Derate The Hate
Bettering the world one attitude at a time. We did not create the hate, but together, we can πΏππ§ππ©π πππ πππ©π! In a world filled with divisiveness, and dominated by F.O.G. (Fear, Outrage & Grievance), it's time we find a better way to engage. That all starts with each of us as individuals. We cannot control all that we encounter within our day to day lives, or the environment in which we live, but we certainly have the ability and responsibility to control how we react to it. For me, it starts with gratitude and personal accountability. Take a listen and see if there is something here to help you in taking your part in turning down the hate. Welcome to the πΏππ§ππ©π πππ πππ©π ππ€ππππ¨π©...
Episodes
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Most of us talk about injustice all the time. Far fewer of us stop to ask what justice actually is. John Adams has spent years with that question, first reading the great books in hotel rooms between deals, then translating them into games and puzzles as a youth pastor, and now in his novel, The Third Phase.
The book grew out of a conversation with his daughte...
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William F. Buckley Jr. had strong opinions and never apologized for them. He also spent forty years as close friends with liberal economist John Kenneth Galbraith, and decades more as a friend of Ira Glasser, longtime head of the ACLU. When a fellow conservative publicly complained that Buckley had too many liberal friends, Buckley’s reply was that he d...
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Trime Persinger’s homework assignment was simple: take ten “you” statements and turn them into “I” statements. She couldn’t do the first one. “You make me angry” was the language she grew up with, and she didn’t have another way to say it. Her instructor stayed after class and wrote all ten for her.
That mo...
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Matt Koesters didn’t come to electoral reform through theory. He came to it by watching it happen. As a reporter in southern Indiana, he covered a sheriff’s race where the winner needed just 37.7 percent of the vote, because the majority split its support between two candidates. The result reshaped local politics almost overnight. When a crowded 2...
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Dialog Lab is a new app built on a simple premise: most people want to talk to someone who disagrees with them, they just don't know where to find that person, or they're afraid of what it might cost them. The app matches users with someone who sees a topic differently, lets the conversation happen asynchronously over messaging instead of demanding a schedule...
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Lura Forcum returns to talk about a word that's everywhere in politics right now: purity test. Her recent USA Today op-ed argues that the Democratic Socialists of America have pulled the Democratic Party further left, and Wilk and Lura use that as a jumping-off point to dig into something people on both sides of the aisle will recognize: why political parties...
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Adam Mizel is back on the show with an update on Unity Seats, the program he built to get strangers from different walks of life sitting together at games — and it's grown fast. Since his last visit, Adam and his team at US United have run Unity Seats with the Twins, the Lynx, and the Vikings here in Minnesota, working closely with the Sheriff Unity Net...
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Larry Rosen built a career as a mediator, working through disputes between people who already knew each other and had a reason to want to get along — business partners, divorcing couples, families untangling an inheritance. He started wondering whether that same process could work between total strangers who disagreed about nothing more personal than po...
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Wesley Warshawer grew up in Tucson in a house full of difference — different religions, politics, and backgrounds — and never thought much of it. That changed in 2017, when a poll about the American electorate made him realize how disconnected he'd become from half his own country, despite years spent studying and living abroad.
So he did something...
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The Minnesota Land of Neighbors campaign is a multi-year, collaborative effort by a coalition of Minnesota foundations and bridging organizations — including Braver Angels, Civic Bridgers, Common Ground USA, CRD Connect, and Media Minefield—highlighting our shared values while countering toxic division and helping Minnesotans reconnect as neighbor...
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Roshan Bliss has spent his career working the space between people who disagree — first as a mediator, then as a public deliberation practitioner, and now as the architect of one of the more ambitious bridging projects out there: a reality TV show called A House Divided.
Roshan and Wilk dig into the idea of “many-to-many” conflict — why...
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Kelsey Blahnik has spent her career as a social worker sitting across from people who don't see eye to eye—politically, personally, every which way—and she's found that peace was never about avoiding the hard conversation. It's about learning how to have it.
In this episode, Kelsey and Wilk dig into her book, The And Way: Assertive Peacemaking in a...
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Erez Levin spent nearly a decade inside Google's ad tech world before becoming one of the loudest internal voices warning that the industry was built to reward quantity over quality — and that those same broken incentives are what fuel outrage, fear, and grievance across the wider internet.
Now Erez writes at Holding the Line, where he makes the case for...
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Paid protesting is one of the most divisive — and misunderstood — topics in American civic life. Adam Swart, founder of Crowds on Demand, has spent over a decade inside that world, organizing demonstrations across the political spectrum. In this conversation, he pulls back the curtain on how modern protests actually get funded, coordinated, and am...
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Elizaveta Friesem has spent her career trying to understand why people who could be connected end up disconnected instead — and why so much of that disconnection gets explained away with blame. Her book, Media Is Us, starts from a simple but disruptive idea: media isn't some outside force manipulating us. It's just another form of human communication, s...
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Shaka Mitchell is a lawyer and education policy veteran who built something unusual out of a pandemic-era habit: getting friends together once a month, picking songs tied to a theme, and talking about why. That casual ritual became the Come Together Music Project, now a podcast and live event series Shaka's run with friends, strangers, and colleagues across t...
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Maryam Mehrtash spent nearly two decades building narratives for Marvel, Disney, Paramount, and some of the biggest brands in entertainment. Before that, she was a refugee kid learning English from cartoons, carrying forward the storytelling legacy of a grandmother who was imprisoned in Iran for the same gift.
In this conversation, Wilk and Maryam dig into wha...
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Julia Minson has spent 25 years studying disagreement—not how to win arguments, but how people actually engage with views that conflict with their own. She’s a Harvard professor, a behavioral scientist, and the author of How to Disagree Better. This conversation gets into the heart of her research.
One of the most useful ideas in the episode: being...
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Diego Sanchez grew up undocumented in the United States. Jim Robb spent nearly thirty years fighting for immigration restrictions. They sat down at the same table, and discovered something neither of them fully expected: they could trust each other.
This bonus episode drops ahead of the 2026 Braver Angels National Convention in Philadelphia—where Diego a...
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What if the problem isn't the people on the other side — what if the problem is just hard? Martin Carcasson has spent 20 years building deliberative processes in Northern Colorado that help communities move from argument to action. The Center for Public Deliberation he founded at CSU has run over 600 community meetings, working with local governments, s...
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