Turning 40: Embracing Life's Quirks with Karin Episode 1

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Hi there!  Carlene Humphrey, on Diva Tonight for a vibrant new series, "This is 40: A Female Perspective," where I’m thrilled to introduce you to Karin, a passionate realtor who also claims the whimsical title of "official mermaid" in her community. Turning 40 is a profound milestone, and Karin shares her heartfelt journey of intertwining her professional ambitions with her cherished role as a mother, revealing the beautiful dance between work life and nurturing family bonds. Together, we navigate through family dynamics and the nurturing instincts that have been passed down through generations, shaping our identities in unexpected ways.

But that's not all—listen to my musings about the joys of travel and why I choose to explore new destinations monthly, except during the delightful summer months when Ontario's homey charm keeps me grounded. These reflections and more set the stage for an exhilarating new season of Diva Tonight, promising fresh ideas and intriguing guests that you won't want to miss. Karin and I have stories that will make you laugh, think, and perhaps even see your own 40s in a new light. Make sure to follow us on Instagram for the latest updates and behind-the-scenes moments!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
after a long hiatus, diva tonight is back with a new
series.
This is 40 a female perspective, with carlene humphrey hi, I'm
carlene and this is diva tonight.

Carlene Humphrey (00:18):
I have with me on zoom corinne.
We've known each other for alittle while and we're talking
about a milestone like turning40.
But also, why don't you tellthe listeners about you, what
you do, like your?

Karin Rotem (00:34):
career.
Well, I am an official mermaid.
As you can see behind me, I'm arealtor, which, okay, it's not
as exciting as being a mermaid,but I do call myself a mermaid
because where I do a lot of mybusiness, people started calling
me the queen and I don't likethat, right, and it's like a
waterfront community.
So I was like, how aboutmermaid?
Cause that's way more fun andit suits me better.

(00:56):
So, and that's what I do is mylife.
It's actually.
People talk about a balancebetween life and work and then I
get confused by that because Idon't have a balance.
So I kind of realized recentlythat the word is it's my
identity, like it's who I am, soit's like everything about me
is like realtor and just servingmy clients and like what more

(01:17):
can I do for my clients?
And I'm like obsessed and Ilove it and it's just who I am,
so I don't need whatever balanceother people need.
One last rant, and then I'lllet you talk to, is I remember
when.
I was 16 or 15 and I thinksomeone asked me like what do
you want to do when you getolder?
And to me it was like what areyou talking about?

(01:38):
Like I'm going to be a mom,like nothing else matters other
than that.
So I've just always kind ofknown like that's the most
important thing, and I thinkpart of why my work and my
success is my identity isbecause I know that then I can
give to my kids and teach themas well.
That's me.

Carlene Humphrey (01:55):
Yeah, I don't know if the average 16 year old
would say I want to be a mom.
What did your mom do for aliving?

Karin Rotem (02:02):
So my mom is a software engineer.
She worked really hard for usbecause it was just her and then
my brother and myself, and soit's partly that like I saw her
work really hard and I knew alsoabout my grandmother her mom
that worked really hard, andthen my paternal grandmother
also worked really hard, so Ihad good role models in that

(02:25):
sense, yeah, it's just like goand work for it is just kind of
how I've always been.
My brain is always done.

Carlene Humphrey (02:33):
Yeah, I think it's the family instinct.
So if you have siblings, right.

Karin Rotem (02:38):
I do.
So it's not that complicated,but it kind of is so.
My mom and dad had me and mybrother complicated, but it kind
of is so.
My mom and dad had me and mybrother.
So we're four years apart.
And then my parents split.
It's all good.
My dad remarried and so I havetwo more siblings there.
I have a sister that's 11 yearsyounger and a brother that's 16
years younger, and then my momremarried way later and so I

(03:00):
have another baby sister who'snot a baby she would not like to
hear me call her that, but sheis she's 20 years younger.
So there's kind of five of us.
And I remember when my 11 yearsyounger sister was five and I
was tucking her into bed onenight and she said to me are you
my half sister?
Somebody must've said that toher.

(03:21):
And I looked at her and I wentno, like I'm your sister, it
doesn't't you know, and I thinkyou can relate to that too.
Right, it's like your sister'syour sister.
So technically there's five ofus.
Five one hand, includingyourself three kids right, yeah,
so five.

Carlene Humphrey (03:36):
So me and my brother and then two more and
one more, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, I have five the sister.
No, there's five of us and Ihave four sisters, but I never
talk about my dad's side, whichis so complicated.
It's like my dad has severalkids and so when people ask me
that question, I don't reallydig deep into it, but it's one

(03:57):
of those things where I guessit's notorious in the Caribbean.
You know what I mean.

Karin Rotem (04:01):
So your mom has five girls, yeah.

Carlene Humphrey (04:04):
And so, yeah, getting into half siblings, so
they're my half sisters becausewe have the same mom, different
dad, right?

Karin Rotem (04:12):
But do you say that ?

Carlene Humphrey (04:13):
No, no, unless , someone like I mean people can
already see, because I'm like100 percent black.

Speaker 1 (04:21):
Yeah.

Carlene Humphrey (04:21):
I'm darker and and like, if you've seen the
photos right, they're halfItalian, half Grenadian.
So that's a given Right, but,like you said, it's not, it's
never been like they're my halfsisters.
The one thing I used tochallenge, though, I used to say
to people, because sometimeswhen I was younger I'd drop them
to daycare and people would belike are those your kids?
I'm like no, they're not mykids, they're my sisters.

(04:44):
You know I'd get so defensiveabout that because I was so
young at that time.

