Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
What up, you Dengues? This is definitely not good. The podcast we create stories and they're definitely probably not good
(00:06):
I'm your host CJ and I'm joined by my producer Nuckity. Hello
Hey, today we have a very special guest. We're joined by comedian Frederick White. What's good? Yo, it's good
He's positive. Yeah, get that get that round of pause going on everybody
Tell me good. We're good, man. I don't know what this is, but it's definitely not good
Yeah
(00:47):
This is your first time listening. This is pretty much how everything works. We are all amazing storytellers
Amazing. Thank you, and it's our job our duty to create a story completely from scratch
With a little twist we have a series of wheels. We're gonna spin each of them random and depending on where the wheel ends up
We have to somehow incorporate it into a just amazing stories amazing one
(01:10):
Somehow we're gonna do it
Stay tuned for that and we'll also have some totally real-not-fake sponsors
Come and straight to your earholes real quick. Come on. So stay tuned
We're gonna be kind of writing your ears. Oh, yeah
In your ears, but before that let's welcome Frederick White. Can we get that round of pause again?
That was so nice
(01:32):
Good stuff. How you doing? I'm blessed man. How you guys doing?
I'm good. Well, I got like where water is
My little water real
I feel like yeah, man. Good. Can't complain. That's what's up. That's what's up. I know not gonna be like to start with a little warm-up
Oh my past the baton over to him. Hey, Fred you're gonna get warm. Yeah, let's turn up. No, see how it
(01:56):
No, make it weird. Don't make it weird
Go ahead go ahead go ahead. Hey
To the best of your ability. Could you do me a favor? Was it could you uh could you name the three periods in the Mesozoic era?
The three periods in the Mesozoic area. Yeah
The three periods in the Mesozoic area
(02:20):
You got you got plantains the plantanial area. Oh, okay. That's when people are only want to get into that because it's real
Yeah, don't go too deep with these are the our minions all right, yeah, and a few I think a few Republicans who was back in the Mesozoic area
(02:44):
I'm the dude. I didn't know you know that it like all the stress. That's crazy. That is crazy
I feel very uneducated right now. I love this show. Wow
How did you just have that knowledge ready? I just thought of some things
I just yeah, I was like let me reach Mesozoic you know I'm saying yeah, Mesozoic
(03:08):
Mesozoic and then I thought of me so delioma
And it's all
Everything just like film film film like it was like a biker boy remember like Lawrence fish burying in biker boys
It was like one of those things. Oh, yeah, he was he was the old oh
Can we say that yeah
(03:30):
Fuck yeah
I see no could you watch your fucking mouth
Well, I think that was an actual warm-up this time because like I
Like I think you're ready for the show. Yeah, did I get your brain juices flowing wow?
You got me holy holy. Holy god. No, so I understand you're a comedian
How long you been telling jokes so I've been telling jokes inconsistently since 2000 well
(03:54):
I've been telling jokes on my life. Yeah, I've been like a class clown all that
But I actually first got on stage in 2015
I actually went by the stage name Ricky keys at the time
I was feeling like my Jamie Foxx, you know, I'm saying and I was cool
Then I had my son like in 2019
(04:15):
So I can't say I was super consistent. I was very inconsistent going up every now and then and then and two that ride right after
COVID it broke Nate's open backed up and I was just like fucking man
Let's do what I got to do to get on that stage and stay on that stage
So yeah, I start writing stay in more consistent getting better and better and
(04:36):
Yeah, man, so I say inconsistent 10 years consistent about five okay? Okay, let's begin the nates are you okay?
I was almost messed up
I know what to do bro. I was not a set as you man man
But I went through a breakup I did everything but died. Oh, yeah, I was like dang
Well, I was my home club and then but to hear that they coming back
(05:00):
I was like that that's a blessing
I'm sad that it's over further away from my house, but yeah, do we know do we know when it's coming back?
I'm not sure I'm not sure but I heard it's better it's better than it was
So okay, you're in better downtown though. Yeah, that's gonna be late. Got some less parking got some new implants
You know new girl. Yeah, yeah, let's less less parking
(05:22):
But I believe they could you could do a valet the server. Yeah, they have valet there. Hey, he loves hotels
Yeah, yeah, they give it they give them a good spot. You know
That is a good idea for like traveling Congress. Yeah, and that's the same thing was for too
I like the idea of paying people to live where my location is I also like that idea
(05:43):
So shout out to Nate that's pretty smart smart guy
We don't have a sponsor today, but we do have a wheel of random ass shit to spend so it's not as shit. Okay. Oh, sorry
Well, let's just see what we have today. Okay
What's the word
(06:04):
So
Like oh, no, I can just win the world like this greatly today
It's scratchies it scratches. Yeah, it's scratchies like you ever have a itch and you just scratch it and
That amazing feeling that you get we know. Yeah, we're probably sponsored by that
(06:24):
Yes
I don't know
The cut out see the list. Yeah, I can't ever off absolutely no one has ever been ever named it off
No, please it scratches
Deodorant
Oh my god
That says CJ CJ if he was foreign. Oh my goodness. Oh boy
(06:47):
bad to just apples
1245 p.m. Use your brain
Underrated video games dude. These are great fucking
Really, yeah, they're really they're pretty good. No, it's a sponsor. They're really
Crazy little sneak peek for you guys
(07:07):
What's today? We're proudly sponsored by itchy witches. I was scratching scratchy scratching scratching scratching
Where were you itchy Frederick? Where do you need to itch?
I don't I don't need to it's nowhere. I'm not okay, but if there's a scratch we'll scratch it
Egy scratches. What's your favorite inch spot like what hits the the fucking spot for you with
(07:31):
Clon
So I see there my underarm okay, right my underarms like a real good one
under my middies and
My balls okay, okay, all right. I like that. That's a good. I said. Well
I like the assessment
Under the middies this part right here under the middies bro. That's crazy
(07:53):
And I didn't realize it felt so good until I've seen a woman do it after she took our bra
Oh, yeah, they're fake like they don't feel that and then after the gym one day I was like
Dead, it's so good
I need to do this more often. I'd be scratching my head a lot. Oh the head is a good one to yeah, just like my entire head
Like there's no word that I don't want to be scratched you know what I mean where word what about you?
(08:17):
No, could you where it where is your itchie? Itchie with you?
All right now it's my back, but I have a fungus back there. So oh nice
You got a back fungus. Yeah, it's real weird. It's sub-dermal and it comes back every year and then goes away
sub-dermal. Why you being a water?
It's no it's like under under my skin. Oh
It's fucking it. You be in a water. You gotta say out the water because like I have like overactive sweat glands back there
(08:41):
Sex gland you'd buy so you know that you mess you act the way that it's the sexiest
It's an after so
But I get like these weird spots just to is it's gross like I can't get rid of
I get medicine like a cream to put on it and they'll go away, but like it takes forever that's the most 30 year old shit
I've already slept. We're talking about itchie with cheese right now
(09:02):
Yeah, shout out to itchie with cheese. Thank you for sponsoring
Yeah, you're just you just hit that great spot for us
Wow like a bear on a tree
bear on a tree
So I understand that you are into coma you're originally from California
(09:25):
Which is better to come or California? Whoa
Okay, oh
Let's start off with a warm up
You're right yeah
So I was born in Lancaster, California. I say the weather. I always miss the weather
(09:46):
But as far as
Anything to do like there's nothing to do there
You don't got like a ladyble time or nothing
No, yeah, no don't even got a medical time. Oh, we don't have many of the time. We used to
We used to it wasn't even a medieval time
We had a night at the round table nigga. Oh, yeah, the real we had Arthur and Merlin
(10:11):
I don't think it sounds like more than me medieval times black as fuck meat evil time
I'm just playing please my
It's you with cheese
We got round table pizza that's bad as me you're gonna get over here, but as far as the people are here's cool
I like watching the people
I like watching tin during the summer
I feel like that's when you're gonna act to club life is popping
(10:35):
I feel like the females though like just
Why did you fit all on talk talk like this?
I'm sick
I don't
You have
I'm a tool
It's a crazy part it's like you only a smoke cigarettes and you speak like that that's crazy
So the women are a little manly, but
(10:56):
Or at least manly around in little ass beat tough chicks
Yeah, and they're always doing that with their hands on no
Hands yeah, right fight right very combative very undomer
Not cute see
Undomer is
(11:19):
Yeah, I'm saying that all day today, man. Oh yeah, but uh, yeah, if I go to I mean I can't my kids here
So I feel like here is better to have my kids here and just home
Okay, so what's something that that freaking Washington needs to be better?
