June 10, 2025 • 25 mins
What do you do when leadership punches you in the gut—and you feel like you’ve totally failed?
In this raw and honest episode, Zach Hensrude shares what it’s like to hit that wall of self-doubt and disappointment, when the only words in your head are, “I suck.” Instead of sugarcoating it, Zach walks through a powerful 4-step reflection process his coach taught him that reframes failure and turns tough moments into leadership growth:
- Write down the facts.
- Ask yourself: How do I feel?
- Challenge: Is that feeling even true?
- Clarify: What outcome did I actually want?
This is the episode every leader needs—not when everything’s going right, but when it all feels like it’s falling apart.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:03):
Welcome to the Different Thinking Podcast,
where creativity is welcome,conventional wisdom is tried and
tested, and growth anddevelopment are nourished so
that someday you can help tochange the world.
Now here's your host, ZachHensrood.
SPEAKER_01 (00:21):
Well, buckle up.
This is going to be an episodewhere I'm just going to be very
open, raw, and real.
I know those sound like reallytrendy words, but just to be
putting it all on the tableright here, this is truly going
to be one of those raw episodes.
This isn't going to be fluff andbuff and let me tell you how
(00:45):
awesome I am.
No, no.
This is really opening up thecurtain.
And actually, I really enjoythat, by the way.
You see productions orbusinesses and they look like
they got it all put together.
And then you peel back thatcurtain and you see the bailing
(01:05):
wire and duct tape that isholding the thing together.
And sometimes that's that momentof, wow, I had no idea that this
business struggled the same waythat my business does.
I didn't realize that I wasn'talone in all of this.
And so just a reminder, I'm justa guy with a microphone.
(01:30):
And I'm just like you.
I'm an aspiring leader.
I always want to evolve in myleadership.
So here's the opportunity for meto peel back the curtain, show
you that bailing wiring ducttape that is keeping this all
together.
and just have an open, raw, butreal conversation.
(01:55):
Like totally putting away thatpuffery of, oh, I got it figured
out.
I shared in the last episode whythere was a gap in the Different
Thinking podcast.
I spent the last 10 monthsunderstanding that while I
(02:15):
thought I knew what I was doingand I thought I had a good
handle on it and I had theconfidence.
I wouldn't say pride.
I wouldn't go that far, but Ihad the confidence in that I
would be successful at what Iwas going after because I knew
(02:37):
this business.
I knew what I was doing.
And then to spend this next 10months doing to quickly come to
understand that I know nothing.
I am in a place of learning.
I talked to a coach of mine justabout a month ago and I told
(03:00):
him, I said, I just got a masterclass in business because
everything I thought was what itwas, was not what it was.
And Everything that surprisedme, I realized that if I would
have just stepped back out of myconfidence for just a moment and
looked at the numbers and lookedat the trends, I could see this
(03:25):
coming.
I think that's one of thecraziest things is that when you
are operating in business andleadership, whether it's an
organization, I even think aboutthe times that I've coached
youth sports, right?
When we've failed mission orwhen we've failed our goals,
this always pops up.
(03:48):
And so raw, real, emotionaltalk.
This podcast episode is going tosound very, very direct.
But it is that simple.
I suck.
I suck.
I'm not the best there ever was.
I'm not the Muhammad Ali ofbusiness.
(04:11):
I suck.
And it happens when you missyour goal.
You fall out of mission.
When you falter or fail.
In just a little bit, I'm goingto be doing an episode on
hitting rock bottom.
When you hit rock bottom, thishappens.
(04:35):
is a very real conversation.
And if you are a leaderlistening to this going, yep,
that's where I'm at.
Well, I hope this episode willhelp you.
If you're a leader that's like,no, I'm not there yet.
I hate to say this, but you willbe.
You can't be a leader withoutfailing.
You can't be a leader withoutfalling short.
(04:58):
Now, there are varying degrees.
I mean, it's really true thatthere's varying degrees of
success.
and varying degrees of failure.
You know, in not puttingtogether a deal or a transaction
that would help you might be afailure, but it's not a failure
(05:21):
that hurts.
Having somebody embezzlethousands and thousands of
dollars and then you look atyour bank account, well, yeah,
that is a failure that can hurtreally bad.
Now, I'm not saying that's whathappened to me.
I've seen that happen inbusinesses.
