What if you have lots of friends, but nobody feels like your special confidante or the person who would have your back no matter what? The newest letter spotlight episode comes from a listener who signed off as "Too Many Fish in the Sea." She feels lucky to have cultivated a wide community and plenty of friends, but she doesn't feel like she has super close friends.
Joining me to answer the letter is my assistant producer, Rebekah Jacobs. Rebekah has been working with me for a while, but I wanted to get her on the mic so you can hear why I adore working with her so much. AND we're good friends---newer good friends--with our own friendship story to share.
We discussed concrete ways for getting closer to people you already like and creating deeper bonds: increase the frequency of your time together, share good news, be "messy," ask for a favor, change the venue, and become beginners together.
MEET REBEKAH JACOBS:
Rebekah has been a reading specialist and writing instructor for over 20 years, teaching in Boston, Chicago, DC, and Los Angeles. Currently, she teaches college writing in DC, and her own writing has been featured in Kveller. As assistant producer for Dear Nina, she is passionate about ideation and brainstorming creative concepts. She tries to read 80 books a year and loves TV—though, unlike Nina, cooking and tech are not her strong suit. She lives with her husband, three kids, and a goldendoodle named Peanut.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:
- Episode #19: with Rebekah Jacobs-- Novels and Memoirs About Friendship
- Episode #62: with Leslie Hooten-- The Friendship of the Weekly Walking Partners
- Episode #173: with Ruchi Koval-- I'm Just Not Into This Friendship
- Episode #126 with Anna Goldfarb-- Is it Time For a Friendship Cleanse?
- Episode #134 with SC Perot-- Fandom and the Potential for Friendship
- Anna's book: Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections
- Rebekah mentioned: The Five Types of Wealth by Sahil Bloom and a Laurie Santos reference to a beautiful mess here from Date Like A Scientist.
ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO
📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina
📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack
❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group
📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question
🔎 Want to w
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