I feel like y'all need to
Uh
(11:40):
Looking at say from outside looking in I feel like the culture is different
I feel like out here they don't have her
I feel like it's just I feel like everybody is it's like crabs in a bucket you know I'm saying nobody wants to
Nobody wants to help anybody and if you do if you're doing better than them they like
(12:01):
Throw shade or have to hate you know I'm saying where I come from we come from the background of a big homie
You know, so it my big homie helped me you know, saying my big homie put me on my big homie. Let me know
Hey, they don't even know who the big homie is because if I got money you got money we both have money, you know
And that's the that's the concept and that that's because it all comes
(12:23):
Man, it's just a lot you know, I'm saying like the gang banging this kind of weird you know and saying
Where I'm from like
Crips and bloods like they intermingled because pussy good over there. I'm not gonna lie bro like I have
I've had crep cousins who wear red because nigga pussy good over there
I don't know what you talking about but pussy good over there so if I got to wear red and be in a different
(12:45):
Who my whole boy over there my family over here if I got a weird different color and be over there
That's one of them to do but out here. It's like it's like and and because we get press for that
Like you know I'm saying and they'll fight and they'll do what they got to do to be like
I think I'm still gonna get some pussy over here. You know what I'm saying out here. It's like
Muffa could be scary. I'm not gonna say scary, but it's just like it's not I don't feel like the bang and be right sometimes
(13:08):
You know I'm saying like
And maybe that's just because I come from California where that's all muffled cuz do is bang
You know I'm saying it's different. Yes, no. It's no suburb. You know the origin you know I'm saying like
When I'm from there's no suburb. Ninger there's not it's not it's not it out here you see suburb's and you'd be like
I'm really on my huge mountain on my hot shooter nigga nigga your mom is a lawyer your father's a firefighter
(13:34):
Like there's a forward explorer in your driveway the cop kind like me. What are you talking about all you
Amazures about I don't want to be a rapper now. Now what are you talking about like you lot of happens
Say good. I think it's a lot of it in the hotel bro bro look man. I didn't know
You could come to Washington and Ninger's actually had lives and houses outside of like the street life
(13:58):
Like I feel like Washington they be living like the double standard like the double life
Like they bang they'll bang even me. They still go to school getting to work
They still go to work. They still do all those things. We're all come from Ninger's just gang bang
There's nothing else there's no school. There's no work. There's Ninger. I'm I'm a crib Ninger. I'm a soup
(14:19):
They beat they gave me so much they caught themselves super crips
Okay
Super and friend of them because it's like negative quality all I do is game back
Professional crib yeah, and I feel like then you got people like you know
Oh boy a 55 55
Crip you know
Him 55 55 55 you know, I'm saying he come from the suburb
(14:39):
She know I'm saying like you have people who make it look cool
When gaming and it wasn't cool
That's how I look that when I was raised when I was growing brought up by my granny she wasn't like that's it's
Cool you know I'm saying yeah
Like dumb ningers do that shit ningers who want to be in the system do that shit
You know I'm saying my focus who want to fit the description they gang bang
(15:01):
My focus want to be different do other shit yeah, go be different go do some other shit
Go do shit these motherfuckers call you a nerd for
Yeah, you know exactly that's literally me and um and I had to learn you for me from
Fucking this I was going to school bro and I kid you not and there was this bad little female bro when I was in school
(15:21):
And she didn't like no thugs
Like that shit was not cute to her like all the thugs are trying to pop out at all all the niggas you for me
Bro when you look at who she married she married the nerd
Bro like this nigga bro. He says this nigga Tony bro is like a nerd bro my bad
I'm live in shit, but this nigga's a nerd bro, but it's like you ain't got a beat a thug
(15:45):
Ass nigga you just got to be yourself as you like both
No, it was like a nerd
He's a nerd okay, like it's a good nerd though. You know I'm saying he's like he's like the watch anime
You know I'm saying type of not know run with his arms out type of nerd
You know say not the anime runner nerd, but the nerd you know saying he got a cake game
(16:06):
You film me I'm gonna cool a little fake gay
He's he's a
Racialian big US nerd you know, sad is that how you say it you're saying yeah like a niggas nerd to be honest
It sounds like you're just describing me and a little bit
You know
My skin hold up a car
They got
(16:27):
Single
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, may I but as far as I feel like just my family's out here so you know
I would choose here
So real question what is gang-bang and look like in
2020 five because I'm not gonna I don't want any
Mysticism here or I don't want any anything to feel or seem like I'm a certain way
(16:49):
I'm a nerd. I'm not a gang man
Never been no, no, but like I
the Gita Milly won, especially coming from Washington,
like, what does it actually look like in 2020?
Cause I don't know.
To me, it's, it's died.
Yes, it's way down.
It's just died.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, high school, it was different.
(17:09):
But now it's like, I don't know.
I feel like once you hit a certain age,
you shouldn't be around gangbangers.
And if you are around gangbangers,
your mentality kind of young.
I think it could.
You should start be starting to think about a pinching
in a 401k, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
I are a, things like that.
Like you shouldn't be sitting here thinking about
(17:29):
what's the next knock?
You know what I'm saying?
We'll borrow, we'll chill out tonight.
I don't even go out, bro.
You feel me?
And I'm a nerd because that's what I,
I was told was cool.
You feel me like my pops is a blood.
You feel me.
He's gang bang from, he didn't go to school.
Only time he went to school was to put a football,
his football, uh, fucking cleats on play a game.
(17:50):
And after that, he said,
I'm a good one drug.
Oh, man.
Did I see eating care?
And it's crazy that they had schools like that,
where most of you didn't have to show up,
didn't have to produce, but could play,
fucking, had a five star level.
You know what I'm saying?
It's just weird to me.
But yeah, I feel like it's died a lot.
And I don't, I'm not saying it to where I wanted to come back.
I just feel like, not, not.
(18:12):
People should be there, man.
If you're a nerd, I think a gang bang kind of,
went on a decline when it became cool to be a good dad.
Yeah, it's hard to be a guy's in a good dad, man.
Yeah, my dad was my dad was my dad was.
My dad was, my dad was a, he kept me,
he put me in certain situations,
but he kept me out of a lot of fucked up situations.
Like, he's fine.
But I did see a lot when I was a kid.
(18:33):
You know what I'm saying?
My dad used to sell crack.
So I remember my fuckers coming and doing whatever the fuck
they could just to get a hit.
So, and I'm like, four or five years old watching
his mouth fucker's like, you are stupid.
You know, so I'm very observing.
And I've learned, I've learned a lot from other people's
mistakes.
You know, so I think that's what I, what I take a lot,
(18:54):
you know what I'm saying.
There was this one crack at a boat.
He used to steal movies out of a blockbuster truck.
Every week, bro, he comes every week, bro.
He would come with a big ass bag of fucking movies.
And he had this power Ranger movie, bro,
that he would like.
He would never pitch no movies, bro,
but he would always pitch this power of a Ranger movie.
Let's make a pitch to power Ranger movie by that.
Bought the power Ranger movie one time, bro.
(19:17):
I popped this bitch in, it's this nigga in different
colored tarps, Toma's morson time.
Yeah, Zordon was a piece of crack.
It was too little rocksy held together,
he was talking with the crack rocks, man, more from thought.
Niggas, I was like, oh hell no.
I thought I was like a deadly.
Yeah, he's like a good one.
I was like, this is crazy, bro.
I can't just do anything.
(19:38):
That's what I was like.
The freezer gonna be crazy.
Yeah, that's what I was like.
It was fucking nuts.
Wow.
I got a question for you guys.
Why did you decide to be good fathers?
You want to go ahead and answer first?
My dad was a good father, so.
Yeah, my dad was dope, bro.
That's all I have, most my dad, my granny.
My mom, she going through her things in life.
(19:59):
You saw me, so I lived with my dad, I said my granny,
they brought me up, right?
Okay.
And then that's all I knew really is just to be a dad.
So it really is just good parenting.
Like if you have good parents, you just got me a good parents.
First, yes, first.
Some people have good parents and want a gang van.
So people have sit parents and want a good parents.
They want to be good parents.
But for me, I just, my dad was always there.
(20:24):
That's a dad.
Yeah.
It's going well.
Yeah.
If I'm a dad kid, my mom would do this right.
You know what, that was dope, a change.
Because there's a lot of bad dads out there.
They're like, well, are they all going to a bad dad university or something?
Like, just I only hear about bad dads.
So my dad had a bad dad.
My dad, my granddad, he got all the Vietnam and he.
(20:45):
Sinking the drugs and like depression real bad.
So my dad was like 11 years old.
The youngest in his family raising his self raising his family basically.
You know how to 11 bro.
So he had the experience of having a bad dad.
And he like made that promise to me like he would never be that person.
Right.
So my dad still get him better.
Like our canyons front.
(21:06):
My dad was like 100 pounds this year.
Like he's fucking he's killing the game right now.
Yeah, shout out to my pops.
Got him.
But yeah, my dad was a great dad and him having a bad dad.
I feel like made him go either harder.
You know what I'm saying?
So I appreciate that.
Okay.
Well, shoot shout out to the good dads out there.
Yeah.
Bad, bad, bad.
(21:26):
Yeah.
Last question for you before we get started.