But failures and successes arevariables.
There's really life-changingsuccesses, and then there's just
(05:46):
those incremental successes.
But no matter what, as a leader,you will get to this point or
come back to this point at someplace in your leadership where
you look in the mirror and aftera failure, after a falter, and
you just say it.
(06:09):
Man, I suck.
I'm horrible at this.
I failed.
You may even start to think Iquit.
I can't do this.
I can't lead these people.
I can't lead this organization.
I mean, those are really...
(06:31):
Strong emotions.
They're not, it's not easy.
Actually, the easiest part ofall of this episode is just me
sitting here talking about it,actually going through the
process.
And especially again, when Ibring up that episode about
hitting rock bottom, this is theeasiest right here.
(06:52):
Just talking about it.
It really is.
It really, really is.
I recently have had more mentorsenter my life and I created a
podcast episode called mentorsand coaches.
There's, there's, there is a, adifference.
There's a, there is a chasmbetween whether it's coaching or
(07:16):
mentoring.
And so this is a true mentor.
And actually there's been acouple of mentors, but these are
people that I reach out to thatI connect with.
And ask questions.
And I guess it is a bitcomforting to hear my mentor
(07:38):
say, well, I remember when I wasin this point.
Oh, I remember when I facedthis.
Oh, these numbers, whether it'sthe economy or even your
business numbers.
Okay, this makes sense.
I remember when I was here andhow I got out of it.
That can be comforting, but itdoesn't necessarily change the
(07:59):
emotion.
So in this episode, I want tohelp change that emotion.
Because while you have thatfeeling of I suck, and it's a
very valid feeling, by the way,that's one of the things of
testing conventional wisdom, bythe way, in leadership, leaders
used to tell their people thatfeelings don't matter.
And yes, there are some that doviolate it the opposite way
(08:22):
saying, I just don't feel ittoday.
Not that they have actual traumaor actual hurt feelings or
actually they're not feeling it.
They just use it as an excusefor laziness.
So let's remove those extremes.
(08:42):
And emotions do matter.
I think if you recall thegrieving leader that I recorded
a couple of years ago, thegrieving leader is exactly that,
that people, especially asleaders, they don't care.
And when I say care, I want tobe raw with you.
While they'll give you hugs andthey'll send you cards and
(09:04):
flowers, and while they willcare for you, they don't care
unless it affects them.
Unless they're going through thehurt.
So when you hit this currentreality or when reality strikes
and you realize, wow, I suck.
(09:26):
How do we fix that?
Because you can connect with theemotion, but how do you fix it?
Well, it starts by this, andthis is a hard and fast rule.
This is absolutely the rule.
You can hear somebody else sayit differently.
And I will tell you that It justdoes not work.
Right here, I am being theexpert matter on this, the
(09:50):
material.
I have tried it multipledifferent ways, and if I don't
do it this way, it will notwork.
So people will tell you, oh, no,it's okay for you to talk
through it.
No, no, no, it's okay.
You can just record it.
You can put it on video or evenpodcasts.
No, no, no, you can just type itout.
(10:11):
Just type it on a computerscreen.
Type it on your phone notes.
It does not work.
It will not work.
You can...
Turn around and say, Zach,you're wrong, but I'm telling
you from trying it over and overagain, the hard and fast rule is
that you must get out, whetherit's a scrap piece of paper, a
(10:34):
napkin, whether it is a collegerule or it is just a blank
printer piece of paper, get apiece of paper out.
Whether it's a pen, pencil, orcrayon, it does not matter that
you need to physically writedown That's all that matters.
(10:55):
You have to physically write itdown.
That's what creates the success.
So hard and fast rule that itmust be in your physical
writing.
It must be in your handwriting,whether anybody else can read it
or not.
It does not matter.
(11:15):
And again, whether it is in pen,pencil, or crayon, does not
matter.
Whether it's on a napkin,napkins, toilet paper, paper
towels, any type of paper youwant to pick, it does not
matter.
Heck, you can even write it onwalls.
I don't recommend it, but youcould.
It just needs to be in physicalwriting.
(11:37):
This process, which I havelearned from Coach Satemanali,
is a mini process that I'm justgoing to walk you through very
quickly to help you get back upfrom the reality that you suck.
Because you did fail.