Karin Rotem (04:47):
I'm like I guess it is possible you know, which is
probably why they asked becausethey probably thought like, wow,
this 12 year old is bringingthis kid to school, that's right
, yeah, yeah, nobody ever askedme, nobody ever asked me if they
were my kids how old were youwhen you took them to like when
you were?
out.

(05:08):
Well, when my sister was born,I would take her out with the
stroller, I remember, and likethe neighbor's dog.
So I would have been 12.
No, I would have, yeah, 12, 13.
I would have been out with herand a stroller and a dog, yeah.
And then my brother was 16years younger, so I was even
older, but I don't think anyoneasked Maybe they did and I just
laughed it off but I don't thinkanyone asked me if they were my

(05:31):
kids.

Carlene Humphrey (05:31):
Yeah, yeah, I don't know.
I guess it depends on thegeneration.
You know, like I said, we aretalking about milestones and for
you it's reflecting back right.
I think I remember you saying,like when you turned 40, do you
remember what that felt like,Like where you were in your
career and like family wise?

Karin Rotem (05:52):
I think for me, the cool thing about 40 is I kind
of like it.
Like it felt like, okay, I'mhere now, does that make sense?
So, like I've always workedsuper hard for the future, I've
always been like about thefuture, the future, the future.
And I think at some point Ijust kind of looked around and
went, okay, I think this is thefuture, like got my kids and

(06:15):
I've got my house and I've gotmy like my career is kind of
like I know what I'm doing.
I'm just can always grow and dothings better and more
efficiently.
But like here I am and kind ofknow who I am, I know what my
values are and so, yeah, and Iactually had to really train
myself because I'm very muchlike some people are really in

(06:36):
the moment and like YOLO kind ofpeople, like you only live once
, like do it now.
And I'm the opposite, like I'mreally like a banker, like I
like bank money and bank youknow, like for the future.
And I think it's a mistake atsome point.
But there's always this tradeoff of like enjoying now versus
the future.
Right, you're always kind ofcompeting with yourself, like

(06:57):
with money.
Do I save money today so thatI'm okay when I'm 60?
Or do I like no, like I'm 40now I should go out and have a
good time in exchange for whatI'll have later.
So it's always hard for me, butmy nature is to bank it and save
it for the future, and I thinkI'm fortunate in that.
One of the things I'm reallygood at is surrounding myself
with good people, including you,and just having a really good

(07:23):
circle, like just good spiritsand successful people too, in my
business.
And so I have a few really good, successful friends in my
industry and I've learned fromthem like how to not waste today
, and so I've had to learn it.
It's not my nature and I knowother people that are like they
go and get themselves their bestcar and they spend a lot of

(07:45):
money going out in their 20s andI always look at that and think
like that's such a mistake,like you've got to, like bank
for the future.
But I think just we kind ofhave to find our balance.
But that's the thing about 40sis I kind of finally told myself
like no, like now, like we liveright, and that doesn't mean
going crazy, although this yearhas been a little bit crazy for

(08:06):
me with travel.

Carlene Humphrey (08:07):
Okay, so clearly, like I do well in real
estate, yeah, wait a minute,you're in Innisfil now, right
Like some place I've never built.
Friday Harbor is like my baby.
That's where I'm likeil now,right Like some place I've never
built.

Karin Rotem (08:16):
Friday Harbor is like my baby.
That's where I'm like themermaid right Like.
I have listings right now.

Carlene Humphrey (08:22):
I love Friday Harbor.
I want to go there.
Take me to Friday Harbor, eventhough I can't afford it.

Karin Rotem (08:27):
Well, come anytime no come and you can afford it.
You can come anytime.
You can come and go to theFrench Cafe, but I have things
all over the GTA, so but thething is that I'm not really
like some people are into Gucci.
What did Gucci make?
Curses or something, I don'teven know.

Carlene Humphrey (08:43):
See, I don't even know.

Karin Rotem (08:44):
But my, my female, my female friends make fun of me
, right?
They're like oh, how do you notknow these things?
I don't know Cause I, it's justI've never really valued that.

Carlene Humphrey (08:54):
Watch Sex and the City.
It will teach you a few thingsabout the brands.
I think if I didn't watch thatshow I wouldn't have like
understood the whole.
You gotta have a Birkin.
You know, like I like a Birkinis like it's like when you go to
New York and you go to Macy'sor you go to like Tiffany's,
it's like a Birkin is I thinkit's $1,500 for a Birkin, is I

(09:16):
think it's $1,500 for a Birkinor more?
What is it?
It's like yeah, it's a reallyhigh-end purse.
I'm not doing that.

Karin Rotem (09:22):
Can I tell you something?
I put bananas in my purse, yeah, and then I forget my bananas.
I cannot be putting a rottingbanana in a whatever you just
said, because that's nothappening.
Because, that's who I am.
Like I have banana all the timeand like it just rots.

(09:44):
Or like chocolate bars I put Ihave chocolate bars in my purse,
like you don't want to look atmy purse.
Oh my gosh, is this beingrecorded?
I'm telling you I'm not, butanyway so the point is that,
because I don't like do thosethings although I'm open to it,
I don't.
I don't judge, like I totallyget it so, but I do love to
travel, like I've always lovedto travel.
So my goal for this year is togo at least once a month, not in

(10:10):
the summer, like I actuallyreally liked being home and
being in Ontario in the goodmonths May through August,
september.
It's really nice here, so Ihave no desire to leave.

Speaker 1 (10:24):
Diva Tonight with Carlene will be back.
New season, new ideas and greatguests.
Send us a message on Instagramat diva underscore tonight.