What the fuck are we wait?
I don't I.
What do you mean get started?
Well, we have to tell Ben here.
We have to tell a bad story.
You know.
Oh, my God.
It's been all I've been here.
I've been here 36 minutes.
Oh, yeah.
I think it's been all good shit.
(21:47):
We got to get to the bad shit.
Oh, yeah.
I like to know what are movies that you like where TV shows.
When he watch TV, what am I watching?
Yeah.
I'm an anime head bro.
Okay.
What are you talking about?
I'm an anime.
No, I'm an herb.
Oh, no.
I'm an herb.
I don't know.
But I don't put myself out there like that.
(22:07):
Okay.
I feel like you got to let people.
You can't let people know your soft side.
You're from me.
I feel like my nerd is my soft side.
You know what I'm saying?
When I grew up, like I said, when I grew up, my focus told me it was cool to be in
books.
Like you being in a books, bro.
Look at the he's looking dumb.
I think he's still trying to make a dollar.
You being in books will take you way further.
(22:28):
I don't have any experience, but that's not stuff.
And it's just crazy because now I think about that shit and I think about all the crazy
situations I was in when I was writing or away from what the motherfuckers was doing.
I think I was going to see the difference now.
You feel me.
But yeah, anime movies.
I like the John Wick sagas.
(22:49):
Yeah.
I fuck.
We can't read stuff.
He's a kid.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Can't read dope.
Let me see.
I'm watching Abby Elementary right now.
Hey, Alan Elementary's Hello Funding.
You cross over.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
(23:11):
Yeah.
You know her ex boyfriend who's ex.
Quinties?
No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Quinties and ex boyfriend in the show.
The rapper.
I don't know.
You know what I'm talking about?
I haven't seen Abby.
No.
You got a lot.
You got Abby Elementary.
Abby Elementary is hilarious.
Like the best show on TV right now.
I'm best show.
Right now I'm watching solo leveling.
(23:33):
Hell yeah.
That's my people.
That's dope.
I'm playing anime.
Baby.
Yeah.
If I don't know.
Yeah.
As a little Korean one.
I might have to sink into Korean anime damn brothers.
I know.
I know.
They're character development real fast.
Yeah.
I'm used to my favorite anime's per se to the maximum.
Oh, I see.
(23:54):
Yeah.
So I'm used to the 15, 16 episodes transition of a person.
But for them to just dive right into.
He's the shit.
I was like, hold up.
Wonderful.
That happened fast.
So I'm digging there right now.
First episode.
He was a bitch.
Not anymore.
Yeah.
Exactly.
Um, yeah.
I think that's all I could think of right now.
(24:16):
Me and my five year old.
We started Dragon Ball Z.
Hell yeah.
All the way over from Dragon Ball.
That's what I'm talking about.
And a bro.
I can't front.
Like it's helped me a lot on my mental journey.
Because you literally watch a person who in our time right now.
Because we didn't even watch Dragon Ball.
We're always doing what I mean.
(24:37):
I mean, well, you're Korean.
So I'm a agent.
I mean, I love agents.
I mean, you know, on the smudd it man.
Well, no, but forget, um, when I remember watching Dragon Ball Z,
it started when Radius came to Earth.
Right.
That's the first episode I ever remember watching.
Now you see me.
(24:58):
You don't send and he put us on.
And I didn't even know it was the some shit before that until I got older.
And I'm like, let's too late.
I'm already on Dragon Ball Super.
I'm on Diamond Y, you know, but I'm not Diamond.
Yeah.
Wow.
I wanted, it's just GT.
It's just GT.
I'm a GT.
I'm a GT.
Yeah, Diamond.
Yeah, Diamond.
(25:19):
They just knocked the whole GT saga that we know.
And they just rebate it as Diamond.
GT gets a bad round name.
It's the same.
I mean, it started five years and they just did whatever
the hell they could think of.
That's not fair.
Whatever they thought of like, are you liking them?
Dragon Ball?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
He, he, he, he, he, he, me and my son we watched all the episodes
(25:39):
Dragon Ball.
We just hit a Dragon Ball Z.
We're, uh, we're at the freezer fight now.
Okay.
And he's loving it.
But it, yes, helped it.
I wanted it my son to see character development, but literally
someone who started from nothing to come done.
Nothing.
And it's helped me all my journey so much.
Because you feel me.
It's helped me all my journey so much.
Because that's what you got to do.
(26:00):
But sometimes you just got to start from ground zero, man.
And just work your way up.
Yeah.
Because after you hit rock bottom, there's no where else to go.
But, you know what I'm saying?
So that's just dope.
Sometimes you just got to roll with the first girl I brought
you over.
And then shoot you for some reason.
Yeah.
I see you guys are married.
Mm.
All right.
(26:21):
Let's get started with this dumbass podcast.
Okay.
I start our first wheel is our genre wheel.
Yeah.
What are we making today?
Yeah.
Well, you want to push it?
You're all gonna push it.
Just spin it.
You're just spin it.
Go and Harry Potter with like four.
Yeah, Harry Potter, Harry Potter.
Friends, Harry Potter.
General one is unlikely hero.
(26:42):
Unlike
like, like your hero.
Like Goku.
Yeah.
I mean no.
Hey, I'm not going.
I'm not.
Argh.
SoORA's got a bad belly.
I got something to say the word.
Not going to lie.
I love a good unlike you, unlike the hero.
like you unlikely hero.
I'm sure you're here.
I'm here with you.
Our next wheel is our setting.
(27:02):
We're only taking place.
There we go.
There we go.
Wow.
I'm down by the bed and there.
Wow.
Whoa.
Whoa.
El Dorado.
The like the hidden city.
It's the old rock city.
The golden city.
Yeah.
All right.
We'll do the right all this one.
Yeah.
That's what we're doing.
Our next wheel is our character job.
What's the job of the main character?
(27:24):
It's a little bit too good.
Wow.
The old Dorado.
A pipe layer.
Who's lamb pif.
I mean, back we taking a couple different ways.
A pipe layer?
Pipe layer.
A pipe layer.
A pipe layer.
El Dorado.
The golden city.
The gold stroke.
You, you, me.
Our next wheels are character flaw.
(27:46):
Something is wrong with this pipe layer.
What is it?
The little one.
The little one.
The little one.
That's a little done.
That's a little done.
That's a little done.
That's a little done.
That's a little done.
That's a problem.
That's a problem, Brian.
I'm from, man.
I was a Maconette, this girl one time, bro.
Yeah.
(28:06):
And that was a, she just would not catch.
You know what?
I'm talking about.
You all know what you're all throwing down the real game.
You know what I'm saying.
Like.
You're wearing.
You're married.
Yeah.
So you know what I'm talking about.
You married.
You got a re-cat you on.
You nasty.
You all said, sometimes, and I was throwing down the Mac
(28:26):
bro and she told me, she said me,
Darren, she's like, look bro, I just can't be with you
and I said why?
She's like, because you're too fine.
She's like, you so fine that when you lead a house,
I'm going worried about where the fuck you at.
That is perfect.
That's the fuck you doing and who the fuck you is.
And I'm like, that's dumb.
That stupid is here.
Why would you worry about that if I told you
I'm at the fucking grocery store?
(28:48):
I'm at fucking Costco.
You're at the grocery store.
The grocery store with that is 1215.
I'm at Costco.
What do you think I'm doing?
I started another family with her.
The fuck would I be at Costco for?
You think that's crazy with him?
Hose?
That's crazy.
Why?
At Costco at 1215.
A sample time.
He's going to Costco.
Got it.
Let's go.
OK.
You know what's crazy?
And the crazy thing is you could literally give a female
(29:11):
your location bro and they like they get crazy.
It's like they're crazy.
They're watching.
Yeah.
I've walked in on a female that had my blue dot on her
television.
That's what she was watching her Netflix special on her
phone and watching my blue dot on her 46th and TV.
That's it.
I said, oh no, that pussy good than a mother fucker.
(29:33):
It's just turn around.
The little chair starts our clap.
It's like a master.
No, I didn't care.
I was like, this is amazing.
Wow.
I was going home.
Oh, my.
Wow.
It's coming.
OK.
I can see how that could be.
Our next wheel, second to last wheel, is our antagonist who's the bad
person of the story.
Mm.
Oh, my.
My.
(29:54):
My.
My.
My.
My.
Water.
Just straight up water.
Water is the bad guy.
Water is the bad guy.
I'm a little bit more interesting.
Very interesting.
OK.
So to recap, we have an unlikely hero.
An unlikely hero.
An elder auto guy who lays pipe is too attractive.
(30:16):
And the main enemy, the main antagonist is water.
Frederick, would you like to play our pipe layer today?
I get to play the pipe layer.
Yeah, I'm going to lay some pipe.
Yeah, I'm going to lay some pipe.
I want to be sexy as fuck.
Lay in pipe.
I'll lay some pipe.
What's the good name for this pipe layer?