(11:59):
Listen, I am not going tosugarcoat it, and I will be the
first to tell you on thisepisode here.
Anything that has negativelyaffected my life as of that 10
months of going through themasterclass, all of it, I had
control of all of it.
I could have seen it coming allof it.
(12:20):
Like it's one of those thingsthat, um, that I really like,
this is stuff that when thatreality hit, it's real, it's
raw.
I wasn't doing it the right way.
Which actually became a gift,which I'll share in just a
moment.
(12:40):
But let's go through thisprocess.
So first thing you need to do,whether it takes a page, a
paragraph, or a sentence, whathappened?
And in this what happened,there's no emotion whatsoever.
So if it's, I think, I feel,nope, that's not acceptable.
It seemed like, nope, notacceptable.
(13:04):
No emotion.
You got to remove the emotion.
Just the facts.
Just the facts.
Three agents left the company.
The seller of this multi-milliondollar transaction backed out.
(13:25):
This business operations failed.
This congregation failed.
Split.
The team lost three games in arow.
No emotion whatsoever.
(13:46):
Nothing.
Just the facts.
That's all you can do.
Just the facts.
That's only the first part.
So if you're like, okay, pause,boop, I'm done.
I'll just write down everythingthat was just the facts.
You're going to miss the rest,but just put the facts down.
What are, what actuallyhappened?
And then once you're done withthat, again, it can be a
(14:07):
sentence.
It can be a few words.
It could be a paragraph.
It could be a page.
It could be a manifesto,whatever, whatever you need, the
length you need it to be.
Just make sure that no emotionsin it, because I'm going to tell
you in part number two here orsection number two, this is
where you get to put the, Ithinks I feel, I hopes I got the
part two is how do you feelabout it?
(14:30):
Now in this, you need to becomevery, very, very open, not just
a little open.
It doesn't matter if you holdonto this page.
It doesn't matter if someoneelse reads this page.
If you want to put some raw,real emotion in there, use raw,
real emotional language.
(14:51):
How do you feel?
Don't sugarcoat it.
Don't press it down.
Don't try to filter it throughsomeone else's eyes.
Lay it All out on the piece ofpaper.
Now, if I was to just judge alittle bit, I would say your
facts are probably going to bevery, very simple and small.
(15:13):
Your feelings are going to bebig and long.
Like, it's just going to be oneof those things where you're
going to be feeling a lot offeels and you're going to be
putting a lot of words on paper.
Now, I found if I was to stophere at...
at this second part here, justby writing out how I feel relief
(15:36):
would come.
Like there would start to be asense of relief.
At least I'm getting it out ofmy system.
They talk about in sports, theips where somebody that has
done, uh, a action or like, uh,we'll just do something simple,
(15:57):
a pitcher, uh, who throws abaseball to, um, you know, a
catcher that's like 60 feet downthe, the, the field.
And they've done this a milliontimes since they were, you know,
seven years old, all of a suddencan no longer get it to, uh, the
plate and their, their arm justdoesn't work anymore.
(16:20):
Physically.
They're good.
Just something mentally that,that hit them.
And what they find is that whensomeone starts to hit something
like that, there's repressedfeelings, repressed thoughts,
like repressed emotions.
And so that's why it's soimportant to start to get this
on paper because once you startto see it in your handwriting on
(16:45):
paper, you can't, by the way,you cannot delete, you can't
delete your thoughts when you'rewriting it on paper because
Sure, you can cross them off,you can black them out, but it's
there.
It's still there for you tofocus on.
You can't just erase it or exitout of the screen and make it
disappear.
And so with that being said, putall that emotion on there.
(17:08):
Then get to section three orpoint number three.
It's very, very simple.
Is what you're feeling true?
You want to know how simple thisis?
Yes.
Yes.
Or no?
There's no in between.
There should only be oneresponse.
(17:29):
Yes or no?
This should be incrediblysimple.
Yes, no.
And if it's true, what did youreally want?
That's point number four.
What did you really want?
What outcome were you reallylooking for?
What were you really hoping for?
(17:50):
If the answer is no, no, thesefeelings aren't true, these
thoughts aren't true, then whatdid you really want?
And you got to write outclarity.
What did you really want to havehappen?
And see, when you get to thatfourth point, all of a sudden,
the truth starts to come out.
(18:12):
Now, there's differentadditional steps where we can
find the lesson.
