PDA and the Power Struggle Within: Why Being Told to Do Anything Feels Like a Trap

Welcome back to Divergent Paths, the podcast that explores neurodivergent life beyond the stereotypes. In this episode, host Dr. Regina McMenomy, Ph.D. dives deep into one of the most misunderstood aspects of neurodivergence—Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), sometimes reframed as a Persistent Drive for Autonomy.

If you’ve ever irrationally resisted a task—even one you actually want to do—this episode is for you. Together with co-host Russ Catanach, Regina unpacks the emotional toll of PDA, how it’s often masked, and what it means to work with your nervous system instead of against it. From dishes to diagnoses, this is a candid, compassionate, and occasionally hilarious look at what happens when autonomy becomes essential.

In this episode:

• What PDA really is and how it shows up in daily life
• Why well-meaning suggestions can trigger intense resistance
• How PDA intersects with masking, burnout, and RSD
• Real-world strategies for navigating PDA at home and work
• Why leading with curiosity builds better relationships

Whether you’re newly diagnosed or just starting to explore neurodivergent traits, this episode will help you make sense of your “why can’t I just do it?” moments—and maybe even laugh at them a little, too.

Divergent Paths Consulting: Helping late-diagnosed neurodivergent adults live with clarity, confidence, and ease.

Join N.E.R.D.s (free peer support)

Book a Free Discovery Call with Regina

Regina McMenomy, PhD Regina is a neurodivergent leadership consultant, podcast host, and systems thinker who helps organizations build workplaces where everyone can thrive. With a background in higher education and a passion for inclusion, she brings insight, empathy, and a lot of lived experience to every conversation.

Russ Catanach Russ is a marketing professional, speaker, and co-host of the DIY for Business podcast. Known for his humor and clarity, he brings a grounded, real-world lens to workplace challenges and personal growth conversations.