Rodrigo Rodrigo Rodrigo the pipe layer.
(30:36):
So we're going to the year is 2,849.
Wow.
And we are descending on a beautiful, lavish city of El Dorado.
OK.
Gold Street, gold sidewalks.
Wow.
Diamond, street lights, paradise.
You told me this beautiful.
This is incredible.
(30:57):
People are walking down the street.
There is everybody is just looking amazing actually.
Like everybody looks like a super model.
Everybody's got a tank.
Everybody's got a tank.
Everybody's got a tank.
Everybody's at thick girls from El Dorado.
Clarkton.
Right.
That's fucking ugly.
It's thick.
Except for the face.
They look very, they got some butter faces going on.
But, I think cut to a manhole.
(31:21):
OK.
I look gold-flated.
What's his name?
No, no, no.
This is a metal cover on a street corner.
Oh, smells.
Lift up.
Alpops the most handsome man you've ever seen.
Much is here.
Actually, he takes a wrap off.
It's Rodrigo after just laid some pipe.
He comes out with his bag of tools, goes off to the corner, and he gets cat called by some
(31:44):
girls.
What's that, Steven?
What's up, ladies?
How's it going?
What's you doing after this?
My name's Rodrigo, I'm laying pipe.
Oh, it's named Rodrigo.
Oh, you can lay the pipe.
They high five.
I'm sorry.
I'm a professional.
They high five.
(32:04):
I'm sorry, man.
I'm a professional pipe layer.
You got to reach my consultant agency.
One of the other pipe layers comes out.
It's really sweaty and big.
Hey, I'm keeping moving, ladies.
Keep it moving.
They're getting a fuck out of here.
Come on.
Get out of here.
Get out of here.
Put your punches.
Skanks, man.
Damn.
(32:24):
People leave him.
Always, always an erupting artwork.
Our work.
You know, yeah, this is crazy.
Our work.
I know.
We're not that good looking.
That's right.
Yeah, right.
But this hard work for me too, man.
Out here, getting denied for being so sexy.
What are all this pipe?
Not everybody wants a sexy pipe layer.
(32:46):
You know what, what, what husbands do when, when they see a sexy pipe layer, along to
the doorbell, it's a place of pipe.
What did they do?
They reject them.
And they call the ugly pipe layers like you fuckers.
Oh, are we ugly?
Are we?
You just said you were ugly.
I didn't say that.
I was just saying you were.
He said you guys were ugly.
And you didn't say nothing.
So you will agree to be in fucking.
I find all greeted.
(33:07):
That's why I asked fuck.
Now go lay some.
Lay your rusty, crusty pipes somewhere else and get away from my golden, long pipes.
Well, Rodrigo, we're, me and Andy here.
We're going to invite you out for lunch place.
We're going to put it that way.
I guess I'll just go outside.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, we're going to take it to gym some.
(33:27):
But now, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Andy and my wife and I.
Andy and my wife.
And then the supervisor.
I'm sitting here by myself.
My golden strong.
Got to lay all these pipes.
Now you guys lift all these pipes.
The supervisor comes out.
(33:48):
It is a lady.
Her name is Lydia.
Did you say golden slong?
Yeah.
The student of my pipe brand.
The golden slong pipe layer.
Well, that's why I get five stars.
That's what I'm happy with.
That's right.
The yellow previews speaking over yellow previews.
We should probably talk in my office.
Right here.
(34:09):
Go about what?
Should probably talk in my office.
I'm not going in there office.
I'm not doing that.
We could talk right here and I'll be.
Whatever you got to say to me, all the pipe layers need to hear.
Well, I am your supervisor and.
Yeah.
Survive these pipes.
That's what you need.
I'll be supervising as all these pipes.
That is my job.
Yeah.
Okay.
(34:29):
Don't supervise me.
Supervisor pipe.
Okay, Rodrigo.
We're getting one star reviews because you're not having sex.
Stop the fuck up.
We need to go on your office.
The hell would you say it's shit I'll allow for?
What the hell would you?
What would you have now said in front of the other pipe.
I'm the golden pipe layer.
You're absolutely right, Rodrigo.
I'm so sorry.
Let's go into my office.
(34:50):
Thank you.
Thank you.
This was your respect.
You know what?
You go on a side draw office.
I'm a close door.
I'm a stand-out side draw office.
And you speak to me that way.
Okay.
That sounds good.
Yeah.
I'm also going to give you a raise.
I hope you'll get that.
You know what?
I'll come your office.
It's all right.
I'll come all over your office.
I'll come inside your office.
(35:12):
Come outside your office.
Come on.
Run, come in.
I'm, yeah.
Let's go in your office.
This is, yeah.
So, bring it down.
As they're walking.
As they're walking to the office, a thunder cloud comes.
Water starts.
Bring down on the city.
The central rain, very, very fast to flood every second.
What kind of rain is for the spiders?
(35:33):
Torrential.
Torrential.
They say it wrong.
It's spider rain, nigga.
Yeah.
It's the ranch.
This is the rain.
This is the ranch.
It's the rain.
I can't go outside.
Water and spiders.
They come get in my pipes.
They get on your hair.
Water's bite.
They do.
They're all over you, man.
And also, it kind of, it's kind of weighing you down a little bit.
Like your, your hands on this is actually, you know, looking so good.
(35:55):
You know, usually people look good when they're wet.
No, I don't really go.
I'm a frog.
Look like a, like a sad, soggy rat.
Actually, the water makes him look ugly.
That's amazing.
Water makes you look ugly.
And for some reason.
And Lydia gets kind of like looks at him to, you know what?
Actually, now that I see you like this, all wetness stuff, I think maybe maybe you
(36:20):
should take the day off and we can talk about this some more.
Also, these streets are flooded.
Look at it.
Like you haven't laid pipe fast enough, obviously.
Look at people are dying.
My pipe lay my pipe tastes tired.
I got a good pipe.
These things just regular pipe.
Oh, Willie, now they're saying, stream me pipe.
This corporate industry of pipe.
I'm laying.
Or are you going to need to think less about your willy and nilly and more about pipes.
(36:43):
I'm laying all types of pipes.
One of the people rent up.
I'm my car's crowding.
And my kids in there, can you help me?
She's like, we're talking right now.
You're being rude.
You're being rude.
You're being rude.
You're being rude.
This is my grandma.
Okay, I'll leave only if you can.
Yes, thank you.
The fuck.
(37:04):
The hell is this problem.
Audrey, go up.
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Okay.
Go home and get some rest, wash up.
It's really good.
You look in the fog.
I'm going to lay some pipe.
I'm going to do a little bit of that.
I'm going to go lay some pipe off the clock.
I'm going off the clock pipe layer.
Oh, that's what he said.
He's a worker as far as spider crawls on his eyes.
Oh my god.
Okay.
See you later.
It's a ranch of the rain.
(37:25):
Watch out, guys.
It's a momma.
No, did he?
The rain is little spiders, but they're made out of water.
They're harmless, but they're real creepy.
What was the floggin' two sexy?
Two sexy.
Two good looking.
Okay.
I nailed the rain.
So we're going to cut to his apartment.
(37:47):
It's a pretty nice apartment.
All gold.
All diamond.
Because I pipe.
It's a pretty good in this spot.
It's overlooks the city of Velderado.
In his apartment.
It is his wife, waiting for him.
Her name.
Her name?
Yes.
Her name is the ring on it.
Her name is Patricia.
She sounds hot.
(38:08):
Yeah.
She sounds good.
She's not.
She's not.
So have you guys seen the road to Velderado?
Of course.
You know, she'll show from the turning of shell.
I don't know her name.
The bad one.
The bad one.
She dressed like her by her facing.
That was great.
It's like the guy.
(38:29):
Right.
Right.
We're going to call you.
Which you might playing the wife.
Sure.
And my god.
Her name is going to be Patricia.
Patricia.
Hi.
Hi.
Welcome home.
Oh my god.
This is what I have to come home to.
The Golden Pipe Layer.
I'm so glad to know how my cookie some.
(38:50):
I don't want it.
I don't want it.
I don't want it too long to pronounce it.
I don't want it with your cookie.
I mean, a mushroom stew for this.
No way.
Baby, delicious.
I made it for you.
Mushrooms.
They don't even go together.
Mushrooms.
You can't even get a stew based from mushrooms.
I thought pipe layers loved mushrooms.
No, pipe layers don't love with that.
Do I look at Mario with Luigi?
(39:12):
I'm not laying regular pie.
That's plastic green pipe.
I'm laying gold pipe.
Okay.
You know what you're like, baby.
I'm sorry.
I'm not thinking you can pizza.
Why do you have a list?
Why did what?
She has a snack with two.
Oh my gosh.
No.
How comes your daughter?
Her name is mushroom tip soup.
(39:33):
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
The daughter's name is foul.
Found.
The daughter's name is foul.
She's so cool.
How's it going?
How was playing pipe today?