Was this empowering?
But before I go there, when youhave hit this moment of I suck
and reality hits and it's realand you understand that
everything you've been workingfor is actually been going
(18:33):
towards a failure and notsuccess, writing it out of what
did I want, you start to findthe areas in which you can
change, the areas that you canadjust or evolve in.
You can start to find, how did Imiss it this time?
(18:56):
Curtain peeled back.
Month number one of this10-month masterclass in
business, I didn't figure outthere was a problem.
Month number nine, I didn't haveto figure out there was a
problem.
I could see the problem.
If that makes sense, monthnumber one, I didn't quite know
(19:17):
that there was a problem.
Just things weren't hittingquite right.
But month number nine, I didn'tneed someone to go, oh, hey, you
know, Zach, there's a problemhere.
I didn't need that.
That was very evident.
It was like, whoa, wait aminute.
And I'm looking in the mirrorgoing, I thought I had this, but
(19:39):
I suck.
I thought I was much morefurther past this.
I thought I got this handledbetter.
Whoa, I failed.
I fell short.
I mean, and what was interestingfor me was it wasn't just in
(20:00):
business.
There was parts of my life thatI woke up to this idea of, wow,
I suck.
I went backwards, right?
Again, now looking back,hindsight being 2020, oh, there
(20:25):
was so many warning signs.
There were so many areas where,okay, yep, that makes sense.
I'm heading in that direction,but I just kept going in that
direction.
And while I lament that, while Iam disappointed in that right
now, I can't go back and changeit.
And here's the separator with...
(20:46):
different thinking leaders seeconventional leadership would
just live with it and and wouldjust process through and even
processing is not the right wordthey would just they just float
through it and eventually it maylead to that leader giving up or
(21:07):
quitting it may lead to themcreating disappointment with
their people it may make them doextreme things Like such as
massive layoffs or cuttingspending or cutting contracts
with individuals, with makingextreme changes.
(21:30):
Now, extreme changes sometimesare required, but as a leader,
it's something where as you gothrough this mini process, the
answers in themselves will startto come up.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
If I make this adjustment nowagain, easy part behind the
microphone, what I'm sayingright now, hard parts living it.
(21:50):
Did you catch that?
Write that down.
Easy part behind the microphone.
So when you see a leader on apodcast or on a video and
they've got all this crapfigured out, it looks like they
got it all figured out.
It's all bailing wire and ducttape.
One of the people that I'd loveto have dinner with, which I
know I'll never get the chanceto is Steve Jobs.
(22:10):
And he even had a quote.
That said that this world thatwe live in is made up of made by
people that are no smarter thanyou and I.
And once we realize that we canmold it, we can change it.
And now I know I'm paraphrasingwhat he said, but that's the
idea behind it is this, is thatwhile you have the gurus and you
(22:33):
have the, the people that havestarted multiple businesses, if
you peeled back the curtain,you'd see the multiple failures
that they had.
This is just a process that willallow you to find the answers
without creating more problemsand living in this world where
you say, I suck.
(22:53):
Because here's the truth.
Again, you don't.
Now you failed.
Now this didn't go according toplan.
Correct?
100%.
Yeah, that is on you.
But ultimately, you got yourselfthere.
You can get yourself out ofthere.
You got yourself in thissituation.
You could ultimately getyourself out of that situation.
(23:17):
And so my encouragement to allof you listening today on the
podcast, whether you're in thisposition or not, you will find
yourself where you're one daylooking at the mirror going,
man, I suck.
Because failure comes no matterwhat.
Even the people, again, thathave it all figured out, they
(23:39):
will have still more seasons offailure, of faltering, of
difficulty.
Write it down.
Put it in your words.
Understand that you're reallynot that far away from where you
want to be.
And in there, that's the truepower.
But you have to put it on paper,make it real, put it in front of
(24:01):
you, and that's where you'll seesuccess.
the change.
Thank you so much for listeningto this episode of the different
thinking podcast.
I'm so grateful that you arehere, that you're being a part
of this community.
The greatest compliment, thegreatest gift that you can give
is this to somebody else, thispodcast, you can share it with
(24:22):
them.
If you know of someone goingthrough a hard time, send them
this episode.
and see how you can make adifference and help somebody
else.
Until next time, my friends,thank you so much for listening.
