
That the story I was supposed totell today was about the
(37:26):
Atonement of our Savior, JesusChrist.
This situation is one of those infuriatingly It
is too hard to fully grasp andunderstand.
(37:51):
Elder Renlund, who wrote thesermonette that I referred to
earlier, called Infuriatingunfairness.
He says this near the ending ofthat sermonette, quote, in
(38:12):
unfair situations, one of ourtasks is to trust that all that
is unfair about life can be maderight.
Through the Atonement of JesusChrist.
Jesus Christ overcame the worldand absorbed all unfairness.
(38:40):
Because of Him, we can havepeace in this world and be of
good cheer.
If we let Him, Jesus Christ,We'll consecrate the unfairness
for our gain.
He will not just console us andrestore what was lost.
(39:05):
He will use the unfairness forour benefit.
When it comes to how and when,we need to recognize and accept,
as did Alma, that it matterethnot.
for God knoweth all these thingsand it sufficeth me to know that
this is the case.
(39:28):
We can try to hold our questionsabout how and when for later and
focus on developing faith inJesus Christ.
that He has both the power tomake everything right and yearns
(39:48):
to do so.
Unquote.
I would like to dedicate thisepisode to the eternal family of
Alex Colin Haney and ConsuelaAlejandra Haney.
(40:09):
May they feel the love of Godsurround them.
I want to thank the counselorsthat volunteered at Excelsior
Academy during this tragedy thatbuoyed us up at a most desperate
time.
And to thank my Heavenly Fatherfor the plan of salvation, and
(40:35):
for my Savior, Jesus Christ.
For atoning for our sins andyearning to make up for all the
unfairness that occurs in thislife.
In episode five, we heard thestory of Nancy DeMello.
(41:00):
She is a music teacher and aprofessional vocalist.
I encourage you to go back andlisten to episode five if you
haven't heard that inspiringstory.
At the end of that episode, wewere able to hear one of the
pieces from her album calledNancy DeMello and Friends.
today we get to hear another oneof those pieces from her friends
(41:25):
within that album.
the name of this piece is Thereis Hope.
It is produced by Steve Lurid,and the vocal artist is Rebecca
Lopez Penelillo.
(41:46):
This is a beautiful piece to endour story on the atonement of
our Savior, Jesus Christ.
Will you help me spread the goodword about this podcast by
subscribing to it, rating it,and best of all, sharing it with
(42:08):
two to three members of yourfamily and friends?
Thank you for joining me today.
For now, I will say farewell.
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