What's up, princess?
How are you doing?
I'm doing good.
Mom keeps trying to put this soup down my throat.
I don't like it.
Yeah.
It's mushroom tip soup.
(39:54):
I feel like it's full of fire.
It's mushroom tip stew.
I don't know what to tell you.
She keeps trying to give me the eat it too.
I don't want any foul.
How was your day to the house school?
It was good.
But we had a can't go school because of the torrental rain.
The torrentular rain.
It was spiders everywhere.
I understand.
(40:15):
I understand.
Are you okay?
How do you feel?
I feel good.
Oh, it is p.n.
We got to stop this conversation.
No, I don't want any more soup.
I got to watch ESPN.
Now back to our regular day sports.
But unfortunately, we do have breaking news.
There is spider rain going on.
(40:36):
I live here all the rotto.
All over.
All over.
It just keeps coming.
And the foundation of pipeline association.
We'll speak on it.
Yeah, it's just we have one person who's supposed to be doing it.
And he's just been sleeping around.
I don't want to know names.
But he is he is Rodrigo.
He's been trying to sleep with everyone.
I think he thinks laying pipe means having sex with a dog.
(41:00):
He's been going to his name.
He's been trying to sleep with everyone.
I think he thinks laying pipe means having sex with a dog.
We just need pipe.
We need good infrastructure in the city of El Dorado.
If you're talking about, yeah.
Why would it be?
There's a million Rodrigos in the world.
I've never met another Rodrigo.
(41:21):
That's a lie.
And I have a picture of him right here.
Cut to the picture.
Yep.
That's him.
I know it.
He's a Muslim.
He's a Muslim man in El Dorado.
But he also.
He's having sex with a lot of women.
I think all.
I've got to say why would they pick that picture?
That picture right there is the most horrendous pictures I've ever seen in myself.
(41:45):
Second of all, they hired me to lay pipe.
Sweetheart.
To lay pipe.
Why'd you marry me?
Why'd you marry me?
When you marry me.
Or not.
No, no.
On our wedding night, what'd you say?
He sure knows how to lay pipe.
And ever since that day, I went out there.
I got indeed applications.
Application after application.
I put him on resume.
I know how to lay pipe.
(42:07):
And boom, founders industrial corporation for the pipe layers.
And I became the golden pipe layer.
From laying pipe.
Dad, do you not like mom anymore?
No, I love your mom.
That guy was a little bit more provider.
But this is my mom.
Come on man.
This is your mom receives the married pipe.
Okay.
This is women out here that need to see.
Received an industrial corporate.
Fucking, you know, you know, the pipe everybody else.
(42:28):
You know, the mediocre pipe, the friendly pipe.
The community pipe.
That's what everybody else.
Your mom get prime, prime real estate pipe.
Okay.
Your mom get echoed the pipe.
Your mom get the pipe that don't know by even see.
Okay.
That's the pipe your mom get.
My, my dad does community pipes.
Yeah.
Do community pipes.
(42:49):
Listen to me.
Look at me.
Look at me.
Look at me.
No, I would not.
Stop spinning on me, Patricia.
Out there.
You don't bring that in here.
I don't bring it in here.
I don't bring it in here.
Every time I go open to do it, I don't see.
I don't see it.
I don't see it.
I'll scoot to old pipe.
I'll put the gold pipe on.
You'll keep that pipe out there, babe.
That it is out there.
Send the truck right now.
(43:10):
Send the truck.
Then we're good.
We're fine.
We're fine.
We'll be fine.
But I need, I need to leave.
Where you going?
Where you going?
Go back.
You're going to clean my other pipe.
Oh, oh, you're going to go clean.
Can pipe?
Is that where you go?
We're going to go clean.
We're going to go clean.
We're going to go clean.
Mom, mom.
That's going to save the city. He's going to fix the pipes.
(43:31):
If then all the spider is in all the water is going to go away.
Honey, honey, honey, you make a good point.
Go to fucked to your room, please.
Go on my room.
Babe.
Babe.
Yes.
I'm just trying to.
You keep that pipe out of my house.
You understand me?
Listen, if you spit on me, you spit on me again.
I'm a brain.
You know what?
(43:52):
I'm bringing the pipe.
I mean, you know what?
That's what you mean.
You don't spit on me.
She just spit on me.
She just suddenly fell.
She fell down by the floor.
And then they start fucking.
Oh, God.
Yeah. They go ahead and real harm.
It's a long sex thing.
Patricia.
Listen, say seven.
This is a sausage sizzling in a sausage.
I don't know.
Maybe I can do it.
(44:13):
Maybe I can do it.
Maybe I can do it.
I can do it.
I can do it.
I found a way to your room.
We're going to take a short break.
We got graphic in here.
Oh, my gosh.
We got so graphic in here.
We're going to take a short break and get right back to this.
Uh, our rated movie.
I'm going to give our real quick.
This is hilarious.
Don't go anywhere.
Cut.
Hey, do you like t-shirts?
(44:34):
Maybe hats.
Well, I got good news for you.
The merch store is open.
Come check us out at link tree.com slash dngpod.
Click the merch link and get yourself a definitely not good shirt.
Or definitely not good hat.
And for a limited time,
grab your stuff.
I am the water god bling teacher.
This is in the limited stock and won't be there for him.
(44:55):
Thank you for supporting us.
And now let's get back to definitely not good.
Whoo.
Hey, we're back.
Hi.
We have another sponsor.
You can believe it.
Let's spin that sponsor wheel.
Hey,
Hey,
Hey,
(45:16):
Hey,
Hey,
Hey,
Hey,
Hi,
refrigerator.
The episode is proudly sponsored by
refrigerator,
H目gerators,
And what goes inside it in the셨나요 And the other refrigerator
I love tricks.
I love eats he day,
LMB let's go.
You ever open up your refrigerator
and then come back to Minnesota thinking something's changed?
(45:37):
All constantly,
Yeah,
Yeah,
I've Fred and you've ever planned a revolution,
but maybe in the future you're that'll actually.
Like,
I don't know.
Something will happen.
I grocery store and directly into our refrigerator?
Yeah,
I mean nowadays it can happen.
It can happen.
I feel like they will make like full regenerating for a refrigerator.
When do you throw something out of the refrigerator?
(46:01):
When it's bad?
Yeah, like do you guys have an expiration date?
Like what's okay?
Okay, here's a better question.
What's something that's in your refrigerator right now
that you haven't thrown away?
You know what bro? There's a big ass thing.
Okay bro.
There's a big ass thing of Costco mayo.
(46:22):
That I don't even know when we bought that one for a couple.
But that's just still bushing.
Like it's still bushing.
It's still white there.
You're saying it's still sound good.
It's still sound good.
It's still white.
It's still sound good.
It's still sound good.
It's still sound good.
It's not white then.
Yeah, it's a little mustard taste.
But it's good mayo.
Yeah, yeah, I don't really.
(46:44):
I don't know man.
That's crazy.
I say when yeah, gotta be like before the mole.
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know,
like once you start looking like like dried out,
that's when I got to go.
You got to say that white shit on it.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I want you to do?
I didn't try it out.
It got to go.
(47:04):
Well, hey, real question.
What do we do before in for drazers?
Oh man, it was a time before we had it.
They had like, yeah, they had like icebox like
cupboards almost.
You know what they used to do?
They used to take like a wooden crate and they fill it
with salt and they put whatever they wanted in there
to preserve it.
Yeah, that's how that's come on.
What the fuck?
(47:25):
That's come on.
That's come on.
What are we doing?
We are in America.
Oh, this is America.
It's so okay.
We just keep outside as a refrigerator.
Yeah, it does have to just have to be some more gold.
Put it in this.
No, baby.
I was a rough time.
Guys.
Hey, real quick.
Glad to be allowed now.
Shout out to the refrigerators.
Shout out.
Thank you for your time.
Shout out to refrigerators for your sponsors.
(47:47):
Yeah.
Also, in debt crews.
Also like, for your dealers like put heads in refrigerators.
And stuff.
I don't know about all that.
Let's get this put out.
You know what I'm saying?
Why?
Why don't we take that turn?
Why was that the turn we took?
Roger, you got to preserve your heads.
Oh, no.
Oh my gosh, bro.
You know what I was in.
You know, there was a story about this dude that like, like
(48:09):
the headed like eight people on a fucking Greyhound.
Do you all remember that, Sam?
Yeah.
You all remember that story.
Brows like 12 years old, but it was like national news.
His dude cut off eight people's head on a Greyhound, bro.
Why?
First of all, how the fuck?
Like, nobody else noticed.
Yeah.
He's out of the Greyhound, man.
Everybody sleeping.
(48:29):
The fuck?
The chainsaw, big mirror.
He's the crazy dude.
It was crazy.
It was crazy.
I heard that shit.
Anybody else here?
Nope.
Bro, I heard that shit.
And it was like the, I just had got off of a Greyhound when I heard this story.