And remember, today is a greatday to apply different thinking.
Take care.
SPEAKER_00 (24:43):
Thank you for listening to the Different
Thinking Podcast.
Please follow the show onYouTube, Instagram and Facebook.
Don't forget to rate and reviewus.
And remember, today is a greatday for you to apply different
thinking.
Thanks again for listening.
Welcome to the Different Thinking Podcast,
where creativity is welcome,conventional wisdom is tried and
tested, and growth anddevelopment are nourished so
that someday you can help tochange the world.
Now here's your host, ZachHensrood.
SPEAKER_01 (00:21):
Well, buckle up.
This is going to be an episodewhere I'm just going to be very
open, raw, and real.
I know those sound like reallytrendy words, but just to be
putting it all on the tableright here, this is truly going
to be one of those raw episodes.
This isn't going to be fluff andbuff and let me tell you how
(00:45):
awesome I am.
No, no.
This is really opening up thecurtain.
And actually, I really enjoythat, by the way.
You see productions orbusinesses and they look like
they got it all put together.
And then you peel back thatcurtain and you see the bailing
(01:05):
wire and duct tape that isholding the thing together.
And sometimes that's that momentof, wow, I had no idea that this
business struggled the same waythat my business does.
I didn't realize that I wasn'talone in all of this.
And so just a reminder, I'm justa guy with a microphone.
(01:30):
And I'm just like you.
I'm an aspiring leader.
I always want to evolve in myleadership.
So here's the opportunity for meto peel back the curtain, show
you that bailing wiring ducttape that is keeping this all
together.
and just have an open, raw, butreal conversation.
(01:55):
Like totally putting away thatpuffery of, oh, I got it figured
out.
I shared in the last episode whythere was a gap in the Different
Thinking podcast.
I spent the last 10 monthsunderstanding that while I
(02:15):
thought I knew what I was doingand I thought I had a good
handle on it and I had theconfidence.
I wouldn't say pride.
I wouldn't go that far, but Ihad the confidence in that I
would be successful at what Iwas going after because I knew
(02:37):
this business.
I knew what I was doing.
And then to spend this next 10months doing to quickly come to
understand that I know nothing.
I am in a place of learning.
I talked to a coach of mine justabout a month ago and I told
(03:00):
him, I said, I just got a masterclass in business because
everything I thought was what itwas, was not what it was.
And Everything that surprisedme, I realized that if I would
have just stepped back out of myconfidence for just a moment and
looked at the numbers and lookedat the trends, I could see this
(03:25):
coming.
I think that's one of thecraziest things is that when you
are operating in business andleadership, whether it's an
organization, I even think aboutthe times that I've coached
youth sports, right?
When we've failed mission orwhen we've failed our goals,
this always pops up.
(03:48):
And so raw, real, emotionaltalk.
This podcast episode is going tosound very, very direct.
But it is that simple.
I suck.
I suck.
I'm not the best there ever was.
I'm not the Muhammad Ali ofbusiness.
(04:11):
I suck.
And it happens when you missyour goal.
You fall out of mission.
When you falter or fail.
In just a little bit, I'm goingto be doing an episode on
hitting rock bottom.
When you hit rock bottom, thishappens.
(04:35):
is a very real conversation.
And if you are a leaderlistening to this going, yep,
that's where I'm at.
Well, I hope this episode willhelp you.
If you're a leader that's like,no, I'm not there yet.
I hate to say this, but you willbe.
You can't be a leader withoutfailing.
You can't be a leader withoutfalling short.
(04:58):
Now, there are varying degrees.
I mean, it's really true thatthere's varying degrees of
success.
and varying degrees of failure.
You know, in not puttingtogether a deal or a transaction
that would help you might be afailure, but it's not a failure
(05:21):
that hurts.
Having somebody embezzlethousands and thousands of
dollars and then you look atyour bank account, well, yeah,
that is a failure that can hurtreally bad.
Now, I'm not saying that's whathappened to me.
I've seen that happen inbusinesses.
But failures and successes arevariables.
There's really life-changingsuccesses, and then there's just
(05:46):
those incremental successes.
But no matter what, as a leader,you will get to this point or
come back to this point at someplace in your leadership where
you look in the mirror and aftera failure, after a falter, and
you just say it.
(06:09):
Man, I suck.
I'm horrible at this.
I failed.
You may even start to think Iquit.
I can't do this.
I can't lead these people.
I can't lead this organization.
I mean, those are really...
(06:31):
Strong emotions.
They're not, it's not easy.
Actually, the easiest part ofall of this episode is just me
sitting here talking about it,actually going through the
process.
And especially again, when Ibring up that episode about
hitting rock bottom, this is theeasiest right here.
(06:52):
Just talking about it.
It really is.
It really, really is.
I recently have had more mentorsenter my life and I created a
podcast episode called mentorsand coaches.
There's, there's, there is a, adifference.
There's a, there is a chasmbetween whether it's coaching or
(07:16):
mentoring.
And so this is a true mentor.
And actually there's been acouple of mentors, but these are
people that I reach out to thatI connect with.
And ask questions.
And I guess it is a bitcomforting to hear my mentor
(07:38):
say, well, I remember when I wasin this point.
Oh, I remember when I facedthis.
Oh, these numbers, whether it'sthe economy or even your
business numbers.
Okay, this makes sense.
I remember when I was here andhow I got out of it.
That can be comforting, but itdoesn't necessarily change the
(07:59):
emotion.
So in this episode, I want tohelp change that emotion.
Because while you have thatfeeling of I suck, and it's a
very valid feeling, by the way,that's one of the things of
testing conventional wisdom, bythe way, in leadership, leaders
used to tell their people thatfeelings don't matter.
And yes, there are some that doviolate it the opposite way
(08:22):
saying, I just don't feel ittoday.
Not that they have actual traumaor actual hurt feelings or
actually they're not feeling it.
They just use it as an excusefor laziness.
So let's remove those extremes.
(08:42):
And emotions do matter.
I think if you recall thegrieving leader that I recorded
a couple of years ago, thegrieving leader is exactly that,
that people, especially asleaders, they don't care.
And when I say care, I want tobe raw with you.
While they'll give you hugs andthey'll send you cards and
(09:04):
flowers, and while they willcare for you, they don't care
unless it affects them.
Unless they're going through thehurt.
So when you hit this currentreality or when reality strikes
and you realize, wow, I suck.
(09:26):
How do we fix that?
Because you can connect with theemotion, but how do you fix it?
Well, it starts by this, andthis is a hard and fast rule.
This is absolutely the rule.
You can hear somebody else sayit differently.
And I will tell you that It justdoes not work.
Right here, I am being theexpert matter on this, the
(09:50):
material.
I have tried it multipledifferent ways, and if I don't
do it this way, it will notwork.
So people will tell you, oh, no,it's okay for you to talk
through it.
No, no, no, it's okay.
You can just record it.
You can put it on video or evenpodcasts.
No, no, no, you can just type itout.
(10:11):
Just type it on a computerscreen.
Type it on your phone notes.
It does not work.
It will not work.
You can...
Turn around and say, Zach,you're wrong, but I'm telling
you from trying it over and overagain, the hard and fast rule is
that you must get out, whetherit's a scrap piece of paper, a
(10:34):
napkin, whether it is a collegerule or it is just a blank
printer piece of paper, get apiece of paper out.
Whether it's a pen, pencil, orcrayon, it does not matter that
you need to physically writedown That's all that matters.
(10:55):
You have to physically write itdown.
That's what creates the success.
So hard and fast rule that itmust be in your physical
writing.
It must be in your handwriting,whether anybody else can read it
or not.
It does not matter.
(11:15):
And again, whether it is in pen,pencil, or crayon, does not
matter.
Whether it's on a napkin,napkins, toilet paper, paper
towels, any type of paper youwant to pick, it does not
matter.
Heck, you can even write it onwalls.
I don't recommend it, but youcould.
It just needs to be in physicalwriting.
(11:37):
This process, which I havelearned from Coach Satemanali,
is a mini process that I'm justgoing to walk you through very
quickly to help you get back upfrom the reality that you suck.
Because you did fail.
(11:59):
Listen, I am not going tosugarcoat it, and I will be the
first to tell you on thisepisode here.
Anything that has negativelyaffected my life as of that 10
months of going through themasterclass, all of it, I had
control of all of it.
I could have seen it coming allof it.
(12:20):
Like it's one of those thingsthat, um, that I really like,
this is stuff that when thatreality hit, it's real, it's
raw.