It's all like, oh, here it is.
It's never doing Greyhound again, bro.
You got to be best though.
Well, what on Greyhound?
(48:49):
Never look down.
I didn't know you.
I saw the Diana Greyhound.
I'm sorry, man.
That's crazy.
You ain't even reach out destination.
That's rough.
I need to know that.
You're man.
You will go on the highway.
Yeah.
And they're not comfortable.
Not kind of that all.
You'll go on the fucking highway.
Orucy's just says you, whoo, whoo, whoo, scared.
That's the fuck that part to be a ghost on the home of freeway.
(49:10):
You got point five seconds for that corner pass.
Oh, damn.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I get them.
I have no clue.
They said the bus started to stink and he stopped.
He stopped to let everybody off.
I'd have stopped and eight people didn't get off the bus.
(49:31):
And he stayed on the bus and he walked up to him.
And literally he touched the guy on the show during his hair fell off.
The hell?
Yeah.
Is this real?
This real boga.
Look at that.
They have killers.
They're like that, but I kid you nuts.
It's crazy.
Um, let's try.
It was like, hey, quiet down back there.
And folks, he came from the back seats of the bus.
(49:51):
They telling me right here on my own, my own life.
They telling me the whole story about the gray-hound killer.
That's crazy.
He's showing me.
And this is why you don't take a ground bus.
That's crazy.
I didn't get y'all got the green river killer.
Like we could go inner tubing.
Like this is just telling me.
I didn't go, you know, vision me.
Oh, hey, lady, my fucking bummer is it.
(50:12):
Oh, my god.
I was killed as though he was an artist.
He wasn't hurt.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my gosh.
I'm not touching that with a stick.
I'm not touching that with this dick neither, man.
Where we last.
Oh, so dead.
Where we last left off on our amazing story.
Uh-huh.
Rod Rigo.
Rod Rigo.
Um, pipe player.
(50:32):
Um, Rod Rigo.
And Elder Rod and pipe player.
Wait until the Rodo.
He hasn't been of an issue.
There is a torrential tarantula rain going on.
Uh, and Elder Rondo.
And Elder Rod.
Flooding the streets.
The pipe for not very good.
Also there's some marital problems at home.
Um, speaking of flood in the streets, I don't mean to derail the show.
They were doing right now.
Sure.
(50:52):
Have you got seen what happened in the fucking Detroit right now?
No.
They fled into Troy.
Nick.
Like right now.
Little, little, little, little.
It's in the war center.
God, Terry, by Ind Detroit for real for real.
Because it's bad.
So apparently a water main burst.
And it flooded like four feet in some parts of the city.
And then it fucking froze because it's like two degrees.
Yeah, yeah.
(51:13):
So it's just ice.
Uh, okay.
They're getting fucked right now.
Damn.
Yeah, I feel so bad for Detroit.
We'll shout out to Detroit.
I'm sorry to hear that out of Detroit.
I just heard something about that.
I didn't know it was in Detroit.
Yeah, yeah.
So that's crazy.
Oh, man.
And that's dirty water too.
Is dirty water.
You can't even see through it.
At least there's no spiders in the water though.
(51:34):
Yeah, that's true.
Like that's the good thing.
They'll be there.
No, no, they'll be there.
No, they'll be there.
It froze over.
It froze over.
It froze over.
Cars halfway buried in ice.
It's crazy.
And it's cold.
Yeah.
Oh, Detroit.
It's not.
Sorry.
I hope you all stay safe, man.
Get to get somewhere you can get.
You know, take care of yourself.
For real.
For real.
One, the rato.
(51:56):
Waters, spiders, flooded streets.
Rodriguez is going to be back on the streets trying to fix things.
Will he be on likely here?
We'll see.
Maybe.
We like to throw our wrench and our already broken stories.
So we're going to spend one more wheel.
Let's go.
Yeah.
We like to get a little bit of your effort.
(52:17):
We're going to spend one more wheel called the topic wheel.
That big wheel.
So let's spin that puppy.
Rott.
Hey.
I'm going to go.
I'm going to go.
Woo.
I'm going to go.
I'm going to go.
Jen, the guy is spinning and the guy is spinning.
That's what he just said.
If you are, if you are.
Okay.
So if you all don't know, when Nick is to be mega fast,
(52:38):
it sounds like Japanese.
But it's like, that means that.
I mean, I just put it on.
I'll be cracked a code.
May I hurt it?
Of like that.
I mean, that nigga be spinning.
The topic is, remember.
Remember.
Okay.
All right.
Remember.
So like like, like Simba's dad.
(52:59):
So Rodriguez, is, he's got his big boots on.
You know, he's got his uniform on.
He's still looking good though.
You know, he's got a hat on.
The rain is not covered.
His face and his ready hair.
So he actually is mangain the look.
He sees the manhole cover where he was working before.
How do you get in there?
How do you get in the manhole cover?
(53:20):
Yeah.
How do you get in the manhole?
It's open.
It's just open.
It's gay.
Okay.
I just, I just crawling.
I just crawling down the little ladder that's there.
It's like three, three little.
In the inside of that manhole.
I said, just shimmy inside the manhole from the back.
Not the front manhole.
You got to go through the back manhole.
So he goes across.
He goes down there.
(53:41):
He turns on his, his little freaking headlight lamp.
And down there is his coworker.
Bob.
And Andy.
And Andy.
And Andy.
Oh, no, cool to say this.
Oh, if it isn't Mr. Hans.
Yeah.
You remember us?
You remember you left us down here in the middle of a job?
(54:02):
Yeah.
We're working down here, bud.
We're working.
And we've been down here all night waiting for you.
Oh, god damn night.
We're kissing our nothings.
Whoa.
Whoa.
And Andy.
I have to tell them.
And they said, what is that?
They make us out of here.
We work.
We work.
We work.
We work.
Yeah.
(54:23):
But let's, let's, let's make someone think we were.
Kissing.
Rubberies.
We've been stuck down here in the flood.
And you forgot about us.
We were going to fix it.
But you've left with all the tools.
So thanks a lot, bud.
Yeah.
Thanks a lot.
Rod Rigo.
You're a son of a bitch.
You're here to finish the job.
You said you do.
Yeah.
(54:44):
I say I am.
I'm here to finish the job.
And show you non pipe layers.
How to really lay some pipe.
Oh, no.
Because the big guy is going to kill us.
I'm going to say something.
It's crazy.
I called you guys ugly.
And now you're in a whole manhole.
And you need my help.
And that crazy.
How you need my help.
And he need my sexiness to come down here.
Lay all this gold and pipe around here.
Because you're got the flip.
Michigan bill pipe.
(55:06):
That's what you're a guy.
You're got the flip.
Michigan.
Glory.
Y'all got glory.
Little pipes.
You don't talk about my pipes.
You don't talk about my pipes.
I'm so big.
I'm just talking about shit.
Fucking.
We are in the desert.
Yes.
Stop saying that.
Eddie.
David.
All right.
You're going to say definitely kiss it.
You guys are definitely kissing Andrew.
(55:28):
I heard it.
Listen, Mr. Andrew.
Okay.
We got some kind of spider queen down by where the pipe burst.
Okay.
She says you want to see you specifically.
See me.
Yeah.
We're not gonna rob Regal.
We tried to do it.
We tried to fix it.
And he said, no, you ugly.
New.
We did.
Now we will be waiting for you.
All right.
So we're too ugly.
(55:49):
And you should eat it.
Find one.
You got to go and deal with it.
Talk to you on English.
Yeah, man.
Well, well, it wasn't necessarily.
It was she sent a little spider to go in our ears.
And it probably translated it.
I think that's what that was for, right?
Yeah.
I think spider's still there.
Yeah.
Your ears are just translating our secret language.
Oh, wait.
Oh.
Yeah.
Okay.
I'm dying.
(56:10):
Okay.
He needs CPR.
I'm gonna put my mouth on your mouth.
It's not kissing, Belle.
I'm not kissing you.
I'm just giving you.
I'm saving your life.
He needs to save his life.
He drops to their ground and dies.
Oh, Bob.
Bob.
Bob.
A spider walks out of the door.
Bob die.
Say, Bob die.
Yeah.
(56:31):
You look around and you see there's on the walls.
There's a, there's an arrow created by webs pointing to a corridor.
Pointing to a website, you know.
Yeah.
Right.
Only Andy's alive now.
It's just me.
It's just me alone.
I never even kissed you, Belle.
(56:52):
He fucking kissed Bob.
I never even kissed you, Belle.
He fucking kissed Bob.
So fucking.
Right, maybe I'll get a hold of yourself, man.
Get a hold of your slaps him.
Get a hold of yourself.
We have to do this for five more things.
We have to do this for five more things.
We have to do this for five hands on my face.
I keep this on clean.
You know, whatever you're pipe hands on.
(57:14):
You could even say, Bob.
You know what?
I should just, I should just do it.