I wasn't doing it the right way.
Which actually became a gift,which I'll share in just a
moment.
(12:40):
But let's go through thisprocess.
So first thing you need to do,whether it takes a page, a
paragraph, or a sentence, whathappened?
And in this what happened,there's no emotion whatsoever.
So if it's, I think, I feel,nope, that's not acceptable.
It seemed like, nope, notacceptable.
(13:04):
No emotion.
You got to remove the emotion.
Just the facts.
Just the facts.
Three agents left the company.
The seller of this multi-milliondollar transaction backed out.
(13:25):
This business operations failed.
This congregation failed.
Split.
The team lost three games in arow.
No emotion whatsoever.
(13:46):
Nothing.
Just the facts.
That's all you can do.
Just the facts.
That's only the first part.
So if you're like, okay, pause,boop, I'm done.
I'll just write down everythingthat was just the facts.
You're going to miss the rest,but just put the facts down.
What are, what actuallyhappened?
And then once you're done withthat, again, it can be a
(14:07):
sentence.
It can be a few words.
It could be a paragraph.
It could be a page.
It could be a manifesto,whatever, whatever you need, the
length you need it to be.
Just make sure that no emotionsin it, because I'm going to tell
you in part number two here orsection number two, this is
where you get to put the, Ithinks I feel, I hopes I got the
part two is how do you feelabout it?
(14:30):
Now in this, you need to becomevery, very, very open, not just
a little open.
It doesn't matter if you holdonto this page.
It doesn't matter if someoneelse reads this page.
If you want to put some raw,real emotion in there, use raw,
real emotional language.
(14:51):
How do you feel?
Don't sugarcoat it.
Don't press it down.
Don't try to filter it throughsomeone else's eyes.
Lay it All out on the piece ofpaper.
Now, if I was to just judge alittle bit, I would say your
facts are probably going to bevery, very simple and small.
(15:13):
Your feelings are going to bebig and long.
Like, it's just going to be oneof those things where you're
going to be feeling a lot offeels and you're going to be
putting a lot of words on paper.
Now, I found if I was to stophere at...
at this second part here, justby writing out how I feel relief
(15:36):
would come.
Like there would start to be asense of relief.
At least I'm getting it out ofmy system.
They talk about in sports, theips where somebody that has
done, uh, a action or like, uh,we'll just do something simple,
(15:57):
a pitcher, uh, who throws abaseball to, um, you know, a
catcher that's like 60 feet downthe, the, the field.
And they've done this a milliontimes since they were, you know,
seven years old, all of a suddencan no longer get it to, uh, the
plate and their, their arm justdoesn't work anymore.
(16:20):
Physically.
They're good.
Just something mentally that,that hit them.
And what they find is that whensomeone starts to hit something
like that, there's repressedfeelings, repressed thoughts,
like repressed emotions.
And so that's why it's soimportant to start to get this
on paper because once you startto see it in your handwriting on
(16:45):
paper, you can't, by the way,you cannot delete, you can't
delete your thoughts when you'rewriting it on paper because
Sure, you can cross them off,you can black them out, but it's
there.
It's still there for you tofocus on.
You can't just erase it or exitout of the screen and make it
disappear.
And so with that being said, putall that emotion on there.
(17:08):
Then get to section three orpoint number three.
It's very, very simple.
Is what you're feeling true?
You want to know how simple thisis?
Yes.
Yes.
Or no?
There's no in between.
There should only be oneresponse.
(17:29):
Yes or no?
This should be incrediblysimple.
Yes, no.
And if it's true, what did youreally want?
That's point number four.
What did you really want?
What outcome were you reallylooking for?
What were you really hoping for?
(17:50):
If the answer is no, no, thesefeelings aren't true, these
thoughts aren't true, then whatdid you really want?
And you got to write outclarity.
What did you really want to havehappen?
And see, when you get to thatfourth point, all of a sudden,
the truth starts to come out.
(18:12):
Now, there's differentadditional steps where we can
find the lesson.
Was this empowering?
But before I go there, when youhave hit this moment of I suck
and reality hits and it's realand you understand that
everything you've been workingfor is actually been going
(18:33):
towards a failure and notsuccess, writing it out of what
did I want, you start to findthe areas in which you can
change, the areas that you canadjust or evolve in.