I should just, off myself.
I should just do it right now.
Right now.
No.
Don't do it in front of me.
Oh, thank God.
Because I think I did it.
What I need you to do is go lay by Bob.
Oh, you want me to lay by?
Okay.
Lay by Bob.
You lay down.
And do the things that you wish you could do to Bob.
(57:35):
Let's see what's here.
I'm going to go talk to this spider clean.
Okay.
Okay.
Good luck with that.
I'm just going to lay with Bob.
Who I not in love with.
And I never kissed.
That you never kissed.
That you didn't let him die.
Okay.
So I'm going to go here.
If I need your help, I'm a church.
I'm going to.
Okay.
All right.
(57:56):
You stay here.
You stay here.
I'm going to deal with this spider clean.
Because I got to lay a enormous amount of pipe right now.
Okay.
And I don't need to be distracted because you're all sweaty and stuff.
And it really smells like pringles in here right now.
And I don't need that distraction.
I'm going to distract you.
I'm going to let you hear it.
Please lay with Bob.
You got to go get this done.
Okay.
I'll be back.
(58:17):
All right.
I'll be right here.
Okay.
Bob, I love you.
What'd you say?
No, no, no, no.
Okay.
All right.
Who has to piece Bob?
As he leaves down the corridor, Bob opens one of his eyes.
If he goes on.
Yes, Bob, he comes.
Let's get the fuck out of here.
Close the middle cover.
Close the middle cover.
Close the middle cover.
We got that done.
(58:39):
I don't know a bit.
We're going to cut to the spider clean layer.
Okay.
It's just, there's hearts made of spider webs all over the ceiling and the walls.
And then like lights are leading to like this burst pipe.
It's like spider solitaire.
Yeah.
And then like there's a throne there.
And it is just kind of a nerdy girl.
(59:01):
He's just cute.
She's not.
Oh, she wants anime.
I do a lot of anime actually.
Oh, my god.
This is dope.
She's so little spider here.
Hi, Rod.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Hey, you do new money.
That's crazy.
My name is Spider Queen.
What's a spider queen?
(59:22):
Spider queen to see nine.
What up, SQ?
I've been a long time fan.
And you know, I should bless you.
I'm bless you.
A little bit.
Oh, Mark.
I'm just a really big fan, Rod.
And that's why I burst this pipe and made sure that you'd be down here to spend some time with me.
Uh, we can fill the city full spiders and water.
(59:44):
And water and water.
And we can and it could just be us.
No, no, no.
Listen, listen.
Listen, sQ.
I got that.
I got it.
I got a, I got a, I got a passes pipe.
That's the best of my thing.
I'm, I'm a pipe layer.
I got a lacer pipe.
You got a you got a burst in.
You got a you got a square door on your hands.
And I need to make sure that I've passed this pipe up real as the dishes.
Okay.
(01:00:05):
Well, put the p.
I can totally allow that if you have sex with me.
See that's crazy. I knew I knew you was going you brought me down here for some crazy devs
state and stuff. Why? You see the hearts the hearts. Yeah, I see now. I didn't think it was me. I thought
I was for Bob and Andrew because they're in love. Oh, no, I don't. They're in love. You know how much
background word on. You know, much leather. They snuck out of I knew I knew I knew I knew Bob wouldn't
(01:00:31):
did. I knew Bob wouldn't did. And he just wanted a kiss Bob again. Then they snuck out of here and
close the manhole. I can't even get up out here. So my only option is to fuck you. That's all I got left.
It's the fucking torrential queen spider bit. That's correct. And you know what? That's correct.
Yeah. You know what? You know, if that's got to say my life, then that's what I got to do. As long
(01:00:55):
as it's not recorded and we don't speak about it afterwards, I think that we can make this happy.
No, keep this between you and me. Oh, it's going to be recorded. No, it's not. It has to be.
No, it does not have to be recorded at all. Okay. Fine. And won't be recorded.
First of all, you don't have a phone. Yeah. I mean, I think I'm in the game. I'm a no-key girl.
I don't know exactly. But listen, okay, I won't record it. I just have one other thing I need.
(01:01:20):
I need you to break up with your wife and forget your kid and spend the rest of your days with me.
Listen, I love my kid. I cannot forget about my kid. We, we would have to take care of my kid. I love my kid.
The horse and go ahead and shit. Fuck my wife. Fuck that bitch. Last time we had an argument,
she spit on me for an hour and a half. The bitch is in there. We had the grossest fucking sex.
(01:01:45):
Like how you 35 and you still got a list. Like you and go to the doctor to get the extra
skin cut on your tongue. Like what the fuck is wrong with? She pulls out a serrated knife.
It's either me or them. You have to choose. So you just don't like kids, bitch. I can hate kids.
But you're in thousand of my own, but you want me to impregnate you and give you more spider
(01:02:06):
kids. I didn't say that. That's what you say. You say you want me. I just want you to myself. I don't
want your kid or your dumb ass wife. But you say you want a spider baby is all around the city.
I mean, I already may be through everywhere. We can have a kid we can't. I didn't really
matter to me. Rodrigo, she just wants that pipe. You just want some pipe. I just want the pipe.
That's all I care about. What's the pipe you want? I got different pipes. There's a whole
(01:02:29):
plethora of pipes. But it don't come from free. You get free pipe. Free pipe. Everybody get free pipe.
Everybody get that pipe. That's the community pipe. Or you get the gold pipe that I've been
laying. But that's into my van. I got to go out. I got to go out of here. Go get the gold pipe.
Okay. Now, do you trust me enough to go out here? Get the gold pipe and bring the gold pipe back to you?
You're not going anywhere. To get closer and closer and closer with the serrated.
(01:02:50):
We're not a fucking legend here. Either I go get this good pipe. Or you're going to get the regular pipe.
And you don't look like a regular pipe. Big back bitch. Okay. You like PVC? You look like a big. You look like a big bitch.
Big back bitch. Like your pipe. I got to go get the good pipe. It's in the back of this.
This is in the far back of the truck. I'm a gold gate. I'm a come. I'm a come back. I'm a
bring you some good. The good golden pipe. All right. But you better come back. I'm a come back.
(01:03:15):
Better come back. Come back. Come back. I'm going to fly this hall. I'm going to fly.
I'm going to get a back. Stop squared. And just give me a say. I'm going to get this.
For the whole this, hold the regular pipe. You go hold the regular pipe. This is attached. You got
10 minutes. The whole just hold the regular pipe. I'm going to go get the gold pipe. All right. Just hold the
regular. I don't know what you're going to do with the regular pipe. But let me go get the gold pipe. Okay.
Just hand her like a pipe. Okay. I don't know. Let's tell you what you got. Yeah. Go hit. It's PVC.
(01:03:39):
It's PVC. So you go out and you you exit out the way you came. You see Bob and Andy
by their truck. Not kissing. Oh. What? You weren't the first to see that.
(01:04:00):
And oh, I'm alive. Wow. Oh, yeah. I'm going to let it flow. Sorry. How was such a die? What happened?
Oh, man. I was like, it's a miracle. It's a miracle. Oh, welcome. Now the route. Oh, did Andrew bring
you back to life? Yes. How was it? I mean, we were kissing. I kissed kiss. I know I, you know,
(01:04:23):
I breathed life into him with my mouth on his mouth. It's not a kiss. That doesn't matter right now.
Did you kill the spider bitch or not? No. What? Why? Because she didn't, it was no killing her. She wanted a
fuck. Of course. Of course she didn't. Yeah. We know. But guess what? She didn't want to fuck me. She
wanted to fuck you, Bob. What, really? Yeah. It was crazy. I was down there. I tried to throw myself
(01:04:47):
at her. I was like, hey, spider, you're so beautiful. You're so sexy. You're so gorgeous. Here,
just have all of me. I pulled out every pipe that I had. She said, notice every pipe. And I realized
I got the premium good pipe. I got a great A pipe. I got gold pipe. You know, who pipe
she need? She need regular daygala pipe. Let's go get Bob. And then I walked up out. I thought to
his dad, because I was just going to let her just take your life for this corpse. But luckily,
(01:05:09):
you're alive. So you're a pipe to stay hard and nicely nice and lively. You know, you got
energy in your pipe now. So you got to go down there. Okay. You go down there. Give Andy kiss.
Let him know everything. It'll be okay. And then you go home. Well, we, we, we'd ever kiss. That's
not, we don't kiss. Andy, you took too long dancer. I know you guys kissed. Okay. Now go down there, Bob.
Damn it. Listen. Andy's going to go. We know. Andy's going to go with you. Okay. He's going to
(01:05:34):
protect you. He's going to come with you. Yeah. Yeah. He's like off his own cover. You're
going to come with you. I come with you. Okay. All right. I'll cover your hair. All right. I'll cover your hair.
Okay. He's going to cover your hair. So you're going to let him go. Andy, yeah. You're going to let Andy go
down with you. You're going to go. I'm going to close this door. This I'm going to close the
manhole because she's loud. She's the squirter is creature. She's an SNS squirter. The screen.
Squirter is a screen. The screen. The screen. It's so you got to, you got to take these tiles.
(01:05:57):
Okay. But I'm, I'm a, I'm a well, this, shed. Okay. When y'all, I don't want to be
welded. When y'all done. It's okay. It's okay. I'm a d-worlded. When y'all come back. But y'all got us
not, y'all got to knock 77 times. Don't see. Great. As a secret not. Okay. Well, he said he doesn't
weld it once he weld to the under. Unwell. I'm an umwell. I promise I'm an umwell. The
(01:06:17):
world. Okay. But I need to get here. Listen, Y'all can even take my good pipe. Yeah. Yeah.
You both here. You have been, you have been promoting. It's a good. Yeah. Go ahead, give it a
best probably I can give it get she wants she wants Bob okay, but I'm we're gonna say Andy that we'll give her two for one special
Oh, I'm gonna go back to the corporation office to get the the the the the the the
(01:06:41):
Persephone pipe okay
Cuz then I'm gonna bring that back and then I'm a joint and we're gonna switch okay. Yeah, yeah, so y'all got it though
You know what I was wrong about you
Yeah, I thought we were just some some handsome pretty boys
Gamma guys
I'm gonna do everything bad for open. I even I even got you guys is invitation to my birthday
(01:07:08):
Invite some birthday
Nothing I just need y'all to go down there and later
No
I
(01:07:52):
Love you guys go ahead. Do you guys be great be amazing okay go down there fuck that spider clean
Break the legs off her ass, okay, and then y'all
That 77-ton I'm open this a but no if y'all not 77-ton
Not here I'm at the corporate building getting the best the holographic pipe
(01:08:13):
Okay, so if time takes a little time just know I'm on my way back
Okay, I did not forget about y'all that makes sense. Yeah, all right. All right, so go down there and go saved save humanity
Save human we're gonna work like unlikely heroes of some kind of day
Nobody thought it was me no it's y'all
(01:08:35):
It's y'all I'm gonna tell everybody story heroes
I'm gonna tell everybody about this story man. It's the the day the Andy suck Bob off
The day that the spider queen got taken down by Bob that's the day that's the day
Just gonna go down in here check around like Chris Brown. Yeah, so cut to them going down the ladder with the golden pipe
(01:08:56):
Rodriguez welding it shut
Welding all of the manhole cover. Oh nice and tight nice and tight
And we're gonna cut to Rodriguez home
He is entering the house and his daughter comes out mom still sleeping
(01:09:18):
So far the dad what what happened? Oh, and then I had to go do this top secret mission
Then laying no pipe though
Oh, you know trying to stay faithful to you, ma are you did you save the city?
Guess you could say that
In a roundabout way. I guess you could say I saved the city and in breaking news water seems to be slowly going down
(01:09:41):
You hear that you hear that sweetheart? That's what you did did Lydia's on the screen not thanks to Rodrigo by the way
That guy laid some pie leaves. Here's a picture of him again. He's sneezing in the picture
What a fuck is Lydia always hate the real heroes?
I Bob and Andy who gave their lives gave their lives to
Take down a spider clean. They're analyzing the city and
(01:10:04):
Domin Andy are the ones who saved the city and
miraculously they sealed themselves shut away from the spiders in the spider queen underneath the structure of the city
They're the spits get all this information. You might be asking how do I get all this information?
timely news story. She ripped off her face
Because I'm the spider queen
(01:10:24):
Oh my god the whole time this is like my god breaking news and I'm trapped down here if anybody
Was this
This is a story of me
Robin Andy are there hey, we're here to this is a story of me in my two husbands
We're in love you guys do
(01:10:47):
We saved the city. Not right. We go. It was that staltar. Yeah, lies lies
We cut to a news anchor. Okay. That was okay. That was strange so Lydia was
Happened to be a spider queen and something about a city being flooded because of that
Let's just go over to sports
Scott, what do we got going on and in baseball?
(01:11:09):
In baseball cut to 100 years in the future. We see a statue of Rodrigo holding a golden pipe
And we're deep underground in the sewers spider hybrid human people all over the place underground layers
upon layers of pathways driving
We see Andy looking up at this statue and his little spiraling grandchild coming up
(01:11:34):
That is
Not a hero. Tell you that not a hero
Either statue of well, he just so handsome. They thought he'd make a good statue
So they gave him a statue
It's very hot. He's very hot. Yeah Bob rolls around
(01:11:55):
He put his arm around Andy. Yes, we're married by the way. I'm new. We don't guess nothing
He was Rodrigo
Here's the one who covered us up long time ago
From the rain the torrental rain and now a spider folks leave us here underground in harmony and harmony
(01:12:17):
Patient check and grease and chicken grease and and work. We're good. We're good. We're great
Even I'm going far us to say that we're great. We're doing. We're doing. We're doing great
We're not kissing though
It's gonna end it there. Okay, that's the end guys
We did it we did it. We told some kind of story. Are you okay?
(01:12:42):
Fucking hell, this is fucking funny. He'll be president one day
Well, we told a story guys
I can't say it was good
It's a word. It could have been misconstrued as a story. I want to I want to thank our special guests today
Frederick White thank you so much for being here. Thank you
Appreciate the old
(01:13:04):
Thank you for what they go buddy. He's an amazing story. You did your third bucket. I know man. This is dope. What do you think?
Do you think Rodrigo learned anything?
Yeah, Rodrigo learned some gay things. You can't trust your coworkers and
You just can't trust your coworkers. No workers are trifling conniving us
(01:13:26):
Fucking perics who think they could like pipe everywhere. They want to that was some fascinating
And by me he almost got trapped under there by the spidercoins
You know, had to do a switch of room. You know, it's a video goal in the city of Go Man, El Dorado
Wow, now he's free to like pipe where he wants to he or broke up with his wife because I was the agreement
(01:13:47):
He made he got custody of he got custody of foul and
And then yeah and Bob and Andy are still fucking each other secret to do you think
But they're not kissing though. I think Rodrigo's gonna miss that mushroom tip soup
No, no
Fuck no
Mushroom. Why is it green?
(01:14:10):
He's off to greater heights
Frederick, where can people find John mine?
You can find me out friends underscore different FR
EDS underscore DIFF EREMT do not spell the underscore, please
It's just as simple as this line face underscore different and that's all platforms you can find me on YouTube twitch
(01:14:31):
Yeah Instagram Facebook only fans
I spotted you got anything going on after March 18. Um yeah
Hopefully the club will be back open so I'll be
Bring your scroll my thing your fingers crossed. I do have
Um I'm doing Chris crazy's wing event
He's having a wing competition so I'll be I'll be the host of there. I'll be one of the judges there
(01:14:53):
Yeah, he's fucking hilarious. Oh yeah
Yeah other than that. I'm just writing creating content. Thank you. I'm my kid. I'm full of time student too
So yeah, you know
I'm going to school for communications
Oh, let's go. We're not a talk good or huh. Yeah, that's it
This is how you can do that. I would say you're already graduated
Yeah, you're probably gonna get it quite well. Appreciate you guys, man. Thank you. I just need a degree
(01:15:17):
So I mean get a good. Yeah, yeah, but other than that. Yeah, it's cool guys do you check out Frederick White
He is hilarious. I am he is different and he is running for president. Yeah, thank you
Yes appreciate both for him
Over
Nuckity where can they find your ass?
Oh, man my ass is on only fast the inner the inner webs not from the spider queen, but you know
(01:15:44):
They're out there nice it's it's listen just
So on the internet that's what it's called right yeah, okay on the internet you can type in an
And you do a dy all like social media
Perhaps no for for instance and
And maybe you find me there and it'll be probably like beats and
(01:16:07):
You can look through those beats and if you like one of those beats, I'll sell it to you
I'll sell it to your face
And if you live around the Tacoma Seattle area look I got I run a studio here, man if you want to come
Do a podcast or record a song or whatnot, you know
I'm a big set motherfucker and I make you sound all good and shit
and
(01:16:28):
I don't know why I'm sweating so much right. Yeah, I don't know why you nervous
Why is he so nervous right and
This was the sweat was just the sweat is just part of the promotion you'll you too can also
If you want to follow my sweat follow me on
I don't know why I'm so nervous right now
All right guys, thank you so much
Thanks, guys, man. Thank you guys
(01:16:50):
Thank you for having me this year was lit yeah, yeah, yeah, please age you for coming bro
Thank you for all right. Thanks for helping us tell this dumb story. It's really important
Shout out to our tips for the value yeah channel. Tartistic because this is fun
Prefutes yeah, we're pleasure having you. Yeah, yeah, man all right guys you drive safe. Yeah, drive safe fucking
(01:17:11):
Amazing also vote responsibly. Yeah, yeah, just don't vote at all
Bye bye. Love you definitely not good