You can start to find, how did Imiss it this time?
(18:56):
Curtain peeled back.
Month number one of this10-month masterclass in
business, I didn't figure outthere was a problem.
Month number nine, I didn't haveto figure out there was a
problem.
I could see the problem.
If that makes sense, monthnumber one, I didn't quite know
(19:17):
that there was a problem.
Just things weren't hittingquite right.
But month number nine, I didn'tneed someone to go, oh, hey, you
know, Zach, there's a problemhere.
I didn't need that.
That was very evident.
It was like, whoa, wait aminute.
And I'm looking in the mirrorgoing, I thought I had this, but
(19:39):
I suck.
I thought I was much morefurther past this.
I thought I got this handledbetter.
Whoa, I failed.
I fell short.
I mean, and what was interestingfor me was it wasn't just in
(20:00):
business.
There was parts of my life thatI woke up to this idea of, wow,
I suck.
I went backwards, right?
Again, now looking back,hindsight being 2020, oh, there
(20:25):
was so many warning signs.
There were so many areas where,okay, yep, that makes sense.
I'm heading in that direction,but I just kept going in that
direction.
And while I lament that, while Iam disappointed in that right
now, I can't go back and changeit.
And here's the separator with...
(20:46):
different thinking leaders seeconventional leadership would
just live with it and and wouldjust process through and even
processing is not the right wordthey would just they just float
through it and eventually it maylead to that leader giving up or
(21:07):
quitting it may lead to themcreating disappointment with
their people it may make them doextreme things Like such as
massive layoffs or cuttingspending or cutting contracts
with individuals, with makingextreme changes.
(21:30):
Now, extreme changes sometimesare required, but as a leader,
it's something where as you gothrough this mini process, the
answers in themselves will startto come up.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
If I make this adjustment nowagain, easy part behind the
microphone, what I'm sayingright now, hard parts living it.
(21:50):
Did you catch that?
Write that down.
Easy part behind the microphone.
So when you see a leader on apodcast or on a video and
they've got all this crapfigured out, it looks like they
got it all figured out.
It's all bailing wire and ducttape.
One of the people that I'd loveto have dinner with, which I
know I'll never get the chanceto is Steve Jobs.
(22:10):
And he even had a quote.
That said that this world thatwe live in is made up of made by
people that are no smarter thanyou and I.
And once we realize that we canmold it, we can change it.
And now I know I'm paraphrasingwhat he said, but that's the
idea behind it is this, is thatwhile you have the gurus and you
(22:33):
have the, the people that havestarted multiple businesses, if
you peeled back the curtain,you'd see the multiple failures
that they had.
This is just a process that willallow you to find the answers
without creating more problemsand living in this world where
you say, I suck.
(22:53):
Because here's the truth.
Again, you don't.
Now you failed.
Now this didn't go according toplan.
Correct?
100%.
Yeah, that is on you.
But ultimately, you got yourselfthere.
You can get yourself out ofthere.
You got yourself in thissituation.
You could ultimately getyourself out of that situation.
(23:17):
And so my encouragement to allof you listening today on the
podcast, whether you're in thisposition or not, you will find
yourself where you're one daylooking at the mirror going,
man, I suck.
Because failure comes no matterwhat.
Even the people, again, thathave it all figured out, they
(23:39):
will have still more seasons offailure, of faltering, of
difficulty.
Write it down.
Put it in your words.
Understand that you're reallynot that far away from where you
want to be.
And in there, that's the truepower.
But you have to put it on paper,make it real, put it in front of
(24:01):
you, and that's where you'll seesuccess.
the change.
Thank you so much for listeningto this episode of the different
thinking podcast.
I'm so grateful that you arehere, that you're being a part
of this community.
The greatest compliment, thegreatest gift that you can give
is this to somebody else, thispodcast, you can share it with
(24:22):
them.
If you know of someone goingthrough a hard time, send them
this episode.
and see how you can make adifference and help somebody
else.
Until next time, my friends,thank you so much for listening.
And remember, today is a greatday to apply different thinking.
Take care.
SPEAKER_00 (24:43):
Thank you for listening to the Different
Thinking Podcast.
Please follow the show onYouTube, Instagram and Facebook.
Don't forget to rate and reviewus.
And remember, today is a greatday for you to apply different
thinking.
Thanks again for listening.
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